Johnny undressed himself as they stepped into the shower.
"Why wouldn't I be good to you? I'm you're boyfriend." Johnny softly chuckled, brushing her hair back from her face.
"Because nobody else I've ever dated has been this good to me. I know I don't have an extensive dating history but, I always thought there was something wrong with me." Lulu looked down at her feet, as warm water trickles over her back.
"There's nothing wrong with you...there never has been. There's a certain way you need to be loved and else got that before me. I'm sorry that you've been conditioned to think that. I love you, I couldn't imagine my life without you in it. Pentonville about killed me because I didn't know how you were doing, I couldn't see you. I had to rely on people like Lansing and Morgan. It was-hell. Literally hell. I don't ever want to go through that again." Johnny tilted her chin up and cupped her face in his hands, needing her to know how I felt.
"I love you, too. All of this has come way too soon after Logan-I don't want to go back to that place. I wanted to leave from the second I got there...everyday Scott would come into my room and try to strangle me to death. One time I actually thought he was going to succeed...it was awful. Jason and Nikolas were two of the only people who tried to help me, Sonny would just badger me every single time. I don't ever want to step foot there again." Lulu sighed, telling him a lot of stuff that he definitely wasn't aware of.
"What? Nobody put a stop to Scott Seeing you and putting his hands on you? Nobody ever told me that. Why weren't people helping you? You were in the most fragile state of you're life...and nobody made anything easy for you? What the fuck?" Johnny scoffed, pissed.
"You didn't? That's funny...because Claudia was there frequently." Lulu looked at me, confused.
"Was my sister there the time Scott almost strangled you?" I calmly asked, even though I was anything but calm.
"Johnny-"she started, but I shook my head.
"Just tell me." I sighed, knowing there was a reason she hadn't said anything.
"Yes. Claudia was there...she watched him for a few minutes before doing anything. Claudia told me that you're life would be easier without me-that you wouldn't be in Pentonville if it weren't for me. I don't know, I just started to think that she might be right so-I did try to do something a couple of times..." Lulu trailed off, obviously not wanting him to know this.
"Jesus Christ, nobody else saw this? Claudia was really fucking with you...and knew I couldn't do shit about it. I can't believe she'd stoop so low. My life wouldn't be mine without you in it and I am SO sorry you were made to think otherwise-I would have never brought you there if I had known that would happen to you. I just-I wanted to help you, I knew something was broken and I didn't know how to fix it. I can't believe the doctors didn't say or do anything-that's bullshit." Johnny's voice began to shake, terrifying thoughts of her not being her taunted his mind.
"Johnny, you couldn't have known what would happen. I was really sick and I needed help, I'm not saying Shadybrooke didn't help me but...they allowed things to happen that shouldn't have. Including allowing you're father into my room. When visiting hours were over-oh god, I really can't tell you this. I'm sorry." Lulu trailed off, biting her bottom lip so hard she started bleeding inside of her mouth.
"They allowed Anthony Zacchara...a certifiable mentally fucked individual, my father-to see you? What happened? I need you to tell me. From the way you're looking at me, I'm scared to find out." Johnny sighed noticing her hesitation.
"Anthony said that I had fucked you for the last time and I didn't know what he meant...until a nurse injected me with something like- I guess morphine? That's when you're father got out of his wheelchair and-"she started.
"Oh my fucking god-oh my god. There were always these rumors about my father being a pedophile but I never believed it until now...my family really fucked you up. How are you still able to be with me?" Johnny sighed, running a hand over his face.
"Johnny, you're not like them. You take care of me, you love me. I could never not be with you over things you had no control over. You've never set out to hurt me. Ever. Don't blame yourself. Please." Lulu reached up to touch his face, knowing he needed support right now.
"How can I not? Never mind me being good to you...how do you handle being with me?" Johnny sighs, trying to keep his tears at bay.
"Being with you is easy, I love you. You're the one person I can always count on. You hold me when I feel like I can't go on anymore, you do things around here for me, you make me laugh. When you kiss me, I feel like everything will be alright. You've never been hard to be with." Lulu sighed, knowing it would take him awhile to absorb all this information.
"You're an Angel." Was all he said, before walking her backwards into the water and beginning to wash her hair.
"See? That's exactly what I mean." Lulu smiled up at him.