Good to You

by whitemaigexxvii

[AU] Jessica Sherawat: the girlfriend. Jill Valentine: the best friend. The lines were set but it was still breached and pain is just around the corner. RATED M. [JillxChrisxJessica]

2. Chapter I

GOOD TO YOU

•xoxoxo•

Disclaimer: Resident Evil CAPCOM | Plot © whitemaigexxvii | Song © 투에니원

Summary: [AU] Jessica Sherawat: the girlfriend. Jill Valentine: the best friend. The lines were set but it was still breached and pain is just around the corner. RATED M. Valenfield / Sherafield

•xoxoxo•

Author's Note: Gosh, this wasn't supposed to take long! I was out of commission for a week and bed rest was inevitable. Your awesome reviews helped me recover quickly, though! I'm so glad I finally finished it! Albeit I can't say I'm satisfied with what happened. However, that's for you people to decide. A huge thank you to all those wonderful people who took the time to tell me what they think. It makes the whole 'flu' ordeal bearable. Also, I want to thank those who followed and added the story to their alert list. I can't thank you enough, guys! I wasn't really expecting much but you guys blew me! Okay, enough with my rants. Enjoy!

Warning: This is Rated M for a reason, which means LEMON ahead, guys! Read at your own risk.

•xoxoxo•

CHAPTER I

Because of you

I sank in a deep sadness

I swallow these tears

By myself

•xoxoxo•

CHRIS REDFIELD greeted the day with a whooping headache and an overwhelming urge to throw up all the food he had ingested yesterday to the floor, making things even worse for him. He can't believe he turned back to the old habits he tried so hard to leave behind with just a snap of a finger. It's not like he wanted to, not after all the effort he invested into stopping, but it was all he could think of at that time to forget his heartbreaking problem. Even for just a night.

He remembered being mad. Well, that's an understatement. He was livid. So, in place of murdering someone, Chris thought it'll be for the best if he sought comfort with a couple bottles of beer, instead.

At first, Chris felt ecstatic. He experienced unadulterated bliss when he took the very first sip he had in ages. He used to drink a lot back then until he received a beating from his best friend, all the while yelling at him that it'll catch up to him in the future. Chris knows that but he just can't find it him stop in the past. Fortunately he eventually did, deciding that it's easier than having that annoying woman whine in his ears every freaking second of his life. That applies with his smoking habits, too. He hasn't completely stopped but he was on his way. He fears that once she finds out about this, she'll never let him live it down.

Choosing not to dwell about those thoughts, Chris turned to his side—away from the offending sunlight piercing his eyes—and decided to laze around for a few more minutes until his headache becomes a little bearable for him to move around. He briefly wondered what time it was but dismissed it quickly. He doesn't feel like going anywhere today so he could use the time to think about facing his problems. He can't run from it all the time. It's just not his style to do that. However, the hurt and humiliation he felt begs to differ.

I guess I'll have to worry about that later.

Finally opening his eyes, he pondered for a second before surveying the area. His eyes met white walls instead of mint green. It took him a few seconds before the first pangs of panic gnawed at him. He bolted up, cursing when the world spun around him and a stabbing pain raked his brain, causing him to cradle his head and pinch his temples. God, this is what he hates about drowning in liquor. At first you'll feel so good—like you're floating and wouldn't give shit about what happens around you—until you're not, that is.

Where the hell am I?

When things finally calmed down a little, the first thing he had in mind was to check his clothes. Though not wearing the clothes last night, it brought him a little comfort to find out that he was dressed in a plain white T-shirt and boxers. It was weird but Chris chose to divert his mind into examining his surroundings since it was his top priority to know where the hell he is.

The room was simple yet spacious. There's a closet across the queen-sized bed and a nightstand. He's guessing that he's inside a guest room, noting that there isn't a single decoration inside the room. No pictures, nothing. The sheets of the bed seemed fresh, too. Although, Chris thought that there's something wrong with the whole set-up. He just can't poke his finger at it. There's also something about the air that he can't recognize.

He pulled the sheets aside and stood up. He stopped when something caught his peripheral vision. He turned to look at it and saw a note on top of the night stand, together with a bundle of keys. Taking the note, he smiled. He could recognize the handwriting from everywhere and relief instantly flooded his whole being.

Christy,

I figured you'll be up by noon. I have an exam today and I won't be coming home until later but I made something for you to eat. It's in the fridge. I think you're old enough to know how to reheat. Make sure to lock the doors when you leave. I don't want my house to be looted.

-Sandwich

Chris chuckled. He turned the note and rolled his eyes when he saw something more was written on it. He expected that much.

PS. You're an inconsiderate jerk and I know that so I'll give you a break but after beating the shit outta you. I suggest you get out of my property before then.

When he reached the end, he re-read it for a few more times before bursting into a fit of laughter. The note seemed simple enough. Chris can't help but imagine her saying the words with a very pissed off expression on her face while she whines. Chris will never admit it out loud, but he kind of finds her cute when she complains. Too bad, she's too mature to whine all the time. He loves to meddle with her temper even as kids. They banter all the time. They have their fair share of fights. And every time, brings him undescribed amusement whenever she reacts. It flatters him that only he can have such effects on his overly calm best friend. Not many can elicit agitation in that well-preserved demeanor, dear.

How he missed his best friend: The Great Jill Valentine.

He found his jeans neatly folded, together with his shirt, inside the closet. He changed into his jeans before quickly shoving the note inside. Another thing that Chris will never admit out loud is that he always keeps things she had her handwritings in; especially the ones with his name on it. It's a weird thing to do but Chris often finds peace when doing it. He felt like he never got much time to be with her now that she's so busy with college. Chris took military training a few years back and is now working in a special division at their police department while Jill chose to continue with her studies and get a degree and that took a big chunk out her time. They grew up together and it feels awfully weird when she's not around to pester him about anything. So, keeping things that defines her is the only thing that makes him feel like she's still there.

Claire misses her a lot, too. Though his younger sister is also in college, she can still have some free time to ask about Jill. Like him, Claire is also extremely close with the elder woman. She looks up to her a sister she never had.

He smiled at the fond memories. He's still wondering why he ended up going to Jill's place, though. Maybe he just needed someone to talk to and she's always his best bet. And maybe he really wanted to see her after putting herself in isolation for almost a month, already. They may argue at the simplest of things but they understand each other in a much deeper angle. Jill also cared so much about him, something that makes him feel unnerved at times. She's just too good to him.

Well, Jill is good to everyone.

Sighing, Chris decided to clean the area—not wanting to face the wrath of Jill's fist—before grabbing something to eat. He started with the sheets and made sure nothing's out of place before grabbing her keys from the nightstand and shoved it inside his already worn jeans. He decided to keep the T-shirt Jill provided since it looked much more decent than what he wore last night. When everything was set, he left the room and went down to the living room. He's been over Jill's place for countless of times already but it still amazed him how she could keep the whole house clean on her own.

The house is simple. It's not too big or too small. It's just the right size for a single person to comfortably live in; two bedrooms including the guest room, a small living room, a kitchen and a bathroom. It's not much but for Jill it was enough. The house was a gift on her 20th birthday. Her parents tend to be very concerned about their only daughter's wellbeing. They want her to feel comfortable so they took it upon themselves to make sure of it.

Chris helped with the renovations they made with it and it made him proud when he saw tears of joy grazing her eyes the moment she saw the house. She definitely loved it.

Passing through the living room, he strode towards the kitchen only to come into a halt when a very familiar buzzing reached his ears. He looked for the source which led him back into the living room and saw that his phone was making the noise.

Big Ass.

He scowled and waited until the ringing stopped. He unlocked his phone and found out that he had 10 missed calls; three from Jill, five from Claire, and two from her. He scoffed and checked his phone for anything else important. He received a text from Jill and opened it the exact moment a call came in, thus making him answer unintentionally. He mentally cursed his luck and seeing as to how there's no other choice but to face the inevitable, he pushed the phone to his ear.

"Yes?" He answered, nonchalant. He's so busy calming his impulsive nature down to notice an annoyed groan from the other line.

"Care to explain why you stayed over at Jill's for the night—drunk out of your mind—without even telling me?"

The nerve of this woman! Chris wanted nothing more than to lash out and assault her verbally at that moment but instead, he swallowed the urge and dropped to the couch at the sudden onslaught of exhaustion. He knew this time would come. He regretted the fact that he did not followed his musings earlier to come up with a plan for handling the problem. All Chris ever wanted was to rest his tired mind for the day before he's forced to come back to reality. He just never expected it to come too soon. He knows he could not turn back now but he's still torn between choosing to stay or leave. Well, anyone in their right mind would deliberately choose the latter. His pride and ego were tested so why would he choose to stay?

Thoughts of what he found out came back to haunt him. What would he do now? He had to choose and fast. Will he cut himself out or stay? Whatever his decision might be, he knows things will never be the same. He'll never be the same.

Can I let her leave just like that?

Before Chris could ever decide, another idea popped inside his mind. For a moment, he was struck speechless on how sinister the idea was but he was able to recover quickly, a devious smirk plastered on his face. The answer to his problems finally came and the righteous piece of him begged to differ but this woman had it coming. He never wanted to do what he's about to do. However, he can't let things go unanswered. The lesson must be learned.

He chose his words carefully. If he wanted this newly found plan to go smoothly, he'll just have to bear with the agony for a few more weeks. "Yeah, I'm sorry, Jessica. I guess I was too wasted to remember." He replied as normal as he could in between gritted teeth. He still can't believe he invested a lot in a wrong person.

There was an exasperated gasp from the other line. "Damn right, you are! And of all places, why at Jill's? Tell me one good reason not to break your nose!"

Chris rolled his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. He's so close to breaking something within arm's reach. The fact that his hang-over isn't entirely gone made the situation all the more irritating. He figured she already talked to Jill or Claire about where he is for her to know a lot. 'How': is the question. "Calm down, Jessica. I just wind up coming over Jill's since I haven't seen her for almost a month now. I just want to check on her, okay?"

He can already see her rolling her eyes. "Drunk? Don't lie to me!"

"I had loads on my mind. Give me a break." He countered. He had a feeling she's going to rant soon.

"Chris, you're unbelievable! If you have told me, I'd let you do what you want and even drink with you. You shouldn't have come to Jill's place. Best friend or not, you know I don't trust that woman. Who knows what happened!"

Chris is well aware that Jessica never liked Jill but there was something about her statement that ticked him off, nearly shoving him over the edge. He's not dumb to see what direction Jessica is pointing at. Jill is, for one, not insane to do what Jessica accused her of. He'd known Jill since forever and he knows that she's a woman with respect. She's not one to just sleep with her best friend or anyone she's not having an intimate relationship with. Heck, last time he checked, she admitted that she's still a virgin. And he believes her. So, hearing other people think otherwise—and being so certain about it—makes his blood boil.

Feeling the need to defend his best friend, he firmly stated. "Wait a minute. Jill is not like that." He stressed, his hand clenching his phone in an unbelievable force.

"So? You're on her side?"

"Will you stop it, Jessica? I'm siding with no one. You don't like her, I get that. But stop telling shit about her." He retorted as he tried to calm himself down. "We shouldn't even talk about this on the phone."

There was a pause on the other line before he heard a heavy sign. "Whatever, Chris. That's so like you."

Chris thanked all gods in heaven when she ended the call. He rested his head on the sofa and closed his eyes, thinking about the conversation with his girlfriend. It's so easy to be blind about the flaws of others when you're in love. Now that he knew about what Jessica has been doing behind his back, he couldn't help but hate himself. Why, pray tell, must he always fall for the wrong and bitchy person? He never really cared about Jessica's attitude back then but the way she talked about Jill seemed to be his wake up call. He just wants his plan to be played into action and be over with it.

Standing up, he dragged himself towards the kitchen for—he guessed—lunch and black coffee albeit he never made it far when his head throbbed painfully. He tightly closed his eyes, waiting for his headache to ease, only to instantly open his eyes when images started to flood in. Although the memories were vague and didn't make much sense, the absurdity of it shocked him to the core.

A room. Frantic bodies moving in tune with each other. Unbearable—but at the same time, pleasurable—heat.

Jill…

He shook his head.

No. Something like that will never happen.

He wanted nothing but to laugh and be alarmed at the same time. As much as the vague vision screamed the word 'absurd', Chris couldn't chase the thought that somehow it felt so real. Like, it actually happened. Maybe it was the alcohol or the fact that he's just exhausted out of his mind. Yeah, it has got to be the exhaustion and stress.

Opening the fridge, he rummaged for his lunch and settled in for the afternoon.

•xoxoxo•

They all say you're a bad boy

I honestly liked you

It felt right

But they were right

•xoxoxo•

SHE STOOD there, for how long? She can't remember. All she knew was the impending doom she'll embrace once she steps inside that door. Jill Valentine, for the first time in her life, is lost and confused, torn between doing and feeling what's right. As her heart broke, she readied her fist to knock but couldn't find the will to continue. She's stuck and alone with the guilt. She needed someone to talk to and she's grateful she have one in mind. However, she's not so sure if she's ready to let it all out.

Is she really ready?

Will they judge her? Or will they understand the risks she had to take just to feel the happiness she deprived herself from because of all those years denying?

She felt her resolve thawing together with her retracting hand. She can't do it. Not yet, anyway. Stepping away from the door, she was ready to leave when the door swung open and she was totally caught off guard when arms wrapped around her neck into a suffocating hug. It took her a few seconds to recover and when she did, she returned the gesture.

"Jill!" The person exclaimed and pulled away from the hug to look at her.

"Hey, Rebecca!" Jill greeted as she took in the new look of her friend. Weeks spent away from her didn't change her much. She's still a few inches shorter, innocence still shining in those azure pools, and her hair still at the same length. Physically, nothing has changed much. However, the change in her friend's demeanor was what piqued Jill's interest. Rebecca's perkier and those eyes told her stories of bliss and content. The glow emanating from her smile consumed Jill's conscience with guilt. She can't bear ruining this kind of happiness with her own problems.

Rebecca Chambers became her classmate back in middle school even if she was a few years younger. Rebecca was a genius that's why she excelled and graduated in college at the age of eighteen and focused in the world of medicine. At the age of twenty, Rebecca became the head doctor of Raccoon City Hospital. Although they were both busy managing their lives, they kept in touch whenever possible and Jill has just received news that her friend is about to get married to her long-time boyfriend, Billy Coen.

"God, Jill. I was watching you from upstairs. You were standing there for, like, ten minutes!" Rebecca stated all the while flailing her arms in emphasis.

This made Jill laugh. She now realized how much she's been burying herself with college that she rarely had the time to be with the people she cared about. She misses her family and her friends. Heck, she missed this woman! Rebecca has always been a little sister in her eyes. Even with a big brain, Rebecca sometimes finds herself in situations that requires more than that and it was Jill who comes to her aid until Billy came along. "I'm sorry, Becca. I wasn't so sure if I should bother you. You know, with your engagement and all that." She said, teasing evident in her tone and the younger woman picked up on it.

"Oh, Jill, stop it!" Rebecca giggled before playfully swatting her arm. "Come on. Let's have some coffee or something."

Both women entered the humble abode. It's been a long time since she stepped inside that house and the nostalgia already assaulted her. It was nice to finally be out of your own house and seeing another environment. She could really use this kind of break.

"Make yourself at home." Rebecca called out before disappearing into the kitchen.

Jill made herself comfortable on the couch as her eyes journeyed along the walls of her friend's living room. It was painted with a cool hue of blue and picture frames were organized on the walls and also on shelves but one particular picture caught her eyes, which made her leave the confines of the couch and strolled her way to it.

It was a picture of them when they were kids. On the picture were Rebecca, Claire, Chris, Polly, Moira, other childhood friends, and herself. It was like a wacky class picture. The grinning faces of their younger counterparts brought a smile to her face. She believed the picture was taken at Polly's birthday party, and as tradition the Redfield and Valentine were there. Jill invited Rebecca to come with her. The younger woman was really shy when they were kids but Jill was glad Rebecca was able to get in the loop and establish a strong bond of friendship with her friends.

She looked at the photo, longingly. They were all so young. The cruel world didn't have the chance to invade their naïve minds until a few years later. They were full of smiles and not a slight of worry would ever mar their faces. Those were the times she would never be able to come back to. She could only look back. How she wished she'll be able to turn back time.

That's her current situation when Rebecca walked in with a tray of snacks and two glasses of coffee. "Well, do you miss it? Those were good memories we had back there." She commented and settled the tray on top of the coffee table before joining her in her journey back to the past.

Jill nodded with a smile. "It was, Becca." She answered and placed the frame back on the shelf.

"Yeah, it's still hard to believe that you and Chris were pulling each other's hairs when that photo was taken."

"What do you expect from that bully?"

The both of them released a merry laugh. Jill looked at the picture once more. She remembered that moment vividly. She and Chris were arguing about the last piece of cake. Chris eats fast so he finished his slice in just a few seconds. It just so happened that Jill was only about to get her slice and it was, unfortunately, the last slice. Chris took it upon himself to snatch said slice and everything happened so fast after that. Before they knew what was happening, the two of them were already in a fight. It was an everyday occurrence so the adults just watched and let them settle the fight on their own. They were only able to stop when Rebecca's mother called for a group picture. They both ended up bear-hugging—cheek to cheek, arms wound tightly around each other while flashing a toothy grin—just in time when the camera clicked.

"I never got a copy of this."

"Oh, I see. I guess Mom forgot to develop multiple copies. You know her." Rebecca replied with a chuckle. "Well, I'll have it scanned and email it to you later."

Jill nodded and looked at the picture one last time before the both of them made their way to the sofa. She reached for the coffee Rebecca made for her and took a sip. She sighed as she felt the hot liquid cascade down her throat, warming her stomach. Rebecca did the same. They sat across each other in silence as they reveled in the comforting warmth of the coffee until Jill heard a frustrated sigh from her friend.

"Jill, are you going to talk or am I going to force it out of you?" Rebecca asked, sending her a pointed look which took her by surprise.

"Becca, I—

"Jill, I've been watching you and you have this forlorn look on your face, as if you're carrying a boulder of problems or something. I watched you hesitate to knock on my door earlier. What's the matter?" Rebecca explained, this time in a very concerned tone.

Jill knew that Rebecca will see right through her. And it's true that she sought for her advice but now that the moment has presented itself, tongue-tied would be a horrible understatement. She swallowed thickly, arranging the words inside her head in a manner that would make her friend understand and know what she's going through. She needs to get it over with so she'll be able to breathe easier.

"Jill?" Rebecca called out when silence met her.

Jill looked anywhere but her, a deep frown on her face and her hands formed fists on her lap. When she finally found the courage to face the younger woman, she almost broke down but held her tears in. This is it, the moment of truth.

"I love him, Becca." She said in a whisper that Rebecca strained her ears to hear every word. And when she did, Jill saw a confused look on her face before realization sunk in, making her friend's jaw drop.

When Rebecca did not reply, Jill kept her silence. She thought that her friend needed the time to digest the reality of the confession. If things were different, Rebecca would've jumped up from her seat to envelop her in a hug until she squeezed the air out of her lungs but when she remained seated and in shock, that's when Jill knew that she understood. Rebecca understood her sadness.

"Oh, Jill." Rebecca pushed herself off her seat and sat beside her, enveloping her in a comforting embrace. "Does he know?" She asked as she pulled away from the embrace and took Jill's hand in her own.

Jill shook her head.

"I see."

Drawing in a shaky breath, Jill steeled her resolve. "That's only a part of what happened."

"What do you mean?" Rebecca asked, slowly, as if trying to prepare herself for the worst.

Jill closed her eyes and remembered the night where she knew she'll never be the same again.

•xoxoxo•

You melt me sweetly

You lied to me lightly

•xoxoxo•

FLASHBACK

COMPLETELY BEWILDERED, I stared at his handsome face as he stared back down at me; that dangerous glint in his mesmerizing brown eyes sending shivers up and down my spine. I can feel the warmth of his breath against my neck and his words playing like a stupid mantra inside my head.

"Believe me, Jill. I know."

It was a promise. Something that I'm bound to find out whether I liked it to or not. The sheer certainty of his words made my insides churn with need. I looked away, rejecting the weakness I'm slowly delving in. I felt his free hand roam, teasingly, on the taut skin of my abdomen, never going higher or lower. My mind keeps telling me to break free, that regret is the only path I'll walk into once I let things go the way they're headed. I know this but I'm too tired to do anything. His touches burn my skin, melt my heart, and corrupt my soul.

"Chris, please." I don't know what I was pleading for. For him to stop or to continue, I can't say. I was torn between both sides.

His strong legs straddled my hips as he leaned down to lick and nip on my neck once more. I gasped, breath labored, as I squirmed against his hold. He vigorously sucked on my pulse that I momentarily lost my mind to the onslaught of pleasure. It was too much. I had to do something—anything—to sate the ache I feel below. When his relentless assault finally ceased, our eyes locked in a hypnotizing haze, that's when I knew that he was finally looking at me. It was me inside those hazel eyes. For the very first time, he was looking at me not as his best friend, his constant enemy, and sister but as a woman and right then and there, the least bit of refusal I had in me dissolved to nothingness. Before I knew it, I was finally letting go.

Letting go of my pride.

Letting his dominance get ahold of my submission.

"Jill," he whispered, coaxing my heart to fall for him even deeper. He released my hands, allowing me to wrap them around his neck. For once, no matter what the consequences might be, I will be true to myself. It's selfish and stupid but it's a risk I'm willing to take.

"Yes?" I asked, running my hands through his soft hair.

"Let me love you."

Those words would've made my heart swell with happiness but instead it was pierced with agony until all I wanted to do was cry. If only his words were true. If only the things happening right now are not some selfish decisions I made for myself because I was too weak to fight. I was too pathetic to fight this crushing emotion I have not yet fully understood.

Managing a small smile, I nodded before taking a deep breath.

This is it. Call me crazy but I really want to be with him. I want to be a woman with him. If I had to pretend, I'd do it if it means I'll be with him tonight. At least giving him myself is the only thing I think I'd be doing right in this lifetime.

He smiled back as I felt his calloused hand caress my cheek. It was a very sweet gesture and it made my heart skip a beat. Yes, pretending would make things bearable, somehow.

I closed my eyes, all the while pulling him closer to me until our lips touched for the second time. I think I'll never get used to feeling his lips against mine. The electrifying sensation flooded my senses that I almost failed to register his warm hands hiking my top, exposing my stomach. I moaned in our kiss and he took that opportunity to slip his tongue inside my mouth. As our tongues danced in a fiery battle, I slipped my hand inside his shirt, feeling every flex of his muscles under my touch. I memorized every dip and feel of his manly skin with the tip of my fingers. This is Chris now. I want to remember every detail of his body. I want to remember this feeling even if they'll become just that. A bittersweet remembrance of a palpable mistake.

When our lungs finally screamed for air, we reluctantly pulled away from the numbing sensation of our kiss; both panting for air. As I looked into those eyes, my need for him intensified. My fingers moved on their own accord and reached for the hem of his shirt and in seconds the fabric was tossed across the room. My eyes hungrily roamed his chest together with my hands. That uncomfortable feeling between my legs came back with a vengeance at just the sight of him topless. I never knew he could do something like this to me.

"Like what you see?" He asked, a cocky smirk on his lips.

I felt my cheeks flare and I looked away to hide my embarrassment. I heard him chuckle before kissing my cheek. "You are so cute, Jilly." He teased and I sent him a withering glare. He burrowed his face against my chest in a gesture so affectionate, it made my heart skip yet another beat. I cradled his head as my fingers played with the strands of his hair.

We fell into a tranquil silence; the only sound I could hear was his raged breathing mixed with the erratic drumming of my heart. I closed my eyes and indulged myself with his manly scent as it shrouds my senses with its calming spell. To be this close to him, to be able to feel him, I never knew that I ached so much for those things. I ache to be with him.

I felt him move, my eyes instantly met his; something devious brewing beneath his alluring eyes. And just like that, the tension sparked between us once more. Every numbing need coming back to me in waves.

"You're so cute I want to eat you."

I didn't have the time to voice out anything since Chris crushed my lips with his in a needy pace before sloppily shoving his tongue inside my mouth. The agile muscle played with mine, coaxing it to enter his cave. I obliged only to lose my mind when he sucked on my tongue with unrivaled zest. I held onto him for dear life as my back arched, my toes curling with this insane pleasure.

Chris pulled away only to remove the offending fabric covering my upper body. The pad of his hands making contact with my bare skin was so mind-boggling; all I could do was moan for him to continue. I want him to touch me. I want him to touch places no one has ever touched before. I want to feel his body moving against mine with all the passion he could muster. As lewd sounds continuously escaped my throat, Chris pushed me further into the center of the bed. His lips hungrily ravaged my neck and chest while his hands roamed to my pajama-clothed thighs and gently parted it just so he could position himself between my legs.

The change of position made me feel more of him; especially his mind-numbing erection pressing against my crotch. I gasped when he started rubbing his clothed manhood against my moistening core, further escalating the heat surrounding us.

"Oh, Chris." Breathlessly, I followed the rocking of his hips and the friction we're creating down there is driving me crazy. The more seconds tick by, the more desperate I become. I want to feel his skin as he work wonders with mine. So, without actually thinking, my nimble fingers flew to his jeans and fumbled to remove his belt but Chris's hands stopped me before I could even finish my job.

"Not so fast, Miss Valentine." He disapprovingly shook his head, his smirk obviously taunting me. Seriously, how could he deny me something I desperately craved even at a time like this? I want to punch his face but I'm too caught up with the arousing rhythm of his hips to even care. I know what he's doing. He wants me to beg but I refuse to yield just yet. I have to get what I want first and that is to feel him in my hand.

Unfortunately, before I can play my thoughts into actions, he pinned my hands above my head with a hand and pulled the drawstring of my pajama with the other. My breath hitched when he removed said fabric in one swift motion, leaving me in nothing but my underwear. "You'll have your turn, my lovely sandwich." His husky voice made my core twitch as I released a pained moan. This man is a fucking tease! I don't know how long I can endure this before I completely lose my mind and rape him myself. His name continuously spilled from my lips as I grew more and more light-headed.

An invisible force shot through my whole body, wreaking havoc in my system, when fingers dipped into my underwear and provoked something so mouth-watering between my legs. His feather-like touches traced my moist slit as a groan escaped his throat. He's breathing hard against my cheek now. "God, Jill, you're so wet. Do you want me that much?"

"S-Shut up, Chris. Just—oh, god!" I involuntarily exclaimed when his thick finger slid inside my hole. Now my mind felt like it's in the process of being fried. He didn't even give me the time to adjust when he pumped his finger in and out while his thumb rubbed what I know as my clitoris.

This is the first time in my whole existence to feel something like this. I've never entertained the thought of having sex, let alone masturbation, before. Everything that's happening right now is new to me so the barrage of sensations is killing my mind and body. It was too much but at the same time, I can't stop myself from wanting more. His finger raped my insides, curling and drilling, unrelenting and unforgiving. My body rolled in spasms, I was scared… scared that my body is moving on its own. When his finger pushed forward, my hips will meet the penetration. Something coiled inside my gut which was so close to snapping.

Bliss, I can almost taste it in my mouth.

Just a few more thrusts and I'll see heaven.

My eyes shot open, my body drowned in disappointment, as a very frustrated growl rumbled from my throat. A sadistic laugh made its way to my ears and I want to punch something if only his strong hand will let me. The bastard deemed it amusing to see me going crazy for not reaching orgasm.

"Not yet, babe. I can't have you coming without me, can I?"

I sent him a glare, not finding the situation any less than infuriating. "Goddamn it, Christopher! I swear, if you—

"Beg," The commanding tone in his voice mixed with the devious glimmer in his eyes frightened and aroused me. He looks so sexy—so appetizing—I just gawked at him without finding the words to say.

The way his eyes bore into mine made my world stop as I hissed when he lifts his hand and sucked on a finger covered with my essence. I watched intently as he licked and sucked that finger. That simple action was enough to make my head go blank as the stifling arousal consumed all of me. With hooded eyes, I focused on his hand while he removed the remaining fabric on my body, exposing my wholeness for his eyes to feast on. As he stood on his knees, eyes hungrily taking in all of me, I couldn't help the urge of pushing him away and covering what was exposed. I want to know what he thinks of me. What if he didn't like some particular parts of my body? What if I can't satisfy his needs? What if I'm not good enough for him? I don't think I could take that kind of rejection; especially coming from him.

When he stayed motionless, my anxiety grew into fear. I looked away and covered my chest with my arms. I can't do this. I'm not good enough.

I felt his hand cup my cheek and gently coaxed me to look at him. What I saw in those eyes knocked the air out of my lungs.

Adoration.

"Don't hide from me." He whispered, finally capturing my lips for another breath-taking kiss. It was gentle and very sweet. "You're so..." Chris looked at me, there was something in his eyes that I couldn't place but it made me all warm and fuzzy inside. The tone of his voice changed, too; as if he was lulling me to sleep. As a heart-felt chuckle escaped his lips, I wondered to myself. Why have I not realized sooner? Chris was everything I want for a man. A definition of masculinity yet very tender and loving. "I don't know. Words couldn't express how beautiful you are."

I was taken aback. Did he just say what I think he said? I felt my eyes water but I tried my hardest to hold it in. I wouldn't want to ruin such an intimate moment just because I can't control my emotions. Chris has always been too good in drawing reactions that is so out of character for me. Only he could achieve such a feat, even when we were still young. I don't know how he does it, but he does it without fail. Maybe that's what attracted me to him.

He dashed a smile before peppering my chest with sweet kisses. I moaned in delight when his hand took my mound and started massaging while he gave attention to the other with his lips. He sucked on my nipple like a baby and it had my toes curling. The wonders he could achieve with that mouth of his was abysmal, I never wanted him to stop.

I closed my eyes—reveling in his warmth—as I wrapped my arms around him, drawing him closer. "Take me, Chris. Love me. I want it to be you." I said in a hushed tone. My words are what my heart so badly wants to convey. I want it to be with him for no one will be like him. No one will ever replace Chris Redfield.

He pulled away slightly to look me in the eyes. I believe he was searching, finding any doubts or insecurity. I just gave him my sincerest smile and reached out to place a gentle kiss against his forehead, just like how lovers would do it. "I'm sure, Chris. It's got to be you."

He nodded albeit still hesitating. Accepting his approval, my hands began their descent towards his belt, finally feeling his heated flesh against my curious fingertips. His hard abdominal muscles reacting with my slow rhythm as it flexed under my touch. I continuously caressed that part when he moaned in bliss before I finally reached out to finish the job with his pants. Different shades of crimson peppered my face when I saw a huge tent forming there. He must've been enduring all those times just to make me feel so good. Well, then. Even if I'm inexperienced, the feelings and need to make him feel just as good pushed the hesitation away. I pushed his pants down as far as I was able until he helped me disposed it with the rest of our clothes.

When my eyes met with his intimidatingly stiff manhood, I literally forgot how to breathe. I just ogled at it and milked my brain for answers to a very simple question. How the hell is something that big going to fit in me? For a moment, I don't know what to do. An uncomfortable lump formed in my throat but the stress of the revelation was alleviated by his nose nuzzling my cheek. Swallowing my worry, I reached out and wrapped his erection with a trembling hand, afraid that I might hurt him if I grab too hard. A strangled growled was given and I instantly snatched my hand as if burned.

I looked at him with worried eyes. "I'm sorry. Did I hurt you?"

His reply was a chaste kiss. "You have to squeeze a little tighter." He said and his hand enveloped mine, positioning it to where it was before, only this time the grip was indeed a little tighter. Getting the hint, I started to move my hand, slowly pumping it and applying the right pressure with every movement. His hand left mine and wrapped them possessively around my torso as low growls spilled. I felt his erection throbbing with every thrust and I was lost in his pleasure. It's funny how you could control a man when you already have him in your hands. The feeling was so exhilarating. I picked up my pace and Chris tried to silence himself by sinking his teeth on my shoulder. Instead of feeling pain, it morphed into pleasure. My other hand joined in by fondling his sack, making his moans and groans escalate by tenfold.

"Jill," He breathed, tangling his fingers through my hair and pulling on it. "S-Stop. I'm about to…" His guttural moan sent bolts of lightning to course all over my body.

I instantly stopped, understanding what he meant. He sighed and our lips joined once more in a lust-filled kiss. My wits shattered when I felt the tip of his erection trace my slit, covering it with my essence. I never knew I'd be so wet for him, just a huge testament that my body yearned for him. "Oh, Chris!" I exclaimed when the tip rubbed against that very sensitive nub between my legs. I panted as he repeated the motion, making me arc my body against his.

"Are you sure? This is going to hurt." I heard him say somewhere in my pleasure-induced mind. I was still able to register the unadulterated concern lacing through every word, mirroring the glimmer in those enticing hazel eyes. It was a gaze seeking for my permission. He's giving me a chance to change my mind though I've already decided. The pain, the risk, I plan to shoulder all of them. A selfish decision?

I know.

Taking a deep breath, I reached out to caress his cheek while flashing a small, reassuring smile. I want him to know—even if I know he'll never remember—that my body was made only for him, that his claim over me will never be broken. My eyes were focused only on him from the very start. "Yes, I'm ready." I whispered, trying to reach my heart out to him as much as I could. I closed my eyes and waited. The anticipation of finally being one with him is all I could think of.

A scream was ripped out of my throat when he entered swiftly; stretching my folds with his thick length that I'm sure it would inevitably draw blood. Tears formed and I failed to keep them at bay. I could hear Chris whispering sweet words in my ears as his thumb brushed the tears away. Damn, it hurts! But the feeling of his length inside me was distracting enough to make me forget about the pain. Finally, our bodies joined as one. We stayed like that for only god knows how long until the pain was completely washed away and was replaced by an itch that needs sating.

"Chris," I whined, moving my hips. The friction we created made me saw stars. It was more than satisfying. More and more I find myself lusting. I need it. I need him to make me scream. "Move,"

Chris groaned and fortunately obeyed my plea. He moved slowly at first, pulling out until only the head was left inside before slamming back in. My hips buckled as I squirmed. He kept on sliding in and out of me in that very sensual pace, it irked me. I wanted more. I need to feel more. I know for a fact that he was only doing this to tease me and make me beg. And even if it hurts my ego, I guess I'll do just that.

"Faster," I implored, panting for air. "Harder,"

Chris chuckled and covered my breast with his eager mouth as he finally picked up his pace. Erratic moans, the constant bagging of the head board against the wall, and flesh slapping against flesh filled the four corners of the room. His powerful thrusts stripped all the knowledge I have and left me with nothing to do but moan his name like a mantra. Every thrust brought me weaker and weaker as my whole body tighten, my walls clamping tighter around his shaft. His generous pleasuring on my breast and core were enough for me to lose my mind, that familiar coiling building up in tidal waves.

"Jill, you're so tight." He growled low, hitting that spot inside me over and over. By the way his face twisted with unadulterated bliss, I know he was getting close like I am.

We're getting close.

As my body completely succumbed into his touch, my heart was also swept along with it. It was then I finally accepted these feelings I have for him. I love him. I always have. This is the man I loved with all my heart from the very beginning but realized it too late. I was just so scared to admit it and hid behind the mask of his best friend. I was not only lying to him but also to myself. If things were different, would you have loved me instead? Would you rather stay in my arms instead of hers? Would you have looked at me like how you looked at her? Will I ever know the answer to these questions, Chris? Or will I wallow in my agony as I wonder how it would have been if you were mine?

I screamed in pleasure as he continuously hit that sweet, sweet spot inside me. I don't know how long I could hold on before I snap. I'm so close. And with a powerful thrust, I screamed his name and saw white lights exploding behind my eye lids. It took him a few more thrusts before he spilled his warmth inside my womb, with my name leaving his lips, before going limp and covering my body with his; his head resting against my neck, inhaling deeply.

Silence wrapped our exhausted bodies, and it was when I finally realized that it was over. When he wakes, he'll never remember any of this. He'll still look at me the same. He'll still come back to the woman he really loves and he'll leave me behind. Though this had changed everything I came to know, he'll stay ignorant of that change. It still does not change the fact that, in his eyes, I'm still his best friend.

On the other hand, I can never look at him the same. I can never come after him even though I love him. At the very beginning, I knew that it would come down to this. It was my own fault. I was weak. I gave in.

Now I will face pain alone.

Closing my eyes, a tear slipped from my eye, followed by another until I was silently crying. Soon, I'll have to slip away from him, make things look like nothing happened, act like nothing happened. I wrapped my arms around him, drawing him close. I want to remember his touch, his smell, and body because this will probably be the last time I'd do something true to my feelings. And when I leave this embrace, I'll be a different person. I'll have to lie just for his sake and happiness. That's just how things would have to be and I need to live with it.

With my heart aching, I whispered.

"I love you."

•xoxoxo•

Was it a crime to love you?

Why am I the only one in pain?

•xoxoxo•

Author's Note: I'm so thankful I don't have a guy as a best friend! I feel bad for Jill, though. Anyway, please tell me what you think. Constructive criticisms are welcomed with open arms. I really want to know because I was not satisfied with it. Did I do well or did it suck eggs? Sigh. Just to clarify a few things, this will not be the end! I still have a few more chapters so I hope you'll stick with me until the real ending. Okay, I'll end it here since this headache is killing me. See you next time, guys!

•xoxoxo•

Disclaimer: I do not own Resident Evil or any of its characters because CAPCOM owns them! I also do not own the lyrics of the song Good to You, which was featured here. They are owned by YGENTERTAINMENT and 2NE1. [November 3, 2014 | 18:21]