Chapter 22
Kamijou Hiroki was the star of Nowaki's constant daydreams.
As he went through his never-ending number of shifts, he recalled Hiroki's voice. To him, Hiroki sounded intelligent and self-assured while he taught his lessons. Nowaki couldn't help but stare at his tutor as he explained different aspects of the beginning years of high school. Talk of boring history was amplified through Hiroki's commentary. As he learned deeper insight on his subjects, Hiroki's good looks entranced him to risk discreet glances at his handsome face.
Whenever Nowaki kept up with Hiroki's teachings, answering correctly or gaining one hundred percent, he received a pat on the shoulder and a relieved smile. Nowaki's heart seemed to jump out of his chest. A simple touch broke Nowaki into a simpering mess.
According to Hiroki, his old students from high school didn't behave a fraction of a percentage as Nowaki did. Nowaki didn't hesitate in listening to Hiroki and writing down extra notations in his notebooks. There were no complaints on Nowaki's end, the more time he spent in Hiroki's presence, the better.
Hiroki's compliments boosted Nowaki's morale to further keep Hiroki's positive thoughts of him.
Anything to bring a smile to Hiroki's face.
Nowaki didn't wrinkle his nose whenever Hiroki added another booklet onto his workload. He noticed the little notes Hiroki wrote in the corners, giving him ample advice to use for him to learn the material. Hiroki went beyond for him to understand the material and to successfully pass his high school exams.
He would forever be grateful to his bosses for pushing him in front of Kamijou Hiroki.
Those men exposed him to his new reason for living.
Without fail, Hiroki became the main focus on Nowaki's dreams as well. Almost every single night, Nowaki dreamed of Hiroki's smiling face and his voice. Those innocent dreams transitioned into sex dreams. These spicier dreams caused him to wake up with damp boxers and a face palm to cover his embarrassed face.
When he was a preteen, the older boys teased him about waking up to wet sheets and stiff cocks. Using lewd words to describe the wreckage of puberty and the bodies of the surrounding maturing girls. Nowaki ignored the older boys, embarrassed and mortified at the manner they spoke about the girls they would like to get to know better. He learned about his body from schoolteachers and caretakers. Their technical approach taught him better than his crude roommates lessons.
Either from embarrassment or strong will, Nowaki never woke up from a wet dream at the orphanage. There were instances where he felt the hormones, but not enough to warrant discreetly washing his clothes in the early morning. Then again, no one caught his interest the way Hiroki did. Hiroki roused the inner fire Nowaki thought wasn't possible to encourage.
And Nowaki's fantasies soon encompassed a percentage of his thoughts.
Good thing he learned to calm himself before his cock gave him away. Most of his work uniforms were loose fitting and would have exposed him right away.
For the longest time, he thought of himself as asexual or simply found no one interesting enough to develop feelings for. His view of most people was low to begin with, seeing them as nothing more as means to an end. None of them spurned him into a testosterone induced frenzy.
Kamijou Hiroki woke up the monster inside of his chest.
Announcing his lessening hours brought questions from all his bosses, many of whom were used to calling him whenever someone else called off. He was a reliable employee who never said no. This was his position in all of his jobs. This reliability helped in overtime pay, but not in this new venture in his life. He needed ample time for him to focus on his studies.
Nowaki explained his new tutoring regimen, courtesy of Kamijou Hiroki, and his bosses were brimming with pride at his decision.
All these men saw him striving for better pastures. For Nowaki to not have to work multiple jobs to make ends meet and to replenish his ever-growing savings account. An account he never touched or referenced whenever someone asked him about how he made ends meet.
Exposing his nest of money was putting a target on his back.
Nowaki couldn't help the goofy smile on his face when he informed another different boss. "Ah, yes. Kamijou-sensei agreed to teach me."
His boss slapped Nowaki's back, grinning from ear to ear. "See? This is a good chance for you, Wa-chan. You can finish school and help all those kids."
Nowaki rubbed the back of his neck, playing the part of a sheepish man. "I need to pass Kamijou-sensei's strict teachings. He is relentless in making sure I learn every piece of detail he can find in the high school curriculum."
"Ah, then we were correct to see the immense importance that Kamijou-san had to offer."
Nowaki bit the inside of his cheek. His smile strained a bit, but not enough to expose the feeling of annoyance inside of his mind. He knew these men helped push Hiroki in his path, but they didn't need to boast about it.
Nowaki was the one going through the study sessions. He made sure to use his tutor's time wisely before leaving to go home. His mind and body were present to receive the help from Hiroki.
Nowaki added in. "I know this is short notice, but I will have to cut back on the overtime I usually do. Hiroki-sensei wanted me to do some Saturday afternoon sessions. He has lectures in the early morning."
"Of course! Education is very important! There is no need to worry, I will make a note of this in the computer system. I'm sure there is another employee willing to take on extra hours."
"Thank you." Nowaki bowed his head as his boss rushed off to his office.
Inside of his pocket, Nowaki's phone buzzed, signifying Hiroki's message. Yanking the phone out of his pocket, Nowaki skimmed through the message, happy to respond to Hiroki on his new free Saturday afternoons. Hiroki answered with a simple, Good. I will see you then.
Reaching out his hand, Nowaki kept an ear out for Hiroki's footsteps as the man tinkered in the kitchen. Permeating aromas filled the tiny apartment as food sizzled in a pan. Hiroki voiced wanting to make a quick noodle dish instead of ordering out. Commenting on wanting to try out one of his mother's old dishes for nostalgia's sake.
Nowaki couldn't wait to taste it.
It was almost as if he would taste a bit of his future mother-in-law's cooking. From the smells of the apartment, Hiroki learned well from his mother. Hiroki claimed to have helped his mother during his down time in between his hobbies. The image of a younger Hiroki helping his mother in the kitchen never failed to make Nowaki smile.
If only Hiroki set time apart in their tutoring sessions for cooking alone. Nowaki would eat every single bite and still give him one hundred percent work.
There was a small window frame for Nowaki to sneak away another one of Hiroki's possessions. The barrier between the kitchen and the living room slash bedroom wasn't enough for Nowaki to do much. He had the chance to shift through Hiroki's stuff when Hiroki went to have a quick shower. Most of the time, Hiroki showered before Nowaki arrived. Nowaki's chance to snoop for better items was gone due to Hiroki's forethought.
Nowaki's fingers skimmed over the bitten pens and drunk coffee cans. These items were once in Hiroki's mouth. Touching his lips and his tongue, Nowaki wanted to press the can's mouth against his own and chew the pens. Anything to pretend to have felt Hiroki's lips against his own. The mere thought of Hiroki kissing him made a shiver go up his spine.
He was growing impatient in waiting for the right time to confess. Being in Hiroki's presence brought on thoughts to tell him that he wanted him. To surpass the tutor and student relationship and enter into a romantic one. They spent more than enough time together that he was certain Hiroki saw him as more than a student.
Hiroki's comment to his best friend should have been false. It had to be. He was not just a student. Hiroki confided in him about personal events of his life and spoke about his plans for the future. Students were not privy to the private life of their teachers.
He was more than a student.
He was Hiroki's future-
Wrapping his hands around the pen, Hiroki exclaimed. "Nowaki!" Nowaki's hand snapped, causing the pens to fall against the side of the low-rise table. The pens scattered throughout the area, creating a mess of his stealth.
Bowing low, Nowaki retrieved all of the pens before Hiroki peeked from the kitchen to ask about the noise. Then again, the noise of cooking and city noise would be enough for Hiroki not to wonder what Nowaki was doing in his living room slash bedroom.
"Y-Yeah?!"
Hiroki asked. "Did you want extra sauce? Mom usually adds extra, but I know some people don't like their noodles to be extra saucy."
Nowaki immediately answered. "Extra is fine!"
"Got it."
Nowaki shuffled the pen in his hand inside of his backpack. He inspected Hiroki's side of the table and was relieved to see nothing else was disturbed. Hiroki's schoolwork and tutoring materials always overlapped, making for an organized mess that somehow Hiroki managed to navigate through.
Hiroki wouldn't notice missing pen or miscellaneous clothes.
Hiroki soon made his appearance with two plates full of fragrant noodles. He set them down before leaving again to retrieve water bottles and canned iced tea. Slumping onto the floor, Hiroki clasped his hands together and thanked out loud for the meal. Nowaki followed suit.
Nowaki waited until Hiroki ate a bite of food before he ate. Tears gathered in the corners of his eyes as he savored the food. He could feel the love in every bite. His tongue tingled from the flavors of the noodle dish.
"Good?" Hiroki inquired.
"Yeah." Nowaki ate another bite.
"Good." Hiroki said. "Mom would have given me the disappointed mom look if I failed to cook basic meals."
Nowaki helped himself to more of his food and sipped water in between bites. At some point during the meal, Hiroki retrieved another bottle of water and placed it beside his plate. Nowaki thanked him with a big smile on his face.
He thought Hiroki would make for a good house husband.
Nowaki feared Hiroki's reaction to his change of major.
"Looks like you're all set for your exams. You know everything in these packets, and you made no more mistakes. I'm impressed." Hiroki shut down his laptop and inspected Nowaki's work. "You don't really need me to show you what to do anymore."
Nowaki shook his head and insisted. "I will always need you. This motivation I have come out of fruition because of you. You encouraged me to go through my exams and not to procrastinate from my studies. All this work happened through your help."
Hiroki shrugged his shoulders. "You're the one who retained the information and passed these mock tests. I just showed you how to harness your potential. You have a bright mind Nowaki and you can accomplish so much."
Nowaki gulped. "I need to apologize before I have to say this to you."
Hiroki chugged down his water. "It must be serious...out with it."
"I don't want to be in social work."
"What?"
"I want to be a doctor."
Hiroki almost knocked his water from the table, but he caught it on time. "You have got to be kidding me." He crumpled a piece of paper in his hands. "You're switching majors?"
Nowaki nodded his head. "I- I thought about this throughout the weekend and I want to go into medicine. I see myself as a doctor. Social work isn't my passion anymore."
Hiroki slammed his hand onto the table, Nowaki tried not to flinch. "How dare you switch on me now?! Do you have any idea how many hours I spent going through those archives to get you the material for social work? Why didn't you tell me months ago? We would have focused on sciences and the subjects needed for medicine. You're this close to your exams!"
Nowaki insisted. "I'll complete my usual material and then transfer into medical school."
"Medical school is hard. Way harder than any profession out there. Are you even sure you can even complete the program?" Hiroki asked.
"I will complete the programs."
"Yeah right." Hiroki snorted. "I'm not saying you are not capable. Far from it, your memory is impeccable but you're working to the bone to even make it into community college next semester."
"You're mad at me."
Hiroki sighed. "I can't be mad. At least you figured this out before you went through the classes for social work. All I can do is wish you the best of luck. Law school is hard but medical school is brutal."
Nowaki walked around the table and crouched in front of Hiroki. "Are you sure? You're not annoyed that I wasted your time."
"I'm not irritated." Hiroki arched his brow.
Leaning closer, Nowaki connected their lips. Plunging his tongue in between Hiroki's gaping mouth, he almost slobbered through the kiss. His lack of practice showed but this didn't slow down his enthusiasm. He relished locking lips with Hiroki while conscious. He dreamed of his moment throughout the weeks of tutoring. Wanting nothing more than to hold Hiroki in his arms and show off the love he held for him.
He pushed him onto the ground and rubbed their hips together. Bringing him to sigh and whimper into the kiss. Hiroki moved underneath him, he misinterpreted it as Hiroki enjoying this as well. His hands touched any inch of Hiroki's body. He paid close attention to any revealed naked skin when Hiroki's shirt rose up his chest. He broke the kiss to focus on Hiroki's smooth neck.
Hiroki broke from his stupor. He smacked Nowaki's cheek and pushed him off of him with his feet. Sitting up, he shuffled away from Nowaki until his back hit the wall. "What the fuck was that?!" He wiped his mouth with his sleeve, his eyes widened in shock.
Nowaki ignored the stinging of his cheek. No use hiding his emotions anymore. "Hiro-san, I love you." Nowaki touched his lips as he confessed in longing. "I-I love you." Gulping, he got on his knees and gripped the front of his shirt. "I don't want to stop seeing you. This can't be the end."
Biting his bottom lip, Hiroki stood up on his feet. "I hold no such feelings for you." Hiroki stated. "I'm sorry but I cannot return your feelings. This is just a student and teacher relationship."
Hiroki rejected him.
Nowaki found himself in a daze as he rushed his way back home. One hand gripped his backpack as the other held the heart shaped locket in his pocket. Somehow, he held himself together as he made his way through the city. He didn't need to cause a spectacle through crying in public or showing his distress. It was no one's business that the person he loved rejected him. The idea of someone he knew finding him crying was mortifying to behold.
In a way, it was good that he left his bike at his apartment. Nowaki was certain he would find himself getting into an accident due to his broken heart. Through walking, he could follow crowds or let his body go through the motions of getting home. He somewhat managed to look collected, but his hands trembled, and his legs felt weak.
There were instances where tears pricked his eyes, but he discreetly rubbed them away. Stubborn in keeping himself together before he broke down. He pushed himself through the city, counting the minutes before he made it home. As he grew closer to his apartment, Nowaki started a jog. He dodged and weaved through the crowd without having bumped into anyone. His thoughts circled on making it home. To make it home to feel safe enough to release the anguish inside of his heart.
Turning onto his street, he bolted forward.
Maneuvering through the incoming people, Nowaki bit the inside of his cheek as he saw a couple lost in their own world. The tall young man guided his shorter girlfriend through the street. His arms wrapped around her waist as they went on their leisure stroll.
Nowaki wanted this for himself and Hiroki.
Tears returned into his eyes. Nowaki tried to keep them at bay, but one managed to escape his eyes. Petrified, Nowaki hunched his head and ran into his apartment complex. He took two steps up the staircase and got onto his right floor. He stopped in front of his door and fished out his keys. His hands trembled as he shoved the key inside the lock and unlocked the door.
Nowaki stalked into his apartment, threw his backpack onto the floor, and began throwing whatever item caught his eye. It mattered little if he saved months of income for the camera or found his dishes at discount. His grief and heartbreak blinded him to whatever he touched. He wanted to release the distress he held back inside of his heart the moment he stepped out of Hiroki's apartment.
Ignoring the knocks on the door from concerned neighbors, Nowaki kicked down chairs and slammed his fist against the wall. Tears blurred his vision as he continued on his rampage.
He opened kitchen cabinets and yanked out dishes. His rapid heartbeat deafened him to the breaking dishes and glasses. Somehow, he managed to dodge the broken glass as he opened more cabinets and tossed the contents onto the floor.
He returned to the living room to kick the couch but stopped once his toe hit the harder parts of the couch. The sudden ping of pain broke Nowaki out of his state of mind. Forcing himself to take deep breaths, he hugged himself with his arms and rocked back and forth.
Once his emotions settled down, Nowaki took in the state of his apartment and rubbed his face raw. His fingers felt the wetness of his tears and hot skin.
His living room and kitchen were ruined.
Letting out a broken groan, he stepped backward until he hit the wall and stared up at the ceiling.
"Why did I? Why did I do that?" Nowaki asked out loud. "I-I love him for sure but…I…"
Sliding down the wall, Nowaki curled over his knees and croaked out a sob. Tightening his grip around his legs, Nowaki let himself cry.
Hiroki Kamijou managed to make him cry for the first time in years.
Nowaki watched from his kitchen table as his cell phone blew up with Hiroki's phone calls.
His phone was unscathed in between the disaster of his living room and kitchen. During his sporadic release of emotions, he tossed it on his couch, saving him from a hefty cost. Even though he paid for an insurance plan, Nowaki didn't like the inconvenience of having to go in person to replace it.
Throughout the first night of heartbreak, Nowaki called off of work, citing a sudden illness. A lifetime worth of burnout was bound to happen to him. Nowaki worked and studied at the same time.
His bosses didn't question him and wished him a speedy recovery. Nowaki was thankful for his ability to control his voice. He didn't need anyone to see him at his lowest point. He still had his pride.
On autopilot, Nowaki bought three different bento meals for a whole day. He was unwilling to cook himself a meal or even clean the mess he left on the floor. He forced himself to shower and change clothes. Anything to appear normal to his neighbors who questioned him on what happened in his apartment. When his neighbors knocked on his door, he managed to explain his outburst as a reaction to a family member's death. A close family member that didn't exist, but this lie served his purposes.
None of his neighbors knew of his orphan status.
Many of the housewives brought him well-meaning bentos, supplementing Nowaki for a few more days in his solitude. This helped Nowaki not to spend money as he forced himself to eat them and clean them up for when he inevitably returned them to their owners.
The least he could do was wash them.
As his phone continued to ring, he imagined the indignation on Hiroki's face when he realized that Nowaki didn't return to their tutoring sessions. Nowaki had not returned for two tutoring sessions. No phone call. No messages. Nothing.
This wasn't like him.
He knew this wasn't something he would do.
Nowaki faced every obstacle in his life and navigated through without issues. He learned not to let his emotions get the better of him. No one in the world would coddle him or protect him from the problems of the world. It was up to him to deal with his own problems.
Maybe, it was due time for him to break down emotionally. He kept everything he resented locked inside of his heart, wanting nothing more than to live. But, closing himself off was not living. He was keeping himself alive long enough to experience the smallest bit of happiness in his life.
Hiroki tore open the possibility for everlasting love. He caused a reaction that Nowaki craved to keep to himself. An aspect of life Nowaki never bothered to fantasize about.
Yet, Hiroki didn't feel the same spark for him.
Nowaki couldn't fake a smile through the last study sessions. The connection Nowaki grasped on to pull himself through his studies to keep up with Hiroki's demanding workload was not reciprocated.
He thought it best not to torture himself through facing Hiroki. This was the coward's way out, but Nowaki didn't want to suffer further shame in trying to speak to Hiroki. The added humiliation kept him away from the phone. Stopping him from the temptation to defend his rash decision. Not that he needed the extra tutoring. Hiroki taught him far too well.
Nowaki promised not to abandon his studies for anything. The added discipline from Hiroki helped Nowaki to focus on his studies to pass his mock tests. Nowaki knew he could do it. He had the money, the knowledge, and ability to finish his schooling to become a doctor.
Despite everything that happened between them, Nowaki wanted to continue to spend time with the man he loved. With his impulsive confession, he didn't have the opportunity to be in Hiroki's presence. He ruined everything by opening his mouth and wanting to beat Akihiko Usami. A man Nowaki was certain was waiting for his own chance to confess to Hiroki.
Releasing a deep breath, Nowaki hid his face inside of his crossed arms.
He didn't dare listen to the voicemails. Recalling Hiroki's manner of speaking when he was angry, he knew Hiroki would hurt him deeply. Hiroki didn't wait to release the words that bubbled inside of his chest. Ready to shoot people straight through the heart with precision.
For the first time in years, Nowaki felt hopeless and alone.
Nowaki left the clothing store with newfound determination.
He met his future mother-in-law, finding her just as lovely as her son. Her kind smile caused Nowaki's chest to tighten in longing. The miniscule moments where Nowaki desired a mother was possible through Hiroki's mother. He wanted to have this woman coddle him and compliment the compatibility between him and her son.
Nowaki suspected that Fuyumi knew nothing of him. It was obvious from her lack of reaction to his name. Hiroki didn't release intimate details but gave snippets and comments. He preferred a private approach to his private life away from his family. After all, Hiroki couldn't reveal everything he did while in university to his parents.
The drinking, the disaster of his apartment, and the sexual exploits.
Nowaki couldn't forget the condom box he found in Hiroki's dresser drawer. From the sound of the wrappers hitting the sides of the box, there were some missing. Hiroki had used them. The physical indication that Hiroki was having sex with other men. Men who were not himself.
Nowaki shoved the memory in the recesses of his mind.
Best not to incite fury when Hiroki would be his. It was only a matter of time. No one else would have him. Once he won Hiroki, no other man would have him again.
Nowaki had a chance to make Hiroki his lover. His plans of becoming a doctor and leaving good impressions on Hiroki's parents was in progress. He left a good impression on Hiroki's beloved mother. Sometime in the future, he might interact with Hiroki's father, further burrowing himself into their consciousness.
There was time in the future for Fuyumi Kamijou and her husband to get to know him better. He might bump into them on a different occasion. He already knew what his future mother-in-law looked like.
He couldn't wait until they addressed him as son-in-law.
With the start of his program on the horizon, Nowaki got himself out of his lease and handed the lead of the program his application.
For the first time in weeks, the countless burdens on Nowaki's shoulders lessened. Just a bit. Enough for Nowaki to be able to smile far with genuine intent at the public. The crushing realization of heartbreak
Afterwards, he quit every single job with promises of returning in the near future. A bit of a fib for some of them, but others were jobs Nowaki could return to while attending residency. After all, the hours of those jobs were flexible enough for his future hectic residency schedule.
There was time for him to place aside to think of how to shape his future. For the moment, he focused on tying every loose end before he dove into the program in the United States. Every person he could think of, excluding Hiroki, was given a courtesy goodbye from him.
No use losing connections while he was away.
Once he finished his goodbyes, Nowaki returned to his apartment. He cleaned every single room. Top to bottom. His height helped to reach the top spots in order to keep everything spotless. At the end of the day, the place smelled of lemons and cleanliness.
Afterwards, he packed everything he needed for his trip into two large suitcases. Then the rest of his meager possessions, that survived the destruction of his apartment, were packed in boxes for a storage facility. He managed to get a decent discount due to his friend being a family friend of the owner.
With the help of a moving company, those boxes were sent to the storage facility.
During his leave inspection, his landlord was impressed at the cleanup. Promising Nowaki a good recommendation for his future leases. Nowaki was one of his better tenants who caused no trouble.
More great news to push up Nowaki's mood for his trip.
Days later, Nowaki left Japan with Hiroki's locket tied around his neck.
Nowaki finished his program in one year.
He wasted time socializing with other students, dove into his assignments, and endeared himself to his professors. Slowly, but surely, Nowaki became a favorite in the university program. He painted himself well as a studious young man who was a valuable asset to the medical field.
At the end of his stay in America, Nowaki's networking garnered him more than enough friends to open doors for him back in Japan.
Before he stepped foot on Japanese soil, Nowaki attained a residency spot in a hospital.
His seniors were happy for Nowaki's success in the program. All of them studied hard to pass this program and enter into the medical field.
There were some hard feelings over the swiftness of Nowaki's completion of the program, but they were ignored.
Nowaki's mind was on hurrying back to Japan.
He was eager to show off the result of all his hard work to Hiroki. Hiroki couldn't have possibly stayed angry at him for this long. Nowaki had not broken his promise in completing his education and was now Doctor Nowaki Kusama. This new title and prestige would impress Hiroki and soothe over his previous anger.
Besides, he remembered Hiroki's address. Well, he remembered the way there from all the times he used to go there to study. Hiroki was set on sticking around that place due to the distance to his assistant professor job at his university.
There was no way he moved away.
"Ah, Kamijou-san moved away months ago." The elderly neighbor informed Nowaki with a sympathetic smile. "
Nowaki controlled his urge to slam his closed fist against the wall. Hiroki never voiced wanting to move out of his apartment. He appeared content with his living space and the distance to his university.
Nowaki forced a smile on his face as he hunched his shoulders. "That's too bad. I lost his number when I left to study overseas. I thought he would still live here. Did he leave any forwarding address for stray mail?"
The old woman shook her head. "As far as I know, he left nothing for anyone to send him anything. I'm so sorry. I wish I could help you."
Nowaki placated her. "It is no problem at all. I will try a different friend and see if he has Hiroki-san's new phone number. Thank you for your help."
The woman and Nowaki bowed before she left for her apartment. The moment her door closed shut, Nowaki's smile melted off his face, leaving a harsh grimace.
Nowaki rubbed his face and let out a groan. This put a damper in his plans. Of course, he didn't expect Hiroki to receive him, but for him to move out was devastating to him. He couldn't trail behind Hiroki if he didn't know where he lived.
Thinking for a bit, Nowaki remembered his list of friends from his phone. One in particular stood out to him. An old orphan mate of his, Kimiko, might know someone who could help him. This woman embedded herself in all of their lives so as to not cut ties with anyone from the orphanage. As a housewife, she had plenty of free time to talk with old friends and keep track of everyone.
Nowaki escaped her usual phone calls through having gone abroad. The costs alone deterred Kimiko from communicating with him throughout his stay in America.
The program was a blessing in disguise.
Good thing he kept paying the phone while he was in America. It would have been a hassle to get service back onto his phone. He would have had to haul his suitcases along with him to the mobile store, activate his phone, then settle somewhere to start his phone calls.
The trouble was of little consequence because this was about Hiroki. He was his first priority.
Well, first priority after attending his residency hours.
Taking out his phone, Nowaki found Kimiko's name and dialed her number. Once they connected and she answered, he began walking down the stairs and left the apartment complex. Her happy-go-lucky voice grated Nowaki's jetlagged mind, but he entertained her as he walked without meaning.
"...I think I have someone who can help! Ken-kun became a police officer who retired into being a private investigator. He could help find your old tutor."
Nowaki interjected before she continued on. "Oh really? Do you have the number to his office? I could go visit him or call him sometime this week. We can catch up over a meal."
"I have his personal number, Wa-chan-"
"That's alright." Nowaki cut her off gently so as to not offend her. "I don't want Ken-san to assume that I sought him out for a job. That would be tasteless of me to do. We do have to catch up a bit. It has been years since I have seen him."
"I don't think that he will mind! He helped a lot of fellow orphans find family members so he wouldn't be bothered if you asked."
Nowaki didn't correct her assumption. This made sense considering Nowaki didn't know an inkling of his family history. Best not to give his reasoning away so freely. The woman gossiped without caring if she crossed boundaries.
Nowaki found out unsavory things about people through Kimiko slipping in mid conversation. She spoke without reason or thought before she spoke.
He opened the note app on his phone and began annotating the number Kimiko told him.
Entertaining her for another ten minutes, Nowaki held back the sight of relief when Kimiko announced that she needed to pick up ingredients for dinner. Googling the phone number, Nowaki found the address of Tennouji Ken and began his own stake out.
After conducting his stake out, Nowaki noticed that Ken frequented a local coffee chain for his caffeine fix. The place was close enough to Ken's office that he made numerous trips for coffee and pastries. More than enough to make the man a noticeable customer to the employees inside of the case.
Looking through his schedule, Nowaki received a stroke of luck. He had a free day from his residency program. An almost uncommon occurrence due to the chaos of the program. This was his chance to bump into Tennouji and weave himself into his life. Then, he would slip away once he got what he wanted out of him.
Hiroki's new address.
Maybe, he might keep his services in case Hiroki escaped him again. Hiroki moved away and left no forwarding address. Best to have a backup in case he was careless enough to lose Hiroki.
He could always call Tennouji's office, but Nowaki thought to bump into him instead.
Nowaki didn't have to fake bumping into him to gain his attention. His eyes and face were memorable enough for Ken to speak to him first. Nowaki was one of the few orphans who had colored eyes. Well, one of the handful of mixed kids among the group.
When he acted out his plan, Tennouji saw him the moment he walked inside of the cafe. Tennouji went up to greet him, bowed and shook hands, Nowaki hid his grimace of having to shake hands. One thing about their bowing culture made it less likely for someone to want to touch hands. After all, the concept of shaking hands was more of a Western greeting. Nowaki disliked the idea of touching others after seeing the disgusting lack of cleanliness other people kept. This transcended into his adult life where he assumed most people lacked proper grooming.
Having found a table to continue their conversation, Nowaki spoke about having gotten into residency. Spinning a story of changing from social work to medicine in order to expand his reach in helping people. He decided on pediatrics but shadowed different doctors to learn various specialties in medicine.
Leaving out Hiroki's influence, Nowaki described years of saving money and studying to manage to breach into university. Tennouji listened in rapture. Impressed at hearing Nowaki talk about how he managed to get into this new level in life.
Tennouji congratulated him with a slap to the back. Congratulating Nowaki with an earnest grin as he nudgedhis side, asking about a possible girlfriend in his life.
Nowaki grit his jaw to hide his displeasure at his physical touches. Tolerating Tennouji would pay off in his favor, he convinced himself.
Nowaki found himself wasting multiple spread out days trying to catch up with this man. He put time aside in his afternoon or mornings to speak with him. Tennouji also put time aside to speak to Nowaki. He wasn't annoyed at having to speak to him. In between his smaller cases, Nowaki and Tennouji exchanged tidbits of their lives.
Tennouji remained the same good-hearted guy whose social circle expanded beyond comprehension. The model refreshing type that Nowaki stole tactics from to use throughout his jobs.
Throughout their conversations, Nowaki found out that Tennouji kept ties with his previous occupation and various emergency personnel employees. As much as he loved his old job, Tennouji liked being a private investigator. He found new purpose in reuniting people who were lost or wanted to find out the identity of their parents. His friends helped open doors for Tennouji to conduct investigations without roadblocks.
Nowaki could only dream of having such a large web of connections for his own use.
During one of their meetups, Nowaki finally brought up Hiroki. "Kamijou-san was an old classmate of mine that I lost touch with when I went abroad. He was my tutor and helped to elevate me enough to graduate high school and enter college. I have so much to thank him for and I don't know if you could help me find him. If it wasn't too much trouble."
Tennouji chuckled. "No need to be so hesitant, Wa-chan. Of course, I would help you. If someone was this influential in transforming you into a doctor, I will do everything in my power to help."
Nowaki bowed his head low, laying on the sheepishness in his voice. "I-I don't know what to say. You must have so much to do and-"
"Nonsense!" Tennouji insisted. "I have some time to spare during the weekend." Taking out his phone, he asked. "What was his name again?"
Nowaki answered. "Kamijou Hiroki."
"At least Tennouji was good for something." Nowaki muttered as he paused in front of the apartment complex Hiroki moved into.
While he checked around the apartment, he noticed there was no front desk security. There was a wall of mailboxes with the apartment number written on the box. A large poster board was on the other wall, showing colorful fliers and other advertisements.
Excitement rushed through Nowaki.
This was far too easy.
For all the excitement Nowaki experienced, concerned soon filled up his elation. Hiroki left himself open for anyone to walk in and hurt him. This wouldn't do. Hiroki needed to move at an apartment complex where security was top priority. Better than this current location.
Then again, Nowaki wouldn't be able to go inside and touch Hiroki's possessions.
Never mind.
Hiroki would move into a better apartment in the future. Move into a pricier apartment complex that Nowaki could pay with his doctor's salary. Leaving Hiroki to have more time to relax in their home. Hiroki might lessen his professor hours or even retire early and let Nowaki take care of him. Nowaki didn't mind being the breadwinner. Hiroki deserved to stay at home and read all the books he wanted.
Looking directly at the elevator, he noted that people pushed the up button, and the elevator was called down. People entered and exited the elevator without issue. There was no need for a key fob. One could walk inside, enter the elevator, and push the button to go up the right floor.
Nowaki mentally noted these aspects of the apartment and retreated.
He would return with a better plan in how to infiltrate Hiroki's apartment.
Soon enough, Nowaki got into the routine of sneaking his way inside of Hiroki's apartment before he went to his residency hours.
The thrill of snapping photos of Hiroki while he slept was a good start to his mornings. Well, on the mornings Nowaki had time to visit Hiroki. After all, Nowaki's hours were becoming tighter, leaving him less room to come and go as he pleased. It was almost as if the universe was against Nowaki. He couldn't have a great day without being in Hiroki's vicinity.
The prizes he snatched during those visits were either in his pocket or kept inside of his apartment. His shrine to his lover was large and booming. More and more items were added to the collection after every visit. He forced himself not to grab Hiroki's important possessions. Nowaki used his will power to not remove a book Hiroki enjoyed or his glasses. Doing so would give Hiroki an idea that someone broke into his apartment.
Nowaki soothed himself with the fact that Hiroki stopped accepting dates.
Hiroki had not slept with another man since Nowaki returned from America. Through his interventions, Hiroki's dates dropped him due to thinking Hiroki was cheating on a lover or were intimidated by Nowaki's own hands. Of course, he hid his face with a face mask. He wasn't dumb enough to let these men know who he was and report him to the police.
Nowaki ignored Hiroki's discouraged disposition over the lack of dates. From afar, Nowaki saw Hiroki's longing glances whenever he looked at couples. He was doing this for Hiroki's own good. None of those men were good enough for him. They were not at Hiroki's level and would do nothing more than to bring him down.
Throughout these years of pining for Hiroki, Nowaki was growing desperate. He wanted to find the right opportunity to make his presence known. Hiroki couldn't go on without knowing that Nowaki became a doctor. How he was now worthy of Hiroki's notice.
Yet, there was never a right time for Nowaki to step in and make himself known.
Nowaki was losing his patience.
And his mind was swirling with want and desire.
In his planning process, the idea of the buying the cabin came from overhearing an overly amorous man talk about his weekend getaway with his fiancé.
Nowaki listened with half an ear as daydreams of himself and Hiroki living in the woods filled his mind. They would be far away from civilization, away from influences that would turn Hiroki against him. They would only need each other. Keep one another company as Nowaki finished off the last bit of his residency in another hospital. Surely, there was another hospital who would accept him.
Taking out his phone, Nowaki looked for a real estate agent for the more rural areas. As he investigated, he walked away from the gossip, uninterested in playing along any longer.
Nowaki needed to start preparing his love nest.
Fiddling with his black face mask, Nowaki watched from behind a building as Hiroki swayed on his feet. The obvious signs of drunkenness caused concern. Throughout the times he managed to follow Hiroki, his beloved preferred drinking in his apartment so as to not stumble into unwanted situations. A means to not encounter fights, drunken jealous boyfriends, and pass out on his own floor.
His heart wrenched when Hiroki almost fell onto the street. This happened again and again. Almost as if Hiroki's equilibrium caused his legs to turn into jelly. ANy distance Hiroki managed to walk, he stepped onto the road and went back on the sidewalk immediately.
Walking closer, Nowaki dodged a trash can in time before he bumped into it. He had more than enough time to hide somewhere due to the darkness of the road. The flickering lights only emphasized the portion they illuminated. His love wouldn't have known it was him.
Another sway made Nowaki hiss under his breath.
Usami didn't have the forethought of calling his Hiro-san a cab. How careless of him. He didn't think of his beloved's safety and the danger of being hit by a car. This was unacceptable.
The next time Hiroki wandered on the street; a car screeched in an attempt to stop. Hiroki, dazed out of his mind, paused in place. His bag slipped from his shoulder, falling onto the street as the car hit him.
Hiroki's body slammed onto the car. The glass shattered, the hood bent from the impact, and his papers blew into the wind. Hiroki's blood splattered onto the car, trickling in the bent crevices of the car. It didn't take long for Hiroki to slide off the car, landing onto the road. Various limbs of his body were bent in odd directions and his blood seeped onto his clothes and the papers that landed underneath him.
Nowaki waited until the car escaped the scene of the crime. It was expected for the person not to help. The driver was possibly drunk on account of the swerving before impact. The person didn't care enough to call the police before speeding down the street.
Rushing to Hiroki's side, Nowaki was careful in picking up Hiroki in his arms. His groans of pain were pieces of shrapnel to Nowaki's heart. Nowaki held back the urge to pepper Hiroki's face with kisses. His yearning grew exponentially as time passed on. The photos and watching him sleep did nothing to quench his thirst. He wanted to collect him in his arms and devour his pouty mouth and bury himself inside of him.
Overhearing Hiroki's painful groans, Nowaki winced in sympathy. His new apartment contained medical equipment for him to use to keep Hiroki asleep and dress his wounds. After all, he prepared everything in order to keep Hiroki from leaving him ever again.
"Doctor Kusama Nowaki, sounds about right. Doesn't it?"
TBC