Authors Note
I wrote this chapter late one night, and by late, I mean it was 2 am. I have to tell myself not to drink coffee so late at night, this isn't the first time, and it probably won't be the last. I'm pretty stupid. But the other long time writing this chapter was by riding in the car, not the easiest, but I made it work. There are only 57 days till my wedding, and I'm getting more and more excited with each passing day, but there's so much more planning to do. But anyway, I'm hoping you guys enjoyed the last chapter. There is more in this chapter, but don't expect there to be sexual content in every chapter. Also, there is no Victoria Secret in Port Angeles, but for story sake, let's just say there is. Alley Cat and Moxie Boutique do exist, though. Legal disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.
Marigold
Lily POV
(March 4th, 2005)
"Dinners ready," I yell out, placing the plate of burgers on the table. I hear Bella coming down the stairs. She had been up there since I got home, doing homework, I guess. Dad was the first to walk in the kitchen, and his face broke out in a smile.
"Your famous burgers. You haven't made them in a while. I apricated it." He sat down at the table and took one of the burgers off the platter. He went to take a bite, and I lightly slapped him on the shoulder.
"No eating till Bella sits down." As if she was summoned like a demon, she walked into the kitchen. I sat down and placed a burger on my own plate.
Bella sat down and gave us a small smile. "You don't have to wait for me. I'm sure dad's hungry."
"It's bad manners to eat without everyone being present. Plus, dad would polish off all the burgers before you get a chance." I laughed out.
"Hey, it's not might fault that your burgers are legendary." Dad protested in return to my teasing. "Now, can I eat my damn burger before it gets cold?"
"Yes, yes, you may," I replied, and Bella raised a questioning eyebrow.
"What makes these burgers so legendary?"
"That's a trade secret, Bella. Only one other person knows the exact recipe." I said in a voice that gave the impression of this being top-secret information.
"And who is that?"
I had taken a bite of my burger, and it took me a second to respond. "Allison Uley. I hang out at her house a lot. She means a lot to me. She was the one who taught me how to knit." Dad had a shocked look on his face. He knew that my burger secret was precious but then nodded his head, not bringing up the real reason that I probably had given her the information.
Bella looked impressed at my skill. "Oh, that's cool. I didn't know you could knit. Mom tried to teach me once. It was terrible. I just couldn't get the hang of it. But it could be because she wasn't that good either."
I smiled, and my voice came out in adoration. Allison was the mother I always wanted, and while we hadn't been together as often as I wanted, I knew that she would always be there for me. She and Sam were my rocks; I knew I could lean on them when times were hard. When I was struggling with the weight of the world. "It takes a great teacher to learn and a lot of patience."
Bella nodded and turned her attention to her food. Dinner was eaten in silence, but it wasn't an awkward or tense silence. It was peaceful. It didn't take long for everyone to finish their food with dad going in for seconds. Bella looked pensive and a little bit nervous. "Bella, is there something wrong? Did something happen at school?" I ask, hoping to get to the bottom of her thoughts. She sighed and turned to me.
"Well, actually, I was asked if I wanted to go to La Push tomorrow with a group of friends. I was wondering if you wanted to go as long as you have the day off? It would be nice to spend time together, as long as you don't mind a couple other people. I asked Edward, but he said he couldn't go."
I scoffed playfully. "Nice to know I'm your second choice. But I would love to go, and luckily I do have the day off tomorrow; the weather is supposed to be somewhat nice." I would have to call Sam and tell him about the change of plans. I had planned to spend the day at Allison's catching up with her and then spend the night at Sam's. I had started to leave some clothes and work scrubs at his house for when I spent the night. Spending the night, there had begun to be a regular accordance. I had suspicions that dad knew what me and Sam were doing when I spent the night, but like usual, dad didn't bring it up, trusting me that I was making smart decisions.
Bella rushed out her next statement as if she was making sure that I wasn't really offended. "It's nothing like that. I was planning to ask you anyway. I really didn't want to have to sit in Tyler's car, and I definitely didn't want to ride with Mike."
"Why?"
Bella replied in a frustrated voice. "He's annoying, and ever since the accident, Tyler has constantly been apologizing. So you sure you want to spend the day with a bunch of high schoolers?"
"I don't mind. It would be nice to get to know your friends." I said with a smile. It was true, and besides, I didn't want to leave Bella alone with Mike Newton. I had no proof that he would hurt her, but I could never trust a Newton. Luke had never contacted me or been around me since my attack. I guess he knew that I could go to the police if he tried again. I bet he was still waiting on the day I would. There was also a witness that would testify that he tried to rape me. And with my dad being the chief, it would undoubtedly be taken extremely seriously.
Dad spoke up after a cough. "Well, it's good you two are spending time together. I'll be gone for the day. I'm going fishing with Billy and Harry. So I probably won't be home for dinner."
Me and Bella nodded. "Let me clean up since you cooked. It's only fair." Bella stated as she got up from the table, grabbing a few plates and heading towards the sink. Dad got up after and headed to the living room, probably to watch the game. I faked a yawn.
"I'm going to head to bed. Night." I chorus of nights came out, and I headed up the stairs. Walking into my room, I immediately headed to my cell phone that was on my bed stand charging. I unplugged it from the charger and laid down on the bed. I pressed speed dial and listened to the phone ringing.
"Hey, baby. I miss you. Is there something you want? Or are you just calling to hear my voice?" He said in a teasing tone.
I grinned at his joking manner. He could always brighten my day by just hearing his voice. "I miss you too. I'm actually calling about tomorrow."
"What can't wait? You want to come down now? I'm always open for you to be here." He said, seductively dropping his voice. His voice made my body tingle.
I sighed and debated telling Bella that I couldn't come, maybe fake being sick. But I wanted to spend the day with her, and his suggestions weren't making it easy. "There's been a change of plans."
"Oh." He replied, and I could tell he was disappointed and a bit worried. So was I nervous, I mean. I was really looking forward to tomorrow.
"Bella asked me to go to La Push beach tomorrow, and I took her up on it. It's not that I don't want to see you, but I need to be with her tomorrow. I'm sorry, sweetie."
"That's alright. I understand. You should spend time with your sister. You've been spending a lot of time with me, and it's not fair for me to be selfish with your time. Go have fun with your sister."
"Are you sure? I can tell her no."
"No, you should have fun with her and spending the day with her." He said in a calm and understanding voice. He always had a way of making sure I felt confident in my decisions.
"Okay, then. I should go to bed, I don't know when we're leaving." Suddenly there was a knock on my door, and Bella came in.
Bella paused and noticed the phone pressed up against my ear. "Are you talking to Leah? I'm sorry. I can come back."
I waved my hand in a motion that said it was alright. Placing the phone down on the bed. "No, it's fine. What do you need, Bella?" I emphasized the name to make sure Sam knew to stay quiet, not wanting Bella to hear a male voice coming through the speaker.
"I just wanted to tell you that we're all meeting up at noon at the school. Angela just called to remind me."
"That's good. I was just about to go to sleep anyway. I'll probably be up early like usual."
She stood there awkwardly for a moment, and slowly responded. "Well, I'll leave you to talk to Leah. Tell her, I say, Hi."
"Will do. Good night Bella."
"Good night Lily." With that, she walked back out the door. I picked up the phone again to continue talking.
"Sorry about that."
"You still haven't told Bella about me? Why?" Sam said in a questioning tone but not in anger but confusion.
"I don't know if I can trust her to keep the secret to herself, and besides, you know the fewer people who know, the better. I'm still worried about Paul and Jared knowing." I frowned and replied sadly.
"They won't tell baby. They know that this isn't something that anyone should know at the moment. Besides, your threat of never feeding them again is definitely an incentive for them to keep their mouths shut." It was true that after I had fed them for the first time, I declared that they would never be feed again if they reviled our secret. They immediately agreed to keep our secret. After that, whenever I was at Sam's, they would come over to eat somehow, knowing I was there. Sam was mostly annoyed that some of our private time was gone and that Paul continuously hit on me. But I would just laugh it off and give Sam a kiss to reassure him that I was his only.
I laughed, and my smile came back. "Like most men, they think through their stomachs."
"That and other parts."
"You definitely think with the other part very often." my voice coming out in a husky way.
His voice dropped again. "It's not my fault that you are the most tempting creature. I mean, you were perfectly made for me. How can I not think with my cock?"
I gave a quiet moan. "I need to get off this phone before you tempt me to come over."
"I mean, it wouldn't be the worst thing."
"Good night Sam. I love you." I laughed.
"Good night, my Ana." With that, I hung up the phone and placed it back on the charger. I changed into my nightclothes. They had recently changed to include an oversized sweatshirt that was Sam's. I had begun to steal his clothing, which he had just laughed at. I snuggled into bed and gradually fell into a deep sleep.
Lily POV
(March 5th, 2005)
"Are you sure you don't want me to try and teach you how to surf?" I said as I drove to the high school.
"I rather not break a limb today or drown today." She stated. I chuckled and nodded my head. I wasn't going to pick up my surfboard anyway. That would mean I could possibly see Leah, and while we had talked on the phone several times, we hadn't seen each other in several months. I was trying to avoid her because I wasn't sure I could keep quiet about Sam and me if I saw her in person. This secret was slowly killing me. It was like a poising slowly and painfully creeping up and infecting my soul.
Bella broke my thoughts. "Is everything alright, Lily? You kinda spaced out."
"Yeah, sorry. Oh, look, we're here." I said, hoping that Bella wouldn't press too much on the why I got lost in my own thoughts.
I pulled up to the other cars, parked, got out, and looked at Bella's friends. They were staring at me. Probably wondering what I was doing there. "Bella. Who is this?" A geeky looking boy with black hair asked, looking me up and down.
"This is my older sister Lily. I asked her to come along. I hope you all don't mind." Bella responded shyly, Hoping it truly wouldn't be a problem.
"No, of course not." The boy I recognized as Tyler replied, looking kinda nervous. Good, he should be scared of me. I mean, he almost killed my sister.
"Are you riding with us or are you driving yourself." A shrieking voice questioned. Her voice was like nails on a chalkboard. I turned to see a long-haired blonde bimbo-looking, girl. I immediately knew I would hate this girl. She seemed like a bitch. From what Bella had told me when she ranted about the girl, this was Lauren.
"I'm driving myself and Bella. There's not a lot of room in the back, so it'll be just the two of us." I replied with a small smile. The boys looked disappointed that Bella and me would not be riding in the same car; the boys were not subtle when it came to checking me out. It made me feel awkward and kind of dirty. Only Sam should be thinking about me in that way.
"We should start heading to La Push." A quiet voice broke through. I saw a tall, light brown girl walking up to the van. I sighed in relief and headed back to the car with Bella following me. The drive didn't take long, and Bella and I mainly sang along at the top of our lungs to the radio. We started laughing at the ridiculously at our behavior. We pulled up to the parking lot, and we all got out of our cars.
"The weather looks perfect for surfing. The waves are huge." Another girl with dark brown hair announced. She was wearing a wetsuit and looked like she was excited to jump into the waves.
"Lily, are you surfing too? I'm Erick, by the way." The geeky boy stretched his head his hand out for me to shake.
I shook my head and lightly grabbed his hand and accepted his handshake. "No, my surfboard is at a friend's house, and I didn't bring my wet suit. Plus, today is all about making sure Bella doesn't get injured."
"I'd be fine, Lily. I'm not that clumsy." Bella replied with a whine.
"Yes, you are," I said teasingly.
"Why don't we go for a walk to the tide pools? Oh, and I'm Angela." The girl gave me a small smile.
"I'll join you. Mike, by the way." I could immediately see the similarities between the two brothers. It made me tense up. I hadn't been back at the beach since that day. I felt kind of raw. I could feel the panic grow. I tried to push down that feeling and push the thoughts from my mind. But the more I was around Mike, the more I thought of Luke.
I shook the feeling. I shouldn't have agreed to come. "Why don't you begin setting up the bonfire, Mike?"
Mike made a disappointed face, but he must have seen the look on mine, which brokered no arguments and sadly backed down. "Shall we head to the tide pools?" I said while heading down the stairs to the beach. Bella and Angela followed me talking about a recent assignment. They continued talking until we heard a voice call out.
"Bella! Hey Bella! Wait up!" We all turned around to see three russet skin males run up to us. They looked several years younger than us, but I immediately recognized one of them.
"Well, if it isn't little Jakey." I goaded.
"Don't call me that, Lily." Jake snapped with a deep flush on his face. I laughed at his embarrassment.
"I've known you since you were in diapers, helped change a few too, I can call you anything I want." I laughed. His blush got even deeper. But he then shifted to look at Bella.
"Do you remember me?" He questioned. Bella took a second and nodded.
"We made mud pies together. You flung them in my hair. Dad said, you also fixed my truck. Thanks for that, by the way." Angela snickered under her hand, trying not to be rude. I made up for her by snorting.
Jacob replied with a smirk. "You started that if I remember correctly, and it was no problem. I like working on cars."
"You should keep Bella company. Her date bailed." Angela said, looking the boys up and down.
Jacob rushed out a "Who was your date?"
"Edward Cullen and It wasn't a date, Angela, I was just nice."
Angela was the next to speak up. "I think it's nice, no one ever invites him places."
A tall boy, almost as tall as Sam with long black hair, spoke up. "The Cullen's don't come here. Jake, I think that Me and Quil will head back to help with the bonfire." His undertone was that of letting Jake have some alone time with Bella.
"Sure, Sure."
Bella looked like she was confused but also like she had a plan. I raised an eyebrow, but I didn't say anything. We started walking again with Bella and Jacob bringing up the rear. I could overhear their conversation and could hear that she was making a terrible offense of extremely bad flirting. Something was up, and I needed to know what it was. I looked around. We were too close to the forest line. I felt my breathing pick up.
"Shut up, you stupid whore."
I felt dizzy. I felt scared. I was trapped in my memories. I could feel hands on me, squeezing my throat, even though no one was around. I couldn't breathe, I couldn't break free. I thought it was over, I thought I was strong, but here I was cowering. My arms wrapped around myself to try and stop the shaking. My knee's buckled under the weight. I felt a hand touch my shoulder from behind, I screamed.
"Lily, Lily. It's okay. It's just me." I heard Bella's voice breakthrough.
I shook my head, clearing my mind. "Are you okay?" Bella asked in a worried tone.
"Oh yeah, sorry," I responded quietly.
"You sure, you spaced out for a while. You looked like you were about to pass out."
Angela also looked worried at my behavior but just nodded in agreement. "I'm fine, Bella. Just, I need to make a phone call. My phone's in my car. I'll see you at the bonfire." I stuttered out and began to walk back to my car. I more or less ran to my car, not wanting to be around the tide pools any longer. I could feel Bella's eyes on me, but I wouldn't turn around, and I wouldn't ever explain my actions, but I knew she would bug me about it later. I got to my car and got in it, not wanting anyone to hear my conversation. I shakenly dialed the phone, praying Sam was off of patrol already.
"Hey, babe, what are you doing calling me? I thought you were with your sister for the day?" The dam broke, and my breathing became out of control. "Baby, Baby, what's wrong?" Sam's voice was concerned, I heard it in his voice.
I couldn't speak. I just made tight noises. "Baby, you need to breathe and tell me what's wrong. I need you to calm down. Just breath. Listen to my voice." I listened to his voice and matched his breathing. It took a few moments, but I was eventually able to calm down enough to speak.
"'Bella and I.' I took another deep breath, 'Went to the tide pools.' Another pause for a shallow breath. 'I couldn't stop.' I sobbed, ripped out. 'The memories. I couldn't stop the memory's'" I couldn't stop the crying, I wanted to scream, let everything out, but I wouldn't raise suspicions. A screaming girl in a car would bring someone to check on me.
He responded in a calm voice. "Oh, baby, I'm so sorry. There's no shame in being afraid. Do you want me to come down to the beach?"
I quickly shook my head, sniffing, even though I knew he couldn't see me. "No, I just. I just need to hear your voice. I need to feel safe again. If you come, there will be questions. I don't think I could stay away if you were here. I thought I was stronger that I put it behind me."
"Alright, I understand. I disagree, I want to be there so badly to comfort you and to support you. I'm always here for you, whether in person or not. I'll always protect you. You are the strongest person I know. You are a survivor."
I let go of a deep breath, I whispered. "Thank you. I love you, I love you so much."
"I love you too, darling."
I knock on my windshield caused me to jump. I turned to see Leah standing outside. "I gotta go." I quickly hung up before Sam could respond. I rolled down the window. "Leah, what are you doing here?" I rushed out.
"I heard about a party. Thought I would check it out, then I saw your car and you in it. Who were you talking to? Have you been crying?" Leah said while raising her eyebrow.
"Just Dad. No, it's just allergies."
"Okay, then. Hey, I know we haven't spent much time together recently, but I was wondering if you wanted to hang out after work tomorrow. We can go to Port Angeles, go shopping."
I debated the option. We really hadn't spent a lot of time together, and it was killing me to see our relationship suffer. But I knew that my secret was just that a secret. I wasn't ready to expose us yet. "That sounds great, Leah." I decided to get out of my car, leaving my phone in the car. I gave her a hug and felt my stress out leave my body. "I've missed you."
I felt her give me a tight squeeze back. "I've missed you too. Let's head down to the fire. It's frigid." She threw an arm around my shoulder, and we head down to the fire. It was burning a bright blue due to the driftwood. It was a beautiful sight. I saw Bella walking back, and she looked spaced out, her mind running a mile a minute. I was wondering what Jacob could have told her while I was gone.
Me and Leah spent the night catching up, laughing at each other's jokes. The whole time Sam was in the back of my mind. I lost track of time, and it wasn't until Bella came up to me and told me we should go. "I'll see you tomorrow Leah."
"Alright, see you tomorrow."
Bella and I walked in silence, but I knew she had something she wanted to say. Climbing into the car, I kicked on the heat to help warm up the cold cab. "Lily, would you tell me what the hell happened by the tide pool."
I sighed and shook my head. "It's nothing that you should worry about."
Bella pressed the issue. "You were really freaked out, though. Looked like you saw a ghost."
"Bella, just drop it. It's nothing that you need to know. Leave it alone." I snapped. I immediately felt bad. "Look, I'm sorry, but this is not something you need to worry about. I promise."
Bella nodded, although she kept looking at me strangely like she was trying to figure out a puzzle by herself. "You know, Jacob told me something interesting."
"And what's that?"
I tensed, not knowing what was about to come out of her mouth. "He told me some legends. Apparently, the tribe comes from wolves, and that they have one natural enemy. They are called the cold ones."
My hands gripped the steering wheel tightly. I was cursing Jake in my mind. He knew that telling the legends was forbidden. There was only one exception, but here he goes exposing the secret just because of a crush. "That's an interesting story."
"It goes deeper apparently a coven of cold ones made a treaty with the wolves to stay off Quileute land. But the most interesting part is the legend say that the coven was actually the Cullen's."
Double damn, I'll kill him. If Sam doesn't kill him first. Bella was already suspicious; he basically told her everything. I have to warn them. I'll pull Carlisle aside tomorrow. "Bella, it's just a story. There's no way the Cullen's are that old or these supposed cold ones."
Bella shook her head. "But it all makes sense."
"Bella, again, it's just a story," I responded with a severe tone.
Bella looked at my face and knew I would budge on the fact. The rest of the car ride was silent, an extremely awkward silence. We got out of the car with Bella, slammed the car door, and stormed up the stairs. I sighed. Everything was going to shit.
Lily POV
(March 6th, 2005)
I hadn't gotten a chance to talk to Carlisle all day. It was getting close to the time that I would be off. I had been stressing all day. I needed to tell him that Bella was getting closer to knowing what they are. I needed to help protect their secret because if she can discover the Cullen's secret, she could figure out the packs. I had called Sam late last night and told him Jacob had told her the legends. Sam and cussed out a storm and said if he phased that he would order him to keep his mouth shut, I've never seen him so angry.
"Helen is Doctor Cullen in his office?" I prayed he would be.
Helen looked up from her paperwork, checking over charts, and printing out the forms. "He is. He's leaving soon, though."
I nodded my head. "I have to talk to him, then I'll be out of here."
"You sound excited. Any plans?" Helen had raised an eyebrow and asked in a questioning tone.
I smiled brightly. "Me and Leah have plans to go shopping in Port Angeles."
"That sounds exciting. Well, have a good time." Helen returned to her paperwork after shooting me a smile.
I walked fastly to Carlisle's office. I didn't have much time. Knocking on his door, I heard a soft "Come in."
I entered the room and saw Carlisle sitting down at his desk. His office was neat and tidy, and his paperwork was filed in straight piles. "Lily. What are you doing here?"
I sighed and sat down on one of the two chair chairs facing his desk. He continued on his paperwork. "Bella's getting closer to the truth."
Carlisle put down his pen and looked into my eyes; he had a worried look on his face, a frown quickly crossed his face. "How do you know this, and how close is she?"
"Jacob told Bella the legends of the Quileute tribe. She's linking it to the questions she already has."
His frown grew deeper. "Isn't telling the legends to an outsider is forbidden. The tribe promised to not reveal our secret."
I scoffed. "They think it is no more than a legend now, and Jacob isn't the brightest. I've known him since he was little; he's always had a crush on Bella. He would do anything to impress her."
"Is there nothing you can do to persuade her that they are just stories and to give up on searching for the truth?"
Shaking my head violently, I responded. "From what I learned in the time she's been here, she's like a bloodhound. She won't stop looking for the truth."
Carlisle showed no emotion. "I'll inform my family. Thank you for the information."
Standing up, I walked to the door. I turned around to have one final say. "I'll protect my family. You protect yours."
Carlisle nodded, understanding the deeper meaning behind the words. I sighed as I left but hurried to the exit. We were meeting at the hospital then taking my car to Port Angeles. I took a breath of the fresh air; twilight was slowly coming. I saw Leah standing by my car. "Leah!"
"Lily!" She responded in a tone just as excited. "You ready?"
"More than ready," I said, unlocking my car and climbing in. Leah followed suit. After rolling down the window, I pulled out a cigarette and place it in my lip and lit it with my zippo. It was a beautiful silver with roses engraved on both sides. It was another gift from Sam, he didn't agree with my habit, but he understood it. I breathed in the smoke and relished in the nicotine flowing through me.
Leah shook her head. "You know we haven't hung out in so long. I forgot that you can't stand not smoking while you're in the car. I've surprisingly missed the menthol cigarette smell."
"It's a unique scent. Most people can't stand it. I'm glad you don't mind it because if not, it'll be a long drive." I replied teasingly. After that statement, I pulled out of the parking lot and started driving to Port Angeles. Leah searched through my glove compartment to find the perfect CD to play. She pulled out my recent addition to the collection. It was a new band called Fall Out Boy. I had been listening to it on repeat, but the day before, I had been listening to Coldplay. There wasn't much talking as we drove; we were too focused on the music. It didn't take long for us to reach Port Angeles. "So, where do you want to go first?"
"Why don't we go to Moxieand the Ally Cat? Oh, can we also head to Victoria Secret? I need some new bras?"Leah said.
"Sounds like a plan. I need some new panties and bras too. Also, I want to get some new sleepwear." I wanted to upgrade my wardrobe to try and be sexier. But I knew that Sam would find me sexy in anything I wore. He always was complimenting me, and from that, I felt more empowered. But I couldn't tell Leah why. If she asked, I'd just say it's a change of taste. I parallel parked on the street next to Moxies. Getting out, Leah gave me a smile.
"Let's get this started; we need to hit the stores before they close. I blame you that we have to rush." Leah teased. She knew I loved my job and that it took up a lot of my time. She believed that it was the only thing that was taking time away from us. But it was truly work and Sam that had limited my time. I couldn't tell her that, though.
"Hey, it's not my fault my shift ends at 6. Blame the schedules." I laughed.
We headed inside the store and were greeted by two employees. Leah and I shook our heads at needing any help. We looked through the racks, with our time crunch, we decided that trying on clothes would take too much time. So if any clothes didn't fit, we would just return them. I immediately found a cute white jean skirt with frayed edges. It looked as if it would fall to my mid-thigh. I usually didn't wear white clothing, worrying that I would just get it dirty. Another score I found was an off the black shoulder top, it would go perfectly with the skirt. Leah had found some black short shorts with frayed edged and a white light sweat sweater. She laughed and said, "Now, we somewhat match." We checked out and then headed to the next store.
At Alley Cat, we found more clothes that fit our style. We both found tight ripped jeans. We each bought several pairs and along with ripped short shorts. We bought the same light grey t-shirts that looked faded and had bleach stains. I also found a nice, entirely black bikini. It made me wish that me and Sam could go to the beach together, but it was too risky. I checked the time, and we had about an hour and a half to get to Victoria Secret. We drive over to the mall and quickly walk to the store.
We arrive at the bright pink store. The sickly sweet perfume was wafting out. It gave me a headache, but I could stand it for the time we were there. Leah and I immediately split up. I headed towards the sleepwear first. I found some silk cami sets. One being pink with a black outline. It had a deep cut to emphases the breast, and I knew it would be perfect. Another set was a cream white, only the cups covered with solid color; the rest of the set that covered the stomach was see-through lace. I picked up one more set and then headed over to the bras. I was blessed with a 32 C cup, which was pretty average, and I was able to find my bra's in most stores. But Sam never complained. I immediately found a set that caught my eye. It was a teal with lace covering the cups. It also came with matching see-through bikini panties that covered absolute nothing. I picked up another set that was a light purple that was also see-through and the cheeky panties that were basically invisible in the back. "What's with all the see-through lace?" I heard a familiar voice behind me. I almost dropped the basket I was carrying in shock.
"Don't do that, Leah, you almost gave me a heart attack," I said, covering my heart, but my eyes showed that I was playing.
Leah just laughed. "You've always been jumpy, but you didn't answer my question."
"I found that lace is a lot more comfortable and besides their sort of an empowerment tool. Maybe I'll be strong enough to ask someone out in these. God knows the nurses at work keep trying to set me up with their sons." I responded with a chuckled.
Leah just shook her head. "It didn't seem like their that comfortable, but that's just my option. Why don't you finally give Luke Newton a shot."
My heart started racing. "No." I immediately responded, hoping that my tone wouldn't reveal my fear. "I mean no, he's not my type."
"So, what is your type?"
"Sam," I thought but didn't say out loud. "I don't know yet. But definitely not him."
"Well, when you date a bit, you'll figure it out," Leah answered with a smile.
I picked up a few other sets while Leah and I talked about trivial things like her work and mine. I told her some vague details of the difficult and obscured cases. We had to rush to check out. My total was over a hundred dollars, but it was worth it to get some things that both Sam and I would enjoy. I was tempted to buy some sexier sleepwear, but that would raise Leah's suspicions of me having a boyfriend. We had to run back to the car because, by the time we got through shopping, it was a complete downpour. We were completely soaked by the time we got to the car. I kicked on the heat, and we started on our way back to the hospital. We arrived shortly after 11; the rain had gone back to a light drizzle. There was still enough time to head to Sam's. I would just stop by the house to tell dad I was staying at Sam's and give Leah enough time to get home.
"I've missed this. Us being together. Promise me that we'll see each other soon." Leah said while gabbing my hand, giving it a light squeeze.
"I promise. I love you, Leah." Giving her a tight squeeze back. Not looking into her eyes. I knew at that moment if I look into her eyes, I would tell her everything. I wanted so bad to tell her everything. My thoughts immediately spiraled.
"I love you too, Lily."
Sam POV
(March 6th, 2005)
"Is everything okay, Ana?" Ana had been acting weird all night. She had arrived shortly after 1, and we had been snuggling on the couch watching an old movie. She had been acting strange all night, distant. She wasn't focusing on anything. She was lost in her own head.
"Everything's fine." She said in a whisper, the tone in her voice wobbling. Still looking forward not meeting my eyes.
I sighed. "Now that clues me into that everything is not fine. What's wrong? You've been trapped in your head ever since you've been here. Ana, please look at me."
She shook her head and looked down. I tucked a finger under her chin and tilted her head towards mine. I could notice her eyes were shinny like she was holding back tears. "Baby. What's wrong? You can tell me anything. I'm here for you good times and bad. Let me in, tell me what's bothering you."
It's like I said the magic words, and having her look me in my eyes caused her emotions to bubble up. Tears slowly started falling down her cheeks. The tear speed began to rapidly increase. I tucked her into my chest, and then she began to whimper. I slowly started to rock her back and forward while stroking her gingery blonde hair, hoping to soothe her. It wasn't until 15 minutes later when she finally calmed down enough to talk. "I spent time with Leah today."
I immediately knew that's what upset her. "Did you tell her about us? Is that's what got you so upset?"
She violent shook her head. "No. But I wanted to. I wanted to tell her everything. I wanted to confess I've been seeing you, that I love you. But I couldn't. I just couldn't. I'm a horrible friend." She began sobbing again. Her voice hitching, and it sounded like her throat was constricting.
"You need to breathe, Ana. At this rate, you're going to pass out if you don't breathe. Just breathe with me." It took another 10 minutes to get her breathing back to normal. I softly spoke to her, "You are not a horrible friend. Yes, we've been hiding from her, but it's because we're waiting for the right moment, and right now, it's not the right time we both agree on that. However, you feel like the time is right, I'll go with you on it. I love you, and nothing will change that fact."
She whimpered into my chest and pulled back. "I'm not ready. Something in me, this isn't the time to tell her. It's too soon. I just can't get over the guilt. I don't think I'll ever get over the guilt. Even after we tell her. I just wish we didn't have to be such a secret. We can't go out of this house, and because of the treaty, we can't even escape to Port Angeles."
I cupped her face and stared seriously into her eyes. "I can't pretend to know the pain you're going through. But I will support you with everything I have. Yes, it would be nice to walk with you on the beach and have everyone that you're mine, but being in this house with you is all I need. You being in my arms is all I need."
Tears began to well up again in her eyes, her arms wrapped around me, and she clung as if her life depended on it. I gave her a kiss on her head and whispered in her ear, "You are everything to me. I didn't need an imprint to tell me that you were made for me."
"You're everything to me." I felt her lips on mine forcefully, and I responded to them. Picking her up and sitting her across my lap. I pull her close to me as if with my body being around her as if her worries and fear would disappear, but I knew that wouldn't be a way to help her find peace. Only telling Leah would do that. But till then, I would be the shoulder that she needs. Her hands ran up and grasped my hair. She tugged lightly at it, and I couldn't help the shudder that ran through me. I drew back.
"Ana, not tonight. You're upset. I won't take advantage of you like that." I said.
She shook her head and buried her face into my neck. "I need to forget. I need you to help me. Please, Sam, help me."
"Ana. I would give you the world if you asked me for it. But I don't you to make this decision when you can't think straight." I replied, I felt kisses up my neck, and I felt a need rise up in me. "Are you sure? Are you really really sure? I don't want you to feel like you need to do this."
I felt her head nod in answer. "I want this, Sam. Please."
I could hear the convection in her voice. Her mind was made up; she wasn't backing down. Her lips descended on mine again. Her need present. I returned it in kind. Trying to take her sorrow and pain away. I pick her up. Her weight being like that of a feather, she was so small compared to me, but we fit together perfectly. I slowly walk up the stairs with her face still buried in my neck. She was giving tiny nips, making it slightly hard to keep my focus. I set her down on the ground, and she wrapped her arms around me. She didn't make it all the way around my body being too large for her tiny arms, but it was like she was trying melding the two of us together. I lowered my lips to embrace hers again. It was a slow kiss, but the need was effervescent. I pulled off her scrub top slowly, taking in every inch of her flawless ivory skin. It was the beautiful sight, her standing there waiting to be devoured. Her eyes, while still a bit red from the tears, looked like they were on fire. I could stare into those sky blue eyes forever.
Lily POV
I was hypnotized by Sam's dark brown eyes. I got utterly lost in them. It was like the world fell away. I shook my brain into focus and quickly took off my scrub pants. I stood there only in my bra and panties, the cold night air chilling me. But the goosebumps weren't from the cold.
"God, how are you mine? What did I do to deserve you?" Sam said while taking a step towards me. He quickly took up the task of removing my bra, getting on his knees, and paying full attention to my breast. Sucking and tugging on my nipples. He quickly pulled back and blew a blast of cold air on my right nipple, making it stand at attention. A shudder ran through me; I threw my head before letting out a moan, grabbing his hair and pulling his head back towards my breast. He got the clue that I needed more attention and gladly gave it.
A hand slowly descended down my body, only stopping above my panties. I gazed down, wondering why the hand had stopped. Sam was looking back at me with questioning eyes, wanting to know if he had the go-ahead. I nodded my head frantically. Sam gave me a small smile, and his large hand cupped my sex. I could feel his intense body heat radiating through his palm. The heel of his hand began to press against the most sensitive part of me, giving me delicious pressure. He began to rub me through my white panties, causing me to become wetter, leaving clear evidence of my need. Sam's lips kissed my pelvic bone, and slowly he pulled my panties aside. His fingers began to rub up and down my slit, circling my clit every time he approached it. "How fond are you of these?" He growled out.
"I don't know, please just don't stop." I suddenly heard a rip, and it took a second for my mind to understand that he had literally ripped off my underwear. I should be angry, but I revealed in this show of his strength. Sam quickly stood up and kissed me passionately, cupping my face with both his hands. His tongue licking my full bottom lip, asking for permission. I gladly gave in. His tongue circled mine, exploring every crevasse of my mouth. It was a few minutes, but I soon felt the need for air, and I pulled back panting. I felt my body become air born for a moment only to crash onto a soft surface. Heat suddenly encompassed me; another passionate kiss slammed against my lips. My hands instantly ran through Sam's short hair, giving short pulls to which Sam took as encouragement. I felt the hand return to my heat, and it began to tease my entrance. I whimpered and bucked my hips, my body wanting more. The fingers slowly entered, giving me a second to adjust. I felt full, and the heat became overwhelming. My hips frantically bucked while the fingers began to move, and his thumb rubbed fastly over my clit. "Oh, god, Sam." I moaned out.
"That's it, baby girl, let go. Let it all go." Those words stirred me, and it made me lose my inhibitions, I no longer cared about what I looked like. I gave into the complete pleasure. His fingers rapidly increased in rate, pumping into me at lightning speed. The knot that had formed in me began to grow tighter. It became so tight that I was panting, trying to relieve the pressure. "Don't hold back. I want to hear you, baby, I need to hear you." A voice said through a haze. There was a snap in the rope, and I let out a small scream, my body shaking and vibrating. The fingers stopped momentarily, pulling out of me and allowing me to have a moment of relief. My vision went momentarily black, I couldn't see a thing, but I could feel a large hand run through my hair.
When my vision returned, I saw Sam staring at my face with a content smile. "How do you feel now, baby?" He said with a smile.
"Like my body is jello," I responded quietly, my voice not working correctly.
He nuzzled his nose into my neck, his voice slightly muffled. "You don't know how good you smell right now. It is like a drug making me want to continue to give you pleasure."
"I want more, Sam. I'm ready for more."
He pulled his head back. "Ana, we don't have to. I can wait forever for you."
I shook my head rapidly. "Sam, I need this. please." My voice came out pleadingly.
He gazed into my eyes, looking for any doubt, any sign that I was not ready for this step. There was none. I was truly ready. "Alright, baby girl. We take this at your pace. It will probably be best if you're on top for this time."
"Okay," I responded, leaning down, laying a kiss on his lips. He reached towards his bedside table, probably going to get a condom. I quickly spoke up. "We don't need a condom."
"Ana, I don't think we're ready for a kid."
"We don't need one, I'm on birth control. Have been for a while." I replied shyly.
"Since when?" He asked while raising an eyebrow.
"A week after we first had sex. I wanted to be prepared."
He crashed his lips against mine. Only pulling back when it was evident that I needed air. "You didn't have to do that, but thank you anyway." He raised his hips, sliding down his shorts and boxers simultaneously, throwing them across the room. Then sitting up and taking off his shirt, adding it to the pile of our clothes. "Now, are you ready?"
"Yes." I breathed out. Sam laid on his back and spread his toned muscular legs. I felt embolden and slowly crawled up his body, trailing a finger up his legs as I went. I could feel the shudder that ran through his body. I straddled his hips when I reached my destination. His member was standing at full attention, and I took a deep breath, reading myself. I lowered myself gently, Hissing at the tightness and slight pinching. Sam's hand rubbed up and down my back, soothing the pain and taking my attention away. I took each inch at a time; he was so large and full that it seemed to take forever for our hips to finally meet. I was still for a moment letting myself adjust and relax around him.
When I finally felt ready, I began to slowly rock back and forth. Sighing in the pleasure that was starting to radiate through me. I looked down and saw that Sam's eyes were close and that his face screamed that he was on a different plane. "Am I doing this, right?" I quietly spoke up, wanting to make sure I was giving him pleasure.
"Oh, baby girl, you are doing it perfectly, but I need you to go faster. I'm not going to break." He groaned out. His hand reaching up to grab my hips, pushing them back and forth at a faster pace. I swiftly adjusted my speed, now knowing what to do, while laying my hands on his broad chest to steady myself. I felt emboldened by the sounds I was bringing forth from his lips: hissing and groaning. The hands-on my hips tightened and began to lift me up and down. "How are you so fucking tight. God, you're squeezing the shit out of my cock. I could die happily being buried in you."
His words brought out a wave of confidence. Sam could tell that his dirty talk was bringing out a different side of me. "You like that. You like it when I talk dirty to you." His pace of pumping into me went faster, his cock hitting my cervix, giving me a slight rush of pain but also a thrill of pleasure. "You're supposed to be a good girl, but you aren't. You're a temptress and a girl who likes it when I tell you exactly what you do to me."
I couldn't help the words that rushed out my mouth. "God, I do. I want to know what I do to you."
"I want to know what I do to you, baby girl. Tell me everything." He began to slam into me with extreme force, and I couldn't suppress the scream that erupted from my lips. "That's right, baby. I want to hear you. I don't want you to fucking hide what I'm doing to you. I wanna know what you want."
A blush rose on my face, and I said the next words in the heat of the moment. "I need you to keep going. I want you to absolutely destroy me."
"Prepared for your wish to be granted." In an inhuman speed, he began to ram into me. My hips snapping back in forth, looking for pleasure. A hand snaked down and began to rub my clit. The knot returned. I started to pant, and small whines left my lips. My back was arched fully, my head faced the other wall. There was a heat that rushed over me, I felt my body working up a sweat, but I didn't care. All I cared about was the need for gratification. Sam began to growl. "I'm almost there, baby. I want you to cum with me. Can you do that for me? Can you let go fully?"
I rapidly nodded my head. Wanting nothing more than to please him. The knot in my stomach tighten, and then all of a sudden was cut apart. My mouth screamed out his name, and my nails dug into his chest, I was suddenly floating on air. I could feel a final thrust and the Sam shaking below me. He groaned out my name, and I could see his jaw clench. It was a long time before either of us came back to earth, but the second that Sam came back, he was chest to chest with me, his arms wrapping around me, and kissing me like his life depended on it. I sighed into the kiss and energetically returned it. I suddenly felt my hips cramp up, and I knew I needed to lie down.
"Sam, honey. I need to get off."
"Oh, I'm sorry." He opened his arms, and I got off him. I mewled at the loss of contact, but I knew that I couldn't be in that position for a while. I got under the covers, finally feeling the cold air encompassing me. Sam followed my example and joined me. I laid my head on his chest. My mind was clear again, and the thoughts that I was escaping from came back. But a new fear rose up in me.
"Sam. Can you promise me something?" I asked in a quiet voice. My voice trembling.
He kissed the top of my head. "And what is that?"
"Please don't leave me," I whispered.
"Ana. You are my world. I could never leave you even if I tried, and I will never try." He went down and clasped my hand.
"Thank you."
Well, that's it. Feel free to comment. Hope you all liked it.