Hello again, readers. Some of you probably heard by now, thanks to those selfish jerks; Cancel Culture, Pepé Le Pew is being removed from Space Jam: New Legacy. And now, they're trying to do the same thing to Speedy Gonzales. But Speedy's actor is defending his character tooth and nail. Already, I'm planning to write an episode for this fanfiction series, which will be a giant middle finger toward moral guardians and Cancel Culture, slanderizing them to the extreme. I'm also going to write a fanfiction separate from this series where after Pepé is excluded from future projects, villains who were exiled from their stories come back for revenge against moral guardians and everybody else who wronged them. And Pepé is the only one who can defeat. I'll write that one after we find if Fifi is going to stay in Tiny Toons Looniversity or not cause what direction the TTA reboot takes depends on how I write this planned story. But anyway, I'm also planning to feature Pepé in every upcoming episode of Fifi's New Tiny Toon Adventures, starting with this one as another way to spite the moral guardians. So anyway, enjoy the story.
Decided to update story to incorporate Ace the Bat Hound.
Fifi's New Tiny Toon Adventures
Written and Illustrated by Artist1990
Based on "Tiny Toon Adventures" created by Tom Ruegger and produced by Warner Bros. Animation and Amblin
Based on the "Pokémon" Video Games by Nintendo & Game Freak and the Anime Series by OLM, Inc.
Other guest starring franchises belong to their respective owners.
Note: All Pokémon dialogue is translated.
(Insert New Version of "Tiny Toon Adventures" Theme Song)
(We see the Warner Bros. logo which zooms away and it transitions to the Tiny Toons circle.)
Buster: We're tiny . . .
(Buster appears.)
Babs: We're toony . . .
(Babs appears.)
Cast: We're all a little looney,
(The rest of the Tiny Toons cast join in. Mary Melody replaces Elmyra Duff.)
And in this cartoony,
we're invading your TV.
(The Tiny Toons run out of the TV.)
Buster and Babs: We're comic dispensers.
(Buster squirts himself with a seltzer bottle, while Babs hits herself with a pie.)
Fifi: We crahck up ahll ze censahrs.
(The censors are laughing)
Cast: On Tiny Toon Adventures,
(Fifi emerges from the TV smashes the screen with a mallet.)
get a dose of comedy!
(Buster is dressed as a doctor, while Babs and Fifi are dressed as nurses.)
So here's Acme Acres,
it's a whole wide world apart.
(We see a view of Acme Acres.)
Fifi: Our hahme sweet hahme, eet stahnds ahlahne,
a cahrtoon wahrk of ahrt!
(Fifi is making a painting of her Cadillac. She's wearing a French barret.)
Plucky: The scripts were rejected,
(Plucky is operating a type writer.)
expect the unexpected.
(A second Plucky head emerges from the paper, scaring the real Plucky.)
Cast: On Tiny Toon Adventures, it's about to start!
(We see the Tiny Toon Adventures logo again.)
Plucky: They're furry,
They're funny.
(Buster and Babs Bunny appear.)
Cast: They're Babs and Buster Bunny.
(Buster and Babs take off their disguises, revealing that Buster is really Babs and Babs is really Buster.)
Montana Max has money.
(Montana Max emerges from a pile of dollars, holding more dollars.)
Elmyra is a pain!
(Elmyra smiles at the audience, only to get pelted by some produce, showing how much the fandom hates her.)
Buster: Here's Hamton.
(Hamton is vacuuming his floor.)
Plucky: And Plucky!
(Plucky emerges from the vacuum.)
Babs: Fifi's very mushy!
(Fifi sees Furrball as a skunk and her eyes turned into pink hearts.)
Cast: Furrball's unlucky . . .
(Furrball is grabbed by Fifi and she starts kissing him, covering his face in pink lipstick marks.)
and Gogo is insane.
(Gogo Dodo hits himself with a mallet, splitting him into more copies.)
Fifi: Aht Ahcme Looniverseety we earn our toon degree.
(We see Acme Looniversity.)
Ze teacheeng stahff's been getteeng laughs seence 1933!
(Fifi and the other students are gathered at class. The teachers present are Bugs Bunny, Pepé Le Pew, the Roadrunner and Wile E. Coyote, posing. Wile E. is flattened by an anvil.)
Cast: We're tiny, we're toony, we're all a little looney,
(We see the cast of Tiny Toon Adventures)
It's Tiny Toon Adventures, come and join the fun!
(We see the logo again, but then, Fifi thrusts the words of 'Fifi's New' on top and joins Buster and Babs in the logo.)
Fifi: Ahnd now our sahng ees dahne!
Hyena Havoc
(Insert "Car Chase" from Batman the Animated Series)
In the city of Acme Acres, a car chase was taking place. It was between the Batmobile and the Jokermobile. Batman had chased Joker all the way to Acme Acres, again. Batman wasn't alone. For with him was his pet Great Dane, Ace the Bat Hound. With the Clown Prince of Crime were Harley Quinn, her two pet hyenas; Bud & Lou and four goons. Harley was the one driving. "Go faster, Harley! Batsy's catching up!" cried Joker.
"I'm going as fast as I can!" replied Harley. Joker got out a machine gun and fired at the Batmobile. But the bullets just bounced off the black car's armor. Batman made the next move. He had the Batmobile fire a small missile that exploded into tiny spikes. The spikes popped the tires of the Jokermobile. The Jokermobile started to skid out of control. Joker and his goons screamed as the car spun around. Suddenly, the villains' car went flying off a ramp and into the air. Batman stopped the Batmobile and jumped out of the car. He took out a pair of binoculars to see where the Jokermobile might land. In the city, Calamity Coyote was setting up a dynamite trap to catch Little Beeper. As he was setting up the last dynamite sticks, he heard some screaming up above. He looked up and saw the Jokermobile falling toward him. Calamity held out a sign that read, "Uh-oh". The Jokermobile landed on the dynamite and a loud explosion occurred. Batman saw the explosion in the distance. Not to mention, Joker, Harley, Bud, Lou and the four goons were sent flying into the air.
"Looks like I got my work cut out," said Batman. Ace barked in reply. Calamity was black as soot from the explosion. He just stood there, blinking.
(End Music)
Elsewhere in the city, Furrball the Cat was wandering the city, humming to himself. Without warning, something fell on top of Furrball, flattening him into a pancake. The ones that fell on the blue cat was Bud and Lou the Hyenas. Furrball got back up and shook himself back to normal. Bud and Lou whimpered as they got back up. "What a trip," said Bud.
"You're telling me," said Lou. Just then, the hyena duo spotted Furrball. "Well, well, well. Look what we have here," said Lou.
"That's one tasty looking cat," said Bud. The two hyenas licked their lips. Furrball screeched in alarm and began to run for it. "Get him!" said Bud. The two hyenas began to chase after poor Furrball.
Meanwhile, Fifi La Fume was at an ice cream parlor, lost in thought as she eat her ice cream sundae. She was thinking about when she met this cute skunk boy, not knowing it was really Furrball with a white stripe, painted on his back. Furrball thought Fifi was a cat like him until he saw what she really was. The outfit she was wearing currently was her pink blouse and yellow skirt. "Le sigh. Why deed you leave me? I zought you liked me. Please cahme bahck to me. I'm so lahnely," said Fifi to herself.
Furrball ran until he his behind some crates. Unfortunately, Bud and Lou were searching the area. "Here kitty, kitty, kitty," said Bud.
"You can't hide forever," said Lou.
"There's gotta be a way to scare off those hyenas," said Furrball. He then saw a can of white paint in front of him. There was also a tin full of stinky cheese. Next to the cheese was a crate full of months old garlic. "I know it's a big risk, but it looks like I'll have to paint myself into a skunk. But I don't think the cheese and garlic is enough for the smell. I'll need something really stinky," said Furrball. He then saw a box full of the stinkiest fruit in existence; durians. "Perfect," said Furrball. He soon got to work disguising himself like a skunk. Bud and Lou continued to look for Furrball when he appeared in front of them.
"Now we got you, dinner!" said Bud.
"Chow time!" said Lou. The two hyenas started to charge, until Furrball turned around, showing his fake skunk stripe. The two hyenas stopped in their tracks. They also got a good whiff of the smelly mixture of cheese, garlic and durians.
"SKUNK!" cried Bud & Lou. The two ran for it, whimpering. Furrball watched as the two ran. They crashed into a nearby wall, knocking themselves out. Furrball snickered after seeing the hyenas knock themselves out.
"Now to wash this paint and smell off before you know who shows up," said Furrball. Unfortunately, Furrball slipped on a banana peel and started to slide across the ground, screaming. The screen froze and the fake latin name, Clumsius Caticus appeared on the bottom of the screen. The screen unfroze and Furrball continued sliding and screaming. In the opposite direction, Fifi La Fume was walking down the street, looking for a boy to love her. The purple skunkette then heard Furrball's scream. She didn't see him coming until too late. CRASH! Furrball crashed into Fifi and the two rolled down a small hilly sidewalk. They finally came to a stop. When Furrball opened his eyes, he saw his lips were locked with Fifi's. He jumped back and gasped. Fifi was annoyed.
"Hey. You need to wahtch where you're going. Ahnd eef you wahnted to keess me, you hahve to ea . . . ," said Fifi. But she stopped. Fifi noticed the white stripe on Furrball's tail and instantly recognized him. The purple skunkette's eyes and her eye pupils turned into pink hearts, knowing who he was. The stripe on her tail also turned red like a thermometer and her heart pounded with love. "Le squee! My pepperahni of pahssion! You've returned to moi aht lahst!" cried Fifi. She then scooped Furrball into her arms and began to hug him. In the process, Furrball's face was getting smooshed by her breasts. Fifi was also crying tears of joy. "Where hahve been? I meessed you. Life hahs been ze misery weethout you. But ahll zat mahtters ees zat I hahve you een my ahrms ahgain! Le hahppy sahb!" cried Fifi.
Furrball's face started to turn red due to lack of air. He let out muffled meows to get Fifi's attention. Fifi then pulled Furrball away from her bosom. "I'm sahrry mahn ahmahre. Were my new breasts suffahcahteeng you?" asked Fifi. Furrball nodded. "Zen how ahbout I keess you eenstead?" asked Fifi. Furrball had a look of horror when he heard that. Fifi puckered her lips, which turned pink and plump. The purple skunkette then started planting kisses all over Furrball, leaving pink kiss marks. The screen froze on a front view of Fifi's face with puckered lips and the fake latin name, Huggius Kissius appeared on the bottom of the screen. The screen unfroze and Fifi continued smooching Furrball. Furrball got stunk out by Fifi's smell. He broke free of Fifi's grip and began to run for it. "Oh no. I'm naht going to let you get ahway ziss time!" said Fifi. She then began to hop on all fours after Furrball. Furrball ran until he arrived outside of a paint shop. He hoped to buy blue paint to paint off the stripe. Unfortunately for then, there was a notice that said that they were out of blue paint til next week.
"Next week?! I can't wait next week!" said Furrball.
"Next week fahr whaht?" asked a voice. Furrball turned around and yelped. For it was Fifi who spoke. He tried to run again, but Fifi grabbed him by the tail to prevent him from running. "Dahn't fight eet, my lahve. You know you wahnt me," said Fifi. She fluttered her eyelashes in a cute manner. Suddenly the wind began to blow Furrball's fake smell in Fifi's direction. Fifi got a good sniff of Furrball's fake odor and her eyes widened. It was stinkier than Fifi's own smell. "Le pew! Seence when deed you lahst tahke a bahth?! I'm defeenitely geeving you a bahth befahre we go on a dahte!" said Fifi, holding her nose.
Oh no! I can't let her find out I'm not a skunk that way! She'll be reduced to tears if she finds out I'm just a cat! Or worse, she'll get angry and stink me out into a coma!, thought Furrball. Furrball them burst free and began to ran for his life.
"My heart ees telleeng me to go ahftair heem, but my nahse ees telleeng me to scrahm. But seence he's leaveeng such a strahng smell, finding heem wahn't be a prahblem," said Fifi. And she chased after him again.
(Insert "Can-Can" [Fast Version])
Fifi La Fume chased Furrball all over Acme Acres. "Wait fahr me, my skunk hunk!" cried Fifi. She giggled as she hopped after Furrball.
"But I'm a cat!" cried Furrball.
"So ahm I. Le pahlecaht," said Fifi.
Aye yai yai. What's wrong with this girl?!, thought Furrball. Fifi chased Furrball into an abandoned building. Furrball opened the door to a room, but Fifi was waiting for him, wearing her green dress. She held put her arms, ready for a hug. Furrball screeched in alarm and ran from the room.
"Run! Run! Ahs fahst you cahn!" said Fifi. Furrball saw another room. Unfortunately, Fifi was already there, wearing a yellow dress. "You cahn't escahpe frahm moi!" said Fifi. She puckered her lips, which turned red this time. Furrball slammed the door and ran the opposite direction. Furrball opened the door to a third room, but once again, Fifi intercepted him. Now, she was wearing a two piece green bikini along with dark pink sunglasses. "My skunky mahn!" said Fifi.
"AAAAAAHHHHH!" screamed Furrball. He finally escaped the building by jumping out the window.
(End Music)
After those close encounters, Furrball ran until he stopped under the shade of a tree. He panted to catch his breath. "Oh, zere you ahre, my cheese soufflé," said a familiar, French accented voice. Furrball's blood ran cold and he slowly turned around. Standing next to him was Fifi La Fume. Furrball screamed and tried to run for it, but Fifi used her large, fluffy tail to snare him. "Stahp runneeng. Just relahx. Look," said Fifi. She showed Furrball a heart carving she made on three. She also carved her name along with the words, "Skunk Hunk". "Seence you shyly wahn't tell me your nahme, I cahrved skunk hunk," said Fifi. The purple skunkette then applied bright, glossy pink lipstick on her lips. Furrball's eyes widened in horror, knowing what the lipstick was for. "Keess me!" said Fifi. She then began to kiss Furrball silly, leaving pink kiss marks. Furrball was disgusted by Fifi's sloppy kisses. But Fifi didn't stop at his face. She also kissed him on the arms, the legs and the tail. She practically kissed him all over his entire body, leaving him entirely covered in Fifi's lovely lipstick. "Now fahr ze beeg, wet juicy one!" said Fifi. She then began to force a kiss on Furrball's lips. Furrball struggled to break free, but Fifi wouldn't let go. It was at that moment that Furrball's fake smell started to take effect on Fifi. She started to lose her grip on Furrball. And finally, she collapsed to the ground with a silly look on her face. The smelly combination of the stinky cheese, garlic and durians was too much for even her. Furrball let out a sigh of relief and ran off.
Minutes later, Fifi La Fume woke up and saw Furrball was gone. "I ahsk myself, Fifi, ees eet wahrth eet, steell chahseeng zat boy?" Fifi asked herself. And then, a silly smile formed on her face. "My onsair ees, yes, YES! Eet ees wahrth eet, Fifi! Veeva L'ahmahre!" said Fifi. She then ran off to find her "skunk hunk".
Meanwhile, Furrball was trying to wash himself. He managed to wash off the smell and the kiss marks, but not his stripe. "Having trouble, cat?" asked a voice. Furrball turned around and saw the voice belonged to Batman, with Ace by his side.
"I am, Batman and Ace. I painted myself to look like a skunk to scare off somebody, but only to attract a bigger problem," said Furrball.
"What bigger problem?" asked Ace. Batman couldn't hear Ace speaking English, but Furrball could. The three then heard Fifi's voice from several blocks away.
"Yoo-hoo! Where ahre you my smelly sausahge? Cahme out ahnd get your keesses!" called Fifi. She then made some kissing noises as a way of flirting.
"Her! She thinks I'm a real boy skunk and wants to make me her boyfriend! You gotta save me!" cried Furrball.
"What a blind, lovesick fool," said Ace. It was lucky for him that Fifi didn't hear him say that. Batman took out one of his grappling guns.
"Here. Hold onto this," said Batman, handing the grappling gun to Furrball.
"Meow?" asked Furrball. Suddenly, the grappling gun fired on its own and Furrball was hoisted up the building behind him. He screeched as he was carried to safety. At that moment, Fifi came into view.
"Batman. Whaht ahre you doing here? You seem pretty fahr ahway frahm Gahthahm Ceety," said Fifi.
"My business is my own," said Batman.
"Oh. I see zat you brought your dahg, Ahce weeth too. Hahve you seen a hahndsahme boy skunk go by? He's ahbout my size, hahs blue fur, ahn unusually sin tail ahnd hahs a very strahng smell," said Fifi.
"He went that way," said Batman, pointing to the west.
"Merci!" cried Fifi. She began to hop on all fours once again. "When I find you, eet's gahnna be finders keepers!" called Fifi. And she disappeared around the corner. Furrball climbed down the building and let out a sigh of relief.
"Thanks, Batman. I don't know if could take another stinky kiss from her," said Furrball.
"I'll take you home," said Batman.
After telling him where he lived, Batman drove Furrball home in the Batmobile. Once the Dark Knight's car parked outside, Furrball made a mad dash for the Duff house. Once he got inside, he began to barricade the front door. He nailed boards over the door, barricaded it with chains and a key lock. After that, he put yellow tape, forcefield lasers, a coded lock and do not cross signs. Furrball's eyes twitched as he giggled with insanity. "I'm safe. Heh, heh, heh. Safe from that silly skunkette," said Furrball.
"Furrball?" asked Duncan, who was coming into the room.
"Why'd you barricade the door and why do you have a paint stripe on your back?" asked Duncan.
But before Furrball could answer, he heard the voice of another person he hoped he wouldn't run into cry out, "Furrball, my precious kitty!" Furrball screamed like a sissy girl. For the voice belonged to Elmyra Duff, who had just come in through the backdoor. She had grown slightly taller and her body was starting to develop curves, but her attire remained the same. "I missed you so much in my time in the asylum! I just got released today!" said Elmyra. She began to run toward Furrball, not noticing the hole that was in floor left by Pug a week and a half ago. "I get to hug you, squeeze you and love you to piec-AAAAAAAAAAUGH!" screamed Elmyra as she fell down the hole. Duncan and Furrball cringed at the sound of Elmyra crashing to the bottom of the hole. Elmyra laid down on her back, dazed and seeing birds flying around her head. Furrball was trying hard not to laugh. One of the construction workers picked up Elmyra and carried her out of the hole.
"Ms. Duff, I suggest you watch your step," said the construction worker. Elmyra recovered from the fall.
"How did big hole get there?" asked Elmyra.
"Remember that pug you brought home before you were shipped to the asylum?" asked Duncan.
"Yes. What about Puggy Wuggy?" asked Elmyra.
"He caused the hole. He along with Sweetie Pie were trying to kill Furrball with dad's shotgun," said Duncan. Elmyra let out a horrified gasp when she heard what Duncan said. "Apparently, Furrball had enough of Pug bullying him so he along with another cat took a stand against him. And after several stuff happened to Pug, he snapped and tried to shoot him. But during the struggle, he shot a flea bomb under the floor, which exploded, making the hole you fell into. Pug and Sweetie are currently locked in the padded cage," explained Duncan. Suddenly, Elmyra began to squeeze Furrball.
"Thank goodness you were unharmed, Furrball! I was afraid I'd never see you again!" cried Elmyra. Furrball burst free of Elmyra's grip and clung onto Duncan, trembling. "What's the matter, Furrball? Aren't you happy to see me?" asked Elmyra. The blue cat shook his head. "What? Why?" asked Elmyra.
"Elmyra, when I had to take care of your pets while you were gone, the truth . . . ," said Duncan. He sighed, knowing it wasn't going to be easy. " . . . the pets like me better than you," said Duncan. "WHAT?!" asked Elmyra, looking very shocked.
"Whenever I come to feed them, they tell me that they relieved that you were gone. They issued their complaints about how you've treated them in the past. I know it's hard to accept, but what they're saying is true and straight from their hearts. I'm sorry," said Duncan.
"I got out of ha ha house . . . for this?!" fumed Elmyra. She began to storm off in a huff.
"Elmyra, wait!" cried Duncan. But Elmyra slammed the back door behind her. Duncan let put a disappointed sigh. He turned to Furrball. "Come on. Let's clean that paint off of you," said Duncan.
It wasn't long before Duncan was giving Furrball a nice warm bath to clean off the paint and fake skunk smell. Normally, the bathes that Elmyra gives to her pets are scorching hot. But not the ones Duncan gives them. They are just the right temperature. As Duncan cleaning Furrball, the blue cat was explaining why he had the stripe. " . . . and after I scared off those hyenas, I ran into my fellow student, Fifi who wanted to get her hands and lips all over me. She chased me all over town. But luckily, I ran into Batman and Ace who hid me from her and sent her on a false trail," said Furrball.
"Batman and Ace? Why are they here?" asked Duncan.
"I don't know. That's what I'd like to find out," said Furrball.
In another part of town, Fifi La Fume had arrived home, disappointed that she didn't find her skunk hunk. It was dark now. "Whoa ees moi. I found my pepperahni of pahssion ahgain, only to lahse heem ahgain," said Fifi as she closed the door to the electric fence. She went inside the house, where her mother, Fleur La Fume was waiting.
"Fifi," said Fleur, causing Fifi to snap out of her sad state. "Where hahve you been, young lahdy? You're lahte fahr deennair, wheech ees getteeng cahld," said Fleur, sternly.
"I'm sahrry, mahthair," said Fifi.
"Go wahsh your hahnds. You kept moi waiteeng lahng enough," said Fleur. After washing her hands, Fifi and her mom began to have dinner. "So why were you so lahte?" asked Fleur.
"I rahn eento ziss cute blue furred, skunk hunk zat I hahven't encountered fahr a lahng time. He's ahlways playing hahrd to get ahnd I really wahnt to go on a dahte weeth heem," said Fifi.
"But ieef you meet heem ahgain, dahn't keednahp heem," said Fleur sternly.
"You're naht going to let me fahrget zat one time, ahre you?" asked Fifi, whose cheeks turned red in embarrassment.
"No. Next time you encountair heem, ahsk fahr hees numbair. But stahrteeng tahmorrow, fahr ze next couple of mahnths, I need you hahme befahre bedtime," said Fleur.
"Why?" asked Fifi.
"You hahven't read ze news tahday, hahve you?" asked Fleur. Fleur La Fume took out today's newspaper and showed it to her daughter. The front headline read, "Local Animal Lover Released from Asylum".
"Le gahsp! Elmyra hahs been released?!" asked Fifi.
"Oui. Zat's why I wahnt you hahme befahre dahrk. I wahrry ahbout you whenevair zat mahnstair ees on ze streets. Eef you get cahptured by hair, Peekahchu wahn't be zere to sahve you ziss time," said Fleur.
"But I may hahve a Bahtman to sahve me. He's here een Ahcme Ahcres ahlahng weeth hees dahg, Ahce ze Baht Hound," said Fifi.
"Really. Zat may be so, but I steell wahnt you hahme een ze sahfety of your house befahre ze sun sets," said Fleur.
"Yes, mahthair," said Fifi.
"Just whaht ees Bahtman doing here een Ahcme Ahcres?" asked Fleur.
"He deedn't say. He said eet wahs hees business," said Fifi.
"He wouldn't leave Gahthahm ceety unless he hahd a good reasahn," said Fleur.
And speaking of Batman, after parking the Batmobile in a secret garage, he changed back into Bruce Wayne and went to the hotel where he and Alfred were staying at. Ace was out of his costume too. "Have you and Ace found the Joker and his gang yet, sir?" asked Alfred.
"No, I'm afraid not. The Joker's trail went cold after his getaway car was destroyed by an explosion that scattered him and his cronies. Not even Ace could pick it up," said Bruce.
"This is the second time you chased laughing boy all the way to Acme Acres. Why would he return here?" asked Alfred.
"Most of the residents in this city are looney like him, but not to the same extent as the Joker," said Batman.
"In other words, he feels right at home here," said Alfred.
"You took the words right out of my mouth, Alfred," said Bruce.
(Insert "The Joker's Theme" from Batman the Animated Series")
Elsewhere, the Joker and Harley Quinn were recovering from being sent flying by the explosion. They groaned as they woke up. Suddenly, Joker began to sniff the air and cringed. "Ugh! Of all the places to land in, why did it have to be this dumpster?!" complained the Joker.
"Phew!" said Harley. Harley then realized that she and Joker were the only ones present. "Oh no! The babies! Bud, Lou, where are you?!" asked Harley.
"They must've gotten separated by the explosion that destroyed our car," said the Joker.
"We gotta find them Mr. J, before something bad happens to them!" cried Harley. She grabbed the Joker by the arm and began to run, dragging the Joker. The Clown Prince of Crime yelped as he got dragged by Harley.
(End Music)
Several blocks away, Elmyra was fuming with jealousy due to Furrball liking Duncan better. "How could kitty witty does this to me? I've showed him as much love, fed him and gave him a home! And this how repays me?! I don't need him. I'll find some other cute pet," said Elmyra. Just then, the dumb girl saw something. It was Bud and Lou the hyenas, who were still unconscious from crashing into the wall. Elmyra became excited at the sight of them. "Puppies!" cried Elmyra. She ran up to them and picked them. "I'll take you two home definitely!" said Elmyra. She then began to carry the two hyenas back home.
It was morning when Bud and Lou finally woke up. "Ugh . . . what happened?" asked Bud.
"Where are we?" asked Lou. When their eyes fully opened, they saw Elmyra staring at them.
"Yay! You're finally awake, my two new puppies! I'm Elmyra Duff and I'm your new owner!" said Elmyra. The two hyenas stood back a bit from Elmyra. But then, they finally looked at each other. Their eyes widened, seeing that they were wearing diapers and baby bonnets, courtesy of Elmyra. Bud and Lou shrieked, seeing what they were wearing. Elmyra then began to squeeze the life out of the two hyenas. "You two are so cute! I'm gonna hug you, squeeze you, feed you, change your diapers and love you both to pieces!" said Elmyra happily. Suddenly, Bud and Lou snarled and began to attack Elmyra with their claws and teeth. The dumb girl screamed as she got mauled. When the mauling was done, Elmyra's clothes were covered in tears and her wig was messed up. She also had a black eye. Bud and Lou laughed at her like the hyenas they were. "You sure like to play rough," said Elmyra pathetically. At that moment, Furrball walked into the room, wondering what was going on. Furrball, Bud and Lou recognized each other.
"You!" cried all three.
"You're that blue cat!" said Lou.
"You may have gotten away before, lunch! But you won't this time!" said Bud. Furrball screeched when he saw Bud and Lou charging at him. Fortunately, Elmyra came to her senses and grabbed the two hyenas by the collars.
"No! Bad puppies! You can't eat Furrball!" scolded Elmyra. Bud and Lou let out grunts of disappointment.
"In my house, we're all family," said Elmyra. She then hugged Furrball and the two hyenas, hard. Bud and Lou just rolled their eyes. Later, Elmyra went to give Bud and Lou a bath, much to Furrball's relief. Duncan began to feed him and the other pets their lunches. Whenever he feeds the Xenomorph alien, he uses a stick with a slab of meat attached to it. The alien would then snag the meat and devour it. After Duncan gave the pets their food, he left.
"You seem troubled Furrball. What's wrong?" asked Tyrone.
"Elmyra has gotten two new pets. She apparently thinks their puppies, but they're actually hyenas," said Furrball. Most of the other pets gasped when they heard this.
"Hyenas?!" asked Charlie.
"Yes," said Furrball.
"What is she thinking?!" asked Chicken Boo.
"Hyenas are wild animals!" said Johnny Pew.
"What a brain dead idiot," said the Xenomorph. At that moment, everybody heard Bud and Lou yipping in pain.
"Sounds like Elmyra is giving those two a scorching hot bath," said Flavio Hippo.
"Bwak! Scorching hot bath! Scorching hat bath!" said a Norwegion Blue Parrot that Elmyra had.
"I think those hyenas belong to somebody else," said Furrball.
"What do you mean?" asked Shep the Dog.
"I actually met them before Elmyra captured them. They had collars on them," said Furrball.
"Uh-oh. Whoever their real owner is, if he or she finds out Elmyra is in possession of his or hyenas, she'll be in big trouble," said Marita Hippo.
After giving them scorching hot bathes Elmyra decided to take Bud and Lou on a walk. The two hyenas were tied to leashes as Elmyra walked them. Just then, she spotted her crush, Montana Max. He had also grown a bit taller in the past months too. He was currently wearing a fancy green suit with a green necktie.
"Hi, Monty!" called Elmyra.
"Oh. It's you. I see they released you from the asylum," said Monty coldly.
"Check out my new puppies," said Elmyra. Montana Max saw Bud and Lou.
"Those aren't puppies! They're wild animals! Hyenas to be precise," said Monty.
"But they're so cute," said Elmyra. She hugged Bud and Lou, hard, which caused them to whimper in pain. Monty walked up to the duo of hyenas.
"These two look stupid to me," said Monty. Bud and Lou suddenly bit Monty in the butt cheeks. He screamed as he felt the pain. It was so painful that he jumped high into the air. He fell into a nearby tree.
"Poor Monty. I hope he's not too hurt badly," said Elmyra. Bud and Lou just laughed at Montana Max's misfortune.
At the Acme Acres Park, Fifi along with her mentor, Pepé Le Pew decided to have a picnic with Fifi's friends. She invited Buster & Babs Bunny (No relation), Plucky Duck, Shirley the Loon, Hamton Pig and Little Beeper & Anais the Roadrunner.
"Zanks fahr eenveeting us to ziss peecneec, Fifi and Pepé," said Anais as she took a bite out a bird seed filled sandwich.
"Merci. Ziss ees a good way fahr us to hahng out. You ahlso hahve to zank my mahthair fahr helpeeng me pahck ze food," said Fifi. She devoured a croissant roll topped with melted butter.
"Your mom sure knew what to pack for each of us," said Buster, who was drinking some carrot juice.
"And she remembered to pack lots of food since I eat a lot," said Hamton.
"Your mahthair really knows how to prepahre a deleecious meal. Eet's no wahndair she's a fahmous chef bahck aht hahme," said Pepé.
"I weesh I could've eenvited Furrbahll. But weeth Elmyra bahck, we may see less of heem outside of school. Ahnd eef I try to cahll heem, Elmyra might be ahble to trahce ze cahll bahck to source ahnd find me ahnd keednahp me," said Fifi.
"Hi, fuzzy wuzzy animals," said Elmyra as she along with Bud and Lou came into view.
"Like, speak of the devil," said Shirley.
"Did you miss me?" asked Elmyra.
"Not really," said Babs.
"I certainly deed naht meess you," said Pepé coldly.
"Don't tell me you're still mad at me for dressing up as you, Pepé?" asked Elmyra.
"I ahm steell mahd. You toyed weeth my prahtege's heart just to cahpture hair. A wahmahn's heart ees deleecahte. You of ahll people should know seence you're a wahmahn too," said Pepé. And he turned away from Elmyra.
"Well, check my new puppy wuppies. They're soooooo cute. Bet you're all jealous," said Elmyra. Bud and Lou saw Fifi & Pepé and recognized them as skunks. The two hyenas shrieked and jumped onto Elmyra. "Funny. Why puppies afraid of you, kitties? I thought they'd chase you since they're dogs," said Elmyra.
"Zey know a skunk when zey see one. Ahnd besides, why would we be jealous of a pair of veecious hyenahs?" asked Fifi.
"Vicious what?" asked Elmyra.
"Hyenas. Wild carnivorous animals from Africa and natural enemies of lions. Didn't you see the Disney movie of 'The Lion King'?" asked Hamton.
"Uh . . . no?" replied Elmyra.
"You hahve no idea how dahngerous hyenahs cahn be, Elmyra. Your pahrents ahre going to hahve a cow eef zey see you brought hahme two veecious ahneemahls," said Anais, with concern in her voice. Little Beeper nodded in agreement.
"My parents are going to bring me home a cow?!" asked Elmyra excitedly.
"No, no, no. Hahveeng a cow ees ahnahthair term fahr getteeng mahd. Een othair wahrds, your pahrents will be mahd zat you're een pahssession of hyenahs," said Anais.
"Well you know, I think you and your hyenas make a perfect pair," said Plucky.
"Look's like green duckie wuckie agrees with me," said Elmyra.
"I said that cause all three of you have a low I.Q. You're just as idiotic as your two mangy, stupid, slobbering poachers," said Plucky. He began to laugh. In retaliation, Lou slashed at Plucky. At first, it seemed nothing happened. But suddenly, parts of his sides split open and he deflated. Bud and Lou laughed at Plucky. Most of the other toons were trying not to laugh. Pepé, Fifi and Anais on the other hand, showed concern for Plucky.
"I think I'll show my new puppies to some of my friends from school. Later," said Elmyra. She began to drag Bud and Lou by the leashes.
"Just don't come crying to us if your two 'puppies' eat your other pets," said Plucky as he was attempting to stitch himself back together. Fifi let out a gasp after hearing what Plucky said.
"What's the matter, Fifi?" asked Buster.
"Eet's whaht Plucky just said. Heareeng zat just mahkes me wahrried ahbout Elmyra's pets," said Fifi.
"And why does that concern you?" asked Babs.
"Cause mahst of Elmyra's pets ahre being held ahgainst zeir will. Ahnd eef ze hyenahs eat ahny of zem, zat means zey'll die befahre zey earn zeir freedahm. I'm especially wahrried ahbout Furrbahll," said Fifi.
"Why do you care about him?" asked Plucky.
"All he ever does is try to eat some of out fellow bird and mice students. And besides, he made a mess of my house," said Hamton. Suddenly, Fifi slapped Plucky and Hamton with her tail, knocking them down.
"How dahre you tahlk ahbout Furrbahll like zat! Ze ahbuse he gets ees undeserved! Mahst of ze time, Sweetie stahrts ze cahnfleects, naht Furrbahll! Besides, he's just fahlloweeng hees eensteencts like ahny ahneemahl would! Zat gives you ahll no right to treat eet like a veellainous ahct!" scolded Fifi.
"Fifi's right. She tahld me ahbout whaht Furrbahll goes through ahnd he doesn't deserve to be treated like shit by you," said Anais. Little Beeper nodded in agreement.
"Ahnd eef you ahct like Furrbahll getteeng eaten by zose hyenahs ees no beeg deal, zen you truly ahre heartless," said Pepé. Buster, Babs, Plucky, Shirley and Hamton were ashamed.
"So I'm going to do sahmetheeng ahbout eet," said Fifi. And she left in a huff.
Fifi arrived back to home. "You're hahme early zen I expected, Fifi," said Fleur.
"I know, mahthair. But ziss ees kind of ahn emergency. Elmyra sahmehow gaht a hahld of two hyenahs, sinkeeng zat zey're puppies," said Fifi.
"Hyenahs?" asked Fleur.
"Oui. Whaht's ze phahne numbair to ze Ahcme Ahcres Zoo? I sink zey ahctually cahme frahm zere," said Fifi.
"Here eet ees," said Fleur, showing it to her daughter.
"Merci," said Fifi. She dialed the phone number of the Acme Acres Zoo.
"Hello?" asked the phone operator.
"Bahnjour. I'd like to speak to ze mahnagair cause I hahve a cwancern to speak ahbout," said Fifi. "Okay. I'll go get him," said the phone operator. After waiting about a minute, the Acme Acres Zoo manager was on the phone.
"Hello, this is the Acme Acres Zoo manager. State the purpose of your call," said the Manager.
"Bahnjour. My nahme ees Fifi La Fume. I'm cahlleeng cause sahmehow, ze lahcahl ahneemahl lahveeng eediot, Elmyra sahmehow gaht a hahld of two spahtted hyenahs. Deed ahny of your hyenahs escahpe frahm ze zoo or were stahlen? Ahnd were ahny of zem red?" asked Fifi.
"No. All our hyenas are present and accounted for. And we don't have any red furred hyenas. And we know Elmyra. She's banned from the zoo for trying to get too close to the animals," said the manager.
"So eef ahll your hyenahs ahre aht ze zoo, how deed she get ze two I sahw she hahs?" asked Fifi.
"I don't know. But I do know that somebody will have to confiscate them from her before they kill somebody. You could try animal control or something. Goodbye and have a good day," said the Manager. And he hung up.
"No good. Ze zoo says zey hahve ahll zeir hyenahs," said Fifi.
"Why hahve you becahme wahrried ahbout Elmyra's sahfety ahll of a sudden?" asked Fleur.
"I could cahre less fahr Elmyra eef she becahmes deennair fahr zose hyenahs. Eet's Furrbahll, Tyrahne ahnd sahme of ze othair ahneemahls Elmyra hahs cahptive. Elmyra cahn't keep zose laugheeng cahrneevahres frahm eateeng hair othair pets fahr lahng," said Fifi.
"Saahcrebleu, you're right! Getteeng eaten ahlive by hyenahs ees wahrse zan getteeng keelled by overbeareeng ahffection frahm Elmyra!" said Fleur.
"Wait . . . whaht ahbout Bahtman? He ahnd Ahce might be ahhble to help. I'll hahve Cahlameety mahke a hahmemahde Baht Signahl aht nightfahll," said Fifi.
"Okay. But I sure you know whaht you're doing," said Fleur.
"So do I, mahthair. So do I," said Fifi.
Meanwhile, the Joker and Harley Quinn were on their search for Bud and Lou. They took the smart approach and wore disguises. Besides a trench coat and hat, the Joker wore skin tone colored makeup and a toupee to hide his actual skin and hair colors. First thing they were doing were visiting various animal shelters. They were visiting their third one. The sun was starting to set too. Harley showed a photo of Bud and Lou to the owner. "I'm sorry, but we don't have any hyenas or seen any," said the owner.
"Drat! Another dead end," said Harley. She and the Joker then left the animal shelter. "We're getting nowhere. We have to find my babies before she finds them," said Harley.
"She? She who?" asked the Joker.
"Elmyra Duff, the local animal loving idiot," said Harley. She showed the Joker a photo of her.
"Oh yes. I remember her. I hit her with the Jokermobile a couple of years back when I first fled here. Why are you shaken up?" asked the Joker.
"The majority of the animal kingdom fears her. She always look for new pets for her collection. But she's unaware of the abuse she's inflicting on them," said Harley.
"Why?" asked the Joker.
"She has the I.Q. of a rattle. Some animals have even died from her abusive affection! That's why we have to find my babies immediately!" said Harley.
"I see your point," said the Joker. At that moment, the two clown criminals heard some grumbling. It was Montana Max, limping. His butt was still sore from getting bitten by Bud earlier. He was on his way to his limo.
"Stupid hyenas. If I get some weird disease from them, I'll sue the Duffs," said Monty. Harley Quinn heard what Montana Max said and grabbed him by the shirt.
"Did you say you encountered two hyenas?!" asked Harley.
"What's it to you, lady?" asked Monty.
"They're my hyenas!" said Harley. "So, they're your hyenas! Well, I can sue for the way your hy . . . ," said Monty.
"To Hell with a lawsuit! Where are my hyenas?!" interrupted Harley.
"They're in possession of Elmyra," said Monty. Harley gasped when she heard this.
"What's her address?! WHAT'S HER ADDRESS?!" asked Harley.
"She lives here," said Monty, showing the address to Harley Quinn. Harley then threw Montana Max to the ground.
"Come on, puddin'! We have to hurry before it's too late!" cried Harley. She grabbed Joker by the arm and ran to Montana Max's limo. She threw the driver out and she and the Joker got in. Harley then began to drive the limo, speeding like a maniac.
"Hey! Come back with my limo!" cried Monty. But it was too late. Harley Quinn and the Joker were already beyond his reach.
"Out of the way, moron!" yelled Harley as she caused another car to crash.
It wasn't long before Fifi contacted Calamity Coyote and asked him to help her build a homemade Bat Signal. Calamity ordered an Acme Hero Signal Kit. Once he got the package, he and Fifi went to the roof. Calamity immediately assembled it. It was roughly half the size of the real Bat Signal. He then put the final piece; a bat symbol. He held out a sign that read, "Cross your fingers, Fifi". He flipped the switch and it turned on, illuminating the night sky. In a dark alley, Batman threw two of the Joker's goons into a wall. He then grabbed one of them by the shirt. Ace had the other pinned down and growled menacingly at him. "Where's the Joker?" asked Batman threateningly.
"We don't know! We got separated by that explosion that destroyed our car yesterday!" said Goon #1.
"Then let me ask you this, has he contacted you recently?" asked Batman.
"No, no! He hasn't!" said Goon #2. At that moment, Batman saw the homemade Bat Signal in the sky.
"Odd. Why is there a Bat Signal here? I better check it out," said Batman. He tied up the two goons, threw them into the Batmobile and he drove off to find the source of the signal. On the way, he dropped the two goons off at the Acme Acres Police Station.
"Le yay! Eet wahrked! Zank you fahr help, Cahlameety!" said Fifi as she suddenly started hugging Calamity. The gray coyote got a face full of Fifi's breasts, causing him to get all flustered. Fifi then gave Calamity a big kiss on his nose, leaving a pink lipstick mark. Calamity stood there blinking, earning a giggle from Fifi.
"You better have a good reason for summoning me," said a voice behind the two toons. Fifi and Calamity gasped and saw Batman and Ace were behind them. Batman turned to Calamity. "Did you build that?" asked Batman. Calamity nodded. While Batman had his back turned, Fifi was preparing to spray Batman for lying to her about where Furrball went. "Don't even think about it," said Batman. Fifi yelped since Batman knew what she was going to do without looking. "You're that skunkette I encountered yesterday," said Batman.
Oui. We cahlled cause zere's sahmetheeng zat greatly cwancerns moi," said Fifi.
"What's that?" asked Batman.
"You see, one of my fahrmair clahssmates, Elmyra Duff, being a pet obsessive geerl gaht a hahld of two hyenahs, sinkeeng zey're puppies. Why I'm wahrried ees zat zey might eat sahme of hair othair pets, wheech eencludes sahme of my clahssmates," said Fifi.
"Did you say, two hyenas?" asked Batman.
"Oui," said Fifi.
"Did they have red fur?" asked Batman.
"Did one of them have a green collar and the other had a purple one?" asked Ace.
"Zey do," said Fifi.
"Oh no," said Batman.
"Whaht's ze mahttair?" asked Fifi.
"Those hyenas that Elmyra got a hold of are really Harley Quinn's pet hyenas, Bud and Lou," said Batman.
"Hahrley Quinn, ahs een ze Jahkair's sidekeeck?!" asked Fifi. Calamity held out a sign that read, "Does that mean . . . ?"
"Yes. The Joker and his goons are in town. They got separated when they're car was destroyed by some explosion. I turned two of them to the police before I got here," explained Batman. Calamity held out a sign that read, "That explosion you're referring to was a dynamite trap meant for Little Beeper."
"Where do the Duffs live? If Joker and Harley find out that Elmyra has Harley's pets, the Duffs will be serious danger," said Batman.
"Knowing Harley, if she finds out what Elmyra did to her 'babies', she will do massive retaliation," said Ace.
"Zey live aht ziss ahddress" said Fifi, taking out an outdated Acme Looniversity student directory. She showed Batman the Duffs' home address.
"Then there's no time to waste. Ace and I must get going," said Batman.
"Cahlameety ahnd I ahre cahmeeng too," said Fifi.
"No. The Joker and Harley are not like the villains you've fought. They're homicidal maniacs and will kill anybody who crosses them wrong," said Batman.
"Bud and Lou are dangerous, wild animals. They will tear you to shreds," said Ace.
"But you're fahrgetteeng, I'm ze heroine of ze bahttle of Leelycahve Ceety. I ahlso played a rahle een ze downfahll of bahth Team Mahgma ahnd Team Ahqua," said Fifi. Calamity then took out a sign that read, "And besides, we have superhero egos of our own".
"Really," said Batman, raising an eyebrow.
Fifi La Fume did a really fast ballerina twirl. After the spinning, she was now Scentanna. But she now had a new costume. This time, she was wearing a tuxedo with a black bow tie and a top hat. She wore red lipstick too. "I'm known as the Mystic Maiden of Musk; Scentanna!" said Fifi, speaking with a fake English accent. Calamity then changed into a green, Robin Hood like costume. He held a sign that said, "And I'm Keen Arrow!"
"Scentanna? Keen Arrow?" asked Batman, scratching his head.
"You two are crazy," said Ace.
"Don't forget us!" said a voice. The three turned and saw the voice belonged to Buster as SuperBun. With him was Babs as Wonder Babs.
"SuperBun, Wonder Babs. What are you doing here?" asked Scentanna.
"We came here to help," said Wonder Babs.
"We thought about what you said earlier and you were right. If Furrball died and we dismissed it, we would be considered heartless," said Buster.
"Come on. Let's get going," said Batman. Batman, Ace and Scentanna went into the Batmobile, while SuperBun and Wonder Babs to the sky, carrying Keen Arrow. Unfortunately, the Joker and Harley had already reached the Duff family house. On the way, they picked up the two other goons. Harley had been causing a lot of chaos on the road due to her reckless driving. The limo also had some damage too. When the limo arrived, Harley crashed it into a fire hydrant on the other side of the street, setting it off. If that wasn't enough, Harley parked it illegally. The crash set off the airbags. The Joker, Harley Quinn and their goons exited out of the limo. The Joker's hair was all messed up.
"That's the last time I let you drive," groaned the Joker.
"Shh. We're here," said Harley, pointing to the house. The four crooks crossed to the side of the street where the house was. Using a skeleton key, the Joker unlocked the fence around the house. He then used the same key to unlock the front door. Since the room was so dark, they didn't see the large hole in the floor until . . . "AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAUGH!" screamed the Joker, Harley and the two goons. CRASH! The four criminals crashed to the bottom of the floor. The loud noise was enough to wake up the Duffs along with Furrball. Baby Duff cried of course. After recovering, the Joker and his goons climbed out of the hole. He saw how big it was. "Wow. What a hole," said the Joker. Suddenly, the lights turned on, courtesy of the Duffs. The Duffs screamed seeing who the intruders were.
"The Joker?! Here?! In our house?!" asked Mr. Duff.
"You!" said Harley, pointing to Elmyra.
"Me?" asked Elmyra.
"Yes, I mean you! You have something that belongs to me!" said Harley angrily.
"I do?" asked Elmyra.
"Don't play dumb! You have my hyenas!" said Harley.
"Hyenas?!" asked Mrs. Duff.
"You brought home hyenas?!" asked Duncan.
"I thought they were cute puppies," said Elmyra.
"You idiot! Hyenas are very dangerous animals!" said Amanda.
"Give back Bud and Lou or suffer the consequences!" said Harley.
"But they're my pets! I found them!" objected Elmyra. Harley Quinn growled in frustration. She then saw Furrball and sneered. The female costumed crook grabbed Furrball by the tail, causing him to screech loudly. "Furrball!" cried Elmyra. Once Harley had Furrball in her grasp, she pointed a gun at his head.
"Don't move a muscle or I'll blast this pussycat's brains out!" snarled Harley. The Joker's goons were getting scared at Harley's anger. Even the Joker was starting to look uncomfortable.
"Please, don't hurt my kitty witty!" begged Elmyra.
"If you don't want your kitty witty to get hurt, you will do exactly what I say. The only way you can guarantee Furrball's safety is that you release my babies back into my custody! What's it going to be? My hyenas or your cat?" asked Harley.
"Elmyra, please give her back her hyenas. They're not worth holding onto if it means I'll die," begged Furrball. Elmyra growled angrily before her face turned into a sad frown.
"Alright. I'll take you to them. But please, don't shoot Furrball," said Elmyra. Harley smiled.
"That's a good girl," said Harley. Elmyra then began to lead Harley into the basement. Harley still held onto Furrball. She and the Joker turned to the two goons.
"Make sure the others don't do anything stupid," said the Joker.
"As you wish, boss," said the two goons. They then pointed their own guns at Elmyra's family. Elmyra arrived to the basement, with the Joker, Harley Quinn and Furrball tagging behind. She got out the keys to the pets' cages and began to search for the one for Bud and Lou's cage.
"Furrball, what's going on?" asked Tyrone.
"What are the Joker and Harley Quinn doing here?" asked Johnny.
"Those two hyenas that Elmyra got really belong to Harley Quinn. And if Elmyra doesn't give then back, Harley will shoot me," said Furrball.
"That's terrible!" said Chicken Boo.
"I knew bringing those hyenas was a bad idea to begin with!" said Charlie.
"Harley should just shoot Furrball now!" said Pug.
"I agwee. Dat would be one wess putty tat to deal with," said Sweetie.
"Shut up, Pug and Sweetie!" yelled the other pets. Elmyra finally found the key to Bud and Lou's cage and unlocked it. The two hyenas ran out of the cage to Harley. Once again, they were wearing diapers and baby bonnets. "Bud, Lou, my precious hyenas!" cried Harley. She dropped Furrball onto the ground and hugged her two pets. "Thank goodness I came before she could do something worse happened," said Harley.
"She forced us to be dressed up as babies," said Bud.
"And she force fed us disgusting food and gave us scorching hot baths," said Lou. Even though Harley couldn't understand her hyenas, she could tell by their vocalization that they were distressed. Harley ripped off the diapers & baby bonnets and glared at Elmyra.
"You need to be taught a lesson in what happens to those who abuse my babies! Puddin', restrain her!" snarled Harley.
"Okay," said the Joker. He then grabbed Elmyra.
"Hey! Put me down! What are you doing?!" asked Elmyra.
"I'm going to teach you a lesson you'll never forget! One that'll be burned into that puny mind of yours for eternity!" said Harley, smiling an unpleasant smile. Harley broke open some of the cages containing Elmyra's pets. "Sic' em, boys! Starting with that bunny over there!" said Harley, pointing to Blinky. Bud and Lou charged at the bad bunny snarling. Blinky tried to hop away, but Bud stepped on his fluffy tail. Lou licked his lips and went in for the kill.
"NNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!" screamed Elmyra as she was forced to watch Blinky get devoured alive by Lou. She struggled to break free of the Joker's grip, but it was no use.
"Let's see who to eat next. Ah, yes. That delicious dog," said Bud, eyeing Shep. Shep growled and took a stance to defend himself. Bud then charged at Shep and tackled him. Shrp tried to fight back, but his hyena foe was stronger. Bud bit Shep on the neck and started to suffocate him.
"Not my puppy! NOT MY PUPPY! Won't somebody please save my pets?!" cried Elmyra. Her eyes were starting to tear up at this point. Harley just laughed sadistically as Bud and Lou killed Elmyra's pets, one by one.
As if right on cue, T.I.N.O. (Teen Titans in name only) burst through the window. "Have no fear, the Teen Titans are here!" said T.I.N.O. Robin.
"You're not Robin," said the Joker. He was stepping on Elmyra at this point.
"Sure I'm Robin," said T.I.N.O. Robin.
"The real Robin is taller and had a better looking costume," said the Joker.
"I am the real Robin! I am! I am! I am!" said T.I.N.O. Robin. He was too busy ranting that he didn't notice Joker clicking the trigger on his gun, which caused a bang! message flagpole to spring out The Joker clicked the trigger and his gun fired the flagpole like a gun. It stabbed T.I.N.O. Robin in the heart, sending him flying and pinning to the wall. T.I.N.O. Robin then fell dead. The Joker laughed at the Robin wannabe's death.
"Murderer!" cried T.I.N.O. Starfire. She charged at the Joker. But suddenly, Harley Quinn yanked her by the hair, causing her to yelp.
"Sit down, pinkie!" said Harley. She had her sit down on a whoopee cushion, which actually exploded. It was an explosion whoopee cushion. The explosion blew up most of T.I.N.O. Starfire's lower body. She was now legless and was pathetically crawling as she was dying. "Now that's what I call a blast!" said Harley, before laughing.
"Hey, I come with the puns!" snapped the Joker.
"Oh come on, Mister J. I executed the gag. Don't I get to make the joke?" asked Harley.
"Fine. I'll make an exception for today," said the Joker. T.I.N.O. Raven tried to sneak up on the Joker. But the Clown Prince of Crime was faster. He squirted deadly acid right in T.I.N.O. Raven's face. She screamed as the acid melted her flesh. The Joker laughed at the superheroine wannabe's death. T.I.N.O. Beast Boy transformed into a monkey and ran toward Harley.
"Hey, monkey boy!" said Harley. T.I.N.O. Beast Boy screeched in confusion. "Have a cigar," said Harley, holding out a cigar. T.I.N.O. Beast Boy took the cigar and put it in his mouth. Harley lit the cigar for T.I.N.O. Beast Boy. Seconds later, the cigar exploded and T.I.N.O. Beast Boy was engulfed in the violent explosion. When the explosion subsided, T.I.N.O. Beast Boy's head was gone. He then collapsed to the ground, dead. Harley Quinn and the Joker continued laughing like the maniacs they were.
"You two are going to pay for that!" yelled T.I.N.O. Cyborg. He ran toward the Joker and Harley Quinn, yelling a battle cry. But the Joker was ready for him. When his cybernetic for got close enough, the Joker grabbed T.I.N.O. Cyborg's hand and began zapping him with his electric joy buzzer. T.I.N.O. Cyborg screamed as he was electrocuted. The electricity was enough to overload him til he exploded into pieces.
"Teen Titans? Ha! More like Teen Twits!" sneered the Joker. The Joker and Harley laughed once again.
Outside the Duff house, the Batmobile was just rounding the corner. It then stopped, bumping into Montana Max's limo, damaging it more. Batman and Scentanna jumped out of the car. At that moment, they heard Elmyra's tortured screaming.
"Oh no. Those crazed clowns are here already," said Scentanna.
"Then we better hurry!" said Batman. He along with Ace, Scentanna, SuperBun, Wonder Babs and Keen Arrow rushed to the Duff house. Back in the basement, Bud and Lou were slaughtering another of Elmyra's pets for food. This time, they were eating up a random squirrel she got. The Joker was once again restraining Elmyra by grabbing her. By now, the only pets left who were still alive were Furrball, Tyrone, Charlie Dog, Sweetie Pig, Johnny Pew, Michigan J. Frog, the Hip Hippos, Chicken Boo, Pug and the Xenomorph.
"Who's next?" asked Harley. She then spotted Furrball who was trying to creep away. "Get the cat," said Harley. Bud and Lou giggled as they lumbered toward Furrball. Elmyra let out a horrified scream. Suddenly, the little girl bit the Joker in the arm, causing him to scream in pain. He dropped Elmyra when he began to clutch his arm. Elmyra then grabbed Bud and Lou by the collars, restraining them.
"No! No! I won't let you eat my precious kitty witty! Furrball, run!" cried Elmyra. Furrball started to run upstairs. Suddenly, Harley Quinn slapped Elmyra with the back of her hand.
"Hands off my hyenas, you brat!" snarled Harley. Elmyra recovered. The slap left a scratch on her cheek. And the scratch was caused by a ring that Harley was wearing. But then, for some reason, Elmyra started to laugh. It was low at first, but the laughter grew louder and more hysterical. Harley grinned a devilish grin. "A Joker Venom laced ring. Really comes in handy. Very soon, you'll die with a smile on your face," said Harley. Furrball arrived to the upper floor only for the Joker's goons to point their guns at him. Luckily for him, Batman, Ace Scentanna, Keen Arrow, SuperBun and Wonder Babs came crashing through the window. Batman kicked the two goons, knocking them down.
"Batman! Thank goodness you're here!" said Duncan.
"Where's the Joker, Harley and your sister?" asked Batman. It was at that moment the heroes started hearing Elmyra's uncontrollable laughter.
"It's coming from the basement!" said Scentanna.
"As I feared, Elmyra's been exposed to Joker's lethal Joker Venom. I must give her the anti-venom right away," said Batman. But before Batman could run to the basement, the Joker's two muscular goons grabbed at him.
"Where do you think you're going, rodent?!" asked Goon #3.
"You ain't helping that animal abusing brat!" said Goon #4. He then delivered a punch across Batman's face. Before the goon could attack Batman again, he felt a sharp pain up his butt crack and screamed like a sissy girl. For Keen Arrow shot him in the butt with one of his arrows. Batman then grabbed at the goon #3 and threw him to the ground. Keen Arrow held up a sign that read, "I'll handle these two thugs. You go down to the basement."
"Thanks," said Batman. Batman, Ace, Scentanna and the two bunnies ran down the stairs to the basement. The two goons recovered and saw Keen Arrow. He did the "come here" gesture taunt. The two goons charged, but Keen Arrow fired again. Poor Elmyra continued to laugh against her will. Right now, Bud and Lou were attempting to eat Johnny Pew, who was standing on top of the Hip Hippos' cages.
"Back! Back you savages!" said Johnny as he waved a broken cage piece at them, If Elmyra hadn't slathered me with tomato juice today, I would be able to stink them out!, thought Johnny. Suddenly, Scentanna fired a magic fireball that burned at the Joker and Harley's butts. The two crazed clowns screamed as they felt the heat of the flames. The two ran to find water or a fire extinguisher. Batman ran toward Elmyra, but Bud and Lou stood in his way, snarling. Ace threw some batarangs at Bud and Lou, knocking them down.
"Go! Administer the antitoxin! Ace and I will hold laughing mutts off!" said Wonder Babs as she got out her lasso. Batman ran to Elmyra's side and got out the needle injector. He injected the antitoxin and Elmyra stopped laughing. She then passed out as the antitoxin started to take effect. Batman let out a sigh of relief. The Joker and Harley had put out the flames on their butts using water from two animal water bowls. Harley growled angrily when she saw Batman saved Elmyra. At that moment, Keen Arrow, Furrball and Duncan were thrown down the stairs by the Joker's goons. In the process, Michigan J. Frog's cage was destroying, freeing the singing frog.
"Back for more, ehh?" asked Scentanna. The goons charged at the heroes. However, Scentanna kicked Goon #4, knocking him into the Xenomorph's cage, bumping into it. Before Goon #4 could get back up, the Xenomorph stuck its spear-like tail through the bars, impaling him. Blood gushed from his chest as well as his mouth. The savage alien brought him very close to the bars. The Xenomorph snarled before stabbing the goon in the head with its inner jaw, killing him. The Xenomorph pulled its tail out of goon #4's chest and he fell on his face, dead. The Joker, Harley and the remaining goon were shocked at what they saw. The heroes and villains resumed fighting. Scentanna fought the Joker, while Batman dealt with Harley. Ace, SuperBun, Wonder Babs and Keen Arrow fought the remaining goon and the hyenas. Duncan went back upstairs to get his sister to safety. The goon tried to punch SuperBun, but he blocked his fist with his superior strength. The super powered bunny began to twist his hand, causing the goon to yelp. After that, SuperBun punched him in the gut, knocking him unconscious. He then froze him in a block of ice with his snow bunny breath. Ace headbutted Lou, knocking him into Bud. The two toppled to the ground. Keen Arrow fired an arrow at Bud and Lou that exploded into knock out gas. The two hyenas coughed as they fell unconscious. Wonder Babs then used her lasso to bind them. As the heroes and villains were fighting, Michigan J. Frog began to hop away, singing part of "Think" by Aretha Franklin. The part where he would sing, "freedom" that is. The Joker dodged Scentanna's magic blasts as they fought. Suddenly, the Clown Prince of Crime whacked the superheroine with a broke cage bar. Scentanna fell to the ground. The Joker raised the sharpened end of the bar. "So long, stinky!" said the Joker. Without warning, Furrball jumped onto the Joker's face and began clawing him. He screamed as the blue cat attacked him. The Joker also dropped the cage bar he was holding. Scentanna was witnessing Furrball attacking the Joker.
"Oh my. He's so brave," said Scentanna, blushing.
"Harley, get this mangy cat off of me!" cried the Joker.
"One pussycat pancake coming right up!" said Harley, taking out her mallet. She raised her hammer, ready to strike Furrball. Furrball saw it coming and jumped away from the Joker. CLONK! Harley hit the Joker in the head instead. The Clown Prince of Crime yelped as he got hit. The blow knocked out some of his teeth, gave him a black eye, a bloody nose and part of his face to swell. The Joker fell to the ground. "Oh no! What have I done?!" cried Harley. She ran to the Joker's side. "Mister J! Say something! Speak to me!" cried Harley.
"R2, fire up the converters," said the Joker in his daze. He then fell unconscious. Harley glared at Furrball, who smiled nervously.
"You'll pay for that, you mangy fleabag!" snarled Harley. She charged at Furrball with her mallet. But then, Scentanna fired a stink blast that melted her hammer into green goo. "Uh-oh!" said Harley. After that, SuperBun and Wonder Babs executed a double punch that knocked Harley out.
"That was for fantasizing us as corpses," said SuperBun. Johnny Pew got a good look at Scentanna. His eyes turned into red hearts and his tongue panted lustfully. In addition, he had a nosebleed.
"Why hello, gorgeous," said Johnny. He went up to Scentanna and began to hold her hand. "Say, maybe when you're not busy fighting crime or doing magic tricks, maybe you and I can get to know each other?" asked Johnny. Fifi still remember how badly Johnny Pew treated her that one summer. In response, Scentanna fired something from her eyes, which froze the male skunk in a block of ice. Those were eye blasts of ice she fired from her eyes.
"Looks like she gave you the cold shoulder," said WonderBabs. She giggled due to the pun she made. Very soon, the police arrived to arrest the Joker, Harley, Bud & Lou and the remaining goon. Hector the Bulldog was among one of the cops.
"Were there any other casualties besides that goon that was killed by the Duffs' pet alien?" asked Hector.
"Shep the Dog, a pet rabbit, a pet squirrel, a Norwegian Blue and more," said Duncan. He handed Hector a full list of the pets that were killed. Everybody watched as Elmyra was escorted into an ambulance on a stretcher.
"We'll need to examine your daughter for any long term side effects of that Joker Toxin," said the medic.
"Okay," said Mr. Duff. The Duffs could only watch as the ambulance drove away, carrying their daughter. For some reason, Keen Arrow had a look of guilt for some reason.
The next day, Furrball went to school as usual. But when he got into the classroom, he was suddenly startled when the majority of the students let out a cheer. Professor Pepé Le Pew was present too. Calamity Coyote wasn't present for some reason. "There's our Joker busting hero!" said Buster.
"Me . . . a hero?!" asked Furrball.
"Word traveled fast at how you played a major part in the Clown Prince of Crime's arrest!" said Gogo.
"Luck was on your side this time!" said Shirley. The students began chanting Furrball's name. Furrball couldn't help but beam.
"Settle down. Settle down," said Pepé. Everybody quieted down. Fifi approached Furrball. She was wearing a pink shirt that exposed both her cleavage & midriff and a blue skirt.
"Zat wahs very brahve of you to ahttahck ze Jahkair like zat. I deedn't sink you'd ahctually live to tell ze tahle," said Fifi.
"I couldn't let her kill Scentanna," said Furrball.
"Furrbahll, zere's sahmetheeng I wahnt to ahsk you," said Fifi.
"What's that?" asked Furrball.
"Ees eet pahsseeble ahftair school, we cahn go on a peecneec, just you ahnd me?" asked Fifi.
"You invite me . . . to a picnic?" asked Furrball.
"Oui. I wahnted to eenvite you to one I hahd weeth my friends yesterday. But eef I cahlled you by phahne, I deedn't wahnt Elmyra to trahce ze cahll to find out where I live. So, seence we're bahth here, eet's sahfe to ahsk. Will you ahccept my eenveetahtion?" asked Fifi. Furrball thought for a moment.
"Okay. I'd be happy to have a picnic with you," said Furrball. The next thing Furrball knew, he found himself being embraced by Fifi. And once again, Furrball's face was getting pressed against her beautiful bosom.
"Merci, merci, merci, Furrbahll! I knew you wouldn't let me down!" cried Fifi happily. And then, the purple skunkette began to give Furrball a big kiss on his lips. All the other students' eyes widened and their mouths hung open. Pepé just smiled. Fifi ended the kiss when her lips detached from Furrball's with a loud POP! Furrball's lips were stained with a pink lipstick kiss. The blue cat's eyes turned into pink hearts and his tail stiffened. Not to mention the goofy grin on his face. Fifi La Fume giggled at Furrball's reaction. But then, Fifi had a puzzled look.
"Is something the matter, Fifi?" asked Furrball.
"Oh nahtheeng. Nahtheeng aht ahll," fibbed Fifi. Ze tahste of Furrbahll's leeps when I keessed heem . . . eet mahtches zat of zat blue skunk hunk I wahnt to dahte. Could eet be . . . ? Nahh, zat's too fahrfetched, thought Fifi.
"Furrbahll, I know zat we nahrmahlly dahn't show cwancern fahr Elmyra, but whaht deed ze dahctor mean ahbout lahngterm effects on hair?" asked Anais.
"I don't know. Maybe small hints of insanity and possibly brain damage. What I'm worried about is that because she saw some of her pets slaughtered before her eyes, she's probably going to become more pet obsessive to replace the dead ones," said Furrball.
"Then we best keep our guard up," said Buster.
"Yes, you should," said Pepé.
Meanwhile, Montana Max was looking for his stolen limousine. "It's gotta be around here somewhere!" said Monty. As if right on cue, he saw a police tow truck towing away his wrecked limo.
"Hey! Hey! Stop the truck!" cried Monty as he ran after the two truck. The tow truck then stopped and the policeman got out.
"You have a problem, son?" asked the Cop.
"That's my limo you're towing!" said Monty.
"Is it now? Well, young man, since it's your car, I'm gonna have to press charges for the recent offenses you've done driving it," said the Cop.
"What offenses?" asked Monty.
"Road rage, speeding through red lights, parking in an illegal space . . . ," said the Cop. As the cop continued to list the charges, Montana Max let out a frustrated scream that echoed through Acme Acres.
(Insert "Batman the Animated Series" Ending Theme)
Gag Credits #1: This episode was sponsored and funded by Wayne Enterprises.
Gag Credits #2: Cancel Culture, you may have forced WB to stop using Pepé Le Pew, but I won't give in. Pepé is staying in my stories and you can't do anything about it!
(Furrball appears and roars to the viewers (think the MGM lion) and apologizes by letting out a soft meow.)
Sneak Peek
On the next episode of "Fifi's New Tiny Toon Adventures", first, in "To Cheer Up a Coyote", Calamity Coyote starts to feel guilty for Harley Quinn's hyenas killing some of Elmyra's pets. So it's up to Fifi La Fume, Buster & Babs Bunny (No relation) and Furrball to cheer him up. Then, in "At Last, Lightning Rodriguez", there's a new speedster in town and he's the protégé of Speedy Gonzales. He quickly develops a rivalry with Little Beeper and gains a crush on Fifi La Fume. Unfortunately, two alley cat bullies of Furrball who want to eat Lightning kidnap Fifi to use her as ransom to get Lightning to surrender. Will Fifi and her friends show Calamity that the death of some of Elmyra's pets is not his fault? Can Lightning and Little Beeper set aside their rivalry and rally the other toons to save Fifi from the two alley cats' clutches? Find out, in "Coyotes, Mice and Cats, Oh My!" on Fifi's New Tiny Toon Adventures!
I hope you all enjoyed reading this crossover of Tiny Toon Adventures and Batman the Animated Series. There will be future crossovers with BTAS in this series sometime in the future. First short of the next episode will deal with the aftermath of the events of this episode as you read by this preview. I wanted to originally make it a full episode, but had trouble trying to make it "half hour" length. So, I decided to pair it with Lightning's debut episode. So see you next time.