Sleep didn't come to him that night. He kept watching Natasha and listening to her heartbeat, but it didn't seem like she had another nightmare. He was just so confused and had no idea what to do. Had she been dreaming about something that had happened to her? Was it a memory? Was she starting to remember? Had she called for him on Vormir and he hadn't come for her? A part of him wished that it wasn't a memory because he couldn't handle failing her again.

But were her memories slowly starting to come back to her? Did the Soul Stone lose its hold on her? Would this charade be over soon? He really hoped so. Natasha wouldn't be in any danger anymore if she remembered and could protect herself again. They could go home and Natasha could see her loved ones.

The sun was was rising and Natasha began to stir next to him and blinked her eyes slowly open. "Good morning." She smiled sleepily at him. Her smile did wonders to his worried mind. It calmed him a bit.

"Good morning. How are you?"

"Good. No more nightmares." Her smile got wider. "It's cute that you're worrying about me, but it was just a nightmare. Once I dreamed about a giant purple man with some golden glove and there's no way that he was real. It's just dreams. I know they can't hurt me."

Thanos. She had been dreaming about Thanos. She was remembering in her dreams. He tried not to show anything, but it was so hard. How long would it take until she remembered consciously?

"Are you hungry?" He asked her instead and she nodded. "I'll make you breakfast after I checked the security footage."

"I can make breakfast." She objected

"Let me spoil you." He kissed her softly. He wanted Natasha to take it easy today. "We'll have breakfast in bed. We can stay all day in bed."

"Really?" She was beaming at him. "I'd love that."

"It's Sunday, the official stay in bed day."

"You've clearly never worked in a bakery before." Natasha chuckled and cupped the back of his neck to pull him towards her. She kissed him until her lips were swollen and red. He was sure his lips looked the same.

Steve reluctantly left Natasha and the bed to get downstairs. He went through the security footage of the night, only seeing animals, and checked the perimeter. Everything worked just fine and he went back inside to make them breakfast. He decided to go with french toast using the rest of Natasha's bread.

They had coffee and french toast in bed, Natasha complimenting his cooking skills that were still pretty much non-existent. He wanted to bring the used dishes downstairs, but Natasha objected and brought them back into the kitchen.

She came back with a mischief gleam in her eyes and told him to lie down on the bed. He did as he was told and Natasha crawled on top of him. She brushed soft kisses against his lips, cheeks and neck. The longer she was kissing him, the braver she got. Her hands traveled all over his upper body, his shirt long gone, and her lips followed the way her hands traced. Natasha smiled against his skin every time his breath hitched. There was nothing that compared to Natasha touching him like this. She treated him with so much care and love. He'd never felt more alive.

She moved to straddle his waist and smiled down on him. He just had to touch her so he put his hands on her waist, his thumbs disappearing underneath her shirt, caressing her. Her skin was so smooth and soft. He couldn't get enough of the feeling of her.

Natasha grabbed the hemline of her pajama top and pulled it over her head. He tried his best, but his jaw still went slack and his girl noticed it by the way she was grinning at him.

"You're so beautiful." He breathed out and her grin changed into a soft smile.

"Thank you, honey." She leaned down to kiss him. "So are you."

They got lost in their kisses and each other, and soon the rest of their clothing joined their shirts on the bedroom floor. Steve couldn't remember a time where he felt this good, the way Natasha was kissing and touching him set his whole body on fire and he just loved the soft sighs and moans she was giving him when she allowed him to explore her beautiful body with his mouth and hands. They didn't sleep with each other, the time wasn't right yet, but they still found ways to show their love and to bring each other immense pleasure. Nothing he'd experienced before could compare to the feel and touch of her.

Natasha gave him a dopey smile and snuggled closer to him. He had his arms wrapped around her and she was lying on top of him. Steve was still on cloud nine and grinning back at her.

"This was really great." She sighed happily.

"It was." He agreed and kissed her slowly.

"Even though we didn't go all the way." Natasha cupped his cheek. "Thank you for not pushing me to go further."

"I would never do that."

"I know." Natasha smiled up at him. "And I'm really glad that it's you that I'm experiencing it with. You make me feel good in ways I can't really explain." She started to yawn. "Oh, sorry."

"Don't be, my love. Close your eyes and get some sleep." He whispered softly and Natasha's eyes fell shut. Her heartbeat and breathing soon told him that she had fallen asleep. He buried his nose in her perfect hair and her lovely smell and the sound of her steady heartbeat lulled him to sleep.

Steve came back from his morning perimeter check and he was frustrated to say the least. One of the motion sensors wasn't working anymore and he knew that he had no stuff here to fix it. He hadn't seen any replacement parts when they'd first arrived here and he'd checked the supplies. He had to drive to the next town to buy what he needed which meant that he had to leave Natasha alone or take her with him. He didn't want to go, but he had to. Every motion sensor had to fucking work.

He opened the door and walked inside and Natasha was already jumping into his arms and pressed a sweet kiss to his lips.

"Hi." She was beaming at him and his heart fluttered.

"Hi." He laughed. "I like this kind of greeting."

"Good." She chuckled and kissed him again. She studied him for a moment. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing. Well not nothing." He sighed and let her back down. "One of the sensors isn't working. Don't worry. No one did anything to it. It wasn't sabotage. I think the rain of the last days damaged it. I need to drive to town to get the replacement part."

Natasha's face lit up. "Can I come with?"

He didn't want her to come with him, but he also didn't want her to stay here alone. It was safer for her to be with him, but there was the risk that someone could see her. But alone at the cabin she was completely defenseless.

"Yes." He said eventually. "But we need to disguise ourselves a little bit. Wear hats and sunglasses. It's cold, but sunny. So we won't stand out."

"Hats and sunglasses?" Natasha shook her head in amusement. "It's pretty obvious you were a soldier and not a spy."

For a moment he thought that she'd remembered something, but it looked like it was a just some joke.

"And you should wait in the car."

Natasha didn't look happy with that, but nodded eventually. "Okay."

They had breakfast and then left to drive into town. Natasha's hair was mostly covered by her hat and scarf and he really hoped that no one would take a closer look at her. The next town was 30 miles away and quite small. Steve hoped that most people would be at work by now and not pay attention to them. The town was right by the highway, so he figured that they were used to strangers and wouldn't take a second look at them.

He parked near the appliance store and gave Nat a quick kiss.

"I'll be right back, sweetheart. I try to make it quick."

Natasha smiled softly. "Okay."

He looked around and the streets were thankfully almost empty. Most people seemed to be at work or home. He left the car and walked inside the store, hoping to find the replacement part without any help. The less he talked with people, the better. He found the chip after a few minutes and decided to buy a couple more just in case. A bored teenager was sitting behind the register, barely paying attention to him while he scanned the items. Usually Steve would find this kind of behavior rude, but today he was very happy about it. The kid didn't seem to recognize him.

Steve left the store without running into any other people and quickly walked to the car. Natasha was right where he left her, but something seemed off when he got inside the vehicle.

"Everything okay?"

"Yeah." Her smile didn't reach her eyes. "Just got a bit of a headache."

"Oh, no. We'll be soon at the cabin and you can lie down." He said and Natasha nodded.

They didn't talk during the drive back to the cabin and Steve worried about Natasha. He wanted her to remember so desperately, but he didn't want her to suffer. She was staring out of the window and he prayed that she wasn't in too much pain.

Natasha immediately went upstairs and Steve went outside to fix the motion sensor. He was no Tony Stark or Scott Lang, but he managed to repair it. The light turned from red to green, telling him that it was working again. It had taken him twenty minutes to get it going again, he really was no Tony Stark. Tony would have fixed it in seconds. He checked the other sensors and they were all still working, and he went back to the cabin.

Natasha was coming down the stairs with a duffel bag slung over her shoulder and stared at him with wide eyes like he'd caught her. What was happening? Did she want to go back to Betty? Fury hadn't given his okay for them to return, it wasn't safe yet.

"Everything okay?"

"I'm leaving." Natasha announced and walked down the rest of the stairs. "I can't stay here anymore."

"We can't leave yet." He told her truthfully. "It's not safe."

She looked angry for some reason and Steve had no idea why. Something was wrong, but he didn't know what.

"I'm not staying here with you any longer." She gave him a pointed look. "Steve."

He was pretty sure he was having a heart attack. Could he even get one? Did she remember? Was it finally over? Did she want to go home? See Liho and her sister?

"What did you just call me?"

"You really are Steve Rogers, aren't you? Not Grant Murphy." He had used his mother's maiden name as his last name. "And I'm Natasha Romanoff."

"You remembered?" He asked hopefully. Was it finally over? Could they go home now?

"No." She pulled something out of the duffel bag. "I found this in town when I sneaked out of the car to take a quick stroll." She held up a beat up magazine called The unauthorized Avengers Magazine with his face on the cover. Fuck. "You knew this whole time who I was! That I'm a killer! You lied to me this whole fucking time!"

He stepped towards her and she moved back. This wasn't happening. It just couldn't.

"Don't touch me! I don't ever want to see you again. They described you as an honorable man, but you're just a fucking liar!" She had tears in her eyes. "What was this to you? Some cruel trick? Did I ever do something to you that made you lead me on like this? Take advantage of me!"

"Nat, sweetheart!"

"Don't fucking call me that! You have no right!" She threw the magazine against him and walked past by him. "You're going to let me go and you're going to stay the fuck away from me!"

"Please let me explain!" He begged her and ran after her, she was already by the door grabbing the car keys. "Please, I'll tell you everything. I was just trying to protect you! I love you!"

"I don't believe a word you're saying. Everyone's been lying to me since I woke up and I just don't get why. I'll find the answers on my own. I can't trust anyone. That I do know."

She opened the door and didn't turn around to look at him. Steve was glued to his spot, his body frozen and his mind in shock. He had no idea what he was supposed to do. He had no clue how she'd even found that goddamn magazine and why it hadn't triggered anything. Nothing made sense.

What he did know was that Natasha hated him now and that she was still in danger. He couldn't let her go, even though it wasn't what Natasha wanted and that it would make her hate him even more. And another thing he knew for sure, the worst thing, he'd lost Natasha. Possibly forever.