9
Over the following days she went every now and then to her favorite place to read, but every time she double-checked the position of the fake cover. Luckily she didn't have any more unwanted interruptions, so she could indulge in the adventures of the book, feeling as if she were the main character, somehow.
She was so thrilled by the book, at how carefully it described emotions between the lady and the pirate, moral dilemmas, but also the tensions between a sense of duty through reasoning and a passionate love through the heart.
On the other hand, she was quite upset about how a book affected her, as if it had awakened all possible hormones. She was no better than her colleagues from the University, she muttered to herself. For years she knew her friends had a different path than her, and she understood and respected that and vice versa.
However now, through the book, with every passionate encounter described in detail, it deeply affected her. Of course, she was clueless about the relationship between a man and a woman, and was not well versed. But a mixture the book and the Captain was a terrible combination for concentration and a peaceful sleep. She didn't have the same intense dream again and was thankful for that, but still she had a strange feeling that it would hit her again.
"Fraulein Maria, look, come here, hurry!"
She heard the panicked voice of Gretl, so in a rushed movement she hid the book in a branch, and ran off to the children. But there was no need for panic, it was more that the children wanted to share every moment with her.
That bond between them had started from their first two weeks together and it seemed to grow more and more. Even with the greater presence of the Captain during their studies or free time, she was still the first person with whom they wanted to share their enthusiasm or news, or some event.
Since his return from Vienna, Captain had been really genuinely trying to reconnect with the children, and although they were thrilled with it, they were still wary, like they all expect he would change and become the same again. But Maria had faith in him; she was sure he would never neglect them again.
It started with one child then the others, sharing their elated enthusiasm and soon they were in their own little beautiful world. She lost track of the time and soon they were all sitting at the dinner table, pleasantly chatting between bites and mostly listening to Max and his funny stories. She liked him very much, she connected with him instantly, compared to a certain Captain.
After dinner they moved to the living room, where they were all preoccupied, the Captain and his guests with drinks and chatting, while she and the children played cards and board games.
She was sat strategically with her back turned to the Captain, trying to avoid his wandering intense stare. Surely he was master in juggling and distraction, having grown up in the aristocracy. But in rare moments when she was not speaking, she was very observant about everything going on.
Every now and then his gaze would wander but return to her. Even though she was naïve she couldn't miss his scrutiny.
She was wondering what might happen now, since she was really well behaved and they hadn't quarreled in a long time. In her eyes, it looked like she had achieved a personal record, maybe she would get some kind of "good behaviour" medal to show sister Berthe, she mused.
Suddenly she was taken out from reverie by a strong, frightening, lightning strike, followed by a heavy downpour. Everyone screamed, except "his Majesty" of course, and all the children came to hug her. Almost immediately the boys withdrew feeling ashamed in front of their father. But he said the most beautiful thing to the boys, how he was scared too but lost his voice and winked at them.
Maria was so elated by his parental behaviour. But this time he saw her look of approval and looked up with his hard stare and she stayed still like a frozen chicken, until in the distance she heard somebody mentioned:
"Everything outside will be wet!".
Oh silly, silly, silly Maria, and in an instant she excused herself, practically jumping and in two steps was at the doorway before being stopped frozen by an authoritative voice:
"Where are you going Fraulein in such a hurry?"
She slowly turned and froze. That piercing stare and smug smile didn't look promising at all, reminding her of the previously lost battles and of utterly making a fool of herself, again.
"I, I hm, mmm, left something outside!" She tried to sound nonchalant, but with his deep stare she felt nothing of that and became more and more worried about the state of her precious book.
She quickly turned to leave as soon as possible, but then again she was stopped, by his deep voice: "If you are looking for some toys, Frau Smith, already brought them into the house!"
Turning again, with everyone staring at her she inwardly declared defeat: "I left a book outside that I have been reading, so excuse me!"
Hoping he would finally leave her alone she again started to turn. But again she was stopped, but this time by her shock, and stayed rooted to the floor, by his next sentence:
"Ah yes, the book you have been reading I found it and it's in my study, you can take it later!" he said it, with such ease, as if it was a recipe book.
Oh that scoundrel!
He had seen her and just waited for an opportunity. No chance anybody could find it, only if didn't exactly know what and where to search for. Probably seeing her terrified look, his smug smile replaced amusement.
For God sake, Elsa just went out minutes ago, to have a cigarette, why didn't he stop her? No, he just enjoyed torturing Maria! So she had no choice but to return with her tail tucked between her legs and hope he hadn't flipped through the book, but since he was the twin brother of Sister Berthe, she knew was not that lucky.
Someone might say that he, an old rake with a colorful past, had become enchanted or even obsessed with that mischievous and lively girl. That was ridiculous, for God sake, even he knew for himself that women were literally throwing themselves at him. No of course, he was not obssesed. She was just a governess and he was just concerned who was looking after his children. And totally accidentally she was reading while he was in study or he would have forced obligations or outings to finish during her time for reading.
Simply said, somebody had to pay attention to the children.
Every day around the same time she would come and read under an oak tree, hidden by a shadow of leaves, unaware of surroundings, deeply immersed in reading. And then he would wait for a feast for the eyes, and that would be her mysterious Mona Lisa smile and the different shades of pink spread all over on her face and fine lines of neck.
With his wild imagination and life experience, that was stimulating, indeed very stimulating.
But not every day was torture, just two days ago her path back to house had been intercepted by Brigitta who was wondering why she was all red in the face. Oh, that was so hilarious.
He had to practically cover his mouth from roaring with laugh, but she said something silly about not being used to so much sun, using her authority to avoid being asked another question like: "how is that possible after sitting in the shadow?" Oh, and her facial expression was hilarious, she was a terrible liar and left him the rest of the afternoon in good spirits.
But today he saw her run toward the children, with no book and just couldn't help himself, he had to see what she was reading about.
He wished he didn't.
So he spent the rest of the afternoon hidding in the study, flipping through the book.
Unfortunately.
He wished he hadn't.
Even he, with his fair share of sexual encounters was taken by the explicit descriptions of the passionate love making between the lady and the pirate. That damn book left him unbearable aroused, so much that he had to use a secret passage to his bedroom to hide his state and take a cold shower.
After he had finished his shower he was pondering two things. Firstly, why his governess was so annoyingly curious. She was a nun in training for God's sake, she was religious with a set path in her life, sure of her choice. Secondly, after she saw what was in the book why did she continue reading it? Was she caught up by the scandalous description, or would she be tempted to have her own experience?
Oh God, he could be her pirate.
With those tortured thoughts he declared defeat and did something he hadn't done in a very long time, he pleasured himself whispering her name hoping he could calm his ragged hormones.
Feeling utterly shameful with his actions he decided to forget everything especially his inappropriate thoughts and get back on track with his plans. Besides, she was just a curious young girl nothing else and soon she would end up in the Abbey and he would be happily married. He was brought back to reality from his reverie by Max, his friend the charming sponge who could be sometimes very observant.
"So Fraulein Maria, now I am curious what this book is that you were reading when you were ready to run outside after the downpour?"
Max asked slowly, sharpening his mustache between fingers with a sly smile. Oh, that scoundrel, Georg knew him well, he was after something and he would not leave her alone or him.
To her utter horror she blushed and froze, while opening and closing her mouth to think of any kind of excuse or title of the book, anything. Oh God, when would this torture stop and there was that look from "his Majesty" sitting like Cheshire cat with that smug smile. Oh earth, open up and swallow me! A thousand thoughts crossed her mind but not one with single title of a book. God help me!
"So Fraulein, what was it?" Max probed, already suspicious of her discomfort and the feverish look at Georg.
"It's a rare book, first edition, in Italian, Inferno by Dante Alighieri, that Fraulein Maria, has been reading!" Georg cut in. But suddenly aware of his huge, huge mistake, Georg inwardly cursed.
Damn! And here we go...
"Oh, I didn't know you speak Italian and Inferno no less, how convenient?" asked Max, visibly surprised, and already amused by the double meaning of the title. Yes, he knew his friend well, Inferno was appropriate title for his turmoil.
"She didn't!" someone said of the children who had been quietly watching the interaction until then, while Maria still squirmed.
"Last time in the bookstore we searched a German edition of Pinocchio and we couldn't find it!" Brigitta said, proud of her knowledge of books.
"Ah, that's one of the reasons why I want to learn Italian and besides it's a beautiful, melodic language!" Somehow Maria found her voice, covered with a huge beaming smile.
"Well then, Georg could teach you, he is very good and besides his crew was mostly Italian!" concluded Max but not without a smirk and wink to Georg. Yes, it was clear he was enjoying himself immensely and used the rare opportunity to take take the upper hand and make fun of him all while ignoring Georg murderous look.
"No, no I am not interested in, hm, military linguistic terms, more for everyday life!" she said boldly, having no other choice but play along with the game, feeling herself blush again, while fidgeted on the sofa.
"I mean thank you, but a friend of mine will help me!" she continued finally feeling on the right path. Hoping that would be the end of the discussion.
"Oh, that must be Luca!" Liesl exclaimed, with a huge grin and dreamy eyes. Maria gave her a confused look. She had said that only to stop the interrogation, she had totally forgotten about Luca.
"Oh yes, that friend of yours, a pirate, I like him!" Kurt added.
Georg instantly froze, feeling a green monster growing in his chest.
"A pirate? You know a pirate, Maria?" Elsa exclaimed, entering the room, showing a visible interest, glad that Maria had someone else's attention and vice versus. Hoping this discovery would keep Georg at a distance. Even she couldn't help but notice his growing attraction to the governess.
"He isn't a real pirate, of course, but he looks like one and dresses like that!" Kurt added with smile of adoration.
"Oh, well my dear, then what does he looks like?" Elsa probed, under the amused eyes of Max and an uncomfortable Georg, who was fidgeting in his chair.
"He is tall, with tanned skin, very handsome. He has dark ruffled hair which looks roguish, and a beautiful smile," Liesl added, quite clearly impressed with the young man.
"He reminds me of Father!" Louisa joined the discussion. She looked at her father with admiration, there was always a special bond with him.
"Yes he looks like Father!" The other children added excitedly with the same adoration, to Georg's great relief. At the same time Maria's head already was spinning from the spiral in which the discussion had gone. She was unable to stop or control it.
"But Luca isn't that old!" Gretl quipped with a child's honesty and naivety, oblivious of the sudden deathly silence, she had caused.
"Oh, really how old is he?" Laughing inwardly, Elsa tried to prolong the discussion and finally put things in their proper place and steer everything in the right direction.
"About Maria's age, but a little older though!" Friedrich joined the discussion.
"Oh, so it seems they could be a very good and suitable couple!" Elsa added, meaningfully raising an eyebrow, as she glanced from Maria, Georg and finally looking to Max. Oh, she was extremely satisfied with the information and the new development. For the first time feeling a real pleasure since she had come to Salzburg, and the ability manage the situation and not just be a mere observer as before.
"No, no we are just friends!"
Maria exclaimed, feeling extremely uncomfortable due to the implications of some kind of relationship for her future vocation. But at that moment, unexpectedly, while she glanced from Elsa to Georg she stopped to merely look at him. His expression was strange, he looked like Kurt when he lost a game and must admit defeat. Aware that he was caught for a moment, he immediately recovered and put on an unreadable mask, except for his eyes.
Oh my God, that look. Well, he looked furious as he had at the lake confrontation.
"Oh, my dear, friendship is always good solid basis for more, believe me I know that from experience," Elsa continued, looking significantly at Georg with coy and coquettish smile. But he was oblivious to her in his current state of mind with the sound of the elated children's whispers about the damn pirate.
But next sentence was the last straw.
"Yes, many wise people would say it's the language of love and passion!"
Max quipped with amused expression, trying to look nonchalant, but Georg knew better, he was mocking him.
Bastard.
Damn that book, damn that pirate, damn that annoying and curious governess. He was finally content and she was destroying everything.
"Fraulein it's time for the children to go to bed!" He looked acid and coldly at a blushing and astonished Maria, who murmured good night and left the room at lightning speed.
Avoiding further discussion about Maria's love life he excused himself by claiming tiredness and running off for some much needed solitude.
Entering the study room, he took off his jacket and tossed it on a chair. With even greater determination a tie that threatened to drown him from mentioning that blasted book and the damn pirate, then started unbuttoning the first few buttons of his shirt, he needed air.
He poured one, then a second glass of whiskey, and drank both in one gulp. With the third glass his trembling from his furious, enraged and mad state, finally calmed.
He tried to reasoning, after all his strategic mind never let him down. Why was he so infuriated? Was it because everything had gone out of control? Or, maybe she stirred something in him since the first time he saw her and challenged him?
Definitely it was that.
Worst of all, it was not a passing attraction. It had lasted from the first day, through Vienna until the present day. But he convinced himself that she was out of his reach, even when he discovered her with that book.
But now a new suspicion burned through him.
Maybe she was not as naive and innocent as he had thought. Maybe she imagined him as the same pirate from the book. Oh God, maybe she craved for him and fantasized about all the encounters from book and wanted to taste the intimacy of love before her vows. Not that there was anything between them except mutual respect and sparring matches, coloured by allure and attractiveness, all framed by her vocation and just friendship.
Had he lost his touch, did she think he was old, like Gretl had said?
He immediately felt stab in his chest. Although there was an age difference, women of all ages still threw themselves at him, after all he kept himself in good shape and only had a few gray hairs.
After his precise analysis of the all details, he realized that his male pride was most affected and that he had failed to notice her shock and disbelief at the mention of that scoundrel.
Maybe it was all just a coincidence, she didn't leave villa at all or wish to.
Wasn't it possible he had some feelings for her and was panicking in fear of losing her. No, that was impossible, one can love only once time in life, he was convinced. Beside it was just a matter of his pride nothing else. Feeling calmer after analyzing everything, he decided to go to sleep, feeling drained and exhausted.
Although he had reasoned everything, his subconscious had not let go. That night the nightmares began in which he rolled, spun, tossed and fought in a losing battle in which he watched someone else ravishing his Maria (in his dreams he admitted she belonged to him).
A real nightmare, no less.
Over the next few days the intensity of dreams and feeling of loss decreased and became just a shadow. It did not disappear but became bearable.
The book in the study stayed there permanently.
Neither Georg nor Maria wanted to mentioned it, hoping the events would be forgotten somehow. He wanted to forget his hurt male pride and horrified dreams in which he was actually the Captain in the book who lost his bride in front of his eyes, and she for feeling utterly ashamed being caugh treading that book.
The book was not mentioned at all.
But Maria was haunted by the look he had given her and which she couldn't understand.
xxx
So now you knows why this title :-) I hope you enjoyed reading this chapter as much as I writing.