AN: Here we are, another piece to this one.
I'm providing a trigger warning here for discussion of miscarriage.
I hope that you enjoy! Please don't forget to let me know what you think!
111
"Bleeding minimal to non-existent. Cramping minimal. Anxiety substantial. Tests to start. Appointment at 11 hours. I will arrive by 10 hours to begin testing."
Raffi stared at the message that came through on her personal device.
They were practically swimming with things to do. They'd accepted the mission on the Soñador the evening that the offer was made. As a requirement, they'd requested that Elnor be brought onboard. He had already been offered an internship position, and he was excited about the opportunities that would, in his words, be much more meaningful and beneficial than time spent in the classrooms and laboratories of Starfleet Academy.
For Seven and Raffi, several things had made their decision to accept the mission easier. B'Elanna Torres-Paris and her husband, Tom Paris, had accepted the mission in the corridors outside the meeting room. Even though there were other engineers that, arguably, could have helped with any issue that Seven might have, and though B'Elanna could check in with them when she was on shore leave or R and R, Raffi had nearly vomited to think of having her in the Delta Quadrant when they really needed her. Raffi still shook when she thought of what it had been like to see Seven's Borg systems shutting down, and there were simply certain aspects to this pregnancy that were entirely experimental.
The second definitive move toward making the decision they made was when they got home to find a non-urgent, but very-important (to use his words) message from the EMH. He had been asked to join the mission. There was some testing being done with a whole line of Mark Hologram models, and they wanted him to collaborate with the engineers on how to improve the models as they worked in real-time. Seven would have accepted another doctor, and Raffi was sure of that, but she wouldn't have been as comfortable with another doctor. Raffi needed her to have as much comfort as she absolutely could.
As a result of their decision to join the mission, and as a result of Seven's overall anxiety regarding their little ones, Seven's appointment had been moved up. By now, the cramping and bleeding were subsiding. She'd been told to expect it as part of the recovery from the procedure, and she'd been told to expect it as part of the full attachment of the embryos, but now it seemed that they might be able to check her progress. She would, of course, undergo a full medical, again, onboard the Soñador—as was simply Starfleet protocol when joining a mission and being seen by the ship's doctors—but she could at least be seen today.
When they left the appointment, they would have lunch, if time permitted, and they would have a meeting with B'Elanna, aboard the Soñador in its hangar, to discuss a few personal details of their accommodations.
"JL," Raffi said, tucking her personal device into her bag, "I know I said 11 today, but…is there any way that I can leave in twenty?"
"Did—something change about the appointment?" Picard asked from the desk where he was tying up loose ends to leave open work in the hands of Admiral Savok, who would be running most things in the absence of the other two currently acting Admirals.
Raffi had told him that Seven had an important appointment, and that she wanted to be there with Seven, but she hadn't given him the details of that appointment.
"They were able to move her into an earlier slot," Raffi said, putting on her best smile to cover the slight fib. She approached Picard's desk. She took part of the papers from the stack she was carrying, and she passed them over. "All of these are sorted by order of priority and I've made calls to delegate responsibilities. These remain to be done, but I can work on them tonight and make the calls first thing in the morning. Everything will be organized and ready to go by the time we leave."
Picard smiled at her.
"I have no doubt, Raffi, that your duties will be done, and that they will be done better than they could be done by anyone else. Your primary duty is, however, to your wife. You will not take those files home. The work can wait."
Raffi smiled at him.
"Thank you," she said, breathing out a sigh of relief that she wouldn't be up most of the night—while Seven regenerated, since she needed to do so on nearly a daily basis right now—trying to do the work. "We have a lot going on with the mission."
"As an old friend," Picard said, "may I say, without giving offense, that you look troubled, Raffi? Is there anything going on with you or Seven that may be of concern? If I can offer any assistance or…just an ear…?"
"No," Raffi said quickly. "Thank you, JL. Really. We're fine. We're just…busy."
"Leave now," Picard offered. He winked at her. "Get there a few minutes early. I'm sure the two of you will find a way to spend those extra few minutes together that is beneficial to you both."
Raffi smiled, thanked him, and wished him a good day, reminding him that she would finish her work as soon as she arrived the next morning. As soon as the door to his office closed behind her, she nearly ran to the transporter pad in his waiting area, transporting directly to the medical building where she would meet Seven for the appointment.
111
"Let me show you this," the Doctor said. He brought up a holo-image. Raffi looked at it, but she didn't really know what she was looking at. She was pretty confident that it didn't matter, the Doctor wouldn't miss the opportunity to explain it. "The reason that we had a little trouble getting the blood sample was this…"
"Which is?" Raffi asked. If Seven knew, she wasn't offering the information.
"Nanoprobes," the Doctor said. "Borg nanoprobes, to be specific. Seven's blood is currently swarming with them. It's actually truly impressive. I haven't seen this many in her blood since…"
"Since I was separated from the Collective," Seven offered. "Damaged."
"What does it mean?" Raffi asked.
"I'm not sure," the Doctor said. "At least—not exactly, but I have some theories."
"We want to hear them," Raffi pressed, when it was clear that the EMH was waiting for her to tell him just that.
"Seven produces the nanoprobes at all times," the Doctor said. "Now—the nanoprobes essentially work like tiny engineers. They move through Seven's body and make repairs to both her Borg systems and her human organs and systems. The healing ability of nanoprobes is, honestly, one reason why I tend to try to treat Seven myself. She kindly donates her blood for study and to help others who may need them for healing from certain illnesses or injuries, but there are some people who may be unscrupulous enough to take advantage of her for the nanoprobes."
"Remind me to keep her away from Ferengi. Duly noted," Raffi teased. "What are they repairing right now?"
"That's difficult to tell," the Doctor said. He looked like he was practically about to bubble over with excitement, though, so Raffi didn't figure that any of his theories were particularly horrible. "You see—there's more. When I ran the scan of Seven, I noticed two things that seem significant, even though I'm not certain whether or not they're related."
"Please, Doctor," Seven said. Her irritation came through in her tone of voice, and the Doctor smiled.
"The presence of so many busy nanoprobes also helps to explain why Seven is using so much energy and working her way through the hormones as quickly as you report," the Doctor said. "As we've said before, this pregnancy will be a fascinating piece of scientific study simply because, to our knowledge, there has never been a Borg pregnancy before. This is our first opportunity to witness its effects on the body. This may be the beginning of things that we'll be exploring. When I scanned Seven, I discovered that there is a new node in her brain—right here." He pointed to a spot on another holo-image that he brought up. "This wasn't here in her scans from two weeks ago. The nanoprobes appear to be building it. They're constructing new Borg nodes."
"I am becoming more Borg?" Seven asked.
Raffi felt her pulse pick up, more for the sound of Seven's concern than from her own actual worry.
"To some degree. You are—developing new Borg nodes and, possibly, implants. However, there is likely a functional reason for this node. It could be something related to the hormone regulation, or it may be related to the pregnancy."
"How will we know which?" Raffi asked.
"The reason for the new node isn't immediately important," the Doctor said. "I have taken scans of it, and I intend to study them. In the meantime, we'll contact B'Elanna and have her try to access the node. She may be able to get some information that I'm less skilled at pulling out of Seven's systems. Then, of course, we can compare notes and decide if there is anything to be concerned about."
"The nanoprobes in my body are building additional Borg parts," Seven said, "I think there is reason to be concerned."
"Not necessarily," the Doctor said. "The nanoprobes are programmed to make you function well. They are, essentially, caretakers and protectors. If they're choosing, in whatever way they're capable of doing so, to form some kind of node, it's very likely that it's in for your benefit."
"You said there was something else," Raffi said, anxious to end this at least until it had had time to sink in and they had some idea of what the node might be.
"I tried to scan Seven's uterus for imaging," the Doctor said. "This is what I found in my scans." He brought up another holo-image. As usual, Raffi wasn't really sure what she was seeing. "The nanoprobes are so concentrated in the uterine area that the scan was inconclusive."
"What do you think that means?" Seven asked.
"I tend to believe what B'Elanna suggested," the Doctor said. "You are adapting. Your Borg systems are recognizing your pregnancy, and they're working to strengthen you and protect your embryos. At any rate, I won't be able to continue my examination without using a sono-disc scanner. The images from the scan will have a greater magnification and, normally, they have a better resolution. I would like to do a physical examination, if you don't object, just to manually feel some things for myself, and then I would like to continue with the sono-disc."
Seven put up absolutely no argument at all about the examination. She subjected herself readily to it, and Raffi was pretty sure that she would have agreed to almost anything to have more knowledge of their babies. Raffi took her spot by Seven and, when she wasn't asked to move, she took Seven's hand and got comfortable while the doctor pressed and probed Seven's body with his fingertips. Then, she watched him work with the sono-disc scanner. It was a small disc shaped scanner that he could use to practically see into Seven's womb with almost the same kind of accuracy as the machine used during the implantation and attachment procedure.
Raffi watched the projection from the disc, as did Seven, while the Doctor worked. Raffi was amazed to see the slightly blurred look that was lent to the image by the presence of all the scurrying nanoprobes hard at work. The scanner was able to see through them, but not to erase their frantic movements entirely. Raffi thought to herself that, with all that activity going on inside her body, there was no reason to wonder why it was that Seven was feeling the need to regenerate nearly every single day.
"Oh dear," the Doctor said. He almost looked surprised at himself. Raffi could immediately see that something was wrong.
"What?" Seven asked. "What is it?"
"I'm afraid my programming has never quite offered a clear way to handle these things. I believe the preferred method is to ask if you would rather have the good news or the bad news first."
Raffi's stomach sunk. She could already feel the bad news. Somehow, she already knew what it was. She squeezed Seven's hand. Seven looked, she thought, a little pale and absolutely concerned.
"The good," Raffi said. "Sometimes—the good makes the bad go down a little easier."
The Doctor nodded. He put on a smile that was believable, but still looked pained—an absolute credit to B'Elanna's work with his programming. He brought up a specific image from the scanner.
"You have an embryo, here, that has fully attached. You can see, here, that it's lost the artificial cover, and it's fully attached to the uterine wall. The disc allows me to read some information, and I can report that everything is, at this stage, exactly as I would hope for it to be."
"It's healthy?" Raffi asked.
"As far as I'm capable of telling," the Doctor said. He laughed to himself, clearly enjoying his humor subroutines. "It has what appears to be an entire swarm of nano-nannies taking very careful care of it."
Raffi squeezed Seven's hand.
"And the bad?" She asked, when it was clear that Seven was going to leave her to be the one to handle everything.
"I'm sorry," the Doctor said. "But—there is only one embryo."
Raffi's stomach dropped, but something inside of her had already expected that, somehow. She felt like she'd prepared herself for it. The tears puddling in Seven's eyes said that, if she'd prepared for it, she hadn't been able to protect herself from the shock. Raffi felt her own throat tighten.
"I do not understand," Seven said. "What do you mean there is only one embryo? Where is my baby?"
Raffi touched Seven's face and turned it, even though she fought against her for a half of a second in the need to fight someone.
"Gone, Baby," Raffi offered. "The other one is…just gone."
Seven's chin quivered and Raffi knew she understood.
"As we discussed previously," the Doctor offered, "many of these procedures do not result in a viable pregnancy until the second or third cycle. I'm thrilled to report, however, that your pregnancy appears to be advancing well."
"My pregnancy is advancing well," Seven said, looking back at him, "but…one of my embryos is gone."
"It is common," he said, "that not all of the embryos attach. That's why it's common to use two or three embryos to ensure that you have a better chance of one permanently attaching and resulting in a viable pregnancy." He finished what he was doing, and moved to help Seven sit up. She wiped at her face, and he produced tissue for her.
"What did I do to…cause…this?" Seven asked. The Doctor looked fully sympathetic, even if he was truly incapable of such a feeling. He squeezed her arm.
"You didn't do anything," he said. "It's likely that—the embryo just never fully attached. Your body would have passed it without you noticing, more than likely, given the light bleeding and the cramping that you reported."
"The nanoprobes," Seven said. She let her voice trail off for a moment. "Did they…did I…?" She didn't finish. Maybe she couldn't. All Raffi could do was stand beside Seven and hug her from the side. She couldn't speak. She was afraid that her voice would crack—that she wouldn't be strong enough for Seven right now, simply because she couldn't handle Seven's pain and disappointment.
"The nanoprobes are, without a doubt, working to make sure that the remaining embryo has the best chance that any could ever have," the Doctor said. "I remain confident in what I said—your Borg systems may ultimately improve your pregnancy. Seven—neither you nor your Borg physiology was responsible for this. It's just something that happened. It's something that, unfortunately, we expected to happen."
"Expected or not," Raffi offered, "it's…not what we wanted. And—that's OK. We're going to…mourn our baby and…celebrate our baby. And…it's going to be OK."
Seven nodded, not wholly ready to commit.
"My remaining baby…is healthy?" Seven asked.
"Your remaining embryo looks very healthy," the Doctor said. "And it appears to be very comfortable in the care of excellent little nano-hands."