I wanted to update with a chapter since I've been writing so many words for different fics. I've been bad on updating, but I do have a timeline for the rest of the fic. I decided on an end pairing for Hiroki, don't worry, it's not Nowaki.

Thanks for reading!

-Lucicelo

Chapter 18

Nowaki swallowed down his anger at having forgotten to silence his cellphone. Better yet, he should have turned off his phone and went on his business, but he didn't need a mar on his work record over being unavailable. Despite being liked in the hospital, his superiors didn't play favorites when it came to the new residents. Anytime the hospital called, he had to answer every single time. Other residents jumped at the chance to stand out and take hours from another in order to come ahead of the pack. During his stay in America, his mentor advised him in not seeming too eager.

He saw first hand performances from different medical students who kissed up to their superiors. Their brownnosing did nothing more than exclude them from the other medical residents. From his standpoint, he saw no need to do such a thing. He kept such a perfect reputation through being helpful to his fellow students and volunteered his own time to observe the medical staff in action. He perfected such a mask from his various jobs, not one of his ex-coworkers saw him in a bad light.

His actions brought on contacts and reliable friends to help him in dire straights. One of them unknowingly helped him find the investigator that connected him back to his beloved. The blessings that came through patience and keeping his true thoughts to himself.

Almost sliding across the floor when he entered his bedroom, he snatched the phone from the bedside drawer. Breathing through his nose, he got into character. The ever kind and respectful, Kusama Nowaki, new medical resident.

He pressed the answer button, put the phone against his ear. "Kusama Nowaki? Yes? Ah, my apologies, I was in the shower, sir." Nowaki informed the person on the phone with a disguised gentle tone. "Yes...I can come into work in a few hours. It's no problem at all. Thank you, goodbye."

Pressing the end button, Nowaki's fingers dug into the glass and plastic covering of his phone. It trembled in his grip making his fingers turn white from the strain. He found his patience dimming, forcing is anger to the surface in an alarming rate. This realization almost scared him. He perfected his outer mask to the public, but the constant phone calls lessened his time with Hiroki.

Shoving his phone into his pocket, he left his room and walked down the hallway. Thoughts of leaving Hiroki alone in their cabin made him nervous. Hiroki fell off of the couch and went through days of a high fever. His beloved still remained weak from lack of muscle use and recovering from his sickness.

"Hiro-san! Bad news, my love." Nowaki declared as he entered the kitchen with a masked smile. "I have to leave for work." He crouched down in front of Hiroki, regretful in leaving his beloved all alone again. "Will you be fine this afternoon?"

Hiroki kept his eyes on his uneaten breakfast. He bemoaned not having stomached the grilled fish, it smelled divine. Even a flavored rice bowl would have sufficed in satisfying his unrelenting hunger.

"Hiro-san?"

Hiroki muttered. "Fine."

Nowaki beamed at him. "I'll try to come home soon. Although, my senior resident doctor will probably call another twelve hour shift. That's been the usual shift I tend to go through. I'll have to leave you in your room-"

Hiroki snapped. "No!"

Nowaki wrinkled his nose in confusion as he got on one knee. "What do you mean no? Hiro-san, I have to leave soon. I know you'll be lonely without me, but I will be back soon."

Furious at Nowaki's stupidity, Hiroki breathed through his nose. "I'd rather sit in the living room. Laying in bed...I'm bored. Just bored."

Nowaki reached out his hands and cupped them around Hiroki's thin wrists. "But, the last time I left you in the living room..." He tightened his fingers and gritted his teeth. "I don't want to lose you."

"I'll wither away in my room." Ignoring the pain from Nowaki's grip, Hiroki insisted. "I-I need entertainment."

Nowaki peered into Hiroki's eyes and tilted his head to the side. "Entertainment? My love, you have books to read."

"Sunlight!" Hiroki added in. "I need to see what's outside. Anything! Nowaki, you can't leave me locked up all day! That's just-"

Tutting, Nowaki removed his left hand from Hiroki's wrists and caressed Hiroki's trembling face. "I might consider leaving you here, if you-" He maneuvered Hiroki's hand onto his crotch. "Do something for me later."

Hiroki wanted to vomit again. He knew this reprieve from sex wouldn't last long. If anything, Nowaki lasted longer than expected. Ever since the first time Nowaki fucked him, he noticed that Nowaki had an insatiable appetite. The man's recovery time was fast and he went for second and third rounds. Caring little for his tiredness or if he was conscious for the act. He might have dreamed the time Nowaki fucked him in his sleep. Then again, he wouldn't have put it against him.

To comfort himself, he saw the silver lining in Nowaki's demands. He didn't have to suffer through actual penetrative sex. His hole wouldn't rip again, leaving him in constant pain for weeks. A blow job was nothing in comparison.

He gulped down the acid burning his throat. "Y-Yes."

Hiroki used the rest of the day to mentally prepare himself in going through with blowing Nowaki. Back in the past, he patted himself in the back for making a man cum through using his mouth. His old flames tended to prefer blow jobs than sex because he lavished the cock properly. Thinking back, his lovers sucked at fucking him so he would rather perform a blow job than lay back and take lackluster sex. He tried teaching them, but none of them wanted to change their ways.

It was no wonder he turned picky when selecting a new prospective boyfriend.

In the end, he stopped searching for a guy and just handled his own pleasure. A nice sized dildo or decent vibrator got the job done. During the beginning of his dry spell, he thought about sleeping with Akihiko, but he turned that idea down flat. Akihiko was too important to use as a one night stand or a fuck buddy. No other man compared to his closest friend.

This free time away from Nowaki wasn't used for stretching. His initial plans of maneuvering his body around, to turn himself limber, was placed in the backburner. His mind swirled with the idea of reducing himself to being no more than a sex slave. Despite Nowaki's declarations of love, the man didn't treat him respect or dignity.

His old self would have knocked Nowaki out with a punch and ran off Now, all he had going for him was stubbornness to survive and live.

When Nowaki returned to his home, he picked him up from the living room and went straight to the bedroom. Nowaki spoke in a sweet and ecstatic tone, thrilled at the prospect of another step in their relationship. Hiroki swallowed the saliva to coat his dry throat. He wasn't ready. All the thinking of acting, to perform the best of his ability, flew out the window.

He wanted nothing more than bite off Nowaki's cock. Let the guy bleed to death on the floor while he escaped, but his strength was reduced to nothing. He had no additional plans after escaping the cabin. Without any money or change of clothes, he remained stuck until he concocted any means of a successful escape.

"You're not strong enough for your knees." Nowaki set Hiroki onto his bed and smiled. "There's always next time."

If I had my way, I would never touch you again.

Hiroki's face went stone faced as Nowaki unbuckled his belt and unzipped his pants. He managed to move onto his belly before Nowaki shoved his half hard cock near his face. The girth and length was impressive. Having avoided looking at Nowaki's cock during the non consensual sex, he felt the large cock tearing into him, but he didn't see it.

No wonder he felt ripped in half.

Nowaki just shoved his cock in and expected the little bit of lube to help him thrust in.

"Go on." Nowaki breathed out, jutting his hips to move his cock closer to Hiroki's mouth. "You promised me."

Looking up, Hiroki flinched at the lustful leering. All of Nowaki's true emotions showed in his eyes. Those once gentle baby blues, morphed into ice and fire. At any moment, Nowaki might just force his head forward and hurry him up. He eyed Nowaki's twitching hands and gulped down his anxiety.

Licking his lips, Hiroki began servicing Nowaki. Closing his eyes, he detached himself and went through the usual motions. One hand pumped the cock in his mouth while his other hand played with the balls. He used his tongue to lick around the head, thankfully clean, he mouthed the bulb, bringing out a groan from the man attached to the cock.

Years passed since he blew his last man. A simple acquaintances with benefits type. One who left his apartment after a quick fuck and only called him for sex. The guy ended up marrying a woman from his office and broke off their agreement. Sometime later, he caught the man being fucked in a gay club. Hiroki felt bad for the wife for having a husband who lied about his orientation.

Laying down on his belly helped Hiroki keep himself steady. His neck hurt from the angle, but he used his position to hurry the man into orgasm. Had he started this on his knees, he would have gotten tired real quick.

Fingers curled into his hair, Hiroki paused for a flicker of a moment. The loving gesture did nothing more than distract him. Removing his mouth from the dick, he licked underneath the length and kissed along the sides. He returned in bobbing his head, taking half of the cock into his mouth and using his hand to apply pressure on the base.

The blow job didn't last long.

"A-Ah! Hiro-san."

Hiroki's eyes snapped open, illusion broken as Nowaki pushed his head forward. This action prevented him from escaping the oncoming load. His mouth became coated with semen, filling his mouth to the point where he had to swallow. The post orgasm bliss made Nowaki loosen his grip on Hiroki's head, giving him a chance to remove his mouth from his cock. Coughing onto the floor, tears prickled the corners of his eyes.

The shame and disgust coated Hiroki's whole being.

Ever since the blow job, Nowaki became his old loving and sentimental self. Hiroki didn't believe none of the sweet words Nowaki declared or his tender kisses. He kept on stiffening in place, an obvious sign of his discomfort. Nowaki kept touching him without permission. He gritted his teeth when Nowaki tried deepening their kisses. Nowaki had to touch his package to get him to loosen his jaw.

These tricks pushed Nowaki into getting what he wanted. Instead of forcefulness, the transition into coerced heavy petting was a blessing. Hiroki preferred the gentleness than the roughness that Nowaki displayed during his depressed or furious moments.

Whenever Nowaki left for work or the store, he expected a good-bye kiss. When he returned from the outside world, he kissed him again. Hiroki couldn't claim tiredness to escape the couplely gesture. He tried to not kiss Nowaki one other time, and the man's face morphed into the face of his nightmares. So, he ended up taking the onslaught of love and affection.

The first nightmare of dream Nowaki appeared that night.

Nowaki tried soothing him with kisses, but Hiroki transitioned into a full blown panic attack. He smacked Nowaki across the face and screamed out loud. His legs snapped together and his body thrashed in fear. Nowaki left the room for a glass of water before Hiroki lulled himself to sleep. He curled into a ball and woke up to scratches on his own arms.

For a whole week, Nowaki didn't venture into his room.

To make up for the nightmare, Nowaki began leaving him in the living room without him having to tell him. He was surrounded with pillows, the coffee table filled with yogurt. Nowaki left the tv on as well. A means to keep the cabin from the lingering silence. The little things that Hiroki voiced approval, making the naïve fool beam with happiness. Nowaki even promised to bring him beer.

Sweet, sweet beer.

Nowaki left on a high note, Hiroki breathed a sigh of relief.

He had not gotten drunk in months. Maybe, Nowaki lessened the medicine in his saline bag, making it possible for him to get drunk. A positive in this whole situation. He didn't care if he vomited on the floor, Nowaki would clean it up.

Hiroki stared down at the yogurt that was placed across from him on the coffee table. There was even a bowl of cut up fruit beside it to give additional nutrition if he wished. Moving his right arm across his chest, he winced at the I.V digging underneath his skin. Nowaki placed it back into his arm when he washed him and spoon-fed him nutritional packed porridge at dinner.

This little snack was unnecessary and made his stomach churn. He ate porridge for dinner. Also, the consistency reminded him of Nowaki's cum coating his throat. He hacked into his closed fist.

Ignoring the bowl, Hiroki turned his attention onto his legs. He moved his legs up and down to loosen his muscles. He didn't dare attempt to walk on his own. His arms trembled whenever he tried using the arm rests to rise himself off his seat. Also, the I.V might slip out of his arm and he feared putting it back into his skin.

He settled on trying to get onto his feet when Nowaki left for a twelve hour shifts. Nowaki took an hour to leave and come back, turning a twelve hour shift to fourteen hours. This timeline gave him a reference to use for when Nowaki began his journey back home. He just had to figure out how long the shift was before he started his retraining.

Nowaki announced his presence with a loud slam of the front door.

Hiroki turned his attention onto the threshold of the door. Nowaki reacted positively when he acknowledged his presence when he walked into a room. The smile on Nowaki's face made Hiroki relax against the couch. Nowaki opened up his beer and handed it to him. Before Nowaki tried any tricks, Hiroki downed half of the beer, his vision blurred from the onslaught of alcohol.

Damn, his tolerance turned into shit.

Next to him, Nowaki kept on smiling as he nursed his own beer, pissing Hiroki off. Hiroki finished his beer and demanded another one. Nowaki complied. He finished three more beers before his head swayed from side to side. He used to be able to handle more than four beers before he became tipsy.

Through half lidded eyes, he watched Nowaki's hand slip inside of his sweat pants, caressing his cock into full mast. He didn't have the voice to say anything when Nowaki slipped his cock into his mouth. Bobbing his head in an off beat rhythm to bring him pleasure. He let out a few grunts before he fell into unconsciousness.

Soshi rubbed his face, trying hard not to show his distress at Fuyumi's admittance to the hospital. Despite her claims of having taken her medicine and usual relaxation tactics, she collapsed during her small shopping trip. The big strain of stress on account of their missing son weighed heavily onto her shoulders. She was always a worrying type. Even more so for their only child.

Not that he didn't worry about Hiroki, he stayed up during various nights, drinking sake to dull away the dark thoughts. His work production doubled in order to stop himself from thinking of the worst. Hiroki's stubbornness, a trait he inherited from him, gave him some relief. Hiroki would put up a fight until his demise.

To have his dearest wife's health deteriorate over their missing son, prompted him to face her with his concerns. He didn't know where to begin the conversation.

Fuyumi broke the silence with a simple statement. "I'm fine."

"You're not alright!" Soshi snapped. "Fuyumi, don't lie to me. You're deteriorating before my eyes. This is the third time you've landed in the hospital!"

Fuyumi looked down at her hands, hands that clutched onto the sheets Soshi brought from home. "I want him back."

Soshi reached out his hand and rubbed her knuckles. "Dearest...it's been months. The chance of finding Hiroki is-"

Fuyumi sniffled. "I'm not giving up on my son." Her lip trembled as she tried keeping the tears at bay. "I can't sleep at night. My mind is constantly thinking of what the kidnapper is doing to him. It's...soul crushing to think that Hiroki is suffering. He might be hurting right now and I'm useless. We're useless to help him!"

"We have to rely on the investigators and Usami to find him." Soshi attempted to soothe her, but didn't believe the words himself. From the glare he received from Fuyumi, she caught him in his lie. "All we can do is wait for any phone calls."

Soshi hid the officers disappointing comments from his wife. He didn't need her to collapse from the lack of good news. The department lessened their searches and focused their attention onto another missing person. A newer face whose chances of being found seemed plausible from the immense amount of evidence. He didn't blame them. Months passed since Hiroki went missing, the police found no leads and all they figured out was the precise night of Hiroki's disappearance.

Usami's birthday party.

From Usami's search updates, he found no trail to go on, but kept on persevering through the countryside. Usami didn't believe the person kept Hiroki in Tokyo. It made no remote sense. Hiroki would have fought the man and made a scandal to gain attention. The police somewhat looked into the outside cities, but dropped the idea.

Without any true evidence or reason, the police couldn't waste their money and resources over a dead end.

Fuyumi snapped. "Don't lie. They stopped calling us. They all think Hiroki ran off and cut ties with all of us."

"You're right." Soshi kept a hand on her and looked into her eyes. "I didn't want to aggravate your heart and that was stupid of me. But, Fuyumi, you have to think of your health. How would Hiroki feel when he returns and you are in the hospital? I'm not telling you to bury your emotions, I miss Hiroki just as much as you do. Please, you have to find new ways of coping."

Fuyumi hunched her shoulders. "I'm sorry, dearest." Tears trickled down her face as Soshi wrapped his arms around him in a tight embrace. "I want to go home. I need our lives to go back to normal."

"The nurse informed me that you would be discharged tonight." He pressed a kiss on her temple. "All we can do is hope."

Hiroki's plan of attack sickened him.

Revising different plans in his mind, many of them required him to develop his full strength back. Porridge and fruit provided enough energy for the day, not enough to overpower a healthy and strong man. Others needed Nowaki to leave sharp utensils for him to hide underneath his bed until ample opportunity opened for him to use it. Considering his transition into heavier foods failed, that was impossible. All these plans had holes which worked against him.

One obvious plan kept nagging him on: faking an attraction to Kusama Nowaki.

The implications caused his body to shiver in revulsion. This reprieve from sex, due to his wounds, made nights bearable for the most part. Although, he woke up in cold sweats, scared of having his legs forced open once he recovered and plunged into without mercy. Nowaki checked him every night, pouting about his slow recovery process. Hiroki thanked whatever entity caused this sudden wave of empathy in Nowaki to not shove his dick up his ass.

Maybe, Nowaki's past feelings crawled out, causing this long period of abstinence. No, the injuries Nowaki inflicted on him brought on some sympathy. Whether it came from the regret in hurting him or not being able to fuck him, he didn't know. Although, the discovery of blowjobs served him well. A blowjob or a hand job distracted Nowaki from inspecting his body during his bath time.

Taking advantage of this good mood, the post coital high made Nowaki amendable to Hiroki's comfort. One or two blowjobs later, Nowaki relented in striving for his recovery. Hiroki collapsed at the end of the blowjobs, using tiredness as an excuse to keep Nowaki from continuing. The excuse came out naturally after finishing a blowjob. Those were tiring and time consuming.

Hiroki started his seduction in small intervals. He initiated a predictable kiss in the beginning of the week and went for little forms of affection. Any lingering touches brought him nausea and disgust.

The moron saw no difference.

TBC