Fifi's New Tiny Toon Adventures
Written by Artist1990
Based on "Tiny Toon Adventures" created by Tom Ruegger and produced by Warner Bros. Animation and Amblin
Based on the "Pokémon" Video Games by Nintendo & Game Freak and the Anime Series by OLM, Inc.
Other guest starring franchises belong to their respective owners.
Note: All Pokémon dialogue is translated.
(Insert New Version of "Tiny Toon Adventures" Theme Song)
(We see the Warner Bros. logo which zooms away and it transitions to the Tiny Toons circle.)
Buster: We're tiny . . .
(Buster appears.)
Babs: We're toony . . .
(Babs appears.)
Cast: We're all a little looney,
(The rest of the Tiny Toons cast join in.)
And in this cartoony,
we're invading your TV.
(The Tiny Toons run out of the TV.)
Buster and Babs: We're comic dispensers.
(Buster squirts himself with a seltzer bottle, while Babs hits herself with a pie.)
Fifi: We crahck up ahll ze censahrs.
(The censors are laughing)
Cast: On Tiny Toon Adventures,
(Fifi emerges from the TV and smashes the screen with a mallet.)
get a dose of comedy!
(Buster is dressed as a doctor, while Babs and Fifi are dressed as nurses.)
So here's Acme Acres,
it's a whole wide world apart.
(We see a view of Acme Acres.)
Fifi: Our hahme sweet hahme, eet stahnds ahlahne,
a cahrtoon wahrk of ahrt!
(Fifi is making a painting of her Cadillac. She's wearing a French barret.)
Plucky: The scripts were rejected,
(Plucky is operating a type writer.)
expect the unexpected.
(A second Plucky head emerges from the paper, scaring the real Plucky.)
Cast: On Tiny Toon Adventures, it's about to start!
(We see the Tiny Toon Adventures logo again.)
Plucky: They're furry,
They're funny.
(Buster and Babs Bunny appear.)
Cast: They're Babs and Buster Bunny.
(Buster and Babs take off their disguises, revealing that Buster is really Babs and Babs is really Buster.)
Montana Max has money.
(Montana Max emerges from a pile of dollars, holding more dollars.)
Elmyra a pain!
(Elmyra smiles at the audience, only to get pelted by some produce, showing how much the fandom hates her.)
Buster: Here's Hamton.
(Hamton sucks up the dust with his vacuum.)
Plucky: And Plucky!
(Plucky emerges from the vacuum.)
Babs: Fifi's very mushy!
(Fifi grabs Hamton and kisses him silly, covering his face in pink lipstick kisses. Hamton has a blissful smile on his face.)
Cast: Furrball's unlucky . . .
(Furrball is smelling a flower until a piano crushes him.)
and Gogo is insane.
(Gogo Dodo hits himself with a mallet, splitting him into more copies.)
Fifi: Aht Ahcme Looniverseety we earn our toon degree.
(We see Acme Looniversity.)
Ze teacheeng stahff's been getteeng laughs seence 1933!
(Fifi and the other students are gathered at class. The teachers present are Bugs Bunny, Yosemite Sam, Speedy Gonzales and Witch Hazel, posing. Yosemite Sam is flattened by an anvil.)
Cast: We're tiny, we're toony, we're all a little looney,
(We see the cast of Tiny Toon Adventures)
It's Tiny Toon Adventures, come and join the fun!
(We see the logo again, but then, Fifi thrusts the words of 'Fifi's New' on top and joins Buster and Babs in the logo.)
Fifi: Ahnd now our sahng ees dahne!
Screwball 101
Ever since the ballet recital where Elmyra Duff tried to capture Fifi La Fume, but failed, Fifi and her mother; Fleur La Fume decided to find a new place in the city since Elmyra knows where they live. With Elmyra locked tight in jail, it was the perfect time to move. It took them about a week, but the La Fumes managed to purchase a house next to Mary Melody's apartment. The Cadillac was moved to a garage so that it can be repaired to working condition once Fifi graduates. Right now, Fifi was taking a thorough shower to get rid of the junkyard smell. The young skunkette was singing as she showered. She was just finishing using soap to clean her fur. She then applied shampoo in her hair and began to scrub into her hair.
Alouette, gentille alouette
Alouette, je te plumerai
Je te plumerai la tête
Je te plumerai la tête
Et la tête! Et la tête!
Alouette, Alouette!
Oh, oh, oh, oh
Alouette, gentille alouette
Alouette, je te plumerai
After finishing her shower, she dried herself with her towel and put on her green bathrobe. She then dried her hair using a hair dryer. After that was done, she walked down to the kitchen where Fleur was cooking a fancy French breakfast. "Bahnjour, mahthair," said Fifi.
"Bahnjour, Fifi. Breakfahst ees ready," said Fleur.
"So, how do I smell?" asked Fifi.
"You smell a laht bettair. Zat showair certainly gaht reed of zat junkyard smell. You're sure to ahttrahct boys now," said Fleur.
"Merci," said Fifi. She then began to dig in on the breakfast that her mother made. After Fifi had breakfast, she was preparing to go to Acme Looniversity. The skunkette had already put on her pink bow and purple eyeshadow. She was about to head out the door when she heard her mother's voice.
"Where do you sink you're going, young lahdy?" asked Fleur.
"To school of course," said Fifi.
"Naht like zat you're naht," said Fleur.
"Whaht do you mean?" asked Fifi.
"Fifi, you're een your teens ahnd you're steell going ahround, nahked," said Fleur.
"Why ees zat a prahblem? Ze teachers ahnd students dahn't seem to mind. Certain mentahrs ahlahng weeth my clahssmate, Furrbahll go ahround nahked. Ahnd Bustair ahnd Plucky dahn't even wear pahnts," said Fifi.
"Maybe aht your current ahge. But you're soon going to entair full puberty. Ahnd when you develahp zem, I dahn't wahnt ze boys to be stahreeng aht your bounceeng boobies," said Fleur.
"Mahthair!" cried Fifi, with her head turning red in embarrassment.
"Besides, eef you stahrt weareeng clahthes, maybe boys will stahrt to tahke nahtice of you ahnd would wahnt to dahte you," said Fleur. Fifi sighed in defeat.
"Alhlright. I'll do eet fahr ze boys," said Fifi. A few minutes later, Fifi changed into some clothes. The purple skunkette was now wearing a light green shirt with a darker green skirt.
"Fifi, you now look like a true lahdy," said Fleur happily.
"One mahre sing," said Fifi. She took out a tube of pink lipstick and began to apply the stuff on her lips. Once she was done, her lips were now a lovely shade of pink. "Now I look like a real lahdy," said Fifi. The two started to walk toward Acme Looniversity. It was at that moment that Mary Melody was on her way to school as well. "Bahnjour, Mahry," said Fifi.
"Hello, Fifi," said Mary. She then noticed Fifi was actually wearing clothes. "You're actually wearing clothes outside of fancy occasions?" asked Mary.
"Oui. My mahthair eenseested zat I do, especially wance I fineesh puberty," said Fifi.
"Bahnjour," said Fleur.
"So you're Fifi's mom. I'm Mary Melody," said Mary.
"Pleased to meet you. I'm Fleur La Fume," said Fleur.
"It's nice that your mother is there for you now," said Mary.
"Oui. I'm naht ahs lahnely ahnymahre when I'm aht hahme," said Fifi.
Very soon, Fifi & her mother and Mary arrived to Acme Looniversity. Just then, Fifi saw her friends, Babs and Shirley. "Hey, Bahbs, Sheerley!" called Fifi. The two noticed their skunkette friend.
"Hiya, Fifi," said Babs.
"You're, like, actually wearing clothes and makeup outside of fancy occasions?" asked Shirley.
"Eet wahs because my mahthair eenseested I stahrt weareeng clahthes ahll ze time," said Fifi.
"Bahnjour," said Fleur.
"Hello there, Mrs. La Fume," said Babs.
"Like, you remember us from the ballet recital," said Shirley.
"Oui. I do," said Fleur. Just then, Hamton Pig arrived and saw Fifi in her dress and makeup.
"F-F-Fifi, is that really you?" asked Hamton nervously. Fifi noticed Hamton.
"Ze one ahnd only," said Fifi, fluttering her eyelashes at Hamton.
"Y-y-y look p-p-pretty today, Fifi," said Hamton.
"Merci," said Fifi, doing a curtsey.
"Who ees ziss young boy?" asked Fleur.
"Ziss ees Hahmtahn Peeg. He's one of ze few boys who does like me. He took me out to ze prahm one year," said Fifi.
"Aaawwww. Eesn't zat sweet?" asked Fleur. Then, Buster Bunny, Plucky Duck and Dizzy Devil came walking by. The instant they saw Fleur, the three boys started to go gaga at how beautiful she was. They did wolf whistles, howls and rowrs. Fifi just walked up to the three and smacked them with her tail.
"Zat ees my mahthair you're going gahga ovair" said Fleur.
"Your mother?!" asked Buster. The three began to blush in embarrassment.
"Sorry," said Dizzy. Fleur shook her head.
At that moment, Pepé Le Pew was walking out of the building. He saw Fleur La Fume standing there. The male skunk's stripes on his tail turned red like a thermometer and his eyes turned into pink hearts. His heart pounded out of his chest and he even had a violent nosebleed due to how sexy she was. "Ooh la la! Le sexy skunk fahtale!" cried Pepé. Pepé ran toward Fleur and jumped into her arms.
"Hey! Whaht gives?!" asked Fleur. She suddenly shrieked when Pepé started burying his face in between her boobs.
"Ahh, my gahddess of lahve. Where hahve you been ahll my life? You're ze onsair to a lahnely skunk's prayers," said Pepé. He began to plant kisses on Fleur's faces. Fleur's face turned red due to a combination of embarrassment and anger.
"FUR-VERT!" yelled Fleur. She grabbed Pepé by the head and threw him to the ground, real hard.
"Le ouch!" cried Pepé.
"I'm a mahrried skunkette, zank you," said Fleur. Pepé's eyes widened when he heard the "M" word. A heart above him cracked and shattered. The pieces buried Pepé. Fifi dug up her mentor.
"Zat ees my mahthair, Fleur La Fume fahr you, Prahfessahr Pepé Le Pew. I dahn't sink dahddy would ahppreciate you fleerteeng weeth my mahthair eef he were here," said Fifi.
"I ahm so sahrry, mahdam," said Pepé.
"You bettair be. You're lucky I hahven't decided to hahve you ahrrested fahr being so perverted towahrd me," scolded Fleur.
Another person began to approach the group. It was Bimbette Skunk, Fifi's rival. She was humming to herself, but stopped when she Fleur La Fume. Her eyes widened when she saw beautiful and sexy she was. "What the?! Who's that?! I'm supposed to be the prettiest skunkette here!" cried Bimbette, out loud. Fifi and the others heard her.
"Well, ahppahrently, you're naht. Ziss ees my mahthair," said Fifi. "You must be Beembette. Fifi's tahld me ahbout you een hair phahne cahnversahtions ahnd letters. I dahn't ahppreciate how you try to put hair down by mahkeeng doubt hair beauty or hair ahbeelity to ahttrahct boys," said Fleur, frowning.
"Well she'll never be as beautiful as me," said Bimbette.
"Dahn't be too sure. Sahmeday, she'll grow up to be a bahmbshell like moi," said Fleur.
"Hmph," huffed Bimbette. And she walked away. Fleur turned to Fifi.
"I'll peeck you up ahftair school, Fifi," said Fleur.
"Okay, mahthair," said Fifi.
Very soon, all the students sat at their desks in the classroom. At that moment, Bugs Bunny came in. "Class, I have a special announcement," said Bugs. All the students stared at their teacher when they heard him say that. "Today will be the first of what I hope will be something that'll happen every now and then. I negotiated with another cartoon studio to have their mascot cartoon character come to Acme Looniversity as a guest teacher. If this first one's a successful, we'll have other veteran cartoon characters from other studios come to our school as guest teachers," said Bugs.
"So, who is this guest teacher?" asked Sweetie.
"I'm glad you asked. He should be here, any minute," said Bugs.
(Insert Mystery Toon's Theme)
Suddenly, the door opened and a flash of blue and red zoomed around the class. All the students began to look around for who was zooming around the class. Suddenly, the guest teacher burst out of a large slab of wood that Bugs set. He was a red-headed woodpecker with green eyes, blue and white feathers on most of his body, wore white gloves and had a yellow-orange beak and feet. "Guess who?" asked the toon. The woodpecker pecked his name on the wood slab, which was none other than Woody Woodpecker. He then let out his signature laugh.
(End Music)
"No way! You gaht Woody Woodpeckair to cahme here?! Le squeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" cried Fifi happily. She screamed so loud that she caused the glass in the class to crack, including Bookworm's glasses. She jumped out of her desk and ran up to Woody. "My nahme ees Fifi La Fume! I'm one of your beeggest fahns! Could I hahve your autahgrahph?! Ahnd please tell me you hahve a pen!" cried Fifi excitedly. Woody turned to Bugs.
"Hey Bugs, you got another piece of wood?" asked Woody.
"Yes, I do," said Bugs, taking out another piece of wood. Woody then grabbed the wood and pecked at it. He then handed it to Fifi. For he pecked his signature on the wood.
"Oh. Zat wahrks too. Merci," said Fifi. Fifi then went back to her desk.
"Anyway, I managed to get Woody Woodpecker on loan from Universal Studios. He's going to be a teacher for the week," said Bugs.
"So, what kind of new class are you going to teach us?" asked Buster.
"I'm glad you asked. For today, I'm going to teach you Screwball 101," said Woody.
"Screwball 101?" asked Babs.
"Yep. I'm famous for driving people cuckoo. So, I'm going to teach you students how to drive people crazy if they get on your bad side. Just the other day, these annoying superhero wannabes known as the Teen Titans got on my bad side. But by the time I was through with them, they've been shipped off to the laughing academy," said Woody.
"You know, my mentor, Daffy Duck started out as a total screwball in his early years in the golden age of animation. But then, starting in the 50s, he became the greedy slob he is today," said Plucky.
"Which rubbed off on you too," sneered Buster. Plucky just gave Buster a look.
After school, Fifi was in a happy mood when her mother picked her up. "You seem to be hahppy tahday, Fifi, dahrleeng. Deed you meet a cute boy?" asked Fleur.
"Naht yet. I'm hahppy cause a guest teachair cahme tahday ahnd ees going to be teacheeng fahr a couple of days," said Fifi.
"Ahnd who ees zat?" asked Fleur.
"Eet's Woody Woodpeckair!" said Fifi.
"Really?!" asked Fleur, looking surprised.
"Oui. Ahnd I gaht hees autahgrahph," said Fifi.
"Whaht wahs he teacheeng?" asked Fleur.
"A new clahss cahlled Screwbahll 101," said Fifi.
"Whaht kind of clahss ees zat?" asked Fleur.
"A clahss zat teaches us how to drive people crahzy. but only eef zey ahntahgahnize you first," explained Fifi.
"Really," said Fleur.
Meanwhile, Elmyra Duff, the most hated resident of Acme Acres had been recently released from jail. She was heading for the Acme Acres Junkyard, unaware that Fifi had moved away. "Purple kitty's not going to escape me this time," said Elmyra. But when she entered the junkyard, there was no sign of Fifi's Cadillac or the electric fence surrounding it. When the pet obsessive girl realized this, she let out a horrified scream. "Pretty kitty's gone!" cried Elmyra. She began to desperately looking around the junkyard for any sign of Fifi, but it was all in vain. At that moment, a junkyard worker was inspecting the yard when he saw Elmyra searching through a pile of scrap metal.
"What are you doing, young lady?" asked the Junkyard Worker.
"I'm looking for pretty kitty!" cried Elmyra.
"What pretty kitty?" asked the Junkyard Worker.
"The purple kitty with pink bow and French accent!" cried Elmyra. The junkyard worker then realized who she was talking about.
"Oh. You must be referring to the skunk, Fifi La Fume. You mean you haven't heard? She and her mother moved out the junkyard cause her mother wanted her daughter to live in a cleaner environment," said the Junkyard Worker.
"So where is pretty kitty living now?" asked Elmyra.
"They left no forwarding address. You're on your own," said the Junkyard Worker.
"This is not my day," said Elmyra.
Woody Woodpecker went back to the hotel room he was staying at. Waiting for him was a female woodpecker, whose head feathers were styled into a ponytail and had blue eyes and wore a red skirt.
"I'm back, Winnie," said Woody.
"Hello, Woody," said Winnie. She kissed Woody on the lips.
"So, what was it like being a guest teacher at Acme Looniversity?" asked Winnie.
"The students are well behaved, mostly. I even signed an autograph for one of the students," said Woody.
"Who?" asked Winnie.
"A young skunkette named Fifi La Fume," said Woody.
"I see," said Winnie.
When Fifi got home and went up to her room, she took off her dress since she was at home now. Just then, Fleur knocked on Fifi's room door. "Cahme een," said Fifi. Her mother opened the door.
"I zought I'd check up on you," said Fleur. Just then, Fleur saw something that made her looked surprised. It was a shrine in honor of Pikachu. There were various photos of her with Pikachu on the wall. On a shelf, were some candles. At the center of the shrine was the painting Fifi made of Pikachu zapping Elmyra, with her watching and blushing. Fifi was currently holding a life sized plush doll of Pikachu. "Fifi, whaht een ze wahrld ees ziss?" asked Fleur.
"Oh, zat? Eet's a shrine zat I mahde een hahnor of a very special boy," said Fifi.
"A Peekahchu?" asked Fleur.
"Oui. He sahved my life frahm Elmyra years ahgo. Ahnd evair seence zen, I've fahllen een lahve weeth heem evair seence," said Fifi.
Fleur looked at some of the photos, which showed Pikachu not really enjoying Fifi's company due to her smell and aggressive wooing. "I dahn't sink peekahchu's really enjoying your ahffection," said Fleur.
"Oh mahthair. He wahs just being shy, like ze othair boys. But he'll eventually wahrm up to me when we meet ahgain," said Fifi. Fifi then began to kiss the plush Pikachu, covering its face in pink kiss marks.
"Okay. Zat ees just, how you say, deesturbeeng," said Fleur.
The next day was a Saturday and Fifi La Fume was wandering the city, looking for a potential boyfriend. "Why ahre zere so few boy skunks een ziss ceety? I must search ze whahle ceety eef I hahve to," said Fifi. Just then, Fifi heard Elmyra's voice.
"Kitty, I found you at last!" cried Elmyra. Fifi turned and screamed when she saw Elmyra coming. The skunkette began to ran as fast as she could. Elmyra noticed Fifi was running faster than usual. "Not so fast! I can't keep up with you!" cried Elmyra.
"I've been tahkeeng Roadrunnair's trahck ahnd field clahsses so I cahn cahtch a boy ahnd outrun you! Ahnd eet's your ahneemahl chahseeng ahnteecs ees exahctly why my mahthair ahnd I mahved ahway!" said Fifi. And she began to run even faster.
"Why do the animals always run away?" panted Elmyra. As Fifi was running, she heard a voice.
"Hey, Fifi!" called Woody.
"Woody," said Fifi.
"It looks like you're running from somebody," said Woody.
"I ahm," said Fifi.
"Come with me," said Woody. They went into the hotel safely. Fortunately, Elmyra didn't spot them go in. She ran past the hotel until she ran out of breath and collapsed onto the ground.
Woody took Fifi to his hotel room. "Woody, you didn't tell me we were expecting company," said Winnie.
"Oh. Bahnjour. I'm Fifi La Fume, one of ze students aht Ahcme Looniverseety," said Fifi.
"I'm Winnie Woodpecker, his wife. You're pretty for a skunkette," said Winnie.
"Merci," said Fifi.
"So what brings you here?" asked Winnie.
"She's hiding," said Woody.
"Hiding? From who or what?" asked Winnie.
"A pet obsessive geerl nahmed Elmyra Duff. She used to ahttend Ahcme Looniverseety befahre Preenceepahl Bugs trahnsferred hair to ahnahthair school. She's gaht ze brain of a spahnge. Due to hair low I.Q., she's unahware of ze ahbuse she's eenfleecteeng on ze ahneemahls. Eet seems recently, she's been mahre obsessed weeth cahptureeng me zan ahny of ze othair ahneemahl residents here," said Fifi.
"Why?" asked Woody.
"She sinks I'm a caht when I'm really a skunk. I sink hair recent obsession hahd to do weeth zat one time she nearly succeeded een cahptureeng me, only fahr a Peekahchu to cahme to my rescue. I cahn't stahnd eet ahnymahre! I weesh I cahn tahrment hair fahr a chahnge!" said Fifi. Then, a sneaky smile formed on Woody's face.
"That's not a bad idea," said Woody.
"Huh?" asked Fifi.
"I've been teaching you and the class those screwball lessons. So, it's time we put them to good use," said Woody. Fifi smiled too.
"I like ze sound of zat," said Fifi.
"Be careful, Woody,"'said Winnie.
"Don't worry, I will," said Woody.
Elmyra was wandering near the river, looking for any sign of Fifi. "Come out, stinky kitty. I won't hurt you," said Elmyra.
"Yoo-hoo!" called a voice behind her. Elmyra turned around, only to get pecked on the head. When Elmyra came to, she saw that it was Woody Woodpecker.
"How cute! A birdie!" cried Elmyra.
"Come and catch me!" said Woody. He stuck his tongue out at Elmyra before flying away. Elmyra began running after him.
"When I catch you, I'm going to hug you and squeeze you and you're going to be mine forever and ever!" said Elmyra.
Unbeknownst to Elmyra, Fifi was in a tree, waiting for her with a water barrel. Woody flew by and winked at Fifi, giving her a signal. As Elmyra got closer, Fifi threw the barrel and Elmyra got trapped in it. "Bullseye!" said Fifi. Fifi quickly got off the tree and rolled the barrel into the river. Elmyra emerged from the barrel and saw it was heading for a waterfall. The stupid girl screamed as she and barrel fell down the waterfall. She passed by some people wearing ponchos, who shouted, "Hooray!" Fifi laughed hysterically seeing what happened to Elmyra.
"Now, what shall we do next?" asked Woody.
"I might hahve ahn idea," said Fifi, raising her eyebrows. She began to whisper in Woody's ear and Woody smiled.
"I like the sound of that," said Woody.
Elmyra arrived back to the city, dripping wet. Just then, she heard a voice. "Hey you," said the voice. Elmyra turned and saw the voiced belonged to Fifi wearing a hair stylist's assistant disguise. She also was using a good, fake English accent. "It looks like you could use a visit to the hair salon by the look of you all dripping wet. Come here and we'll have you fixed up in a jiffy," said Fifi. She began to push Elmyra into the hair salon. Waiting for her was Woody Woodpecker dressed as a hair stylist.
"Here, take a seat," said Woody. He put Elmyra in one of the seats. "First thing we need to do is to dry that hair of yours," said Woody. Woody and Fifi began to rinse, cut and comb Elmyra's hair. After that, Woody put a hair dryer over Elmyra's head and turned it on. It began to dry Elmyra's hair. After a few minutes, the hair drying process was done.
"Now let's see how you look," said Fifi. They held a mirror in front of Elmyra. Elmyra now had a hairstyle that resembled the bride of Frankenstein. She shrieked at the sight of it. She screamed so loud that it caused the screen to crack. Elmyra then fainted. After that, they wheeled her out of the hair salon on a cart. Fifi and Woody turned to the hair stylist who ran the shop and winked at her. And she winked back. For she was in on the prank too. The next day, Fifi and Woody were ready to put their next prank in action.
"Besides chahseeng ahneemahls, Elmyra tries to fleert weeth Mahntahna Mahx, ze school bully. I sink how we cahn use zat to our ahdvahntage," said Fifi.
"How?" asked Woody.
"Do you hahve ahn empty bahttle I could put a sahmple of steenk een?" asked Fifi.
"I do. Why?" asked Woody.
"I hahve ahn idea," said Fifi.
In her room, Elmyra was going to try to impress Monty with a new dress she got, which was a simple blue dress. She hadn't put on perfume yet. When she wasn't looking, Fifi swiped the bottle of perfume she had and replaced it with a bottle that looked like it. Elmyra grabbed the perfume and began to spray it on herself. "Hmm. Not my usual perfume. But it'll do," said Elmyra. She then went to find Montana Max. Fifi and Woody giggled.
"Now what?" asked Woody.
"We'll see how Mahntahna Mahx's reacts to Elmyra's new 'perfume'," snickered Fifi.
Elmyra searched the city until she saw Montana Max walking down the street.
"Oh Monty!" called Elmyra. Monty turned around and saw Elmyra in her dress.
"What do you want this time?" asked Monty.
"What do you think of my new dress?" asked Elmyra.
"Well, it's . . . ," said Monty. Suddenly, he got a whiff of the skunk scent that Elmyra sprayed on herself.
"UGH! What kind of perfume did you put on?!" asked Monty.
"My favorite kind. Why?" asked Elmyra.
"Cause it smells like a skunk!" cried Monty, before fainted. "
What?" asked Elmyra. She sniffed part of her body and her eyes widened when she realized Monty was right.
"PEW!" cried Elmyra before she fainted herself. Fifi laughed hysterically, with tears running down her eyes.
"Oh that was great!" said Fifi.
(Insert "Surfin' Bird" [Bird's the Word])
For the next couple of days, Fifi and Woody made Elmyra's week a very rotten one indeed. After the skunk "perfume" prank, they lured Elmyra into a forbidden area by changing a "Do Not Enter" sign to "Enter" so that the stupid human girl would get attacked pack of hungry crocodiles. After the crocodiles attacked her, Elmyra's clothes were torn and one of their dentures was latched onto part of her skirt.
Then, Fifi lured Elmyra to a place that was surrounded by an electric fence. Woody temporarily removed the warning sign after Fifi was safely behind the border of the fence. So, when Elmyra touched the fence, she was electrocuted silly, skeleton and all. Fifi and Woody laughed at Elmyra as she was zapped. "I bet you gaht a real jahlt out of zat one!" said Fifi. And she resumed laughing. Not too long after that prank, after Elmyra's shocking surprise, she was looking for Fifi when she saw what appeared to be Fifi's tail hanging down from a tree.
"Found you!" said Elmyra. She pulled at the tail, which came off. "Huh?" asked Elmyra. It was a fake tail. Suddenly, a box fell on top of her and burst open. Inside the box were an animal Elmyra didn't like, slugs. "AAAAUGH! Slugs! Get 'em off me! Get 'em off me! Get 'em off me!" cried Elmyra, running around like crazy. Fifi and Woody were in another tree, laughing at at her.
An hour later, Elmyra was chasing after Plucky once again. As Plucky was being chased, Woody pulled the green duck to safety and he replaced him with a dynamite decoy. Elmyra then ran up to the decoy Plucky and began to hug it. "I'm going to hug you, squeeze you and . . . ," KA-BOOM! The dynamite decoy exploded and Elmyra was black as soot. She let out a cough before fainting. Fifi, Woody and Plucky laughed hysterically.
"Oh man! She's more stupid than I originally imagined," said Plucky.
Much later, Elmyra was having lunch when Fifi slipped some Acme Super Laxative into her juice. After drinking all of it, the effects of the laxative kicked in as indicated by Elmyra's eyes widening. "Uh-oh!" cried Elmyra. She ran into the girls' room, fast. If one were to pass by the girls' room, they would hear loud frapping noises as well as painful shrieks. This was followed by a horrid smell. Fifi and Woody (who were wearing gas masks) snickered at Elmyra's misfortune.
Later that afternoon, Elmyra was searching for Fifi once again. Fifi put a sign outside of a forest that said, "Purple kitty this way". "Yay! I found you!" said Elmyra. She ran into the forest. But when she got in, she saw some other cute animal. It was a baby Argentinosaurus. "Ooh! A baby dinosaur! I'll take him or her home too!" cried Elmyra. She ran up to the baby dinosaur and began to hug it, too hard. "You're so cute, I'm gonna hug you and squeeze you and . . . ," said Elmyra. Suddenly, she noticed a large shadow over her. Elmyra looked up and saw the baby Argentinosaurus' mother. It looked pretty mad too. Elmyra smiled nervously and let the baby Argentinosaurus go. It then ran back to its mother. The mother Argentinosaurus raised its mighty foot. Elmyra let out a nervous gulp. SPLAT! The Argentinosaurus stomped on Elmyra, flattening her into a pancake. She went to find a bicycle air pump. Fifi and Woody were on the ground, laughing once again.
(End Music)
Elmyra limped as she headed home. By now, her sanity was hanging by a thread as indicated by her twitching eye. "I can't stand it. Why are these things happening to me? What did I do to deserve this?" asked Elmyra.
"Hahveeng a bahd day, ahre ya, Elmyra Dumb," said a voice behind Elmyra. The human girl turned around and saw Fifi, smirking.
"Kitty!" cried Elmyra. She began to run toward Fifi. Fifi quickly ran for it. She stuck her tongue out before running faster. As Elmyra ran, she lost sight of Fifi. "Where'd pretty kitty go?" asked Elmyra. She then saw what appeared to Fifi's long, fluffy tail around the corner. She crept quietly and grabbed the tail. "Gotcha!" said Elmyra. But when she pulled it, she saw it wasn't Fifi. It was the wild cat from the cartoon, "Wild Over You". Fifi had painted its tail purple and white. The wild cat then began to maul Elmyra. After she was done, Elmyra was covered in scratches and her clothes had tears all over.
The wild cat snarled and began to chase after Elmyra. Elmyra screamed as she ran for her life. "Bad kitty! Bad kitty!" cried Elmyra. She then saw a sign outside a building that read, "Escape Route". Elmyra ran into the building. But the building was full of booby traps set up by Fifi and Woody. The wild cat stopped outside the building. If one were to walk by, they would hear a lot of explosions, clangs, bonks, animal jaws chomping and high pitched screams. Elmyra reached the end of the building, covered in bruises and a black eye. She was also missing some teeth and her wig was shredded. Fifi turned to Woody.
"You sink we overdeed ze trahps?" asked Fifi.
"Nah. She had it coming, like you said," said Woody. Suddenly, Elmyra got back up and let out a hysterical scream, which turned into laughter. She then began to bounce around everywhere and let out "woo-hoos", just like Daffy Duck in his screwball days. As Elmyra was acting crazy, Fifi held out a sign that had a screw and a ball, spelling out, screwball. Later, Elmyra was strapped to a stretcher and put in a truck that took her to an insane asylum. Fifi and Woody were amused by this. "So, care to join me and wife for dinner tonight along with your mother?" asked Woody.
That evening, Fifi and her mother went to Woody's hotel room to have dinner with Woody and Winnie. Winnie cooked the dinner. "Eet's so good to meet you een persahn. Fifi's been tahlkeeng ahbout you evair seence you cahme ahs a guest teachair," said Fleur.
"Glad to hear. And she certainly enjoyed putting my screwball lessons to good use to make Elmyra's last couple of days very rotten for all the times she stalked her. Our last prank sent her to the looney bin," said Woody.
"Ze one prahnk I really enjoyed pulleeng on hair wahs getteeng hair squashed by a mahthair deenahsaur," said Fifi. Fleur shook her head.
"Oh Fifi," said Fleur. She then let out a giggle.
"By the way, due to the success of me as a guest teacher, Acme Looniversity is going to do more guest teacher days every now and then. And, the class of Screwball 101 is going to be a permanent class," said Woody.
"Really," said Winnie.
"I'm pretty sure ze students will mahke use of zose lessahns. I certainly deed," said Fifi. She then began to laugh her own version of Woody's signature laugh.
(Insert "Tiny Toon Adventures Ending Theme")
Gag Credits: Woody Woodpecker's appearance courtesy of Universal Studios.
(Woody Woodpecker appears from the Tiny Toons circle and does his laugh.)
Sneak Peek
On the next episode of "Fifi's New Tiny Toon Adventures", it's National Skunk Day, so we are going to focus on the skunks on Acme Acres. First, in "May I Take Your Odor?", Fleur La Fume takes a job at the Blanc Buffet and asks her daughter to help her out from time to time. Can Fifi live up to her mother's expectations? Then, Bimbette Skunk competes with Montana Max for the title of "The Richest Student of Acme Looniversity". And finally, in "Fifi Meets Sylvester Jr.", our favorite skunkette falls in love with Sylvester's son when he's painted like a skunk. Tune in next time for the episode, "National Skunk Day".
There you have it. The guest teacher was Woody Woodpecker. It was my brother's idea to feature him after he heard a co-worker's phone use a text alert, which was Woody's laugh. I had so much fun writing this episode since it gives me another chance to punish Elmyra. In future episodes, some of the guest teachers will be Hanna Barbara characters since Warner Bros. now owns them.