Chapter 20

Roxanne parked the invisible car in an alley about a block away from where the stealthbots located Minion. He was still being kept in a cooler, she had to get him out of there. This plan would work. It had to. She absently adjusted the pin with Megamind's logo that she had pinned at her waist for protection before she looked over at Kim in the passenger seat and asked, "You sure you're ok with this?"

Kim nodded and said, "Absolutely, your majesty. I'm still on the clock."

Roxanne rolled her eyes and chided, "Stop that. I'm trying to concentrate. You remember what to do?"

"Ready to start whenever you are."

"Here goes everything," Roxanne muttered as she opened the door and stepped out into the night. She set a dehydrated cube on the ground in front of her, then splashed it from a bottle of water. She took a drink from the bottle as the spider-bot rehydrated in front of her. Then she climbed in, making sure she didn't step on the back of the dress that she found in Minion's craft room. And it was a lovely dress. The bodice fit perfectly without making her feel fat and the skirt, while short in the front, flowed out behind her almost elegantly. The black protective undersuit that Minion insisted she start wearing contrasted nicely with the mostly purple dress and the knee-length purple leather stompy-boots she found.

She gave a signal towards where she knew the invisible car was located and watched as several brainbots that were stationed nearby lifted into the air while cradling heavily-laden balloons in their grasps. She waited a few seconds, then directed the spider-bot to follow them out onto the street. The two lookouts nearest her had their backs turned towards her because they were inspecting the sudden paint that erupted next to them from the paint bombs. She used the spider-bot's web cannon on both of them to pin them to the buildings they were next to, causing one of them to drop a gun as they were thrown back.

As she moved forward, the brainbot swarm spiraled endlessly down out of the sky. Some peeled away from the main group and swarmed the other lookouts at the other end of the road, grabbed them and held them suspended in the air. She used the dehydration gun mounted on the spider-bot to shoot at those two lookouts. Those brainbots then joined the rest of the swarm swirling around the vacant lot her targets were located in, preventing them from escaping.

Once she reached the corner of the lot, she stood up and threw a can of knockout spray as hard as she could towards the group that was surrounding the cooler Minion was trapped in. She raised an arm to get the brainbots' attention, pointed at the can, and dropped her arm sharply. Snuggums, the leader of her personal squad (now all named and appropriately colored purple), shot forward and bit the can in two, causing the gas to drop four of the seven guys around Minion. Damn, she was hoping that would get all of them.

She advanced on the three guys still standing. They attempted to back up, but several brainbots broke away from the swirling swarm and formed a tight, bitey wall behind them – preventing escape.

She jumped out of the spider-bot with her de-gun in her hand, but she kept it down and at her side where it was mostly concealed by the drape of her dress. Her personal bot squad surrounded her and helped give her confidence.

"Who is in charge here?" she demanded of the three men in front of her. One of the guys started to raise a gun towards her, but she quickly shot him with the de-gun, and he dropped as a glowing blue cube. "Wrong answer," she said coldly and pointed the de-gun at the other two.

One of the other guys lost his nerve and dropped to his knees with his hands behind his head and said, "Tommy is. Right there. I had nothing to do with it!"

"I think there's plenty of blame to go around," she replied and snapped the fingers on her free hand. A few more of the brainbots broke free and grabbed the kneeling guy, then held him suspended in the air. Once he was neutralized, she pointed her de-gun to the last man standing.

She turned her attention to him and said conversationally, "Tommy, was it? You have someone of mine, Tommy. I'd like him back."

He glanced around at all the brainbots nervously and asked with a false bravado, "W-where's Megamind. I wanted to talk to him."

She smiled grimly and said, "See. The thing about Megamind. Is that he does not take too kindly to threats against him or his associates. He sent me to collect while he comes up with something special. Just for you. Tommy Meyers. Now. Where is he?"

"I ain't saying nothing to you, bitch!" Tommy spat out.

"Oh? Is that right?" she asked with mock surprise. "Well, you don't really have to say much. You didn't even ask how I knew your last name. And you're probably not at all curious how I know about your girlfriend, Sophia. Or that you missed your last mortgage payment." He blinked in surprise and she asked, "Anything to say now?" Once she had a name and address, it was easy to find personal details about him. And it was even easier with Kim's help.

"I-it's in the cooler," he admitted.

"That wasn't so hard, was it? I hope you're ready to talk to the Evil Overlord. He'll be thrilled to see you," she threatened, then dehydrated him. A blue cube replaced Tommy, then she shot it with the decoupage setting to keep it stable. She may have been bluffing about Megamind sending her, but she wasn't lying about bringing the culprit to him. "Pick it up," she instructed her squad. One flew over and grabbed the cube in its pincers then dropped it into her waiting hand. She tucked the cube into a hidden pocket of her dress.

"W-who are you?" the guy that was still suspended in the air stammered out.

She gave him her attention and replied, "Me? I'm the Evil Queen." Then she dehydrated him also.

She turned and walked towards the cooler and dehydrated the four guys still sleeping on the ground before she reached it. She had no idea what dosage of the knockout spray they inhaled, and she couldn't have them waking up while she was mid-rescue. She snapped her fingers twice and a brainbot brought her a bag with Minion's sphere and the small tub of aquarium salt.

She opened the cooler and gasped. Minion was inside, but he was so pale. "Minion! I'm here. It's ok. We'll get you home."

Minion sluggishly looked up at her, squinted, then his mouth moved, but she couldn't hear anything. Either it was because of the lack of speakers, or he was too weak to be heard. She hoped fervently that it was just a hardware issue.

She grabbed the water sphere and placed it next to Minion. "Can you get in here? I don't know how to open it," she asked, hoping that he could understand what she wanted.

He gave her a weak smile, his spinal ridges lit up, then he moved himself right through the membrane and into the sphere.

"Oh, thank goodness that worked," she said as she gently lifted the sphere out of the cooler. "Is the salinity ok? I brought salt," she asked him, unsure if he could hear her, and held up the salt into his view in case he couldn't.

"I-it's better now, Ma'am," he replied weakly. Her nerves cause her to laughed in relief because they could still communicate.

She lifted the sphere up, rested her forehead on it and said, "Oh, Minion. I was so worried about you. Let's get you home."

He moved forward, touched his head to hers on the other side of the membrane, and said weakly, "Thank you."

She smiled and lowered the sphere to rest in the crook of her arm as she stood up. She dehydrated the spider-bot and instructed the brainbots to collect it and the other cubes, then started walking to the invisible car. She dehydrated the two guys she'd webbed earlier on the way.

Once she arrived and opened the door to the invisible car, she didn't see Kim anywhere. A spike of fear hit her before she saw a folded piece of paper on the passenger seat. She gently set Minion down and opened the note.

Roxanne,

Grats! You did it, your majesty! (I won't tell!) Hit me up for drinks later. I just had a job bankroll me, so I'm buying. Bring your friends!

-K-

Roxanne smiled and tucked the note away. It'd be nice to have a friend that didn't mind her association with the supervillain.

She reached across the passenger seat and adjusted the seatbelt where it would hold Minion's sphere steady before she started the car.

"I-I wasn't done with it. Does it fit ok?" Minion asked weakly.

"I don't know what else you could possibly want to do with it. It's a wonderful Evil Queen outfit, Minion. And it fits beautifully. Thank you," she replied as she started driving back to the lair.

"Sir wanted it to be a surprise," he admitted.

She shot him a quick smile before looking back at the road. "And it was!" she answered. "Why don't you rest? You're still looking pale."

"I-I'm doing better. The salt is helping," he explained.

"Oh good. I was hoping the water in there wasn't stale or anything. It was just sitting on the shelf."

"No, it stays oxygenated and it keeps up with my water cycles. Just not much mobility."

"That. Is very good to know," she admitted with relief. Then continued with, "I need you guys to teach me more. I was in way over my head just trying to find you!"

"I don't know. I think you did ok, Ma'am."

"Not really," she muttered. "Um, so… I had to get into the petty cash."

"That's what it's there for," he replied cheerfully, but he was still quiet.

She winced and admitted, "And I used it to hire someone to help me."

There was a lengthy silence and she couldn't help but glance over at Minion to find him blinking owlishly at her. "Oh?" he finally asked.

She nodded and explained, "She, um, she's a programmer at KMCP and she's always been on Team Megamind. I blindfolded her and brought her to the lair to use the computers to identify who took you. And had her program the brainbots for me. A little bit… The, um, the petty cash was to hire her and keep her quiet." Silence greeted her again so she went on, "And, even if she talks, - which I don't think she will! - the only things she knows is that I'm dating Megamind, that you got abducted while Megamind was in prison, and that I dehydrated a lot of people to rescue you."

"And the brainbots," Minion added quietly.

Roxanne sighed and repeated, "And how to program the brainbots. From your computers? That can receive a security upgrade?" she asked hopefully. She took a shaky breath and pleaded, "Don't do this to me, Minion. I tried. But I needed the brainbots and I don't know how to program them to do things." She wiped her eyes and glared at the road. "I needed to save you and I didn't have the time to wait for Megamind to possibly break out early. I did what I had to do, and if we're compromised because of it, I'm sorry! But I needed you safe! And I know Megamind would agree with me that you're more important to us than any possible security breach!"

Silence greeted her again. She opened her mouth to continue to argue then glanced at Minion. He was asleep. She laughed a little to help her nerves and said softly, "See? I said you needed to rest. My guilt and I will get us home."

Soon, she pulled into the lair and parked the invisible car. She threw the switch to make it visible and exited the vehicle. She didn't shut the door all the way, so the noise wouldn't wake Minion. She walked around and carefully opened the door and gently lifted his sphere out. She didn't want her moving him to disturb him either. She cradled him in the crook of her arm again and started walking into the lair. She decided to put him on the couch in the viewing room so she could be nearby when he woke up. Then she could help him into his spare suit once he was awake enough to tell her how.

She only got a few steps away from the car when she heard an unexpected voice behind her, "Roxanne?"

She twirled around, her de-gun drawn and saw Megamind there, still wearing an orange prison jumpsuit. "You're back?" she asked in surprise while keeping her voice down. She'd been too hyped up to even be aware of her Megamind-sensor. Apparently, he can sneak up on her in extreme circumstances.

His eyes took in her outfit and then Minion sleeping on her arm. "What happened?" he asked urgently, but just as quietly.

She holstered her de-gun, walked over to him, put her free hand behind his head and pulled him to her so she could kiss him fiercely. Her boots actually put her just a little taller than him in his prison garb. She pulled back and said quietly, "Let's go set him down in the viewing room and I'll tell you." She ran her hand down his arm until she was holding his hand and led him further into his own lair.

Once they got to there, she set Minion down on the couch in the crease between the cushions. She didn't know how likely it was for the sphere to roll, but she thought one of the seams of the couch would be the best place to prevent that from happening.

She turned to Megamind and asked worriedly, "Will he be ok here? Is there anything else we can do for him? Should I get a blanket? He was exposed to cold freshwater," she explained, suddenly remembering that he didn't know what had been going on yet.

He looked worried and crouched down to get a better look at Minion. He placed a hand on the sphere and asked, "How long?"

After a short pause to count how much time had passed, she answered, "About ten hours or so."

He rubbed his hand gently on the sphere and replied, "He'll be ok. The water inside is restorative and he just needs rest to let his body reregulate."

"Oh, thank God," she sighed and would've collapsed if he hadn't stood and caught her at just that moment. He pulled her toward him, wrapped his arms around her and said, "You look ravishing, my love."

"Thanks to Minion, I'm sure," she said before she kissed him again. Then her conscious got to her. As much as she'd like to peel Megamind out of those prison-oranges, she needed to get him updated. She pulled back and said, "Come on. Let me show you what happened."

She led the way to the computer room and found the flash drive. "I took a nap and when I woke up Minion was gone. I found a note that told me where he went and that he expected to be back two hours previously. I sent out the brainbots to look for him, and well… here's the security footage of what happened…" she handed the flash drive over to him and stood back to let him access the computers.

He grimly took it and inserted it into a computer to watch. Roxanne had seen this clip a few too many times today, so she kept her eyes on Megamind instead of the video. Which was interesting in and of itself. All the restless energy he was always brimming with seemed to focus instead on keeping him unusually still. Like a predator. He suddenly looked dangerous and she finally understood why so many people were scared of him.

At the end of the video, he stood stiffly and turned towards her. He was glaring, but she knew it wasn't at her. "Did you retain the miscreants?"

She gave him a smirk and pulled the decoupaged ringleader out of the hidden pocket and answered, "I sure did. And I told him you had something special for him. The brainbots have the rest of them somewhere."

He plucked the cube out of her hand and looked like he was ready to remove the glue. She put a restraining hand on his and said, "Not now. You're not dressed and we need to make sure Minion's ok. He was really pale when I found him."

He stopped and put the cube down. "You're right, of course. And I need to decide what to do with him. Otherwise, I'll just kill him and no one will take the lesson to heart."

"He definitely needs to be made an example out of," she agreed. Megamind looked at her in surprise. She rolled her eyes and said firmly, "He hurt Minion to 'talk to you.' Do whatever you feel you need to. But make sure everyone who needs to knows what he did and what the punishment is."

"Y-you mean that!" Megamind said in shock.

She gave him a disbelieving look and said, "Of course I do! Look. I know your hands can't be totally clean to be a supervillain. That's just math. So, I know you have to do things sometimes to keep order and to keep yourself safe. So do what you need to do, and I'll still be here when you're done."

He just stared at her a moment before saying breathlessly, "You are incredible."

She just shot him a playful wink and said, "Let's go sit with Minion. I don't want to leave him alone."

"And then you can tell me how you rescued him," he suggested as they left the room.

"Ok, but fair warning. I did something that I think Minion's upset with me about, so you might be too. But I didn't have a choice. Or if I did, I couldn't think of it," she admitted.

"What did you do?" he asked her curiously as they sat down on the couch on one side of Minion in the viewing room.

"Well, I took some petty cash," she admitted.

He waited a little and when she didn't continue, he asked, "How much?"

"It was to save Minion! Does it matter?"

He held up his hands placatingly and said, "No? I'm just wondering if there's any left or if I need to restock."

"No, there's plenty left. Ok, ok. So, I'm bad at computers. I can use a few programs and make my way around others, but coding? Hacking? There's no way. So, I had a license plate and some faces from that security footage and no idea how to find out who they were. So… I hired someone."

He opened his mouth and she held up a hand to stop him and said, "Wait. Please. I knew her from work and she was always more interested in hearing about you and your robots than about Wayne. I made her wear the kidnapping bag when I brought her to and from the lair and only let her see the computer room. She was able to find addresses and to send the brainbots to investigate. And she helped with the brainbot side of Minion's rescue. I mean, that's-that's not too bad, right? I-I didn't know what else to do!" The stress of the day finally overwhelmed her and she threw her arms around Megamind and started crying on his shoulder.

His arms snaked around her and pulled her against him. One hand reached up and caressed the back of her head. "I'm sorry," she managed to get out between sobs.

"Shh, I'm not upset," he murmured to her. "It's ok. You're ok. Minion's ok. We're all ok. Your adrenaline is just crashing, this is perfectly normal." He continued to talk softly to her as she cried herself out.

She eventually raised her head, wiped her face, and muttered, "God. I must look terrible. You're not mad at me?"

He smiled at her and said, "You don't and I'm not. You can tell that I'm not, right?" She nodded, because she couldn't feel any anger or frustration from him. "You saved Minion. How could I possibly be mad at your methods? I wouldn't be mad if you lost Evil Lair in a poker game if that was how you had to save Minion." He gestured around him, "This is just stuff. I can steal, buy, or build stuff. I can rework the security on the computers. But you two can't be replaced."

She rested her head on his shoulder and muttered, "Thank you. Love you, my Mulzakai."

"I love you, too, my dear Roxanne. And I am wildly curious as to how your day went. Would you mind if I pulled up some brainbot footage?"

She laughed softly and let him go so he could grab one of his many keyboards. "Go ahead. But I will warn you a whole lot of it is me running through here like a crazy person any time I had a thought."

He teased in a flat tone of voice, "Gee. That will be something I've never done or witnessed." He reached under the couch and pulled out a keyboard.

"Fine, fine. I get it," she replied while laughing. She's seen him get distracted by his thoughts before, so she knew exactly what he was talking about. And if he'd had some reason to watch his own playback, then he'd probably seen himself do the same thing several times.

He typed for a moment and then leaned back to watch one of the screens, putting his arm across her shoulders. "Ready for the highlights of your day?"

"Might as well. I'm not sure I remember all of it," she admitted.