Friend Zone

Spock was seated on his meditation mat but he was not meditating. He had not been able to meditate successfully since returning to the Enterprise, and tonight was no different. His mind was frequently disturbed by thoughts of Nyota Uhura, his wife.

He could not find his center and he was beginning to suspect that she was the key. Dr. McCoy had said 'happy wife, happy life'. Perhaps it was a true idiom because Spock's wife was not happy and neither was he.

He was quite surprised to hear the door to his suite open and close. No one would dare such a blatant breach of etiquette and disturbed his privacy. Not even the Captain would just barge in unannounced. Only one person had ever dared to do so.

"Mr. Spock?"

"Lieutenant Uhura, you honor me with your visit," Spock said rising from the floor. He was dressed in all black, only wearing his Starfleet issued undershirt and pants, what many crewmen often wore during their off duty time.

"I'm sorry to disturb you. But I need answers, Mr. Spock."

"I will do my best to oblige."

He directed Uhura to the chair at his desk while he took a seat on his bed, the only other place to sit.

"What are we doing here?" Uhura started right in.

"Please elaborate?"

"what are the two of us doing, what are we to one another?"

spock's face took on a far off look and he seemed to be in deep contemplation. "Lt. I believe we agreed that you would decide what 'we" are when you are ready?"

"Ok, but why have you been ignoring me?"

"You asked me to give you time and space. You didn't want to announce our relationship to the crew."

"What relationship?"

Spock was silent. What did she want him to say? They were bonded.

when he didn't answer she said, "There, you see Mr. Spock I've discovered something about you I don't like."

"And what is that?"

"You're a coward."

"Indeed?"

"Indeed," she said with emphasis "we are bonded or married or mated or something and yet I spend most of my time either hiding out with Sulu or alone. Sulu is not my husband, you are. I feel like I'm not free and I'm not attached. What am I? What are we?"

"You are my wife by Vulcan custom and Federation law and I am your husband," and Sulu is not! Spock thought.

"Oh," she said is that all said clearly disappointed.

"Clearly my answer disappoints you."

"Mr. Spock before we were bonded we used to be friends, at least I thought we were friends... I even thought we might even be a bit more than friends actually," she confessed.

"Indeed?" Was she admitting she had feelings for him?

"Yes indeed, or why else did you... you...I mean, We've been through so much together. Illness and injury, to hear Sulu tell it we were practically dating, and now... now nothing. Just wham bam thank you mam?"

Spock raised that eyebrow of his letting her know he did not appreciate her phrasing.

"I don't believe I agree with your conclusion."

"No? And why not? Where is the fault in my logic, Mr. Spock?"

"I am trying to give you what you want, trying to respect..."

"You don't know what I want, you never have. You never ask Mr. Spock did you know that? You assume you conclude, you deduce, you reckon, but you never ask. You always think you know what's best for everyone else but you never ask. Do you know what that makes you? Arrogant Mr. Spock, you are arrogant."

"Is that so? I do apologize ms Uhura for my lack of hubris I was unaware of the defect."

"Well, I'm aware and I'm sick of it. And I'm also aware that you've been avoiding me so that makes you arrogant and a coward Mr. Spock."

"And how do you propose I rectify the situation, Miss Uhura, as my friend and my wife you must have a solution in mind?"

Uhura forgot how much she enjoyed just talking to Spock, just sparring with him verbally. There was a time when she would relish challenging his stodgy demeanor, would bask in the glow of his attention. What happened to the confident woman who openly flirted with her commanding officer on the bridge no less? That woman had been cowed for too long but no longer."

"I've been a coward too," she admitted, "but I don't want to be. I don't like it.," She said softly. "I'm sorry I hit you. I didn't mean it, I hope you know that I was just-"

"angry. You were angry at me," he finished her thought.

"No, I was not angry at you, well maybe just a wee bit. But I was mostly angry at myself, at the situation. I'm still angry and I don't know why. But I'm not angry at you per-se. You just annoyed me."

"I apologize for my failure."

"Spock, why have you been ignoring me?"

"I was doing what I thought you wanted. I was giving you the space you needed and I was honoring your desire to keep our marital status private."

"You were supposed to act normally though. By ignoring me and avoiding me you just set all the gossiping tongues wagging. They think something is going on between us because nothing is going on between us."

"That is illogical."

"That is human logic."

"It is human but it is hardly logical," he quipped.

Uhura smiled. "See, this is us."

"What is what?" he asked confused.

"This," she waved a hand between the two of them. "This. Us. Talking like friends. This is what I miss."

"I see."

"Do you? I may not be ready for a husband right now, but I could sure use a friend. Do you think you can do that? Just be my friend until I'm ready for something more?"

How could he say no to that? She was not asking for a divorce or to end their relationship completely. She just wanted to maintain the status quo. His wife just wanted to be friends. Like she was friends with Sulu. Or Scotty. Or Checkov. No problem right?

"I will always be your friend," Spock reassured her but inside he felt...something else.

"Thank you, Spock." She leaned over and kissed his cheek and before he knew what was happening she was gone leaving only the scent of her perfume behind.