Jungle Ben 10 fury
I OWN AND REGRET NOTHING!
...III...
ANNOUNCEMENT!
I'M GETTING A BOOK PUBLISHED!
SUMMARY:
On the 13th day of the 13th month of the 13th year...magic will return to the world...and the streets will run red with the blood of the (semi)innocent...unless the world is saved by the most unlikely of hero's...baking cupcakes?!
The title is '13/13/13' and it'll be coming to a bookstore or E-Book site near you! Xilbris is the publisher, also available at Amazon, Inkitt and BarnesandNoble.
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...III...
At the 'Rumble in the Jungle' bar, a clearly exhausted man with a briefcase slumps down onto a barstool.
"Rough day there buddy?" Asked the bartender sympathetically as he slides him the house special: 'A bloody tree frog on the rocks'.
"Try rough YEAR." He pauses to thank him for the drink and starts to drown his sorrows. "My 'boss'- great guy, my company has never done better since he took charge - is a bit of an 'eccentric'. He's into collecting anything, and I mean ANYTHING: Items, people, tricks, junk. Anything that'll give him an edge over the competition." Finishes off the drink and asks that he keeps them coming. "At first it seemed like a sweet deal; I technically get promoted out of that dead-end mail room, i get triple pay plus travel expenses paid...but I've been traveling non-stop for over 4 years! And my expenses are gone over with a fine-tooth comb, that plus some BS 'Morality clauses' in my contract make sure I can't really even treat this like a vacation or even enjoy myself! I haven't seen my wife and kids since LAST year! And there's two more years on my contract if I don't find anything in the rinky-dink backwater towns he sends me too!" He blushes at that last comment. "Uh, no offense."
"None taken, there's a reason Bellwood has been voted 'most boring place in America' for fifty years running..." He admits with a sigh as he polishes a glass. Then he realizes something. "Hold the phone, they sent you to a JUNGLE convention to find something valuable?" Asked the bartender in disbelief.
The man rolls his eyes as he takes another shot. "Buddy they've sent me EVERYWHERE. If there is even a whisper, of a suggestion, of a RUMOR of something, ANYTHING that can give my boss an edge..I get sent there. They've sent me to Turkish prisons, igloos in freaking antarctic, honest to goodness holes in the grounds! It's ridiculous!"
"Now when you say holes in the ground..."
"I MEAN actual holes in the ground, apparently the word of a drunk hobo saying they saw a 'alien' drop some piece of tech in a crapper hole is enough to get me to walk to the middle of death valley..." He pauses to drink as the bartender looks at him as if he was watching a man who'd just been a horrific traffic accident. "Although weirdly enough I've been in to plenty of METAPHORICAL 'holes in the ground'...including a 'Hole in the ground' convention believe it or not..." He explains as he shows him pictures of him indeed being in a convention that indeed seem to be all about holes in the ground...and was itself inside a HUGE hole in the ground...
"Hole in the ground...? What?! How- How is that even a THING?" Babels the bartender baffled as he gives both the man AND himself a drink.
The man snorts, "That's nothing!" He places down a new picture with each new convention mentioned. I've also been to snail racing convention, wingless butterfly convention, broken humidifier convention, Juggling jesters convention- Not jesters juggling things mind you! But people actually juggling the JESTERS, the actual medieval clowns! "
"Dang man!...you know what? All the drinks are on the house, you've earned it!"
The man nods as the bartender goes to get more drinks...then he sees something that makes him groan.
"Sorry need to close up shop briefly. There's some weirdo with a baby-dick that were hopping will go away soon." Said the bartender quickly as he hastily closed down the bar and dove behind the counter to hide.
"Say what now?" Said the man confused...right as his suitcase starts to hum. Confused, the man begins to open it and pull out an odd device.
Ben walks in and sees the 'closed' sign, "Dang it! That's the fifth food stand I've come to! It's bad enough I'm dressed like a creepy nerd, but now I'm getting hungry too!" He storms off annoyed while the guy points the now glowing device after him amazed...
After a couple minutes...the bartender felt it was safe enough to open up shop again. "Alright buddy, want another on the rocks?...buddy?" But the man with the briefcase was gone...
...
Gwen cursed as she realized she'd run out of tranq darts. Bit of a moot point though, it was only a matter of time before all those security guards she'd knocked out were discovered...and she hadn't even found what she wanted! what she needed! What the world needed! She stealthily leaves the 'restricted' area- Restricted her foot! So the convention owner was secretly growing weed, who gave a flying frak?!
She pinched the bridge of her nose, this was getting ridiculous! Dai Shi would soon return! She needed the sacred OmN'i'Tr'I'x and she needed it now!
Gwen calmed herself down and began to think over her options. 'Okay...it wasn't in the gift shops...wasn't in the artificial arboretum...wasn't in the 'loincloths through the ages' exhibit...wasn't in the 'the Jungle man inside us all and how to let him out in this urban Jungle' seminar...wasn't in the food court...wasn't in the 'vine swinging, tree crashing simulator...GAH! Where else could it be!?'
"Dang it, come on man! I just need to know if there's a dressing room nearby!"
Gwen looks behind her and sees some scrawny dork her age who was wearing nothing but a loincloth and desperately trying to talk to a guide who was clearly pretending to talk on a phone and walk away from the weirdo as fast as possible.
Gwen snickered at the idiot, despite the situation she couldn't help but be amazed at how pathetic and unimpressive his body was...
'Yikes, there are some people who just weren't meant to flaunt what they have. And that excuse for a boy is abut as non-masculine as you can get. from his dorky face right down to his tiny willy-
Her eyes went wide, 'You got to be kidding me...' She grumbles to herself.
Ben sighs, "Okay, I'm not getting anywhere with this...it should be dark soon...maybe I should just cut my losses, run home and cross my fingers that no one sees me...wait, but where is home from here? GAH! I just want to get home! Is that too much to ask!?" He grumbles to himself, he turns around and nearly slams into a very cute orange-haired girl wearing nothing but a leopard pelt that nicely hugged her curves...
Ben blushes, "Uh, hello?" He asks awkwardly.
"Hi, listen. I would like to apologize in advance. It's nothing personal, it's just that lives are on the line and I have no time for chit-chat." Says Gwen sincerely.
Ben blinks, "What are you-
CRACK!
Gwen kicks him in the nuts, inciting an eruption of cheering and applauding from the entire convention. Gwen although confused by this, dose not let up and follows up with a punch to Ben's face. Knocking him flat on the ground with a broken nose.
Gwen then proceeds to quickly yank off his loincloth, "Again, really sorry about this! but I'm in a hurr- Wow, how small is your dick?!" Exclaimed a suddenly VERY amused Gwen.
Ben could only grunt as he tries to get on his feet very quickly to grab his loincloth back. Gwen quickly responds by stifling her giggles and kicking him in the nuts AGAIN. "Again, sorry!" She shouts as she runs off as everyone applauds her.
A security guard pops up. "Okay, miss. I think I speak for everyone when I say THANK YOU for having the courage to do what we've ALL been thinking of doing to that pervert all day. But you do realize I have to kick you out no-
"That'sFineIGotWhatICameForI'llBeLeavingNowThankYou!" Shouts Gwen as she quickly runs past him and out the convention door.
The guard looks puzzled, but shrugs. He hadn't really wanted to kick her out anyway, so that was fine with him.
"Hey...what about me? I'm in a LOT of pain...and I need pants!" Moaned Ben as he clutched his now aching testicles on the ground...
The security groaned...naturally, everyone was taking picture of the weirdo and his micro-dick, which would soon be going viral...the convention was probably going to be sued by that anyway so might as well go for broke...
"Well you should have thought of that before you began flashing everyone pervert!"
"What?! What are you talking about!? I was literally striped naked just now!"
"Not from what I saw!" Lied the guard a he grabbed and lifted the poor boy up by the scruff of his neck. "And I'm pretty sure everyone here will collaborate that as well!" Everyone cheered their agreement and the next thing Ben knew he was being thrown into a dumpster outside the building, still naked as a jay bird.
"And stay out pervert!" Shouted the guard satisfied as he dusted his hands off and walked back inside.
Ben just groaned in pain...
...
Meanwhile Gwen was overcome in awe at the artifact sacred to her people. "Finally, after ALL these years...I've been trained my whole life for this moment...now to achieve my destiny!"
She quickly takes off the pelt, revealing a matching leopard skin bikini underneath as well as numerous tribal tattoos. Quickly making sure no one is watching, she takes off her bottoms before putting on the sacred OmN'i'Tr'I'x in it's stead.
Gwen winched as it cut off her circulation a bit. "Okay, a bit more tighter of a squeeze then I'd imagined...and this wouldn't even cover a postage stamp, let alone my labia...but in the name of my people and the survival of the human race...I will endure!" She exclaims triumphantly.
And then her wristwatch started to beep. Gwen smiles at this. "Just in time...Grandpa Max...I will make you and our ancestors proud!"
ZAP!
A portal opens up in the parking lot, Gwen sees an ancient ruin...and ancient door smashed open...Dai Shi had truly escaped...
But Gwen had no time to think on this, for out of the portal spewed forth dozens of Rinshi warriors. they were strange pale creatures. They looked like ancient Chinese fighters, with Tai chi Performance Caps and Xiaolin monk fighting gear. Who seemed to only be able to go about by hopping back and forth...
Gwen strikes a determined fighting pose. "Enjoy your freedom, it shall not last! By the power of my ancestors, the Order of the Claw, and the power of the sacred OmN'i'Tr'I'x. I hereby vanquish thee!"
She gets into another stance, "Power of the sacred OmN'i'Tr'I'x, I call on you! Guardians of the Jungle, I beg for your aide!"
And like that, the sacred OmN'i'Tr'I'x begins to pulse, glow and vibrate. Gwen takes a deep breath then steps forward to prepare to fight-
pop
-and the sacred OmN'i'Tr'I'x then finally popped off from the strain, leaving her half naked and powerless before the vicious monster soldier.
Gwen, both embarrassed and terrified promptly covered herself. She chuckles nervously "Uh...do-over?" She asked in flustered, sweaty panic...
ROAR!
The Rinshi rushed forward eager to rip her to pieces...
...III...
TO BE CONTINUED?
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