"Alright!" Mari pushed the control handles forward, and then drew them backwards as if she was rowing in Unit-01's Entry Plug while the plug was being filled with blood-like LCL.
The liquid reached the level of her throat and Mari exhaled deeply before pulling her head under the surface and taking a deep 'breath' of the life-sustaining liquid while the plug was filled with the stuff to the brim- Both as a way of reducing shock to the pilot, and also enabling easier synchronization between EVA's mind and that of the pilot.
"You guys repaired this sweetie super-fast! NERV Russia took like half a year to fix Provisional Unit-05 when it's leg malfunctioned!" Mari spoke to the intercom of the EVA. "This sweetie feels like a purring kitten!"
"That's because NERV Japan has roughly eighty-seven times the funding that NERV Russia had due to UN expectation of Geofront and Tokyo-3 being the main site for Angel attacks- A belief that has been mostly correct." Ritsuko's voice was quite exasperated, likely from Mari's 'happy puppy'-like behavior.
Not that Mari minded. She had stars in her eyes anyway, as she was quite excited to get a chance to pilot another EVA unit.
'Kinda funny that I was literally designed from an embryo to be a replacement Pilot, and yet despite that I've only piloted one EVA, and even that was because the actual pilot for Unit-05 got fucking murdered just before the Angel attempted to escape from URAL III's Archeron… And that other Angel attacked at the same time…' Mari stretched herself in her plugsuit that had number '08' in it's chest and back, as she had finally gotten a plug-suit that fits her as opposed to the one she had used in Unit-05 that had been fitted for it's 'actual' pilot- And therefore had been really tight around her chest. 'It's almost as if I am an actual pilot this time around… Anyway… hehehehe… Unit-01 is super duper coooolll… Puppy-kun is super-lucky to be piloting this kinda beastie…'
"Pilot, please focus… The synchronization of Unit-01 will start soon. We already had an issue of Unit-00 going haywire during Rei's synchronization test, so I'd prefer you didn't rampage Unit-01, which is far more dangerous than Unit-00." Ritsuko sounded quite strict and Mari blew a raspberry at the screen before taking a more 'prim and proper' seat in the Entry Plug's pilot-seat. "...If you can't take this seriously then this test is over."
"I get it, I get it… Sheesh… Don't be so high-strung. I was literally designed to be a universally compatible girl, so I can totally hook up with Unit-01 too." Mari joked to the intercom, mixing English into her Japanese. It looked like Ritsuko wasn't amused. "Alright, fine. Unit-05 temporary pilot Mari Makinami Illustrious is standing by and is ready for the synch test. All systems green, mental state stable, no fluctuations, biological functions nominal. Waiting for power."
"Green." Ritsuko sounded like she really wanted to just cancel the test, but both of them knew that they needed at least one active EVA at all times to guard the Geofront. Unit-02 was lacking a leg and few fingers, so it wasn't as if Mari could take that out for a spin, while Unit-00 had burnt most of its internal batteries and nerve-circuitry by activating its AT field to nullify a ridiculous amount of incoming energy, and thus was non-operable for at least a few weeks.
Meanwhile Unit-01 had just some bent and blasted armor-plates, which were mostly cosmetic anyway as far as EVA's actual defenses went. Therefore Mari got to pilot the fabled '1v2 EVA'.
"Soo… Here we go." Mari smirked to herself as she let go of her more playful mood to adopt a more battle-focused outlook. "Unit-01… Activate!"
The Entry-Plug of Unit-01 cycled through various colors and neural views as it sought to harmonize its AT field to the pilot… And the view around the Entry Plug focused to show what the EVA saw.
"Alright! Hole in one- We're good! Unit-01, successfully activated!" Mari celebrated while pumping her fist up in victory, standing on the pilot-seat like a conqueror, before giving the intercom a 'V for victory' hand gesture. "How's the synch-ratio, doctor?"
"...Cut… stop the… emergency latch…" The intercom's voice was mostly filled with static, but Mari heard a few panicked words from Ritsuko through the static.
"Eh?" Mari's celebration ended and left her in an utterly confused state, still stuck in 'V for victory' pose while blinking at the intercom that showed only static… Before the external feed was cut off entirely.
Unit-01 let a roar.
"Ohhh boy." Mari drew LCL through her teeth before she jumped back into the pilot-seat. "Calm down, calm down sweetie… What's wrong?"
However, Unit-01 didn't answer… And instead the EVA lurched forwards.
Mari pulled the control-handles back, trying to stop the EVA… And the controls did absolutely nothing. 'Ooooh no.'
Unit-01 whacked its head against the wall while liquid bakelite began to pour into the EVA-cage to immobilize the EVA.
However, what concerned Mari more than Unit-01's mobility was the fact that it had reached up with its arms… And put both of them to the Unit-s own neck, where the Entry Plug was inserted.
"Oh fuck." Mari's eyes widened as the EVA dug its fingers into its own flesh and armor in an attempt to pull the Entry Plug out.
A spray of liquid bakelite came from somewhere above the cage and splashed on the EVA's fingers, causing them to cement against its neck at rapid pace until the digging ended and Unit-01 howled in abject rage.
'Do you have something against me personally or what?!' Mari thought while she was utterly terrified. "Wait wait wait, timeout! I- eh?"
Unit-01's Entry Plug went utterly black as Unit-01 doubled over… And then Mari saw it.
The Entry Plug was flooded with horrors.
Blood came out of Mari's nose while her whole body felt like it was squished from every direction, pushing her stomach in and causing her eyes to bulge like that of a fish.
'What… is this…'
A view of worlds and worlds, some horrifying beyond measure, some tranquil and quiet yet hiding cruelest of hunters, all crashed into Mari's mind.
Hundreds of items, each exquisite in their manufacture and powerful beyond what she had ever seen, compressed to near-human size as opposed to the gargantuan creations of humans. Piles of gold and items of arcane and occult nature, the kind of which any researcher would give anything to even glimpse.
A pair of S2 Organs hovering over it all, terrible and powerful, conversing in language that was neither thought nor emotion but understanding.
Skulls and flesh of men and women cooked and turned to meals and drinks for cruel, perverse and vengeful gods, ancient-looking dragons rendered of scales, flesh and bone and turned to items.
A staff of gold, upon which danced the screaming, agonized faces of millions of dead.
The gaze upon the staff was a gateway to memories that flooded into Mari's head, causing her eyes to begin to bleed while her face turned white as ash and her limbs began to convulse.
Ancient, horrid crypt where the dead would never die.
Lake of icy-cold water that covered an ancient city built on top of a slumbering mountainous horror.
A frozen hellscape where monsters were unseen and unheard, where travelers would disappear into the blizzard or take shelter in dark stone-wrought mausoleums, only to meet an ever worse fate within.
A woman cradling a doll in a crib, only to look at the intruder to show perfectly white teeth in a face devoid of skin.
A cockroach standing on two legs while wearing a kingly crown and cape to command a legion of locusts to devour intruders whole. A perverse torturer of unbridled cruelty masked under girlish kindness.
A realm of tranquil forest that was surrounded by a hellish marsh of stinging insects and biting parasites. A chitinous swamp-creature was implanting eggs upon its victims, turning its barbed ovipositor towards her near a lake which's shore was strewn with horrific seed-beds that had once been humans.
Mari's body convulsed and blood spurted out of her ears while her body arched into a bow in the pilot-seat.
A lake of lava, a hell personified by a well-dressed businessman who looked up with a cruel and amused smirk as Mari fell to her knees while her legs burned from under her.
Mari's eyes turned unseeing, yet her mind still saw…
A wilderness, where a gigantic fetus with branch-like wings looked at Mari with it's unseeing eyes, a white halo above it's undeveloped head-
It spoke to her.
Mari's consciousness fled her and she flopped down on the Entry Plug's pilot-seat, where she had been convulsing with her back arched into a bow.
A bead of blood of a ruptured blood-vessel ran down from her hair-line to her cheek.
Mari's unseeing, milky eyes were staring forwards while her head rested limply against her chest, the very picture of a broken doll.
Unit-01 crashed down against the floor of the EVA-cage like a marionette with its strings cut.
.
.
Momonga blinked as he could have sworn something had happened in his Inventory and he took a look at the list of contents, and found that nothing was amiss. 'Huh, that's weird…'
He shook his head as he was in the middle of doing his homework in his assigned apartment in Tokyo-3. 'Hmn… So apparently sixteen to the power of two is… And X in Y plus… Hm, three to the power of… Wait, power of…'
Momonga recalled something and squinted his eyes at the paper… Before he recalled that 'something'. "Wait, wait wait… If 'To the power of' is that small number to the top right of an actual number, then…"
He reached into his Inventory and pulled out a briefcase, and opened it.
Inside the briefcase was a block of clear bakelite, inside which was something that appeared like fist-sized human fetus. '...Hm… So this is 'Adam'... [Detect Health]- [Detect Mana].'
Momonga stared at the 'health' and 'mana' numbers that came from the fetus. '...That's some serious bullshit.'
Indeed, the fetus had 'one' health, and ten to the power of eighty mana. 'So wait, if I do a quick calculation, that means… Erm… Ten with eighty zeroes after that.'
"Umu." Momonga was feeling quite overwhelmed. 'Could it be that it's faking its stats? Then again… Actually… Umu.'
"[Triplet Maximize Magic: Penetrate Magic: Delay Magic: Reality Slash]." Momonga waved his hand towards a light-pole in the distance from his apartment-window.
The light-pole turned into four neat steel cylinders after the monomolecular-thin slash of reality hit the item.
More importantly, the spell drained a chunk of Momonga's mana thanks to the pile of unneeded modifiers he stacked. However, that was according to his plan, as it allowed him to test something…
"[Drain Mana]." Momonga put his finger on the bakelite-encased fetus… And his mana bounced back to full. 'Huh… hehehe… hehehehehehhehehe…. Umu, indeed, I can see why Gendo would be hesitant to give something like this to me… In other words, this is a compressed mana battery. Which would also explain why it has so much energy- So it is this world's equivalent of a World-Class Item.'
Momonga took the fetus from his table, put it back into his inventory, and began doing the 'skeleton shuffle' in celebration. 'Hehehee… Life is good, life is good…'
The 'door' to his apartment slammed open against the floor and Momonga froze while his hands were up in the 'spooky skeleton' part of the dance.
Misato was in the doorway and had knocked down the plywood and cardboard sheet that took the place of a 'door' in Momonga's apartment (as he wasn't feeling like fixing it with [Create Item] when it was up to Misato to actually fix what she had broken).
The cardboard 'door' had caved in from a simple knock, and Misato had streaks of sweat running down her face while she was stuck in 'knocking' pose against the empty air.
Shinji was next to her, equally sweaty although from physical exhaustion instead of nervousness, and was panting while leaning his hands against his knees.
Momonga stared at the two.
The two of them stared at him.
"Ahem- Umu." Momonga put his hands down and took a more regal stance while something died inside him. Possibly his pride. "Greetings, Misato-san. Shinji-kun."
"Second." Misato seemed to run through multiple emotions on the spot before the slot-machine defaulted to 'resigned'. "I have come to bargain."
"Oho? I am listening." Momonga motioned for both to come inside and put a pitcher of sparkling water from his inventory on the table alongside a trio of glasses.
While normally he'd be more than a bit hesitant to use YGGDRASIL consumables, it wasn't as if the minor stamina-boost from the sparkling water would do him much good anyway as his stamina was undead-level, which was infinite, and offering something to drink would put Misato and Shinji in a psychological 'debt' from the very start of the negotiations, thus reinforcing his position. 'I think I heard that some of the guys from work got a lot of naive girls into their beds that way, offer a free beer and then leverage on naivety and feeling of being indebted…'
It looked like Misato wasn't buying it, however, while Shinji drank some of the water without question. 'Hm, so Misato is well seasoned in psychological manipulation tactics… I suppose that this was a bit of an overt poke, but at least it gives me more info on what exactly Misato is here for. Or rather, that she's not here for 'friendly banter' but rather is speaking to me as 'Chief of Operations' rather than as 'Misato-chan'.'
Misato glanced at Shinji who blinked a bit and put the glass back on the table.
"That was quite… interesting water, Suzuki-kun. I feel refreshed…" Shinji shook his head a bit to get himself back on track. "No, more than that… I feel like I woke up after a good night's rest. What exactly was that?"
"Full-Moon Dew… Anyway, moving on." Momonga put the half-empty pitcher back into his inventory after refilling Shinji's glass while Misato eyed her glass warily. "You were interested in doing business?"
"You can heal people. I'd like you to heal Asuka." "Please heal Asuka-san. I'll pay any price." Two voices came at the same time, first one from Misato and second from Shinji.
"Hoo? Healing can get pretty expensive, you know." Momonga narrowed his eyes at Misato while Shinji blinked in surprise.
"Ah- I see. Suzuki-kun. Healing taxes your S2 Organ, right?" Shinji seemed to put two and two together. "I see… I am sorry. That was a poorly thought request- Yet at the same time, could you heal Asuka-san after you recover from the battle? I may not be my father, but I am willing to do what it takes to heal Asuka! It was my mistake that caused her current state, and I will shoulder whatever it takes to heal her!"
"Umu…" Momonga sweated internally as Shinji seemed to draw some odd conclusions. 'I heard Shinji knocked Asuka out… Hm… Come to think of it… Umu, this is actually quite advantageous for me. In fact, it's almost perfectly optimal… By healing Asuka for a symbolic price I'll earn Shinji's trust, and gain a degree of goodwill from Asuka… That gives me a lot of pull over two of the three, er, four pilots… Umu… I should play the role of a good samaritan here, because if I haggle too much I'll turn Shinji against me, torpedoing my chance of getting an EVA team to back me up… Not to mention, I still have that favor I can pull from Gendo, so I don't really need anything further from these two since I don't think Misato can actually order NERV into a search-operation for Nazarick…'
"I see… I'll do it. I have recovered enough, I think. After all, Asuka is a baseline human so healing her shouldn't be too taxing… But I have a demand. One that NERV can accomplish." Momonga lifted his finger up ominously and Shinji gulped and paled… But nodded resolutely after closing his eyes, steeling himself, and opening them to show determination in them. Alongside a faint tint of red in the boy's irises, for some reason.
"Name it. I'll do what it takes." Shinji put his elbows on the table and leaned his face into his hands in a startlingly gendo-like manner.
'Then again, they are a father and son… Not to mention, I think they are pretty close even though Gendo is acting distant…' Momonga shook the thought aside.
"I'm willing to hear Second's demand as NERV's Chief of Operations." Misato was quite pale but looked resolute as well.
Momonga as he pointed his finger at Misato who paled and withdrew a bit, as if Momonga's pointed finger would fire a laser at her or something. He then dragged the finger to point at the empty door frame, or rather, what was left of it after the LAW impact.
"Fix the door. That is my demand."
Misato stared at the finger for a while… Before she started to turn red from anger, then pale from some other thought, violet from third, sweated a bit, and finally flopped against the table. "I give up. I can't read you. Either you're playing some over-the-top Gendo-tier 5-D chess, or you're just saying random things."
"Does that mean you'll fix the door or not?"
"NERV will make sure you have the best goddamn door in the whole of Tokyo-3."
"Good, good… It was starting to get drafty here." Momonga nodded thoughtfully while keeping his fleshy eyes closed and hands bunched up for a thoughtful stance. "Now then. Show me to Asuka-chan, Shinji-kun."
"Ah- that- I see!" Shinji seemed to blink a few times before taking a step away from the 'negotiating table', only to turn around, hesitate… And then hug Momonga's waist. "Thank you, Suzuki-kun."
"It's alright. We all make mistakes. Besides, this means you, me and Asuka are going to have a long talk about team dynamics, so consider that your repentance from my side, if you will." Momonga piled on the team-building to drive Shinji's opinion of him further up- He could see from Shinji's posture and words that the boy was taking the attack against a fellow Pilot quite seriously. "Not to mention, there's no guarantee that Asuka will forgive you, you know?"
"I understand, and I vow to do better. Thank you, Suzuki-san." Shinji bowed deeply and Momonga resisted the urge to bow in reply as was customary for businessmen after a successful deal- He didn't want to make the 'deal' seem too official, after all.
'Hoo… Everything is proceeding as planned…' Momonga felt quite happy while Misato excused herself as she got a call.
.
.
Gendo walked forward in Central Dogma, followed by a squad of marines, or rather, Section-Two agents disguised as marines that he had smuggled aboard URAL-III. Which he had used to stage a hostile takeover aboard the carrier, and subsequently sink it after recovering what intel Gendo could gleam from it.
Afterwards Gendo had flown a VTOL-cargo craft back to Tokyo-3 with a cargo-container full of secure sample of the 'Rogue Angel', and with research data from now-demolished NERV Russia. Both the data and the specimens had been elevatored down from Geofront to Central Dogma in advance, allowing Gendo a moment of relative peace.
Gendo looked forward while walking in the greenish-gray bulkhead-hallways of Central Dogma, and projected a command to his visor- To call his Chief Science Officer. "Doctor Akagi?"
"Ritsuko here- Ah. Welcome back commander." Ritsuko's somewhat surprised and tired voice came through the communicator in Gendo's visor. "You're in Central Dogma already? We had issues with Unit-01's synch test with Mari, but the situation is under control. There was a brief rampage, but it was contained."
"I see... That is concerning. Suspend synch-tests with Unit-01 for now- I have another task for you. To that end, I brought souvenirs. I plan on showing it to Second, but before that, I need you to take a look at it. I also sent the data I acquired during my trip about the… 'Rogue Angel' that attacked URAL-III and Acheron. Find out if there's something in the sample that you can use to develop a counter to Second." Gendo projected his voice into the visor while his mouth was shut and for an outside observer, the man was merely walking in tranquil peace. "Don't be too restrained. The specimen was already partially disassembled so what you do to it is easy to sweep under the rug once I confront Second about the Angel- I have suspicion that it was one of its 'agents' or rather 'lesser clones'."
"I see… Very well. I'll see what I can do. Unit-01 is safe, by the way, although Mari is in critical condition." Ritsuko sounded determined and more than a bit curious, and Gendo terminated the call.
"Captain Katsuragi." Gendo opened another call, and Misato answered after a moment. "What is the situation with Second?"
"He's, erm, peaceful for now… What happened,commander? Wait, did you return to Tokyo-3 already?"
"I did. I heard that the Sixth Angel was defeated- Excellent job. I have approved your promotion to Major." Gendo noted a slight hesitancy in Misato's tone and instantly went for a 'kindness and comradeship' approach to dissuade whatever doubts the capable if quite free-thinking Chief of Operations might have developed during Gendo's absence. "The details regarding pilots were somewhat murky. I heard Second Child assaulted Third Child?"
"Yes, but the situation is under control now. Asuka's comatose right now, but her healing has been already negotiated." Misato sounded quite nervous, making Gendo instantly suspicious.
'The fact she uses the term 'healing' instead of 'medical care' or 'surgery' means she's contracted Second to do the healing… It healed Katsuragi once already, which means it's capable of healing in addition to resurrecting…' Gendo analyzed the situation while ordering MAGI to fill him in on the situation from the tracking and recording implants within Second's fleshy overcoat- And played back the recording on Second's meeting with Katsuragi and Shinji. '...Hm. Katsuragi… You are a fool.'
Gendo stopped walking and the squad of marines behind him almost collided against the Commander of NERV's back.
The Commander of Nerv whacked his head against the bulkhead, feeling his rage and frustration grow ever higher while his face was unmoved, utterly passive. 'Ha… "Fix the door"- Katsuragi, only a simple fool like you could believe that Second meant the apartment door. He meant the Gate of Golgotha, which had been wrestled open by my usage of the Key of Nebucandezzar… '
'Of course Second saw through my plan to utilize the key… However, the fact he's making the demand rather than doing something more proactive about it means he's currently on the back foot… Only fools who are losing ground make demands for someone to stop and undo what they've done, and only those who are gaining ground can ignore those demands.' Gendo felt quite paranoid as one one hand Second had realized what Gendo had been doing, he hadn't stopped Gendo from doing it. 'Hm. Indeed, only fools make such demands… And Second is no fool. Assuming the statement to be something like that is a fool's errand on my part, and dangerous in the long run. There is a hidden statement here- But what exactly is he hinting at… "It was starting to get drafty here"- Does that statement hold the key to deciphering his words? Can the Second feel the expanding Sea of Life after the Gate has opened in the center of Arctica?'
Gendo turned to walk towards his quarters to scheme, and handwaved for the 'soldiers' to leave and return to their barracks for r&r.
Quite a few of the disguised Section-Two looked in bewilderment at the wall which had a huge bloody mark that streaked down, after Gendo had hit his head against the steel and cracked his head on it.
However, Gendo walked away completely unharmed- The Key of Nebucandezzar made it so.
Gendo's fate was no longer his.
But it was no-one else's either.
The key was turned, and the lock was destined to thus open- The door had nothing to say to it, for it was but a vessel. All it could do was delay the inevitable.
Such was the path of godhood.
'Angels and demons… Such wretched creatures…'
.
.
Asuka blinked slowly as she regained consciousness… And she squinted her eyes closed as a drop of some sort of lukewarm liquid fell on her forehead.
She twitched a bit as her body slowly regained its strength and she could start to feel her arms and legs, and then another drop of lukewarm liquid splashed on her head.
"Owwwiee…" Asuka whined as her whole body ached, as if she had been stuck in a bed for days without moving. However, another drop of the lukewarm liquid wiped that soreness off.
Asuka realized that she had an oxygen mask on her face and reached to take it off out of instinct. She then took a deep breath of the anesthetic-and-disinfectant smelling hospital air while looking around the sterile, huge operating theater-like room that had been cleared of equipment so that it was merely a huge room devoid of anything but a single hospital bed and a night-table.
"Greetings, Asuka-san." A male voice from somewhere nearby greeted Asuka's return to consciousness, and she glanced to the side to see Second, who had a pipette in his hand and was drawing a few drops of some sort of red liquid from a bottle. "Are you feeling well?"
"I… What the hell was that?! You distracted me so I didn't hit the shot against the Angel! Dummkopf!" Asuka instantly masked her uncertainty with anger and pointed a finger towards Second, who merely put the pipette above Asuka's head and let another drop fall on her head.
Asuka felt as her spine popped a bit as her sore back straightened itself and relaxed in response to the red droplet hitting her head and being absorbed into it. 'That felt good… Hey! What gives?!'
"What are you doing?! Are those drugs?" Asuka growled at Second who put the pipette into the bottle of red liquid… And then put both into some sort of swirling portal.
"It was a healing potion. Speaking of Angels, the cube-Angel was killed so you don't have to worry about that." Second waved his hand placatingly. "How are you feeling?"
"I…" Asuka's fuming quieted down considerably as the portal reminded her that the massive man was an Angel and she was completely in his mercy. As long as she wasn't in her EVA at any rate.
"I heard you and Shinji had some sort of fight-" Second started and Asuka's rage re-ignited.
"That idiot! Murderous, scheming, idiot, bratty fool! I was trying to apologize to him for… For doing my thing, but the Second Child charged me and started to hit me, and… and…" Asuka's body flinched against her will.
The memory of Shinji's normally either uncertain, determined or cowardly face being contorted into a mask of rage, the irises that had a tinge of red, the pair of hands on Asuka's throat and slamming her head against the steel floor… The fact Asuka's strikes had been completely ignored by Shinji, even when they broke his nose and probably a tooth or two, all combined into a terrifying image that caused Asuka to feel a degree of instinctive fear.
The show of force Shinji had made before the battle joined the traumatic memory and made Asuka's headstrong appearance waver.
Another drop of some lukewarm liquid hit Asuka's head and she looked up to see that Second had pulled the bottle out again and was administering more drops on her.
"Hm. I'm not sure this works on mental damage…" Second seemed to be thinking to himself for a moment but snapped off of it to put the item back into his portal. "Alright. So, again, how are you feeling? You seemed to relapse just now."
"I… It was terrifying…" Asuka let her real thoughts slip during a moment of weakness, although she resisted the urge to pull her knees against her chest and merely sat straight on her hospital-bed.
"The battle was quite short but intense, I agree. The fact our enemy could effectively ignore all but one-shot attacks made it quite difficult to fight." Second agreed cordially, albeit missed the main reason for Asuka's terror, much to her relief. "I heard from Shinji that you two had an altercation- And in a sense of comradeship, I feel like I should tell you that Shinji begged for me to heal you, and was ready to give me everything he had in exchange."
"Well yeah, and he was the one who rendered me unconscious…" Asuka was feeling quite vindictive nonetheless. 'So the violent thug apologizes once he has finished beating me to an inch of death… Yeah, right. As if that'd just make everything right…'
"I agree. A road to forgiveness is not so easy." Second seemed thoughtful. "You two are, however, fellow Pilots for a guild- Er, NERV so while I can't really ask you to forgive Shinji, I would like to ask you to at least open yourself for potential cooperation in the future."
"...Never."
"I see. In all honesty I understand that point of view as well." Second nodded to himself. "I would find it difficult to even approach the thought of forgiving someone who stabbed me in the back and stole all my dropped stuff… Metaphorically speaking, of course."
'...What?' Asuka was baffled by Second's nonsensical example but the Angel moved onto the next subject at lightning speed.
"Speaking of, what are you planning on doing regarding your apartment? I doubt you are interested in sleeping in the same apartment as Shinji for the time being. In all honesty I have more than enough apartments in that complex, as technically speaking NERV donated all but one of them to me. If you are interested you can have an entire floor to yourself." Second seemed to be making some sort of offer.
"...Why?" Asuka wasn't going to assume the offer was made purely out of goodwill and expected hooks in it. "Are you hitting on me? Trying to get me alone into an apartment you own and then take advantage of me?"
"I- geh?" Second seemed to be taken aback. "No, no, not at all!"
"Am I not interesting, then?" Asuka bunched her arms and huffed while looking away from Second.
"I- Timeout. Change in topic." Second redirected the flow of conversation which made Asuka feel quite victorious as she discovered a hidden weakness in Second's outwardly professional posturing.
'Virgin. Figures.' Asuka felt smug over Second's blustering, although it wasn't as if she had any 'experience' to brag about either.
"...Khahem. Ahem. Anyway, it's been three days since the Sixth Angel was defeated and paperwork has piled up. I mean, homework. I was asked by the homeroom teacher to bring you yours once you woke up." Second offered Asuka a pile of papers. "My apologies for delaying your healing, but I needed to recover from the fight as well. Ahem, and also… Umu, this might sound odd, but I'd like it if you please limit your chuunibyou behavior."
"Chuu-something? I don't recognize that word- I speak German as my native language. Be more descriptive." Asuka narrowed her eyes as she suspected that Second was making fun of her.
"Ahem, it roughly means 'middle schooler syndrome' where a teenager has delusions of grandeur or believes themselves to possess a secret power or knowledge that elevates them from their peers and is desperate to prove it to everyone- Which comes out as a example of cringy behavior, as anyone who truly harbored such things would keep quiet about them." Second coughed to his fist.
"Ha! Which means I do not suffer from such a 'syndrome' since I am superior to everyone, and I know my 'secret power'- That of being an EVA pilot of the strongest and most advanced EVA in the world, Unit-02!" Asuka huffed proudly while having her hands bunched up and eyes closed, waiting for Second to admit to his foolishness. "When I and Unit-02 fight together, there is nothing that can stand in our way! Ewiger sieg ist mein schicksal! Besides- Have you looked at yourself in the mirror? Aren't you literally a school-boy holding 'arcane and secret' information and 'secret power' beyond your 'peers'? Aren't you the chuunibyou here?"
However, nothing happened in response to Asuka's proud speech, and the redhead creaked one of her eyes slightly open after a moment… And paused to stare at Second as he was cowering in a corner with his knees hugged against his chest, and he was rocking back and forth while staring at the corner with unseeing eyes.
'Um…' Asuka sweated a bit as Second was muttering something about actors and whatnot.
She creeped out of her bed after checking that her hospital-gown was properly secured, and creeped beside the disoriented Angel… And poked his cheek a few times with her forefinger. "Hello? Anyone home?"
"Ugh… Ahem, umu, I mean…" Second seemed to snap from his daze. "I apologize. It seems that your… My… Our chuuni is quite… hazardous to my health. Mental health, specifically. It brings back memories from my own chuuni past, and, ahem… Let's change the subject."
"Yeah, and you going to cower in a corner when faced by my mighty presence isn't cringy at all…" Asuka noted while looking down her nose at Second.
Second seemed to suffer some sort of existential failure and… simply put, ceased to be in the corner.
"Eh?" 'Wait, did I accidentally kill Second with the force of the cringe alone?' Asuka blinked at the empty space, and then turned to see that Second was pouring tea into a cup in his earlier seat, as he had pulled a tea set from his portal, complete with a pair of chairs and a table. '...Did he just-'
"Ahem, I apologize for that disgraceful display. Let us move on and forget. However, you've now discovered my weakness, so I expect that you stay quiet about it. In exchange I promise to recognize your, erm, Unit-02's excellence. Tea?" Second had adopted a more noble pose, which conflicted quite spectacularly with the highschooler-clothes he wore. "Would you be interested in telling me more about Unit-02?"
"Thank you." Asuka walked to the table, sat down on the chair opposite to Second, and took the offered cup while reveling in her victory. "Ha, I knew you'd recognize excellence where it existed. You have better taste than I initially assumed- Let me tell you about Unit-02's features…"
.
.
'I need to keep an eye out for Asuka… She's seriously dangerous!' Momonga drank tea while [Emotion Suppression] was working overtime to repair his fragmented mind. 'Death by cringe… Of all the ways to die mentally, that would have been the worst… But while removing Asuka would fix the problem right now, I can probably use her to gradually build my resistance to Chuuni so that it won't disable me in the future… Not to mention, if Unit-02 can do even half the things she's saying, the EVA would be a fairly good asset, specifically if buffed with some resistance-scrolls and whatnot…'
And so, Asuka kept blabbering about Unit-02's capabilities with a proud and excited look on her face, while Momonga kept absorbing the information.