Why am I here.
What is here. Does it matter.
No. Maybe. I don't know. Does it.
No. Maybe. I don't know.
The day sun was brighter today than usual. It reminded me of going to the beach, but there was nothing of the characteristic tangy smell or freshness of the ocean warding off the heat to draw that comparison otherwise. Yet, it persisted.
The figures, mismatched all, continued to puzzle me with their presence. And like every other time I found myself unable to even ask what they were. Where I was. What this place was. And where we were going.
It didn't take long for the train to stop again. I had expected it this time. It's all the damn thing seemed to be good for, stopping, picking up some other strange character and starting again to a road which stretched farther than I could fathom by this point.
The man who boarded stood in stark contrast to the previous two, though it wasn't like they were following any sort of pattern in the first place. Tall, much taller than me, broad across the chest, the most striking feature was his suit and face however. A white cap adorned with several gold ornaments stood atop his head, his body covered by a calf-length white coat, also ornamented, and white pants. His jaw was chiseled, his hair black while his eyes were a piercing, if not very vibrant green.
He passed me and took a seat next to the old man, exchanging a brief nod with him and the...younger girl? His age was difficult to tell. The other man shared no interaction with him.
And yet, no one noticed the shifting un-person on the end. Or the shadow. Again. Once more, I was left wondering if I was crazy, or if they were. The answer likely lay somewhere in the middle.
"Sup."
"Dude, did you get dragged out of bed?" Toji commented bluntly.
"I don't sleep well after Angel fights," I replied, deciding it was as good an explanation as any for the strange dreams I was having. I never seemed to remember them either way, but they sure had a way of sapping away restful sleep and rest time in general.
"How could you not sleep well knowing you have such an awesome thing to look forward to everyday?" Kensuke chimed in, always enthusiastic to point out how well I supposedly had it.
"Maybe when you have the weight of two other people sitting on your pelvis you'll know."
"Sorry," Shinji blurted out.
"So what did you do with the Red Devil?" Toji asked.
"That's a new one," I said, knowing it really wasn't. Well if multiverse theory still worked here it wasn't anyway. "And what do you mean by what we did with her?"
"I mean, it took how long for recovery teams to pick you guys up? I thought maybe you were getting a bit cheeky..."
"Toji!" Shinji exclaimed, exasperated.
"Jesus man, we just met the chick. I'd at least have asked her out on a date first," I said, trying to mask my similar level of bafflement. Despite having accustomed to him over the months, the bluntness of the most hardheaded teenager in all of Tokyo-3 still caught you off guard sometimes. As did his dirty thoughts.
"Yeah, yeah, whatever. Where's she supposed to be anyway?"
"I have no idea," I feigned. "She just went away after the post-mission debriefing and chastisement."
"Wait, they seriously gave you guys lip after that battle? After you totally destroyed that giant fish thing?" Toji asked, genuinely seeming surprised. I'd almost be caught off guard if I didn't remember how naïve he still was towards most of the things going on behind Nerv, even on a superficial level.
"Of course we were berated, stooge," cut a voice before either me or Shinji could utter a single vowel. Seemingly having teleported behind us, the redheaded menace that was the Second Child walked forwards, triggering some kind of base instinct that made us shift out of her path. "My co-pilots prevented me from scoring a perfect kill."
"Yeah, while you were in my Eva. Sat on my lap," I replied callously. Much as I knew how this shtick played out, I wasn't about to let it simmer without biting back. Especially since the reminder brought back painful memories of uncomfortably squished bladders.
"Only because my Eva was stuck in the bottom of the oceans, courtesy of checking out your unfinished prototype, Fourth," she said, with a hmpf for emphasis.
"Whatever. What brings you here anyway?" I said, trying to dial down the hostility somewhat.
"Well, while I personally think it's stupid, according to Misato I need to have "proper socialization" with my "peers"," she said, while making mocking gestures with her face, imitating a very exaggerated version of our guardian. "Basically, she enrolled me in high school with you dorks."
I could see Toji's rising anger, so preemptively I shot Kensuke a glance and a finger wag that told him to show those photos he'd taken of girls in the changing rooms...somehow. The dude sure could be creepy sometimes, but he had his uses, as he distracted his fellow Stooge with some admittedly extremely questionable pictures.
"So, what's up Fourth?" Asuka replied in an uncharacteristically saccharine tone.
"Not much, how about you?" I replied, wanting to come off as nonchalant. But despite that, there was something in the air. Only me, her and Shinji left in that portion of the school yard, all the other students seemingly giving us our space. Three pilots in one place, and there a was a definite unspoken tension for a split second. Something left lingering from our synchronization, maybe?
And just as soon as it had begun, it ended. Asuka crossed her arms and turned her back on us.
"Oh, just wondering when we'll get to be a complete squad," the words left her somewhat forcefully.
"Ayanami," Shinji said, softly.
"Yeah, where is the famous First Child?"
"Probably hanging around the yard. She's usually on her own, somewhere," I replied.
"Probably? Do you not know or something?" she said as she turned to face again, looking incredulous.
"She kinda...keeps to herself," Shinji piped in.
"Yah, Rei isn't the most sociable person," I added.
"So what? Do you just ignore a fellow pilot?"
"Well..."
I heard something she spoke in German then. Nothing I could grasp, aside from the word "idiots", though that was to be expected.
"Am I going to be surrounded by weirdos here? Fine, I'll introduce myself on my own," she said while marching away.
I exchanged glances with Shinji, and somewhat of a mutual understanding passed between us. Whatever was going to happen between the redheaded German and the mysterious pilot of Unit 00, it was best not to ignore it. So we strove after our fellow pilot as she went through the school yard, trying to pinpoint the dash of bright blue that would give away Rei Ayanami's location.
And before long, she did just that, keeping up her bravado-filled walk up until being right in front of Rei, a seemingly good-natured smile on her face.
For her part, the First Child was doing much of what I'd think would be standard by now, eating her lunch alone in a more secluded area of the yard.
"Rei Ayanami," Asuka proclaimed loudly, and right away I felt myself cringing slightly in anticipation. This would probably go the exact same I thought it would. "Pilot of Eva Unit 00?"
"Yes?" Rei didn't even look up from the meal she was eating...which I'd only just realized she hadn't touched at all. Something about that unsettled me.
"Pilot of Evangelion Unit 02, Asuka Langley Soryu!" she said, while pointing to herself with her thumb. "Let's be good friends!"
"Why?"
"For convenience of course!"
Definitely full blown uncomfortableness now.
"If I'm ordered to," Rei replied sharply, unintentionally signaling the end of the conversation. Asuka's face was a mixture of her previous smile, and a grimace.
"What a strange girl," she couldn't help but get out.
"Makes sense, only weirdos are chosen to be pilots," Toji said, right behind us straight away, scaring the crap out of both me and Shinji.
"Bro, what the Hell?"
"What?" he said, having acquired a soda bottle with a straw on it that he was using liberally. It was only when I turned back to face him that I saw a huge crowd gathered behind us. It wasn't the exact same circumstances, but nonetheless.
The more things change, the more they stay the same...
I hoped that sentiment only went for some things.
"A report from 0600 hours showed a massive underwater object moving across the Pacific towards Japanese shorelines," Ritsuko said, as another slide moved to show various observations of the said "object", ranging from sonar to blurry photography captured by drones. "At 0930 hours, MAGI analysis confirmed the pattern. It's blue."
"So the next Angel is already here..." Shinji mused to himself.
"For this operation we'll be deploying all available Evas. However," Misato turned to face me and Rei. "Kano, your Eva has yet to be calibrated for operation. While it performed admirably during it's first combat drop, we'd rather not try our luck with it being a new test type for the Evangelion template moving forwards. Rei, while your piloting capabilities are noted, Unit 00 is not yet in acceptable shape from the last battle. So..."
Misato turned to pilots of the hour, and immediately I felt guilty knowing where this all led.
Something I've been doing a lot lately.
"You two will be responsible for the success of this mission," Misato told Shinji and Asuka, the later of whom was positively beaming. "Our defensive grid after the last battle is still operating at a severely decreased capacity, even as we're rebuilding. Less than 26% of Tokyo-3's armament is available to us, so we'll be engaging right as the target breaches the surface. Kill it before it has any chance to advance further."
"Roger!" we all replied in unison.
I couldn't help but repeat that phrase. That same damn phrase, every time, inspired a dreaded feeling in my gut. But in these situations, there wasn't much you could end up thinking when you were in my position.
I know how this ends.
Whenever something was about to go wrong, it told me of the inevitable conclusion. It stood in the back of my mind, a reminder that as much as I could do, some things were bound to always occur as they had. And never was it more prevalent than during battles. When I knew the exact motions. When I had all the tools to solve them so quickly but no way of expressing it.
And so it was, the very same feeling gripped me as I watched Asuka and Shinji bickering while being deployed onto the beach.
"Pah, my very first assignment and I get to deploy alongside the lame geek. This should've been a lone mission. I can perfectly handle it myself," came the all too familiar words that baffled most of the present bridge crew, as well as Shinji.
"What? Just how overconfident are you?" Shinji replied, flabbergasted. "You haven't even fought an Angel before now."
"I killed that last one just fine didn't I?"
"With our help!"
"Oh yeah, as if you losers even did anything. The Fourth doesn't even know how to operate his own Eva!"
Despite not being there, and knowing what the whole charade was about, it still stung a little to hear that. I thought we'd set up a good team foundation, but it was clear now how much work would have to be done before anything solid came out of it.
Misato clearly wasn't having a good time with the bickering either, sighing almost imperceptibly at the sight of her charges. She looked ready to intervene when Makoto shouted from his monitor.
"Target is emerging!"
"Right!" Misato snapped. "Asuka, Shinji, Evas in position. You're about to come face-to-face with it."
"Roger!" they both replied. Though despite the show of obedience, I noticed Asuka moving slightly further, slightly faster.
The Angel emerged from the depths, a gargantuan bipedal figure with arms risen to the heavens as if in perpetual prayer, colossal body split between light grayish-purple and a deep blue, with the exception of it's ribs, Core and split face mask. All it did initially was take slow, deliberate steps from the water even as the Evas came closer to it.
Then Asuka broke off into a mad dash towards it.
"Asuka!" Misato shouted.
"What are you doing?" Shinji called after her.
"I'm tired of waiting around. It's literally sitting right there like the big, dumbass beast it is! I'm taking my chance, right now!"
"Slow down you dumb rookie!" Shinji began matching her pace, but Asuka was already far in front.
"Engaging!" she yelled as she jumped forward, her field cackling as it met the Angel's own. After a tense few seconds, the two barriers neutralized each-other, and Asuka expertly avoided a flashing blink from the Angel's death mask that vaporized a far off mountain. Her Progressive Spear shot forward, bisecting the Angel vertically.
"Hah!" Asuka's voice came through the intercoms, boast, validation and relief all in one. "How's that for a rookie, eh Third?"
"No...no way," came Shinji's dumbstruck reply.
I swallowed. Hard. Now came the pain.
"Asuka, don't get too cocky. Confirm the kill first," Misato snapped, though I couldn't help but notice the newfound confidence in her stature. Not that she ever lacked it, but she really did seem to believe it was done just like that. What was surprising was the rest of the bridge crew seemed to be acting similar.
How can yo-can you not tell it's still alive?!
Of course, as if to purposefully answer that question, the two halves still on screen began to twist and writhe with unnatural movements.
"MAGI have confirmed the blue pattern is still active!" Ritsuko cried out.
I don't think we need the MAGI to see that!
"Asuka!" Misato and Shinji said almost at the same time.
"Scheisse! What the Hell is it doing?"
Finally, the two halves became the two twins, the orange and silver behemoths. And then they charged.
The following few hours involved of around of fumbling around attempting to retrieve the Evas while nearby a fusion detonation that dwarfed the nuclear fire that had befallen the country during the previous global conflicts incinerated a good portion of the Angel's biomass. All in all, it was a rather eventful day, but as expected I got to sit through the debriefing where Fuyutsuki gave both Shinji and Asuka crap.
So I heard about the day in great detail. Far more so than in the show. At an inordinate length.
It became grating after a while.
"This is all your fault!" Asuka said once we were out of earshot of the superior, who themselves were packing up.
"What? Me?! I'm not the one who charged in there without a plan!"
"You didn't help at all!"
"How am I supposed to help when you keep acting like you can handle anything on your own?!"
Oof...bit on the nose there.
"Ladies, please," I got out instead. Joking around was basically a 50/50 split between softening the situation or making it even worse.
"Buzz off Fourth. You're not involved in this."
And that made it pretty evident which one it had been this time.
"I think I'm pretty damn involved when you two nearly got us all killed, almost got Misato demoted, and had the number two of Nerv himself chew you out."
"As if you could've done any better."
"Maybe not. Probably not, even. But you guys are literally at each-other's throats 24/7. Is it any wonder you didn't help each-other at all, but instead just harmed the operation? Asuka, you're too damn assertive. Brashness will only serve to get your head torn off. And Shinji, you're not assertive enough. You end up getting roped into whatever is happening."
Fortunately, I'd finally managed to get those words out. I'd been meaning to say them for some time now, but the opportunity had never presented itself. Unfortunately, they very clearly fell on deaf ears.
"Oh who are you to tell me what to do? You haven't even gotten in your Eva once without somebody helping you!" Asuka said, crossing her arms in a display of complete self-assuredness.
"But Kano," Shinji replied, almost whispering. "It's...her."
"What was that Third?"
And that was about the time I realized how pointless any of that speech was. I was dealing with two heads even thicker than mine, in their own ways, but nonetheless, it was very unlikely anything I said was getting through.
"Enough!" Misato's voice finally intervened.
Well...I can't get through to them. But what comes next probably can. Maybe.
"Kano is right. As is the Deputy Commander. What you've done today is embarrassing. Accordingly, your training regiment for the upcoming battle has been revised. You'll start tomorrow. Dismissed."
Well, that's just that then.
The next day, a sight exactly as I'd pictured it displayed itself. Namely, Shinji's room stuffed full of boxes and a certain redhead being the culprit.
"What's all this crap doing in my room?"
"Haven't you heard Third? It seems you're being replaced."
"Somehow I doubt that," I said as I grabbed a can of Pepsi from the fridge, the one indulgence I allowed myself. Because if I was going to deal with the depression-caused apocalypse, it certainly would not be without caffeine.
"Hmm. What's with these Japanese rooms anyway? Who makes doors that don't even close?" Asuka said, demonstrating on the offending article of construction. "Bunch of perverts."
"Hey, just gotta be quick with your wanks I suppose," I said nonchalantly, being met with two looks of disgust that were equally apart as they were entertaining.
I knew now why Misato did it.
"W-what?" Shinji sputtered.
"Dummkopf! Honestly, are all boys such pigs?" Asuka followed, incredulous.
"We were all thinking it," I replied, chuckling between gulps. "I'm just honest."
"It's because the Japanese value the needs of others before those of themselves," came our guardian's voice, only for an arm to pat me on the back rather roughly. "Though to be honest I find Kano's explanation a lot more valid."
We both burst off in snickering laughter, which was at least somewhat maintained by the look on my fellow pilots' faces.
"Misato!" they both cried out.
"Anyway," she said, quickly shifting into relaxed, but sharp. Business mode was on. "How are you two getting along? Enjoying each-other's company yet?"
"Pfft, hardly. Why do you ask?" the German said.
"Well, you see, that's part of the next operation."
"...What."
Another unified response. They were getting into the spirit of it already.
"The only way to defeat the next Angel is through a simultaneous two-sided attack on it's dual Cores. We'll need absolute coordination for that. So, I've had you scheduled for synchronization training. You'll be living together from now on."
"...WHAT."
There seemed to be a pattern forming, I could note.
"Misato, I can't just live under the same roof as two boys. That's disgusting!"
"Oi," I responded.
"Well that's alright, as you won't be for some time."
"What."
Now it was time for me and Shinji to be in sync.
"I'm not taking any chances with this mission. One defeat is more than enough to be considered unacceptable. So. as we have four pilots, I've decided to split them in two groups, in order to have a back up. Kano, you'll be spending the rest of the week over at Rei's place."
I would've dropped the can if there were any other liquid in it. Something told me that I'd be needing it.