Apparently satisfied with my determined expression, Kurama smiled and roared in my face one last time, expelling me from his place of residence and into the real world, where I was immediately greeted by a sensation that had become very familiar to me over the course of my existence.
Pain.
I was overwhelmed with an overflow of new information, from my eyes feeling like they were burning due to the brightness of the world, my brain hurting as if someone was constantly hammering a gong into my ear drums, while my nose was assaulted by the overpowering fragrance of ash mixed with blood, a perfect recipe to trigger my gag reflex. And as if my discomfort wasn't evident already, a searing cold was piercing every pore of my body, freezing me to my very bones and causing me, despite my best efforts to break into pained cries at the harshness of my newfound situation.
I was tiny, I realized belatedly upon feeling myself being picked up by two shaky hands holding me into someone's arms before the pain started subsiding little by little and my vision faded to the familiar darkness once more.
Only after waking up a second time did I register that my being overwhelmed by my senses was not a temporary thing, but rather a new natural state of being for me, though it was only after a warm liquid I had recognized as either milk or baby formula, had been forcefully pushed down my throat that I had finally understood my current state of distress was due to having been reborn as an infant.
I had no idea whether I was truly being given a second opportunity at life as compensation for my terrible first experience or if this was all a figment of my imagination, courtesy of a dying brain on the verge of fading to nothingness due to a lack of oxygen slowly extinguishing my existence, but it would not be a development I would be complaining about, either way.
As far as I was concerned, the afterlife, rebirth, reincarnation or any other dozen of trillion of possible scenarios would be a welcome surprise I would jump into no question asked in my current condition, so long as it did not feature my being in pain or immobilized forever.
If this was really happening, I was elated to have a second shot at reaching happiness and experiencing a content state of being for once in my cursed life. If it wasn't? Well then, I would try having as much fun and be as happy as possible before everything shut down. Having unfounded nihilistic thoughts would not help me in any way in my current situation, or at least for the time being...
My decision to go with the flow and accept my newfound situation, while being a good one for my peace of mind, did not change much the unfortunate position I had found myself in at that point in time, as a newborn child, seeing as my eyes and ears had clearly not yet developed to a point allowing me to discern anything happening around me, which put an immediate stop to any scheme I might have had dead in its tracks and forcing me to pick the second-best possible plan of action in the current circumstances; closing my eyes and pretending I did not exist.
If I could not withstand the excess stimuli, I would simply wait until things settled down around me and I could realistically comprehend and safely interact with the outside world without feeling any pain or having my senses be overwhelmed again.
Luckily, while still not the greatest scenario to find myself in, the pill of being isolated and more or less asleep to the outside world once again, was made much easier to swallow for me thanks to the simple fact that I had kept a modicum of mobility, allowing me if I concentrated hard enough on it, for the first time in either of my lives, to move my fingers ever so slightly. It was a marvelous situation and a first for me, and I was eternally grateful for the chance to experience such a simple pleasure of life.
For me to be able to move on my own accord was a dream come true, one I had fantasized about for years now and I couldn't be happier for the opportunity to realize it, though my heart still ached at the knowledge that running a finger over another was the pinnacle of human condition and the highlight of my humanity so far.
It was a very sad state of affairs, if I were to be honest...
Closing my eyes had the benefit of allowing me to return to my constellation and I was pleasantly surprised to find out that Kurama had decided to copy my idea and he too had taken the form of a sphere in my little personal dimension. The size difference of course was humongous, as where my core and attached nodes had plateaued at around the size of a blue football, Kurama was very much the size of a crimson sun, illuminating the whole dimension with an eerie glow and blocking out even the surrounding darkness from view behind his massive form, something I was strangely grateful for.
Interestingly, he hadn't stopped in simply copying my core design, but had even taken the time to create a few tendrils of his own, though unlike mine which were somewhat proportional and took about half the diameter of my nodes, his were heavily downscaled, barely reaching the size of two superposed radii of my cores.
It was intriguing to see him be true to his word and helping me out as unless I was greatly mistaken, he was feeding some of his energy into my own, making my structure slowly but steadily gain even more solidity and brightness.
Another positive of the discovery was the fact it allowed me to confirm once and for all that I hadn't been mistaken in my theories, and the structure I had spent so long working on had indeed been my chakra system.
Ignoring my surroundings for the time being, I focused all my efforts on helping Kurama's energy flow faster into the first of my celestial bodies, determined as I was to see it reach at least ten times its current size, Kurama's sun having made me reconsider how insignificant I truly was in the grand scheme of things, and while I knew it would take me eons to reach that level, any effort made was good progress and in my opinion completely worth undertaking.
It was in that state of semi blindness and unconsciousness that the next few weeks or months flew by for me, empty of new developments or novel experiences as I slept the days away, working on my chakra orbs all day long with the only pauses, few and far between as they were, coming from when I was being fed, an event during which I never protested or refused my meal, having tried once and learned the hard way it would not be a winning strategy for me; I would simply be forcefully and painfully fed the same liquid at a later date anytime I rejected the gentler approach.
A healthy fear of pain was a great way to ensure a baby would comply without question, I had discovered, which in a bizarre roundabout way, had proved itself a positive thing in the long term, as those regularly scheduled events kept me conscious enough of my situation to somewhat reliably estimate the amount of time I was spending meditating in boredom and in the darkness of my thoughts.
The weeks had blended together, however, until one beautiful morning when I had been pleasantly surprised to discover my eyesight had improved to the point where I could discern more than obscure shapes and colors without issue, making that day, from that point onwards, the best one of my existence as I enjoyed for the first time in an eternity, the simple freedom of darting my eyes all over the room while wiggling my fingers one against the others, like it had become a habit for me to do.
Methodically, I had thoroughly examined my surroundings for the first time and quickly established that while extremely exciting as an experience, the fact that I finally had something to do with my time had also proved itself both fulfilling and informative as an activity, explicitly confirming for me the veracity of Kurama's claim that I had been reborn into the body of Naruto Uzumaki, if the giant Konoha flag, which served as curtains to the room was any indication of my location.
Sadly, my observations of the room had ended there, as other than some very faded beige curtains, my living space was entirely bare and sterile, being completely devoid of any furniture or personality besides the inexpressive and blinding white light of the ceiling lamp, the dark brown mahogany tiles and an old and decrepit green wallpaper. The walls of what I assumed to be my crib were unfortunately much too opaque and high to allow any visibility into the rest of the room from my position, but the sounds of crying I could hear made me well aware that I was probably not the only infant present, which checked out with my knowledge that the real Naruto Uzumaki had grown up in an orphanage for the first few years of his life.
Predictably, the sight of the same empty walls had quickly lost all of its appeal to me and boredom once again started setting in when I was startled by the entrance into my room of an old woman walking directly towards my bed and without preamble or hesitation picking me up and changing my diapers in a matter of seconds. She was already putting me back into the bed before I knew what was happening, making me realize, to my growing horror that not only had I been wearing diapers without my knowledge, but that I had also been physically behaving so far like any regular baby would, soiling myself daily and emptying my bladder and the contents of my stomach right there on my bed without a thought or control over my urges.
Needless to say, the revelation that I was back to the absolute basics was a pretty hard one to swallow for me and I was confident the mortification I felt at that point in time would follow me into the grave, the freeze of my brain having even prevented me from taking stock of my caretaker beyond a furtive glance, as I closed my eyes, stubbornly pretending to be asleep to avoid the risk of ever meeting her gaze, a strategy I was determined to adopt from now on for any such encounter in the future.
Thankfully, the woman was clearly very experienced in the accomplishment of her duties and she had already moved onto her next task, leaving me resting into the bed, freshly cleaned and changed by the time I had reopened my eyes.
It was somewhat disappointing to understand I was once again back to my solitude in the room, if one ignored the minor annoyance that were the crying baby sounds around me.
Alone with my thoughts, I mentally replayed the interaction I had just experienced and couldn't help but find it odd. The woman had done her job with a perfect level of professionalism and from what I had seen, her expression hadn't changed at all upon first seeing me, but I couldn't help questioning the fact she had not taken the time to even smile at me, a child she was in charge of. I was almost positive I had read somewhere how important it was for young children to see smiles regularly in order for them to develop healthy and happy.
And yet, she had been completely expressionless with me.
I still had far too little of a sample size to judge whether the treatment was reserved to me in particular due to my furry little tenant, or if the woman was simply swamped with duties and overworked, which to be fair to her, and considering it had, at this point in time, barely been a few months since the Nine Tail's attack, probably meant the orphanage was as overpopulated and understaffed as it would ever get.
I really hoped that wasn't the case, however, as I knew it would get old real fast for me if such apathy was the reaction I had to expect in the foreseeable future from the adults around me.
I still was hopeful that I could at least win over some hearts among my current generation, at the very least.
Being forewarned and already equipped with years of solitude under my name had its advantages, as it meant I would be fully prepared to deal with the social situation once I was thrust into it and not do something stupid in the hopes of attracting the village's attention or worse, its ire towards me in the hope of escaping my loneliness.
Rather than spend my time speculating on the who and why of my current position, I opted to go with the flow instead and see how things would change going forward now that I was finally awake and aware of my surroundings.
My time, I knew, was better spent trying to move a little, with the ultimate objective of flipping myself onto my stomach. The efforts unfortunately proved a fruitless endeavor for the longest of times, but in the end I had made some progress over the following weeks in my observations, even as I lay on my back, perpetually stuck in bed, pedaling aimlessly for days as meals and diapers flew by in an endless cycle of boredom.
I was able to make many interesting discoveries during that time frame, chief of all being that the person taking care of me changed regularly, alternating between the first elderly woman I had noticed and a younger one with short black hair wearing an eye patch, hiding what must be an empty eye socket if the ugly scar going from her forehead to her jaw was any indication.
It was a good reminder that this world would not be as peaceful as I would have hoped my second life would have been, with death and injury awaiting at every corner, whether I was ready or not.
Like I had feared, it seemed the lack of warmth in their interactions with their charge was not a flaw the orphanage staff were saddled with as their complete ignorance of my existence was aimed only towards my own person, as despite not being able to see anything going on outside my field of view or understand the language, I had on numerous occasions overheard the two women's voices cooing at my roommates, whom I had discovered there were three of.
Fortunately, their dislike and mistrust of myself was limited to their lack of interaction with me, rather than anything more drastic, and I was changed, cleaned and fed exactly as often as the other children, which was completely fine by me for now and much better than I had feared after my first time awakening.
On a more positive note however, I had discovered that my teeth had started to grow by probing my mouth with my tongue, though for some reason, and unlike what I had read and come to expect, the experience was a completely painless one for me, something I was very grateful to the Nine Tails' for, as I assumed it was his influence on my healing factor that made the feat a feasible one.
Naturally, the development had seen my meals slowly transitioned from milk to more varied and slightly more consistent things such as apple sauce, mashed potatoes and puréed meat, though I had no idea how my caretakers had known to do so as they never examined me or spent any meaningful amount of time in my presence, making me ponder whether they did so when I was asleep, a somewhat worrying and creepy prospect, though there was not much I could do about it.
I had decided to look at the situation from a positive point of view, celebrating the fact as a good sign that I was starting to grow up, though I still found it strange how I had never left this empty room, the silent workers even bringing a basin of water with them from time to time to clean me up with a washing cloth once every few days instead of moving me to a bathroom, though assuming they had many rooms and children to care for, I would admit it was probably more efficient this way, no matter how boring it was for me.
As the days went, each identical to the next, I found myself unable to ignore the fact that I was growing progressively more restless and angsty to leave the cramped space I was sequestered to, the bed feeling more and more like a cell due to my unbearably dull routine.
Such boredom had pushed me to double my efforts and put every waking moment into attempting to increase my mobility, which I had finally been able to do, becoming, after repeated struggles and an herculean effort from my part, capable of flipping myself over onto my stomach.
Surprisingly, the very next day after my greatest feat yet, of both lives, and wasn't that a disheartening thought, had brought a welcome change with it, as due to my newfound mobility, my caretakers had apparently judged me as having grown old enough to be moved into more accommodating arrangements.
As a result, I had experienced, for the first time in this life, the feeling of being picked up and carried into another room where I was deposited into a new bed with wooden bars rather than the high walls of my previous one, making me feel like some sort of overgrown chicken in the enclosed space rather than a child.
Still, the space between bars of my new cell were greatly appreciated as it now allowed me to peek at the rest of the room from ground level and confirmed that each room had four children in it.
In the end, the move was definitely an improvement over my previous arrangements as the increase in available space now allowed me to go even further in my attempts of moving myself, quickly graduating from the stomach flipping phase into the arduous task of learning how to crawl.
Similarly, being allowed to see more human beings was probably good for my mental health, and I was able to observe the other three occupants of the room, quickly discovering they were just like me, slightly older than infants, but not quite old enough to sit or even stand on their own yet.
Gripped by a sudden burst of competitiveness, I had silently vowed in my little heart to sit, stand and walk before any of the dumb crying machines I was saddled with as roommates.
Predictably, it was an easy feat to accomplish, though I had been surprised by how easy it was, having taken barely twelve days between my first time rolling over, after discovering that being on my stomach allowed for a much wider range of motion and my being able to start doing mini push ups and holding a weak version of the plank had greatly accelerated the muscle build up in my tiny limbs.
From there, it had only been a question of time before I was able to move more steadily, and not wasting time, I had immediately gone on to work on trying to sit, a task made easier by my being able to crawl towards the bars of my bed and hold onto them as I pulled myself up.
Slightly more than a full week later, and I had managed to accomplish this feat too, making it even quicker than I had expected, let alone before the other children had mastered crawling.
I was clearly underestimating myself and the capabilities for improvement of this body at every step and yet, part of me felt like the completion of my self-set task could not have happened fast enough.
Regardless of my previous belief that I was ready to face the loneliness of my situation as the village pariah, it had truly hurt me to actually see the two women smile and laugh as they fed the other children, even playing with them a little, while the most I had ever gotten was a raised eyebrow upon finding me trying to gain more mobility, no matter how well behaved I was or how brightly I smiled at them whenever it was my turn to be fed. It had been easier to wave the whole thing away when I could only theorize it was happening and I almost missed my bed walls by the time I was ready to be moved once again.
Luckily, as experience had already proved, it had only been a question of time as I was not a permanent prisoner of my current lodgings, and sure enough, I knew that after only a few more days of doing everything in my power to get more strength into my knees with more of my weakling push ups and baby kicks in the air, I would be deemed to have shown enough proficiency with standing and even taking a few steps to graduate onto the next stage of my development.
By that point, I had been highly motivated to overcome this painful part of my life as quickly as possible and move onto bigger and better things like actually learning the language of this world and so, it was only ten days later that I had managed to fully stand on my own, even progressing enough to take some hesitant steps while holding the bars of my bed, that I was finally allowed outside my room and into the common room with the other children.
In retrospect, my rush might have been a mistake from my part...