NOTICE: The following is ambiguously canon. It also answers an important question I'm sure most of you would like to know.

…

Tale #16: The Non-Hypothetical Empty Room

"Watch the ceiling, it's—"

Ponk. "Augh!" Flower barked in pain. He held his forehead as he ducked under the low beam.

"Sorry," the man behind him said.

"It's all right," Flower said as he set foot on the floor at the end of the stairs. "I've hit my head on worse." Then he shrugged as the other man descended. "I've actually had worse hit my head, too. Kind of a hazard working with this newer crew."

"The door should be right there."

Flower turned and found the door on the opposite wall from the end of the stairs. "Why is there a bolt on it?" he asked as he unlatched it.

"I don't know; that's how I bought it." Flower glanced back at his friend, an obese man wearing a worn jacket of leather over his stained shirt and work slacks. "The old owners used to keep kegs and caskets down here. I had to strip out all the racks and clean it up because the place got termites."

"And the door?" Flower asked as he pulled it open.

"Replaced it. That's why the bolt; it was the only door I could find that fit."

Flower looked inside to see that the room was solid stone with a low ceiling just like the anteroom. A single light bulb hung in the middle of the room. Flower reached around and flipped the switch on and off to test it. "What happened to the old owners?" he asked.

"They moved off the island. They sold the place to the bank, and the bank sold it to me to fix it up."

Flower pointed at the light. "Is that still a good bulb?"

"Should be; no one's been down to see it for a few months." Then his friend gave him a curious look. "What are you planning to do in here? And am I gonna have to clean it up?"

"Oh, I don't think so," Flower replied, grinning to himself. Then he stepped back out and closed the door. "One of my crewmates is an assassin from the surface."

His friend immediately started shaking his head. "Oooh, no! You're not turning this into some kinda… sick assassin guild or anything!"

"Thom, would you just let me finish?" Flower told him. Thom let his hands drop against his thighs. "It's a little experiment. One of my other crewmates claimed that this one can hide in an empty room. So a bunch of us are gonna shut ourselves in an empty room and try to find her."

"'Her'?"

"She's a Gelto. One of these people who used to live on the surface."

"Oh, like those women who work at the Skyrider office, right? Dark skin, big nose?"

"Yeah. How long can you rent me the building?"

Thom pulled a pocket book out of his slacks and opened it. He mumbled as he read to himself. Then he told Flower, "I have a buyer coming in later this afternoon. Can you be done before then?"

"I figured we'd need a few hours. We wanna be thorough. Do you have any tomorrow?"

Thom flipped a page. "Nope, not for here."

"All right, we'll need it for… how about four hours?"

"Is eleven all right? I have to be at the office most of the morning tomorrow."

Flower nodded. "Sounds good." He held out a hand, and Thom clasped it. "Thanks, Thom."

…

The following day, late in the morning, Flower returned with Biluf, Dholit, Line, Harley, and Layna in tow. He led them down the stairs and stopped in front of the cellar door. "Okay," he told them. "Here it is."

"It's a door," Line pointed out through a piece of candy rolling around inside his mouth. "Dis is why we're givin' up yunks?"

"Shu' up, Line," Harley told him.

"Look, you all know you want to know," Flower said. He pointed at Layna, who gave a start and stared at him in surprise. "Can she really hide in an empty room?"

"Ooooh," Dholit cooed. "Is this youh idea of an experiment? Because I ratheh like wheah this is leading."

"Eeeasy, Dholit," Flower told her. "Here's the deal. Each of you still have a candy in your pockets, right?"

Eyes turned to Line, who froze in place. "Oh," he uttered. "I-I dought you guys were tryin' to buy be off or someding."

"It's all right," Dholit spoke up while Flower gave Line an annoyed look. She took a small pouch from Biluf's belt and removed another green-wrapped piece of candy. "Biluf brought extra. Just in case ouh dahling needs moah incentive."

"You'd think the challenge would be enough," Flower pointed out.

"Pehhaps," Dholit said. Then she held the bag above Line's head. Layna, upon seeing it, gave it a wide-eyed stare and followed it as Dholit shook it side to side. "But this is much moah interesting."

"The Cap'n okay with this?" Harley asked.

"Eh, he thought I was a little crazy," Flower answered. "But he said we could have some shore leave just for the fun of it."

"Man," Line whined. "Dere's odder dings I could be doin' wif sore leave."

"Oy, now," Harley said, slapping Line's back. The slap dislodged the candy from his mouth, but Line reached out in time to catch it before it went over the banister and hit the floor. "Don' knock i'. I like this idea." Line rolled his eyes and plopped the candy back into his mouth.

"Here's how we'll do it," Flower said. "Layna's going in first. She gets ten minutes to find a place to hide, and then we go in one-by-one. Everyone gets half an hour to look for her while she tries to figure out how to steal your candy. No one leaves until the last of us has our half hour." He pulled out a watch and showed it to them. "I'll keep track of the time. The rest of us will wait upstairs. The one who spots her can call her out. Do it soon enough, and we can all go home early."

"And who shall be heh fihst victim?" Dholit asked.

"Biluf's her best friend," Flower said, pointing. Biluf gave a surprised response. "I figure she's got the best shot solo."

"Zhi naguthatak dhol to max?" Biluf asked Dholit, sounding a little offended.

"Waba nayx sayfotak Layna," Dholit answered. Biluf's response was an exhausted sigh, which she used to blow on her bangs.

"Layna," Dholit said, leaning forward to address her past Line. "Waba laxomak ciynwoxot marix za'a'aykwafi."

"Ay'a," Layna replied. Line, Harley, and Dholit then had to press their backs against the wall so that Layna could squeeze past them down the stairs.

Flower pulled open the door and stepped aside so Layna could walk in. "Ten minutes," he said before shutting the door. He also locked it just to be sure she was still inside. Then he turned and asked, "She knows what we're doing, right?"

"If she did not, she would have asked," Dholit replied. "Well. Shall we go upstaihs and debate the practicality of this experiment?"

…

Ten minutes later, Flower brought Biluf downstairs. He unlocked the door and opened it.

"Huh," he uttered to himself as he perceived the black room. He reached inside and tried the light switch. Then he grinned to himself. "Oh, so that's how you're gonna play it, huh?" he said to the room. He opened the door more and stepped aside so that the light from the anteroom shone inside. He saw that Layna had taken the light bulb from its socket. He also saw a box on the floor in the corner opposite the door. "Hey, hey," he said to get Biluf's attention. He showed her that the switch was not working, and then he pointed out the empty socket and the box in the corner. Biluf nodded to him and placed a hand on the wall near the door. Flower gave her a grin and stepped back outside.

Once Flower had shut the door, Biluf sighed to the black around her. "It won't work, Layna," she told the room in Geltoan. "Even if you get behind me, I'll find you once the light is on." She slid her hand along the wall, following it toward the box. "You can take my candy, but I will still find you." Just to be certain she had not lost it already, she put her free hand in her trouser pocket. The candy was still there.

She looked over her shoulder to double-check where the door was, indicated by light slipping through the frame. She used her free hand to feel ahead so she would not hit the back wall. Her hand found the wall, and she immediately knelt to place her hands on the box. She lifted it and put it aside. Her fingertips then discovered round glass. She picked up the bulb. Her stride was careful as she wandered toward the middle of the room, using the door for reference. Much to her fortune, the ceiling was low enough for her to feel the light socket.

"I'm gonna find you~," Biluf sang as she carefully screwed the bulb in. "You won't get your candy~." Once she was sure the bulb was in tight, she hurried to the door. "Prepare yourself!" she declared once she found the switch.

Ctk.

Biluf was blinded by the bulb, forced to shut her eyes. The adjustment came slowly, but once she could see clearly, she cast the room a satisfied look.

And the look quickly faded. The room was empty.

"What?" asked a mystified Biluf as she moved away from the wall. She simply could not believe her eyes. In a room with stone walls, a low, wooden ceiling, and just one exit, she could not find Layna. Biluf, believing that she knew Layna the best, looked over some of the not-so-obvious places like the corners and along some of the boards above her. She shoved her hands in her pockets. One hand felt the candy still in its wrapper. It was a good sign; if Layna had taken it, she liked to leave an empty wrapper to prove it. Keeping both hands in her pockets as she moved should help ensure that Layna did not know which pocket to pick.

Biluf then realized that there was one place she could never be sure of: directly behind her. She knew Layna was too fast and too quiet to let herself be caught by someone trying to look over a shoulder. Whipping around was not an option. But, if she had her back pressed to a wall, it would limit Layna to parts of the room directly in front of her. Even if Biluf never saw Layna coming, the next person to enter would catch her maybe hanging from the ceiling on the opposite side of the light bulb or pressed into whichever corner Biluf was not looking at. Better yet, she realized, if she sat in one corner and kept the other three in sight, Layna would not be able to move at all!

"Very well, Layna," Biluf told the room as she returned to the corner where the box sat. "Even if I don't find you, someone will have to. I'll just wait for the next person." She spun after swiping the box aside with one foot and sat with her back to the wall. She looked above first to make sure Layna was not taking cover there. Then she looked across the room at the farthest corner. With her arms crossed, she gave the room a satisfied smirk.

…

Biluf started when the door opened. She first thought that Layna had given up.

Then Dholit stepped inside. She slouched against the wall as disappointment set in.

"Have you not found her yet?" Dholit asked, amazement tingeing her voice.

"No…" Biluf groaned. She rubbed her eyes, worn and tired from staring mostly at the light bulb. "How long have I been down here?"

"Half an hour," Dholit said. "It's time for me to join you." Biluf shrugged as if to ask "what's the point?". She had assumed that whoever entered the room next would see Layna hiding in plain sight, maybe in a place that would seem obvious and make Biluf feel like an idiot. Dholit sounded like she had yet to see Layna. "Have you determined her hiding place yet?"

Biluf shook her head. "I hoped you would see her. That's why I'm sitting in the corner."

"Well, it would seem that we've underestimated Layna's ingenuity." Dholit glanced up at the ceiling. "Ten minutes would be enough time to find a loose board or two."

Biluf gave the ceiling an exhausted sigh. "I suppose we should've told her to stay in the room." She stood up and approached Dholit. "Where do we start?"

Dholit pointed toward the corner opposite the door. "You start there, I'll start right here, and we'll meet in the middle."

"For a moment, I thought you were gonna say something slutty," Biluf told her with a half grin before turning in the direction Dholit had indicated.

"Not now," Dholit replied. "I have a headache."

Biluf did not even make it to the far corner before she found something. Never having ventured to this side of the room, she discovered that one of the boards in the ceiling was protruding slightly. She stretched a hand up and even stood on her toes, but she could hardly grip what little of the board's edge that had been exposed. So she said, "I think I found something."

Dholit crossed the room and followed Biluf's gaze. "Do you think she can fit through that?" she asked.

"The board's wide enough," Biluf said as she stretched up again.

"Give me a boost; I think I can reach it." Biluf crouched and entwined her fingers together for Dholit. After kicking off a shoe, Dholit rested her foot in Biluf's hands and stretched up to grasp the board. She needed a moment to tug on the end before she could fit her fingers inside the ceiling and pull. The nails on the opposite end gave a protesting groan as Dholit wrenched the board loose.

"Uh…" Biluf droned a moment. Dholit dropped the board to the floor and glanced down at her. "You don't think we're gonna get into trouble for tearing the ceiling up, do you?"

"If we do, I'll just conquer them," Dholit said with a grin.

Biluf gave her a flat look. "You mean 'dominate'?"

Dholit glanced down again and waggled her eyebrows. "Do you need to ask?"

"Only because I'd rather be naïve like that. Can you get inside?"

Dholit tugged on another board until it loosened. "I think I can now," she said as she pried the board off the ceiling. After dropping the board, she put both hands on the inside of the hole and, with Biluf giving her more boost, pulled herself up. Inside, the light of the single bulb in the cellar shone through some of the larger gaps in the ceiling, giving her a view of the larger, vertically-set beams that ran the width of the cellar perpendicular to the boards underneath. Dholit had room enough overhead that she could sit and still not have to worry about striking her head on the stone ceiling above.

The beams formed channels across the interior of the ceiling, and Dholit carefully stepped over one nearby beam and looked back down at Biluf. "You won't believe this," she said. "There's enough space in here that we would never catch her moving."

"So what should we do?" Biluf asked. "Wait?"

"Yes, I think waiting for the next person would be of some help. Another set of eyes would make searching each of these spaces much easier."

…

The door opened after a while. Harley was a little surprised to find that there was only one Gelto in the room: Biluf, who was lying on the floor under a hole in the ceiling. So the first thing he asked was, "The killer ge' one o' ya?"

"Nothing so mohbid, Mistah Hahley."

"Yikes!" Harley shouted, jumping sideways. He glanced up at the ceiling. "Wha'…?"

"We have discovahed Layna's secret," Dholit explained, her voice muffled by the ceiling but still audible. "But I'm afraid that ouh pretty little killah is still eluding us."

"Whacha need me t' do?"

"If you would help Biluf into the crawlspace, we can seahch up heah while you keep watch down theah."

Harley shrugged and said, "Soun's good t' me." He walked over to Biluf just as Biluf was rising to her feet. He clasped his hands together and braced himself. "A'righ', girly," he told her. "Up ya go." Biluf placed a foot in his hands and braced herself on his shoulders. When he raised her, she immediately latched onto the edges of the opening and pulled herself inside. "Ya go' 'nough room up there?" Harley asked the hole just as Biluf slipped out of sight.

"Oh, pehhaps," Dholit cooed from above. "Ah you proposing to join us?"

Harley shrugged. "Ya need me up there?"

"Well, it is not as if I have not made due with a single woman befoah."

Harley scrunched his face in a vain attempt to suppress a grin. "Go' a feelin' ya make due with anythin'," he commented.

"Yes, but very raahly out of necessity." A brief, breathy laugh escaped Harley's mouth before he slapped a hand over it.

"'Inmatikak 'inu nadmatik marix 'aniyguthot, 'itab 'inmatikak wabun niygothot marix 'acaymthi," Biluf remarked in a flat tone.

"Waba nibinak max?" Dholit asked.

Biluf gave a frustrated sigh. "'Inan dhikw sofatidh Layna."

"Mmmm. 'Ankadhay…"

"Dholit!" Biluf snapped.

"Noynadhay?" Dholit suggested.

"Nwoyrotan!"

"Everythin' a'righ'?" Harley asked.

"I'm in negotiations," Dholit called back. "Just a moment."

…

While Dholit's "negotiations" only lasted as long as it took for Biluf to finally tell her to shut up, there was not much more conversation afterwards as the two worked their way across the ceiling trying to find any shadow that would reveal Layna. While they were doing that, Harley wandered around the floor in an attempt to catch Layna moving around. He was able to distinguish Dholit and Biluf moving since the two moved along the walls opposite each other. Not that this really helped; if Layna had to move at any time to avoid the other two Gelto, she was far too silent for him to hear. It left him disappointed because he actually was trying to help find Layna.

Line stepped in after their time was up. And he froze immediately. "Wha-uh…" he started as his words had a horrible collision on their way to his mouth.

"What?" Harley asked as he turned to look at Line.

"Where'd… where'd the other ones go?" Line asked.

Kon kon kon. Line jumped in surprise and looked up at the ceiling. "Hello theah, dahling," Dholit called through.

"What the…?" Line started again.

"We think Layna's in the ceilin'," Harley said. "Dholi' 'n Biluf are up there."

"Oh," Line said. After he closed the door, he crossed the room and found the hole in the ceiling. "Can you use some help up there?"

"Actually," Dholit said as she moved closer to the hole, "I think we might. Layna can only move around so much if theah ah three people up heah. Mistah Hahley, would you mind?"

"Sure," Harley replied. He walked back to the hole and crouched down with his hands clasped together. "Hop on."

Line placed a foot in Harley's hands, and Harley raised him effortlessly up until Line had a hold of the edge of the hole. He clambered through and, with one hand raised to protect himself, tried to stand. Once his hand found the rock ceiling above, he hunched a little lower and turned to find Dholit.

"So what do you think of Layna's hiding place?" Dholit asked him.

"Kinda hot up here, isn't it?" Line replied.

"I can only do so much," Dholit said.

"Yeah," Line said in agreement. Then, after the brief pause it took his brain to reinterpret Dholit's words, he quickly spouted, "Wait, what?"

"Dholit…" Biluf groaned as she approached Dholit from behind.

"Line," Harley told him. "Wha'ever ya do, don' turn yar back on Dholi'. She's been pre'y wily up there."

"Oh, Mistah Hahley," Dholit said, moving so that she could look down on him. "Do you mean to wahn the boy oh entice him?"

"Ya know, fer every minu'e we spend talkin', we ain' findin' Layna," Harley pointed out.

"He's right," Line said. He rubbed his hands together and looked around the ceiling's interior. "Okay. How are we doing this?"

…

Flower walked in and closed the door behind him just in time to see Dholit drop out of the ceiling. As he walked toward the group, who had gathered under the hole, he craned his neck to look into the above opening. "What were you doing up there?" he asked.

"We thought Layna was up in the ceiling," Line replied.

"Biluf and I found a loose boahd heah," Dholit explained. "She was not on the floah, so we thought we'd try the ceiling."

"Thom's gonna want those boards replaced," Flower said. "You weren't supposed to pull anything apart."

"A minoh nuisance in ouh ventuah to discovah Layna," Dholit told him with a dismissive wave.

Flower folded his arms together. "Uh huh," he grunted. "So did you find her?"

"Not even a hint," Line confessed, hanging his head.

"Well, I suppose we've still got time to look around," Flower said as his eyes wandered the empty room. "Did she snag anyone's candy?"

Dholit and Harley exchanged looks upon realizing that they had forgotten the candy in their pockets. Line, however, reached into his pocket and produced the wrapped candy for Flower to see. "I've been patting my pocket just to be sure," he told Flower. "She hasn't gotten to it yet."

"How about you three?" Flower asked.

There was a slight shuffling sound as Dholit, Biluf, and Harley showed Flower their own untouched candies. Well, Dholit and Harley showed Flower. Once Biluf had the candy in her hand, she pulled the ends to untwist the wrapping.

And, instead of a ruby-colored sphere of hard candy, she discovered a rock of a similar shape.

"She got you," Line told her with a large grin.

Biluf sighed and dropped the rock on the floor, her expression indicating a distinct lack of surprise. "'Inan golwaynya'ak hiyxwoltya," she told Dholit.

"What'd she say?" Harley asked.

Dholit, her usual grin replaced with apprehension, looked around at the group for a moment.

"We… we have been taken."

Only a split second of dawning realization set on their faces before Line, Dholit, and Harley removed the wrappers from their candies. Just like Biluf's, theirs had been replaced by rocks roughly the same size and shape of the candy pieces.

"Wha—… when'd she do that?!" Line hollered in surprise.

"Well, I guess we still got mine to keep her busy," Flower said. Line Dholit, and Harley pointedly stared at him for a moment while Biluf, arms crossed, shook her head. Flower stared back at them in confusion. Then he gave a nervous grin. "Nah. She couldn't've grabbed it; you've been looking in my direction this whole time." No one replied, and the grin faded from Flower's face just before he shoved a hand into a trouser pocket. He pulled out his candy and unwrapped it to find a rock inside. "That's impossible! I just came in!"

Then Line, Flower, Dholit, and Harley shared another moment of realization, wide-eyed looks passing between them. "Aw, shit…" Harley groaned.

"The door!" Flower hollered.

They charged across the floor, leaving Biluf still shaking her head at them. Flower reached the door first and made to shove it open.

His face struck the door instead.

Wham!

"Dohf!" Flower grunted. He grasped the handle and shook it. "Wha-why is this locked?"

"It's what!?" Line and Harley hollered.

Flower pounded on the door and shouted, "Thom! Layna! Someone open the door!"

Biluf heaved a sigh and commented under her breath, "Sa'it dha' wabun giyroxwun 'ataynli…"

On the other side of the door, Layna sat perched on the banister as Flower started shouldering the door in attempt to open it. She knew his efforts would be wasted, having taken time to check the sturdiness of the door and the metal bolt. She could see them breaking it down in time, perhaps once Flower and Harley combined their strength to ram the door. In the meantime, she would enjoy watching their struggle for only a moment longer before returning to the ship and informing the captain of their situation.

Well, perhaps she should just go now. It was not as much fun now that she had finished the whole bag of candy. Thinking as much, she stashed the empty bag into a pocket and swung her legs over the banister so that she could walk up the stairs.

…

Tale #16 of the Island Symphony – END

NOTICE: Nobody ever really fessed up to being locked in a cellar for two hours, so this is ambiguously canon. Although Link frequently warned his crew later on not to attempt something like this with Layna. He was concerned that she might not leave survivors.