Author's note: CW for emetophobia

-x-

The next few days were a whirl of classes, homework, pranks, an awful meetup with Snape for their project which ended with both boys kicked out of the library and banned for twenty-four hours, and an extremely uncomfortable session with Jean-Marie on Thursday evening, minutes after Remus's ban was up. It was uncomfortable because Remus kept thinking how sparkly Jean-Marie's eyes were and how nice his little mustache looked. It made Remus feel hot and squirmy, and he was glad when their tutoring session ended so he could run away.

A hand wrapped around his wrist, preventing him from fleeing.

"Ah, I was—I was having a—" Jean-Marie frowned as he tried to figure out how to say what he wanted. "The Hogsmeade visit."

"Erm, um, what about it?" Remus felt hotter with the other boy's fingers clutching his wrist like that.

Jean-Marie's forehead wrinkled as he thought. "I was wondering if you would—would—show me the town? I have—it is not—ah—it is new to me."

He let go and Remus took a step back, resisting the urge to clutch his wrist. "Oh. Um, I—I'm sorry but I've never—I've not been there either," he lied. "Only the train station. This will be my first year going." And I won't even be able to be there for the first visit.

"Ah. I see."

"One of the fourth years could probably give you a proper tour."

"Tour? Rip?"

Remus tried not to smile. "No. Tour. Ah. Une visite."

His bright eyes got brighter. "Yes!" Then his face dulled slightly. "You cannot?"

"No, I—I've never been."

"Oh. I understand." A big smile. "Thank you. We will meet again on Monday."

"Yes, see you on Monday."

Remus turned knowing someone was nearby since he had heard footsteps, however he was still very startled to find Sirius standing right there. He jumped, then clutched his chest while Sirius giggled, promising he hadn't meant to spook him. Then he grabbed Remus's sleeve and dragged him off. Remus yelped a goodbye to Jean-Marie and stumbled along behind Sirius, assuming he was needed for a prank.

"Where are the others?" he asked when they left the library and found a relatively empty corridor.

"Huh? Oh, James is in detention, remember?"

"Oh, right, I forgot about that."

"Peter's on a date."

Remus dropped his satchel. "What?"

Sirius began laughing, grabbing the satchel before Remus could pick it up. "With Lily. At least, that's what I was teasing him about. No, she's helping him with some homework since you were off with Mr. Baguette."

"Jean-Marie."

"Baguette."

"Sirius, you know French, you could surely come up with something—"

"Tête de noeud," said Sirius with a smirk. Dickhead.

Remus smacked his arm rather hard. "Twat."

"That's a good insult too."

Remus smacked him again. "Give me my satchel back, jerk." Sirius twined the strap around his arm multiple times until the satchel was tucked under his arm. "Please, you're stinking it up, you don't deodorize yourself."

"I put a deodorizing spell on this morning!" Sirius complained, sniffing his other armpit. "Er, I thought I did."

They bickered all the way back to the tower, where Remus indeed saw Lily and Peter sitting at one of the small tables, their heads bent over some papers, a look of frustration on Peter's face and one of patience on Lily's. Peter's hair was all unruly from his pulling at it.

About ten minutes after Sirius and Remus settled in their dorm, Peter came trooping up still looking frustrated. Sirius asked how it went and Pete shook his head, explaining that Lily was having some trouble too. This made Remus curious since there wasn't much Lily struggled with. But when he asked, Peter tried to change the conversation. This made Remus more curious and wheedled Peter until he admitted they had been trying to figure out Spellwhether's Theory.

"I didn't want to ask you 'cause it was—it's to do with—with—" Peter stammered and stopped. Remus cocked his head to one side, not sure what was wrong. "The moon," he finally got out.

"It—" He started to say the theory didn't have to do with the moon, before realizing that technically it did. "Oh. Yeah. Er, no, it's—that doesn't bother me. I don't mind helping out with things like that. What exactly are you having trouble with?"

Pete crossed the room and plopped down, spreading his paper out. "The calculations. I don't understand it. Lily wasn't real sure either. But I mean, it's not real so why do we hafta understand the calculations?"

"Technically speaking nobody knows if it's real or not," Remus said. "That is why it is a theory."

Sirius snorted. "Very bloody unlikely. Come on. The sun is the source of magic?"

"Not just our sun," Remus argued. "All stars. Every single star out there, when they're alive, radiates magic."

"And the moon is an amplifier?"

"All moons are amplifiers, in the theory."

Sirius gave Remus a look. "So that's why you turn until a wolf? The sun throws off magic rays and the moon magnifies them onto you?"

Peter jerked at that. "Don't be rude—"

"I'm not," Sirius said, but looked a little doubtful.

Remus shrugged, picking at a loose thread of his blanket. "It's a theory. And, as I said, nobody can say for sure whether it's real or not. It's very unlikely and honestly sounds very ridiculous to me. But then again, it is interesting how the full moon does affect magical properties. That some ingredients need to be picked under a full moon, or some potions made under a full moon. Or," he added bitterly, "some people turning into wolves under the full moon. Actually… Spellwhether's Theory would explain why it's not simply the full moon that turns me."

"Wait, what do you mean by that?" Peter asked, confused. "The full moon does though."

"Er, yes, but—well, it's more than that. It's dependent on the amount of light coming from the moon. If it was exactly when the full was completely full it would only last for a few moments. Instead, it matches up to most things you do under a full moon and that's when it is very close to full—enough that it looks it." He plucked the thread free and began balling it up between his fingers, wondering if that was it.

Magic coming off of stars was weird but there were a lot of weird things going on in the wizarding world.

"You really believe this?" Sirius asked, sounding a little shocked.

"No," Remus grumbled. "Thinking a theory is interesting and fascinating is a far cry from believing it. Thinking something is a possibility does not mean I believe it."

Sirius held up his hands a little defensively. "All right, all right."

Remus mumbled an apology for sounding grouchy then bent forward, doing his best to help Peter with the theoretical calculations. He had to explain about imaginary numbers and variables, while Pete complained that using letters in mathematical equations was unfair.

"If we don't know the number, why should we bother trying to figure this out?!" he wailed, throwing his quill down.

"Trying to figure out answers to questions we don't know is a common issue we need to deal with," Remus said.

Peter wrote down 'ten' and folded his arms. "That's my answer."

"Ten."

"Ten," he confirmed.

"You do realize Professor Spring is looking for something more in the millions or billions, right?"

Peter shook his head. "Ten. I'll fail this assignment. I don't care."

Remus opened his mouth to argue, to tell Peter he should at least try, but then slowly closed his mouth. Peter looked on the verge of quitting school and going to live in a mud hut. "All right," he said gently. "If you need any more help, let me know. Even if it's to do with the moon. I'm okay with that."

"Yeah, okay, I just wasn't real sure, you know?"

Remus smiled at Peter's compassion. "That means a lot to me, thank you."

That evening, however, when he started working on the Astronomy assignment he found that it was more difficult than he anticipated. He stayed up late, scribbling equations and scratching them out. Nothing seemed right. He chewed his lip, feeling rather frantic as the clock ticked on. It was one problem!

At two in the morning he slid out of bed, snuck into James's desk and stole a bar of chocolate. He needed energy. He crept back into his bed and ate the entire bar in two bites, before returning to trying to work on the problem. He rubbed his eyes, trying to stay awake as the hour hand clicked to three.

It wasn't due until Monday night, but he couldn't sleep until he got it right. It shouldn't be this hard!

He was surrounded by papers and his hands smudged in ink when it turned four. He felt dizzy with exhaustion and had to get up in two and a half, three hours. Three and a half if he skipped most of breakfast and only ate a couple of pieces of toast on the way to Potions.

Finally sometime around four-forty-five he figured it out. Triumphantly, he wrote the answer before collapsing back and falling asleep. He woke up two hours later when his alarm went off and when he jerked awake, he knocked over the bottle of ink he had left open.

"No!" he cried out as it spilled out all over his blanket and legs. A great big splotchy mark spread on his bare ankle. Worse, the ink also spread over half his notes. Including the one with the answer.

"Remy?" His curtains twitched open and James peered in. "Bloody hell what happened? Did your satchel explode?"

Nearly in tears, he gathered up the papers. "Homework."

"What time did you get to sleep?" Remus shrugged, shifting the dripping papers over in order to gather up the blanket. "Are… you… okay?"

"Yes, fine."

"You don't look—"

"I'm fine!" He slid out of bed, yanking the blanket off, leaving a trail of ink as he shoved it into the laundry basket. It was his biggest bottle of ink, too. A waste of money.

"You have—"

"Please, I need to—to get ready."

James backed up. "Sorry."

After making sure he didn't need help, the other Marauders left for breakfast. Remus did his best to clean up the floor and as much as his ankle and hands as possible before throwing on his uniform, grabbing his satchel, and starting to leave—that's when he remembered he hadn't switched his books out. Swearing, he dumped his satchel out on his bed and repacked it for Friday's classes.

It was seven-thirty by the time he reached the Great Hall. Several students stared at him as he ran to his friends but he didn't think anything of it until he noticed them staring too.

"What?" He looked down to make sure his uniform was on properly. His tie was crooked and wrinkled but otherwise his attire seemed fine.

"Did you look in a mirror?" Sirius asked.

"Eh, no, I didn't have time." He reached up, trying to smooth his hair down. "Is it that bad?"

"Not your hair, mate," James said. "Well. Not exactly."

Peter held up a clean spoon and Remus could see his reflection and all the inky streaks on his face. There were some in his hair, too. Any semblance of energy he had left drained, and he dropped his head on the table. Either skip breakfast to clean up or keep the mess and eat.

After a few seconds he lifted his head and reached for some food, too hungry to skip. Oh well. At least his friends didn't comment on his decision, though James offered to try to help on the way to Potions. Before Remus could ask him what he meant, James pointed his wand at his face.

"Scourgify!"

"We haven't—" he started but then his mouth was filled with a disgusting taste of soap. He began coughing and gagging, spitting out vaguely sudsy saliva. "Haven't—learned—" He gagged again and doubled over.

"Errrr, I thought it would work!" James protested, seizing his arm. "Tell Sluggy we'll be there in a minute."

With that James dragged Remus into the nearest bathroom in time for him to throw up. He didn't get to the toilet, though, and threw up all over the floor. The vile soapy taste remained coating his mouth and he retched again, this time nothing coming out.

"Shit. Oh, Merlin, I didn't mean this, sorry!" James said, rushing around to get damp towels. "I thought it would work!"

"Using it—on faces—fills their—mouth with—soap!" He staggered over to the sink to try to rinse his mouth out. Once he finally got rid of the taste he straightened up, wiping his mouth off on his sleeve. "Didn't your parents ever do that to you as a punishment for saying bad things?"

James was mopping up the floor and glanced up, his glasses sliding down his nose. "No? My parents never punished me for anything."

Of course.

"Did your parents do that?"

"Hmm?"

James tossed the paper towels into the rubbish bin and got new ones; Remus got some as well, getting down to help. "Using that spell on your mouth as punishment."

"Yes, of course," Remus answered. "Well, my father did. My mother couldn't." He noticed James looking a little stricken. "What?"

"That sounds awful."

Remus frowned. "It's a common enough punishment for both wizards and Muggles. I've read it in loads of books."

James grinned. "What, Muggles? Using the spell?"

"No, no. They use physical bars of soap."

His nose crinkled. "Ugh. It is awful, isn't it? Barbaric."

Remus kept his mouth shut. Besides, they were done cleaning up. They both washed their hands then James grabbed his arm, dragging him off to Potions, promising he had a plan. As soon as they went into the classroom, Professor Slughorn opened his mouth to berate them about being so late.

"Sorry!" James laughed. "I had to empty my cauldron and I figured it'd be better to do it down a loo instead of all over the floor of the classroom, especially considering what I had for breakfast. You see, this morning I ate—"

Slughorn quickly held his hand up. "I have no interest in hearing what you consumed this morning, Mr. Potter. Just… sit down, both of you. And ten points from Gryffindor for your shockingly untidy appearance, Mr. Lupin."

Remus ducked his head as he followed James to where the Marauders sat. He could hear giggles and snickers, and Snape especially was giving him an amused look. As soon as he sat down, Slughorn came over and handed him a damp handkerchief.

"Clean up your face," Slughorn said, his voice not entirely harsh.

As Slughorn continued his lecture, Remus wiped off his face. A lot of ink came off and when he peered into the reflection of a set of scales, he saw his face was mostly clean with only a few faint smudges left. After the lesson ended he returned the handkerchief to Slughorn, thanking him.

"Of course," Slughorn said, dropping the cloth into a drawer. "I'm glad you stayed behind, I did want to talk to you about something."

Remus, poised to leave, froze up. "Yes, sir?"

"It's about the Slug Club," Slughorn said, a pleasant smile under his twitching mustache. Remus's stomach sank. "I want to make sure you understand you have a standing invitation. Whenever you'd like to join, you're always welcome."

He shifted from foot to foot, feeling ill. This had been a point of slight contention between him and Slughorn the previous year, and it made him uncomfortable. There was something awkward about the fact Slughorn really wanted Remus. Instead of lightly thanking him and leaving, Remus instead blurted out, "Does James have a standing invitation too?"

Slughorn's eyebrows shot up. "Beg pardon?"

"James. You wanted him too, didn't you?"

"Er." Slughorn smoothed down his mustache. "Mr. Potter has made it very clear he has no desire to join the Slug Club."

"So have I, sir," Remus found himself saying, regretting it immediately.

"Yes, but you're the one I want. To join the Slug Club, I mean," he quickly added, as smoothly as he could. Remus felt an inward flinch. "You know, we're having a Halloween party. On the twenty-sixth. We're going to have the Skeleton Crew playing!"

The Skeleton Crew was a new rock band, just beginning to become popular. Remus thought Lily would like that, since she wouldn't be able to go see the Hufflepuffskeins.

"Think about it, and let me know. You can bring a girl with you."

Another inward flinch. A girl. "Could I bring one of—James or Sirius or Peter?" he inquired.

Slughorn kept his face impassive. "Of course, whatever you're comfortable with."

"I—I'll think about it, sir," he lied. "Thank you. I really should get going to History—"

"Yes, yes, of course." Slughorn stood up, walking Remus to the door. "I'm glad you're thinking about it, Mr. Lupin. I'd really like to see you there."

Remus mumbled something incoherent and quickly left, feeling squiggly all over. He dove into his friends, relishing the feeling of their bodies around him. They asked what took so long and he explained about the party. Naturally, James immediately started talking about pranking the party, and Remus followed his friends, letting James's voice wash the discomfort away from his body.

-x-

Friday night Remus stayed up far later than he intended, mostly playing games with the other Marauders and working on the sound spell prank James wanted to do (even though it was probably going to get him killed). He had found the information needed and it was a fifth year spell, which meant a lot of work for Remus. Plus he worked on the Astronomy problem a little, which wasn't as difficult as the first time since he remembered how to do most of it.

Still, he was exhausted when he woke up after only a couple of hours of sleep again, and lay in bed wondering why he was awake at this hour. It was Saturday. He could sleep in.

Regulus.

Oh yeah, they had their first tutoring session at nine. Remus rolled over, peering at his clock. Eight. Why the hell did Regulus want to meet so early? he wondered grouchily as he got out of bed, resisting the urge to try to sleep another half hour. Nobody else in the dorm was awake so Remus got ready as quietly as possible.

After a quick breakfast, Remus was in the room they were supposed to meet in a good twenty minutes early. After stretching a bit, he worked a little more on the sound spell until the door opened.

Regulus stepped in, a look of irritation on his face and an aura of one radiating from his body. He shut the door a little loudly and then stood there, staring blankly at Remus.

"Good m-morning," Remus said nervously, standing up. He still wasn't entirely sure about Sirius's brother, didn't really have a good idea of what kind of person he was. Besides having an obvious distaste for half-and-halfs.

"Good morning," Regulus replied, pleasantly albeit a little stiffly.

"Er. Congratulations on your—um—the um, getting reserve," he stammered out.

Regulus raised his eyebrows. "It's only reserve."

"It's st-still neat, isn't it?"

"I suppose."

Remus tried not to roll his eyes, deciding that being friendly obviously wasn't the correct route. "Right—"

"Look, this was his idea, not mine," Regulus interrupted. "I have no interest or desire in a tutor. It won't do me any good, at any rate."

"Why not?"

Finally he moved, coming farther into the room and brushing the dust off a chair before sitting down. "Because my issue is with something that can't be helped."

"You wanted m-my help before."

Regulus simply shrugged. "That was then, this is now."

Remus sat down again as well. "How about you t-tell me the problem and we go from there? Before you said you had trouble with wandwork. Spells. Is that still the problem?"

Regulus gave him a rather withering look. "It's none of your business."

"As your tutor—"

"Which I didn't want." Regulus inspected his fingernails, his jaw muscles very tense. "Sirius poked his nose into my business. I didn't ask for this, I didn't want this. He shoved it onto me, as I guess he shoved it onto you as well. He's like an enormous snowball rolling down a hill. Either you get out of the way, or you get caught up into it."

That was an unfortunately good description of Sirius, but Remus wasn't going to take the bait. "Incendio."

"Pardon?"

He gave a shrug. "Incendio. Melt the snowball."

Regulus blinked. "Are you suggesting I set fire to my brother?"

"No, I'm suggesting there are ways around problems besides the obvious. Please don't set fire to Sirius," he added as an afterthought.

"You can melt a giant snowball barreling towards you in time?" Regulus inquired, sounding amused.

"Or use a barrier spell to stop it, or blow a hole through the center," Remus said. "There are lots of ways around—or through—a giant snowball barreling towards you."

Regulus leaned forward, a tight smile on his lips. "But wouldn't that fall under the category of getting out of the way?"

Remus frowned. "It's completely different than simply jumping out of—"

"It's the same thing, in different words. Now." He sat back, folding his arms. "Are you going to tutor me, or what?"

The rest of the session went about as infuriating as the beginning. Regulus was obstinate, stubborn, and refused to do much. When he did perform spells, he complained bitterly about how he didn't understand how this would help. Remus did everything he could to help. He adjusted Regulus's wide, wobbly movements as best he could and showed him multiple times how to do the movements, but Regulus's spells were weak, ineffective, almost like he was just beginning to learn the spell even if it was one he learned the previous year. Regulus shot out sarcastic remarks, and Remus gave equally sarcastic responses.

The second Regulus's watch chimed that it was ten, he tucked his wand in its holder, grabbed his bag, and left without another word.

"Yeah, you're welcome," Remus muttered, grabbing his own satchel.

He peeked into the Great Hall before going back to the tower and when he saw the other Marauders, he trotted in, trying his best to keep a smile on his face when Sirius asked how it went.

"I don't think he likes me too well," he said as cautiously as he could. "But he stayed for the hour."

Sirius smiled. "Thank you, Remus."

His heart began fluttering uncomfortably, and all irritation from dealing with Regulus faded. "Er, it—it's fine, I don't mind. I just hope he's willing to continue."

"I'm sure he will."

Remus poked his food, pushing the potatoes around his plate. "If he doesn't want to, he doesn't have to. I know you're trying to help him," he added when Sirius opened his mouth, "but it is his decision, and you shouldn't… push him."

Sirius pressed his lips thin. "Mmm."

There was some awkward tension in the air which James tried to clear by jumping in with prank ideas. He leaned over the table, whispering to Remus about trying out the sound spell, then he switched the conversation just as quickly to the probability of going to Fort Dragon.

"We've only been once this month," he complained, settling back into his seat.

"What a shame, we've only been in the Forbidden Forest once," Peter muttered and James elbowed him, pointing out Peter liked the spot. "I do. But it's still scary to get there and back again."

"A Hobbit's tale."

Everyone stared at Remus.

"Er, a—a book—it's—it's—never mind."

"Something nerdy," Sirius put in and Remus slowly nodded. "I'm up for Fort Dragon, unless we want to go swimming…?"

"I like Fort Dragon," Remus said quickly, not wanting to swim.

"Or—wait." James held up his hand, his eyes shining. "Way-way-way-wait a minute. Idea. Formalizing. Idea. Brilliantizing. Yes. Yes. Yes!" He grinned. "What if we watch a film?"

Sirius and Peter both looked excited while Remus shook his head, wanting to know how James expected them to do that. "We don't have any way to do so."

James looked triumphant. "We do if we sneak into the Muggle Studies classroom."

"No—"

"Yes," Sirius cut Remus off. "That sounds brilliant! I want to see another film; that was so neat. I mean, the story was a little weird and boring but I'm sure Lewis has some of the more interesting ones that Pete's told us about."

"No—" Remus tried again.

"She's got to have loads of films," Peter interrupted.

"There we go. Let's break in and watch a film."

All three of them looked happily at Remus. "Can I speak now? All right, thank you. Do any of you know how to use a projector? No? I didn't think so."

"You know how to, right, Pete?" James asked eagerly.

Peter shrank back a little, shaking his head. "No, I've never used something like that. Sorry."

"We're likely to ruin the projector," Remus continued. "We'd be in so much trouble."

Nobody spoke for a moment or two, all three of them looking rather disappointed. Remus figured that would be that but just then Lily strolled into the Great Hall.

Sirius jumped up. "She probably knows!" He scrambled over the bench and threw himself at Lily who jumped back, eyes huge. "LILY! My lovely, beautiful, perfect angel of a friend—"

"No," she said.

Sirius grabbed her hands and dropped to his knees, ignoring the fact everyone in the Great Hall was watching them. Lily's face went a little red. "Beautiful flower, kind, sweet angel of my heart—"

"Oh, hell no—"

"You don't even know what I want!"

She snatched her hands away. "No, but with a lead up like that it must be bad!"

She tried to walk around him but Sirius flung himself in front of her feet and she nearly tripped over him. "Can we talk? Oh, I can see up your skirt—"

She screeched and leapt away, face definitely red now. "SIRIUS BLACK!"

Sirius got back to his feet, looking very apologetic. "I didn't mean to! I was laying myself prone before you, I didn't think about the fact I'd be able to see." He paused. "I didn't look much."

She slapped him hard and stormed on, nearly knocking him over as she went. Sirius rubbed his cheek as he skulked back to his seat.

"What kind of knickers was she wearing?" James asked.

Sirius opened his mouth to answer but Remus had his wand out, pointing right at Sirius's face. "Try me," he warned. Sirius's mouth clamped back shut and he shook his head. "Good boy." Remus put his wand away.

"I'm not a dog."

"Your name is Sirius, isn't it?"

Sirius narrowed his eyes. "I hate you."

"Well if Remus doesn't want to risk maybe breaking the projector," James said in an annoyed tone, "I suppose that means breaking into the classroom and watching films is out of the case. How about some swimming, then?"

Remus looked up into James's sparkling eyes, knowing instantly that James knew Remus didn't want to swim, didn't want to learn to swim. He was trying to blackmail Remus into breaking into the Muggle Studies classroom, the swine.

"Fine," Remus said.

James hesitated, the sparkles fading into disappointment. "You want to go swimming?"

"I'll go swimming." He'd rather risk his own life than destroy a probably very expensive piece of equipment owned by a teacher.

Unfortunately, that meant half an hour later he was standing at the edge of the Prefects' bathtub, his toes digging into the tile as he stared at the lapping water. The other three were already in the water, splashing each other and shrieking with laughter. Slowly he sank down, dipping his feet into the warm water, ignoring them calling for him to jump in.

Gritting his teeth, he slid in, his shirt billowing up around him. He pushed the fabric down until it clung to his skin then hung onto the edge of the tub, refusing to move until Peter swam over and encouraged him to let go of the edge. Pete took hold of one of his arms and began swimming (albeit a little awkwardly, not being as good a swimmer as James) while dragging Remus with him. Remus kicked probably a little too violently and flailed one arm to try not to drown. It was made worse when he realized Myrtle was perched on top of one of the stalls, watching the four of them with interest.

"Usually people are naked when they're in the bathtub," she said when she noticed Remus saw her.

Peter let go of Remus, choking loudly, being very startled by a female voice in the room. Remus began panicking at not having anyone to hold him up, and splashed wildly until his head went under the water. He tried to remember how to float but no matter how he twisted his body it didn't seem to work.

Someone seized him, yanking him back up. James, of course.

"You ought not to spy on boys in the lavatory!" James snapped.

"I can't see anything," she said innocently, swinging her legs. "Although your bathing costume is a lot… less fabric than they were for men in my day." She eyed James's bare chest rather appreciatively. "If you were using this room for what it was intended, I wouldn't be watching."

"Yeah, right," Sirius muttered.

Myrtle floated upward, stretching her arms out. "I don't understand why boys are so funny about being seen by someone dead. It's not like I can do anything."

"IT'S THE PRINCIPLE OF THE THING!" James shrieked, letting go of Remus who began to sink again until James took his arm again, yanking. "Merlin's toes, Remy, can't you float at all?"

"No."

"I couldn't swim either," Myrtle said, flying above them, eyes still locked on James's chest.

James glared at her. "And now you spend your time swimming in toilet pipes, is that right?"

Myrtle puffed up. "You don't need to be so rude about it!"

"Look, when I'm a ghost I sure as hell won't be wasting my time haunting people taking shits—"

"OH! YOU'RE AWFUL! YOU'RE SO MEAAANNN!" Myrtle wailed and with a little flip she dove into one of the stalls, leaving a little splash behind.

James began hauling Remus back to the side of the tub. "Let me guess, you're going to give me a lecture on how rude I was?"

Remus gratefully clung to the edge of the tub. "Not when she was in here while we were using the bathroom, even if we are clothed," he said, shivering a little. "Well that was quite a workout, I'll just sit here—"

"You barely did anything!"

Remus scrambled until his feet found enough hold to get him onto the tiles. "Sorry, I couldn't hear you, what was that?"

James rolled his eyes. "Sneak."

Remus happily sat up with his legs in the water. "Learned from the best, Jimsy."

James stuck his tongue out before splashing back to the other two.