CHAPTER SIXTY-FOUR

"What do you mean, 'you're staying at Hogwarts?'" Jane asked.

Another month had passed, and James, Sirius, and Peter had just signed up to stay at Hogwarts for the Christmas holidays.

"Mum and Dad are going out of the country," James lied.

"And they're not making you come with them?" she asked.

"Nope."

"I find that hard to believe," she said, but she rounded on Peter. "And you?"

"I-I just wanted to stay," he said.

"But you love Christmas holidays," Jane said. "You talk about it all the time!"

"We can't stay at Hogwarts for one holiday without an interrogation?" Sirius asked, his eyebrow raised.

"But…who am I supposed to ride the train with?"

"What am I? Chopped liver?" Remus asked, throwing his hands up.

"Of course not; it's just become a kind of tradition, hasn't it? It's gonna be weird riding the train without all of you," Jane said.

"You could stay too," Peter suggested, and Sirius elbowed him in the gut.

Jane, who was still looking at Remus, didn't see this.

"No, my parents are gonna make me come home," Jane sighed. "Besides, I'm kind of looking forward to Christmas at home this year."

After all, her mother hadn't had an episode all summer, and Jane had received a letter from her just yesterday.

"Well, that's not our problem," Sirius said.

Jane had rolled her eyes, letting the subject go as they all ate lunch. But she couldn't help but feel that familiar sensation of not being told something, of being left out. So she left lunch early and made her way to Hogsmeade by herself. It was Tuesday, and she didn't have any more classes for the afternoon. The boys had Muggle Studies, so she'd have at least an hour before they came looking for her.

Jane sat at her favourite spot on the edge of the woods, the little white cottage in her view as she snacked on chocolate frogs and worked on her Defence homework. The mother and son weren't outside today, and considering how cold it was, Jane didn't blame them. Jane had to keep pulling her cloak closer to her, but she really didn't want to go to the Three Broomsticks by herself, and the Gryffindor common room got boring after a while.

So, Jane stayed put, occasionally looking up from her work to imagine how warm and cosy it was on the inside of the cottage. She could just imagine the young mother sitting in front of a fireplace with her little boy and reading him stories.

Jane smiled. That's what her mother did when she was little. She'd bake a Christmas cake and read her Christmas stories. And while Jane was too big to sit in her mum's lap and too old for Christmas stories, she would like to help her mum make a Christmas cake this year (even if she didn't eat it).

Jane vaguely wondered if the family in the white cottage knew anybody that had gone missing or died. Then, she wondered how she would feel if someone she knew had gone missing or died. She shuddered at the idea. The thought of her friends and family being taken from her was horrifying, so she forced herself to focus on her Defence homework.

A week later, Jane boarded the Hogwarts Express with a surprisingly optimistic outlook despite the Easter fiasco that had happened the prior term. After all, she kept reminding herself, her mum hadn't had an episode all summer.

The train ride was kind of peaceful with just her and Remus. They talked and laughed about senseless things, neither one of them mentioning Remus' copy of the Daily Prophet he had received that morning, though it was in the back of both their minds. It was the Christmas holidays; they didn't care to think about how messed up and cruel the world was at the moment.

After the train had finally stopped, and the two friends said their goodbyes, Jane stood at the barrier, thinking to herself.

Don't expect her to be here. If you expect her to be here, and she's not, then you're just setting yourself up for disappointment, a part of her thought.

But it would be really nice to walk through the barrier and see her, the other part of her thought.

Jane stood there for a while, trying to talk down her expectations. After all, the times in which she had expectations were the times that nothing went as planned. Finally, she took a deep breath and walked through the barrier.

At first glance, Jane was disappointed because she did not see her parents. However, when she pushed through a crowd of people she smiled when she saw both of them.

Meanwhile, back at Hogwarts, James, Sirius, and Peter were trying to fan away the black smoke that had risen from their cauldron in the abandoned girls' lavatory on the first floor.

"You idiot! Look at what you did!" Sirius said to Peter.

"What? I did what James said!" Peter replied.

"Well, the book says it's supposed to turn a pale blue. Does that look pale blue to you?" Sirius asked, pointing to the dark green potion.

"I did what James told me. I put the Moonseed in, and—"

"Moonstone!" James said. "I said Moonstone! Not Moonseed! We don't put the Moonseed in yet!"

"How long is this going to take us to fix?" Sirius asked.

James thumbed through the pages of the book.

"A week, give or take a few days," he said.

"Good going, Wormy! At this rate, we'll be staying at school for Easter too!" Sirius complained.

"No! No more mistakes!" James said. "I'll end up killing one of you if I have to work on this potion over Easter as well. Now, someone, hand me a Bezoar."

Despite the boys' trouble, things back at the Hensworth household were doing just fine. Jane hadn't received any detentions so far, so her parents weren't mad at her. Her mum seemed happy. Her parents weren't fighting. And so, Jane was content with letting herself believe that everything was perfect.

However, perfection, as it is known to all men, does not exist in this imperfect world.