One year later…
May 2017
I heard that you're settled down
That you found a girl and you're married now
I heard that your dreams came true
Guess she gave you things I didn't give it to you
Old friend why are you so shy
It aint like you to hold back or hide from the light
I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited
But I couldn't stay away I couldn't fight it
I had hope you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded
That for me it isn't over
Never mind I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you two
Don't forget me I beg
I'll remember you said
Sometimes it lasts and loves
But sometimes it hurts instead
Sometimes it lasts and loves
But sometimes it hurts instead
You know how the time flies
Only yesterday was the time of our lives
We were born and raised in a summer haze
Bound by the surprise of our glory days
I hate to turn up out of the blue uninvited
But I couldn't stay away I couldn't fight it
I had hope you'd see my face and that you'd be reminded
That for me it isn't over
Never mind I'll find someone like you
I wish nothing but the best for you two
Don't forget me I beg
I'll remember you said
Sometimes it lasts and loves
But sometimes it hurts instead
Sometimes it lasts and loves
But sometimes it hurts instead
Nothing compares no worries or cares
Regrets and mistakes they're memories made
Who would have known how bitter sweet this would taste...
That night, Beca left her office in an excellent mood. Her boss had asked her to attend a very important meeting on her behalf, which would take place in LA in a few days. Although it would be a quick trip she was excited to visit the City of Angels. The fact that her boss had trusted her with representing her at the meeting was a sign Beca was doing things right, and she wasn't going to waste her opportunity to prove herself she was on the right path.
The next day was a wednesday, lunch day with Chloe. Beca told her about her upcoming trip, to her friend's enthusiasm.
"Your first official business trip. That's awesome!"
"I wouldn't call it a business trip. The only reason I'm going is because my boss is too lazy to go herself."
"It doesn't matter, she chose to send you in her place. If you were a complete incompetent she would've picked someone else."
"That's true. Still, I wouldn't consider it to be a professional triumph," she said. She didn't want to sound too cocky.
"Have you ever been to LA before?"
"Once. My dad took me to Universal Studios when I was eight years old. Back when we were close."
"But you guys are close again, aren't you?"
"Well, yeah, but we lost too much time. That has been a constant in my life; I don't value things until I lose them."
"Good thing is you are aware of that. Perhaps you should try to live in the present and enjoy what you have right now. Like this," Chloe said, and opened her arms. "You are having a nice lunch with your friend and you are about to go on your first official business trip. I'd say life is treating you pretty nicely right now."
Beca smiled. "That's true. I can't complain."
In that moment, a man approached the two friends. He gently touched Chloe's shoulder and she turned to face him.
"Sorry to interrupt you, Chloe. I just wanted to say hi."
He was a tall, athletic man with a square face and wide cheekbones, dark hair and big blue eyes. He spoke in a mellow and somewhat shy tone, and he was very attractive. Beca guessed he was on his late twenties or early thirties.
"Hi Mattie! What a surprise to find you here," Chloe said, as she touched his hand. "How are you?"
"I'm great, thanks. You know, working."
"You are always working. How responsible."
He giggled. "Not always. Right now I'm not."
"Because you are not at the workshop. I love your jacket, by the way. It's gorgeous," she said, as she touched his arm. He looked down at her hand and his lips curved into a shy smile.
"Thanks, you can borrow it anytime you want."
Chloe turned to her friend. "Beca, this is Matthew Weissman, one of our assistant costume designers. Mattie, this is Beca; she is one of my closest friends."
Beca and Matthew shook hands. "Nice to meet you, Beca. You can call me Matt."
"Actually everyone calls him Matt, but I like to call him Mattie," Chloe pointed out.
Beca caught a glimpse of a slight blush in the young man's face. "Nice to meet you, too."
"Well, I won't take away your time anymore. I let you girls eat."
"Okay, Mattie. See you around."
"Bye."
He made a small bow and walked away, leaving Beca and Chloe alone. As she took a sip of her coffee Beca stared at her friend with curiosity.
"So… Mattie?"
"He is nice, isn't he?"
"He certainly is. For how long have you known him?"
"I met him when I first got here."
Beca put down her cup of coffee. "He is cute."
Chloe tilted her head to the side. "Really? You think?"
"You don't?"
"I don't know, I hadn't thought about it before."
Beca rose an eyebrow. "Come on, he is very attractive. I can't believe you hadn't noticed."
"I hadn't, I swear. But now that I think about it, you are right; he is quite easy on the eyes."
Beca smirked. "I think he fancies you."
Chloe looked at her with her eyes wide open. "What makes you think that?"
"He got all giggly and blushy when you touched him, even his eyes lit up."
"Come on, he did not."
"Oh yes, he did. Pay more attention next time you talk to him."
Chloe scratched her head in disbelief. "Are you sure?"
Beca rolled her eyes. "I don't think he behaves like that all the time. Or does he?"
Chloe stroke her chin, pensive. "For what I've seen he gets along with pretty much everyone, although he is not an extrovert per se. He does stammer a little every time we talk, though."
"My guess is he behaves shyly around you because he's attracted to you," Beca smirked again. "You like him?"
"We haven't talked much but he is very nice. A bit shy but respectful and sweet."
"Well, I'd say you try spending more time with him. He's clearly into you, and you lose nothing by getting to know him better. "Live in the moment, remember?" She winked.
Chloe frowned, irritated. "Damn it, Beca. Now because of you I won't stop thinking about it!" She shook her head. "You know what? Let's change the subject. So back to your trip to LA—"
"Yes?"
"When are you leaving?"
"The day after tomorrow. And I'll return Sunday night."
"Oh, an express visit."
"Yeah, but you just gave me an idea of how I can make the most of it."
"What do you mean?"
Beca began twisting the crystal on her necklace in anxiety. "I think I will try to visit Jesse."
Chloe's eyes widened. "What for?"
"You know, to catch up. We haven't talked in a while and I'd like to see what he's been up to."
"When was the last time you talked?"
"When we broke up."
"Two years?"
"Yeah."
Her friend squinted at her. "Beca, I don't think this is a good idea."
"Why not?"
"Because things are different now. He is married, he is living a new life. He's probably not the same guy you knew."
Beca rolled her eyes. "I wouldn't do anything stupid, Chloe. Do you think I'm capable of going all Fatal Attraction on Jesse's ass? I just wanna talk, that's all."
"I don't see why. You might get hurt."
"I won't because what happened between Jesse and me is in the past. Or what, I can't talk to my friend anymore?"
Chloe crossed her arms. "Come on, Beca. You and I know Jesse is not your 'friend'. He is your ex-boyfriend, and you can't be friends with your exes."
"Says who?"
"Anyone with a small amount of common sense. How are you gonna find him, anyway? You don't even know where he lives."
"I can ask Benji."
"Do you think he will give you his adress?"
"I don't see why not."
Chloe sighed, defeated. "Alright, alright. You are an adult and you know what you are doing. Just promise me you will stay calm and you won't feel disappointed or sad by what you see."
"I promise. Trust my judgment."
"I trust your judgment more than I trust mine."
Beca decided to leave her visit to Jesse's house for her last day in LA. That Sunday morning the sun shone bright in Downtown Los Angeles. She took a moment to appreciate the view of the Grand Avenue, which went on for several blocks in front of her.
She walked all the way to the address Benji had given her, and she soon found herself in front of a building a couple of blocks away from the Cathedral of Our Lady of the Angels. She looked for apartment number 2, which was on the ground floor. She took a deep breath and rang the bell, not sure of what she was supposed to say in case Jesse was the one to open the door.
A young woman opened the door. She was of medium height and had a heart-shaped face with a wide forehead and a pointed chin, wide hazel eyes, long, light brown hair and slightly tanned skin. She was wearing a The Lion King hoodie, jeans and black snickers.
"Can I help you?" She politely asked Beca. Her voice was very pleasing to the ears, melodious and soft. Beca thought she had the voice of a professional singer.
"Um, hi. I'm looking for Jesse Swanson, they told me he lived here."
"Who's looking for him?"
Beca doubted before answering. How was she supposed to introduce herself?
"My name's Beca, I'm Jesse's friend from Barden University."
The woman tilted her head to the side. "Beca Mitchell?"
Beca rose an eyebrow. "You know who I am?"
"Of course I do, Jesse has told me everything about you," the woman smiled and extended her hand to Beca. "I'm Jane Kimble; I'm Jesse's wife."
Beca did her best to hide her surprise.
Of course. The Broadway hoodie, the voice—why didn't I realize it before?
She shook hands with Jane and immediately noticed her tight grip. "A pleasure to meet you."
"A pleasure to meet you, too. Please, come inside! Jesse went for a walk but he should be here any minute."
Beca went inside. It was not a big apartment but it was not small either. It had a wooden floor and the walls were white and looked freshly painted. A lot of natural light entered the room thanks to four large windows, which had shutters. Three couches and a small coffee table made up the living room, and Beca noted there was no television. The only electronic device in the room was a wireless speaker she recognized immediately: Jesse's father had given it to him for his 20th birthday, and it was one of his most beloved possessions. A dining table with chairs and a storage cabinet made up the dining room, and Beca spotted the kitchen door from her spot near the entrance. Next to the dining room were two more doors, and she supposed they gave way to the master bedroom and the bathroom.
"Please, make yourself comfortable," Beca sat down at one of the couches. "Would you like something to drink or to eat?"
"No, thanks. I just had breakfast at my hotel."
Jane sat down beside her and Beca's breathing quickened. "I've wanted to meet you for ages. You are exactly as I imagined you to be."
"To be honest I'm quite surprised you know who I am."
"Well, when I first met Jesse you were still together. He talked about you a lot; your name always came up during conversations. Every time somebody brought up The Breakfast Club he would mention you, and how you serenated him with 'Don't You (Forget About Me)'."
"He did?" Beca tried her best not to sound too bitter.
"Yeah. I figured you were an amazing person judging by the things he said about you."
"What exactly did he say about me?"
"He said you were the smartest, most hardworking woman he had ever known. He praised your leadership abilities and your ability to stay calm even in the most difficult moments. He said you were a brilliant musician and that you had a bright future ahead of you. He mentioned you may come across as grumpy, but underneath the thought exterior lies a heart of gold. You could easily tell—" She stopped mid-sentence.
"What?"
A slight smile appeared on Jane's face. "You could easily tell he loved you very much."
Beca felt a lump in her throat. She forced herself to smile back at Jane. "Well, all of that is in the past now, isn't it? Life goes on."
"It does," Jane seemed ashamed by the comment she had made. "I hope him telling me about your relationship doesn't bother you."
"Why would it? You are his wife. There shouldn't be any secrets between you two."
She was obviously lying. What had happened between her and Jesse was theirs; he had no right telling others about their relationship. She felt as if Jesse had stabbed her in the back, as if he had publicly exposed her.
"So I understand you are a musician, aren't you?" She quickly asked Jane, to change the subject.
"I am a lyricist, yeah. I also sing occasionally."
"I bet you have a lovely voice."
"Thanks. I've seen videos of you singing when you were in college. What was your group's name?"
"The Barden Bellas."
"I think you girls were awesome, and you have an amazing voice. Haven't you thought about becoming a professional singer?"
Beca laughed. "No, not really. Singing is more of a hobby to me. I enjoy it, but not enough to make a living out of it."
In that moment, Beca heard footsteps approaching the apartment.
"That must be Jesse," Jane said, as the lock on the door turned. Beca held her breath and did her best to remain as impassive as possible.
But nothing could have ever prepared her for what she was about to see.
The stroller was the first thing she saw. Then, as she looked up, a couple of tiny feet, chubby legs, a small, fragile body and the rosy cheeks. Finally her eyes set on the baby's, and she knew.
He had a son.
Time stood still for a moment. Beca had mentally prepared herself to meet Jesse's wife; she hadn't considered the possibility of them having a child. It was as if someone had thrown a bucket of cold water on her.
He was a gorgeous little boy, Beca guessed he was one month old. Two, tops. The baby smiled at her and Beca couldn't resist smiling back at him. He had Jesse's smile.
Her eyes then met Jesse's. He hadn't changed in the two years since she had last seen him. Same hairstyle, same clothes, same relaxed stand. It seemed as if no time had passed. He seemed surprised at seeing her there, probably as surprised as Beca was when she saw the baby.
"Beca?" Jesse's shocked voice perfectly matched his facial expression. "Oh my God, what are you doing here?"
"Hi, Jess. I'm sorry I came by unannounced, I was in town because of my job and I thought it would be a good idea to come say hi. I hope you don't mind."
"Of course not, on the contrary; I'm just very surprised to see you, that's all. It's been so long," he smiled, although Beca could tell the whole situation was making him uncomfortable. She knew him too well and she could easily read through that smile.
Jane got to her feet and stood next to Jesse, and she took the baby in her arms. "Look, Jamie, a friend came to visit us today," she made him wave at Beca with his tiny hand. "Her name is Beca, she is daddy's friend from school."
"Hello, young mister," Beca said as she waved back at him. "You are very handsome," suddenly, the baby started crying. "Oh uh, maybe he doesn't like been called that way."
Jesse frowned. "What is it, Jamie? Are you hungry?"
"I don't think so, I fed him before you took him out."
Jesse smelled his back. "I think he needs to have his diaper changed. I'll check."
"No, I'll do it. You stay here and talk to Beca. After all she came to see you, not me," Jane reassured him, and took Jamie to the bedroom. "I'll be right back."
Beca caught a glimpse of panic in Jesse's eyes. Clearly, the idea of his wife leaving him alone with his ex-girlfriend wasn't a pleasing one. They remained in complete silence for a few seconds, as if they were both afraid to be the first one to speak.
"So Jamie, huh?" She decided to break the ice.
"Yeah."
"How old is he?"
"One month."
"He seems like a nice boy. You must be very proud of him."
Jesse let out a smile. "He is definitely something," he then looked right into Beca's eyes. "What are you doing here, Beca? It's not I'm not happy to see you, because I am, it's just I never thought I would see you again. I don't know what to say."
"It's not like you to not know what to say, man."
"I know. See what you do to me?"
Beca laughed. "I heard you got married. I guess I wanted to see it with my own eyes."
"Who told you?"
"Benji. Please don't be mad at him; he didn't want to tell me but I made him do it."
"No, I'm not mad at him. How could I?" He looked down. "I'm so sorry, I was the one who was supposed to tell you. I hate you had to find out from someone other than myself."
"Don't. You had your reasons and… it's okay. I'm not angry," she smiled. "As a matter of fact, I'm very happy for you. Jane seems like an amazing woman."
"She is. She has made me immensely happy. She is kind, friendly, sensitive, perceptive—"
"Just like you. Sounds like a match made in heaven; you didn't deserve less than that. It seems like your dreams came true," Beca sighed. "You always talked about getting married and having kids, and now look at you! You are married, you have a son and you will surely become a world-famous composer sooner than later."
"The truth is I'm a very happy man."
"I believe you. A couple of minutes ago, when I first saw you, I thought you hadn't changed at all. But now that I think about it, you seem more at ease with yourself. Pleased, relaxed."
"You, on the other hand, haven't changed a bit. You are still the same girl I fought so hard to impress at our first riff-off. The one I serenated from inside my parents' car," the memories made him smile. "I talk about those days and they feel so… distant."
"It happens to me, too. It seems like it was only yesterday you and I were together. Life was somewhat easier back then."
A beat. Jesse looked at her with a trace of sorrow in his eyes. "I'm sorry our relationship didn't make it, Beca."
Beca wanted to say she was sorry, too, but she couldn't. She was too proud to admit it.
"It's like that sometimes, isn't it? With love. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose," she said instead.
"It is. So I guess we both made the right choice, didn't we?"
She took a moment before answering. "I suppose we did."
This is it. If you are going to say what you have in mind, you better say it right now. You won't get another chance.
She took a deep breath. "Listen, Jesse. There's something I need to tell you. The reason why I came here is because… I wanted to see how you were doing. I tried not to think about you but I couldn't. I still miss you, and there's no point in denying it. I think, deep in my heart, I haven't stopped loving you."
"Beca, I—"
"Wait," she gestured to silence him. "I want to finish this before Jane comes back," he didn't try to say anything else. "You were—and still are—a very important person in my life. I don't mean to tell you this to make you feel bad or ruin your happiness, I promise. I am glad you are happy and I wish you continue to be for as long as you live. I mean it with all my heart. The reason why I'm telling you this is because chances are we will never see each other again, and I needed to get this out of my chest. I don't wanna have any regrets."
Jesse was clearly taken aback by her words. "I… I don't know what to say."
"You don't have to say anything. I just wanted you to know."
He looked down and then back up. "Thank you for telling me. If it's any consolation, I want you to know I will never forget what happened between us."
There was a spark in his eyes. Beca's heart skipped a beat. "You won't?"
"How could I?" He smiled again, but this time it was a sad smile. "What about you?"
"Never."
They both stood there, just staring at each other. Beca wasn't sure of what she was supposed to say next. It seemed as if the conversation had hit a dead end.
Thankfully, Jane went back to the living room almost immediately. Baby Jamie had stopped crying and he seemed happier than before.
"We are back," Jane said, as she caressed the baby's cheek. "You were right, he needed to have his diaper changed."
"No wonder he was feeling uncomfortable," Beca looked at the baby and an idea crossed her mind. "You mind if I give him something as a one-month birthday gift?"
Jesse and Jane looked at each other. "No, not at all."
Beca removed the necklace around her neck. It consisted of a thin leather cord and a small-sized red crystal. She had bought that necklace for her first date with Jesse and had worn it every day since.
"Oh no," Jesse said a bit mortified, as Beca held the necklace in her hand. "Becs, it is your necklace—"
"And now it is his," she interrupted him. "May I?" She politely asked Jane. She nodded, and Beca carefully placed the necklace around the baby's neck. "It's Red Jasper. Now, God knows I'm a bit skeptical about this stuff, but even I can't deny this piece of rock has done a lot for me," she gently squeezed his tiny hand. "I hope it will bring you luck and help soothe you in difficult times, as it did with me."
The baby giggled and dimples appeared in his rosy cheeks, just like they did in Jesse's face whenever he laughed. He was definitely his father's son.
"Thank you, Beca," Jane said. "I promise you we will make him take good care of it."
They were interrupted when Beca's alarm went off. She took a quick look at her phone.
"Well, I better get going. I have a plane to catch."
"You are leaving so soon?" Jesse asked.
"Yeah, my plane leaves at noon. I have to return to New York in time to report back to my boss."
"Don't you want us to drive you?"
For a moment Beca thought about accepting Jane's offer, but she knew it wouldn't be comfortable for any of them.
"Thanks, Jane, but I'd rather take a cab."
"Well, in that case," she extended her hand to Beca, "I'm glad I finally met you, Beca. Good luck in your job."
Beca shook her hand. "Thanks," she caressed Jamie's foot. "Goodbye, Jamie. Don't cause trouble to your parents, okay?" She let go of the baby's foot and sighed. "Congratulations on your new baby. I wish you guys all the happiness in the world."
And she meant it.
"Thanks for visiting, Beca," Jesse said, in a slightly sad tone. "It was nice seeing you again."
They shook hands. Beca could have sworn she felt a spark.
"You too," she said, with a lump in her throat. She grabbed her purse and headed to the door.
"Beca," Jesse called her as she was about to exit. She turned. "Thank you for the gift. I know how much that necklace means to you."
She gave him one last stare, in which she tried to channel all her feelings for him.
"It was nothing," she said, and then she left.
"Hello?" Chloe's cheerful voice answered from the other side of the line.
"Hi, I just came back."
"Oh. Are you home already?"
"No, I'm in a cab. First I'll go to the office to see Martha and then I'll go home."
"How did the meeting go?"
"Boring, but I think I didn't screw up."
"Good, that's good."
"But we should wait and see what my boss thinks."
"Right," a brief pause. "So, did you visit Jesse?"
Beca didn't answer right away. "I did."
"And…"
"And… you were right. I shouldn't have visited him. It was a mistake."
"Oh, Beca. I'm so sorry."
"It's okay."
"I can't say I don't understand you. Wanting to know how your ex is doing after you break up is the most common thing, it should be in the Constitution. The difference is instead of stalking him on Facebook you chose to see it with your own eyes. You needed to see if what Benji told you was true."
"And it is. He is happy," she said, with a trace of nostalgia in her voice. "I guess a part of me held onto hope that things could work out for us in the end, but now I know that will never happen. He moved on, and now I have to do it too. In some weird way I think it's what I needed to get some closure."
"What about his wife? What is she like?"
"She is pretty great. I didn't get to talk to her that much but I liked her. She seems like a good person. They are happy; the three of them."
"Um, three?"
"Oh, yeah. They have a one-month old baby."
"Whoa! I was not expecting that."
"Neither was I."
"It must have been pretty shocking to you."
"It was, I won't deny it," a smile appeared on Beca's face. "But he is his son, Chloe. His son. He looks just like him. He is adorable."
"What is his name?"
"Jamie. I gave him my necklace as a gift."
"The Red Jasper one?"
"Uh-huh."
"Why? You love that necklace."
"I bought it before my first date with Jesse, I thought it would be symbolic."
"Closure."
"Exactly. I gave it to him with the purest of intentions."
"Well, I'm glad you got what you needed to move on."
"It was bittersweet but it had to be done."
"So what comes next for you?"
Beca thought before answering. "I guess we'll just have to wait and see. But I feel... calm. I won't deny I feel a bit sad and even nostalgic, but I'm at peace with myself. I closed a chapter today and I know I will get over him eventually. Not today or tomorrow, but eventually I will."
She had meant every word and she felt pleased with her answer.
"I like that answer. Cautious but not pessimist, very much like you."
"Yeah. Anyway, any news on your side?"
"We are not talking about Jesse anymore?"
"I'd rather change the subject."
"Oh, okay. I need to tell you something that happened today. I followed your advice about Mattie."
"What advice?"
"About getting to know him better. I saw him today and I payed attention to what you told me."
"The blushing and the giggling?"
"Yeah, it took me a while but I managed to notice it."
"And? What happened?"
"We talked for a few minutes, twenty or so. One thing led to another and he told me he has had a crush on me for quite some time now."
"That is stating the obvious."
Her friend let out and excited squeal. "We are going on date this Friday!"
Beca's eyes widened. "Really?"
"Yes! Can you believe it?"
"I… no, I don't think I can."
"He said he had been building up the courage to ask me out but he is a shy guy, it doesn't come easy for him."
"That's weird, especially coming from a very attractive person."
"Yeah. The point is I'm very excited, Beca. None of this would've happened if it weren't for you."
Beca smiled. "I'm glad I could be of help. So what comes next for you two?"
"I guess we are gonna have to wait and see."
A/N: I hope you enjoyed this chapter. There's more to come! :)