Author's Note: Content warning still applies to this chapter and most definitely the next.
"She's alive, Edward. The boys tracked her down less than an hour ago. We have her."
Relief washed over him, nearly buckling his knees in the unexpected intensity of it. He'd been braced for the worst. He hadn't dared hope for this.
But Alice was still carefully blocking him, and that did nothing to set him further at ease. What it did do was scare the hell out of him.
Chapter 7
He didn't mince words as he pushed his sister away, disentangling himself from her embrace. "Tell me everything." He didn't mean verbally. "Starting with how badly she's hurt."
Alice sighed, doubled down on keeping him out of her head. "Nothing life threatening, at least. It's not as bad as it could have been, but it was bad enough. I'm sorry."
Bad enough. Those words gutted him, despite the fact that he'd already suspected as much, solely based on the fact that it was Alice who had been sent to intercept him — the most proficient member of his family at keeping him out, aside from Carlisle, whom he fervently hoped was the one currently looking after Bella.
No one else was currently within his range, not even Esme — who, after seven months away from her son, would normally have knocked the rest of them over, without remorse, to get to him first.
So there was something else his family didn't want him to know yet — something bad.
Something aside from the details of what had already happened to Bella, because he could see that Alice intended to tell him that much, at least. What could possibly be worse than that?
Alice gave him a very brief verbal synopsis, one she'd rehearsed, apparently. She managed not to picture anything mentally, give anything away that she was still concealing.
Jacob Black had very recently phased for the first time, Edward learned, a truly chilling prospect considering the dog's relationship with Bella. Still, pieces clicked together in his mind. Hadn't Bella said something, just before he revealed himself on the phone, about Jacob cutting off contact with her? If that was the mutt's reasoning, he had to admit a grudging respect. Giving Bella up to keep her safe was a misery he understood well.
But the wolves had been requested by Carlisle to assist in the search, and that meant Jacob Black too. By sheer coincidence, it was Jacob himself, in wolf form, who had followed the right trail and tracked down Bella and her attacker near a cabin far out in the forest, roughly five seconds before Jasper and Emmett arrived on the scene from the opposite direction.
Jacob had believed without question what his eyes and nose told him, that it was Edward Cullen on top of Bella, holding her down on the ground, his hands and mouth all over her as she fought like a wildcat to free herself.
Naturally, Jacob had gone on the attack, without waiting for backup, causing Edward's doppelganger to flee. But Jacob hadn't taken kindly to the arrival of two more Cullens appearing beside Bella, just as he left her to give chase, so he had turned back to snap at Emmett and Jasper.
Emmett took exception to that. Then Jacob's backup caught up to him, in the form of Paul, and things got ugly.
Bella's attacker got away during the scuffle that ensued, as the wolves and vampires went after each other instead of who they should have been chasing. That continued until a terrified Bella tried to run away on her own, finally snapping everybody out of it.
Not that that knowledge — or his utter, complete fury over the way it was handled — would do Edward any good.
He ground his teeth. Hard.
"You're still hiding something from me. Tell me the whole truth, damn it."
One possible reason for Alice's reticence to talk weighed heavily on his mind, and he was done waiting for her to volunteer information. It was a question he both feared and needed to have answered. He remembered every second of the vision that had sent him away, horrifically and vividly.
"Did he... Alice, did he..."
Did he rape her.
He still couldn't say it. Not about Bella, he couldn't.
The pleading look in his eyes said it for him. Alice grabbed his hand sympathetically, but her mind was a steel wall. "No...in the strictest sense of what you're asking, no, but she went through a lot. I won't lie to you, Edward. It was close. Too close."
He felt like his heart literally fell to the ground and shattered. His soft, delicate, warm and caring Bella.
"Define close," he growled, pulling his hand away like Alice's skin burned him. Then he softened his tone, sensing her reluctance to risk upsetting him further when he was already thrumming with violent intensity. "I need to know."
Alice hesitated before nodding her agreement. He still wasn't prepared for what he heard. Mercifully, she did it quickly and briefly, like ripping off a bandage.
"His fingers. He was holding her down, touching her all over, but he wasn't in a hurry. He was fully dressed, so we're pretty sure he didn't rape her. Jasper got the sense that he wanted to toy with her, terrorize her, that doing so was important to him for some reason. He said he seemed almost delighted when they showed up, like he was waiting for them, like their arrival at exactly that point was what he wanted."
Edward balled his fingers into fists so tight his hands shook, reeling as he figured it out.
This wasn't over. Not even close.
"It was what they wanted," he managed through his fury. "This was just a warning shot, one meant to get me back here. They plan to go after her again, right under my nose. And for some reason, they're confident they'll succeed."
Alice started feverishly translating in her head again, which wasn't reassuring. He was getting too close to the truth, apparently.
It was too much. Edward's body vibrated with rage. He wanted to do violence. He wanted to find the lowlife who dared violate his Bella and end him.
All of him wanted that.
The vampire, his monster, wanted to hunt, to stalk, to track down his enemy and slowly rip off any vile part that had touched Bella, then feed it to him.
The human wanted to just throw punches until the bastard's face split open.
He was going to do all of that.
But Bella needed to come first. And to make sure she was taken care of properly, he needed to know every detail, regardless of what it would do to him.
Too close, Alice had said. Touching her all over.
He briefly closed his eyes to steel himself. When he opened them, he managed to keep his voice soft, his question clinical.
"How far did it go? Was there...digital penetration?"
Was he going to be ripping off that bastard's fingers before or after his other appendages...
Alice winced. "Most likely. She hasn't volunteered details yet, but my gut says yes. Contact, at the very least. I'm so sorry, Edward."
The muscles in his jaw worked. "And he was me? The entire time?"
The way Alice looked away was answer enough.
The hot fury he'd been holding in check so he could get information finally consumed him, rage that needed a target. It was easier than facing the utter devastation that threatened to swallow him whole.
Did Bella believe it was him when it happened? Did she still? He couldn't even face the thought, much less ask the question.
Yes, rage was easier. Vengeance was a lot goddamn easier.
He only had one more question he intended to put voice to, and his teeth were bared before he even began talking.
"Who is he, Alice? Who the fuck is he?" His venom rose, his fists clenched. He needed to kill.
"We don't know," she told him honestly. "He's working with Victoria, obviously, but we don't understand why he's helping her or even how he knows you. None of us recognize his scent, and it seems he can manipulate it somehow, leave a fog of false scent trails that take time to dissipate and reveal his true path with his true scent. There were at least three distinct trails, originally, all of them yours, until the fog faded and revealed which trail was real. That's why it took all night to find them. It's a perfect duplication. I'd have believed you were there myself."
He processed that quickly, and it was terrifying. His enemies couldn't be allowed to get their hands on Bella again. With that kind of head start, there was a very real risk that he might not be able to catch up to them, despite his speed.
"Where's Bella now?" His muscles coiled, desperate to run, to get to his mate and protect her personally.
"She's at our house. Emmett carried her straight to the hospital, with Jacob on his heels, but we can protect her better at home. This guy might be able to walk into the hospital and impersonate any one of us, Carlisle included. So Carlisle checked her vitals in his office, then smuggled her out and took her home."
"Good. I'll drive," he said by way of reply, his feet already moving.
But Alice grabbed his arm to stop him. He turned back to face her impatiently, not really prepared for the crushing blow that was about to come.
"Edward...you should know that Jacob Black is there with her. He insisted and so did she. Honestly, they both freaked out a little bit about going to our house, but Carlisle just wasn't taking any chances with her until you could get here and decide how you want to handle things. He insisted on it and somehow convinced Jacob she was safer there for now, but the mutt doesn't plan on leaving her alone. And to be honest, she doesn't want him to. I know that's not what you want to hear."
Quite honestly, the Jacob part barely registered. But an aching dread filled Edward when Alice said Bella didn't want to be at his house. There was only one thing he could take from that.
She was scared of him.
And she had every right to be, considering. But be that as it may, the only thing that scared him more than not putting eyes on Bella immediately was the prospect of watching her recoil in fear when she saw his face. His near immediate mental image of her reaching out to Jacob Black for protection — from him — made him feel genuinely physically ill.
He closed his eyes briefly, feeling very...displaced, like he belonged nowhere. He took a deep breath...and changed course.
He couldn't do it. Not to her, and not to himself.
There was another way he could help her, though, without inflicting himself on her. His monster was going to get what it wanted, even if his heart didn't.
"I see. Thank you for telling me, Alice." His tone had gone completely formal. "You mentioned a trail with his true scent. Where is that, exactly?"
Alice stared at him. "This is not what I meant. Don't you think you should go to Bella first? Let her know you're here for her too?"
"Where, Alice?" he growled, fear and anger boiling over in equal measure. No, he definitely couldn't face Bella yet. He had disturbingly little control over his rage at what had been done to her. He'd scare her half to death, even if she wasn't already terrified of him. "If I'm going to find this guy and make her safe again, I need to know his scent. His real scent."
Alice stared at him disgustedly, finally shook her head. "If that's what you want, there's an easier way than going to the scene. Carlisle has her clothes bagged in the safe in his office at the hospital...well, what's left of them." She winced sympathetically. "There's plenty of his scent there. Trust me."
Edward nodded his agreement curtly. "Thank you."
"You're not even going to try to see her?" Alice persisted, as he turned his back and walked away from her.
After all he'd just heard, what could possibly make Alice or anyone else believe that Bella wanted to see him?
"Not until I know she wants me to," he said softly, not turning back to look. He knew Alice heard him.
This had been a bad idea, he realized soon after.
The first scent that assaulted his nostrils when he entered his father's office at the hospital — alone, because Alice hadn't followed him — was Bella's blood.
It didn't have quite the same effect as normal, although his venom still rose.
The effect it had was rage. Pure, blinding, murderous rage.
Someone had hurt her. Made her bleed. Someone who disguised their vile self as him when they did it.
He picked up the other vampire's scent immediately, committed it to memory, but it wasn't one he knew. And yet something about it seemed almost familiar, just like the voice on the phone. Not a vampire he'd met, because he would remember that. He couldn't place it. That fact only infuriated him further.
He'd come looking for his enemy's scent on Bella's clothes. But it was the clothes themselves that were nearly his undoing.
There was only one intact piece of clothing in the entire bag, and he recognized it, both in appearance and lingering scent. It didn't belong to Bella. One of Emmett's hoodies. It would have swallowed her whole. He must have taken it off and put it on her after they found her, and it was easy enough to see why.
Alice had left out some details.
Bella's pretty blue shirt was ripped to shreds, right down the middle, to the point he knew it would have covered nothing. Her bra was no better, violently torn in half. He couldn't bring himself to linger on that. Touched her all over, Alice had said, and his fists clenched at the thought.
But it was the last items out of the bag, her jeans and panties, that made him put his fist straight through Carlisle's heavy oak desk, splitting it right down the middle.
He hadn't fully grasped why Alice seemed so certain she'd been sexually assaulted, touched — and he hadn't been prepared to.
He knew now.
The button on her jeans was missing, the zipper destroyed. The entire front was violently ripped in two, from waist to crotch. The legs were ripped, stained with dirt, just like the back of her shirt.
He'd thrown her on the ground.
Her panties — her delicate panties, her last boundary against her even more delicate flesh — were in two pieces.
Edward growled furiously, far louder than he should dare in a public building, as he slammed his fist back into the ruined desk over and over, pulverizing it beneath his heavy blows.
That bastard was going to die. Slowly and very goddamn painfully. He was going to take his fucking time.
He was still taking his wrath out on the heavy antique furniture, so he didn't hear his father enter his office, didn't even register his presence, his voice calling his name, until strong arms grabbed him and pulled him into an embrace.
He angrily tried to push away, but Carlisle held on tight. Weakened by grief, emotion, and starvation, Edward quickly stopped resisting.
Carlisle held him tightly. "She's alive, son. She's alive, and she's going to need you. Focus on her. We're going to find him for you, I promise you that. If I have to track him down myself, we'll find him for you both."
He dropped his head to Carlisle's shoulder and clung to the only father he'd known for a century, shuddering and shaking with mingled pain and fury.
"She's asking for you."
Edward sat on the floor in Carlisle's office some time later, leaned against the wall, his face buried in his hands as he tried to prepare himself for what he knew he needed to do next.
Carlisle had gone back home to check on Bella as soon as Edward calmed enough to allow it. He had only left her in the first place because Alice came to relieve him, giving him a heads-up where Edward was headed.
The very second he realized that, Edward got it together. Carlisle left soon afterward, at his urging.
Edward now looked up at the approach of Alice, with her arms crossed.
She didn't have to worry. He'd already made up his mind that he was going to Bella the second he had himself back under control, just as soon as he knew he could face her and appear at least outwardly calm, without flying into a vengeful rage at what had been done to her. But at Alice's words, his long-dead heart still felt like it dropped in his chest at the thought of walking into that room.
Because he was really going to do this. He was going to see Bella, face to face, for the first time in seven months.
And then he would know.
He would know if Bella thought it was him who attacked her, who tried to rape her, for God's sake.
He'd know if she blamed him, regardless of who she thought hurt her.
He'd know all of that the second he looked into her eyes. And the thought terrified him.
Alice fixed him with a no-nonsense glare. "I said she's asking for you, and so help me God, you're going to her if I have to drag you all the way there myself. Don't think I can't do it."
But he'd already made up his mind to do exactly that, long before Alice entered the room. So after scrubbing his hands over his face one more time, he sprang to his feet.
And near staggered.
Alice huffed impatiently, narrowing her eyes as she finally took a better look at him than she had at the airport. She looked utterly appalled. "Correction. I'm taking you for a quick hunt first, and you're going to like it. Then you're going to take a shower and put on whatever I hand you to wear, and you're going to like that too. Then you're going to see Bella, mutt or no mutt."
"I'm fine," he told her flatly. "I'm going to her now."
"When's the last time you hunted?"
"Irrelevant. I won't hurt her."
He should have figured that out seven months ago, he raged inwardly as he started for the door.
Alice blocked his path.
"Or showered?"
The deadly growl in his chest was a warning. Alice growled right back, and he gave it up and sighed.
"She's waiting for me, Alice."
"She's been doing that for seven months. What's a few more hours?"
His eyes closed, all the fight draining out of him. "I need to know. I need her to know that I...that I'd never..."
Her hand on his arm made him flinch. "She knows that, Edward. Even if part of her has forgotten it right now, she knows. If you're going now, I'll go with you. Then you promise to let me take you hunting and to get cleaned up. Agreed?"
He swallowed the lump in his throat that shouldn't even be there, and nodded.
Then he ran purposely toward his house with Alice at his side, toward the girl he'd left behind seven long months ago, in a futile effort to preserve her from this very fate.
It wasn't until he got close enough to his house to hear Bella's heartbeat that he felt like he could breathe again. He was so intently focused on locating it that he barely noticed anything else.
At least until he stopped right in his tracks in the edge of the woods outside his house, because someone else's thoughts were screaming at him from inside.
He really hadn't needed to get his first glimpse of Bella through Jacob Black's thoughts.
She was in Edward's room on his couch — definitely not where he'd expected to find her, although certainly the location in the house that offered her the most privacy, more so than the living room. She was upright, propped up against one armrest, legs stretched out across the seat. Her hair was damp, like she had showered recently. She wore what looked like one of his t-shirts and pairs of sweatpants he'd left behind, which also made sense, even if it momentarily threw him. It wasn't like she had been expecting this and packed an overnight bag or anything, and his sweats were certainly more comfortable than anything in Alice's closet. There was a blanket from the hospital loosely draped across her legs.
Most of his focus was drawn to her face. Her lip was split. There were tear tracks down her cheeks, and a bruise just starting to form on her cheekbone. Edward's fists clenched at the sight.
She wasn't alone. Jacob Black knelt protectively on the floor in front of her, holding her hand. Edward knew that because Jacob's focus shifted continually between her tiny, fragile hand in his large one, back to her frightened face, awed at the way she clung to him and watched him like she was afraid he might disappear any second.
She needn't have worried. Jacob wasn't going anywhere. Edward could see that for himself.
Their closeness was like a punch to the gut. Bella had apparently forgiven Jacob, at least, for his disappearing act, and this wasn't some meaningless rebound relationship as he had hoped. The two had developed a real connection in his absence. Bella relied on him; trusted him. Which was probably more than he could say for himself at the moment.
The boy's thoughts might have been obnoxiously loud, but to his annoyance, Edward couldn't find much there that he could really disagree with. Protectiveness, mostly. A healthy dose of adoration. Grief over what had happened to her, self-flagellation that he hadn't been there to stop it sooner. And Jacob was on high alert for anything that might threaten Bella, relishing the idea of putting an end to anything that did.
It wasn't like Edward could argue with any of that.
He already knew enough to know that no matter how much he would like to rip his rival for Bella's affections into shreds, natural enemy or not, he owed him everything. Bella had only survived the past few months because of him. She'd told him as much herself, on the phone. Or she had told "Alice", rather.
Jacob's focus changed abruptly when he picked up Alice's and Edward's scents outside. He started obsessively watching the bedroom door, looking for Edward, making the prospect of visiting Bella much more difficult. Jacob was young, short on control. The very sight of Edward could cause him to phase, far too close to her. Especially after what he had seen earlier.
"Cozy, isn't it?" The irritated voice came from beside him. Edward forced himself to focus on Alice, who had a knowing look on her face as she watched him listening in on Jacob Black's mind.
He'd all but forgotten she was there. Her tone was sarcastic, conveying her irritation with the Jacob situation pretty clearly.
"Welcome to my world for the last few months," Alice sniped. "I'm going to be so happy when you put the dog out...for good."
She had more faith than he did, at the moment, that he'd be able to get rid of Jacob. Not physically, because he knew he could do that. He'd love to do that. Emotionally, he wasn't so sure Bella would let him put the dog out.
Like she had heard that thought, Alice hesitated as she turned back to him one last time. "Edward...you know that Bella's been through a lot, right? She's not herself right now. And they're...close."
"I know," he cut Alice off softly. He had some understanding of what he faced, what Bella was likely to go through in the aftermath of what happened to her. "I love her, Alice. I'm not giving up on her. No matter what."
If he was expecting an argument, he was wrong. Alice smiled approvingly. "Good."
If Edward had suspected before that there was something his family still hid from him, he was completely sure of it when he realized no one else was in the house aside from Bella, Jacob, and Carlisle.
No Esme. No Rosalie. Still no Jasper or Emmett. None of them were anywhere within his range.
He was being avoided to protect a secret. It set him even more on edge than he already was. But at the moment, it wasn't his top priority. Seeing Bella was.
Alice went in first. To prepare Bella, she said. He couldn't linger on that thought, the idea that Bella had to be prepared to see him. It just hurt way too damn much.
In reality, Jacob needed to be prepared just as much as Bella did. Edward wasn't setting foot in that door until Jacob was under control.
He listened intently to every word spoken in his room, of course. "Preparing Bella" generally consisted of making sure she and Jacob both understood that the Edward who was about to walk in wasn't the same one who had thrown her down in the woods and ripped her clothes off. Of course, Alice didn't put it that way. It didn't change the fact that that was the way Edward heard it.
The only thing Bella said was "Okay", which told him exactly zero about her state of mind.
He waited until he deemed Jacob calm enough, then gently knocked on his own bedroom door.
It was Alice who called out for him to come in.
Jacob now stood between the door and the couch, his stance defensive. His thoughts were a harsh challenge to just try removing him. He had no intention of budging from his place between the two of them. He didn't seem worried about Alice behind him, though, who perched on the arm of the couch behind Bella, her hand on Bella's shoulder.
"That's close enough, bloodsucker," Jacob spit. If he goes near her, I'm not responsible for what I'll do.
Jacob and his bitter thoughts may as well have not been there. It was Bella that Edward focused on the second he stepped in the door and froze into place.
Her eyes were cautious, although they met his steadily enough. She spoke first.
"Edward? Is it...is it you?" She didn't shrink away, exactly, but her fingers nervously twisted the blanket she had now pulled securely up above her chest. Her eyes searched his face wildly, ran over his entire form, like she was looking for something.
He could only nod, not trusting his voice, as his eyes drank her in. Neither Jacob's thoughts nor Alice's verbal descriptions had given him the full picture, and it was a shock.
Far too much of her creamy skin was turning black and blue. Freshly blossoming finger bruises dotted her wrists and forearms, encircling them. Those same angry circles also marred the soft skin of her biceps where they peeked out from beneath the short sleeves of his t-shirt she wore. Marks he knew were from hands identical to his.
God, he'd had enough of bruises around Bella's wrists after what he'd done to her himself when he kidnapped her. It wasn't something he had ever wanted to see again. They hadn't faded for weeks the last time, flooding him with guilt every time he saw her. Those had been ligature marks, from her struggles after he'd tied her up when he had to leave her to hunt.
That had been bad enough. These would match his hands and fingers exactly, like he had done that to her, left her bruised and marked.
His eyes drifted back to the angry bruise blossoming on her cheekbone, her split lip, and he actually thought he would be sick. Bella had been looking up at what she believed to be him, had seen his hands coming at her when they were inflicted.
Jacob wasn't helping. He knew exactly what Edward was looking at; he was thinking about her injuries too. More specifically, he was hoping that what he'd heard was true, that Edward Cullen really could read minds. He wanted Edward to be subjected to everything Jacob had seen when he first found Bella, including the angry red marks that extended to areas of her body currently not visible — areas where there were surely even more bruises forming.
Like on her thighs. The insides of them. Where they'd very obviously been pried and held apart with a great deal of force, as she fought to keep them closed.
Edward got the picture, loud and clear. Jacob's mind was a vivid one.
He clamped down hard on the utter fury threatening to consume him, the growl building in his chest. This wasn't the place for it.
There was going to be a place for it, though. Soon. He promised himself that. Promised it to her too, silently, in his own heart. He would find that bastard, and he would make him pay. He would make him pay dearly. His fists clenched at his sides.
"It's really him," Alice was assuring Bella gently, and that snapped him out of it. He realized he'd been standing there motionlessly, staring, making her more uncomfortable. "I'll prove it," Alice told her. "Watch this."
Alice turned her attention toward him, making a ludicrous face in his direction to indicate she was throwing her thoughts his way. Unnecessary of course, but if the theatrics helped calm Bella, he'd gladly go along.
You owe me so much. A Porsche is a lovely way to say thank you. And for the love of God, Edward, would you try to smile or blink or something?
Gratitude for Alice flooded him at the same time that he cursed himself for his own stupidity. He'd been so hung up on Bella's injuries and Jacob's thoughts that he never considered Bella might want proof of which version of him was looming at her door.
"Of course, Alice. What color do you want?" he replied aloud to Alice's thoughts.
His voice was raspy with emotion, but the tiny smile he managed was at least somewhat real. Alice more than earned her Porsche just for finding a way to reassure Bella, who was looking over her shoulder at Alice intently. It didn't escape his notice how her shoulders slightly relaxed when Alice nodded at her that he'd given the correct response.
He made a mental note to instruct his family to use the same trick to test him every time he'd been out of their sight, especially in Bella's presence. If his family ever showed back up, he thought wryly. The entire situation was surreal.
"Yellow," Alice beamed at him before turning back to Bella. "See? It's him. Edward's going to buy me a car."
But Jacob scoffed angrily. He still wasn't completely sold that there was a difference between the two Edwards. The urge to break his jaw surged, but Edward clamped down on that too.
He was going to have to get his anger under control, and soon. Or better yet, exorcise it all on Victoria and her accomplice, when he made them beg for death.
The issue of his identity resolved, Bella was looking at him expectantly now, waiting, and so was Alice.
That was the very moment that the crushing weight of responsibility dropped onto his shoulders like a load of bricks. What the hell was he supposed to do? What the hell was he supposed to say?
According to what Alice had told him, even Carlisle intended to defer to how he wanted to handle the situation. Bella was his mate. The responsibility was rightfully his, and he wouldn't have trusted anyone else to take it anyway.
But while standing there, looking into Bella's nervous face, waiting for him to have the right words to fix this, the problem was that he had no answers. He didn't have the first clue what to say or do, especially not when the very sight of him probably made matters worse.
His touch, he feared, would be infinitely worse.
What he really wanted, more than life itself — even more than he wanted to avenge her — was to pull Bella into his arms and just hold her, feel her heart beating against his chest from the safety of his embrace and know that she was safe. If he could, he would just pull her right inside his chest and keep her there forever, protected.
He was fairly certain none of that was an option, not when she still looked a little wary and Jacob oozed outright suspicion. He could ask if she was okay, but God, he could see that for himself. She wasn't even close to okay.
If he were to be truthful with himself, neither was he.
But he was still standing just inside the door, and the only person he had actually spoken to so far was Alice, and that wasn't going to get them anywhere.
"May I come in, Bella?" he asked politely. Too politely. Like he was talking to a complete stranger. The fact that it was his own room he was asking permission to enter just made things even stranger.
"I told you that's close enough," Jacob warned, shifting his weight and tensing, and Edward scanned his thoughts again. At the moment, the boy's focus centered only around keeping control, not phasing in front of Bella unless absolutely necessary. He didn't want her scared of him too.
That "too" was a blow that landed squarely in Edward's gut.
"And I wasn't asking you, Jacob." His anger flared again, but he kept his tone quiet. His eyes never left Bella. When she shuddered, he realized just how menacing he probably looked despite his calm tone. His eyes were pitch black from not having hunted, and he was more than a little disheveled. "I was asking her."
"Jacob, it's okay," Bella's soft voice cut in, washing over him. Despite everything, she was intervening on his behalf. It made him want to hold her all the more. He focused on staying put.
Jacob didn't like it, but he stepped aside, his frame tense. It struck Edward just how powerful of a creature Bella truly was, whether she realized it or not. She had both a vampire and a werewolf, both a thousand times stronger than her, yet both completely at her command.
You do read minds, right? One wrong move, leech. That's all I need. Watch yourself.
Ignoring Jacob and not giving any indication whether he heard him or not, Edward walked carefully closer toward the couch. He relaxed slightly, once he was past Jacob and in between the two of them. At least now if Jacob lost control and phased, he was in a position to protect Bella. He could clear a path for Alice to get her out of the room safely, if necessary. And if the arrogant, reckless mutt lost an appendage or two once Bella was out of sight, well, things happen.
But as he drew closer to Bella, his next problem became instantly clear. Aside from the couch where Bella was stretched out, there was nowhere else in the room to sit. He didn't dare kneel in front of her as Jacob had done, trapping her between himself and the couch. He certainly wasn't about to stand over her either, towering above her, forcing her to look up at him. Especially not when she chewed on her lip harder the closer he got, her fingers nervously twisting in the blanket.
He hated this.
He stopped several feet away, hesitating, and was surprised when she solved his problem herself. Straightening up against the arm of the couch where she leaned, she pulled her legs in and tucked her feet up beneath her, clearing the rest of the couch for him. She winced when she moved, and he tried desperately not to obsess over what hurt and why.
"Sorry," she nervously apologized as she shifted, like it had been rude of her not to offer him a spot earlier.
His head was spinning as he quickly sat on the opposite end. He counted it a victory that she was comfortable enough to allow him in the same space. At the same time, his heart ached at the way she tried to make herself as small as possible on the other end, pushing back into the edge farthest from him, partially leaning against Alice, who rubbed her shoulder soothingly from her perch on the armrest.
"Not at all," he replied softly. "Thank you." He had to get past this formality he seemed stuck in, but he was so far out of his comfort zone with her at the moment that he didn't know where to start.
"No, it's your room," she blurted out, seeming uncomfortable about that, picking at the blanket. "I'm sorry. I told them this wasn't necessary."
She thought she was intruding? His problems went deeper than he'd realized if Bella didn't at least understand how very much he wanted her right there where she was — with him. Having her there, in his space, where he could personally keep an eye on her, was one of the only things actually making his life tolerable at the moment.
He tried and failed to catch her eye and he wouldn't presume to touch her, so he put every ounce of tenderness he felt for her into his voice instead.
"No, it's yours, Bella, for as long as you like. You're safe here, I promise."
She looked up at him, finally, and there were tears in her eyes. "Are you staying?" she asked, and bit into her lip as soon as the words were out. Like she hadn't meant to say them. Or like she feared the answer.
He didn't even understand the question. Staying in Forks? Staying with her? Staying in his room? And did she want him near her, or did the idea terrify her?
He made a decision, right then and there. He was going to just tell her the truth, at every opportunity, no matter what she asked him. Complete honesty. Hiding things from her hadn't worked out very well for either of them.
His answer to her question would have been the same, regardless of which version she had really been asking: he wasn't leaving unless she ordered him away. Not even then, so long as her safety was at issue, though he could take care of that from a distance, out of sight, if need be.
He could probably find a better way to word that, though. Preferably one that didn't bring up images of him lurking in the shadows, watching.
He kept his tone quiet, very calm. "I'll stay for as long as you ask me to. It's completely up to you."
Everything he thought he knew told him that should have been something that would help. So he was blindsided by the reaction he got.
Bella's breath shot out of her like he'd just punched her in the gut, her stricken eyes blinking furiously. Her gaze flew to Jacob, who took a step closer in response, looking just as worried as Edward felt. Bella's hand pressed against her chest like she was having chest pains.
Jacob crossed the room in three strides and knelt on the ground in front of her, just as he had been doing when Edward read his thoughts from outside, and grabbed her hand. He didn't approach her carefully, didn't seem worried about whether she would recoil. It was a privilege Edward envied him.
"What is it, Bells?" Jacob asked, with more tenderness than Edward would have given the boy credit for, had he not heard it himself. "Hey...look at me. What's going on?" Jacob did it calmly, with practiced ease and a smile on his face, like it was a normal occurrence for Bella to look like that. Like soothing her was something he had experience with. And it must have been, because he managed to draw her gaze, her panicked breathing ebbing slightly.
"I should go," she got out, and a tear rolled down her cheek. Edward looked on in horror. "I shouldn't be here. I'm going home."
"You can't, Bells," Jacob told her gently, stopping her from getting up.
And Edward's heart sank when he saw in both Jacob's and Alice's thoughts what was coming next.
Alice hadn't told him this part. It hadn't been part of the carefully chosen set of facts in the version he'd heard, probably because it wasn't really the most important thing at that point.
It was about to be.
He wanted to wrench Jacob away from Bella, stop him from telling her, but he wasn't sure of his place.
He still had to try.
"Jacob."
Edward's voice was as calm as he could make it. The boy still started to vibrate with anger at the interruption. He turned in Edward's direction, with his hands still on Bella, and Edward tensed.
"Easy," he warned darkly, and was relieved to see Jacob at least let go of Bella, make a concerted effort to calm himself.
"Perhaps now is not the best time," he pressed after a moment, when Jacob stopped shaking.
So you CAN hear me, Jacob's mind answered. Good to know. But screw you. She has a right to know.
"Why can't I go home?" Bella was asking, her eyes still locked on Jacob. She sounded near panic, and Edward wanted to put his fist right through Jacob's thick skull. "What's going on?"
"There was a fire in your kitchen," Jacob told her, and just as Edward had expected, her eyes widened and she turned completely white.
"I left dinner in the oven," she whispered, and she turned to look at Edward briefly before looking back at Jacob. Anything Edward had planned to say, any comfort he'd wanted to offer, died in his throat.
That wide-eyed look she'd turned on him... was it for support? Or was she seeing the Edward who was to blame for this injustice too, the one who had dragged her away against her will, leaving her house to catch on fire? Was that his fault too, in her eyes? He didn't know, and he wouldn't risk making it worse by opening his mouth.
Jacob had enough to say for them both, apparently.
"It's not your fault, Bells. Charlie's fine. He got called out on an emergency late in the day, so he never made it home before the fire started. Somebody saw the smoke and called 911. They were able to save the rest of the house, but you guys just won't be able to stay there for a while. Charlie's staying at my house with Billy for a few weeks until everything's cleaned up and the kitchen gets rebuilt."
"And I stopped by and talked to Charlie about you staying with me," Alice chimed in right on cue, to Edward's everlasting relief, before Jacob got the chance to make the indecent offer he'd been gearing up for — that Bella could come and stay at his house too. In his room, since Charlie occupied the couch.
Edward dug angry fingers into the armrest beside him, his fingers leaving divots in the leather. He was desperately trying to appear as calm and nonthreatening as possible. But thank God for Alice, because he would have intervened before he allowed Bella to go home with Jacob, his own status in her life notwithstanding.
Jacob did truly care about her. But his absurdly unrealistic thoughts of taking Bella home, holding her in his arms, comforting her, and of that leading to kisses and maybe more in his bedroom, with himself in the role of her hero, were nauseating. How could the boy be so foolish and shortsighted, even given his youth and inexperience?
Edward wanted to pick the pup up by the scruff of his neck, haul him outside and beat some sense and respect into him. And if he tried to put one amorous finger on a traumatized Bella and so much as startled her, Edward wasn't going to restrain that urge.
But for the moment, Bella drew all of his attention again, because she had swung around to face Alice and she looked even paler than she had previously.
Alice had it under control. "Bella? Breathe. Charlie doesn't know anything, okay? You made your wishes on that very clear, and I took care of everything. He thinks the fire was a wiring problem, and he thinks I'm hosting a big sleepover this whole weekend. You still need to call him yourself and 'ask' him, but trust me — he's mostly delighted that you're spending some time with friends, even if it took a fire to get you out of the house and make it happen."
Edward saw Bella partially turn, glance in his general direction out of the corner of her eye before stiffly turning back toward Alice. "You're sure it's okay that I stay here?" she asked quietly.
Jump in here any time, Edward heard in his head from a frustrated Alice, and the sentiment confused him. Alice was the one who had talked to Charlie. How was he supposed to have anything to offer on the subject of what was or was not okay with Charlie Swan?
Alice's thoughts toward him weren't kind when he remained silent, but it didn't affect her tone when she gave up and answered Bella herself. "Bella, we want you here. Right, Edward?"
The question floored him. That was what Bella meant? Whether it was okay with him that she was there?
The fact that he wanted her close was such a given in his own mind that it never occurred to him anyone else might doubt it, least of all Bella. He thought his feelings on that topic were abundantly clear.
He had thought he was doing everything right. He had kept his demeanor, his body language, everything about himself outwardly calm for Bella's benefit since he walked into the room. But judging by the exasperated look Alice threw him over Bella's head — and the way Bella glanced at him with a very unsure expression and then let her gaze drop toward her hands when he took too long to reply — he had overcompensated.
For the first time since he walked into the room, he had some idea of the right thing to say.
"More than anything," he answered simply. His dead heart felt like it flipped over in his chest when Bella's gaze finally came up and locked on him, a tiny spark of hope dawning there. He held onto that eye contact for all he was worth. "Anything I have is yours, Bella, always, including my home. Please stay." He hesitated and then said it anyway. "With me."
He hoped it wasn't too much.
The intensity in his eyes must have been, even if his words weren't. Bella's gaze faltered before fleeing completely, but she nodded her head in agreement as she nervously pushed hair behind her ears and looked back at Jacob. A scowling Jacob.
Edward tried to repress the glow of satisfaction the mutt's unhappiness caused him. This wasn't a pissing contest, he reminded his monster sternly. The stakes were far higher than male pride. Bella needed them both, at the moment. Jacob was currently her go-to for reassurance, as he'd been for months. He would do well to remember that.
"Maybe I could call Charlie now?" Bella asked Jacob, so meekly it almost sounded like she was asking permission. It made Edward bristle. "He'll worry if he doesn't at least hear from me."
But Jacob's brows pulled together in a frown. Her demeanor surprised him too. "Yeah, of course, Bells. Whatever you want. When you're done, I should probably check in with Sam too."
"And I'm taking my brother hunting," Alice announced, her tone leaving no room for argument. "Carlisle and Jacob will both be here, Bella. There will always be at least two of us here, at all times."
Edward barely heard the last half of that, because Bella was suddenly staring at him with stricken eyes again, open hurt in her expression. She bit her lip so hard he was afraid she'd break the skin.
He had no idea why. Not the beginnings of the hint of the first clue.
Or maybe some part of him did. Because without thinking about it, he offered her a tiny smile that he didn't really feel, one meant to be reassuring. "I'm coming back, Bella. You have my word."
TO BE CONTINUED...