Chapter 36
1 month later
Turning to face her sister as the front door slams against the wall, Edith drops her head to the side, giving Ada a withering look at the yells floating up the stairs.
"Edith!" Arthur shouts, pounding up the stairs two at a time, rushing down the hallway towards Edith's room.
"I told you not to tell him it was a bloody emergency." She chides playfully, rolling her eyes at Ada who was lounging on Edith's bed, the youngest Shelby stood in front of the full length mirror.
"Well if I hadn't, it would have taken him hours to get here." Ada scoffs in reply, refocusing her attention on the nail varnish she was carefully painting onto her nails, letting out a chuckle as the bedroom door slams against the wall, hard enough that Edith was sure there would be a dent. Gun wielded in the air, Edith eyes her brother through the mirror as he frantically scans the room for immediate danger.
"Put it down you silly git." Edith teases rolling her eyes. "I wanted to see what you thought of the dress."
"You said it was an emergency." Arthur states, lowering his gun slowly and turning his attention to Ada who shrugs, eyes still cast on her fingers.
"Yes. If I don't get your approval today, there'll be no more time to fix up a new dress." Edith replies as Arthur tucks his gun back into the waistband of his trousers, stepping further into the room.
"My- my approval?" He stutters, shoving his hands into his pockets and glancing between his two sisters.
"Yes." Edith replies simply, turning to face Arthur, holding her hands out, motioning to her soon to be wedding dress. "So? What do you think?"
"It's like Ma's."
"It is Ma's. Tommy said I could wear it. That's why I wanted you to see it...to see if you thought...what you thought..."
"You look beautiful." Arthur states, cutting off Edith's worried rambles.
"Arthur-" she breathes out, frowning again as he holds his hand up to stop her.
"Like a picture of her." He continues, swiftly turning on his heel, calling back over his shoulder to Edith as he leaves the room. "Wait here."
"Wha- Arthur! Where are going?" Edith calls after him, throwing her hands in the air. "Arthur!"
"Wait there." Arthur shouts back, making his way down the hallway to the spare room. Edith huffs, side eyeing Ada who shrugs at their brother's actions, glancing up as he re-enters the room, framed picture in his hand. Rising from the bed, Ada pads over to Arthur, peering over his shoulder to get a look at the picture, gasping as she takes it in.
"Bloody hell." Ada breathes out, taking the frame from Arthur and looking more closely at it.
"What? What is it?" Edith asks, stepping closer, curling into Arthur's side as he throws his arm around her shoulders.
"This could literally be you, Edith." Ada states, holding the picture out to Edith who takes it with shaking hands.
"That Ma? When she married Da?" Arthur nods his head in reply, Edith letting out a shaky laugh. Placing the picture onto the dressing table, Arthur reaches out to cup Edith's cheeks, his sister lifting her hands to cup his gently, peering up into his eye. "It would be my honour, to walk you down the aisle in this dress."
And so, a week later, Arthur holds his arm out to Edith, leading her slowly towards the make shift altar, nearly an exact replica of the one John had walked down to marry Esme all those years ago.
"Not too late to back out." Arthur whispers, Edith digging her elbow into his ribs playfully at his comment, rolling her eyes.
"Shut up, Arthur." She teases, holding onto him tighter nonetheless, her heart pounding as they reach aisle, Bonnie knelt at the end, back to her. Placing a kiss to Edith's cheek, Arthur steps back as she kneels down beside Bonnie, lifting her veil to smile over at him, his grin widening at the sight of her. "Hi." She whispers, reaching out to slide her hand into his, Bonnie giving it a tight squeeze back, lifting it to his lips to press a kiss to her knuckles, whispering a greeting back, the pair of them turning to face Johnny Dogs as the ceremony gets underway.
3 months later
Pushing sleepily out of Bonnie's arms, Edith rises from the sofa they had been laid on together, smiling as Bonnie takes hold of her hand, letting his fingers trail slowly out of hers as she moves to the hallway.
"Hurry back." He calls jokingly, making Edith laugh as she reaches for the ringing telephone.
"Small Heath 5-5-2." She states, leaning against the wall, letting out a muffled yawn.
"Mrs Gold, it's Frances, I'm sorry to bother you." The voice on the other end replies, Edith frowning in response, straightening up.
"Frances?" She repeats, brow furrowed. "What can I do for you? Is everything ok?"
"It's Mr Shelby," the older woman continues making Edith's frown deepen. "He's not himself, you see. I tried to get through to Mrs Gray, but I couldn't. I don't have your sister's new number I'm afraid so I thought I'd phone you."
"No, of course. That's fine." Edith reassures her, crossing an arm over her chest. "What's happened?"
"Mr Shelby's not been himself for a while now, but I'm sure you're aware of that." Humming in response, Edith reaches up to pinch her nose, internally chastising herself for not going to check on Tommy sooner. Her stubborn brother refused to answer her calls, and travelling out to Arrow House while Bonnie was at the gym fighting nearly every day, and her brothers working it was hard for her to get to see Tommy. "He's bad today, Mrs Gold." Frances states softly. "I've just found him on the floor in his room, there's an empty bottle of gin by his side, the room is thick with cigarette smoke and there's glass and china all over the floor. And on top of that, Charlie went to see what had happened and saw him like that." At Edith's sad sigh, Bonnie sits up from where he had been laid on the sofa, looking over at Edith who shakes her head, letting her eyes drop closed.
"Is he ok?" She asks quietly, her heart pounding in her chest. "Physically I mean."
"There was blood," Frances tells her gently. "I'm not sure from where. He's locked the door now."
"Ok, thank you Frances." Edith replies, tucking her hair behind her ear. "Don't tell him, it'll probably upset him, but I'm on my way."
"Thank you Mrs Gold," Frances sighs. "I'm so very sorry...I didn't know what else to do..."
"No. You've done the right thing." Edith reassures her. "Thank you for calling me. I'll see you soon."
"What's going on?" Bonnie asks, rising to gather Edith into his arms, his wife resting her head on his chest, clutching his shirt in her hands.
"It's Tommy." She whispers, tilting her head to peer up at him. "It's bad. I need to go to him." Nodding, Bonnie presses a lingering kiss to Edith's forehead, nodding in response to her statement. "I'm going to go and pack. Do you think you could get some time off? I'd like for you to be there."
"Of course I can." He states adamantly, following Edith upstairs. "We can be there for as long as we need."
"Hopefully not too long," Edith states lightly, turning at the top of the stairs to face Bonnie who gives her a soft smile. "I'd like to have our baby here." Reaching up to place his hands on Edith's stomach, Bonnie leans forward, pressing a kiss to her baby bump.
"Not long to go now." He murmurs, moving up a step to press his lips to Edith's. "Let's get ready to go, eh?"
Shaking the door handle to Tommy's room, Edith sighs dropping her head to rest against the door as she takes a deep breath to settle her nerves.
"Tom?" She calls, rapping her knuckles on the floor. "It's Edith. Can you let me in?" At his lack of response, Edith sighs again, taking a step back as she gathers her thoughts. Pulling the spare room key Frances had given her from her pocket, Edith places it into the lock, breathing a sigh of relief as it turns in the lock, the door handle releasing and the door swinging open. "Tommy?" She calls softly, stepping into the dark room, coughing at the cloud of cigarette smoke that hits her. "Jesus." She mutters waving her hand in front of her face to clear the smoke a little. "Hey, Tom, it's me." She whispers, slowly lowering herself to crouch beside Tommy who was sat against the cabinet, head in his hands. "Hey," she whispers again, curling her hand around his, rubbing her thumb over the back of his hand. "Come on, let's get up off the floor, eh?" At his lack of response, Edith sighs, dropping her head back to look up at the ceiling. Using the cabinet to help, she pushes herself to her feet, reaching down to curl her hand around his again. "Come on." She states more firmly this time. "This is enough now Tommy. Get up." Tugging on his hand, she lets out a grunt of frustration, kicking her foot out to knock against his. "Up. Come on. Don't make me get Pol." Reaching down for his other hand, Edith swears under her breath as she pulls her hand away from his, noting the blood that had now covered her palm. "Jesus, Tommy. Come on. Let me clean you up. Hmm? Lets get you into bed, and I'll get you a cup of tea, and some food, and I'll clean your hands up."
Returning to Tommy's room minutes later, bowl of warm water, a bottle of alcohol and a cloth in hand, Edith finds Tommy laid in the same position she had left him, staring up at the ceiling. Sighing, she sinks down onto the bed beside him, gently taking Tommy's hand in her own, turning it over to assess the damage by the soft lamp light.
"Oh Tom." She whispers, reaching out to run a hand through Tommy's hair, letting her eyes flutter closed briefly. "You're going to be ok." Reaching for the rag, Edith mumbles a quiet apology as she presses the soaked cloth to Tommy's injured hand, hardly surprised when he doesn't even flinch. Clearing her throat, Edith focuses her attention on the cuts, racking her brains for something to say to her brother, anything to fill the uncomfortable silence. "Karl beat me at chess the other day, if you can believe it. He's seven! And Billy, he said his first word. Dada, of course. Arthur was over the moon...as you can imagine. Linda...not so much." She teases, smile fading quickly at Tommy's lack of response. "Pol's been dropping off presents for the baby nearly every day. Poor kid's going to be spoilt. I think she's more excited than I am! And Lizzie's looking well. Starting to show. I bet Charlie's excited to be a big brother." Trailing off again, Edith fastens the bandage around Tommy's hand, sighing at his lack of response once again, not even a single flicker of a smile, or eye roll in the time she had been chattering on. Pulling her lip between her teeth, Edith turns, moving to lay on the bed beside Tommy, resting her head on his chest, soothed immediately by the steady pounding of his heart. "I've been dreaming about John again." She whispers, now more to herself than to Tommy, who she was certain was in no state to take in anything she was saying. "I miss him." Curling her hand into the fabric of Tommy's shirt, Edith takes a deep breath before continuing. "I've been telling Pol when she comes 'round. And Bonnie, of course. He gets worried when he wakes up and I've been crying. Naturally." Pausing again, she glances up to gauge Tommy's reaction to her confession. "Pol says I should tell him to leave. John, that is. Not Bonnie." Letting the silence fall between them again, Edith turns her head to look up at the ceiling, breathing deeply to stop the tears that were threatening to fall. "She said that it's not helping me, him turning up every night. That I should tell him that he needs to let me grieve, that when I need him, he'll know, and he'll come back. But I don't think he will." Letting out a soft whimper, Edith clasps her hand to her mouth, taking a moment to collect herself, burying her head in Tommy's chest, her heart constricting momentarily as he winds his arm around her, holding her close. "I don't want him to go." She cries into his chest, tightening her own hold on him. "Because then it will be real. And I'm worried that if I tell him to leave...he'll never come back. I can't have that." Sobs racking her body, Edith lets herself collapse into her brother's hold, reassured by his touch, rather than his words, that she was safe in his arms. "And I miss you." She whispers, sniffing back the few remaining tears. "Finn's moved out, Michael's in America, Arthur's always busy in the shop, John's gone, and you're all the way out here. By yourself. I wish you'd come back, Tommy. We could help each other." By the time she had finally gained control on her breathing, Edith was sure Tommy had fallen asleep, the steady rise and fall of his chest lulling her into a sleepy haze, so when he whispers her name under his breath, she jumps in response.
"Edith?" Tommy mumbles again, reaching his bandaged hand up to cup the back of her head. Lifting her head off of his chest slightly to look up at him, Edith nods in reply.
"Yeah?"
"Go home." At her sharp intake of breath, Tommy lets his hand drop back to the bed, Edith pushing lightly on his chest to sit upright.
"What?" She murmurs, searching his eyes but finding nothing.
"Go home." Tommy repeats, eyes still focused on the ceiling and not on his youngest sister.
"But-"
"Edith." With a shake of his head, Tommy closes his eyes, laying silent for so long that Edith momentarily thought he had dropped off to sleep. "Go home, and be with Bonnie. Go home, and see John. He clearly needs you as much as you need him right now."
"Wha-" Trailing off, Edith shakes her head in an attempt to gather her thought and make sense of Tommy's words. "What do you mean he-" Tommy shakes his head to silence her, Edith's face scrunching into a scowl at his actions, shaking her own head in reply. "No. Did you not just hear me? I need you too. We need each other."
"Edith. Go." Tommy states gently, rolling onto his side. "I'm fine." Muttering a string of curse words under her breath in Romani, Edith rises from the bed, pausing by her brother's side, waiting for him to change his mind, to stop her from leaving. But with no response from Tommy, Edith lets out a frustrated growl, kicking out at the bed as she turns, storming out of the room and slamming the door behind her, much to the surprise of Bonnie who had been leaning on the banister outside the room, waiting for his wife. "Selfish fucking bastard." She shouts, fully intending on her brother hearing the words that were aimed at him. Taking Bonnie's hand in her own, she pulls him down the hallway towards the room Frances had set up for them, muttering as she goes. "Go home, Edith. I'm fine." She grumbles, mimicking her brother, slamming the bedroom door behind her once more. "If he thinks I'm leaving him like that, he's got another thing coming." She tells Bonnie who was stood by the door, waiting for an explanation for her anger. "I'm not leaving here until he does."
When Tommy finally rises from his bed late the next morning, more to keep up appearances for Charlie's sake than anything else, he's surprised to find his son settled comfortably in the lap of his aunt, chatting away to her and Bonnie as they eat breakfast.
"Morning, Tom." Edith greets, flashing her brother a bright smile. Her action immediately confuses Tommy, he had heard her angered shout from outside of his room last night, had assumed (wrongly so, clearly) that she would still be holding a grudge this morning. And yet here she was, at his breakfast table (despite him having told her in no uncertain terms to go home), holding his son and eating his food. "Frances has kept a plate warm for you in the kitchen."
"What are you doing?" He asks, stepping further into the room, keeping his eyes on his sister who shrugs.
"Having breakfast?" She replies sarcastically, rolling her eyes and taking another mouthful of food.
"No. What are you doing here? Still." He rephrases firmly, Bonnie leaning back in his chair to watch the exchange between the siblings, smiling at Charlie's shocked gasp.
"Daddy!" He chastises, peering up at his father. "That's not very kind! Auntie Edith is having breakfast with me, and you sound cross!"
"Because I told Auntie Edith to go home." Tommy states, more gently this time for his son's sake.
"Auntie Edith doesn't listen to your daddy when he's grumpy." Edith whispers playfully in Charlie's ear, the little boy giggling at her words.
"Daddy, you're grumpy!" Charlie giggles, Tommy shaking his head at his sister's pointed glare.
"I'm not going home, until you come with me." She tells him gently, passing her nephew off to Bonnie, who takes the young boy in his arms.
"Come on, Charlie, why don't you show me the horses?" Bonnie suggests, placing Charlie on the floor at his excited yell, reaching out to squeeze Edith's shoulder gently as he passes.
"You- you're not yourself, Tom-"
"Edith. I'll tell you what I told Frances. I know what this is. I know." Tommy cuts Edith off, pulling out a cigarette and lighting it.
"Then what is it? Let me help you, get better. Please!" Edith exclaims, wide eyes pleading up at her brother who shakes his head.
"It's just myself talking to myself about myself."
"How can I help-"
"Edith-"
"Tommy, please!" Edith cries, springing up from her chair, refusing to let him cut her off again. "Please!" Reaching out to rest her hands on Tommy's arms, she squeezes gently, stepping closer. "I called Pol last night. She's going to call the doctor-"
"I'm not sick." He protests, lifting the cigarette to his lips, turning his head away from his sister's prying eyes.
"It's not anything to be ashamed about-"
"I'm not ashamed!" Tommy shouts, shaking out of her hold. "I'm not ashamed. And I'm not sick."
"Polly says it starts when you stop. When you rest." Edith continues, hands coming to wring together as Tommy paces away from her. "I told Arthur telling you to take a holiday was a bad idea, but he doesn't fucking listen either. Heaven forbid I actually know what's good for the brother I've been following around all of my life. I know you, Tommy. Better than you think. I watch. I observe. I listen."
"I know you do." Tommy sighs, dropping his head to his chest, stopping a few steps away from Edith.
"I, know, you." She emphasises, stepping cautiously closer again. "And I need you to come home. Please?"