Chapter 92

When Scarlett descended the stairs, she felt as if she were in a daze. While she felt touched and delighted at experiencing a tender moment with Rhett, she also felt anxious and strained. She tried to think about what she must do. She tried to gather all her wits about her. But instead, she seemed to desire to run back to Rhett and throw herself into his protective arms. She felt both attracted and repulsed by this idea. It felt strange that after everything she had been through, she must still want to look on him for support.

She didn't realize that she was standing on top of the grand stairs in such a meditative fashion. So, when Rosemary called her from below, she blushed so hard that it immediately gave the wrong implication that there had been some intimacy between herself and Rhett.

Rosemary immediately averted her eyes as if she were startled. Before she could walk away, Scarlett recovered herself and came down the stairs in a rush.

"Rosemary, I did want to speak to you." she began, hoping that Rosemary wouldn't make too much of what she had witnessed. "I know we planned a trip to the church and that lovely ride by the sea. But I just now spoke to Rhett and he has made some other plans. We are still coming along in the coach, but Rhett and I are going elsewhere- I thought just this once, you could manage my two children. I'll tell them to be good."

"Oh that's all right, Scarlett. I don't mind. Wade has grown up quite a lot. He's not exactly a child now. I'll manage them in some way. But what about- oh, its a pity they cleared the breakfast table."

Rosemary stared at the clean white lace cloth being spread newly on the table in the breakfast room and the Butler walking away with his silver tray.

"Oh." said Scarlett. "Perhaps I could cut the sandwiches. Yes, I think I'll do that"

Scarlett went into the kitchen and began taking things down from shelves- pickles, jars of marmalade, butter- There was a large loaf of bread right on the counter. She was just selecting the knives when the Cook herself came in through the door. When she saw Scarlett, the Cook's eyes widened and narrowed in displeasure.

"I'll cut those sandwiches for you, Ma'am." she offered, gruffly. "I was only outside to dry the pots- I'll cut the sandwiches for you."

"Don't you have to cook lunch?" asked Scarlett. "Besides, I already finished. I just needed to make two sandwiches-"

Rosemary signalled for the Cook to go about her work and watched Scarlett put the finishing touches on the sandwiches with some interest. She smiled up at her, clearly admiring her practicality. "It's wonderful that you just dive right into whatever you want to do, Scarlett. Tell me, is it somewhere romantic?"

"What is?"

"Wherever Rhett is taking you." Rosemary's eyes seemed to withdraw into a warm haze of beauty and softness.

Scarlett looked at her once and stifled a smile. "Hardly." she said. "He wanted to visit Mr. Butler's grave. We are going there and then afterwards-"

Scarlett felt Rosemary's hand on her wrist. She looked up and saw Rosemary staring at her in fear. "Scarlett, why do you want to go there? Did Rhett ask you?"

"Well, yes..I-"

Rosemary's grip tightened. "Scarlett, don't do it. You.. you don't know what you will be starting. Rhett hated his father and they had the most horrible power struggles. You know about Rhett when he gets into his tempers. Mother doesn't like to talk about it. She believes in his goodness and I do too. But father and brother were always at the receiving end. Rhett can see things, he notices things about people, things that people wouldn't admit openly and he pretends to help. But really, he comes down very hard in the end."

Scarlett felt her hand twinge. When she spoke, her voice was steady and filled with muted disgust. " When Rhett has provided so much for you after the war, this house and all the things inside, don't you think-"

Rosemary turned aside and suddenly began to cry.

Scarlett felt dreadful. She led Rosemary out the back door to the little garden outside and they stood under a shady tree.

Rosemary wiped her tears and said, "Scarlett, we suffered dreadfully. My father starved to death and he expected my mother and myself to starve too. Do you think its easy, watching a proud man going about the empty house, doing whatever work he could find, talking to old men, young injured men, getting into angry fits and knowing in the end that there would be almost nothing on the dinner table? He never knew when he died. No one was with him. He died as proudly as he lived."

Scarlett immediately put her head against her shoulder. "Oh, I know it must have been a terrible time for you. There.. there, dear."

"But listen" continued Rosemary, with muffled sobs. "Mother always respected my father. He was her pillar of strength. Maybe Mother was partial to father but that's only natural isn't it? She has kept Rhett and my father apart. If.. if Rhett were to go now and visit the grave, he might get very angry and he might start flinging out judgements on people- He can be very cruel, Scarlett. I don't know what it is. But it might cause harm. Especially to Mother- So, please dissuade him. He mustn't look back to the past."

Scarlett breathed hard, feeling her anger still rising. She was feeling very much alive for some strange reason.

"Rosemary, you are forgetting that I am his wife. I love Rhett and I didn't suggest this idea to him. He thought of it. And perhaps he is cruel but the only way he will ever come out of it is if he follows his heart himself. Now, I can't simply hide things from him. That's what his Mother does. I can only help him and I understand what you have said. I won't push Rhett into anything awful- I'm not doing this for my sake. I have a house and a plantation to get back to. I have no ambitions here."

"Oh no, I don't mean to accuse you-"

"I know about Rhett but I also know that he is kind and good. He once helped me- I was very young when I married my first husband. And he died without having ever done anything significant in the war. But he was gentle and good. And I was made to wear mourning clothes and forced to sit with the matrons at parties. And that's when Rhett learnt all about me and he dared me to dance with him at a charity ball-"

Rosemary covered her mouth in shock and then began to laugh. Soon they were both laughing together-

Suddenly she saw Rhett standing at the door, waiting for her. She picked up her skirts and with Rosemary following her, they went back inside to leave on their trip.