Running Silent:

Homecoming

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An alternate ME3. Commander Shepard and her team are on the run from Cerberus and trying to make alliances before it's too late. In a galaxy with no reaper kill switch, how can they hope to defeat something so ancient and powerful? Their last hope is a desperate plan that may cost them everything. Shepard/Garrus, other side pairings.

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Disclaimer: This author in no way profits from the writing of this story. All characters, dialogue, or other referenced material from the Mass Effect trilogy belong to Bioware.

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Garrus watched Shepard leave without eating dinner, and what a solemn dinner it was. No one was in a jovial mood after agreeing that blowing up their home systems was their best bet to destroy the reapers. They all knew that the reaper targeted weapon (code name "Scythe"), was a long shot.

Primarch Victus called Garrus to his quarters after dinner, wanting to discuss the plan and its effect on the turian war effort. They needed to increase their evacuation efforts, and also do their best to remove anything valuable from the planet. Prioritization was key—while they might wish to save priceless artwork and historical artifacts, more important were things like the seed vaults.

The entire time they were speaking, Garrus had been dying to go to Shepard. He couldn't help but think of her, alone in her room, blaming herself.

"I've kept you from her long enough," Victus finally said, his mandibles spreading in a slight smile, despite the pained look in his eye.

Garrus looked up at him in shock. He thought they'd been more subtle than that.

"I don't think it's common knowledge," Victus said, answering his unspoken question. "And I won't be the one to tell. Now go. She needs someone tonight."

Garrus didn't have to be told again.

He checked his room first to make sure she hadn't been waiting for him, but was unsurprised to find it empty. He grabbed his overnight bag before walking down to hers and finding it locked. When his knock received no response, he made quick work of the lock and hacked open the door.

She was seated cross legged on the bed as Garrus entered, gazing up at him with a cautious expression.

"I did ask you not to shut me out," he said.

"I know," she said. "And I'm sorry. But I don't want to talk about it. I wish I never had to." She looked down at the bed.

Garrus sat down in front of her with a sigh. "I understand why you didn't want to present the plan, but…" He took her hands in his. "Jane, why didn't you let me take some of that burden from you? You didn't have to do this alone," he said, eyes boring into hers.

Shepard laughed, but it was a mirthless sound. There was a look in her eyes he'd never seen before. "I've always had to do this alone, I think I understand that now. We all sat at the same table, but I shouldn't have mistaken it for more than what it was." She shook her head. "Everything still comes down to me. Nothing's changed!"

"I did," Garrus growled. "I changed." He waited until her blue eyes met his before continuing. "I used to see you like they do. Untouchable. Some kind of… impossible hero."

"And then?" she said, nearly a whisper.

"I learned the hard way that you weren't invincible." He caught the flinch she meant to hide. "And I learned what it was like to be in your position."

She was silent, but he saw it in her eyes—that pained look that came over her every time he mentioned his time on Omega.

"I'm familiar with the burden of command, Shepard. Having to hold yourself at arm's length while earning their trust? Sharing enough to let them feel they know you but never letting them find out you have doubts? Wearing yourself thin to do everything you can, worrying that it's not enough and beating yourself to death when it isn't?" She looked down again, unable to meet his eyes. Garrus knew his words scraped at a raw wound, but he soldiered on and forced his voice steady. "Knowing people have died because of choices you made?"

Shepard looked up at him them, worrying for him instead of thinking about herself.

He placed a hand on her arm. "I know about the burden you're under. You don't have to hide from me. Let me help." He gave her a slight smile. "It's part of the job description after all."

She gave him a wry look. "As my boyfriend?"

He barked a laugh. "That… and your deputy commander."

She rewarded him with a small laugh of her own. "You got me there, big guy."

They sat quietly for a few moments, holding hands on the bed. "Would you like to talk about it?" he asked. "Or I can hold you until you fall asleep."

She gave him a grateful look. "Thank you, but… that's not what I need right now." She trailed her thumb along the back of his hand. "I need something real. Something alive, Garrus. Please." Her eyes begged, a vulnerability that she saved only for him.

"Anything," was his only reply.

Gently he laid her upon the bed, hands stroking over skin where he unfastened her uniform. With her help, he removed his armor, stripping down to the plates as she admired him from below.

"Your body is so beautiful," she said, hungry eyes consuming him. "Like a work of art."

Garrus smiled. "The only beauty I see is before me."

She laughed at that. "With such cheesy lines, Vakarian, I'm starting to think you've been practicing."

He shrugged. "I watch vids," he said casually.

She quirked a brow. "Then why don't you come down here and show me what you've learned?"

He came down to meet her, his lip plates meeting her pliable human lips. He'd been studying and practicing his kissing and had begun to crave the soft touch of her lips.

As they kissed, a hand began to explore her body, stroking her soft skin and teasing her breasts. With effort, he pulled away from her lips, nipping gently down her cheek and throat. She squirmed under him, letting out a soft moan. When he touched her neck, her reactions were almost turian.

As he nipped and licked at her skin, he felt her hand slip between them, stroking the widening gap between his plates until he emerged, hot and ready. Just the hint of her touch was enough to make his subvocals keen.

"I'm ready," she said, meeting his blue eyes with hers. "If you are." When her hand released him, he slid into her slowly, relishing every inch. Shepard groaned as she stretched for him, but he could tell she wasn't hurt.

He kept the pace slow and gentle for a while, looking into his mate's eyes. He wanted—needed—her to know how he loved her.

Soon she squirmed beneath him. "More," she said. "I need more."

He gave her a wicked grin, but didn't speed up. Not yet. This time, he slid his hand between them to give Shepard the something more she craved.

She moaned immediately at his touch on her core, heat building inside and outside her body until she couldn't take it anymore. Garrus began to increase the speed of his thrusts, feeling himself inching closer and closer to his peak.

It was the feel of her tightening around him that set Garrus off, and his own pleasure crashed over him in waves. When the feeling had subsided, he rolled them on their side together, unwilling to separate their bodies. He gazed into her eyes.

"I love you, Jane," he said. "I don't love you less because of what you said today. I never could."

She gave him a sad, grateful smile. "I don't know what I would do if I didn't have you, Garrus."

…

The next day all the leaders went their separate ways. Most had secure locations that they ran their operations from. It was better, Shepard thought, that she didn't know where they were going.

Wrex and Bakara had decided to remain on the Normandy until the genophage modifications were done. Mordin, who would be heading up that task, was coming with them. Afterwards, Wrex and Bakara would return to their people, while Mordin would be reassigned to work on the Scythe.

The shuttle ride back to the Citadel was not as quiet as the previous ride, not with Mordin joining them. He was incapable of working quietly. He constantly muttered and hummed as he worked on his omni-tool, which was enough to drive anyone crazy. Thankfully, he wasn't offended when Wrex snapped at him.

"Apologies," Mordin said quickly. "Annoying habit, I know. Hmm… lab still on Normandy?"

"It's untouched," Shepard assured him. "We always hoped you'd be back."

"Excellent!" he beamed. "Wrex and Bakara, please report to lab before we reach Tuchanka. Need samples to start working on cure."

Wrex shifted uncomfortably. "Samples? What kind of samples?"

"Reproductive tissue, of course!" Mordin replied, unaware of the krogan's discomfort. "Will begin to run tests immediately! Sooner begun the better." He continued humming to himself. Wrex let out a huff and turned away.

When they reached the Normandy, Miranda met them at the airlock. "Liara is on the QEC," she said to Shepard. "Please come to my quarters when you are finished." She looked at Garrus and Mordin. "Solana is waiting for you in the main battery, Deputy Vakarian. Doctor Solus, your lab is ready for you." And then she turned to the two krogan. "Please feel free to use the observation lounge on this trip as you did before. The mess is also open to you. If you'll excuse me." She headed into the cockpit, leaving the others staring after her.

"Well," Shepard said with a shrug, "back to work I guess." They all went their separate ways and she headed into the QEC, dreading the conversation that was to come. Liara wasn't going to handle the plan well. Not at all.

After she'd explained everything, Shepard could see she had been right. Liara was barely keeping her composure.

"But it's just a back up plan, right?" Liara asked, her big eyes pleading. "We're going to work on this weapon first."

"We won't do it if we have another option," Shepard replied, emotionally exhausted. "We need to put everything we have into the Scythe project so we don't have to."

"I'll gather my resources," Liara said, determined. "I'm not going to lose Thessia." And the feed went dark.

Shepard sighed, rubbing the heels of her hands over her eyes. She composed herself before stepping out of the room into her information center. "T'Nara, I need a report on the last four days of the war. Have it on my terminal within the hour."

"Yes, Commander," the asari said as Shepard breezed through to the elevator. Stepping inside, Shepard prepared herself for the next conversation. While technically Miranda wasn't meant to be privy to the plan, Shepard didn't keep things of importance from her. At least Miranda would handle the news with equanimity.

In her clipped, economical way, Miranda explained all recent goings-on of the Normandy and important events of the past few days. Then she remained still and silent as Shepard detailed the decisions of the summit. It was obvious that Miranda didn't have much faith in the reaper-targeted weapon either. Their best bet seemed to be the nightmarish plan B, which the humans on the summit had dubbed Project Pyrrhus.

"I'll need our ex-Cerberus scientists working on the project," Shepard told her. "They were studying the relays already, so hopefully this won't be too much of a stretch."

Miranda nodded. "I'll have them reassigned." She paused. "Do you think we'll need it?"

Shepard sighed. "I'm praying to whatever's out there that we don't."

"I'll take care of everything. Shepard," Miranda assured her. "If you don't have anything else you need to do after this, I think you had better check on Garrus."

Shepard paused. "Why?"

Miranda met her eyes seriously. "Solana got some bad news while you were gone. Their mother has passed away."

Without another word, Shepard was out of her chair and through the door. She didn't see Miranda's worry as she left the room.

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