Emma found herself tossing and turning that night, unable to sleep. She eventually decided to go downstairs to make herself a tea, hoping it would calm her thoughts. As she made her way down the staircase she soon realized that she was not the only one still awake. As she reached the doorway to the sitting room, she saw Regina curled up on the sofa by the fireplace. She had her legs tucked underneath her and she was wrapped in a soft looking maroon blanket as she stared into the flames.
"Hey." Emma said quietly, hoping not to startle her.
When Regina looked back at her, Emma was saddened to see the tear stains and redness around the other woman's eyes. The brunette didn't say anything. She just gave Emma a self-conscious half smile and turned away again, wiping a few tears away with a tissue.
"Are you alright?" Emma asked softly, taking a few tentative steps into the room.
Regina nodded, pulling the blanket more securely around her shoulders.
"You can't sleep?" Regina asked, her voice a little raw.
"Nope. Guess I should have passed on that third coffee huh?" Emma grinned as she sat down beside the brunette.
Regina gave a small smile as she shifted her position so she could face Emma.
"Not to mention the fact that I'm still a little freaked out. It's hard learning that not only are my best friends actually my parents, but also that I am a princess, and not just any princess, the daughter of Snow White and Prince Charming, and my son is also the son of the Evil Queen and she cast a curse to seek revenge on my mother and now that same queen wants my help to break the curse. Oh and did I mention that at the moment, my parents don't know who they are so I have to get my best friends to believe they are each other's true loves so they will be able to remember that they are actually my parents?"
Regina gave a soft laugh. "Yes I would imagine that would take some time to come to terms with."
Emma's eyes softened at the sound. "You know I think that's the first time I've ever heard you laugh."
Regina's smile grew, her gaze wandered to the fireplace again. "It has been some time." She said softly.
"Well you should laugh more often, you have a nice laugh. And you know what they say, laughter is the best medicine." Emma settled a little more comfortably into the couch.
Regina chose not to respond, instead she folded her arms across her waist and watched as the flames danced in the fireplace.
"You know what I find crazy though?" Emma asked.
Regina raised an eyebrow.
"You're Henry's mom, but you're also my mom's mom in a way. But I'm Henry's mom too. So what the hell does that make you to me?"
Regina smiled down at her clasped hands. "Your step-grandmother dear. But I'll ask you not to tell that to too many people. I don't feel old enough to be a grandmother."
"Grandmother." Emma mouthed, letting the word sink in. "I have a grandmother. And she's you."
Regina folded her arms. "I've never really thought about it like that until now."
"This is ridiculous, do you know how crazy this is? Please tell me this is all in my head. I'm hallucinating, or I'm dreaming right? This is so far beyond crazy."
"I assure you this is all completely real Miss Swan."
Emma sighed, folding her arms as she thought. "On that note, do you feel like you've lived for like twenty-eight extra years? Or does the curse kind of work on you too in that way?"
Regina shifted uncomfortably. "It feels like it's been that long but it also feels like the time's flown by. If that makes any sense."
"Sounds like life."
The mayor nodded thoughtfully. "Yes I suppose you're right. So I guess for me, living under the curse has been more or less normal."
"Except for the fact that you haven't aged in thirty years. That's pretty cool."
Regina gave a tired sigh, not wanting to explain to Emma that living longer and never aging may sound like a dream come true, but if you spend most of that life alone then what's the point?
Emma studied the brunette for a few moments. "So why are you still up? Are the sleeping pills not helping tonight?"
"I wouldn't know, I didn't take any."
"Why not?" Emma asked softly.
"I just... I wanted some time to think."
"Oh... Would you prefer to be alone then?"
"It doesn't matter to me." Regina said with the ghost of a smile. "You can stay if you want to."
Emma sighed internally, never knowing what to do with those kinds of answers. "I was just coming down to make some tea, do you want some?"
"Oh I can get that for you. You're a guest, you shouldn't have to–" Regina made to get up.
Emma held up her hand to stop her. "Don't worry about it. I'm imposing on you enough by being here. Making a tea for you is the least I can do."
Regina settled back into her seat. "It's not an imposition. We both know it's better that you're here." Her gaze dropped to the floor, as if she was ashamed of admitting it.
Emma bit her lip uncomfortably, not knowing how to respond to that. "I'll be right back."
Ten minutes later the two women were seated comfortably by the fire. Regina's tea was sitting on the table beside her, and her arms were wrapped around her waist as she continued to stare into the flames. Emma was holding her mug in both hands, sitting cross-legged on the sofa beside the mayor.
After a few minutes of silence Emma shot a glance at Regina. "You know, it's funny isn't it? Ever since we've known each other we've been at each other's throats. Now here we are, I'm staying in your spare room, we took a road trip together and now we're sitting here in the middle of the night, in our pajamas drinking tea together. I don't think anyone saw that coming."
Regina didn't respond. Her eyes wandered in thought at Emma's words but she didn't meet Emma's gaze. Emma's smile faded as she stared at the unresponsive brunette.
"I misjudged you." Regina finally replied quietly.
"About what?"
"I can see how much you and Henry care about each other. And now seeing how well the two of us can get along makes me realize that all the time I spent trying to keep you two apart, I should have been trying to make things work between the three of us."
"What do you mean 'make things work'?" Emma's brow furrowed.
"I mean, if we'd have just been... civil... maybe things wouldn't have turned out the way they did. It would have prevented a lot of suffering."
"I tried to be civil. You're the one who went into war-mode from the start."
"I know." Regina responded quietly. "Most of it was my fault. I do accept that."
"I don't know why you thought you had to be so, I dunno, vicious towards me. Because in reality the more you tried to drive me away the more I wanted to stay. I thought you were the reason why Henry was so unhappy and I thought I needed to get him away from you. If you could have just told me how you really felt, things would have been different. If I'd known how scared you really were I would have gone about things differently. You could have just told me the truth." Emma ended softly.
"What truth?"
"Do you remember the very first night we met?"
"Of course I do."
"Well when I dropped off Henry I had no intention of staying. When I was leaving I planned on never coming back. I could see that something was troubling Henry but I could also see that he came from a good home. My first impression was that you cared very much about him. It was after; when you told me that I was not welcome in his life, when you threatened me and reminded me that I had no right to him, I could sense then that you were hiding something. I didn't know what it was, but I knew I couldn't leave that kid without finding out. If you'd have just said that he was having problems and why you were afraid of losing him, I would have accepted that. It was your constant scheming to drive me out of town and the way you kept targeted me and my friends that made me believe I needed to get Henry away from you."
Regina's gaze dropped to the floor again. "I know it wasn't the right way of approaching the situation. But in all my experiences, I've learned that sensitivity and leniency never get me anywhere. In all the difficult places I've ever found myself in or whenever I've felt threatened by someone else, if I showed any signs of weakness I always ended up losing. It's how in the past I've lost those dearest to me. So when you came poking your nose into my life, with your actions threatening to take the one person I still had left, I reacted the only way I knew how. Henry is all I have left. He's the only person I love who's still in my life, and he is the only one who may still love me. I couldn't lose him."
"Henry does love you."
"I know that. But at the time I didn't. And when you showed up he started spending even less time with me. He stopped listening to me, he started skipping school and not coming home just to avoid me and to spend more time with you. He said that he knew I didn't love him so how could he possibly love me." Regina ended with a quiver in her voice.
"He said that?" Emma asked, her voice almost a whisper.
"Yes. I don't think he entirely meant it but it hurt all the same. So when he told me he wanted to leave Storybrooke to go and live with you in Boston I realized my worst fears had come true. When I adopted Henry I finally had a chance at happiness. We were happy, for years we were happy and we had a good life together. But then I ruined it all. I wasn't there for him when he needed me most. I had kept my heart closed for so long I'd forgotten that sometimes the heart needs time to heal. So when Henry began to notice that there was something not quite right about Storybrooke... that he didn't seem to belong, I wasn't able to show him that it wasn't true. I wasn't able to show him that he lived in a town where people cared about him, and that he had a real home and family with me. Instead I sent him to therapy, and that only seemed to make him believe that I thought he was the problem. In truth I just didn't know how to help him. It had been so long since I'd dealt with my own unhappiness that I couldn't help him overcome his. I've always buried my pain and replaced it with anger. I couldn't allow Henry to do the same."
"And then Mary Margaret gave him the book."
Regina nodded sadly. "She thought it was just a book of stories. She thought it would help him. But instead it made things worse. He grew even further away from me and became obsessed with exposing me for who I really am. That's one thing I'm afraid of for when the curse is finally broken; that even after all of this, even after he said he would never leave me again, when he realizes that I really am the Evil Queen he might never forgive me again. And I don't think I would blame him."
Emma furrowed her brow as she contemplated this. "I don't think that will happen. Operation Cobra isn't about bringing you down Regina. It never has been. Henry only wants the curse broken because he wants everyone to have their memories back. All he wants is for everyone to be reunited with their families and have their happy endings."
"Are you saying... Do you think that once the curse is broken he'll still want to stay here with me?" Regina asked hopefully.
"Of course he will. That kid upstairs still believes in the curse one-hundred-percent. He knows who you are but he still loves you. He'll stand by you, I know he will. You're his mom."
A tear escaped through Regina's lashes. "I really hope you're right. I don't think I could survive losing him again."
Emma's thoughts went back to what Regina had said earlier to Henry. "You've truly been the best thing that has ever happened to me."
The words caused a shiver to run down Emma's spine. It was her love for him and the heartbreak she had felt after losing him that had almost cost Regina her life. She was willing to break the curse that was protecting her from the townspeople's wrath just because she wanted him to have a good life, and the only reason the curse was threatened in the first place was because she had adopted Henry and he had gone to find Emma to break it. Anyone who said Regina wasn't capable of love was seriously mistaken.
"I'm afraid to break the curse." Regina whispered. "I don't know what's going to happen. It's been nearly twenty-nine years, how are people going to react? They know I don't have magic here. They know everything they feared about me is gone. I'm powerless here."
"But when the curse breaks won't everyone be returned to the Enchanted Forest?"
"I always thought so too, but after recent conversations with Gold I don't think that's true. I think we're stuck here."
"Oh..."
"But in all honesty I really hope we don't go back."
"Why?"
"Because Henry wasn't born there. If breaking the curse sends us back then Henry will be left behind all on his own, and Storybrooke would be wiped out of existence."
"He will?" Emma asked, crestfallen. "Wait are you sure I'll be sent back too? I wasn't taken by the curse so wouldn't that mean I would be left here too?"
"No. Because you don't belong in this world, you never have." Regina explained gently.
"But if that's what breaking the curse does we can't let that happen. Henry can't be left behind! Is there any way of knowing for sure whether or not we'll be sent back?"
"I don't think so."
Emma's shoulders sagged as she thought over this new information. "Would you consider not breaking the curse?"
"I don't want to break the curse. But I can't have Henry growing up in a town where he and you are the only two people who ever age."
"But that would be better than leaving him here on his own."
Regina sighed. "Then I'm afraid I don't know what the answer is. Breaking the curse is a big risk to take, but if we do end up staying here then it will all be worth it."
"But if breaking the curse sends us back then we'll be forcing our son to become a homeless orphan."
Both emotionally and physically exhausted, Regina covered her eyes with her hands.
Emma glanced at the clock. "Whoa, it's almost five o'clock. We should go to bed before the sun starts coming up. Look, I know this stuff is really important but I think maybe we should continue this conversation when we're both thinking more clearly."
Regina nodded her agreement, not meeting the other woman's gaze. "I'm sorry I dragged you into this."
"Don't apologize." Emma said as she stood up and grabbed the two mugs from the coffee table. "This stuff is crazy but if Henry's involved I'd rather know the truth."
Regina looked up at Emma, staring at her curiously.
"What?" Emma asked, pausing before heading towards the kitchen.
"I must say, you've been taking this all rather well."
Emma grinned. "Yeah well, I guess spending so much time with Henry has made me accustomed to hearing stuff like this. And for some reason, despite the fact that this all sounds like a load of bull, I just know that you are telling the truth."
Regina smiled. "Or maybe it's because deep down in your subconscious you've always known where you are really from."
Emma breathed out a laugh. "Maybe. Have a good sleep Regina."
A/N: Thank you for reading! I hope you liked it, please let me know what you think!