Chapter three - Questions

'Martin, are you sure?'

'Yes actually.'

'But why? I mean is it because you want to solve Penhale's problem?'

'No Louisa, besides, I cannot discuss patient information with you, you know that...'

'So, it's for personal reasons...'

He took her hand to find comfort in the tuch of her lovely skin.

'Well..., doctor Johnson advised me not to run away from the problem, but to face it. What would be a better opportunity to face it than by attending this conference? '

Louisa laid her hand firmly on his arm. 'Martin, look at me... You know you will put yourself in a very vulnerable position, don't you?'

Martin swallowed hard. This was probably what doctor Johnson tried to explain to him: opening up to Louisa and discussing things together would make her more considerate towards him as well.

'Hmmm, yes, I suppose you're right, but, you know, this conference will be attended by maybe two hundred persons or more and very few of them know me or my past as vascular surgeon. My ex-colleagues from the Imperial are not very likely to come to this kind of conferences that do not deal with the most modern operating skills and techniques. I reckon that I will be able to be there without really being noticed...'

'And excel in putting up your usual stoneface to stay in control during the conference?

Gosh, Louisa did know him very well!, he thought.

'Hmm.. The content of the conference actually is really interesting and it can help me treat cases of agoraphobia, or mysophobia, claustrophobia and so on if cases would occur in my surgery. Most probably I will learn a lot about CBT, cognitive behavioural therapy, which will make it easier for me to accompany patients with several types of disorders of phobia. I mean, I could have diagnosed Mikes problems much earlier, if I would have known more on that subject..'.

For a second, even Martin himself forgot that he shouldn't discuss patient's matters with his beautiful wife, but, he thougth, it was probably a more useful argument to convince Louisa to cross the Channel wih him.

Maybe he could use some of that CBT himself, Louisa thought, but she was so wise not to mention it. That would certainly spoil this wonderful evening.

Louisa smiled instead and said. 'So, what do you have in mind for me and James?'

Martin sighed with relief - not an immediate no, that was promissing.

More enthousiastically and a bit reassured, Martin explained: 'Of course there is the partner program, we will have to look-up what that offers', but ... I.. Ehm.. I would like you to be around ... Not far away ... On the day they treat the blood phobia..'

... He had a huge lump in his throat to swallow away...

'Louisa, when I'm with you, you make me feel so much more confident about everything.. And, as an answer to your question, yes I know it will be difficult to cope with the subject. And.. I think.. , no, I know I will need your - and James' - conforting presence that day. So please, will you come with me to Amsterdam?

His own eyes glistening with emotional tears, he looked into hers, longing for a positive answer.

To be continued.