A/N: hello my people! i hope everyone is well :) I know I am;)
So, I've got this here chapter for you all, and I'm posting as way to say thank you! Thank you for reading and thank for reviewing and thank you for following and favoriting! Just a massive clusterfuck of THANK YOU!
Super loud shout out to my bff writing partner in crime, MsWitsEnd!l, who updated earlier today! Seriously, if you're not reading Walls right now, shame on you! It's a (currently)dark, tense, nail-biting and adrenaline filled piece of writing...one that's thought provoking and detailed enough to make you feel as if you're in the story! And hopefully the light is just around the corner, so get over there and read it and give her some love if you wish.
also, I've started a forum we're we can kick around, discussing stories and ideas and what not, if you're so inclined, stop by and say hi;)
Chapter 9: The Lifeline
Emily laid in bed, under the covers and wanted to die. She could hear Katie, Cook, and Freddie talking, about her no doubt, and she wanted to scream. She wiped away a tear that slipped out as she thought about what happened. It's not that she had the attack, oddly enough that wasn't the worst thing, it was that it happened in front of Naomi, of all people.
Naomi, who looked at her like she was a freak.
When all she ever wanted was for Naomi to see her as normal like she used to be in college before her life became a joke. The confident, strong Emily! That's who she wanted Naomi to know, not the Emily she had been turned into by a budding sociopath.
Emily stayed silent and still, listening to her sister and her best mates argue for another couple of minutes before she decided that she needed to face the music. Katie probably already called their dad, who was possibly on his way and Emily groaned loudly at that thought.
Throwing back the covers, she slowly got out of bed, feeling her body ache from being tensed up for so long earlier. She walked quietly to the door and gently eased it open, not wanting to give away the fact that she was up just yet. Emily listened to Cook and Katie.
"I just think we need to give her some space, yeah?" Cook stated in his gruff manner.
"That's the last thing she needs, Cook and you know it." Katie spoke up, just as heatedly as Cook.
"I think it's well past time." Freddie said quietly, as always, trying to be the voice of reason. "It's been long enough, Cook."
Emily closed her eyes and sighed, knowing that they were still talking about her. Taking a deep breath, she opened the door all the way and stepped out into the hall, making her way to the lounge.
"Hey, Emsy." Katie said with a forced cheerfulness, as she saw Emily enter the room. "How ya feeling?"
Emily sat down on the sofa, bringing her knees up to her chest and wrapping her arms around them in her classic protection mode. "A bit sore and tired." She replied to Katie's question. "Listen, I know you're all wor-,"
Katie cut her apology off. "Save it for now, Emsy. We've got about ten minutes before everyone is here, so I thought we'd set the table? I know you're hungry."
Emily didn't say anything, as confusion spun through her mind. Set the table? Why would they set the table? Katie's demeanour was throwing her off balance, which had been shaky even after the nap, and she watched as her friends stood up with Katie and they made their way into the kitchen.
She sighed, resigned to the weirdness, and stood up, intent on following them, when the buzzer sounded on the intercom. "Fucking great." Emily muttered to herself as she went over and pushed the button that allowed her to talk. "Hi, Dad. Come on up." She said automatically.
She didn't wait for a reply, merely hitting the button that would open the lobby door and stepped into the bathroom to splash cold water on her face to wake herself more than she already was. Emily knew her dad was going to be searching for any sign of distress and she didn't want him to worry anymore than he already was.
Emily let the water run before cupping her hands under the faucet, then brought them up, feeling the iciness of it, as it covered her face. She grabbed the hand towel and dried her face and hands, then stared at herself in the mirror and wondered when she would get her shit together.
She looked haggard, she realised, noticing the dark circles under her eyes and the way her hair looked as if she had spent a week sleeping. 'Ugh!' She thought in disgust, running her hands through her red locks, trying her best to tame the bed hair, with no luck before she gave up. "Fuck it." She walked out muttering.
"How are you feeling?"
Emily yelped in surprise as she ran into Naomi, who was waiting in the hallway for the bathroom. She had to cover her mouth to muffle the sound and her other hand flew up to pat her chest, feeling her heart racing. "Fucking hell, announce yourself!" She spat out quietly, but with enough venom for Naomi to realise how angry she was.
"I'm sorry." The blonde whispered as she eyed up Emily wearily, stepping closer to her.
Emily tense up again. "Naomi, I need you to back up, please."
There it was again, the slight vibration in that husky voice. Naomi had heard it earlier but didn't know what it was, but she had a clue now.
Emily was afraid of her, bone deep, she was scared to death of Naomi and she felt like crying.
"Please don't be scared." Naomi found herself begging, wanting to be the one Emily came to when she was troubled, not the one she runs from. "I would never, ever, do anything to hurt you. Don't you know that?"
Naomi stepped back and away from Emily, giving her room to breath, and went into the loo and shut the door, leaving the redhead in the empty hallway. It took a few minutes until the noise from the kitchen filtered to her brain.
Emily heard Effy and Gina laughing at something, along with Katie and Freddie. She wanted to go back to bed because she remembered that Katie had mentioned something about a meeting on the ride home, but she didn't pay it any mind as she was still stuck in the haze of the attack she'd had. With a deep sigh, she made her way into the kitchen to face everyone.
"Hello, love." Gina smiled as she caught the tiny twin trying to sneak into the room. "Is it okay to touch you?" She asked and waited, to her everlasting credit, for a nod from Emily.
She had never felt anything like it in her life when Gina put her arms around her and squeezed gently. This was a mother's hug. This was the hug of a woman who cared about your well being. This was a hug that said, I know you're hurting so what can I do to help? It was a hug that enveloped you in a fluffy bubble and promised to never let anything hurt you.
It was everything that Emily really didn't know she needed, and she cried as she wrapped her arms around the older woman and clung to her.
This is what Naomi found when she stepped into the kitchen behind Emily and smiled as she walked around to start passing out food. Naomi had suggested takeaway, so they stopped and grabbed almost every thing on the menu at the Chinese place up the street, knowing that Emily could put away just as much as Freddie and Cook combined when hunger hit her, so they came loaded with bags of food.
She heard her mum whisper something to Emily as she pulled away from her and watched as Emily smiled shyly, blushing and even though it was totally inappropriate, given the situation, Naomi's stomach fluttered. She brushed the reaction aside because she needed to focus on Emily, so she placed cartons of food on the table and felt good when they all sat around and started to eat.
"So, who's thirsty?" Freddie asked as he stepped back into the room, having been sent to the off-licence whilst Emily was in the bathroom. "I've got Pinot Grigio or…Cider oblivion?"
It didn't take long for everyone to tuck into the food and drink, although they didn't drink too much, knowing the subject that needed to be broached. And to any outsider looking in, it would seem like any normal night, where a bunch of mates gathered for a good, relaxing time. But this wasn't any normal night, and even though everyone joked and laughed, even Emily, there was tension hanging in the air.
A tension that was addressed as soon as Freddie and Cook started cleaning the table and tossing trash when Effy cleared her throat to get everyone's attention.
"We need to talk about what happened today, Emily."
Emily swallowed thickly, feeling every eye on her. "It was nothing, I-,"
"Bullshit." Naomi said quietly, cutting off the younger twin's excuse and earning a glare from her, but she was determined to say her piece. "Something set you off, and we need to deal with it. I-I…I think I know what, but I need you to explain."
Emily waited as her heart beat frantically in her chest. She didn't know how to respond, didn't know what to say, because how do you explain that for a long time you allowed someone, someone who claimed to love you, to mentally and physically abuse you? It's not like you could slip it into casual conversation over coffee! It's something you keep hidden so people don't look at you like a freak.
"Emily," Effy spoke softly, placing a hand over Emily's, "this is as important to the show as it is for you."
Emily glanced up at Effy, then looked at Naomi, taking in the concerned looks, and then over at Katie, who looked sad. "What did you tell them?" She asked Katie, too tired to be angry. Usually, this was something that Emily chose to ignore, and never allowed Katie or their dad to bring it up, but the guilty expression Katie was sporting told Emily that she might have told everyone.
Katie was about to say something, but Naomi stopped her with a hand on her arm, and a sad smile. "She didn't say anything," Naomi said then watched as Effy shifted slightly, and knew that her friend knew more about Emily, "at least, not to me. But that's not the point, is it?"
"Look, I know I freaked out today, but it's my problem, yeah?" Emily could feel the irritation coursing through her, as she sat back in her chair and folded her arms in front of her.
Katie scoffed loudly. "Fuck if it's just your problem anymore, Emily. You had a panic attack brought on by clients! And it's not going to get any better, is it?" She was on a roll now, as her conversation with Gina earlier came back to her. "You bury things, Emily and you hide, but when these episodes start showing on the telly, you won't be able to do that. Let that sink in for a minute."
The older twin was out of breath as she finished her mini rant. Naomi and Effy looked at each other, wondering what brought that on, but knew that Katie was right. And Emily's eyes widened as her sister's words made an impact on her brain, setting off alarms. She could feel the pressure on her chest, it felt like a steel band had been wrapped around her and it was tightening as she sat there. Emily stood up quickly, taking deep breaths, trying to prevent another attack.
Cook couldn't take it, that look of fear in her eyes. "Stop it!" He growled out. "Scaring her into telling you people anything is bullying!"
"Fuck you, Cook! She needs to know that she's not the only one effected by her actions now." Katie said, trying not to shout.
Emily stepped away from the table, retreating. "I need a few minutes…t-to…to think." She started walking out of the room, then called over her shoulder. "Just give me a few…I'll be right, um…I'll be back."
The rest of them sat at the table and listened as Emily walked down the hallway and shut her bedroom door. It took about three seconds before Cook and Katie blew up at each other and Naomi rolled her eyes at them.
"You do realise she can probably hear you, right?" Naomi shook her head in disgust and pushed away from the table. "I'm going to the loo, I'll be right back."
She could hear them still, even though they did lower their voices, as she shut the bathroom door and did what she had to do. When she finished up, she washed her hands and looked at herself in the mirror, much the same way Emily had earlier and wondered if it was worth it pursuing Emily. Naomi gave it some thought as she kept staring into her own eyes, until her blue ones were replaced with warm, smiling brown ones and she knew that, yes, Emily was worth it.
Naomi left the bathroom, stood listening to the noise coming from the kitchen and felt sure that Emily was still in her room. She looked around, noticing the closed door to her left, hoping that the redhead was in there so, she knocked gently.
"Emily? It's Naomi," she said, realising how similar to this afternoon it was, and almost chuckled until she remembered what happened then, so she cracked the door open and looked around the dimly lit room.
She took in the spartan look and felt sadness wash over her. Emily didn't have any tokens or pictures, nothing that made the room her own, but Naomi had to remind herself that she was only here for a short time whilst filming. Her eyes flicked to the bed, hoping to find Emily but she found it empty.
Naomi stepped further into the room and closed the door behind her. "Emily?" She called out again, panicking slightly.
"I'm right here." It was shaky, but not tearful, Naomi noticed as she whipped around to find the source of the voice and she saw Emily huddled in the corner of the room, wedged between the wall and the bed. "I'm not freaking out again, I just…needed a minute to gather my thoughts. It's a lot to ask of me, ya know. But I understand that the show is what's important-,"
"Fuck the show, Ems." Naomi cut her off, feeling this huge need to prove Emily that she was the important thing here. "I could give two shits about the show right at the moment, it's you I'm worried about, yeah?"
Emily was shocked at Naomi's words. This was the first time someone, outside of her family and her two friends, seemed to want to put her first and even though she felt a fluttering of happiness about that, it was immediately eclipsed by fear. Felicity had put her first once upon a time and look how that turned out.
"May I?" Naomi gestured to the bed and waited for an answer.
Emily nodded. "Sure."
Naomi sat down and got comfortable before turning back to the redhead. "Emily, what happened today is not right and I'm sorry, so sorry, that I had a part in pushing you that far-,"
Emily shook her head. "You didn't do anything, it was me…," she trailed off as Naomi glared at her.
"Don't you dare do that, Emily. Don't you dare take the blame for what I did, even if I didn't know what I was doing!" Naomi admonished emphatically. "I shouldn't have yelled, I knew something was wrong, but I didn't know exactly what was wrong…and I know it's been stressful, you know, doing what we've been doing whilst your girlfriend," Naomi spat out the word and rolled her eyes, but kept on talking, "was here, so I'm sorry for putting that kind of pressure on you."
Emily didn't say anything, couldn't say anything because it was a foreign concept to her. Having someone she liked, more than liked actually, apologise to her. Someone had treated her badly, yet felt guilty enough to feel remorse about it and that made Emily's heart flutter.
"There's a reason for what happened today, Naomi and it wasn't you, I promise." Emily replied quietly, feeling the need to finally tell someone.
Naomi gazed at the redhead, cocking her head to the side, watching the way her eyes looked in the dim lamplight. "Tell me. Does it have anything to do with…Felicity?"
"How do you know that name?" Emily asked, her voice shaking and she shrunk in on herself as if she was trying to make herself as small as possible.
Naomi noticed it all, realising that she had done that earlier, and sighed. "You kept muttering it this afternoon, ya know, during…but tell me the reason."
Emily shook her head sadly. "I can't, Naoms. I want to. I really do, which is strange if I'm being honest and that thought scares the shit out of me, but also if I don't tell Katie first…," her eyes locked onto Naomi's and held her gaze, "she doesn't even know this."
Naomi could've cried right then, but she controlled that feeling and concentrated on that fact that Emily wanted to share something with her even if she couldn't at the moment. It made her feel happy. Happier than she had felt in a really long time and Naomi could barely stop herself from doing a little dance in her spot on the bed.
'Fucks sake, Campbell! Can you stay focused, please?' Naomi admonished herself silently when another thought popped into her head. "Do you really want Katie to know?" Naomi asked.
"Yes and no?" Emily replied, looking up at Naomi from her place on the floor. "No, because I really don't want anyone to know, but yes, because it's become an issue now. And if she doesn't hear it first, from me, she'll go ballistic."
Naomi nodded along with the explanation, then slid off the bed and made her way over to Emily on her knees. She gently peeled Emily's hands from around her knees and laced their fingers together, before leaning in to kiss her on the forehead. "I'm going to keep saying this until you truly believe me," Naomi said softly and waited until Emily looked her in the eyes again, "I meant what I said, yeah? I want you and I want to get to know you. Everything about you, okay? I'll go get Katie for you." She kissed Emily's forehead again and stood up, making her way quickly to the door.
"You'll come back too?" Emily asked shyly, feeling pathetic again.
Naomi smiled to herself before turning back to the redhead. "I'll be right back."
Katie waited nervously and kept watching for the return of Emily. She was afraid that Emily was slipping backwards and that scared her.
"I think it's time to call my dad," she told the room, knowing it was the right thing to do didn't make it feel any less wrong, "she's been doing better, Emily has been...it's been years since she's had attack this bad, but...Dad deserves to know."
Freddie and Cook started in on why that was a bad idea, while Effy and Gina stayed quiet.
"C'mon, Kay!" Freddie shook his head sadly, knowing how his friend will respond. "You know that Emily hates your dad worrying, also she feels like he's watching her, waiting for the minute she breaks again!"
"Yeah, he's right." Cook agreed, nodding along.
Katie was about to kick off again, but Gina placed a comforting hand on hers and spoke up for the first time since they had started the conversation.
"If I could say something here, as a parent," Gina looked around the table, her gaze coming to rest on the boys, "I understand the need to know what's going on with my child. It's not because I'm being nosy, it's because that child is a part of me and no matter if they're five, twenty or forty, a parent is always going to try and make things better,"
Cook sat up and gestured wildly in the air, cutting Gina off. "That's just the thing! There's nothing to fix, she just needs time to sort things out!"
Gina looked at the young man, raising a delicate eyebrow and gave him the Campbell glare, and chuckled to herself when she watched him shrink. "James, you know, deep down you know that's not true. If that was the case, you wouldn't be so protective of her, and don't think I haven't noticed." Cook squirmed in his seat, as Gina made her point. "Katie, love, why don't we wait until we talk to Emily, get the full picture of what's going on before we make any rash decisions, yes? It really could've just been Naomi that set her off, so we'll find out and adjust accordingly, and then we call your father."
"Okay, no sense worrying him tonight, right?" Katie agreed, then glanced at the door way looking for Emily, while the rest of them talked. She was surprised to find Naomi standing there, just out of sight of everyone else, beckoning her over. "Excuse me for a moment."
Katie left the table and went into the hallway, worry for Emily etched on her face.
"Don't freak out, Katie." Naomi said quietly, when she saw her face, knowing automatically what the older twin was thinking. "She wants to talk to you before coming back out."
Katie nodded and went to Emily's room, surprised when she found Naomi on her heels but didn't say anything as she opened the door. "Emsy?"
Emily looked up, smiled a sad smile at her sister and then looked quickly at Naomi, making sure she was still there. "Hey, Katie. Come have a seat." She patted next to her.
She had made it off the floor and onto the bed, and when Katie climbed on and Naomi took a spot at the foot, it made her remember sleepovers they would have with their cousins when they were younger.
"What's going on, Emily? I'm really worried." Katie asked, unsure of whether to keep pushing her or not.
"This isn't going to be easy for me to say, Katie, but today has made me realise that I can't hide this anymore." Emily said with tears in her eyes.
Katie wrapped an arm around her and kiss her on top of her head. "Whatever it is, Emily, we'll get through it together, yeah?"
Naomi watched the sisters, suddenly missing that sibling connection that she had never had before but had secretly always wanted. She had hoped for a long time that her mum and dad would give her a brother or sister, but they had found out that Kieran wasn't able to, so he focused all his love and attention on Gina and Naomi. She stayed quiet as Emily and Katie said something in what sounded like gibberish.
"Alright, enough with the twin speak, Emsy." Katie pulled away with a chuckle, taking Emily's face in her hands, making sure she could see into her eyes. "What do you wanna tell me?" She asked wiping away the tears that were falling silently from Emily.
"You were right, what you said earlier, about the clients...," Emily started, looking at Naomi before turning back to Katie, "the wife, Julia? She...her first husband...was abusive."
"Oh." Katie said when it hit fully, knowing now the reason for Emily's panic attack. "I see...,"
"It was more than that, Ems." Naomi stated plainly, drawing attention to herself. "Yeah, I mean...I could see that you were uncomfortable whilst Julia was talking about her first husband but...something else really set you off, didn't it?"
To say Emily was shocked by Naomi's observation would be an understatement and she shifted nervously. Katie looked back and forth between the two of them.
"Was there something else, Ems?" Katie asked, curious about what had been said.
Emily frowned and nodded. "Yes. Julia talked about not being...able to have children."
Katie and Naomi both looked at each other, confused about why that would matter before Emily kept talking.
"I can't...she...Felicity, she...," Emily felt sick, actually sick to her stomach the way she always did whenever she talked about Felicity. It was one of the main reasons why she didn't like anyone talking about her, the shame and the pain of having to think about things that were in the past was too hard. But she knew that now she had started, she needed to finish. "She, um...,"
"Take your time, Ems." Katie told her, rubbing Emily's shoulders as they tensed up. "There's no rush at all, yeah?"
Naomi watched as Emily took a few deep breaths and released them slowly. She was dying to find out who Felicity was and what she did to Emily, but she wasn't about to push for answers. Even without knowing exactly what had happened in the past, Naomi felt a sense of sadness and anger.
"Felicity...she, well...," another pause as Emily focused and cast a quick glance at Naomi, "fuck...this is hard! She didn't like to...never wanted evidence to be seen, after you started questioning the bruising on nights out...so the stomach, she made sure to hit there," Emily watched as Naomi winced wen the words came out of her mouth and the blonde's face hardened, "there were multiple traumas that went unnoticed."
Katie bristled with fury as the implications of what Emily was saying set in. "When? And how the fuck did I not know this, Emily? That's not something you can hide, is it? Because towards the end of the relationship, it's not like you spent a lot of time alone, so isn't that something I would've noticed?" Her tone was almost accusatory, forgetting for the tiniest moment that she wasn't supposed to cause anymore stress for Emily. "Why the fuck didn't you tell me?"
Emily cringed as "Bitchy Katie" made an appearance. "Don't do that, Kay." She muttered, catching her sister's eyes, using all her strength to hold the look. "Don't blame me for her, not now. Not when I need you the most."
"Jesus fuck, Emily!" Katie huffed out, feeling hurt and disappointment. "I guess I'm just...you could've told me, you cow."
"I know, but it was, still is hard to do." Emily rxplained meekly. "I'm sorry, Katie."
Naomi watched as Katie sniffed away a few tears, then it looked as if she readying herself to have a go at Emily. But she shook her head as if trying to get rid of her negative thoughts. "When? When did this happen?" Katie asked, her voice clipped and curt. "When did you find out?"
"Remember that weekend you went home for Aunt Traci's birthday? I didn't go because I thought I was sick with a stomach bug, but it had only gotten worse as the night went on. Felicity came over and could tell it wasn't the flu, so she took me to hospital. The doctor on call referred me to a gynecologistThere were abscesses, a lot of abscesses...pelvic inflammatory disease, the doctor called it, caused by bacteria along with the beatings and too much scar tissue built up...it went on for too long, and it means I can't have children. I can't carry children."
Katie stayed silent long after Emily finished explaining, feeling a deep hurt for her sister, as the full picture of what that bitch had done to her became clearer. Whilst Emily never actually talked about having kids, Katie knew it was something she had wanted. A big family was the one thing both of them had dreamt about when they were younger and that dream had been ripped away from Emily.
"That fucking cunt!" Katie finally exploded, causing Emily to jump and scoot away from her. "That useless cunting motherfucking waste of space!" Her lisp was pronounced and Naomi could only stare in shock as the older twin stood up and started pacing.
"Katie."
Back and forth, Emily and Naomi watched her walk, as Katie continued. "Like, abusing you wasn't fucking bad enough? Taking away your youth and innocence wasn't fucking enough?"
"Katie, please stop." Emily's pleas went unnoticed.
"Nooooo...she had to leave you with a constant reminder of her, didn't she? That stupid prick!"
"Katie, shut up!" Emily finally yelled, causing the room to go quiet, bringing Katie's pacing to a stop.
Naomi watched as none of them moved. Katie looked embarrassed by her outburst and Emily, well actually Naomi couldn't tell what Emily was feeling.
"Hold up, are saying...are you saying what I think you're saying?" Naomi asked as her head began pounding, along with her heart, as the implications of dating someone with Emily's past started to sink in. She realised that taking on someone who's been completely broken might be too much for her take on.
Emily heard the disbelief and anger in Naomi's voice and hung her head as shame flowed through her again. This is what she didn't want! Naomi disgusted with her.
"I'm sorry...,"
Naomi shook her head and glared at the younger twin. "If you apologise to me one more time...," she left the threat hanging between them, as she processed everything she had heard so far and her own feelings about it. "I just...it's hard for me to picture it...and you, of all people!"
"What is that supposed to mean, her of all people?" Katie's look turned fierce in seconds. "What about her of all people? What, like she has fucking beat me written on her forehead?"
Katie slapped her hand over her mouth and knew she let her anger get the best of her when Emily gasped loudly, looking utterly shattered and Naomi glared at her.
"Katie! I can't believe you just said that!" Naomi was feeling that urge to protect Emily, not wishing to upset her further. "That's not what I meant at all." She clarified somewhat, turning back to Emily. "What I meant was, since I've met you, you've been nothing but lovely. Even when you-know-who popped up in that club back in Bristol and I turned into a total twat, yeah? I guess I'm just having a hard time imagining why anyone would do that to you."
Emily scoffed and rolled her eyes. "If you can figure that out, kindly let me know, would ya? I've spent nine years trying to figure that out."
"Just to be clear, and I don't want to make matters worse," Naomi looked into Emily's eyes and spoke softly, " but this...she...abused you?"
Emily felt her heart lurch a bit at the concern that Naomi displayed, but felt oddly at ease with telling her the truth now that she had spilled her greatest shame, and she nodded and then she and Katie spent the next little bit telling Naomi everything.
When they were done, Naomi processed the information and discovered that Emily made her want to try, she still wanted some type of relationship with her. "Fuck me." Naomi said quietly, not looking at either twin and started to wonder what she could do to help. "We should probably get back out there, yeah? Finish the rest of the meeting?"
The twins agreed and they left the comfort of Emily's room, each one of them lost in their own thoughts.
It was quiet around the table, now that everyone had calmed down and Emily, Katie, and Naomi came back out.
Emily was surprisingly calm, telling everyone at the table what happened earlier and why. It was hard to watch Cook's and Freddie's faces so, Emily kept her eyes bouncing around the table. She knew that they would blame themselves for what had happened to her, but she knew deep down that the only true person to blame was Felicity.
Gina and Effy had both teared up a little but brushed them away and when Emily was done, Effy sat up straighter in her seat.
"Thank you for telling us, Emily. I know it can't have been easy for you." Effy said, making sure she kept eye contact. "First thing to do is find out everything we can about this Felicity-'"
Emily's eyes widened and she felt her chest tighten up. "W-why do we need to do that?" she asked nervously, casting quick glances at everyone.
Naomi placed a comforting hand on Emily's arm, rubbing it up and down, doing her best to sooth her. "Ems, we need to know where she is and what she's doing, we don't mean for you to be in the same room as her-,"
"As if I'd let that happen!" Katie spat out, followed by sounds of agreement from a Cook and Freddie.
"It's a way to protect the show and Emily," Effy informed the room, "if we have eyes on her, once this all goes public, then we can get a better idea of what she may or may not do. In the mean time, Emily...I've arranged for you to see someone-,"
Again the room started talking at once, all except Emily, who remained quiet.
"Shut up!" Effy yelled, which sounded weird because Effy wasn't a yelling kinda girl. Once the room was silent again, she turned back to Emily. "Emily, you know this is the right thing to do, yeah?"
"I know. I'm sorry-,"
Naomi scoffed. "Stop apologising. This isn't a punishment, Ems," she stated gently, turning to look at the redhead next to her, "it's a chance to get help for a situation you had almost no control over and didn't deal with properly, okay?"
"Emily, there are more families that we'll be working with. There's no garuantee that we won't encounter more backgrounds like Julia's, but Ems," Effy spoke softly, trying to get her point across, because she felt the same as Naomi when it came to the show, the only thing that really mattered was Emily, "I know I've not known you very long, or as well as others," she smirked at Emily and Naomi, "but I care about you, yeah? I'd like to think that we're friends, and I'd really love to be able to help you, okay?"
"Alright, Effy. I'll go see someone." Emily agreed quietly, feeling a mixture of defeat and touched all at the same time.
Effy smiles at her. "Good, I've arranged for appointments that fit in with our schedule, alright? And don't worry, you won't be doing this entirely on your own."
Everyone looked at Effy, confusion about her statement clear on the faces around the table.
"What do you mean by that?" Naomi asked, suspicion dripping in her voice.
Effy smirked at her best friend. "That means, Naomi, that you and Emily will also be attending sensitivity training together," Effy held up her hand quickly to cut off Naomi's argument, "I know it wasn't completely your fault, what happened earlier, but you did have an unknowing hand in it so, for the greater good of the show and Emily, you, my friend are going to learn how to handle these types of situations. Both of you have your first joint appointment tomorrow night after we finish work, with Doctor Mary Miles." Effy's words left Naomi and Emily stunned, as the rest of them chuckled just a little bit.
As everyone started getting ready to leave, Emily pulled Naomi off to the side.
"What's up, Ems?" Naomi asked, speaking softly. Emily looked serious, causing her to worry.
"I would like you to stay." Emily replied just as quietly. She sounded pathetic and she hated sounding needy. "Here, with me. I'd like you to stay."
"Babes...," Naomi's heart soared at the request, because it was the first time Emily had asked it of her, but she knew it wasn't the right time, "you know I'd love nothing more, but we both realise that the timing is wrong."
Emily swallowed back the lump in her throat, and her heart lurched at Naomi's words. It wasn't an out right rejection, she told herself. "I know it's not the right time, Naoms...it's just...you make me feel...comfortable in my own skin sometimes."
"Just sometimes?" Naomi asked with an inappropriate smirk and watched as Emily blushed deeply. "Look, let's get through this bloody appointment Effy's arranged for us and then we'll see what happens, okay?"
Emily nodded, reluctantly agreeing. "Yeah...see what happens. Night, Naoms." She stood on her tiptoes to place a gentle kiss on Naomi's cheek before backing away.
"Night, Ems." Naomi smiled at her as she made her way out the door to go find her mum, leaving Katie and Emily alone.
That night, both Naomi and Emily tossed and turned, each of them thinking about what had happened, as sleep was slow to hit.
Naomi laid awake as she thought about everything that she had done since she met Emily and she realised that they had learnt to dance around each other for so long now, that the possibility of actually dealing with each other seemed like a good thing suddenly and even though both of them were scared for their own reasons, she decided that this could possibly be the best thing to happen to them.
Alrighty, folks...I'm thinking this will be the last update of the year. With the holidays coming up it's time for me to be a grown up... but keep your eyes peeled for an update after the first of the year.
so from me to all of you, have a safe and happy holidays!
Love to you all,
Marci