The Next Day

Jadzia sat motionless as she stared at the still image on the viewing screen in front of her. Major Kira had come by earlier that morning and provided her with access to Jadzia's…her personal logs. She figured it would be best to start at the beginning but an hour in she realized that most of Jadzias logs pertained to work, or something related to what seemed an abundance of friends and a few casual lovers, that is until a new member of the crew came aboard the station. She had liked Worf from day one and had spent so much time trying to get him to notice her. Listening to the logs had been very amusing, she had asked the computer to narrow the logs down to only those that specifically mentioned Worf and to her surprise only half of them disappeared. The time had seeped by as she learned more about their lives together. It was near 3pm when she finally opened the last log dated the day before her attack. She took a deep breath and prompted the computer to play the entry.

'I don't think it will be a long one tonight. Worf should be home soon, and I've been trying to work up the courage to talk to him about what's been on my mind these past few days. Something that I never even realized that I wanted. If this war has taught me anything it's that you can't wait until tomorrow to live your dream because tomorrow may never come. We only have today, this moment in time to do what makes us happy. I've lost a lot of friends, colleagues to this damn war and I think that until Alexander came; I never thought about living for today, it was always for tomorrow, a week or year from now. It was always after the war, that's when life could start again. I don't want to wait to start a family of our own. I just hope Worf will agree, he might think I'm being impulsive again and that it would be better to wait…but I can't, we can't…' off screen Worf's voice could be heard calling out to her. She briefly turned back to the screen and continued, 'Well here we go, hopefully I will have something wonderful to talk about next time. End log'.

The screen went black and Jadzia leaned back in her chair. The woman she was had never gotten the chance to live her dream of a having family, for her tomorrow never came. In many ways that Jadzia Dax had died and what was left paled in comparison to the dynamic personality of a ghost who looked just like her. It was at this moment that she realized what she had to do. She had to leave the station.

"Jadzia, this is quite a surprise. You are the last person I expected to walk through that door." Martok stood from his desk.

"I can imagine." She smiled nervously.

"Come, sit my daughter." The term of endearment was not lost on Jadzia. This elder Klingon obviously cared a great deal for whom she had been.

"Thank you."

"What can I do for you?"

"I was able to get access to Jadzia's…my personal logs. I certainly had a lot of opinions about things, people, You and a few others came up quite often, I saw you as someone who was the voice of reason when it came to my relationship with Worf. I considered you a close friend"

"We are more than friends, you and Worf are a part of my house, my family."

"Yes, Worf thinks a lot of you. I know I don't remember him or what we shared. But I see the way he looks at me, the love he feels and I…"

"Why are you here?"

"I've decided to leave, I haven't told him yet."

"Why not?"

"I wanted to talk to you first, to ask you…" Martok could hear the silent plea in her tone. She wanted him to stand by Worf.

"You need not speak on the matter further, I understand. If I know Worf he will throw himself into his work. But I must ask, are you certain this is what you want?"

"It's not what I want but it's something I have to do. Everyone here on this station looks at me and sees someone who no longer exists. I know running away is not the Klingon way."

"You are not Klingon and I believe under the circumstances leaving the station will give you a chance to decide what you truly want."

"What if what I choose doesn't include Worf?" Martok couldn't help but notice the conflict of mind brewing in his visitor. Staying on the station was not an option, there were too many faces here that recognized her, expected too much from her. Yes, this was for the best.

"I will not lie to you; it will be difficult for him to accept but he will accept it if that is what you choose. No one would fault you. Just know that I will always consider you, my family. If you need anything you just need, ask."

"Thank you." Jadzia offered small smile.

"Qa'pla, Jadzia." Martok bowed and Jadzia gave a slight bow in return.

"Qa'pla, Martok."

Worf had made good time after receiving Jadzia's request to meet in her quarters after his shift was over. She had seen no point in delaying the inevitable conversation about her leaving the station. After ushering him in she headed for the replicator.

"I was going to have a Tarkalian tea, would you like something to drink?"

"No thank you." Worf replied as he sat in a chair adjacent to the sofa. He smirked as he took in the site of her. It seemed this new version of Jadzia preferred to leave her hair hanging loose around her shoulders, something that she usually did before bed. She wore a simple black, button up long-sleeved blouse, and close-fitting pants that displayed her figure in all the right places. He bit the bottom his lip and quickly looked away cursing the urge that was growing within him.

"Tarkalian tea." The replicator hissed and she grabbed the teacup and took a quick sip. When she turned to sit, she appreciated the fact that Worf had opted for the chair. Being close to him knowing what she was about to say, it was uncomfortable enough.

"I understand you were given access to your personal logs." Worf had spoken to Major Kira earlier that day and asked her to provide Jadzia the access code for the logs. He knew it was not likely, but he did hold a small hope that something inside of the logs would spark a memory of her life before.

"Yes, I have to say I was a very interesting person." She took another sip of tea and placed the cup on a side table.

"Yes, you were, you are."

"I have to say that she seems so different from you."

"We are different, very different but we made it work. Most of the credit goes to you."

"Oh?"

"I can be…difficult." He smirked.

"I'm sure I was no picnic in springtime either." They sat in silence for a moment, Jadzia pondered over how to get to the subject of why she asked him here.

"You have something to tell me. I can see its weighing heavily on you." Worf sighed deeply.

"And there lies the problem, everyone here knows me, but I don't know them. At first, I thought that if I stayed it would help but I can see now that it won't. Worf, I asked you here to let you know that I have decided to leave the station. I am going to Earth with Itza."

"I see." Worf had made it a point to talk about her leaving but now that she had already made up her mind, it didn't sit well with him.

"I'm sorry, I know that can't be what you wanted to hear."

"Is it something that I have done?" Maybe she thought they he preferred for her to leave.

"No, no that's not it at all."

"Were you thinking of staying there permanently?"

"I don't know yet; I just think it will be better for both of us if I leave DS9."

"Better, why do you say that?" Now he was confused, how would it better for him especially to have her so far away, out of reach?

"Those logs, I talked about a lot of people that I was close to. But what Jadzia Dax made quite clear was how much she loved you and how loved she felt by you. Sitting here right now I can see the love in your eyes when you look at me, the longing…but Worf, I don't feel anything. No matter how much I want to remember you, remember us I just don't. I don't want to hurt you and I feel like that's all my presence will do if I stay."

"Jadzia, I…"

"Please, you haven't done anything wrong. I just need to figure out where I belong now, that's a decision I feel I can't make here."

"I understand."

"You do…"

"Yes."

"I'm sorry, Worf. Maybe once I can gain my bearings on all of this we can talk."

"Talk." How did they go from planning a family together to this, nothingness? He stood abruptly and headed for the door, and she immediately followed him.

"Worf, wait!" She unconsciously grabbed his left arm to stop him from leaving. He glanced down at her hand on him, and she slowly removed it.

"What more needs to be said?"

"You said you understood but you seem angry." This was not how she wanted their parting to be.

"I am not angry with you, Jadzia." No, he wasn't angry with her just their situation. Angry with the fact that once again someone he loved had been ripped from him. Only this was worse, Jadzia wasn't dead at least not physically.

"Then why…" she started but Worf continued.

"I said I understand but you must understand as well." It was his turn to fill the void between them and he placed his hands on the sides of her shoulders and stepped closer.

"Understand what?" Jadzia had first thought to step away, out of his grasp but her feet wouldn't move. There was something about this closeness, about him that lulled her to move even closer but still her feet would not obey.

"You are right I love you and I will never stop! I took an oath; I swore to stand with you no matter what! I know you don't remember but I do. Jadzia, you are my wife and just know that I will always stand for you, for us! Go to Earth, do what you must and if you decide that your future is not with me…it will not change how I feel about you." With this last he placed a hand against her cheek then cautiously leaned in and gently kissed her lips that were still as sweet as he remembered. Surprisingly she didn't pull away but responded just as gently, her hands found their resting place on his chest. Their lips lingered together for a moment before he pulled away and placed a parting kiss on her forehead.

"Be safe, Par'Machi" He whispered.

"You too," was her reply.