I would, firstly, like to thank you all for every single review left. I know a lot of you had questions that I was waiting for a chapter like this to answer and assure you that the plot line is about to thicken. Not all can remain so perfect in poor Rose's world. Secondly, I would like to say that I hope everyone is staying safe and warm through this winter storm. I know the North was particularly hit and as someone in the Midwest, outside is a nasty cold and wind is blowing sideways. I also want to thank you all for the well wishes and condolences. The grief isn't as sharp as it was at the start and I'm finding having another story to work on is helping to get the cogs moving. My family is recovered, but as a mother of three and not really afforded any time to rest, I persist! I am feeling much better though. I hope you enjoy the following chapter! Please let me know what you think.
Rose's POV -
Something inside of me has shifted. As expected, letting loose that I'd fallen in love with Dimitri moved something inside of me. Something that scared me, while being absolutely exhilarating at the same time. My heart was officially in the open and completely unguarded. I trusted Dimitri with something I haven't given to anyone since my mother destroyed it. He had my unadulterated trust. I'd spoken words that I hadn't spoken since I was 8 years old. It feels like I've placed my soul into his hands. Sighing at the fire the thought ignites in me, I try for the hundredth time to focus on my study guide for my math test. A part of me knows it's useless. I haven't been able to focus on practically anything in almost two weeks. Ever since I declared my love, I've been absolutely hopeless.
Frowning, I shut my math binder in frustration. How the feeling of his body over mine or of the way he looks at me should have anything to do with graphing quadratic equations is beyond me. Getting up I make short work of trying to distract myself from the urge to sneak into Dimitri's room for the 14th night in a row. My poor bed had seen less of me than I had my mother these last two weeks. I needed to set boundaries. It couldn't be healthy to want to crawl into someone every waking moment. Stretching, I feel myself start to move and realize that it's impossible. I knock on his bathroom door and smile shamefully when he opens it.
"I can't focus on my homework." I complain to him. He raises an eyebrow, before his eyes darken with understanding. "I'm going to go mad."
His hands reach out and tug me into his room and onto his bed without any words. Opening my legs automatically I shiver when his body slides between them with practiced ease. Hands grip my hips as his lips settle over mine. Moaning, I let him distract me from my current frustration. It's almost comical at how fast he has me naked and withering against his mouth as he lavishes attention between my legs. The feeling of it all making my skin flush and the air around us feels electrified. My fingers entangle in his hair as I arch my back against the onslaught of my impending orgasm. As if sensing what was coming, his arms move to hook around my thighs to hold me in place. Moaning I smother my face into one of his pillows when I feel the world tugged from my senses.
It takes me forever to find my place amongst reality again. Lifting my head I find him sliding my shorts back on and I sit up to put on my shirt. He leans down and kisses me before pulling back to smile at me. My heart leaps in my chest and get onto my knees to pull him back down into another kiss.
"You're never going to get any work done if you work yourself up again." He chuckles into my neck after he pulls away from my lips.
"I don't think I'll ever stop being worked up." I groan frustrated again. "You're all I can focus on and I'm starting to feel like Crazy Clingy Carrie."
"Who?" He asks, confused.
Sitting down in the middle of his bed I push my hair back and give him an exasperated look.
"Crazy Clingy Carrie!" I throw my arms up. "She was a girl at one of the schools I went to. She was this honor roll student. Totally Harvard bound and then she fell head over heels for some chess team member. Next thing you know it's like she's been surgically attached to him and all her grades plummeted. By the end of the year she was knocked up and couldn't see a problem not having every waking moment taken up by a chess nerd. As for Harvard? Forget about it. Last I heard she lives in a trailer in back woods Missouri."
"Roza." He says disapprovingly. "There is nothing wrong with being good at chess. It's rude to call people nerds. There's also nothing wrong with trailers."
"That's seriously all you took away from that?!" I stare at him in amazed disbelief.
"Be serious Roza." He says, shaking his head at me.
"I am!" I exclaim as loudly as I can without anyone outside the room hearing me.
"You're too smart and too determined to flunk out of school." He says sitting on the bed next to me. "I think you're being too hard on yourself. You won't be dropping out of school to give birth in a trailer."
The amusement in his voice is almost contagious, but something needs to give. I finally let him see how distressed I actually am.
"Dimitri, I can't focus." I tell him. "All I want to do is curl into you. Not even sexually…all the time. I want to spend every waking moment with you and it's starting to feel unhealthy."
He doesn't say anything and I'm afraid I've offended him, but I needed him to know it wasn't him.
"I can't think of anything, but you all day. I'm missing questions in class. I can't focus on my homework, because all I want to do is…" I break off with a blush. He knew exactly what I wanted to do instead of homework. "I spend every moment I can in this room. I haven't slept in my bed in two weeks!"
I meet his eyes and blush in shame.
"I feel like my every thought and action involves you. I don't feel like an independent person anymore and that's not even the part that scares me. It's that I don't care if I'm becoming that way. That's the scary part." I feel a frown lodge itself on my face. "I love you, but I don't want to become that girl whose whole life is consumed by a guy."
Reaching out I'm pulled to straddle his lap as he pushes hair back from my face. I lean forward and kiss him in hopes of washing away any hurt that my words might've done. Pulling away he holds waist.
"I hear you." He says, causing relief to rush through me. "It's intense."
"Yes." I breathe out in relief that he actually heard my concerns.
"It's normal." He nuzzles my neck and I sigh with content. "It's called the honeymoon period and, while I can't speak for Crazy Clingy Carrie, it passes."
"When?" I moan out. His nuzzles had turned into small suctioning kisses. "I have a study guide due next week and all I can think of is this."
I tug at his hair to emphasize my point. I feel him smirk against my skin and I feel him harden between my legs.
"It shouldn't be long." His reassurance settles my nerves. "You don't have to worry about becoming my love crazed zombie. Plus I can't imagine Rose Independent Hathaway letting anyone get in her way."
"You think you're so funny." I murmur to him as I push him backwards onto the bed. I reach into his pants and draw out his length, giving it a couple of strokes.
"Honestly Roza." He moans with his head thrown back. I stop stroking and he continues. "You are one of the most independent and determined people I know. Please don't get discouraged."
Finally, completely pleased, I stop briefly to pull down my shorts before sliding down and over him.
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The honeymoon period seemed to have no end, but determined to do something other than oggle Dimitri all day, I forced myself to change up my habits. Now that Lisa had hired Mason, I was able to get off of work earlier at night. So I forced myself to stay and play games or study with Eddie until closing. At home I did my homework in the kitchen across from Dimitri as he did his lesson plans or was grading things. I'd even forced myself to find something to do on weekends to keep myself from spending the entire two days being repeatedly drilled into Dimitri's mattress.
Staring up at the ceiling of my bedroom, I spread my mind over the other concerns of my relationship with Dimitri. Even though we were only strictly affectionate in the privacy of our bedrooms, the fear that someone was going to find out about our forbidden romance weighed heavily on me. I felt like we were dancing along the finest of lines between glaringly obvious and invisible. As is, we'd already had two run-ins that sent Abe into a suspicion. Plus there was the fact that no matter how secretive we'd tried to be, Yeva was there to let me know that she knew everything. Any doubts of her "sight" had been blown away when she complimented me on my forethought to take birth control pills.
I tried to explain it was more to do with how unhealthy I was affecting my regularity of my cycle for so long. Now that I was regular on my own and Dimitri and I had a healthy sex life I didn't see any issues continuing taking them. The last thing I needed was a baby. Rolling onto my side I frown at the wall. My thoughts don't stop. Eventually, it was only a matter of time, someone was going to find out and my whole life would, once again, be turned upside down. I try not to let the thought depress me. Getting up I make my way downstairs to grab some water when I meet Abe walking through the front door.
"Hey kid." He says mockingly. I frown at him. "Someone seems a little grouchy. Everything alright?"
"I've just got a lot on my mind." I shrug him off and continue into the kitchen.
It wasn't a lie. Between school, work, and trying to stay social enough to hide my secret relationship, I felt like my mind was never empty. I pour myself a glass of water and try to ignore the way he was seated at the table watching me.
"I feel like we haven't really talked to each other since the phone call that freaked you out." He says bluntly. His goal must've been achieved, because the mere mention of the call makes me physically flinch. "I think you should sit down and we should talk about it."
"I don't want to talk about it." I tell him evenly, hiding the fact that my mind is trying to figure out how coming down for water ended here.
"You can tell everyone else around here that, but it's not going to fly with me." His tone rings with finality and I bristle at it. "Don't test me kid. I could always go around you and find out that way instead. I'm asking to do this with you in mind."
"Why can't you just leave it alone?" I ask, feeling cornered. I eye the doorway, calculating the odds of him following me if I walk away.
"One of these days I promise to tell you." He looks so serious I can't help but believe him, and I know for a fact that he will definitely follow me.
"Mom…she had an old boyfriend." I sit down and stare at the table. Abe says nothing. "He was a nasty piece of work…and it was him on the phone."
Lifting my eyes, I find a calm facade, but I feel my body tense. It was under the facade I could see wheels turning. Something about the man in front of me screamed dangerous if provoked and my flight instincts were screaming in response. I take a sip of my water when his eyes glide over my face.
"What did he say?" His voice was low.
"Rose." I tell him simply. "I hung up afterwards."
His eyes don't seem confused. My answer spoke volumes to him. His gaze sharpens on me and I can see all the things sliding through his head. A large part of me reverently hopes he doesn't land on the right one. I hold his eyes and try to give nothing away as I wait for one of the billion damaging things he could possibly ask, all while hoping he'll drop the subject now that I've answered his question.
"Did he touch you?" He asks.
"Of course not. It was just a phone call." I try to joke away the real intent of his question.
"I'm not one to beat around the bush Rose." He says firmly. "Don't make me lay it out."
I don't know how to answer. While never getting to advance physically, there were ways that most people don't know could "touch" you. I force myself to keep my breathing as evenly as possible and I look down at the table as I try to come up with the right answer. Any answer to stop what I'm sure will be a line of questioning that might unhinge the reality I've locked away. Looking back up I meet his eyes and see fearful anticipation. Shock moves through me. While I'm absolutely positive that Abe Mazur feared nothing, for some reason my answer holds him on edge.
"He didn't rape me." I say slowly.
"That doesn't mean he didn't touch you." I can hear the storm behind his words and I nod feeling like any moment I could flee.
I want to tell him that what actually happened seems so small when in words to someone that's not paying attention. I want to tell him his wandering hands never got to venture past my thighs when he made me sit next to him at the table. I want to tell him that sometimes he simply made me sit on his lap to watch cartoons, and that he always had his hand on my stomach at that time. The thumb of that hand was always stroking. Simple, everyday touches that Dimitri and I do on the daily. Not that I'd tell him anything involving Dimitri and I. I make myself stop thinking in worry that once open, everything might slip through the door.
Anger aimed at Abe rises. I don't want to think of this. I don't want to answer any of these questions. I just want to be left alone! Taking a deeper breath I shove down the lid on all of my emotions and take a moment to shove everything back behind the door in my mind, before I answer.
"Others had it so much worse." My voice is absolutely devoid of emotion as I lay the answer on the table.
He flinches at the suddenness of my shutdown. Alarm flaring up in his eyes, while his face smooths out to appear calming. His fingers twitch slightly and I stand back up. He doesn't move and instead choose to look at the table.
"I'm going for a run." I tell him, pulling my gaze from his face and focusing on the floor. "It's been a while. If you see Olena, tell her I'll be back for dinner."
With that I escape from the kitchen and up the stairs as fast as I can. I'm like a whirlwind as I change into running clothes and fling myself from the house. I can feel panic trying to take over me and force it out through my exercise. My focus stays on the sidewalk in front of me and I try not to think about anything other than the sound of my feet touching the concrete beneath me.
Dimitri's POV -
"Rose runs in the mornings before school. She doesn't just take off in the middle of the afternoon on a Saturday." Mama's tense voice is the first thing I hear when I walk through the door. I listen in attention as I take over my coat. "That means she's upset. Was she upset when you saw her?"
The topic being about Rose sinks in and I quietly make my way to stand in the doorway of the kitchen. Mama stands by the sink looking concerned and Abe sits at the kitchen table. Abe is silent for a long moment and I feel the tension in the room go up a notch.
"She wanted to run off some energy after our talk." Abe's statement has alarm blasting through me instantly and I see it all over Mama as well.
"What did you guys talk about?" Mama doesn't beat around the bush, but Abe stays silent.
I finally walk into the kitchen and make my way into Abe's line of vision. His body tenses and I stare at him blankly. I want to know what happened. I can feel my protectiveness for Rose flood through me.
"I asked her about the phone call a couple of weeks ago." He says smoothly.
"You know she didn't want to say anything about it." Mama is exasperated, but is too focused on Abe ignoring her wish to see the flash of anger under his calm exterior.
My body tenses and my senses sharpen at the flash. Whatever Rose's response had been was enough to put him on edge. Anything that put him on edge was concerning, not even including Rose in the equation. Abe is sitting on something and whatever it was upset her enough to run from the house. I don't waste time jumping in.
"What did she say?" I feel the tension seeping into my tone. Mama glances at me, concern for someone other than Rose setting in.
Abe acts like he's straightening out his scarf and every alarm in my body starts screaming. He's hiding something big and depending on the answer, shit is going to hit the fan.
"That's between my daughter and I." He says arrogantly.
"Wrong answer." I say as I yank him from the table and hold onto him by his coat.
"Dimitri!" Mama's horrified voice rings out in alarm and Abe grabs my wrists, anger blooming on his face.
"What did you say to her?!" I hiss, anger reverting me back to Russian.
"You better let me down boy."
The room fills with a dangerous feeling, but I ignore it and continue holding onto him. If he'd done anything awful, I would face 100 Abes. I tighten my grip on him and ignore Mama's demands to let him go.
"If you harmed her, I will bury your body where no one will find you." The threat is as truthful as they come and it registers in Abe's eyes. I watch as they flicker and then something else flickers as well. Suspicion.
"She said an old boyfriend of her mom's called." He hisses back at me. "Now put me down."
I shove away from him and he straightens out. I'm about to run after Rose, knowing she must be freaking out, but I see something else flash in his eyes. I feel my body puff up when I realize the conversation between them hadn't ended there. Mama shoves herself between the two of us and holds us both at arm length.
"Enough!" She demands.
"It won't be enough until he tells me what he did to her!" I can barely keep up with the storm raging inside of me, and even though I'm yelling, I stay where Mama wants me.
"Dimika!" Mama looks shocked at my behavior.
"He touched her. I know it." Abe finally says something and it silences us all.
Mama's arms fall and she shakes when she looks at him. Eyes wide with horror. She glances at me questioningly and then swings back to Abe. My heart thunders. Did he know? Was he exposing us? I keep my face even.
"The boyfriend." He spits seething. "She was hiding why the phone call would bother her so much, so I pushed. It was for her own good."
"My God." Mama is too stunned to speak English and I feel at a loss as to what to say for the moment.
"You said it yourself Olena. She was scared and it was taking a toll on her. We needed to know." He's pacing and I finally get to see an unhinged Abe. "She wouldn't give any details. She shut down on me, but I know that response. She was traumatized. He touched her. Some disgusting fucker touched my daughter!"
By the end of his rant he is booming. Rage billows off of him and the kitchen feels darker. I picture my Roza in my mind. I think of all the nightmares and the shadows that hide behind her eyes. How at some point she was subject to absolute horror. How old was she? Who was sick enough to… I feel sick at the thought of it all. Abe's answers threw me off the track of rage and into a land of dizzying concern for Rose. A loud slap sounds out in the room and my eyes take in Mama. Mama in all her glory.
"How dare you. How dare you!" Russian spews from her as she shoves at a shocked looking Abe. "You come into my home and corner her after I told you to drop it. You disrespected my wishes and now look what you have done!"
"What I've done?" Abe splutters in his own rage.
"You think I didn't know she had gone through something? You think I'm stupid?" There's no calming down Mama and she stabs her finger into Abe's chest. "Her mother abandoned her. She was skin and bones when I first got her. All she had was a trash bag of scraps! She screamed in her sleep for weeks. Of course there's more to the story, but that is for her to decide when to tell people. NOT FOR YOU TO FORCE OUT OF HER!"
"MAMA!" I exclaim as she starts shoving at him.
"She is fragile! A fragile child who needs absolute love and care!" Her shouting drew Yeva and Karolina. Both looked alarmed. "She needs to know she can feel safe and can trust the people around her! You cornered her. You took advantage of her progress. RUINED HER TRUST!"
"I AM HER FATHER!" He booms and I grab Mama's hips, ready to yank her away.
"You are nothing!" Mama is shrieking hysterically, even her native language hard to understand, as she shoves him towards the door. "You gave up your right to be anything to her! You let Janine fall into hell with a baby you refused to help raise and banished Rose to a life that I am trying to help her recover from. You didn't want her for 17 years and you don't get to change just because she's here. Hell you can't even tell her who you are? You want a parent for her, then here I am! I give her a home, food, clothes, protection, and the knowledge that I will always be here for her. I give her LOVE. I am her mother. MY CHILD! MINE!"
Abe falls into absolute silence. His whole face is a battle of emotions, but the respect/fear of Mama keeps him silent. The whole room is focused completely on Mama. Tears rush down her flushed face and her whole body shakes. Drawing in a deep breath she points to the door. Her silent command is undeniable and he makes no mistake in obeying it. Before the door closes he stops, but she's having none of it.
"Don't you come back to this house until you learn to respect my wishes and gain some sensitivity for Rose." She says it in clear English.
Shoulders tense, he leaves the house without another word. Letting go of Mama, I step back and wait for her to yell at me for causing the escalation. She doesn't look at any of us though. Instead she wipes at her face and heads off to her room. Karolina follows her quickly and I hear her bedroom door shut behind them. Rubbing at my face I feel stress hit me like a mack truck. I need to find Rose.
"No." Yeva gets in my way of the front door. She stares at me with conflicting emotions. "Leave her be."
I want to argue with her. Rose was out there, probably, running herself into the ground. God only knew what devils were chasing her and if Abe was right she was probably freaking out. I need to find her. To let her know that I'm here.
"She'll come to you later. Let her battle her monsters in peace." Yeva shows no sign of moving from the door and I know I'll be whacked if I disobey her.
Shoving everything down, I turn and make my way to my room.
Rose's POV -
I've been running for hours by the time I manage to bring myself back to the house. My muscles scream in anger as I take on the porch steps and my heart is still pumping like it's in the Olympics. Taking a moment to catch my breath I stare at the door and know there's a large possibility that Abe is somewhere inside the house. I close my eyes and bite back a groan, before ripping off the bandaid. The smell of dinner saturates the air and the smell does wonders to calm my anxiety. Heading into the kitchen everyone is serving their plates.
"It smells amazing in here!" I moan lightly as I pour myself some water. I swear I must've been very good in a past life to deserve this."
Turning around I smile around my water glass at the family. Sonya and Viktoria have already dug into the food, moaning in appreciation. Yeva hums in agreement. I feel my smile slide away at the tight smiles Olena, Karolina, and Dimitri have. Their eyes hide a mutual understanding of something.
"Is everything okay?" I ask, feeling anxiety starting to bleed into my tone.
"Everything is fine. We were just worried you'd be late for dinner." Olena says, her smile actually starting to seem more genuine. She looks at me and disapproval takes over. "How am I supposed to plumpen you up to a healthy teenager if you're going to run all my home cooking off?"
I take the plate she hands me and shove a piece of bread in my mouth, shrugging impishly. She raises her brow and I smile mischievously and lean next to Paul.
"What your babushka means is that she wants to make me so big that I won't be able to fit through the door." I say in a fake conspiratorial voice. "That way I can never leave her and she can continue to make me fat with her cooking and baking."
"You're so silly Aunt Rose!" He says in a fit of giggles.
"If I'm so silly then maybe I should get fat. Maybe we should cook you to eat next." I fake whisper.
"WHY ME!" He giggles even harder.
"Cause you're so cute….I COULD EAT YOU UP!" I pretend I'm eating his neck and soak in his laughter at the action.
The actions have everyone laughing and relaxing and I feel relief flood through me as the rest of the tension leaves the room. Sitting up I look around and find everyone distracted enough to sneak a wink to Dimitri. He smiles at me, but something serious lurks behind his eyes. He turns back to his food and I know I'll have to ask him later. The night continues as normal and I feel myself getting tired until I realize Dimitri is avoiding me. Frowning to myself I can't tell if we are fighting or if something is bothering him. I tell myself that if something is bothering him, he'll talk to me when we go upstairs. After dinner I push off finding out the answer and help clean up the kitchen before I trudge upstairs for a shower.
Dimitri's door is open and shows him on his bed reading a book. He doesn't look at me when he hears me come upstairs and I try not to frown. I purposely take my time taking my shower, hoping he would come join me. I let the hot water run over me as I shave my legs and spend longer than necessary washing my hair. Giving up waiting for him I shut the shower off and then repeat the same efforts of dragging out my actions when getting dressed. Frowning I feel the start of rejection slither through me and shut it down. It's only fair he gets time to himself. I've been making time for myself, so of course he should as well. When the thought does little to help my emotions I lay down.
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I am completely willing to admit I can be extremely impatient. Hours had passed and instead of sleeping, I could only go over this evening obsessively. The knowledge that something was off eating at me until all I could do is stare at the closet door. The urge to get up and crawl into his bed and push for an answer growing stronger than my need to respect his space. My stomach rolls at the thought of us fighting and not knowing the reason and irritation slithers through me. I groan knowing what's going to happen next.
"Wake up." My voice is strong as I kick the end of Dimitri's bed. He doesn't respond and I feel my irritation flare. "You and I both know that you've been awake since I walked through the bathroom door. So cut the shit and tell me what your fucking problem is."
"I'm tired Rose. We can talk about this later." He says, not bothering to sit up or even look at me.
"No, we're going to talk about this now." I stiffen when he still doesn't move.
"I had it all. I had it all and then it came crashing down." Mama's head rolls around and her eyelashes flutter.
"You're high mom." My voice is flat and I focus on my science book.
"It doesn't mean I'm not right." She drones. "You're young and pretty…ish. You just wait. It's only a matter of time before someone smiles at you and you fall into bed with him."
"Please, I'm trying to study. I have a huge exam on Monday." I get up and get a glass of water in an attempt to make her give up.
"You'll need to." She snorts. "Study away Rose. Try and escape your fate, cause just like your mother, you'll be left all alone too."
"Get up and have the decency to at least tell me why you can't look me in the eye." I feel my throat trying to clog. "Don't try to feed me some bullshit lie about talking later."
Sitting up, finally, he fixes me with a blank stare. I don't move an inch and fix him with a blank stare of my own. The memory of my mom pushes and pulls at my mind and I feel the answering anxiety whisper through me.
"I'm trying to give you space." He says evenly.
"Space for what?" I scoff as my heart plummets.
I'm trying desperately not to jump to conclusions. Years of my mother's poison fill my mind and grow louder. The resulting pain and panic start to tear at my edges. I force myself to breathe deeply as my heart rate picks up.
"Space to recover from your afternoon with Abe." He says it softly. It all comes to a screeching halt.
"He told you." It's not a question. I can finally see the tension behind his blank exterior.
"I wanted to give you space to give you peace. He ambushed you and forced you to talk about things you shouldn't have to relive."
"Stop it." My voice is hard as steel and he stops talking. "I'm fine. I went for a run and the only thing I want is to leave it alone and not talk about it again. I don't need you to give me space."
Something flashes in his eyes and I tilt my head. He looks away quickly, but not quickly enough and it dawns on me. My body is no longer stiff. No, it's trembling.
"Any other day all you can tell me is how much you love me. How you want us to be open with each other." I fight to keep my voice down. "I see that only counts when my top is off."
"That isn't true. We can always talk to each other." His accent gets heavier and he looks offended. "Don't say things like that."
"You told me I could tell you on my own time. When I AM ready." I emphasize. "You can't possibly be upset with me wanting to drop this instead of talking it out."
He avoids my eyes again and stays silent. Frowning, I decide I'm finished with this. I waste no time in stripping off my shirt. My sweats follow not two seconds later. His body straightens and his eyes swing to mine in immediate attention.
"What are you doing?" He asks in caution.
"So now you want to talk." I retort, eyes blazing.
"You're being ridiculous. Put your clothes on." He looks somewhere between exasperated and frustrated.
"So are you." I fire back.
"You need space." He insists and I shoot him a dirty look. "What Abe did was, I'm sure, upsetting for you. I want you to have time to yourself to move past it."
"You are so full of shit." The statement saturates the air. "You're the one who needs the space, not me. I went out, had myself a five hour run and that was that. What you want is for me to open up and pour out all of my thoughts and feelings about what happened and you don't want to be the bad guy for being upset at my lack of wanting to do that. The space is for you to lock it away instead of just being honest about how you feel."
"That's not true. " His attempts to stay calm and ignore the problem have me feeling wild. "Now put your clothes back on."
Our eyes lock and I feel like screaming, but I can't do that without the whole house hearing. If he thinks he's won this argument, he must be on drugs.
"You want space? You want me to put my clothes on? I'll get dressed and give you your space." I swoop down in one graceful move and snatch up my clothes. "I'll give you all the space you need and when you're ready to be truthful with yourself, you know where to find me. Until then, I assure you my clothes will be in no danger of coming off."
With the clear insinuation heavy in the room, I turn on my heel and sweep from the room with my head held high.
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Hardly three days have gone by and it didn't seem Dimitri and I were any closer to fixing things than before. To say it's awful is an understatement. Ignoring the fact that all I want to do is crawl into bed with him, car rides home from school, family dinners, and any interactions outside the classroom were now filled with a tense avoidance. That didn't include him still insisting on walking me home after work. Nothing like awkward silence for the 15 minutes it takes to get home. Speaking of the devil I watch Dimitri slide into the coffee shop and quickly look back down at the table.
"I think that we should think about cutting off the monkey bread muffins from the menu." I say, ignoring the feeling of eyes on my back. "We throw more away than sell. I was looking at some of the paperwork you printed up at the last meeting and, while it's not a huge loss, the shop is losing money having to buy the extra ingredients to make them."
So far, in the four months that I'd been working for Lisa, we've sat down one Sunday a month for a staff meeting. She felt it absolutely necessary to keep all of her employees in the loop and I could already see the advantage of it. While she runs the shop, the rest of us handle the customers and sales. Then during the meetings we are given the chance to explain our ideas for changes. Such as taking a menu item off or switching the news magazines we sell. I watch as Lisa looks at Mia and Mason and they both nod in agreement.
"So we'll take the monkey bread muffins off the menu and that will start first thing tomorrow." She furiously scribbles in her notebook. "Valentine's Day is in a week and, starting tomorrow, we'll start our Sweetheart Menu. I'll be making all of the pastries, but I'll be closing early so you guys can brush up on the drink making. Try to push the mocha raspberry latte. It's positively sinful."
Mia giggles and I raise my eyebrow when I see Mason get distracted by it. I'm glance back and find Dimitri's eyes. Flushing, I turn back around to find Lisa laying out an assortment of delicious looking pastries onto the table with multiple sample cups of drinks.
"Do we get to taste these?" Mia asks, shocked.
"Well I can't have you giving out recommendations if you haven't even tasted what we're selling." Lisa laughs. "Dig in!"
She doesn't need to tell me twice. Moaning in absolute pleasure I know I'll need to convince her to keep on the cream puffs. Mia and Mason look like they're about to bow at Lisa's feet. Fighting with a sudden thought I force myself to push aside my stubbornness and take an eclair and some coffee over to Dimitri. Frustration rises when he pretends to be enraptured with his book. Taking a deep breath, I set the items in front of him and walk back to the group without a word.
The rest of the night continues in the same way. After our taste test, Lisa closed the shop and we spent the next two hours making various sample sizes of the drinks and thoroughly working ourselves into a caffeine induced haze. It's not until Dimitri is helping me into my coat as I'm clocking out that I notice it's even time to go home. I feel myself tense and my muscles respond unhappily as we begin our walk home. Snow is falling again and I start to wonder when spring starts around here. While the inside of the house sparkled brand new after the social worker's visit, I've noticed the outside of the house could use a pick me up. Maybe I could make myself useful by putting some elbow grease into cleaning up outside.
"Sometimes I forget you're more mature than most girls your age." Dimitri's voice startles me and I fight not to jerk. He continues on, ignoring my response. "You were right. I was upset when you didn't choose to open up to me."
"I lived it once, I really don't want to live it again." I remark, kicking at some snow. "It's nothing against you."
"I know."
We fall back into silence, this one less uncomfortable than before. It isn't long before the house comes into view and I feel a hand grab my elbow. Stopping, I look up into his eyes and feel my heart flutter.
"I'm sorry Rose." While his apology is far from a novel, I can see the sincerity in his eyes.
"I could really use some hot chocolate." I tell him, smiling warmly. We barely make two steps before I make a promise I'm unsure I can keep. "I'll tell you one day…I promise."
Dimitri smiles softly at me and we continue into the house. Taking off my hat and scarf, I hang them up along with my bag. Before I can remove my coat I see Dimitri look around before dragging me into a quick kiss. My skin immediately warms in a way that has nothing to do with the house and I feel my heart quicken. After a week, even the small kiss felt like a lifetime of them and I can hardly keep the goofy grin off my face when he hastily retreats to the kitchen and leaves me alone in the doorway. Hanging up my coat, I'm stopped from entering the kitchen when the phone rings. I'm still smiling when I pick it up.
"Belikov residence." I giggle into the phone when I see Dimitri almost drop a mug at my voice.
"Rose."
The sound of a raspy man's voice has my heart pounding for a completely different reason. I turn away from the kitchen door and feel the smile fall off my face.
"I know it's you Rose. I gave you time to adjust to my first phone call, but you can't avoid talking to me forever." His voice slides over my skin like disgusting oil and I feel nausea rise quickly.
"There's no one here by that name." My voice sounds small and I feel shame rise in response.
"Oh little Rosie. What a liar you are." The chuckle on the other end threatens to drag me into the darkness of my memories. "You can pretend all you want, but sooner or later you will talk to me."
"You have the wrong number." This time panic is clear in my voice and before I can let anything else escape, I hang up.
I am desperately eager to start bringing in our conflict and thought this the perfect way to start bringing it into the plot. Please let me know what you think!