Addiction - A Big Time Rush Fanfiction….

A/N - Well, this is my first Big Time Rush fanfiction. I have been a fan of the show since of January 2021 when they added it to Netflix, before I have never even heard of Big Time Rush but I instantly fell in love with the band and decided to write some fan fiction about it. This idea came to me randomly, and I thought, why not write it? It will help bring awareness and help people learn that these situations are out there and can happen to even the most unlikely people. The story is mainly around Kendall and the lessons of dealing with Hollywood pressure and turning to bad events to get relief. This story is to help people learn as Kendall learns, and hopefully help people open their eyes and minds and be safe and smart out there, not just in Hollywood but in the world in general.

I am putting this up as a test to see if people will read and like it; I will put this out today; however, I am going away from home for a week, so I won't be able to update for a week. I am going on vacation, and I wanted to let you, the readers know, so that's why I don't update right away. I will update you as soon as I get home from the fun times!

Anyway, this story is set towards the end of season two. Also, fair warnings, this story contains pressures situations, drug abuse, drug use, and strong mature themes in general.
Also, a lot of angst Kendall, nothing against him. Literally, I love him, he's one of my favorite members of the band, but there is still a lot of angst Kendall. If you don't like it, turn back, you have been warned. I am starting this story at a T rating but will bump it up to M if I need to, of you the readers think I need to!

Well, without more to say, I'm kind of generally excited about this story.

I own nothing from Big Time Rush! Nickelodeon owns all characters and settings, and songs.

This chapter had been Re-Written/Re-Edited as of (1/12/2022)

Chapter 1

"Here's Big Time Rush's song Boyfriend at number one on the top forty!"

"We're here with Big Time Rush!"

"Big Time Rush's concert in L.A sold-out tonight - "

"Boy Band, Big Time Rush will be on the morning tomorrow - "

"How do they do it? Big Time Rush is America's number one pop group!"

The fame was everywhere, and people were starting to recognize them, but it wasn't a bad thing at all. Oh no, it was a wonderful thing because it showed Kendall Knight, Logan Mitchell, James Dimond, and Carlos Garcia how far they have come since they started being Big Time Rush. Was it a lot to handle? At times it was; the boys found they couldn't go out in public anymore without a random fan coming up to them, asking for an autograph or picture. The paparazzi were no help either; they found themselves fighting them off weekly. But it wasn't all bad. Their first tour was coming up; it was called "All Over the World Tour," and the boys were honestly excited. It was going through many places all over the world. It was about six months, starting in London, going through parts of the USA, then in Canada, and ending in their current hometown L.A. At the moment, Big Time Rush was at the peak of its success.

Kendall Knight, of course, was very grateful. Three years ago, he had been in Minnesota, working a part-time job as a cart pusher outside their hometown local supermarket, making minimum wage while going to school full time and playing hockey. His mother during that time had been working two or more jobs trying to keep a roof over their heads and food on the table; his sister Katie struggled to understand what had even happened when their father walked out on them. But now, Kendall was making the money. They had their new apartment paid for, and new things came with being famous. Clothes, hairstyle, and heck, even most of the items in their apartment were from the money he made in the boy band. Sure, he was very grateful, but sometimes the pressure got to him. It got to him badly, but he usually hid his feelings from the others, not wanting them to worry, but he could tell they did. So he just smiled and continued with things as if nothing was wrong.

Being in a famous band wasn't always easy, especially when Kendall was considered the unofficial leader. Most days, he could handle it, but some days were hard. For example, with having their names more in the spotlight, things seem to have gotten worse, and their producer Gustavo Roque seemed to be on him twice as much as before. Usually, Kendall didn't let Gustavo bother him; But sometimes, the man still got to him. When our story started, it was a Tuesday at work, and on a typical workday, Kendall would start his day by watching tv that morning at breakfast, listening to the celebrity gossip channel when the host started talking about their band. Kendall usually rolled his eyes and laughed at the host, but today it was odd; the host started spreading rumors about them! One story included how Kendall, James, and Logan didn't like Carlos nor got along with him when that wasn't true at all. The host had used fellow Instagram posts and tweets from fellow fans who pulled evidence left and right that Carlos was a lousy band member and that Big time Rush should only be a trio. Kendall just shook his head, not believing it one bit. There was no way any of that was true, and it drove Kendall crazy on how people even came up with that kind of stuff. The gossip didn't make Kendall happy at all; it only made him sad to think that their fans even made that conspiracy up in the first place. But after shutting the news off, Kendall found himself going to the studio with Logan, Carlos, and James for that afternoon.

The boys found themselves in the dance studio that afternoon, and this was when Gustavo was starting to get on Kendall's nerves. Dance rehearsals were in full swing today, and so far, the boys had been working for about four to five hours on their dance numbers. Kendall was starting to get tired during this time, and his bandmates were too. But Gustavo didn't want to let them stop until they had the dance down perfectly, but no matter what the boys tried, it didn't seem to be good enough for their producer. Once more, the music started, and the four did the choreograph that Mr. X had shown them. Being tired, Kendall was started to lose his concentration and balance; this had caused him to trip and almost fall. Luckily he caught himself and went to continue as if nothing happened but…

"Woah, Woah, stop! STOP!" Gustavo yells, hitting the off button on the music track. He looks through the window and exclaims, "KENDALL, WHAT WAS THAT!? YOU NEVER TRIP!" Gustavo yells as he eyes the boy with annoyance.

"Sorry it won't happen again; I'm getting tired. We've been at this for hours - " Kendall begins, not realizing his mistake in words until Gustavo got up from his chair and started storming into the dance studio. Kendall, Carlos, Logan, and James all cringed back a little at the man bursting through the door.

"You tired, are you!?" Gustavo questions as he crosses his arms and glares at the boys. "Well, let me tell you that this is just the beginning! Do you think rehearsals are hard? Wait until your on the actual tour!" Gustavo exclaims as he frowns and sighs. "On tour, you can not make a mistake! Thousands of people are paying money to see you dance and sing your little hearts out, and they will record you." Gustavo finishes explaining as he shakes his head at them.

"I know that; you've been telling us this for a week, but can't you just let us take a break?" Kendall questions as he frowns. "I'm sure the other guys are getting tired too…." Kendall trails off when he sees Gustavo staring him down; an unhappy look is on the man's face.

Before any of the guys knew what was happening, Gustavo started screaming at Kendall. Somehow, being shouted at a lot this week seemed to be happening. As Kendall stood in the middle of the studio getting yelled at by his boss for being a big baby about things, he wanted to cry. Of course, he didn't, not in front of Gustavo nor his three friends; he was the leader; after all, he had to be strong in front of everyone. Plus, the confrontation between him and Gustavo usually only made him laugh, but today Kendall wasn't having a good day as it was, and the boy didn't want to hear it. But, the worst happened when he heard the last of the boss man's rant.

" - AND I COULD SEND YOU BACK TO MINNESOTA IF I WANTED! SO SHAPE UP BECAUSE YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE MY FIRE! I CAN'T HAVE MY FIRE BURNING OUT! SO GET IT TOGETHER, OR I WILL EASILY REPLACE YOU! YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE THE TOP DOG HERE, SO ACT LIKE IT AND NOT A WHINY FIVE-YEAR-OLD!" Gustavo yells, making everyone in the whole room go quiet.

Kendall feels slightly hurt and angry at this. Feeling his heart racing and his breathing pick, he starts to feel a little dizzy. The pressure was consuming him, and he had enough of it. Gustavo wants him to be the perfect boy bandleader with the pressure to be the perfect boy band leader. Kendall was getting sick of the whole charade, plus the pressure to be the ideal perfect celebrity the media wants him to be. Ignoring Gustavo, who was now trying to get his attention, Kendall has made up his mind and started making his way out of the studio. Running out of the studio, Kendall runs down the street, thinking of where to go. After deciding, he headed in the opposite direction of the palm woods with no destination really in mind.

By the time he stopped to catch his breath, he had ended up somewhere in the middle of downtown Los Angeles. Stopping at a sidewalk vending machine, Kendall got out some money and got a bottle of water. Looking around, Kendall looks for a place to sit, and he only finds one spot open at the end of a bench that an older man already occupied. With no other choice, Kendall sat down in the open seat, and this caused the man to take a quick look at him. Kendall looked at the older man, who had grey hair, sunglasses, a white t-shirt, and plain shorts. He also carried a cane and wore a hat, and he too must've been traveling on his own, so he took a break. Kendall looks forward after taking a good look, trying to ignore the man's presence, but the older man seems to think otherwise and decided to speak up.

"Seems like something's troubling you." The older man spoke as he looked back at Kendall.

The voice sent chills down Kendall's spine. Kendall looks up, though, and says after a drink of his water, "Just pressure, that's all…." Kendall mutters, hoping if he answered, the man would leave him alone; unfortunately, luck wasn't on the blonde-haired boy's side that day.

"Hollywood pressure hu? That happens to all of us…." Smiling softly at the young boy before him, the man smirks and says while digging into his shorts pocket for something he continues. "...All work and no play. Don't feel appreciated for the devotion you putting in? The pressure causes you to have anxiety and doubts…." The older man finishes as he pulls something out of his pocket.

Kendall chuckles, "Seems like you've hit the nail on my problems." He watches the old make take something from the bottle he had pulled out of his pocket. The young boy frowns, "I'm sorry for asking, but what is that you just took?" Kendall raises an eyebrow.

The older man eyes the young boy then thinks about what was asked; he holds up the bottle. "Oh, these? These are anxiety pills. Like you, boy, I get tired of the pressure of having a perfect life. These help me function. It calms my thoughts and nerves, so I haven't stressed out. Would you like to try some? You can have these…here…" The older man hands Kendall the bottle.

"I don't know…." Kendall states that as he reads the label on the bottle, it says prescription medicine. Frowning, the boy says, "...You need these, don't you? And…And…" Kendall takes deep breaths; holding the bottle makes him nervous, and he frowns at the feelings. So, Kendall hands the older man the bottle back, but the man always pulls. "...Take it, I don't want it."

The older man is taken back as he is tossed the pill bottle. Catching it, he frowns, "You haven't even given it a try." He says to the teen as he eyes the boy. "I promise you it's safe; it's over the counter. Otherwise, I wouldn't be taking it myself."

"If it's over the counter, I can get my mom to get it for me."

"You might not be able to afford it, and it is a bit expensive over-the-counter medication. I can sell it to you for forty bucks; that's all I'm asking; I pay almost eighty for mine, I'm only asking half price. It's a good deal. Try it, and if you don't like it, you can find me and get a refund, is that fair? Please, I also need the money, or I can't get on the bus to get home…."

Kendall is surprised at the information. The young teen tries to decide what to do, the older man gives him the bottle back, and Kendall looks it over. If it was over-the-counter anxiety medication and this random older man was taking it, it would be safe for him, too, right? What was the harm? Plus, the man did need to get home, so sparing a little cash couldn't hurt, and he could get a refund if he didn't like it. But what would his mom think if she found out? The guys, Katie? Gustavo and Kelly? Oh, wait, he's mad at them right now...well, at Gustavo and Kelly, Kendall reaches for his wallet with a big sigh after finally making his mind up. He pulls it out and gets forty bucks out, having fifty on him. He hands the man the money, and the man gladly takes it from him.

"Good luck kid, I hope it helps you." The older man nods as he gets up to leave.

Kendall was too busy looking at the bottle though that was now in his possession; he didn't even notice the man leave. He thinks, "Wait, how do I contact you if it - "

He begins to say as he looks up to see the man is gone; he sighs and finishes, " - doesn't help me so I can get a refund?"

Kendall looks over the bottle in thought with the older man gone. Taking a break from looking at it, he checks his watch and sees it's getting close to dinner time. Deciding not to make his mother worry more then she probably was, Kendall stands up and gets ready to head back to the Palmwoods. Before walking, Kendall decided to take one of the white pills; where was the harm? After the boy takes it, he puts the bottle in his pocket and heads home. Kendall didn't know that the pill was not one you would want to take from a random stranger on the street. Little did he know; how much his life would change just from taking that small pill…

A/N - A quick note at the end, thank you all for reading; please remember to review, follow and favorite! I am hoping to continue this story soon!
Just as I had said earlier, I am going on vacation for a week; I will not be able to update until I get back, but as soon as I get back and if people want more, I will update asap!

Thank you all so much for understanding! The update will come soon! I hope you liked the story! = BTRFanatic13