chapter 6: a trivial era

WHISper and lard beepus sat silently, the cold namek wind audible from inside the dark cave. in beepus' hand, he held the capsule yamcha had thrown to him in his last moments, the shock of the ordeal permeating within the two survivors.

"i cant believe yamcha is dead..." whispered WHISper. "he sacrificed himself so that we could get away, and now all we have to remember him by is this tiny capsule. ...can something so small and seemingly insignificant truly contain millions of lost memories, torn apart by the ever so cruel force that is fate? or is it nothing but an empty husk, shed by a once living spirit that has been reduced to ash?"

there was silence.

"DID YOU TRY LOOKING INSIDE OF IT"

"oh no i didnt let me see" WHISper tossed the capsule and out came A TIME MACHINE! "he told us to use this... it must be his time machine"

laard beeepus hopped inside of it. "WELL LETS USE IT. HE GAVE US A MISSION AND WE ARE GONNA FOLLOW IT THROUGH!"

WHISper appeared thoughtful for a moment, before nodding enthusiastically. "you're right beepus! we must continue his legacy... and save all of time!"

beepus looked at the controls. there were so many! he saw coordinates and numbers everywhere! he pressed the most recent one, and the time machine lid began to close.

"WAIT FOR ME" shouted WHISper. he quickly floated in, and soon, the time machine had vanished.

goku, gohan, and piccolo all found themselves being hassled by some complete nobody kid in the middle of a forest. he circled around them like a very excited shark. "woah omg i have seen NOBODY else come around here in a long time except BROLY... you people look COOL and also buff." his tail twitched "GUESS WHAT my greatest dream is to become BUFF as well!" he finally calmed a bit. "anyway who are you people and what are you doing at my house"

goku replied "hey! im son goku! this is my son gohan and my friend pi-"

"-yeah, uh, dont push it buddy." interrupted piccolo

"...my rival/friend piccolo! we were looking for someone, but then we stumbled across you!"

"actually, we found broly which lead us over here." corrected piccolo before turning to glare at goku. "DONT make us follow broly ever again."

gohan chimed in saying "i dont know, i mean i guess this wasnt what we were looking for but we definitely found… uhhh… something," he didnt specify, but piccolo and goku knew he was referring to the time travelling elephant in the room.

oblivious to their concerns, the purple haired child smiled and moved on "well my name is Gorg..." he said his name with a tone of heavy finality. he ran over to the time machine and pulled some raw fish out of it. then, he cooked it with a ki blast. "help urselves LOL" goku proceeded to do that immediately

gohan decided to ask the question nobody else was exactly sure how to ask (granted they had many questions but you learn some you lose some.) "...so uh, gorg-"

"Gorg..." corrected Gorg... everyone just kind of didnt speak for like a full minute like a bunch of freakds.

"...anyway, uh, Gorg... we kind of noticed something interesting here and we wanted to-"

piccolo cut someone off for the second time in the past half hour. "where did you get that time machine." he asked bluntly.

"(...does he even know thats what it is?-)"

Gorg...'s face lit up. "OH THANK YOU I WAS WAITING FOR SOMEONE TO ASK ME ABOUT THAT anyway my dad gun sohan found me in that one day. its pretty cool and i use it to pull pranks on people in the past. its really cool"

the three z fighters briefly took the time to consider the horrifying implications of what affect constantly time travelling for no reason would have on time, given that trunks only did it like twice and that still entirely changed the course of history but then decided to simply not think about this further.

"hmm... one of our friends has a time machine that looks just like that! do you know where your dad got it?" said goku

"no rofl"

"well that was my only idea. sorry guys"

piccolo groaned. "this detour has been INCREDIBLY pointless. just putting that out here"

"sorry. would you all like to hear about my dad?" asked Gorg...

"not. really-"

an ominous breeze fell across an abandoned city clearing, taking tiny peices of rubble along with it. thunder and rain crashed down, providing the only light in the dark sky. dead grass that had grown in the cracks of the streets was torn from its roots, sidewalks being drowned by the heavy downpour. this was the eventual fate of all timelines, most who lived it figured.

underneath the patio of a long deserted building, a half saiyan with lavender hair and his messily cobbled together group of survivors of this horrible future stood at their fire, weakly flickering in the night.

"i still cant believe our old camp got destroyed by hyper dark oolong..." said one of the survivors, a blue anthro cat.

another, a not half saiyan with short rediculous hair replied, rolling his eyes. "well if SOMEONE hadnt tried to preform some weird fucking stunt involving a bungee cord and an axe we wouldn't BE in this situation right now." he gave a very pointed glance towards jeice the second (aka new jeice) who was sitting across from him.

"pssh," new jeice stood up standing up. "you're gonna act like you were any better during that, mate? you and you're whole 'saiyan pride' shtick nearly got us all killed dead."

the other man also stood up. "of COURSE you wouldn't get it. you literally used to be one of frieza's soldiers- i don't know why any of these jackasses even let you be in this shitty makeshift band of lunatics!"

new jeice lashed forward. "that was a DIFFERENT BLOODY PERSON! just because the OLD jeice was with frieza doesn't mean i'm with 'im!"

before the argument could escalate any further, the purple haired guy stepped in. "could you guys please stop getting into it for at least a little while? yamcha's still not back and honestly its starting to get pretty worrying.

both of the arguing parties said "fucking centrist" at the same time in response.

"wh-!?"

the saiyan scoffed, unwrapping his tail from his torso. "trunks. yamcha was the only decent person in this stupid squad. and he's off in another timeline, being hunted down by the shadow of time, probably getting himself KILLED. meanwhile back here you have THESE lunatics who can't even keep THEMSELVES alive. if you were actually a good leader you'd pay attention to the kinds of people you're bringing into our CAMP! because these people just SUCK!"

"oh RIGHT back at YOU, oleracea! ya' don't even like anyone here!" snapped new jeice, not even waiting for trunks to speak.

the last of the survivors, an indescribable weirdo (who probably had pink hair and a crown) suddenly stepped into the center of the camp (straight into the fire) and took a deep breath. "I DO NOT have ANYTHING constructive to say about this. JUST thought i'd LET YOU GUYS know"

the anthro cat, who'd previously been about to step in herself, spoke. "...thanks nart"

"NO"

quickly moving on, the cat said "look, maybe yamcha's at our old camp…? i mean, the time machine would reappear in the same place it left, wouldnt it?"

trunks replied after a bit of hesitation, downtroddenly. "our old camp was already destroyed by the time he left, belle…"

"damn really? i must be losing track of time BAD wow"

"THATS THE DARK FUTURE FOR YOU" nart concluded

before any further 'conversation' could take place, TRUNKS' TIME MACHINE FINALLY APPEARED! he breathed a sigh of relief.

however, when the hatch opened, what the survivors saw was not yamcha... BUT LARD BESPSUSAAAAA AND WHISper!

all of the people at the campsite stared in silence. "who... who is this. trunks do you know who this is" said oleracea.

at first trunks was just as confused as the rest of them... but then he realized who they were! he walked over to the not yet god of destruction and his associate. "you must be the foretold savior of time... lead... beepbeep?"

beepus simply shook his head 'no', spun around and struck a cool pose. "I AM LARD BEEPUS. THIS IS MY TRUSTY ASSISTANT, WHISper. I LIKE TO SCREAM"