Hello everyone, thank you so much for all the reviews the last chapter. One especially had me khdglkdj cause like DID YOU READ MY NOTES?
I want to dedicate this chapter to my dear friend and birthday girl, Pauline. I hope you've had the best of days.
To everyone else, I hope you enjoy this next part (I've been listening to talk me down all day while I wrote this and idk I feel like that's the mood of this chapter, a little bit) and hope you'll stick along for what's to come. As always, I'd love to know what you think so let me know in the reviews.
Enjoy. X - M
MISTLETOE MYSTERY
CHAPTER XIII
Tuesday, December 18
"Why do I have to go again?" Mike asks Rachel as she ushers him through the living room.
"Because," the brunette reasons, stealing a glance at her roommate, silently begging for help, but there is none. She faces Mike again then, pressing a kiss against his lips as she reaches for his coat. "It wouldn't be a surprise if you knew, wouldn't it."
"What?"
Harvey crosses his arms and eyes the small exchange, the words' what surprise' on the tip of his tongue, but Donna simply shakes her head and then motions for him to follow Mike.
"You'll find out soon enough," Rachel reassures her boyfriend, but the look on his face grows even more curious.
Harvey's does, too, as he slips on his coat and eyes the redhead once over, but she remains silent just like before. "Okay, man," Harvey says then, hand falling on Mike's shoulder. "It's clear we're not wanted here anymore."
"Fine," Mike grumbles, opening the door with his left hand. He pulls Rachel closer with his right, bringing her to him. "I'll figure it out," he says, pressing a kiss against her lips.
"You won't," Rachel smirks, stealing one last peck before she steps away. "Now, go," she adds, motioning for the boys to leave with a flick of her wrist.
"Yes, ma'am," Harvey answers, nodding at Rachel first, then Donna and his eyes lock with her when he does so. He remains rooted on his spot for a second longer than usual, swallowing thickly. He nods once more and then turns around too.
Rachel looks back and forth between the new couple, smiles to herself and then shuts the door behind them. "So…" she muses.
"So what?" Donna asks, looking back over her shoulder as she makes her way to Rachel's bedroom.
Rachel signals the door and looks somewhat confused now, but Donna already plops down on her bed and simply shakes her head. "Never mind," she whispers, and she walks to her dresser; pushing the door aside, she reaches for a bag from the bottom.
"What exactly is it that you want to make?" Donna inquires; pulling her knee up, she draws her arms around it. "Something with a picture, I assume," she adds, thinking about the present Harvey had given her.
"A calendar."
"But he –"
Rachel laughs, cutting Donna's rebuttal short. "That's kind of the point," she admits. "I know he doesn't need it to remember, but that's also exactly why I can wear this." Rachel pulls out a short red Christmas dress.
Donna's lips part in surprise, and she stares at her friend for a moment as she takes it all in. A laugh follows suit, and she shifts over the bed. "He watched you rehearse that scene from Mean Girls, and he asked you to dress up, didn't he?"
"Yep."
"And you just happened to have the costume," Donna fires back.
"Pretty much."
Rachel's tone is firm enough to stop any further teasing comments for Donna, and she's heard enough wild stories over the years to know what they're like.
"Okay, I'll let you get ready, and then I'll help you with the pictures."
"Thank you."
.
Rachel ties the knot of her silk robe and slides her knee over Donna's bed, turning around to sit against the headboard. "We should go out tonight," she suggests, reaching for her glass of wine from the nightstand. "Have a girl's night; let's go dancing."
"That'd be nice."'
"Ooh," Rachel jumps up, almost spilling her wine as she does so, and she places it down before rushing to Donna's closet. Staring at the contents for a moment, she pushes a bunch of hangers aside to reach the three dresses still in plastic covers. All of them gifts from Alice, and now that she's finally seen Donna wear one of her sister's creations, she figures it's time for the next one.
"That's a ball gown," Donna argues, shaking her head when Rachel only has the zipper undone halfway. "I'm not wearing that."
Rachel sighs and hangs it back, moving on to the one all the way in the back. It's another dark green ensemble, and it looks stunning. "This one," Rachel pulls the halter dress out of its cover and lays it out over the duvet.
Donna eyes the dress, she remembers seeing this during a fashion show two years back, and she loved it then. She loves it now; the problem is just that the model had a little less to cover. "I don't think I have a bra that can go with that."
"So," Rachel shrugs.
"I'm not going out without a bra," Donna fires back, and she can't help but glance down at her frame. She shakes her head lightly as if talking herself out of doing so.
"Wait." Rachel steps towards the dresser on the wall, opening up what she knows to be Donna's underwear drawer. "Didn't you get that lace bodysuit on sale a few months back?"
"Uhm," Donna mutters, glancing at her friend as she rummages through the content. "Yeah." She peers back at the dress, thinks over the combination and realises that it might actually work. She remembers what else she hid in the drawer then, but before she can jump in, Rachel seems to have found it.
"Ooh," Rachel beams the second she finds the purple box at the bottom of the drawer. She doesn't pick it up but continues her search for the bodice. "It's good, isn't it? I have the older version."
Donna presses her lips into a thin line- that she knows. She, however, hasn't had a chance to use hers yet, so she can't answer truthfully and settles on a non-committal hum.
"Wow," Rachel chuckles, and she pulls out what she was looking for at last. "Harvey must be exceptional." She tosses the piece of lingerie over.
"What?"
"I mean, I love Mike, but -," Rachel says, sitting down next to donna again with a shrug.
Donna peers down at the bodice, lets the lace slip through her fingers as she rakes her brain for an answer, but her mind produces thoughts she shouldn't linger on instead. "He is," she answers at last, but not solely to keep up appearances.
"I'm happy for you," Rachel chirps; squeezing her friend's hand she taps the bodice. "Now, why don't you try this on, and I'll go over the pictures you took real quick okay." She crawls back over the bed to the headboard, grabs her glass of wine once more and then Donna's phone.
Rachel is scrolling back and forth between the pictures, airdropping them to her own phone when Donna returns from the bathroom, arms swinging by her side as she stops in the middle of the room.
"Well?"
Rachel sends the last picture to her phone, and then slowly lifts her gaze to take in her friend. "Wow."
Donna inhales deeply and finally faces the full length mirror. The bodice is deep black, covering everything from her waist down except for a lace edge running over her hips. She lets her hand run over her stomach and to her hips, finger tracing the pattern in the mesh fabric as she slowly lifts her gaze. The body suit splits near her middle into a halter made out of lace and it while it doesn't give much support it covers enough.
Rachel watches the way Donna admires herself and while she doesn't know Donna to be anything less than confidence on heels, there's something about the moment she witnesses right now that makes her snap a quick shot of it with Donna's phone.
Donna traces the lace up over her shoulder, lets her hand run over her collar bone and then lets out a deep breath. "Come on, let's get ready," she says reaching for the dress at last.
"Yeah," Rachel hums, staring at the phone, she scoots closer to the edge. "You should send this to Harvey to let him know what he's missing out on tonight."
Donna pulls the halter over her head and glances up at Rachel. "What?"
"I snapped a picture of you looking into the mirror just now, can I send it to Harvey?" She asks, but she holds the phone out in front of Donna to look first.
"What did you – "she leaps forward and takes her phone back, her thumb accidentally running over the screen and her eyes widen as she sees the picture being send right in front of her eyes. To Harvey.
"Well, nothing yet," Rachel argues, as she pulls Donna to sit down next to her. She eyes her friend as Donna stares at the phone, now noticing the redhead send the picture herself. By mistake she realises from the look on her face.
She stares at the phone in her hand, seeing the message under the photo change into delivered and her fingers tremble.
"I'm so sorry."
Rachel's voice eases her panic a little and she stares back between her friend and the screen again. A part of her wants to scream, but she really can't. Not without blowing their whole cover and she cannot be the one to do that. She keeps her eyes directed on the little note that still reads 'delivered'.
"You just looked so beautiful, I – "
"It's okay," Donna whispers then, lightly shaking her head and she taps the picture, enlarging it on her screen. She has to admit it is a beautiful picture and honestly doesn't show that much, from the back it's like she's wearing a bathing suit and the lighting is bad enough that the lace front isn't all that visible in the mirror. The message typed along with it, also Rachel's doing, a simple 'Miss you', but in the end Donna is the one who send it. She locks her screen and tosses her phone aside. "It's fine," she whispers again, reassuring both Rachel and herself. "It just – "
"You hadn't done that before with Harvey," Rachel fills in and Donna shakes her head. "I'm sure he doesn't mind." Donna genuinely chuckles at that, and Rachel sighs in relieve at last. Wrapping her arm around Donna, she pulls her closer. "I'm sorry," she says again, pressing a kiss against her friend's head. "I keep forgetting you two aren't Mike and me."
"You mean, you and Mike –"
"All the time," Rachel hums. "Not necessarily pictures, but yeah – I'd like to distract him during class. You know when's about to answer the questions"
"What?"
"Level the playing field a little. We can't all have photographic memories now, can we?" Rachel counters with a shrug. She pushes her hands down on the mattress and stands. "Are you still okay to go out?"
Donna bobs her head up and down, and watches Rachel make her way back to her bedroom.
"I'll call us a cab," Rachel calls out. "Half an hour, okay?"
"Okay." Donna presses her phone to check the time, she notices the notifications or more the lack there of first and feels her chest tighten once more. Unlocking it, she glances at the message that still only reads 'delivered'.
.
Swinging her arms through the air, hair loose and sticking to her skin at the same time as she jumps along to the beat. She laughs loudly at Rachel's moves and only when the song transitions to the next one does the catch her breath. "I need a drink."
"What?" Rachel yells out over the music, leaning in.
"Drink," Donna motions this time around, and she links her hand with Rachel's, dragging her towards the bar. They plop down on the seats where they also started their evening and she reorders their drinks. Digging through her purse for a bill, she pulls out her phone and taps the screen.
Rachel catches a glimpse of the movement from the corner of her eye, as she checks her own phone. "Still no response?" she asks because it's not the first time she's caught the redhead peeking at her phone this evening.
There's no answer from Donna, but she catches a hint of a smile forming on her friend's lips. "Ooh my god, there is," Rachel exclaims, taking the drinks from the bartenders hand, she slides one over to Donna.
Donna swallows and quickly shoves her phone back into her purse. She puts on a knowing grin and shakes her head, telling her without words she isn't revealing anything. The truth is, his answer came the moment they got out of the cab and the simple vibration of her phone in her hand had send shivers down her spine. It had taken a minute to glance at the screen and she'd done so just before the wardrobe.
Except it wasn't so much a verbal message as a visual one. Black and white, badly lid and showing just as little as hers and yet this was the fifth time she finds herself staring at the picture of him in the bathtub. Taken through the mirror, it doesn't show more than his knees, shoulders and his phone half in front of his face.
She has no clue why he answered the way he did, but the one thing it did do was reiterate the realisation she'd come to four days ago. She's in love with him, with her best friend Harvey, and for the first time in the last couple of years, there was no what if. No who is this mistletoe mystery guy.
Just Harvey.
Taking a small sip from her martini, she plays with the toothpick and moves the olives around her glass. "I'm giving up on finding him."
"What, who?" Rachel asks, not sure she's following the conversation.
"The mistletoe mystery guy," Donna answers, with a shake of her head. "I'm not – "she pauses and thinks back to a conversation she's had with Rachel before. About how she didn't think about that one night when she was with Harvey and how that should tell her everything she needs to know. "I don't want to find him anymore," she admits.
"Because of Harvey?"
There's a pause, a moment of silence but she nods at last.
"Good." Rachel's lips curl up and she takes a sip of her drink. "Cause you do know you guys are going to be together forever, right?"
The toothpick slips from her fingers at that, and she almost gasps at the words. In a way, they've always been true. He's her best friend, and she can't imagine her life without him, but that isn't what Rachel means, and it isn't what she considers to be enough anymore. But at the same time, it's a reminder of what isn't. They aren't even together at all.
"I mean," Rachel licks her lips and places her glass down. She covers Donna's hand with her own. "You're not going to date someone with the expectation to break up again, you know?"
She does; deep down, she does.
"People might realise they're not compatible, but you and Harvey," Rachel continues, letting go of her hand; she peers to the two guys walking towards them in the distance. "You've been best friends for three years now, skirting this line for all that time. Now that you two are together, chances are in a Christmas or two he's getting down on one knee."
The brunette looks at Donna again, finding a somewhat shocked expression on her face now and she chuckles, bobs her elbow against her friend. "I have to go to the bathroom, watch my purse."
"Sure," Donna answers, clutching onto the little bag in her lap. She lets out a breath she didn't know she was holding and reaches for her drink again. Downing it in one go, she almost spits it out when a hand slides over her back, settling on her hip.
"You still wearing that?"
She jumps up ever so slightly at the low familiar voice near her ear, but all shock is gone when she turns to face his cheeky grin. She playfully slaps his chest and shakes her head. "You'll never know."
"Bathroom," Donna mouths handing Rachel's purse over to Mike. She watches him nod and make his way to the back as Harvey slips onto the empty stool next to her. His knee pressing against her thigh as he does so, and he orders both of them another drink.
Donna asks, tracing the stem of her empty martini glass. It gets taken away by a bartender and she folds her hands in her lap, fidgeting with the strap of her purse. "What are you guys doing here?"
"We were playing pool," Harvey answers, taking hold of his beer, he takes a large chug and draws his bottom lip between his teeth to remove a droplet.
Donna's gaze trails over his face, to his lips and then to her drink.
"And Mike suggested we'd find you," he says and before she gets a chance to ask how they knew, he adds. "Rachel texted where you were." He watches Donna grin into her drink, and when her eyes close he takes a moment to admire her. His earlier words a joke, something to break the ice. It's only now that he realises he might have an answer after all. The thought alone makes him swallow and he shifts over the stool.
They share their drinks in silence until Harvey slides of his stool on a deep exhale. His motion alone enough to get a questioning look in return, her eyebrows raise fully when he extends his hand in front of her.
"Come on," he says, waiting for Donna's hand to glide over his as Harvey bobs his head in the direction of the dancefloor. One glance letting her know that Mike and Rachel are already dancing together- meaning she doesn't have to wait for the brunette to return from the bathroom.
Donna finishes her drink and takes his hand. Sliding off the stool, she moves to bring the handle of her bag over her shoulder, but Harvey takes it from her. She is holding it as he twists her over the dance floor until she lands back into his arms.
She laughs, and he feels his chest widen at the pure sound of it. He does it again, spinning her around until they're both dizzy and three songs in. They're a mixture of limbs. His arm swings around her waist to the small of her back, and her arms link around his neck. A breathy laugh escaping her once more as they still into a sway.
"I thought you didn't like dancing?"
He chuckles and shakes his head. "Grown to like it since it's how we got together."
She smiles softly, still feeling his laughter reverberate through her. She rests her head against his shoulder for a second, trying to catch her breath. They slowly move back and forth now, in complete opposite to the upbeat music echoing through the club around them, and when she feels his thumb press against the exposed skin of her back, she draws her fingertips through the tiny strands of hair at the back of his neck.
"Harvey."
He simply hums.
"About the –"
"I know Zane sent it," he admits.
She lifts her head from his shoulder, and she looks at him again, confused.
"Both your hands were in the picture." He answers as Donna turns away, forehead resting against his shoulder once more. He peers at her from the corner of his eye, hand running over her back. "And since I didn't know if she still had your phone, I couldn't leave it unanswered."
And there she had it, her answer as to why.
"Right," she whispers, forgetting the fact his answer came a good forty minutes later; she's still feeling a little disappointed. "She didn't see it, though."
"Good," He lets out a relieved sigh. "I probably wouldn't have been able to look her in the eye if she did."
Donna laughs again, lightly shaking her head. She creates a little bit more distance between, but she keeps her hands linked behind his head. They sway around, and she turns to look over her shoulder in the direction of where she last spotted the couple.
Harvey mirrors her motion, and they find Mike and Rachel wrapped in one another's arms much like they are, except for the making out on the middle of the dancefloor part. He scrapes his throat and tears his gaze away. "Looks like you're staying the night at mine."
"Yeah."
"Don't sound so disappointed."
She chuckles, rolls her eyes and looks at him again. "You're impossible; you know that."
.
She laughs as she stumbles into his apartment, shedding her coat as she moves from leaning on the right wall to relying on the left wall. She kicks off her left boot and tries to do the same with her right but ends up chucking the heel against the side table as the rest remains hanging on her leg. "Fuck."
Harvey swivels on his spot, hand landing against the door frame as he does so. He watches her stand there, right leg dangling in the air like an unspoken cry for help and he steps forward then. His right-hand reaches for her thigh, the skirt of her green dress riding up a little as he hooks his hand under her knee. Thumb automatically brushing over her skin as he lifts it a little, gaze instantly dropping as he uses his other hand to drag the suede boot down her foot.
It drops to the floor with a loud thud and they both laugh. Harvey snaps out of his daze with that, letting go of her leg at last, Donna turns to lean against the wall with her back. "I can't walk anymore."
He catches the way her feet start to slide over the wooden floor, shoulders low against the wall and he figures it will be way harder to get her up from the floor in a minute than getting her to move now. "Come on," he motions, but she shakes her head with a heavy, tired sigh.
He turns around then, standing right in front of her with his back towards her. He simply looks over his shoulder and bobs his head. He's not going to say it but her eyes lit up all the same. An arm falls to his shoulder as she tries to jump on his back.
She giggles as he almost loses his balance, but he just about manages to hook his hands under her knees. He is hoisting her up once until she clings firmly to his back with her left arm. Her right is attempting to make a lasso motion as she yeehaw's, but she wraps that one around him the second he moves too.
Letting her head rest against his shoulder, she allows him give her a piggy back ride to his room. And while he opens the door, she uses her hand to push it shut behind her, before he moves to the middle of the room. Turning around with his back to his bed, he contemplates dropping her down, but squats and gently lets her sink on the mattress.
Her arms move slower than expected and she pulls him back down with her. Laughter escaping her as they collapse on the duvet. He retaliates with tickling her knees and she tries to catch her breath, but only manages to free one leg from his grasp.
Her fingertips scoot over his shoulder to his neck, mirroring his motion she tickles him and to her surprise he's more responsive than she imagined him to be. Which makes her only laugh harder, and her arms drops to the side as she gasps for air.
Harvey turns around the second her grasp falters, and his hands find her waist in a beat. Tickling once, twice, he crawls up and moves closer with every breathy chuckle he draws out of her and when she turns her head after catching her breath once more, they're face to face, noses almost brushing against one another.
He finds himself drawing in a deep breath, his gaze slipping to her mouth as he does so. He catches the way her tongue darts out to wet her lips and he doesn't know he's doing the same but he can't keep looking, so he averts his gaze only to find it locked with hers and while she isn't touching him, the biggest shiver runs down his spine all the same.
He swallows thickly, panic rushing over him causing him to do the only thing he finds himself capable of doing. Fingers moving over her sides, another tickle.
She curls up instantly at his attack, pulling her right leg up in a way to shield her frame.
His eyes water the second it happens, her knee hitting him full in the groin and he rolls to the side in a beat. "Fuck," he groans in pain. "Aah."
"Ooh, my god," she mutters, her laughter long gone. She scrambles onto her knees and looks at him curled up on his side. "Harvey," her hand hovers above his arm, but she doesn't touch him. "I'm so-"
He says he's fine but she hears the pain in his voice and Donna rushes to the kitchen. Opening up the fridge's freezer compartment, she searches for ice but pulls out a bag of frozen peas instead.
Harvey groans and moves to a sitting position; resting his head in his hands he remains rooted on his spot. Barely glancing up when he hears her footsteps halt near him.
"Here."
He looks a little confused but takes the bag anyway, hissing as the cold pack rests on his crotch and he curses again.
"I uhm," Donna rocks back and forth on her feet. "I'll go get ready."
He merely hums and adjusts the frozen peas a little, remaining in his spot until she returns a couple of minutes later. This time she sits down next to him, her knee resting against his thigh and the cold aside. He still feels his body stiffen when she rests her hand on his knee. Harvey pushes himself to stand before she gets the chance to speak.
When he returns, he finds her ginger manes spread out over a pillow, two big hazel eyes peering up at him and he can't help but grin by the time he slips under the covers.
"Are you okay?"
"I am," he reassures her. "Just kind of forgot what that felt like."
"Sorry."
"It's fine," he says. "Just try not to kick me in your sleep okay."
She grins and shakes her head.
.
Wednesday, December 19
He wakes to a thud against his nose. It's not hard but it's enough to rouse him from his sleep. Opening one eye he scans his surroundings, the room still dark and his alarm tells him it's only a quarter past four in the morning.
He turns on his side, facing her now and he watches her for a moment. Thinking it was just an one-off until he notices her move again. Except this time, it's not just her sleeping restlessly she's mumbling things too.
"No."
He frowns, props himself onto his elbow and then he hears it again.
"No, don't, please."
"Donna," he whispers, scooting closer a bit and her heel hits his shin. He hisses, flinches at the memory of the accident a couple of hours prior. He mumbles her name once more, but instead of waking, she keeps tossing and turning. The frown on her face becoming more severe in her sleep, and he realises she has a bad dream.
"Hey," he whispers, stretching his arm and gently running it over hers. He feels her tense under his touch and her mumbles become louder. "Donna," he tries again, scooting closer until he can wrap her up in his embrace. "I got you."
"Please." She shivers but stills, her kicking slowing down, and he hears her breathing settle too.
"I got you, Donna," he whispers once more, feeling her relax more every second he holds her against his chest. He runs his left hand through her hair. "I won't let anything happen to you. Ever," he adds, tilting his head just so, lips brushing against her forehead. "I –"
Love you.
He feels his chest tighten as the words die on the tip of his tongue, and he closes his eyes. Holding her close in his embrace, he tries to ignore the words he almost spilt. Words, deep down, for years, he'd known to be true.
He doesn't say them, but he falls asleep with the three little words on repeat in his mind and her in his arms.
.
Harvey wakes hours later to the sound of a phone going off. He groans; he runs his hand over his face and rolls over in his bed. Harvey finds the other side empty, and he briefly gets distracted by the absence of a particular redhead when the ringing pierces through again. He blindly grabs object and answers the call to stop the intruding noise.
"Good morning, honey."
He nearly drops the phone at the female voice coming though and his "what?" comes out instantly.
"Donna?"
He pulls the phone back and peers at the screen now.
Mom
He stares at Donna and her mother's photo and takes a second for everything to make sense. Eyes widening as it does, he quickly brings the phone back to his ear.
"Harvey?" Clara asks now.
"Mrs Paulsen," he answers, moving into a sitting position. He eyes the alarm again. It's not even nine in the morning.
"Why are you –" It falls silent for a moment before Clara's voice returns from the other end of the line, and it's the longest 'ooh' he's ever heard. "I get it."
"Uhm."
"Don't worry," Clara adds in before he gets to say something. "I know she would want to tell me herself, so don't tell her I know. Okay. I'll call her later. Bye."
The call ends after that, and he drops it in his lap. Shaking his head, he runs his hand through his hair and wonders what the hell happened and how exactly he'd gotten them into this mess. Her mother didn't need to say more for him to realise which conclusion she'd drawn. It's always the same one, except this time, this person drawing said assumption was a problem.
One they'd signed. Rule number four.
"Fuck," he mutters; pushing the sheets aside, he pats to the kitchen. Wrecking his brain on how to bring this up to Donna. How to explain to her that her mother knows of their charade, and just like everyone else, believes it, to be honest.
"Don.." he swallows in the rest of her name when he spots Tanner sitting at the kitchen island and the redhead in question standing on the other side, flashing him a wide smile.
"Coffee?"
He nods, stalls near the counter and eyes Tanner for a moment, wills him away but the other guy remains rooted on the spot too long for him to speak first again. And Donna's subject takes him completely off-guard.
"You know," she hands over the coffee. "I had a weird dream about you."
Tanner chuckles into his cup and glances back and forth between the two of them. "Was he naked?"
Donna rolls her eyes at his comment. "I said dream, not nightmare."
"Ouch." It's Tanner saying it, but Harvey feels it all the same. Even if he knows it's nothing but a joke.
She laughs. "Anyway. I guess I was being chased by something or someone. It was dark and real creepy, felt like there was no way out until something grabbed my arm and pulled me away. It was still dark, and I couldn't see who or what was holding me, but I heard your voice. Telling me, I'm safe now. I won't let anything happen to you, ever… and I -"
"Love you?!"
The squeal that follows the voice, makes both Donna and Harvey turn around. Their eyes widening when they face Rachel and Mike right behind her. The two people they figured would be at Donna's place.
Harvey swallows, looks down and feels his chest tighten in the same way it did last night. He didn't say it, not out loud, but Rachel's guess is spot on. He moves the coffee around in his cup, tries to look in Donna's direction without actually doing so, gauging her answer.
Donna remains rooted on her spot too; she doesn't remember that being a part of her dream. Doesn't remember him saying that, not at that moment. She thinks about the recording from a few weeks back but shakes her head and shrugs.
"I can't remember, actually," she admits, pressing her lips into a thin apologetic line. She takes the last sip of her coffee and places her cup into the sink. "I uhm…," she taps her fingers against the counter, eyeing the clock on the microwave. "Am running late."
.
"So did you?" Mike muses when Donna pulls the front door behind her and he plops down on a seat.
"What?" Harvey asks unsure.
"Tell her you love her."
His jaw clenches and he draws in a breath. "I .. uhm.."
"You haven't told her yet." It's a simple statement, no accusation but Mike looks somewhat surprised at his own realisation.
He hasn't and doesn't think he'll ever be able to, not if she doesn't feel the same. He's confident that he'll never recover from uttering those words if she doesn't say them back. He thinks about the rules again, this being another. He wasn't even allowed to say them while pretending.
"She knows," he reasons.
.
Donna walks out of her meeting with professor Bodinski when her phone rings, fishing it out of the pocket of her coat she checks the screen and swipes to answer the call. "Hey mom."
"Hey honey," Clara greets her daughter. "Do you have a minute?"
"Yeah," Donna flings her bag over her shoulder and exist the building. "Just met with miss Bodinski to discuss my graduation, all is on track so that's good. But that's not why you're calling."
"That's excellent," Clara beams. "But you're right. I wanted to confirm when you're coming home. The 23rd or the 24th, cause I know you mentioned this sleep over once and I just want to make sure your father will be here."
Donna goes over the plans in her head, the party Rachel planned on the 23rd. "I'll be home on Christmas eve, mom."
"Okay. And will you stay with us till New Years Eve or do you have plans to celebrate it in the city?"
Donna takes in her mother's question, the latter date in particular. The day they'll break up, end this charade and go back to normal. So far she hasn't thoroughly thought it over yet, hasn't discussed with Harvey how they're going to deal with this. The date just that at the start of this month, now it's this day looming in the near future where she'll have to come to terms with them just being them again.
"I uhm," she starts, a sudden sadness washing over her, and she wishes she had someone to talk to about all of this. About the moments that should be pretend but don't feel like it at all, about the moment she's certain they almost had last night.
"Hey, mom," she starts again. "The other day... uhm... You – "
"Ooh, honey," Clara says. "I'm so happy for you and Harvey."
"What?" Donna asks in surprise, feeling her stomach flip as she freezes on her spot.
"He accidentally answered your phone this morning, and I told him not to say anything and promised I'd act surprised when you'd tell me about the two of you."
Her hand trembles, and her lips part, throat drying up as she presses her eyes shut. Holding back tears that threaten to spill cause the one person she might actually confide in on her true feelings was now a part of this as well.
"Donna?"
She draws in a breath and slowly opens her eyes again, bringing her free hand to wipe across her cheek, she mumbles a yeah in return.
"If you want to bring Harvey along for the holidays, you can."
"No." Her answers comes before she can think it over, but it would have been the same regardless. "No, uhm…" she whispers now, forgoing her plan of telling her mother the truth. "No, he's uhm... He's going to his dad," she explains, and she stares in the distance for a moment. Watching her fellow students walk around, a couple here there, holding hands, she draws her quivering lip between her teeth.
"Okay," Clara's voice comes. "Or if you want to go with him, that's okay too. You know that, right."
She knows, and a tear slips down her cheek because this is precisely why she didn't want her mother involved in it. She would be supportive of them; she would understand, except now she understood it all wrong. "I have to go. I'll see you soon."
She doesn't wait for her mother's reply; she simply exits the call and stands there for a moment. Phone resting in her hand as the snow starts falling, and she cries then. The act they're putting up, her feelings and her family getting involved all becoming too much; the one person she could trust with whatever was going on now taken away from her by the one person she believed in even more.
She unlocks her phone and opens his messages, the photos from last night a stark contrast to what she's typing now. Hurt, betrayed, but most of all confused.
I CAN'T BELIEVE YOU TOLD MY MOM
The message notification turns from 'delivered' to 'read' in a second, and his name flashes on her screen in the next. She lets it ring in her hand for another, muttering up the courage to answer. She does, but she doesn't speak.
"Donna –"
It's only her name, and if she weren't downright pissed now, she would have heard the apologetic tone, but it sets her now. "How could you?" she fires back, repeating it once, twice. She doesn't let him get another word in.
"I'm doing this to help you," she adds, pacing through the snow as she wipes the fresh droplets from her face. "You asked me to put up this fucking charade, remember. You!"
"Donna- "
"Don't Donna me," she cuts him off. "You asked me to do this, and the one thing, the one thing I asked you is to not –" she pauses herself, eyes closing as she tilts her head back to the sky. Her thoughts reeling; she's going over the list in her head.
To not do pet names – but they did, and she likes it.
To not touch, to not have sleepovers – but now she craves it, needs it.
To not pretend when it was just them – but she thinks they did, even if it wasn't really acting anymore on her part.
To not tell their families, and while it's the one that set this all off, it isn't the one that hits the hardest.
"To not," she bites back, shakes her head when her thoughts fill in the rest. To not make me develop feelings – except she did, a lot of them. All of them. The most important one of them – love,
"We're done," she says then. "This is over."