Beyond Unreasonable

by Cheriana-1

When Bella is kidnapped and brutally attacked, the face of her attacker is none other than Edward's. But all is not what it seems. Edward said he would protect Bella from anything. But how can he protect her when the face in her nightmares is his own? *trigger warnings inside* New Moon / Eclipse AU. Vampfic.

19. Chapter 19 - Perception

Chapter 19

With each mile Edward ran on his way out of Forks for the second time that night, racing against a deadline that was going to be far too close after his unexpected trip home, the more he could feel it in his bones.

Revenge.

It was going to be his, and it was going to be his that very night. Soon. He could almost taste it.

Victoria, the architect of the plan to so cruelly damage his Bella, was going to die. And he was personally going to be responsible for her demise.

The only way to keep even a loose grip on his sanity was to focus on that, on the victory to come. Dwelling on the awful events that had occurred over the past few hours would only drive him deeper into madness.

Like what Bella had put him through, for example — second only to his own boorish behavior afterward.

He fully expected there to be a very frosty welcome waiting for him, when he returned home to his mate, if she would even allow him near her. Could he truly blame her if she didn't?

Despite his fervent wish to put all of that from his mind and focus on what lay ahead, if only for a little while, he could think of little else. Like a broken record, his mind played it all on a continuous loop as he ran. His legs pumped faster and faster, as though he could run fast enough to escape it.

But even his formidable speed couldn't outrun his perfect vampiric memory.

---

The unexpected phone call from Alice that set the entire debacle into motion, just as he and his traveling companions were beginning to hunt in preparation for battle, made him instantly anxious when he saw his sister's number.

Alice then nervously informing him that Bella gave them the slip and left home hours ago — and had yet to return — was nearly his undoing.

Rational thought ceased. His monster took over, in a way he seldom allowed but couldn't have stopped. All he could hear was that his mate was gone. All he was capable of feeling was an obsessive compulsion to find her immediately, before the trail had time to grow cold.

The fact that it was La Push and the wolves she had run off to was a much smaller part of his consternation than Bella might have believed.

She was out in the open, without his or his family's protection. Vulnerable. It didn't matter where, aside from the fact that wolf territory only further blinded and handcuffed him.

His fury and terror had little to do with Jacob Black... at least at first. That came later, when he smelled that filthy dog's scent all over every inch of his mate the moment she stepped close to him by her window.

Which, not coincidentally, was also the moment he effectively lost his goddamn mind.

But initially, when Alice first called, his reaction wasn't even about Jacob. He would have had the same response if Bella took off anywhere alone.

As he gripped the phone, his mind quickly raced through multiple possible threats his mate could be facing at that very moment, each one more horrifying than the last.

Regardless of Alice's vision predicting Bella was safe from Albert until the next snowfall, decisions could change. What if Albert was nearby, along with Thomas, the shield Victoria had created, and none of them knew it? What if he had been watching all along, concealed by the shield?

What if Victoria's "mistake" had been a trap, as Bella herself suggested when she expressed concern about him going? He had been willing to accept that relatively small risk for himself, seeing as he would have plenty of backup to ensure he made it safely back to his mate either way.

But even the slightest risk to Bella was a different story entirely. What if this was all a trap for her, one designed to lure Edward away from her side?

Even if it wasn't, what if Albert made a snap decision to capitalize on the opportunity of a less protected Bella, either while she was in Quileute territory or in transit between?

Edward wouldn't be able to see it coming, and neither would Alice. They would believe she was still visiting in La Push.

It could have already happened, in fact, with so much time already having passed. Charlie could be dead on the side of the road somewhere on the other side of the boundary, at that very moment, and Bella in Albert's clutches. Edward wouldn't even know about it until far too late.

Like a rope slipping through his hands as he dangled above the precipice, he slipped a little farther into madness.

Yes, he distantly heard Alice telling him through the phone that Bella had arranged protection by the wolves for the second leg of her trip to La Push. It made not one damn bit of difference.

He was now expected to entrust the protection of his mate to a pack of untested and undisciplined young wolves, who could just as easily kill her themselves with one temper tantrum? Not an option. The thought was unconscionable.

He barely heard Alice's profuse apologies, her desperate explanation that Bella had tied their hands by cleverly involving Charlie and refusing to leave his side, making it impossible to intervene without inflaming Charlie's suspicions and risking exposure.

His sister's pleas hardly moved him. His family had failed him. They should have done something: disabled the vehicles, created a distraction long enough to extract Bella when her father wasn't looking, even intervene right in front of the man, if it came down to it.

Something. Anything.

How the fuck could they have let this happen? That burning question went through his mind and right out of his mouth, growled through the phone.

He paid no attention to Carlisle at his side, questioning him, trying to stop him and talk sense into him, get him to stay with them and stick to the plan to ambush Victoria.

There was no help for him. He wouldn't be capable of another rational thought until his Bella was safe in his own arms — maybe not even then, until he got to the bottom of why she'd done this and could find a way to prevent something like it from ever happening again.

He took off running, snarling ferociously, as fast as his legs would carry him. He outran Carlisle, Rosalie, and his brothers in seconds, barely noticing when they broke off the chase and decided to stay behind, to stick to the plan with or without him — despite his being the key to the entire thing, as Alice had made clear.

He didn't care about that, at the moment. He cared about finding Bella. So he didn't slow down for the entire long run, backtracking from the hunting ground they'd chosen far past Seattle, all the way back through Forks, until he ran straight through the barrier of his mother, Alice, and the Denalis, 100 yards from the boundary line to La Push.

They were waiting for him, of course. They knew what he planned, thanks to Alice, and they fully intended to stop him.

He'd known to expect that. And he had no intention of being stopped.

But his family had a plan too. It was Alice's mind he was focused on, as usual, looking for the details. And that was his mistake.

She swerved him. She concealed her thoughts, filled her mind with false plans — and sent him in exactly the direction they wanted him to go.

It still wouldn't have worked, if not for Kate. She managed to tag him with her electric touch, as he plowed through their line.

It was enough to make him stumble, nearly fall.

That slowed him down just long enough for Eleazar and Carmen to give Kate a boost, throw her into a tree in front of him, from which she ricocheted to land right on top of him — her power flowing as soon as she was airborne.

He still tried to keep going, despite her on his back, electrifying his body with her painful touch.

It was a losing battle. She got him to the ground, rolling and tumbling and struggling, less than fifty feet from the line.

It was closer than that by the time their bodies came to rest, landing dangerously close to the border, with Edward convulsing in a tortured arc at Kate's grip.

For over two hours that seemed like an eternity, he viciously fought to break loose, as Kate sent wave after wave of electric agony through his body to keep him down.

It wasn't the pain that made that time so interminable.

His every thought was Bella. He cared little for the excruciating pain coursing through his body, aside from the fact that it crippled him, kept him from his purpose. His mind was preoccupied with blind terror for the wellbeing of his mate.

He had some concept of the passage of time — enough to know that midnight came and went, with no sign of Bella returning in Alice's mind.

He became wholly savage then, doubling his efforts to break free. His struggle was fueled by terror that the wolves had taken it upon themselves to enact what had previously been only a seedling of an idea in Charlie's mind, intentionally planted there by Billy Black, about moving Bella away to La Push and effectively out of Edward's reach.

What if the wolves had capitalized on her presence and put Billy Black's plan in motion? What if she was being held against her will at that very moment, wanting to come back to him and not allowed to? What if she wasn't coming back at all? Surely, she would be back by well after midnight if she intended or was able to return. He yelled and thrashed and snarled, bit and growled and kicked, but the unending flow of electricity kept him prone on the ground, his muscles seizing.

Alice pled with him to stop hurting himself. Esme pled even harder, kneeling as close as possible without touching him. He ignored them both, completely in the grip of his monster and far past the edge of reason.

Kate didn't release him until Alice's relieved, hoarse shout that Bella was on her way back. Alice had been desperately trying to break through the blindness the wolves caused her, without a break, for the past two hours. Her purpose was to find anything that might calm her brother. But the fact that she could see nothing of Bella for that long only compounded Edward's terror — and his determination.

"She's coming!" Alice sounded exhausted. "Edward! I just caught a glimpse. She's nearly here! She's fine!"

Charlie's mind came into his range at almost the very same moment, as the man drove closer to the line on his way home.

But Charlie's wasn't the only mind that had just burst into Edward's awareness. There were wolves everywhere, surrounding the car, more than he had realized existed — meaning even more had phased in the days since Jacob left the Cullen residence, when Edward last eavesdropped on Jacob tuning in to the collective pack mind. Some of the newest members of the pack were barely adolescents, phasing for the first time mere days before. That meant even less self-control and yet more reason to keep Bella away.

Jacob wasn't among the ones guarding the car. He'd been ordered to stay behind, Edward saw in Sam's mind, to avoid hostilities. Jacob wasn't even in wolf form at all, which Edward knew because the boy's mind was the first one he sought, wanting details of what had occurred between him and Bella. The pack knew nothing about that. So Jacob hadn't phased since he was with Bella.

Edward broke free with an infuriated growl when Kate finally stopped the flow of power through him. He jumped to his feet — and soon learned something none of them had known, not even Kate, because there had never been cause for her to hurt someone for that long before.

Even for a vampire, there were apparently some after-effects to being continuously electrocuted for hours.

His muscles spasmed and jumped involuntarily, as though the current still ran through his body. His brain felt sluggish, a step behind. His manual dexterity, while still far superior to that of any human, was lessened considerably. He flexed and tensed his fingers over and over, trying to regain his control over them. They didn't respond the way they should, seizing and jerking.

He was weakened. Compromised. The fact that he was in severe need of a hunt likely didn't help.

Every single bit of that only enraged him all the more.

"Get away from me," he snarled to no one in particular once he was unsteadily on his feet, his voice ravaged. "I'll follow them home and get her myself."

He was pissed off with every single fiber of his being at every single one of his family. What if Bella had needed him, and they had still stopped him? What if she had been injured or even killed while they held him back?

Even he didn't know what he might do.

But he could hear the sound of Charlie's cruiser now, steadily approaching the line. He reached out and found Charlie's mind, could see Bella in Charlie's peripheral vision — her head leaned against the passenger window, her eyes closed, looking exhausted but unscathed. Her chest was rising and falling smoothly.

Relief made him even weaker than Kate's torture.

Anger was right behind the relief. And though some of it was unquestionably toward Bella, the majority of his anger was self-directed. He should have known better than to leave her in her house, alone with her tortured thoughts, regardless of Charlie grounding her.

He'd known Bella was dangerously close to the edge, even before she snapped at Charlie about the motorcycle. He'd seen her spinning farther and farther out of control with each passing day, full of anger and insecurity and God only knew what else. Jasper had subtly warned him about her instability too.

Bella could barely control her tongue anymore, snapping at the slightest provocation. She was on a hairpin trigger already, and he knew that. He'd had his hands full at school recently, just trying to manage every stressor he could for her, to keep her from snapping at the wrong person and attracting unneeded scrutiny.

Was it really so surprising that something had set her off and led to such an extremely ill-advised and ill-timed decision, when he left her completely alone in her house in the midst of a doubly traumatic situation — himself leaving her for the first time since their reconciliation, and her crutch Jacob betraying her to her father?

She was clearly desperate for any kind of control over her own life, and yet more was taken from her by the day. Was it any wonder she went to such extraordinary lengths to grab hold of some by defying him?

She was 18 years old, for God's sake, and struggling with unspeakable trauma. Rebellion against authority of any kind was almost a statistical certainty. He'd all but ensured something like this by throwing orders around and then immediately leaving her to her own devices, with any loophole at all to get around those orders.

It wasn't a mistake he would make again.

His failure to see this coming disgusted him. He never should have allowed Jacob's and Charlie's actions to change his original plan, regardless of Charlie's wish to ground Bella. If he'd simply stuck to the plan and taken her to the Cullen house straight after school despite Charlie, and worried about the damn parental consequences later, Bella wouldn't have had the chance to act out like this. She would have been under the watchful eye of his family, in a controlled situation, and this would have never happened.

Goddamnit, he could have fucking lost her, all to keep Charlie Swan pacified. What the fuck had he been thinking?

She was his responsibility. Ultimately, as her mate, keeping her safe was his job and his alone. And he had managed to lose her again.

He slowly inhaled and exhaled, fighting the twitching and spasming of his muscles for control. Damn it, he didn't have time for this. Bella would be to the line in about a minute.

The temptation to jump in front of that car, snatch Bella out of it and take off with her was strong, to say the least. But he had paid quite a price already to keep Charlie Swan in the dark. He could restrain himself for a few more minutes, until his mate and her father arrived home and he could get her alone. Charlie was already looking forward to crashing into bed the moment he got home anyway, fighting to keep his eyes open. It was all the man could think about.

Edward didn't dare touch Bella yet anyway, not until he had his body fully under control and recovered from the effects of Kate's touch. Though the overall effect was a weakening one, aftershocks still rippled and spasmed through him like the occasional power surge, leading to reflexive muscle contractions of unpredictable strength. That could be catastrophic, if he had his hands on Bella when it happened.

So he forced himself to stand down and think. Leaving her home alone, even with his family right outside, clearly wasn't going to work. He needed a new plan...another new plan.

"Esme, was the new bed delivered yet?" he requested through clenched teeth.

"It's already set up in your room," his mother assured him, concern for both him and Bella seeping out of every pore, infusing her every thought. "We had everything ready for her there, before Charlie called and canceled."

Edward took a measured breath, made a concerted effort to rein in his temper at that reminder of Jacob Black's treachery. Had the mutt not thrown a wrench into the plan by taking that godforsaken motorcycle to Charlie, Bella would be safely in Edward's old room at that very moment, having a sleepover with Alice and a comfortable place to sleep, further guarded by his mother and the Denalis. Her trip to La Push would have never happened.

He was at least going to make sure it didn't happen again, but the Cullen house was no longer an option for securing her. Charlie would go looking for her there first, just as soon as he woke up the next morning and found his grounded daughter gone without a trace.

"I need all of you to meet me at the cottage. Bring the bed down from the main house and put it in the living room," he instructed. "Not the bedroom. The living room. I'll bring her there as quickly as I can get her there." He tried to keep the bite out of his tone, keep his words as cordial as possible, if only because he could see exactly how uneasy Esme was becoming with all of this already.

He didn't have time for another argument like the one he'd had with Rosalie that day at lunch, accusing him of taking things too far.

For the record, I still think the bed's a bad idea, he heard in his mind from Alice. She was wise enough not to voice it, at the moment. He'd already had that argument at lunch too, when he first decided it was necessary to provide better sleeping arrangements if Bella was going back to the Cullen home overnight. Alice had warned him that Bella might or might not freak out about it.

Yes, he understood the potential for it to be a touchy topic. But he'd just be damned if Bella was getting dropped back into his bedroom without him, with nothing more than that ridiculous futon she'd slept on in the first horrible days after her attack. That could only bring back painful memories, and he wouldn't even be there to hold her if it was just all too much. Something new and more comfortable to sleep on had to be better than that — a reminder that although he might not be there, he was still thinking of her, trying to take care of her.

And if he was finally getting to buy her something anyway, he was at least getting her something nice — translation, lavish and expensive.

He could simply make it very plain that it was for sleeping only.

With his last few moments before Bella reached the boundary line, he concentrated on his evolving plan for how to deal with Victoria, how he was still going to pull off the kill with so many lost hours and no time to hunt or get into position — and he watched the possible outcomes in Alice's head.

"Edward, no," his sister breathed, horrified. "That's too risky. The timing would have to be perfect, and you barely have enough time now to make it. There are no guarantees. It's 50-50 at best."

"Victoria dies tonight," he spat, ignoring the way his knee nearly buckled beneath him with a sudden residual shock of electricity. "All of this changes nothing. Just be ready when I drop Bella off, and for the love of God, keep her there this time." His head shot up, eyes going to the boundary. Charlie had picked up some speed. Bella was nearly to the line.

He didn't say another word to anybody. He left his family staring after him, trying to decide whether or not someone should follow him, as he began to stalk angrily toward the line. His legs still twitched and jumped beneath him as he got into place to intercept the car and run alongside it the rest of the way to Bella's house.

"1:42," Alice called after him. "If you leave her house one second later, you won't make it in time."

---

That deadline should have given him plenty of time. The Swans pulled into their driveway at precisely 1:18. He would have roughly 24 minutes alone with Bella to talk, to find out what was going on with her and what the hell she had been thinking, to convince her to defy Charlie by coming home with him, and then to help her pack.

But it was 1:39 by the time Bella finally quit stalling and entered her bedroom — three minutes before they needed to leave. And his remaining patience had long since worn thin.

He was standing at her window, staring down at the lock he'd had to break to get in. His still spasming fingers weren't quite up to anything resembling finesse, so he'd been reduced to shoving her window open with brute force, popping the lock in two. He stared at the two ruined pieces, trying to figure out just how bad it was going to be when he also had to break down her bathroom door, if his time ran out before she came to him voluntarily.

He didn't want to show her his growing anger...not when he knew how much Bella had been through, how much she was still going through.

But nonetheless, he'd now had too much time alone to think. And he was seething.

How could Bella, his mate, have done something like this to him — openly defying him and sneaking off to spend time alone with another man, one harboring deep and decidedly sexual feelings for her, feelings that she damn well knew about because Edward himself had informed her of them?

That alone would be enough to stoke his monster's possessive ire, but she had also thoroughly endangered her life in the process. Of anything she could possibly ever do to infuriate him to this level, risking her life was at the top of that list. Nothing could drive any vampire into a blind rage with his mate more quickly than that.

Then there was the matter of the risk she'd exposed him to, her mate, by forcing him to rush back for her alone, also endangering the family members he left behind and their chances for eliminating Victoria. Overall, that was a much lesser concern than his mate's safety, but still one that contributed to his wrath.

Surely she must have known this was how he would react, rushing back to reclaim her? Was she truly that desperate to see Jacob Black that she didn't care what happened to her mate when he inevitably came looking for her?

Or was it possible that she had been subconsciously trying to lure him back home, knowing he would surely come for her if she went missing? She had been worried about him going in the first place, and he knew that.

How could he read every mind on the goddamn planet except the one he most wanted to know? It was utterly maddening. Not knowing her motivations was swiftly driving him to the brink of insanity. Until he knew where Bella's head was and why she had done this, he wouldn't be able to settle.

And so his emotions, much like his imagination, were all over the place. Anger, hurt, fear, desire, pain... He was drowning in all of it, as he stood at that window.

Those particularly intense feelings still took a backseat to the predominant emotion that held him in its grip, fueled by his innate possessiveness.

Jealousy.

That one was eating him alive.

Ever since the night Bella finally told him everything Albert had done to her — the night Edward realized he didn't have to hide his true nature from his mate anymore, that she responded easily and almost instinctively to his natural dominance as a male vampire — he'd been struggling to keep the darker side of his nature in check.

Specifically, his possessive instincts.

Yes, she was undeniably his now, utterly and completely. He didn't shy away from that phrasing, nor did Bella seem to. He was just as much hers, body and soul — if he had one. They had established that fact too: everything he was or ever would be, it all belonged to her.

But thus had begun his desperate attempts to find balance for the raging emotions that feeling of possession unleashed in him, a fierce struggle between the dual sides of his nature to keep from taking his possessive urges too far.

At school, he was slowly adjusting to their new normal, finding that balance he sought. He got plenty of practice there, whether he wanted it or not. But he was already getting better at suppressing his urges to dismember her many male admirers, just for their impure thoughts about her — even Mike Newton. That was progress by any definition.

But his newfound control and balance inevitably ended right where the topic of Jacob Black began. Unlike the rest of Bella's ridiculous would-be suitors, that one represented a viable threat. Bella cared about him. How much she cared was still undetermined.

She cared enough to defy a direct instruction from her mate, obviously, and endanger her life. His teeth clenched together harder, a growl building low in his chest.

Despite his best efforts, there was still some feral part of him that just wanted to hide Bella away, keep her under lock and key, guard the door and growl mine at any fucker that dared approach.

Usually, he had a pretty tight leash on that. But on this night, he'd already been in the grip of his monster for far too many hours, throughout the entirety of Bella's visit to La Push and while Kate tortured him, further dulling his ability to think straight. So locking Bella up somewhere didn't sound quite as unseemly as usual.

You will not touch her, he sternly cautioned himself, directly addressing his monster within. Not one single finger, not when you're like this.

He flexed his fingers against the windowsill experimentally. They still didn't completely respond to his brain's commands. His manual dexterity was still shot from the after-effects of Kate's touch — even more reason to keep his hands off Bella.

That might be easier than he thought. He wasn't even completely sure that he was welcome, at the moment. That goddamn locked window gave him pause, more so than any warning he could have given himself — or that his family could give him.

He'd done battle with Rosalie at lunch in the school cafeteria that very day, in fact, about what she deemed his "progressively controlling behavior". All because he asked her to help Esme and Alice guard Bella at the Cullen house, when they were all discussing strategy in the aftermath of Alice's vision.

His sister painted a very unflattering picture of Edward's intentions. Rosalie believed that his only reason for securing Bella in their family's house, rather than in her own home where she could be more comfortable, was to ensure that his no-contact orders regarding Jacob Black were followed.

Edward couldn't even claim ignorance about where Rose got that impression. Practically the first detail out of his mouth, after all, both to his sisters and the Denalis, was an explicit instruction to prevent any such contact while he was gone.

Rosalie had informed him, in a maddeningly superior tone, that she "refused to be party to victimizing that girl any further." She would either accompany him and Emmett to dispatch Victoria, or she would take a nice vacation at a five-star resort until they returned. But she sure as hell didn't intend to be at the Cullen house, keeping Bella under lock and key, for him or anybody else. She considered it false imprisonment, whether Bella went along willingly with his madness or not. And she found it extremely tasteless, considering what Bella had already been through.

Emmett, not surprisingly, took Rosalie's side — most likely because he valued his balls, although he made a few adamant points of his own. Edward was a little surprised to see that Jasper pretty vehemently agreed with their assessment of his mental state, although Jasper didn't verbalize those thoughts. He wouldn't align himself against Alice. And Alice was squarely on Edward's side, having had a belly-full of the Jacob/Bella situation while Edward was in Brazil. Anything that prevented any more of that was just fine by her — up to and including kidnapping.

Edward accused Rosalie of being dramatic. He scoffed and snarled at her predictions that if he continued on his current path, he'd undermine his own mateship himself, without the dog having to lift a single finger.

It was absurd, to his mind. Bella knew how deep his devotion ran. She knew he wouldn't arbitrarily make demands of her without valid reasons.

So he hadn't given Rosalie's words a second thought since lunchtime.

But then he'd come up against a locked window to Bella's room when he tried to get in, and his sister's words slammed back into him with all the force of a freight train.

Someone had tried to lock him out of Bella's room. He hoped to God that that someone wasn't Bella, but he was starting to wonder.

She had to know he was there at that very moment, that he would have come back for her the very second he knew she went missing. But she certainly didn't seem eager to encounter him.

On the contrary, she was actively avoiding him, intentionally taking her time in the bathroom. And that hurt — and simultaneously scared the shit out of him.

Insecurity and fear continued seeping in alongside the jealous anger, as he stood there waiting for her to come to him. How long had she been planning this? Had she just been telling him what he wanted to hear, waiting until the first moment she was free of him to run back to Jacob Black? Was that why she'd defended the dog so passionately?

And more importantly, what the fuck had happened in La Push that night?

Could it have anything to do with the reason Bella didn't wish to see him?

The residual feeling of electric current shot through his hand again, without warning, and his fingers reflexively clenched — shattering the wood of the windowsill beneath it.

He hadn't meant to do that.

Stress, it seemed, only exacerbated that inconvenient side effect, shooting more electric impulses through his body. Uncontrollable ones.

Not one finger, he reminded his monster, as though they were wholly separate individuals. Don't you fucking touch her, no matter what.

His stomach plunged with a feeling akin to freefall when Bella finally opened her door to enter her room. Would she demand that he leave? Because he couldn't. Not when he was the only one there to protect her at the moment, having sent his family away in a fit of rage, despite his weakened state, like the goddamn egomaniac Rose accused him of being.

Bella entered the room, and he still didn't know what to say to her. He didn't know how to say it. He couldn't even decide whether he more wanted to yell at her for endangering herself, or demand to know what in God's name she had been thinking and what she was doing with Jacob Black for all those hours, or just crush her in his embrace and bask in heady relief that she was safe.

He didn't know if he'd rather fall at her feet and beg forgiveness for driving her to that point, or shove her up against her wall and try to saturate her in his scent, marking her everywhere he dared touch with his breath and his tongue, until Jacob Black or anybody else got the fucking point that she was his.

He knew which of those options his monster favored. And that was enough to lock his muscles in place right where he stood. He would not touch her, not when anger was amidst the deluge of emotions raging through him.

But the moment she was fully inside the room and he sensed her presence, though he didn't dare turn to look at her or even breathe to keep from being overcome with her sweet scent, his internal conflict ceased raging.

He knew exactly what it was that he wanted:

Her, in his arms.

He wanted to hold her close, kiss every millimeter of her beloved face, and thank every deity he'd ever heard of that she had come back to him safely. Anger melted, but his body tensed, trembling with the desire to go to her, press his lips to hers and kiss her until his every fear dissipated.

He nearly did exactly that.

And then electric aftershocks rippled up his back, and he stayed put.

Don't touch her. It wasn't his monster he was talking to anymore. Don't you fucking touch her. Don't even look at her.

The sound of her voice was nearly his undoing.

Safe...safe...safe. It was the only mantra running through his mind. Bella was safe. He had her, and he wouldn't lose her again.

But when her words registered to his still sluggish brain — Alice, I know what you're going to say — he was stunned to realize she had been expecting Alice all this time, rather than him.

He had been wrong. She didn't know exactly how deep his devotion to her ran, or she would have never doubted he'd be the one standing in that room, waiting for her and slowly losing his mind about why she wouldn't just come to him.

The remaining words they said to one another in greeting — his own sounding carefully restrained and hurt, hers defiant and defensive — were far less important than the subtext, the far more potent dialogue he heard in the charged atmosphere between them.

"What were you thinking? That's all I want to know." Why did you do this to me?

"Edward! What are you doing here?" You came back for me?

"What do you think I'm doing here, Isabella?" What do I have to do to make you understand? You're everything to me...

"I don't know. Overreacting?"

Her sarcastic, biting dig took him off guard, flared his anger all over again. Overreacting? About her risking her life?

He did more damage to her ruined windowframe, digging his nails into it. He clenched his teeth and reminded himself that harsh words would only make an already explosive situation worse.

So he held his tongue, ground his teeth together and reminded himself of everything she'd ever suffered because of him.

But then everything changed. Everything.

First, she made the mistake of moving close to him, so close he could feel her body heat.

That was dangerous enough. He contracted his muscles, willed himself to stay still.

But he was wholly unprepared for what happened when he tentatively took a breath, bracing himself for the overpowering lure of his mate's scent, something he'd denied himself since she entered the room. It should soothe him now, despite the burn. Her blood no longer tempted his monster, ever since his return from Brazil. That blood was too precious to waste by consuming. The presence of it, pumping through Bella's veins, meant she was alive. Safe.

It was absolutely crucial to his own existence, in fact.

But he didn't get the relief he expected with that inhalation. Instead, the scent of dog hit him, so strong on her body that it overpowered even the scent of Bella.

And that hit him hard.

The physical and mental torture he'd already endured was nothing compared to the moment he understood that Jacob Black had been all over his mate that night, pressed up against her, his arms around her...

His stench was all over her. It wafted from her hair, her skin, her clothes.

That was no incidental contact. Jacob had embraced her, at the very least — held her in his arms, wrapped completely around her. Tightly. His face had been buried in her hair, breathing on her — and not for one quick moment, to transfer that much of his stink. It had been extended contact.

Edward felt like he was slowly burning from the inside out. The explosion of jealousy inside him nearly drove him to his knees.

He tried closing his eyes, shallowing out his breathing to diminish the effect of that godforsaken evidence of Bella's betrayal.

Nothing worked.

He felt on the verge of losing his mind. Everything in him told him to grab her, mark her, drag his tongue up her throat and every inch of exposed skin, breathe all over her, claim her with his own scent.

That was an instinctive drive, a natural reaction to believing that one might have a rival for one's mate. If his mate was a vampire herself, she would not only expect but welcome such a reaction — because she wouldn't want the scent of another male on her body.

The primal urge was overpowering, but he couldn't succumb to it, for so many different reasons. Not least of those reasons was Bella's humanity. If she were a vampire, she would instinctively pick up on his desire to scent her. She would gladly submit, bare her neck to him, try to leave her scent on him too. It should be enjoyable for her to be so claimed.

But his mate was human, and utterly furious with him. There was little chance she'd welcome such a thing or even understand what he was trying to do. He'd likely scare her half to death, especially given her still sometimes hesitant reactions to his touch since her attack.

She had attempted to lock him out of her room, for God's sake. And he still didn't know why.

He clamped down on the blaze of desire racing through him, forced his mind back to the matter at hand.

The tense conversation that followed was little more than a blur, as he briefly and tersely explained his purpose for being there: that she was coming home with him in exactly two minutes; that he was still going after Victoria the moment he got her there safely.

He was barely hanging on. He just needed to get her outside that room, where the fresh air would diminish that damnable scent of wolf on her that he so wanted — no, needed — to erase.

His words were on autopilot; his sole focus was keeping control.

Then he noticed her eyes drop down to his side, taking in the way he still worked his fingers, subconsciously trying to regain his full use of them and regulate the residual current still flowing there. He saw the way she swallowed nervously, nearly a gulp.

And it didn't just take the edge off his mingled anger and desire. It completely deflated them.

He had frightened her, he inferred — caused her to believe he might actually put his hands on her in anger, maybe even hurt her, and that was unforgivable. He'd tear his own arms off first.

He was just about to break, to start begging her forgiveness, assuring her he would never hurt her, no matter what she'd done.

But then a new scent on the air hit him. One he hadn't smelled since before he left for Brazil.

One that, in this particular context, he most certainly hadn't expected and did nothing to help his control problem.

Arousal.

Bella was aroused. Deeply.

And it certainly had nothing to do with Jacob Black, because he knew without a doubt that scent hadn't been there a few moments before.

She was aroused by him, her mate. His anger. His jealousy. His desire to mark her. His burning passion.

She did instinctively pick up on it, without even knowing why — just like she'd responded to his dominant tone before.

God help him. If she'd been looking to throw gasoline on the raging inferno inside him at that moment, she couldn't have found a better way.

Her light touch on his arm was very nearly his undoing. He bit off the predatory growl in his chest. She was still arguing with him, he distantly knew, but the words barely registered. The room was spinning, and he had no idea if it was an after effect of Kate or if it was just her — his mate.

He tried to bark out a warning — "Don't" — but she only slid her hand sensuously down his arm and backed away, as though beckoning him. The abrupt loss of her touch, despite the scorching flame it had sent licking through his entire body, left him helpless not to follow.

She turned to put her own back against the wall. Her head tipped back against it, her throat bared as she looked up at him, her eyes dark and hooded. That bared throat almost did him in. It said she wanted him to give in to his instincts, even though he knew — knew — that she couldn't possibly understand what her body was communicating to her vampire.

His hands reached for her face. An aftershock rippled through his fingers, reminding him why he didn't dare touch her, even now, despite the overpowering nectar of her arousal raking his senses. He redirected at the last moment, flattened his palms against the wall to either side of her head.

And the scent of wolf hit him all over again.

"Don't finish that sentence, Isabella," he managed to grit out.

If she said another word right then, especially one of argument or defense of that goddamn dog, he was lost. He would be pressed up against her, his mouth at her throat, his tongue dragging up her flesh. He might not stop there.

And she would let him, he knew. The fresh flood of arousal he could smell between her legs when he caged her body in between his and the wall was enough to tell him that.

And that would be the worst possible mistake he could make right then, one minute before he intended to kidnap her and deliver her to his family to be held hostage, whether she wanted to go or not.

He focused on the calming feeling of having her right there between his arms, captive between his body and the unyielding wall, though there was no physical point of contact between them. She wasn't going anywhere. She would stay right there with him, safely within his reach. Close to him, whether he dared touch her or not.

Nothing could hurt her when he had her like that, not without getting through him. That was the calming part.

Her aroused body in close proximity and under his control, on the other hand...

God, if she weren't human and breakable...or even if she weren't traumatized and he wasn't physically compromised...if he thought for even a moment that she was thinking the exact same thing he was thinking...

But how the fuck could they possibly be on the same page, his monster snarled in his head. He must be imagining the response he wished for, because she had let another man touch her that night. A goddamn wolf. His possessive rage flared, and he bent his elbows, leaning in until he was nearly right against her.

"How am I supposed to know what you'll do if I leave you here again?" he hissed. "You knew exactly how I felt about you seeing him, and yet you sneaked off behind my back at the very first opportunity."

Bella angrily pushed her chest into his as she tried to go nose-to-nose with him, the scent of her womanhood only growing stronger. He forced himself to back off just far enough to separate their torsos, when all he really wanted to do was push forward and pin her body against that wall.

"I didn't do anything behind your back!" she yelled into his face, as angry as she was turned on. "I told you I was still going to find a way to see my friend, and that's exactly what I did!"

With God as his witness, this woman was going to be the goddamn death of him. Because she was right. She had told him that. And he had angrily shot back that he'd find a way to stop it.

Of the two of them, only Bella had kept her promise... up to that point, anyway. He was going to start keeping his, right fucking then.

"I nearly started a war tonight, Bella!" He watched her eyes as he angrily but helplessly poured out far more than he had ever meant to disclose to her about his night — trying to cross the border into La Push, Kate torturing him for hours, his utter panic until he knew Bella was safe. Perhaps he should have felt guilty for the pure horror that filled her eyes at his description of what he'd been through on her behalf. He did, to some degree. But some part of him was just overpoweringly relieved to know she actually gave a damn.

"So I truly hope tonight was worth it for you," he finished, sounding more bitter than he would really like as he reaffirmed his intentions to put a stop to her dalliances with Jacob Black. "Because it won't ever happen again."

She didn't even react to that final statement, his jealous dig about her time spent with Jacob. She was far more worried about him, somewhat mollifying him. Her hands flew up and locked around his wrists. He tightened his muscles and pushed his hands harder against the wall, willed himself to keep them there. He felt the plaster begin to give way beneath his strength.

"Edward...oh my God, you can't break the treaty! Not ever! What were you thinking?"

His jaw tightened. She clearly knew more about the treaty than he'd ever shared. That was information that must have come from Jacob, that same night. What else had the mutt told her that she really didn't need to know about?

"Aside from the fact that my mate could be hurt and I had to get to her? Nothing. I was running on pure instinct."

God, did she really and truly not know just how far he would go to keep her safe? Frustration welled up in him.

"For God's sake, Bella, how many times do I have to explain it? You are my mate! You had been gone for hours. Alice couldn't see you. For all I knew, they were holding you there to keep you away from me. What was I supposed to do?"

He felt instant remorse when he saw the guilt-stricken look on her face. The last of his anger fled, along with his jealous passion, and all there was was her.

Her soft hands released his wrists, instantly went to his face. He half expected her to strike him. Instead, she cupped his cheeks softly.

Dear God, her gentle, loving touch...it never failed to turn him completely inside out. He nearly flinched away from the overwhelming pleasure of it.

He didn't deserve it, after what he'd nearly just done.

Instead, he closed his eyes, leaning into her hands, breathing her deep. Like the smell of fresh rain permeating the air of the forest, washing away the haze of musky decay on a swelteringly humid day, Bella's own sweet scent gently cleansed the stink of wolf — of rival — from his lungs.

All he could see, smell, hear, feel, taste was her. Nothing else existed.

"I'm sorry I scared you," she whispered, and he knew she meant it. It nearly drove him to his knees. She still loved him. "You weren't even supposed to find out about it until after I was back."

That was possibly the most painful aspect of it all — her deception.

"You're safe now," he whispered. He had a soul. He knew it, in that moment, because the woman before him, not quite in his arms but close enough, was the only one capable of destroying it. "That's all that matters."

"Did it hurt?" she asked timidly. "What Kate did to you, I mean."

Maybe it was an aftershock to his brain. Maybe he was just done holding back, desperately desiring complete intimacy with his mate. But for whatever reason, the unfiltered truth came pouring out.

"Not nearly so much as what you did to me."

He regretted it the moment it was out of his mouth.

Yes, she had hurt him.

But he had just hurt her back. Her reaction was physical. She slightly bent forward, on a hard exhale, as though he'd just struck her.

He stepped fully away from her, put his hands in his pockets. He didn't know what else to do with them. The compulsion to take her in his arms and beg forgiveness for his angry words was just too strong, at the moment.

They simply didn't have time. Not if he wanted to rip Victoria into shreds.

And that wasn't optional.

"Thirty seconds left, Bella. If there's anything you want to take with you, get it now."

---

It was a strange feeling, Bella mused, being in Edward's arms and feeling such a distance between them as he ran her to their little cottage on the Cullen property — a trip he had not made optional.

He hadn't been lying about that 30-second deadline he gave her. The very moment her time was up, he picked her up and went out the window with her, without another word. She squeezed her eyes shut and buried her face in his shoulder as they fell. If not for the plunging sensation in her stomach and its abrupt cessation, she wouldn't have even known when she was falling or when they landed. He cradled her too securely, ensured that her body felt no impact.

He may have been so angry he barely wanted to speak to her at the moment, and he might be kidnapping her, but he was as gentle and careful with her as ever — maybe even more so.

He didn't try to put her on his back, either, once they were on the ground. He remained respectful to her aversion to that, an uneasiness she'd felt ever since Albert carried her away that way and then hurt her.

Edward had never once questioned her about her reasoning, but he had continued to carry her bridal style ever since she last requested it of him, remaining painstakingly careful not to jostle her as he ran.

She was grateful. She didn't care to discuss it, but she just wasn't ready to go there again yet, riding on a vampire's back. It felt too open, too exposed, like Albert or Victoria could simply snatch her off his back and take her away with very little effort. She felt far more secure with Edward holding onto her instead of the other way around, his arms snug around her, even if they were both upset with each other at the moment.

And, quite honestly, she wasn't really comfortable wrapping her legs around Edward yet, even if it was only to be perched on his back. It wasn't like she still had any physical pain remaining from her attack; but she still tensed up at the very thought of anything touching her between her legs, even non-sexually.

Just...not yet. Maybe one day.

Maybe one day soon, even. It wasn't like she hadn't thought about ways of working through her frustrating hangups.

It wasn't like she hadn't wondered if Edward would be willing to relax his boundaries and help her overcome them.

It wasn't like she hadn't blushed furiously and pushed that thought from her mind, certain she would never find the guts to ask him such a thing.

Maybe she would, one day. But not yet.

She peeked up, trying not to be noticed, and watched his face as he ran. She tried to suppress thoughts of what it would be like to let him touch her that way, because she just felt guilty thinking about that when he likely didn't even want her that way anymore.

Especially now, after what she had done.

The brunt of his anger with her, at least, had visibly melted away while they were still in her room, the moment she tentatively stroked his face and told him how sorry she was for hurting him.

But now, he had become quiet and withdrawn. Though he surely sensed her perusal of him, he didn't so much as glance down at her as he ran, nor did he speak to her. Something was eating at him, and she could only assume he was still angry and hurt about her going to see Jacob behind his back, not to mention what he had been through because of it. What else could it be?

Left to her own thoughts, equally as quiet and subdued as Edward, Bella let the fresh air soothe the remainder of her own turbulent emotions. She felt some strange mixture of feelings: anger over being bossed around and kidnapped yet again; guilt for undeniably having forced Edward's hand and driving him to this, at least to some extent; and even some embarrassment over her body's traitorous reactions to her mate's tightly restrained fury with her in her room...reactions that it was highly unlikely had escaped his notice.

He had surely known exactly how aroused she was, when he caged her in against her wall, holding his weight off of her with those strong arms as he bent his elbows and leaned in a little closer to her...

For one brief moment, she'd thought he was about to crash his lips into hers, press her up against that wall, and fulfill a few of her most secret fantasies about him losing his grip on that steely control.

And that was a little mortifying. What must he have thought of her, reacting that way? Having his way with her was almost certainly the very last thing that had been on his mind. He was furious with her, for God's sake. And she likely wouldn't have been able to carry through anyway.

He wasn't even touching her with his fingers as they ran, she noticed now — which, to be perfectly honest, she was a little hurt by. Was he really that angry that he could barely stand to touch her? He had one wrist beneath her knees, the heel of his hand supporting her back, but he kept his fingers carefully flexed away from her.

Her heart sank. Had she done permanent damage to her relationship with Edward?

---

Despite her growing concerns that she may not be so easily forgiven as she hoped, she still shrunk a little deeper into Edward's embrace when they came into the clearing near the cottage and she saw the group of vampires waiting for them outside, every one of them staring at her.

The only two she recognized were Esme and Alice. Her jaw dropped open when she saw the rest of them. If Edward noticed the fact that she was having a miniature meltdown, he didn't react to it. He just set her on her feet on the walkway outside the little house and put a gentlemanly hand on the small of her back — standing a little farther away from her than usual, and still avoiding touching her with his fingers.

"Bella, allow me to introduce the rest of our family," he started the introductions formally. "This is Eleazar and Carmen, Kate, Tanya, and Irina." He turned his focus toward the Denalis. "I'd like you all to meet my mate, Bella Swan."

If one thing was abundantly clear, it was that she hadn't exactly made a great first impression. Not one of them seemed particularly impressed with her, and she didn't really need to ask why. They had come all the way from Alaska to guard her, only for her to impulsively take off to La Push.

There were a couple of polite hellos, several disapproving looks. Mostly, they all just stared, leaving her fidgeting. Their reservations likely had far less to do with her being human than with the events of the evening, so she couldn't even blame it on some type of bias against humans. She would have stressed out over that more, but she just couldn't stop staring right back at the three gorgeous blondes with golden eyes.

She held onto the fact that Edward had introduced the Denalis as "our family" — his intonation clear that he meant his and hers. He wasn't so angry that he was planning to get rid of her, evidently. Although why he would ever have chosen her in the first place, when the blonde perfection triplets were standing five feet away and the one in the middle was looking him up and down like a tasty snack, she wasn't really sure.

The first thing she was going to learn to do when she was changed was growl. She was going to need it when any female looked at Edward the way that one was.

"It's nice to meet you all," she managed, hating the fact that her voice was shaking. Edward definitely heard it. His hand at her back inched a little further around her, his fingers finally touching her for the first time that night when they curled around her waist in support. He inched just the tiniest bit closer to her, and her heart felt like it was going to explode. Despite whatever was going on between them, whether she had hurt him or not, he still had her back.

"Edward, it's time." That was Alice. "You're already going to be cutting it close. I still can't nail down exactly how it ends, doing it this way. This new plan is risky."

Bella instantly forgot all of the judgmental faces around her. She looked up at Edward, fear flooding her.

"Then don't go," she begged impulsively, turning her back on them all to face Edward and grip his shirt. He kept his hand lightly at her waist but didn't touch her in any other way. "Call it off. You didn't even get a chance to hunt yet."

She didn't hear the entire statement muttered behind her, nor could she tell who it came from. She did hear the words "guess whose fault" pretty clearly, and she could extrapolate the rest. Edward's hand at her waist tightened. He looked over her head, in the direction of the three blondes.

"I don't want there to be any more of that," he said quietly but firmly. "She had no way of knowing what would happen tonight or what could have happened. She doesn't completely understand our world yet, but she is my mate. I realize you are all only being loyal to me, but I won't tolerate it at Bella's expense."

Most of them nodded or looked down, accepting his words. The blonde in the middle, the one whose way of looking at Edward had immediately rubbed Bella the wrong way, gave a bitter snarl. So obviously, she was the one who said it. And she didn't much care for Edward taking Bella's side over hers, calling her down.

"I'm going to check the perimeter," she stated coldly. And with one last glare at Bella, she turned around and disappeared into the woods. Edward winced, probably at whatever thoughts he heard in the woman's mind, Bella assumed.

"I do need to go, love," he told Bella, turning his focus back to her like she was the only one there. "Carlisle suggested we continue into Seattle after we're done with Victoria, and I think it's a good idea. While the Denalis are here to help protect you, it's the perfect time to gather information on the rest of Victoria's army. It will be late tomorrow night before we return, at the earliest."

Bella really didn't want to burst into tears in front of a group of overtly hostile strangers. But she was about to anyway. She was trapped until at least the next night, and not in friendly company. Out of the entire group of her vampire guards, the only one who didn't look like she wanted to wring Bella's neck was Esme. Until Edward's words in Bella's defense, even Alice had been glaring at her with open hostility.

"They're not going to let me leave or call Charlie until you're back, are they?" It was a pointless question. She already knew the answer.

Edward sighed, looking uncomfortable. "I'm sorry it has to be this way. I hope you won't take it out on Alice and Esme. This was my decision and they're only going along with my wishes, albeit reluctantly. But no, Bella. They won't allow you to leave."

Esme stepped forward and put her hand on Bella's shoulder, kind as always. "I still don't believe anything like that will be necessary anyway. Come, dear. Let's get you inside so you can get some rest. It's very late, and you must be tired."

Edward tried to smile for Bella's sake when her eyes flew back to his face in a panic, but it was strained. "I'll see you tomorrow night," he declared, his words a promise.

He leaned forward, brushed his lips across her forehead, pulled back for one last look...

Then he hesitated, seemed to struggle with himself before making some decision. He dropped his voice low, though it wouldn't do much to keep anyone else from hearing. "Bella...about what happened tonight, in your room...I would never..."

"Edward!" cried out an exasperated Alice. "Are you trying to get yourself killed? If you're going, you have to leave now."

He sighed in frustration, briefly closing his eyes and nodding his head. When he looked at Bella again, his eyes were apologetic. "Whatever you may think of me right now, I do love you, more than you can imagine. Please try to remember that."

And then he was gone, already out of sight before she could even begin to form a reply — or wonder what, exactly, he had been attempting to apologize for. Kidnapping her? Or something else entirely?

---

After Edward admonished the group on Bella's behalf, Alice started to at least make an effort. She stopped openly glaring. She even came up on Bella's other side as Esme walked her to the door and into the cottage, offered her a half-hearted smile.

"Don't freak out, okay?" Alice said, just before Esme opened the door. "I told him he shouldn't have done this."

Bella didn't have long to wonder what Alice was talking about. She figured it out two steps into the living room, when she froze in place, staring.

The couch had been pushed up against the far wall, along with the other furniture. Along the interior wall that adjoined the kitchen, there now stood a gigantic bed, black wrought iron, decked out with a beautiful gold bedspread and fluffy, soft-looking pillows.

"What's this?" she asked, despite the obviousness of the answer. If she sounded more than a little horrified, it was because she already knew the answer.

Edward had got her a big, expensive bed.

A kidnap bed.

Alice was right. He really shouldn't have.

Did this mean he was never letting her go back to Charlie's house? Was this a permanent kidnapping? Would the entire Cullen family have to leave town now, taking her with them? She and Edward hadn't really covered a whole lot of details during their argument, when she'd been thinking with her dazzled libido instead of her brain. But now, she had some questions.

"It's for you," Alice told her like she was stupid, her earlier annoyance seeping back in. "To sleep on."

"You didn't think he'd let you sleep on the couch, did you?" Esme stepped in with a smile, trying to soothe the tension in the room. "He couldn't bear the thought of you spending another night on the futon, either. He's far too much of a gentleman for that."

Bella couldn't stop staring at it. "But how..."

"He bought it today, over the phone, while you were in gym," Alice explained, foreseeing her question. "He told you he had a lot of calls to make. This was one of them."

Alice was definitely still feeling defensive of her brother. Her tone was a bit snippy.

Esme again jumped in to clarify, far more civilly.

"Originally, we set it up in his room, up at the main house. That's where you were going to stay, before Charlie decided not to let you come over with Alice. Edward asked us to move it down here for you when he decided to bring you here. We set it up while he was gone to pick you up."

Picking her up. Interesting choice of words for kidnapping. She definitely hadn't had a choice in the matter. Edward would have brought her to this cottage tonight, whether she was willing or not.

Leaving still wasn't an option, either, even now that he was gone. Alice's body language was fairly easy to read. If she ran, Alice would probably take great pleasure in tackling her...if she didn't trip over her own two feet first.

Even if she made it past Alice, she'd then have to get through the Denalis, who really didn't like her. Maybe she was spinning out of control a little bit, making some self-destructive and impulsive decisions, but she hadn't completely lost her mind.

Again, she felt completely conflicted. She still wanted to be furious at Edward for forbidding her to see Jacob, for overreacting and rushing home the way he had, for trying to cross the Quileute border like a fool, and for being so pissed at her for something as simple as a brief visit to La Push, not to mention kidnapping her and employing his family as prison guards.

On the other hand, she couldn't miss the hurt in his eyes when she first came home, even in the midst of his fury. Whether or not she fully understood or even agreed with the reasons for it didn't matter. She had hurt him. Deeply.

Not nearly so much as what you did to me, he had said, when she asked if Kate's electric touch had been painful.

Guilt stabbed at her heart, threatened to override her righteous anger.

That bed, even if it did upset her, was just him trying as hard as he could to ensure not only her safety during his absence, but her comfort as well.

He'd been willing to run straight into near certain death in La Push to find her, all because, whether rightly or wrongly, he truly believed her to be in danger from the wolves.

And even after all that, when he was so angry he could barely look at her, he'd still asked his family to bring the bed down to the cottage for her, so that she would at least be comfortable.

He'd also defended her to his family and extended family outside, despite the indefensibility, to their way of thinking, of what she had done. Maybe Edward was right that she didn't fully understand their world, but she could pick up enough from the looks on every single face outside that cottage, when she and Edward first arrived, to know that what she had done was tantamount to infidelity in their eyes.

Which meant Edward likely saw it that way too, she realized suddenly. Which would have explained that look on his face in her room, some painful mixture of love, hurt, and fury.

God, she'd worn Jacob's coat all night, as they walked on the beach. Could Edward smell Jacob on her, especially after that overtight, overly proprietary hug Jacob had ambushed her with, right before she left? Her heart sank.

Of course he could.

She needed to talk to Edward. She needed to talk to him right then.

As Esme excused herself to the kitchen to make Bella some hot tea before bed, leaving her alone with Alice, Bella's eyes turned back toward the huge bed, her heart still thudding with panic over the thought that Edward might believe she had been unfaithful to him.

The bed was in the living room, not the bedroom. She had no doubt that was at Edward's instruction too, and that if she walked to the master bedroom at that moment, it would still be empty. He'd kept his promise not to put anything in there until she chose.

How could he be so sweet and accommodating in some areas, and so rigid and controlling in others?

She turned and looked right at Alice, with tears brimming in her eyes.

"How did he get it delivered so fast?" she asked, her voice small. It was just easier to focus on small, insignificant details. If she looked at the big picture at the moment, she'd fall apart. "You said he just ordered it today?"

Alice's eyes softened at that question, a tiny smile touching her lips.

"Once you're one of us, you'll find that there's very little that can't be made to happen for the right amount of money. And Edward would spend his last penny to make this as easy for you as he can."

Like a pendulum swinging in the opposite direction, guilt disappeared and rebellion pushed up in Bella again. Why was Alice so determined to defend him, instead of just answering a simple question? Bella was Alice's best friend, by Alice's own definition, and Bella was being held captive. Didn't Alice care at all about that? Call it what you will, but this beautiful little cottage she'd come to love and associate with safety and feeling loved was now nothing more than a gilded cage — and the bed right along with it.

She couldn't leave. She knew better than to even ask if she could call Charlie or anyone else...especially Jacob. And it was making her claustrophobic.

It was all a little too similar, all of a sudden, to that night she'd spent locked into Lacey's cabin with Albert. The feeling of being similarly trapped in another little cottage nearly took her breath away, to the point that she had to fight down the panic. She won that battle, but only by sniping at Alice.

"Make what easy for me?" she snapped, bristling. "Being a prisoner?"

Alice looked annoyed. "He really does just want the best for you, Bella."

"What he thinks is best."

Alice sighed. "I wish you could see it. I wish you could see what he used to be like before he met you, how different he is with you. Be patient with him. This is all new to him too. He's learning. He's not going to get it all right, but he's trying. At least give him a chance to explain it all to you when he cools down."

"Can you explain it?" she retorted. "Because it looks like I have plenty of time and nowhere to be." Okay, that one was pushing it, and Bella knew it. Alice's face grew angry again.

"Would you stop? He just needs to know you're safe, even while he's gone. Especially while he's gone. You disappearing when he wasn't here? If you really want to know, that was probably the cruelest thing you could have done to him. It's his deepest fear. And I know hurting him wasn't your intention. I know that. But how can you not see that ever since he got you back, he's scared to let you out of his sight? He's completely terrified of something happening to you. That's really what this is all about. I promise you, if I thought his motivations were anything beyond that, I'd kick his ass for you. We all would, probably even the Denalis...well, most of them."

Bella cringed at that reminder. None of the Alaskan vampires had followed them inside, opting to protect the cottage from outside. But she had the feeling they could all probably hear this conversation.

Focusing on them was still less painful than really considering Alice's words about the pain she'd caused Edward that night.

"I'm pretty sure they all hate me anyway," she whispered. And Alice rolled her eyes.

"Whispering won't help. You're going to have to get used to the idea there are no secrets in this family. That includes the Denalis, which is why I'm telling you this now, right in front of them. Nobody hates you. They don't understand what you did, but when they see how happy you make Edward, they'll accept you."

Bella licked her lips, debating whether now was the best time to ask the question burning her from the inside out, or if she should wait until after Edward was back and the Denalis went back to Alaska. But then, when would she ever get the chance to ask without Edward hearing?

No secrets, Alice had said. So she decided to go for it. It wasn't like she could possibly make things worse, at this point.

"The one who went to check the perimeter when we were outside..." she trailed off, and Alice nodded, with a tiny smile pulling at her lips, because for God's sake, it was Alice. She likely already knew where this conversation was going.

"You mean Tanya."

"She really doesn't like me. And...and I got the impression that maybe..." And she lost her nerve right there. She wasn't sure she wanted to know anymore. But it was a little late already, because Alice could see the damn future and knew exactly what she wanted to know.

"The answer to your question is yes. She's expressed an interest in him in the past. A few times, actually."

Okay, so Bella had been wrong. She could make it worse, at least for herself. It felt like the world had just tilted over and tried to dump her off. Edward, being the object of desire of that blonde goddess outside — the thought was unbearable. She could barely breathe.

"Oh." She actually thought she might throw up all over Alice's stylish shoes. That ought to really cement the Denalis' opinion of her. "I mean, who could blame him?" she stammered, reeling, willing herself not to cry. "She's completely gorgeous. Just like all of you are. But I mean, she's, like, really, really..."

"Oh, Bella, for the love of God!" Alice grabbed her by the shoulders, and for just a second, Bella thought she was going to shake her. "Do you hear yourself right now? Or did you at least hear Edward out there? Because he made his priorities crystal clear, in case you weren't paying attention. I said she expressed an interest in him. He didn't return it. He turned her down. Repeatedly, in fact. He's never expressed an interest in anybody until the day he met you. He's been completely yours ever since, even before he realized it for himself. And he would never, never give you reason to doubt that."

It was pure guilt that made Bella react the way she did. She knew that. Alice knew it. Probably even pretty, pretty Tanya out in the woods knew it and was gloating over it.

But halfway through, Bella's guilt-soaked, angry retort turned into something else entirely — something she hadn't even realized she harbored deep within.

"You don't think I doubted it when he left me for seven months, without explanation, and not one of you would tell me where he was?" she yelled back. "Not one of you just told me the truth, and I hated you for it! Or is your point that I'm the one giving him reason to doubt my feelings, just because I went to visit my friend? My friend, Alice. A real one, who's actually on my side! Jake saved my life when Edward was gone, just by being there for me!"

Alice hadn't seen that one coming. She stood there, stunned. "Bella..."

But it was all coming out now, and Bella couldn't stop it. She'd pushed down her emotions far too often and for far too long since her attack, living in the Cullen house and trying to be the perfect houseguest — while being watched at every moment. And then she'd had to go home and pretend to be perfectly normal around Charlie, who had obviously not been so completely fooled by her performance as she believed. He'd known something was wrong with her, he'd said earlier.

All those aggressive verbal outbursts she'd been having, the ones that had confused and frightened her, along with her irrational, impulsive decision-making?

Those were just pressure cracks in the dam.

Now the whole thing was in collapse, releasing the torrent of pain and anger inside.

"No!" she cut Alice off. "I love Edward, and I love all of you, but that doesn't give any of you the right to tell me what I can and can't do! If even one of you had just treated me like an adult and told me the truth from the beginning, maybe we wouldn't be here now! Maybe I would just be normal and not jump out of my skin every time somebody touches me, even Edward! Especially Edward. Maybe I wouldn't have nightmares, and panic attacks, and...and fucking flashbacks with his face in them, because maybe none of this would have ever happened to me at all!"

And there it was. All the venom she'd been keeping inside, festering until it nearly drove her out of her mind, was now spewing out of her at the top of her lungs, complete with vulgar language that would make Edward cringe. And maybe that was part of the fucking point.

She hadn't even realized how much anger she'd been holding onto with all of the Cullens. She certainly hadn't consciously realized she blamed them for her attack, deep down.

And now it was out there for everyone to know exactly how she felt.

No secrets. Alice was right about that much. She had none left.

She had nothing left. She couldn't even cry. She just stood there, waiting for the rest of her world to fall apart when they inevitably shunned her, abandoned her, disappeared out of her life all over again. Surely not even Edward would blame them. He'd be gone too.

But Esme reappeared in the room during Bella's tirade, her expression stricken, cradling a cup of steaming hot tea in her hands. She cut a stunned Alice off before she could reply, blurring over to Bella's side the moment she was finished.

"Alice, no more," Esme said, as stern as Bella had ever heard.

Bella felt like she was about to hyperventilate. What had she done? She turned panicked eyes on Esme, her head shaking no in denial.

"Esme, I'm...I didn't mean...I would never..." She couldn't even get out a full sentence, one thought tripping over the next in her horror.

They would all hate her now. How could she ever be part of this family, be part of Edward's life with them, after saying such horrible things?

But Esme put a hand on her shoulder, looked her right in the eyes.

"You never have to apologize to us for your feelings. Edward himself knows he bears part of the blame for what happened to you, as do Carlisle and I. All of us failed you, in one way or another. I could have come to you during his absence, and I didn't, despite the fact that you've been my daughter since the moment I first saw you. I regret that every single day. You've said nothing to be ashamed of, sweetheart."

While Bella reeled, Esme's focus turned toward Alice. "Now, unless Bella wishes to talk more about this tonight, you and I are going to leave her alone to get some rest. She's been through a lot, and it's late. I'm sure she's very tired. It might be for the best to discuss things after she's had some rest."

A few seconds before, she'd have likely pointed out that being tired was the least of her problems, but she just couldn't bring herself to snipe at Esme. She just took the cup when Esme offered it, mumbling a thank you. Then she walked over to the couch beside the wall, grabbed the soft throw blanket draped across the back of it, and then made a beeline for that bear-skin rug in front of the fireplace and lowered herself to sit on it.

She didn't go within five feet of that gorgeous, imposing kidnap bed. She didn't even look at it. Her entire body was shaking.

Alice sighed, audibly. "So I take it you're sleeping on the floor, then." She sounded utterly dejected.

"No, I'm sleeping on the rug. It's soft."

Yes, Bella knew she sounded like a three-year-old. No, she didn't really care at the moment. She honestly just needed every single one of the Cullens out of her face for, like, five minutes so she could have a chance to pull herself together.

She hadn't been truly alone since the moment Albert took her, aside from showering and using the bathroom. And she needed to have a really, really good meltdown over all the awful events of that day— hurting Charlie again, leading Jacob on, finding herself a vampire's prisoner again, arguing with Alice, finding out that the absolutely gorgeous creature outside wanted to steal her mate. How could she ever compete with that?

Even the completely confusing interlude with Edward earlier, in her bedroom, had left her shaken. She wasn't ready to further examine either of their behavior — his white-hot fury and aggressiveness, or her own primal, sexual reaction to it. She almost felt ashamed, and she was probably going to cry about that too. Because even if she had succeeded in provoking Edward into starting something, she'd have likely freaked out before they could finish it.

But above all, she needed to cry about the fact that she had hurt Edward. Because she knew she had, on the very night he was going out to face Victoria to defend her, and that was the worst part of it all.

"Couldn't you at least sleep on the couch?" Alice asked, a bit timidly now. "I mean, can't you guess what he's going to say about this when he finds out? Or would you like me to just tell you?"

That was half of the damn point. So Bella just took a sip of the bland tea, willed herself to keep calm and not start screaming again. "Let me guess. He forbids it." Her voice was icy cold.

"Alice." Esme cautioned, a tone of warning in her voice. "Leave her alone." Bella didn't even look up from her cup to see what prompted that warning.

"Fine," Alice conceded primly. "But I'm at least going to build her a fire first. He's going to be mad enough that we let her sleep on the floor, without letting her freeze to death too."

It was probably Esme who dragged Alice out of the room after she was done building a roaring fire in the fireplace, one that Bella had to admit was soothing and warm. But it didn't really matter how it happened.

All she knew was that she was finally, finally alone for a few blessed, peaceful minutes, and she could bury her face in her arms and cry herself to sleep at her heart's content.

They were huge, hot, cathartic tears. And they were draining the rage right out of her. The more she cried, the less angry she felt.

She didn't even worry about all of the vampires who could hear the entire thing — including the Denalis, who, if they had hated her before, must surely hate her all the more now.

But by the very definition of spinning out of control, she just couldn't stop.

---

Four minutes. Edward was four minutes from the new interception point.

Four minutes until he would crash directly into a fleeing Victoria, being pushed in his direction by his family.

Victoria may not have been the one Edward wanted most — not by a long shot. Albert Rowe, the goddamn rapist who'd molested and digitally violated Edward's mate, held that distinction.

But Victoria would be a nice start.

And that wouldn't be the end of it. No. She would give him the others. She would give him Riley and the shield, Thomas. She would give him her whole damn army.

She would give him Albert. Or he would make her wish she had.

He pushed his speed a little faster, a snarl breaking free. It was going to be close. He was barely going to make it in time to plant himself directly in Victoria's path as his family approached from the opposite direction, forcing her to slam headlong into him.

It wasn't the original plan. No, it was a hell of a lot riskier than that, as Alice had made sure to point out in his head — loudly and repeatedly.

The original plan had been to surround the location Alice saw Victoria passing through, and simply set upon her from all sides.

But that plan effectively went down the tubes the moment he started running back for Forks when Alice called.

Edward had been the key to that particular plan, and they all knew it. Even with their ambush, Victoria, with her uncanny skills for evasion, would break free. When that inevitably happened, he was the only one who could anticipate her movements through her thoughts, and he was also the only one fast enough to actually catch her. His family could pursue and herd her down the path they wanted her to take, eventually managing to force her into a straightaway. But even then, it would be only Edward's speed that could overtake her and bring her down.

That was the exact sequence of events Alice had seen in the cafeteria, and it was solid.

Their chances weren't as good now. Alice made sure he understood that, too, that there were multiple outcomes to their new plan, not all of them positive. He was taking a risk doing it this way.

The new, revised plan was simple: after his detour to retrieve Bella, there was no possible way he could be at the original ambush location in time. But Emmett, Jasper, Carlisle, and Rosalie were still going to meet Victoria there, making themselves known.

They were going to make sure that when she ran, she ran directly toward Forks — and toward Edward, who was on his way back alone.

So it was a backup plan at best, and a risky one at that. Especially when he had only hunted once since he returned from Brazil, where he had starved himself for months.

But if it went according to plan, she'd run headlong into him like a freight train, unable to turn back or to the side because of his family behind her.

She would have nowhere else to go.

It would work. It had to, mostly because he desperately needed the chance to make things right with Bella. If this was a trap...if they had been set up, and the entire army of newborns was waiting somewhere for him in these woods, shielded so he couldn't hear them...

Then he couldn't bear the thought that Bella's last memory of him would be his fierce demeanor in her bedroom, his accusatory words, his kidnapping her and leaving her a captive to his family in her own little cottage.

That was not the way he wanted to die, with guilt on his conscience and his mate angry with him.

That was not the way he was going to die.

---

Vampires don't black out. Or at least they shouldn't.

They don't have out-of-body experiences or memory lapses.

But when he caught Victoria's scent, rapidly coming closer, Edward went so deep that conscious thought wasn't a possibility. Everything slowed down. His vision tunneled in on what was directly before him.

He wouldn't even remember those last few moments between catching her scent and his headlong collision with Victoria. He only remembered ducking his head down just before impact, when he narrowly caught her intention to clothesline him.

She had nowhere else to go but straight into him — his family was making sure of that.

At the last possible moment, he ducked under her arm, driving his shoulder straight into her stomach.

They were both at full speed at the moment of impact. The sound of their collision would have been deafening to a human. But he barely noticed it. He was too focused.

Victoria was an escape artist. Despite how drastically she was outnumbered, she was still confident in her ability to evade them all and escape.

And he couldn't allow that.

He locked down his muscles, his feet grabbing for purchase as he braced them hard against the ground to keep from being the one pushed backward. He won that particular battle, grasping onto Victoria's shoulders to keep her from escaping as their feet slid across the ground in the same direction he had been traveling, leaving a deep, furrowed rut in the ground.

He twisted, managed to get his arms around her neck, to secure the grip he would need to remove her head from her shoulders.

He could take his time with Albert later. With Victoria, he was taking no chances. One question was all he had for her, and then he would finish it.

But his compromised fingers seized, his grip not locking as securely as it should.

And with one evasive maneuver, Victoria capitalized on that brief moment of weakness and twisted free of his grasp. She kicked him in the stomach and sent him flying before he regained control. Immediately, she launched herself into the nearest tree, landing back on a path that took her away from the rest of the Cullens as she ran a zig-zag pattern — headed in the direction of Canada.

Edward's family, who had been not far behind Victoria, dashed past him.

"Go back to plan A!" Jasper shouted as they passed, ignoring the burst of profanity streaming out of Edward's lips. "We'll keep her on the path! You run her down!"

Growling and snarling, his eyes pitch-black with murder, Edward took off after them.

He urged every ounce of speed he could from his unsteady legs. He could not give up. He wouldn't.

Emmett and Jasper were flanking Victoria, as close as they could stay to her. Rosalie and Carlisle widened their perimeter out, slightly ahead of the others, pressuring Victoria to keep going in roughly the same direction.

She made it farther than she should have. She made it farther than she would have, if Edward had been at full capacity. They were close to Canada by the time the rugged terrain began to work to their advantage, funneling Victoria into an even more enclosed path, one that didn't allow the twists and turns she had relied on so far to maintain her distance.

They chased her into a dense stand of trees, finally, with only the narrowest path through it. Victoria was forced into a straightaway.

It was now or never.

Yelling at the top of his lungs as he pushed himself harder than he ever had before, Edward put everything he had into one last, final burst of speed.

He was gaining ground.

When he launched himself into the air, he knew it was his last chance. If he missed, if he had gauged the distance or velocity wrong in the slightest degree, Victoria would escape. He wouldn't be able to catch up to her again — not when he could barely feel his spasming legs; not when the more he used his muscles, the more they conducted the remains of Kate's power through his body, working to expel it.

He hit her square in the back, and they both went down, rolling and tumbling, grasping at each other, trying to gain the upper hand.

He saw it in her mind, the moment Victoria realized she was lost — before he even truly realized it himself.

He was going to win. His family had just caught up to them, surrounding them in an ever-tightening circle.

Not even Victoria could get away now.

She snarled and spat, kicking backward at him as he rose to his knees with his arms locked around her neck from behind, pulling her backward and off balance. He could see each struggle form in her mind before she made it, and he compensated with very little effort, moving with her.

It was over.

"Where is he?" Edward growled, laser-focused on the most minuscule detail he could pull from Victoria's mind. "Where is Albert Rowe hiding? Tell me and I'll make it quick."

Victoria lurched, but he held on. She blanked her mind, tried to keep from giving anything away.

But it was too late. At the moment of Edward's question, her first thought was of a location — a deserted shack, 15 miles outside Forks.

Edward chuckled, low and mirthlessly — a deadly sound of utter satisfaction, meant to let his enemy know she was beaten. "That's all I needed. Goodbye, Victoria."

"The girl's still going to die," the redhead snarled desperately, clawing at Edward's hands where they were clasped together around her throat, his left hand gripping his right wrist just below her ear. "It's already in motion. You can't stop it!"

He only secured his grip tighter, preparing to remove her head from her shoulders. The fury that flowed through him was stronger than any electric current that might impair him now.

"Watch me," he spat. And he began to squeeze.

Victoria whimpered, knowing death was imminent. "He was my mate!" she howled mournfully, as though the death of James could in any way justify hurting the sweet, innocent girl Edward loved with his entire being.

He grit his teeth, widened his stance and braced himself.

"And she's mine," he hissed in Victoria's ear.

And then, with one savage twist and pull of his arms, it was done.

TO BE CONTINUED...