4/5/2021 UPDATE: HELLO EVERYONE IT IS I the real akira toriyama (real!) it is currently the fourth birthday of my BEAUTIFUL baby boy LARD BEEPUS and this has been a long time coming so i am announcing here that the fic has been REVAMPED! not every chapter is finished but since i wanted to post in time for the occasion, i'll have the first few chapters up and posting the rest over the next few days.

so wat dos this entail? well:

1. MANY new scenes and dialogue and details have been added that will KNOCK YOUR SOCKS OFF

2. many chapters have been merged and slightly rearranged to flow better, and there are some other minor writing improvements for better readability

3. some not so grate jokes from the past have been removed/altered

4. review replies have been added to the beginning of each chapter chronologically

aside from these factors it has stayed PRETTY MUCH THE SAME so dont worry this is still the same beeous albeit a BETTER AND IMPROVED BEEPUS. thank You to my dear fans who waited patently for updates. (also do not worry the beepus related content i teased in the last chapter pre revamp is still in the works and hopefully to begin this year so stay tooned )

if you're new here hi none of this matters to you. so here is the fic

4/5/2022: IT IS 5th anniversye now holy crap. we are still updating . also check my profile for that mentioned Other Beepus Content be cause it is real now (The Tragic Tale Of the Super Bonus Universe) and hopefully will rock your socks off if you let it

prologue: cleaning out kame house

master roshi wokeup one day. "boy could i go for a good magazine if you know what i mean wink" he said. he got up and looked around. they were all missing! "what is an old man to do now" he asked himself.

"maybe you should clean up" said turtle.

and so hedid. he found his magazines, food, and trash. kame house was now cleaner than ever. but he opened one of his pantrys to see what looked like a YELLOW BEERUS!

"HOLY SHIT" yelled master roshi. he will never ride nimbus again

the yellow beerus was sleeping, its tiny and frail body looking like if it moved a bit it would snap like a twig. he was about up to krillin's waist height, and had a puke green outfit. a dangerous aura surrounded him. master roshi left kame house.

the yellow beerus woke up. it made a horrible screeching noise. it stole everything in the pantry and ran out like a horrible goblin. it blew up turtle.

a sit looked around the island, it saw a ghost-like creature and went over to it. "i am your faithful yokai butler, WHISper. said the ghost. "i will guide you through thick and thin. you mayy not really be a god of destruction or a god for that matter but we gotta find a way to beat up beerus and take his spot. so we have to train and get buff"

the false god nodded. it spoke for the first time in its life, its voice sounding not unlike scratch adventure of sonic the hedgehog. "but what is my name" he yelled.

"youre name is... lard beepis. now lets go. times wasting"