NOTICE: The following section is canon. It happened. Nobody knows how, but it happened.

…

Tale #3: "Nutty Nuptu—Wait, Who's Getting Married!?"

BAM BAM BAM! "Leynne! You stubid man!"

Leynne jerked awake and immediately sat up upon realizing that the shriek of a Gelto accent had not been a part of his dream as he had hoped. Instead, his fears were confirmed: Dubbl was mad at him. Again. It seemed to have been the beginnings of a growing trend in the past couple of weeks. First had been his suggestion that they re-rig the Island Symphony with material that other Skyrider vessels were using since it was lighter and stronger than the sails they had rigged up on the surface. Dubbl had disapproved the sails for being too thin. When Leynne had tried to push for the new sails, she had pushed back and shoved him down the port stairs into the cargo hold (taking out poor Cale in the process). That had been two hours of punishment at Dholit's hands. Following that had been her request that another cook be hired so that the nightshift could eat without resorting to leftovers made by Lilly before she would go to bed. Leynne had told her that she had to wait until some more engine crew could be hired. Dubbl had pushed that time, and, when Leynne had told her that he would not take the matter to Link, she had clocked him in the jaw. Two more hours with Dholit, although Link had mentioned later that he would be looking for another cook. Only Nayru knew what Dubbl would be bringing to his attention, in addition to how he would be hurt, this time.

That was to say that Leynne was not afraid of Dubbl. On the contrary, she seemed to annoy him more. But he believed that he had discovered the secret to handling her.

Shout right back in her face.

With that, Leynne stood up and stomped over to the door wearing only the bottoms of his long underwear. He opened the door with a jerk, hoping to startle her out of her anger. "What the hell is—" was all he was able to get out before—

PAP!

Dubbl punched him in the nose.

"AAAGH!" Leynne roared as he stumbled backward with his hands over his nose. He leaned on the edge of the desk behind him and breathed for a moment before shouting through his hands, "Lohds and ladies! Why the hell do you have to hit, woman!?"

Dubbl crossed her arms and leaned her shoulder against the doorway. "You make me mad," she answered in a huff.

"What else is new!?" Leynne snapped in a nasally voice. He checked his hands, and then he dabbed one hand to his upper lip. When he saw his fingers stained crimson, he told her, "I've possibly lost moh blood to you than injuring myself foh the past seven yeahs."

"Hitting makes me feel bette'," she said.

"I wish you'd hit something otheh than people," Leynne said as he pressed a finger under his nose to hold back the bleeding. "Did you want something, oh did you decide today was 'National Punch-Leynne-In-the-Face Day'?"

"You talk stlange when you wake up," she told him.

"Naturally, you'h one to judge."

"I mad at you."

"Yes, I undehstood that much," he replied in an exasperated tone. "Am I going to heah why?"

"You igno'e me," she accused him, although her tone was hardly as forceful as before.

"Look, Link already ovehruled me on the whole cook thing," Leynne said as he started looking around his cabin for a rag. "What moh do you want?"

Dubbl stepped forward with a small washcloth in her hand. She licked one edge and pulled Leynne's finger away from his nose. "I say, 'I go eat dinne','" she said as she dabbed at the blood on his lip. "You say, 'Okay, I will wait.' I say, 'Good mo'ning.' You say, 'Good mo'ning.' I say, 'I can bling you somezing?' You say, 'No, zank you.'"

"In my defense," Leynne replied, "that last one confuses me a bit." He grabbed her wrist to stop her. "Wheh is all this coming from? Don't the Gelto have anything like common couhtesy?"

"Zose wo'ds, fo' fliends," she said. "I say, 'I go eat dinne'.' You say, 'I will join you.' I say, 'Good mo'ning.' You say, 'You slebt good?' I say, 'I can bling you somezing?' You say, 'Yes, blease.'"

Leynne frowned as he tried to puzzle her words together. She was about to resume dabbing the blood off his lip, but Leynne held her hand restrained in his. "Wait, wait a minute," he told her. However, he still had to think for a moment longer. "Ah you saying that… that through these-these innocuous gestuhes… you've been trying to fliht with me?"

"You not fli't?" she asked in genuine confusion. "You use…" She gave an annoyed huff. "What wo'd? Az-azo… auzodity?"

"Auzodity?" he asked. "You mean… you mean 'authority'?"

"I said zat," she said, her tone returning to irritation. "Auzodity. You sometimes use you' auzodity on me."

"Dubbl, I use authority because some of youh ideas ah genuinely psychotic," Leynne replied.

"Zat I mean."

Leynne stared at her in bewilderment. Then he said, "I may be mistaken somewheh, possibly due to just having the bone in my nose bashed into my brain. Ah… you seriously suggesting that my attempting to stop you from doing stupid things is a sign of infatuation?"

"I know Hylians not same," she told him. His grip had loosened, and she returned to cleaning the blood on his face. "You stob me. You ca'e."

"So, should you be involved in a bah brawl, shall I assume it to be a precuhsoh foh an ohgy?" Leynne asked. Dubbl used her free hand to slap his right temple. "Ow!"

"Not say stubid zings."

"What's the smaht thing to say?" Leynne asked in irritation.

Dubbl held up the washcloth and allowed it to unfold to show the extent to which Leynne's blood had soaked into its white fabric. "You say, 'Zank you, I will clean fo' you.'"

"How chahming of me," Leynne replied in a flat voice as he took hold of a clean corner of the cloth with two fingers. "Pehhaps, in two months, I'll be so enamohed that I'll propose to you."

…

Two months later, because the goddess Nayru thought that Leynne's life could use such irony.

Of course, it was not as if Leynne's sardonic attitude toward the prospect remained. After Dubbl's roundabout confession, both had changed the way they had behaved around each other. Each time Dubbl had hit Leynne, her apology kissing had become more and more involved until Leynne had begun to feel the necessity and even anticipation of those kisses. Afterwards, it had not been about apologizing; there had been times when Leynne had drawn parallels between Cale and Lilly, whose amorous antics had been a source of jest ever since the whole crew had nearly been captured/killed by Captain North. Leynne and Dubbl had managed to keep it a little more discrete than that, so it had come as a surprise when Leynne had announced to the rest of the crew that he and Dubbl would be getting married. Sello had been the only one to not be shocked at the revelation, although Leynne and Dubbl had had to remind each other later that he had probably still been drunk.

The chapel they had found was more than large enough to fit the crew of the Island Symphony. Because it doubled as a reception room, the crew, as well as the assistant manager of the Skyriders' Sagacity Island branch office (there for record purposes), had been scattered to the small tables around the room. Helo and Lidago, being too large to sit in the chairs, sat at a bar on one side of the room. Link (with Irleen overhead), Line, and Gold shared the table closest to the altar.

Leynne, dressed in his blue airman's tunic and a pair of white slacks, waited in front of the altar. Behind the altar was the elderly clerk who maintained the chapel, dressed in a pink duster with white lace along the collar and at the sleeves. He wore a pair of reading glasses with which he reviewed the marriage manual hidden behind the altar. The man had been grateful that, for once, an airman's marriage did not have to be rushed for fear that the airman would lose his post. Although, when Leynne had told him that he would be marrying another airman, he had shown a great amount of confusion and discomfort until he had met Dubbl.

Flower, standing nearby as Leynne's assistant, leaned backwards to ask the clerk, "Find it yet?"

"Sorry, no," the clerk replied. "I was sure I'd seen it in here before, but marrying two airmen seems to come under the context of two different ceremonies."

"I once heard that the whole crew of the Sail of the Times got married in one night."

Leynne turned to him with a surprised look on his face. "The whole crew?" he asked.

Flower nodded. "All one-hundred-and-twenty." Then he started chuckling. "Of course, there was shore leave, wenches, and an unhealthy mixture of grog involved."

"Of couhse," Leynne repeated. "One can only hope that such an occuhrence would be met with a healthy amount of smothering should we befall the same situation."

"Dibs on Layna if it does!" Line shouted, turning to point at Link.

"Shut up…" Link told him in a tired voice, pulling the clingy cape of his formal uniform from his sleeve for the tenth time that day.

The doors opposite the altar opened, and a single figure stood in the doorway. She wore a bright red, skin-tight top that left her shoulders, collarbone, and midriff bare. As if to compensate, she wore a shirt of thin material and a similar color that had been secured around her wrists and at her neck. Her baggy trousers were maroon and slung low on her hips. Leynne could feel blood rush to his cheeks until he tried to look up at her face. She had a pure-white veil covering her head.

"Can… she see all right?" Leynne whispered to Flower while the rest of the room stood up in respect.

"She must be wearing two of them," the clerk spoke up. "Where are the other women? They're supposed to come in with her."

"Probably got confused," Flower said as Dubbl started forward. "It's a little difficult to tell them anything; Hylian isn't their first language." He glanced over at the clerk. "Should someone go help her?"

"Yes, yes, of course," the clerk replied. He looked down at the nearby table. "One of you young men perhaps?"

"I got her," Line immediately said, jumping to his feet. He hurried over to Dubbl and, after a quick word, took her hand and had her hold onto his arm. Line had to pull her away before she ran into the table Lawrence, Harley, and Sello shared, and then she was standing at the altar next to Leynne.

The clerk had to tear his eyes away from her bare midriff. Then he had to shoo Line away when he would not leave. "One moment, please," the clerk then told them as the crew took their seats again. "I'm afraid I'll have to wing this."

While the clerk perused the book once more, Leynne leaned over and whispered, "I thought you wanted to weah the blue outfit."

"Red is a much moah flattering coloh on me, my dahling," she replied in a normal voice, loud enough that Link, Line, Irleen, and Gold could hear.

Leynne felt his anger set in. However, before he could level an accusation, Link stood up and snapped, "DHOLIT!"

"Yes?" she asked, turning her head.

Leynne grabbed the veil and ripped it off her head to find Dholit grinning at him. "What the hell ah you doing!?" he shouted at her.

"Dubbl was nehvous, so she asked me to go fihst," Dholit replied. "I assumed that she wanted me to mahry you fihst befoah she did so."

"Dholit, go sit down!" Leynne snapped at her. Dholit gave a mocking laugh as she danced toward the empty table near the front of the room.

The clerk glanced between Leynne and Dholit for a moment. Then he asked, "That… isn't her?"

"That, Sih, is a lunatic in provocative clothing," Leynne replied. He glanced down at the veils in his hand and threw them aside. "It is pehhaps heh most dangerous technique."

"Sorry, Leynne," Link spoke up. Leynne turned to find that Link was leaning one arm on the table while a hand covered his face. "We should know better by now…"

A few moments later, Dubbl stepped into the doorway, and the whole party stood again. She wore her blue tunic over a navy blue, knee-length skirt. She also wore socks that rose to her mid-calf to protect her from her scuffed-up work boots and a pair of elbow-length, white gloves. She lowered her head at the sight of Leynne standing at the altar, although the veil over her face covered the rosy tinge rising to her cheeks. When she started across the room with slow, measured steps, Biluf, Layna, Twali and Lwamm filed in and spread out to flank her. She took her place next to Leynne in front of the altar, and all but Layna moved to join Dholit at the table. Layna was also wearing her airman tunic, and she nervously played with the throwing blade she hid in one hand.

"If the protectors will close ranks…" the clerk said. Flower moved behind Leynne, and he had to gesture to Layna to do the same behind Dubbl.

The clerk then cleared his throat and signaled the room to take their seats again. "Welcome friends, colleagues, and…" He paused and glanced over at the Gorons. "… ah, countrymen. We are gathered here today to witness Lieutenant Leynne and… ah, Airman Dubbl as they join together in the bonds of matrimony."

The clerk paused to give a small laugh. "I, uh… I do apologize for the casual tones with which I address this party. I am afraid that I have had very little preparation for these circumstances." He paused again, and, in that pause, he seemed to have an idea. "But then… It is often said among us marriage clerks that love can appear anywhere. At home or school, at work or play. Well, it appears that work in this case has taken on a special meaning for these two. Never before have I had to marry a pair of airmen, let alone those from the same ship. There is something to be said about romance between two coworkers. Rough days in between islands…" The clerk gave a silent stammer when he realized that he did not know a thing about life on an airship. "Uh, being around each other for hours on end. I-I would imagine that it would make you closer or it would cause you to hate each other." Leynne and Dubbl exchanged a look. The same thought between them was shared with their shipmates as the crew knowingly looked and even grinned at each other. "It would seem, in your case, that it has caused you to fall in love.

"It is a large step to enter into a contract with each other. A contract that says you wish to be with this person for the rest of your natural life and perhaps even into the life beyond this one. A contract that says you will look at no other the same way as you look at each other. You have both come here, of your own free will, to be bound by that contract and willingly express to the world your love and devotion to one another. It is a wonderful thing, and I would be pleased to lead you two through the writing and the signing of that contract. It begins wi—"

"HKKKKKKKKKKK!" Attention shifted to the foremost table. Line, having been bored with what little words the clerk had already spoken, had fallen asleep with his head lolled against the back of his chair and his mouth wide open. "HKKKKKKKKKK!" he snored.

"Are you kidding?" Flower uttered while Link stretched across the table to poke Line's shoulder.

"HKKKKKKKKKKK!" Line continued, deaf to the world and numb to Link's finger.

Leynne reached over the altar and took hold of the book the clerk had been looking through. "Might I borrow this?" he asked despite having closed the book as he pulled it from the altar. The clerk gave him a dumbfounded look in response. Leynne then turned, stepped around Flower, and positioned himself next to Line's chair.

"HKKKKKKKK—"

WHAM!

"ARGH!" Line cried out after feeling the leather-bound manual slam the back of his head. He leaned forward with his hands covering the sore spot. "Ooooh-hoh! Oooooow!" he whined.

Leynne returned to the altar and gave the book back. "My apologies, Sih," he told the clerk. "You weh saying?" It was not until this casual return to order that sniggering and hastily covered snorts sounded throughout the room. About the only ones who did not react this way were Link, who was deeply embarrassed by Line's behavior; Layna, who was not entirely certain what had happened; the clerk, who had been horrified by Leynne's use of violence; and Sello, who was too drunk to pull himself away from trying to make the paper flowers in the middle of his table grow using a mental ability he had convinced himself he possessed.

The clerk snapped himself out of his shock with a shake of his head. "Yes, of course," he replied. "Uh… yes, the contract begins with the writing of vows and promises to one another. Have either of you done this?"

Leynne and Dubbl exchanged worried looks. "Eh… I'm afraid we wehn't awah of this proceduh," Leynne admitted.

"No, that's okay," the clerk said with friendly assurance. "This happens quite a bit. We will just apply the standards." He opened his manual and flipped pages until he was in the final quarter of the book. He squared up on Dubbl, whose posture suddenly stiffened. "Airman Dubbl. You have chosen to live the rest of your natural life with this man, Lieutenant Leynne. Do you agree to love and respect him and stay by his side from this point forward, through prosperity and poverty, through good health and illness, to cultivate a family and a home which you both can look upon with pride?"

Dubbl, with a wide, frightened stare in her eyes, had to take a moment to catch up with the list of things the clerk had read to her. Some of the Hylian's words were lost on her, and she bit her lip as she tried to figure out a response.

"Dubbl?" Leynne asked. "Deah, ah you all right?"

"I confused," she whispered to him. "I say what to make you husband?"

"You'll want to tell him 'yes'."

Dubbl took in a deep breath. "YES!" she suddenly screamed in a higher voice than usual. The clerk was taken aback for a moment. Flower pretended to clean out one ear while Layna, having jumped at the sound, quickly leaned over to retrieve her dropped throwing blade. The scream had also startled Line out of a drowsy fight to keep awake, causing him to grip the seat of his chair as if he was about to be thrown off.

The clerk cleared his throat. "Very well, then," he said. Then he squared up on Leynne. "Lieutenant Leynne. You have chosen to live the rest of your natural life with this woman, Airman Dubbl. Do you agree to love and respect her and stay by her side from this point forward, through prosperity and poverty, through good health and illness, to cultivate a family and a home which you both can look upon with pride?"

"I agree," Leynne replied.

"Very well, then," the clerk replied. He surveyed the room, completely missing Dubbl ribbing Leynne for giving a calmer answer. "If this man or this woman has arrangements to betroth another, please speak out now or chance the wrath of a broken betrothal."

"Hi-kuk!" Sello hiccupped as he rested his head on the table. The muscular jolt caused him to bang his forehead against the table's surface.

"Thank you, sir," the clerk said while the engine crew stifled their laughter. "Anyone else?" Looks passed around the room due to many in the crew not understanding what the clerk was asking for. The clerk seemed satisfied with the silence. "Lieutenant Leynne, you may raise the veil," he said. Leynne faltered a moment before carefully picking up the veil's lower edge and raising it until he could rest it on Dubbl's crown. "By the power endowed by the civil law of the Kingdom of Hyrule, I pronounce you 'husband' and 'wife'. You may conclude the marriage with a kiss."

Leynne cupped a hand to Dubbl's jaw and gently pulled her forward as he leaned in. Their lips met, and the room suddenly erupted with applause as the crew of the Island Symphony rose in congratulatory reverence. Layna started and disappeared toward the Gelto's table, and Flower looked over in confusion at the space she had been standing in.

After the crew settled down, the clerk and his assistants set up a small buffet on the opposite side of the room from the bar. The crew enjoyed a fresh lunch with each other while Leynne and Dubbl received congratulations from everyone they passed while getting their plates. The couple sat with Link, Line, and Flower while Gold had gone to join Sello and the Gorons at the bar.

At one point, while Flower and Leynne were talking, Dholit approached the table and whispered something into Dubbl's ear. Dholit being Dholit, this raised suspicion at the table. But then Dubbl stood and allowed Dholit to drag her to the far side of the room.

"What was that about?" Leynne asked as he watched the women gather toward the center of the room.

"Wedding tradition," Flower told him. "The tossing of the veil."

"Oh, c'mon, Layna!" Link snapped at the Gelto standing next to his chair. She gave him a curious look, her fork still in her mouth. "My food isn't poisoned, so cut it out."

"Is there something special about this tradition?" Irleen asked as she floated closer Flower and Leynne.

"I really think it's just a woman's thing," Flower replied with a bored tone. "You see, they take the bride's veil and cut it in half. Then th—"

The room suddenly broke out in wild screaming as Twali, Lwamm, Biluf, Dholit, and Lilly dove for the white bundle that Dubbl had just tossed over her shoulder. Lilly was automatically shoved out of the way by Lwamm, but Dholit climbed up Lwamm's sturdy back and snatched the bundle out of the air. The catch caused the rest of the Gelto around her to bicker in Geltoan at her.

"The bride throws it over her shoulder," Flower finished. "The unmarried woman who catches it is expected to be the next in the group to marry." Layna, watching the spectacle, suddenly dropped her jaw open and allowed her fork to hit the floor.

"I wish you'd say these things faster," Irleen told him with an irritated voice. "I had the perfect advantage, Flower."

"You said they cut the veil in half," Leynne pointed out. "What happens to the otheh half?"

"The same thing," Flower replied. He glanced around Layna to watch Dubbl turn and ready another throw. "She only throws it to the person who caught the first one. Catching the second veil is a sign that the catcher lives and loves the first person they set their heart on forever."

Link turned back to him and swallowed hard. "The-the first person?" he asked through a dry throat.

"Uh oh," Irleen uttered.

Dubbl heaved the veil over her head. Dholit opened her hands in preparation to catch, barely having to move from her spot. However, even with the lack of competition—

Whosh! "Whoa!"

—she still did not catch it.

Link had almost fallen out of his chair because of the sudden rush of movement where Layna had been standing just moments before. People could barely see as she leapt onto the empty table near Dholit's position and then perform a spectacular jump through the air. The balled-up half of veil disappeared from sight, and Layna bounced off another table and landed on the bar, startling one of the assistants. When she looked in Link's direction, the whole room saw that she had caught the veil with her teeth. Dholit stood shocked as she stared at Layna. The others in the room all directed their attention to Link's table.

"Dude, that was awesome…" Line said in bemusement.

Link turned around and shrunk into his chair as he asked, "Uh… what-what does tradition say about someone not the first catcher grabbing the second part of the veil?"

"Captain, I think that means you've got more trouble than even you think," Flower told him with a grin.

…

Tale #3 of the Island Symphony – END

NOTICE: I repeat, this tale is canon. To this day, no one really knows what brought Leynne and Dubbl together. All we know is Leynne's visitation to clinics increased dramatically afterwards.