Chapter 5: Fear
After Edythe had calmed down from the nightmare, she initially refused to go back to sleep; with Beau's encouragement, however, and his promise to stay awake until she was soundly asleep, she gave in. It was well after three in the morning when she agreed and it was only a matter of minutes before she was unconscious again. Beau lay besides her, gently running his hand along the side of her torso, waiting to see if she would wake up again.
He didn't have to wait long; twenty minutes after falling asleep, Edythe was murmuring once more, her body tensing repeatedly as if she were being attacked. Beau propped himself up on his elbow and wrapped his other arm around her, his fingers intertwining with hers. Edythe buried her face in the sheets, another scream ripping up her throat Beau hushed her softly.
This time, Edythe woke herself up, her eyes snapping open and her body shaking as she gasped for air. Beau held himself over her protectively, all the while his lips near her ear, murmuring calming words to her. She shuddered, curling in on herself into Beau's embrace, her retained horror from her dream warring with her fatigue.
Eventually, the exhaustion won. Beau stayed awake, the time passing by agonizingly slow as he waited for her to have another round of hysteria. This time, though, Edythe's unconscious knowledge of Beau's presence, falling asleep in his arms—which were much stronger than she had ever realized—seemed to calm her overloaded mind, and she slept through the rest of the night.
Beau eventually relaxed his hold on her, but neglected his own fatigue in favor of making sure he was awake in case she woke up in such a state once more. She muttered and tossed every once in a while, but she stayed unconscious. It was the early hours of the morning that he finally fell into an uneasy slumber besides her.
When Beau awoke, the light coming through the glass wall quickly made it apparent that it was much later than he had intended to sleep in. With a low groan, he pulled himself out of bed. Edythe slept soundly in the twisted covers and he crept into the bathroom next door quietly so as to not wake her. He showered and went through his morning routine automatically, his mind filled with the worries for today. It was Edythe's first full day as a human; the day Archie, Eleanor, Jessamine, and Royal were due home, as well as the day Charlie expected him back at the house.
This last piece was the one that was concerning him at present; he had been through each of Edythe's episodes, at a complete loss of what to do. His presence did help her, once she was coherent enough to realize it, but the nightmares continued throughout the hours, as was obvious from her restlessness.
This coming evening was dawning on him; where would Edythe sleep?
Beau felt a surge of unease at the thought of leaving her alone to deal with the dreams; and he didn't believe she was comfortable enough with her family to allow them to help her. He sighed as he hastily dragged a comb through his wet hair; he hoped Archie would have seen this predicament too and had a solution.
Edythe was still asleep when he returned in fresh clothes; watching her rest so peacefully, especially after the turmoil last night, he couldn't help but smile. But one glance at the clock made it obvious that she needed to wake up; she would be hungry soon anyway. He carefully sat besides her sleeping form on the bed, bending down to press his lips to her temple.
"Edythe? Time to wake up," he said. A low moan from her made it clear she had heard him. She shifted underneath the blankets, curling further into them. He chuckled softly.
"Come on," he encouraged. She slowly turned on her side to face him. Her green eyes were brilliant but bleary from sleep. She scrunched them as she shook her head, tucking the pillow underneath her head, obviously refusing to make her way into the conscious world. Beau shook his head but grinned; he reached under the blankets and shook her gently, trying to keep her from falling back asleep. Edythe groaned in response.
"But it's warm," she whined. "Now I know why you don't want to get up in the morning," she said as she swatted his hands away. Deliberately, she turned away from him and cuddled into the blankets.
"Oh, no you don't." Suddenly, Beau's arms were underneath the sheets once more, pulling them off her. She let out a cry in protest as her body was introduced to the comparatively cold room. Keeping her eyes shut, she grabbed for the end of the comforter, trying to pull it back over her body. Beau quickly snagged it from her reach and hovered over her, his lips against her forehead.
"You need to get up," he told her, trying to sound stern. She ignored him, trying to fall back into the blissful sleep. Next thing she knew, Beau had wrapped his arms securely around her waist and picked her up off the bed. She squealed, both shocked and slightly annoyed but unable to control the giggles bubbling from her mouth. He held her princess style besides the bed and she flung her arms around his neck, snuggling into his shoulder.
"This works too," she said with a giggle, shutting her eyes. Beau shook his head indulgently.
"Who would have known you would be so difficult to get out of bed?" he mused as he shifted his weight slightly; her petite form made it easy for him to hold her. Edythe looked up to meet his gaze, her expression teasing.
"I have hundred years of sleep to catch up on," she countered. Beau grinned back as he set her on her feet. The moment he let go, Edythe moved to lay back down on the bed. He pulled her back with a laugh, this time carrying her to the entrance of the bathroom before putting her down.
"Go," he ordered, pointing into the room in question. "I will make us breakfast." Edythe huffed but did as she was told, slamming the door dramatically behind her. Satisfied she would stay there, Beau made his way to the kitchen. Earnest was already there, pancakes bubbling on a pan on the stove. Beau smiled and nodded at him in thanks; he opened the fridge, pulling a bottle of syrup from the door as well the orange juice. He fixed the glasses of juice in comfortable silence.
"Do you think she will like these?" Earnest asked nervously as he transferred the pancakes to two plates. Beau shrugged.
"I can't know for sure until she tries them, but I'm pretty confident she will. She seems to have a very big appetite so someone so small," he mused with a grin. Earnest returned the gesture, appeased.
Earnest was nervous about Edythe; he was unsure whether he should stay in the kitchen while Edythe ate, or if he should leave now. He wanted to help her, comfort her as any father would, but he didn't know if her reaction would change in the day since she last saw him. At the same time that he wanted to approach her, he didn't want to push her. He finally decided to wait, letting Edythe's initial reaction be his guide.
Edythe descended the stairs gradually, nervous about facing Carine or Earnest again. Part of her shied away from them, her natural flight-or-fight instinct, but the rational part of her was just ashamed that she had acted that way. They were her parents, she told herself forcefully, they wouldn't hurt her. But as she entered the kitchen, she froze as Earnest met her gaze.
Earnest deliberately situated himself on the other side of the kitchen from where she had entered, giving her as much space as possible. Beau and he watched Edythe carefully to see what she would do. After a long moment, Edythe stepped toward the counter, averting her eyes from her father to the food Beau placed there. Cautiously, she stepped up to sit on the bar stool next to him, taking her utensils while studiously trying to ignore the irrational fear coursing through her body. It was Earnest, he will not hurt you, she repeated in her head over and over.
Beau worked to distract her from her unease, pouring a generous amount of syrup on top of the pancakes, the golden sap dripping down the sides appetizingly. Edythe tried her hand at cutting the food with a fork and knife—granted, after watching Beau do it—and successfully sectioned off a small piece. She looked to her mate, one eyebrow raised. He responded by continuing to eat, lifting a fresh piece lathered in syrup and chewing contentedly.
Cautiously, Edythe copied him, chewing carefully. The warm, sweet taste glided down her throat soothingly and she hummed to herself contentedly. Beau smiled as she began to eat. Appeased that she was eating, Earnest retreated out the far door, leaving the humans to their breakfast.
Edythe relaxed further with no supernatural eyes on her. She and Beau finished eating in companionable silence and soon retreated up to Edythe's room. It was the middle of July, so there was no homework to be done, and the couple were content to lounge around and listen to music quietly on Edythe's massive stereo.
Beau lay on his back, his upper body supported by his elbows, Edythe's head on his chest. Her eyes were drooping, dozing off to the tasteful jazz number playing in the background. But she was stirred by a knock on the door. Immediately, her body locked; Beau rubbed her arm soothingly as he called to the person at the door to enter.
Carine stepped hesitantly into the room, closing the door behind her. Edythe eyed her speculatively, settling back into Beau as he sat, pulling her against his side. Carine offered a small smile, trying to look as unthreatening as she could. She didn't move any closer, staying as far from the couch where the humans sat as possible, not wanting to frighten Edythe any more. But there were things to discuss, things that could not wait.
"I would like to talk to you about arrangements for the next few days. As you know, it's Sunday, Beau, and your father will be expecting you home tonight," Carine began, continuing when he nodded in affirmation.
"But, due to the present circumstances, we have found a dilemma in terms of how best to approach your…transition." Carine looked at Edythe briefly. "specifically, the sleeping situation. After last night, I see you are most comfortable with Beau," she said, looking at Edythe now, who nodded as well, albeit shyly and slightly embarrassed. Though she had not seen or heard them, she figured her parents were well aware of her night terrors.
But, as Carine had been speaking, Edythe realized where the conversation was heading; up until that point, she had completely forgotten about Beau's need to go home. She was so dependent on him now that she had not even considered him not being with her.
"But I am not sure how best to handle this," Carine continued. "I don't know how Charlie would react to an extended absence, especially when we don't know how long that absence would be required; of course, we'd love to have you, Beau, but I understand that Edythe's anxiety is mostly stemmed from our presence." Edythe flinched. She tried to tell herself she had imagined the small pang of sorrow in her mother's voice as she had spoken that.
"The optimal option would be for you two to stay together, but I don't see how either scenario, either here or at Charlie's house, would be exceedingly feasible for everyone involved, least of all you, Edythe."
Edythe did not like this conversation; she did not want to deal with such weighty issues when she was still struggling to figure how to eat and function. But she knew Carine was right; though she was human, there were still expectations to uphold, particularly for Beau's sake. But, even then, Edythe could not imagine any reality where she would survive a night like she had last night without Beau; but, in the same vein, she could not see a resolution to the problem Carine presented. She shuddered, and Beau pulled her closer, guessing her discomfort.
"I can come up with some excuse for tonight," Beau offered, unwilling to leave Edythe alone so soon. Carine, though, shook her head.
"That may work, for tonight. But what about tomorrow, or the night after that?" Edythe looked up to Beau; she knew it was unfair of her to expect him to lie to his father and sneak behind his back for her sake. But the idea of being along tonight, or even with her family nearby, terrified her to the point of selfishness.
Beau looked down to meet her gaze; he could see the desperation and raw terror in her eyes, and he knew he wouldn't be able to leave her alone, no matter the consequences to him.
"I will figure something out with Charlie," he assured both Edythe and Carine. "There has to be a way." Beau insisted, his voice almost forceful as he racked his brain for some solution.
"Did Archie see anything? He could give us some ideas."
"Perhaps, but that is the other reason I came to speak to you," Carine said, her eyes now on Edythe. Edythe could feel her gaze, and she forced herself to meet the honey eyes. Though Carine's presence still unnerved her, the mental thoughts she was shouting at herself was enough to make the effort to give Carine her attention.
"Archie, Jessamine, Eleanor, and Royal are due home very soon," Carine told her. Edythe stiffened; again, another issue was brought to the forefront of her mind. She could barely stand being in the same room as Carine, and the idea of having four more vampires in the house unnerved her even more. But, along with that, was the fact that she was unsure they even knew what had taken place. Idly, she wondered why Archie had not tried to contact her; surely, he had seen this.
"I asked Archie to update the other three on their way back; they will be, undoubtedly, skeptical, but their reactions are something that cannot be sidestepped, unfortunately," Carine said. "We will try to keep them downstairs," she promised Edythe, "But they will want to see you." Edythe shuddered again, trying to suppress it, but nodded. With that, Carine left them be. Beau felt Edythe leaned against his side; she held onto his T-shirt tightly, already anticipating the separation.
"We will figure something out, Edythe," he promised her. She nodded, but couldn't quite believe him. Beau sighed and, trying to distract her, took the remote to the stereo system, changing to the next song. Edythe listened to the new song, recognizing Claire De Lune, and tried to relax against Beau, trying to force the invasive thoughts from her head.
An innumerable amount of time had passed when the quiet serenity in the house was broken abruptly by loud, and steadily rising, voices. Edythe stiffened as she recognized her siblings' tones, though not able to determine their words. There was a heated argument going on the main floor, and both Beau and Edythe listened to the buzzing of quick vampire voices, unable to decipher the words.
It went on for several minutes before finally stopping; Edythe's heart was flying, anxiety and uncertainty make her even more on edge. Fleetingly, she wished for her mind reading abilities, to know what had been discussed and where it had ended. But, she found she didn't have to wait, as there was a second knock at the door.
Carine stepped inside again, easing through a crack before shutting the door firmly. The two humans watched her with mixed curiosity and—in Edythe's case—wariness.
"They are confused, understandably," Carine reported, "As we all are. But they've acquiesced to keeping their distance for the time being, until we figure this out."
Edythe nodded silently, feeling Beau's hand at her side, running soothingly across her skin. But her eyes were on her mother. Carine sensed the scrutiny and worked to look as unthreatening as possible, something she'd had practice in during her first few decades as a vampire working amongst humans. So she noticed the slight decline of Edythe's elevated heart rate, as well as the fact Edythe was looking at her directly for the first time.
The coven leader was able to finally look at Edythe head on, and fully take in the changes. She was surprised—maybe foolishly—how much she looked exactly like she had in the hospital ward in Chicago so long ago, though not as sick. She recalled those days after she had secretively taken Edythe to her home, and how she had begun the transformation that ultimately resulted in the formation of the coven. Carine remembered the stark, vivid emerald eyes, so exact to Edythe's birthfather's, Edward Masen. She remembered how those green eyes stared back at her, begged her to stop the pain as she changed from mortal to immortal, and how that green gradually faded to the blood red of a newborn vampire.
Those green eyes were back now, as deep and brilliant as they had been a century ago. But, this time they were filled with confusion, anxiety, and—Carine had to assure herself it was really there—a little recognition and hope.
As the two continued to stare at each other, Carine made a small motion with her head, silently asking permission to come closer. Edythe nodded silently, just a small movement. The matriarch moved forward cautiously, taking only a couple of steps before pausing. She took note as Edythe's heart rate jumped up at first then smoothed out as she saw her physically work to calm herself down. Carine only moved forward when Edythe gave her the cue, but Carine was surprised—and slightly relieved—as she found herself with half a foot of her daughter.
Beau's arms had wrapped around Edythe's waist as Carine had approached, watching her face carefully. Edythe was tense, but he could see her forcing herself to calm. Her breathing rate changed only slightly, most of the battle being internal.
As Carine stood in front of her, the vampire gave Edythe a longer moment to adjust. Then, so slowly that there was no mistaking it, she lifted her hand. Edythe's eyes widened as Carine made to touch her, but forced herself to stay still, locking her muscles down to make herself get over this fear.
Ever so gently, Carine's fingertips grazed along Edythe's cheek, a familiar, affectionate gesture Carine had done many times over the decades. Edythe looked up to meet the golden eyes, and her own mind wandered back.
She remembered those eyes being the first thing she saw with her vampire eyes
She remembered Carine staying by her side as she changed—though she struggled to differentiate between her own human memories and Carine's recollection of her transformation.
She remembered hearing Carine's voice, always compassionate and patient, how she had explained to her what had happened, who she was, and what this all meant for her.
She remembered the confusion she felt, and the extremity of emotions.
She remembered how Carine had guided her gently, first to learn how to hunt, then to understand her thirst, and finally, the revelation of her mind reading abilities. The entire time, Carine had been there, had been the single immovable, unwavering pillar for her to depend on and latch onto.
She remembered that it was for that reason that she found she began to love Carine as a mother and mentor, and how that feeling had only blossomed over the decades.
These remembrances came back to her with that single gesture, a reminder of all that had past.
"Carine," Edythe breathed; the woman smiled silently, seeing the growth of recognition in Edythe's eyes, and sensing Edythe's own mindset, guessing correctly where her mind had gone. Internally, Carine was elated at the progress; while yesterday, Edythe had not allowed her or Earnest within twenty feet of her, now she had permitted Carine to get close enough to touch her. She hoped Edythe's trust in her—and eventually, the rest of the family—was being rekindled.
But, Carine found the moment was not permitted to last.
Unexpectedly, Edythe's eyes grew wide, staring not at Carine, but past her. The coven leader turned and found Royal, Eleanor, Jessamine, and Archie standing in the doorway. Though she had been sufficiently distracted and did not hear their approach, she saw the altercation now, as Archie tried to grab Royal to pull him back out the door. The blonde-haired man did not listen though, shaking off his younger brother's arm and moving all the way into the room, his flaming ocher eyes on Edythe.
Royal took in the tanned complexion, the soft texture of her skin; he heard the pumping blood in her veins, her frantic heartbeat, and saw her emerald green eyes. Initial disbelief was quickly replaced by an angry and forlorn expression as he took in the miracle before him, the miracle he had wanted for himself.
Edythe cringed away from the scrutiny, her mother's presence forgotten as she took in the intimidating vampire not ten feet from her. Her body began to shake, her breathing turned to quiet gasps as the primal fear bubbled to the surface. Royal's threatening posture and piercing eyes brought back the primitive urge to run, to flee from the vampires before her.
Edythe was on her feet, and Beau moved with her, his arms locking around Edythe's waist. Reacting automatically, he pulled her behind him, putting himself between Edythe and the furious vampire, as well as blocking her view. Edythe clung to the fabric on the back of his shirt, partially to ground herself, but also to keep him from moving forward, toward Royal.
As Beau and Edythe had retreated, Archie and Earnest were suddenly in front of Royal, trying to force him back out of the room. Jessamine and Eleanor were standing in the doorway, their eyes all on Edythe, while Carine stood between Edythe and her eldest son. Eleanor moved forward, her hand going to Royal's arm, trying to pull him back; he shook her off.
Jessamine stood passively in the background, her tawny eyes locked on her newly human sister. Edythe's heart rate was increasing beyond a safe level as the confrontation continued, panicked as she watched her family members contend with each other at an insane speed. Their movements were quick, precise, and—she knew—impeccably, inhumanly strong.
Though some part of her was admonishing her ridiculous behavior, Edythe's natural instinct had overpowered it; like a neon sign on an abandoned highway, a simple conclusion was flashing in her mind: they were vampires and she was not. The fear came off her in waves, obvious to everyone in the room even without Jessamine's gift. All of this happened in only a couple of seconds.
In the next second, Carine had turned to Royal, who had nearly succeeded in breaking free from Archie and Earnest's hands on his shoulders.
"Royal, out. Now," she commanded. He turned his eyes on her, hissing; Carine snarled back, the sound a loud warning. The sounds did not help with Edythe's anxiety; her grip on Beau tightened. Beau did not turn to comfort her as he wished he could, his eyes locked on Royal and the other Cullens, waiting to see what would happen.
Royal's expression was abruptly a mask of shock; apparently, Carine had never corrected him or any of her other children in such a way before, as the rest of the Cullens looked taken aback as well. Royal straightened his aggressive posture, taking in Carine's suddenly challenging stance and narrowed eyes. After a moment, he turned on his heel and—seemingly—disappeared; Edythe cringed from the invisible movements, his absence only slightly calming her. The rest of the Cullens stayed where they were but none of them backed off. Earnest and Archie stared at Edythe while Jessamine and Eleanor stared Carine, still surprised by her response.
Eleanor's head turned to look at Edythe, her small frame hidden behind Beau, only a sliver of her face visible. Eleanor's normal boisterous attitude was now frustrated and slightly sad as she watched her sister cringe away from her; but even she could not beat down the look of wonder that overtook her as she again registered all the sounds and scents which she had first found when arriving home.
Edythe's heartbeat was loud, the thudding organ pumping wet and rich flurries of blood through her newly established veins; her scent had changed to reflect her new form as well, but Eleanor found the allure of blood was nearly nonexistent. Whether that was because of her control or the fact it was Edythe, she could not be sure.
Edythe felt the eyes on her, and she could not help but recoil under their gaze and presence; though the endless mantra was beating at the back of her head—they're your family, they're your FAMILY—she found only fear and intimidation as she took in their figures, a collective unit of a vampire coven. Besides Carine and Earnest, she saw Eleanor's large, deeply muscled form, emphasizing her strength beyond even normal vampiric proportions, and Jessamine, whose history and reflective posture intimidated her more than Eleanor.
Archie was watching her too, but his expression was somber, rather than curious, Surely, he had seen the change once it had happened, as well as everything that had happened since, including her present reaction. She noticed how he had retreated the moment Royal was out of the room, moving to the doorway, to give her distance. But he couldn't stop but look on his little sister, how scared she was, and he being unable to give her solace. The future, both hers and theirs, were all jumbled up, with very few images even coming concrete enough to see clearly, let alone interpret. There was too much confusion and unanswered questions to provide any type of foothold.
Carine and Earnest sorely wanted their children to back down, to move away from their eldest child, who was nearly crazed with anxiety. Now that Royal was gone, Beau had moved slowly to pull Edythe to his chest, wrapping his arms around her protectively as she shook. Though her breathing was no longer gasping, the presence of five vampires in her room was far from comforting enough to get her calm. She regarded her family warily, the danger still very present and real.
"Carine, please," Beau asked. His blue eyes met hers, seeing the request. She complied immediately, trusting his judgement as she ushered the rest of her coven out of Edythe's room. Archie paused right before he disappeared, looking back to meet Edythe's gaze. Her eyes were wide but even she could sense the sadness in her brother's expression. Archie's lips moved ever so slightly, as if to murmur her name, before exiting. Carine was the last the leave, her eyes regretful and apologetic as she retreated from the room, leaving Edythe to Beau.
Edythe's legs gave out in relief, her body curling in on herself as she collapsed. Beau's hands caught her, lowering both of them to the gold carpet and pulling Edythe into his lap. She remained quiet as tears streaked down her face, trying to focus on Beau's words to her. Minutes went by in silence until she caught her breath, the tremors slowing; finally, Edythe pulled back hesitantly. Beau's fingers gently smoothed the tear tracks from her cheeks.
"Is this what it feels like to cry?" she asked; Beau nodded quietly. She remembered the nightmare episodes from the previous night, but had been too tired to register everything. Edythe inhaled through her nose, noting her blocked sinuses and the light migraine on her temples from crying. It was uncomfortable, as well as her face being sticky from the saltwater.
"How about a bath? It will help with your head and your sinuses," Beau suggested, pulling Edythe to her feet. Edythe let him bring her the bathroom before she swiveled to meet his gaze.
"You're not going to leave, are you?" she asked almost pleadingly. He smiled gently, pulling her close to press his lips delicately to her forehead.
"I'll be right here when you get out," he promised. She nodded, accepting that, before retreating into the bathroom. After she closed the door, she locked it; she knew it would make no difference if one of her family tried to enter, but it gave her some peace of mind, knowing they would hear the click of the deadbolt to know she did not want company.
Once Edythe was settled, Beau headed down the hallway, taking the stairs down to the main living room. The Cullens were all there, save for Royal. Carine stood in the center of the room, between the two couches; Archie and Jessamine sat with Earnest on one of the sofas, while Eleanor sat on the arm of the other. They all looked up to him as he moved forward into the room. He stopped before them all, the words coming from his mouth swiftly.
"I think we need to leave."