It was cold.

The temperature was so low, it felt like being submerged in snow. Everything was dull and numb.

Thaddeus Plotz slowly open his eyes. His right eye was still blurry, but his left could see nearly perfectly. The faces of his captors peered over him curiously. He tensed up, the cold in his body slowly fading and being replaced with pain.

Everything felt... Off.

Yakko smiled, his face full of fiendish glee, "Good morning, Plotzy."

Plotz tried to sit up, only to find he was still firmly strapped to the table. He whimpered as Yakko came closer, carefully observing him.

"Sibs, what do you think?" He asked, glancing back at Wakko and Dot who were watching with big eyes.

"It's some of your best work!" Wakko replied, nodding his head.

"He looks so much better!" Dot agreed.

Plotz gulped, his saliva tasting strange and alien, "Wh-... What did... What did you do to me...?!"

Yakko gestured for him to calm down, "Breathe Plotz. I don't want you putting strain on that new ticker of yours. I worked far too hard to have you ruin it." He grinned sheepishly, "Though I'm sure you want to see the results of your surgery, don't you?"

"I..." Plotz started.

Yakko quickly interrupted him, "Sibs! Bring the full length mirror. I want Thaddeus to see my genius work!"

Wakko and Dot ran off and fetched a large mirror. Yakko pulled a lever, adjusting Plotz's table until it was aligned vertically. The younger sibs handed off the mirror to the elder brother, who held it up in front of the table.

"Take a look at your brand new body, Thaddeus," Yakko grinned maliciously, "I think you'll be amazed by what you see."

Plotz's vision cleared. What was staring back at him... Was not him. There was nothing left that had once been apart of his body. Every last bit had been replaced by the body of an unknown cartoon. He had lost a significant amount of height; he was even shorter and chubbier. He still had his navy blazer and red tie, but his pants had been replaced with blue shorts. On the top of his head were two floppy ears, similar to that of a canine. His body was nearly all black except for his face, which was a sickly yellowish green. Stitches and medical grade cuts littered his face; there were likely more stitches hiding underneath the pitch black fur. A single blue eye glowed brightly in the mirror. But... He was wrong about every last piece of his body being replaced. Staring back at him was a single human eye, bloodshot and tearing up from the stress and strain. It was his eye, the only thing left of his old body.

Plotz could only sob at the sight, "I...! What have...! That's not...!"

"Ohhh yes it is you." Yakko shot back, throwing the mirror aside, "I worked hard to make you into something beautiful. You are a near perfect half-toon; the closest to perfection I have gotten yet. You... Are a key half-toon."

Plotz wept loudly, "I don't...! I don't want this!! I never wanted this! My body... Oh god my body...!"

Wakko and Dot rushed to his side, giggling at his sorrow.

"What's to cry about, you mean old man?" Dot snickered, "You'll live forever now!"

Wakko nodded, grinning maniacally, "Yeah! You'll never have to worry about heart attacks ever again! We gave you a good heart!"

"And toon powers!" Dot added.

"But... But my... My body...!" Plotz cried.

"Your body is far more advanced than anything a human body could ever hope to be." Yakko explained, poking Plotz in the chest, "You're a gorgeous, perfect creation now. Your body is a work of art! Running at full capacity, full energy; a full toon masterpiece! But there's something that sets you apart from the other half-toons..." He grabbed a small, empty syringe from his coat, "That inactive Warnerium has been running through your cardiovascular system, interacting and recombining with your human blood... That's what I'm interested in!"

"B-but... Can I... I... Never go back to my old body...?" Plotz insisted, tears streaming from his human eye.

"Nope!" Yakko replied cheerfully. He stuck the needle in Plotz's arm, quickly drawing it back and taking a sample of his blood, "I already threw those useless human body parts in my incinerator. Besides, why would you want to go back? You're better this way. You're not a pathetic looking human anymore!"

Plotz didn't answer. He simply wept quietly. He no longer tried to fight to get out of his restraints as Yakko took the blood sample. Once the process was complete, the elder Warner ran off with the syringe. He grabbed a nearby microscope, took the needle, and carefully pushed out a droplet of blood on to a tiny glass slide. He put it under the microscope and observed the contents.

Yakko was silent for a while. However, he soon started chuckling. Then laughing. Then cackling wildly. He grabbed the needle and brandished it in the air.

"At long last!!" He roared victoriously, "My research! My creations! It has all paid off! I've created the perfect combination of human and toon DNA! I hold within my hands the key to finally breaking our comedic bonds as toons!"

Wakko and Dot cheered, jumping around and singing, "We're gonna destroy the world! We're gonna destroy the world!"

Plotz shook with fear, "What... What do you mean by... Comedic bonds...? What is that... What is that... That you've made...?"

"Didn't we tell you?" Wakko replied.

"The whole reason we're doing this is not just to get revenge on Warner Brothers Studios," Dot added, "But to also break the Law of Comedy!"

"And you, dear Thaddeus, are the key." Yakko finished, grinning evilly, "But... The only problem is that we're going to need a lot of your blood for our final experiment." He approached Plotz again, rubbing his hands together with anticipation, "Oh Plotzy, have you ever given blood?"

Plotz want sure where this question was going, but decided to answer, "I have once before... What does that have to do with...?"

"Oh, it's for my next experiment!" Yakko cut him off, "You see, this next procedure will be a lot like giving blood at a blood bank. Only you'll be giving a lot. And against your will. And uhhhh... It'll be significantly more painful!"

Yakko pulled a lever next to Plotz's table. The table suddenly rocketed backwards to the wall. Plotz found himself surrounded by mechanical parts and unknown machinery. Specialized clamps from the machine approached him, only the inside of these were lined with hundreds of tiny needles. He gasped and struggled, trying to get away from them as they approached closer.

The Warners followed, standing in front of him and snickering evilly.

"Behold, my Half-Toon Ichor Extraction Machine! Or the H-TIEM for short!" Yakko proudly proclaimed, "I've been saving this special little machine for when we finally succeed in creating a half-toon of your caliber. Now, you're going to feel a little pinch..."

The clamps suddenly came down on Plotz's body: two on his arms, two on his legs, one across his chest, and one across his neck. The pain was instantaneous; painful needle pricks all across where the clamps were positioned. He cried out loudly and struggled, but could barely move without tearing open the skin of his new toon body.

Dot cringed, "Ouch, that's gotta hurt."

Yakko snickered, "I don't think I need-le to explain why this is an unpleasant experiment!" He laughed at his own joke until he suddenly yelped. Dot had given him a small electric shock, followed by a harsh, unamused glare. Yakko rolled his eyes and muttered, "Everyone's a critic..."

Plotz's screams got their attention yet again, "Please...! Oh god this...! It hurts!! Please I'll do anything! I'm begging you please god, have mercy!!"

The Warners each stepped closer, close enough that their noses nearly touched Plotz's nose. Their glassy black eyes were cruel, cold, and dead.

"And where was your mercy when you locked us away for decades?" Yakko growled in his throat. He stepped away and threw another switch, activating the machine. The needles sunk deeper into Plotz's skin, drawing blood and quickly funnelling it into the machine. Plotz screamed for mercy, clearly in writhing agony. He didn't last long however, as the pain became far too much. He passed out and went silent, his body only twitching and spasming at the needles piercing his skin.

The Warners stepped away from Plotz, watching as the tubes of the H-TIEM filled up with an off-color red liquid. The tubes fed into three containers which slowly began to fill up with the vital fluids. They all seemed pleased by this.

"Once one of the containers are full," Yakko began, "I'll need one of you to volunteer for our last experiment." He immediately turned to Dot, "Dot, since you keep leaving your body to rot, it's only natural that we should use your cadaver to further the research."

Dot gasped in offense, "What?! Are you crazy?! And take the risk of you messing my body up even more?! No way! I don't think so!"

Yakko rolled his eyes and crossed his arms, "Hey, come on. It's not like you're using your body. Why not donate it to science? We need to make sure this will work properly before we continue with the plan."

Wakko suddenly raised his hand, "Ooh ooh! I'll do it!"

"Wakko, there's no need," Yakko sighed, "We have Dot's cadaver we can use. I would rather not accidentally kill my only living sibling during this procedure."

Wakko shrugged, appearing to not be bothered by the risk of dying, "That's okay. I trust you Yakko. And even if you mess up and kill me, I'll get to be a cool ghost like Dot!"

Dot grimaced, "You know what, I change my mind. I donate my body to science!!"

Yakko put his hand on Wakko's shoulder and patted him reassuringly, "It's alright, Dot. You clearly don't want to be the first test subject. Wakko is much more calm about it. So he shall be the first to undergo the procedure."

Dot groaned and threw her hands up in the air, "Ugh! I don't want one of my brothers to be a ghost! Then I won't be able to hide or win a game of tag with my ghost powers!"

"Well someone should have thought of that before she declined my offer!" Yakko shot back teasingly, "Wakko will be the first. End of discussion."

"Can I ask one thing?" Wakko piped up.

Yakko nodded, "Of course. Anything for my brother!"

"Can I get some of that laughing gas too? That looked like lots of fun!"

"Absolutely. I'll be making you as comfy as I can while I'm attempting the procedure. If you want some giggle gas, we'll make it happen!"

Yakko herded his siblings over to one of the closed off rooms, "Now come siblings! We have much work to do and not much time to do it!"