While sparing with Uhura, Spock receives a few low blows and deals some of his own.
Seeking His Level
The Enterprise limped along to Vulcan on impulse power, her Vulcan escort riding shotgun. That meant the crew had an abundance of time on their hands when they were not working their shifts or doing repairs. Spock decided it was a perfect time to help Uhura find a way to relax and learn to control her response to the new Vulcan hormones coursing through her body. He tried to teach her his meditation techniques several times, but she didn't enjoy sitting still. She was a physical person who felt best when she was on the move, so reluctantly, he agreed to continue teaching her Suus Mahna, the Vulcan martial arts he practiced.
Uhura had sparred with Spock several times and knew some fundamentals, so she picked up the moves fairly easily. But she wanted to learn some real fighting skills. Starfleet taught several types of hand-to-hand combat disciplines, but she wanted to learn the one Spock used. She especially wanted to learn the Vulcan nerve pinch.
Spock reserved a private gym located near their crew quarters to go over some basic moves with Uhura. She was dressed in a standard-issue workout leotard made up of a crop top and short-shorts over leggings. She stood on the exercise mat doing some basic stretches, bending over gracefully while trying to coax Spock into teaching her how to stealthy subdue someone from behind.
"Aduna," Spock said while he watched her bend and stretch slowly, "you do not possess the strength required to properly perform the Vulcan nerve pinch."
"Is this another one of those fancy Vulcan things no human can do?" she asked. She peered at him upside down from between her widespread legs.
"I would not say 'no human', but I have tried to each the captain, and he has yet to accomplish it."
"Well, I'm not the captain. I am sure there is a way for us mere humans to do it and you and I are going to figure it out."
"Yes," he said while admiring her short-shorts. "If there is a way, I have not discovered it. But I have no doubt if it's humanly possible you will succeed."
Uhura beamed at the high praise and sprinted over to give Spock a tight embrace. "Aww, thank you, Adun. Thank you for always believing in me."
Spock returned the embrace and, as always, he reveled in the feel of his wife in his arms. "You are one of the most capable people I know. You deserve no less."
They held each other for a long moment until Uhura felt Spock's hand creep down her backside and she pulled away. And he was supposed to be teaching her control? "Okay, then Mister. Let's try something easy first. How about that big sharp weapon you use, the lirpa? Can I try that?"
"No. It is much too heavy and unwieldy for you. You could easily strain yourself and cause injury."
Uhura confronted him with her hands on her hips. "You think because I am pregnant I can't fight, don't you?"
"No. I think because you are smaller and less muscular that you would find it difficult to lift, let alone swing the lirpa effectively as a weapon. If you must use a Vulcan-style weapon, then I think the fighting pike would suit you better." Spock went to his storage locker and came back with a long pole with a dull blade attached to the end. It looked like an ordinary spear, but it was taller than Uhura and made of metal.
"That?" Uhura looked skeptical.
"This is what young Vulcans have used to train in self-defense for generations. I believe women prefer it in combat situations. It can be deceptively lethal in the right hands." He effortlessly tossed the weapon to Uhura, and she caught it easily, but then nearly dropped it. It was also deceptively heavy.
"I thought you said this would be easier? Is this thing made of lead?" She asked while she hefted it and tested its weight.
"No, a durillium alloy. Now let me show you how to hold it."
Before Spock would approach her, Uhura swirled the pole around her body quickly. The blade end just narrowly missed slicing a piece out of Spock's shirt as she put on her little demonstration.
Spock looked both distressed at her carelessness and impressed with her technique. "Where did you learn to do that?"
Uhura planted the dull end of the pole down on the matted floor and looked at the weapon with respect. "Oh, I know my way around a pole." She pretended to polish it and then took it up again, swinging it this way and that.
Spock watched her with undisguised admiration. She never ceased to amaze him with her talents. "I was unaware of your proficiency," he said
"Oh, yeah sugar. You didn't think this was the first pole I've handled, did you?" she gave him one of her mischievous grins as she worked the pole around her body again.
Spock quirked a brow. "I was under the impression that mine was the first."
"Tee hehe," she chuckled playfully. "I'm not that innocent. Though I must admit, this is the first pole I've used with such a pointy tip. I bet I could really prick something with this."
Spock nodded in agreement. "Indeed, a Vulcan's fighting pike has to be handled very carefully."
"Oh? I haven't been too rough with yours, have I? I always try to be gentle with my playthings." Uhura stroked her hand up and down the polished length of the pole affectionately.
"Um... No, you are always very gentle, Aduna." Spock's voice had suddenly got very husky. "But perhaps I could teach you a more refined technique?"
"You know I'm always open to learning new things. C'mon. Show me how to handle your pole." She crooked her finger to beckon him forward.
Spock showed her a few basic defensive moves with the fighting stick and she practiced over and over until she was almost exhausted. Their time in the reserved gym was almost up, and Uhura wanted to test her new skills before they left.
"C'mon. Let's really spar. Come at me, Mister!" Uhura taunted Spock.
"I don't think that would be wise, Aduna."
"Why not. How else am I gonna learn to fight and defend our baby?" She danced around Spock with the pole.
"I will defend you and our child. You are not learning to fight, you are learning strength and balance, and most importantly, control," he reminded her.
"Fuck that! I'm not an invalid. I can defend myself. Come on!" she taunted him with the spear tip, dancing around him, staying just out of reach.
"Nyota," he said with his stern Vulcan husband's voice. "This is most inappropriate. You could be injured."
"I'm fine. You'd never hurt me. Nobody has more control than you. And I promise I'll be gentle," she teased him.
Spock could see she wouldn't back down until they had fought, so he planned a strategy that would disarm her with minimal impact. His plan set, he approached her calmly and gracefully.
Uhura took a moment to admire his physical beauty. Spock had removed his shirt while training her and now there was a thin sheen of perspiration covering his olive-hued skin. His muscles rippled as he moved in on her like a predator, and Uhura couldn't take her eyes off his body. She licked her lips and waited for his attack in the defensive pose he'd taught her.
He struck like a viper, so quickly she almost didn't see it coming, but she was well trained and she quickly countered and evaded him. "Ha! You thought you could get me that easily?" she taunted him.
Spock was impressed with her skill and agility. "You have proven time and time again that you are very hard to get. Still, I shall persevere," he said, never losing concentration.
"Oh really? Then come and get me," she taunted him again.
He did. Spock didn't even wait for her to finish taunting before he struck. Before she could even think, Uhura did a quick crouch, sweeping the pole under his legs, which he easily evaded. However, she then followed with a sweeping kick, which she landed knocking him on his back. Then she then pounced on top of him and placed the pole across his throat.
Breathing heavily, bosom heaving, she said, "Not bad for a pregnant woman, huh?"
"Indeed. How did you manage that?" He asked as he gazed up into his wife's triumphant face with unabashed admiration.
Uhura shrugged her shoulders like it was nothing. "You do know I used to run track and field? Pole vault was my favorite event."
"Ah yes. I should have suspected. But that doesn't explain your victory in combat."
"Well, I used your advantages against you. You are bigger, stronger, and your limbs are longer. I am no match for you in brute force or strength. But I'm small, agile, and quick. Plus, I know you were holding back. I just needed to get you down to my level. The sooner I got you on your back, the better for me."
"That seems to be a recurring theme with us," Spock said.
"Oh, hush up!" She bent down and gave him a quick kiss. "I think you enjoy it when I'm on top." She rocked her hips suggestively.
Before Spock could answer, someone knocked on the window of the door.
"Hey! I can see you in there. Why don't you two go get a room?" the intruder yelled.
Uhura looked up, but she didn't take the pike away from Spock's neck.
"We're in a room," she called out in answer.
"A private room," the person said.
"This is a private room!" she yelled back.
The door opened and Dr. McCoy entered. "This is a private workout room, not a bordello. These mats were designed to absorb sweat, not any other bodily fluids."
"Oh my god, Doctor!" Uhura tossed the pike aside so she could cover Spock's ears with her hands. "I cannot believe you just said that."
McCoy let out an annoyed huff and walked to his storage locker. "Spock's a grown-ass man. He's heard worse than that and he knows what I'm talking about. There is no need to defend his chastity. Now, I don't know what you two were doing in here, and I don't want to know. Just do it in your own quarters, hmm?"
"We weren't doing anything wrong, we were just playing," Uhura said.
McCoy stopped what he was doing in the storage locker and turned to gape at Uhura. "Spock playing? I'd like to see that."
"Apparently you did, peeping through that window. What are you doing in here?" Uhura demanded.
"Your time is up, Missy. I've booked this room for its intended purpose. Exercise."
"We were exercising, Doctor." Uhura defended them, giving McCoy a stern look.
"On your backs? Exercising your libidos doesn't count. Look, I get it. You're newlyweds and now you're pregnant and you've got all those hormones raging. But deal with it on your own time. The captain will be here any minute, and I suggest you don't let him catch you two doing things like this."
At that, Spock finally sat up and joined in the conversation. "Why not Doctor?"
"It's unprofessional, for one thing," McCoy groused.
Spock bristled at that. He was never unprofessional. "What my wife and I do off duty is our own business. Jim is hardly a prude or one to shy away from human expressions of affection," Spock said.
"That's just it. Human expressions of affection. Spock, Jim is your best friend but I think he sees you as this Vulcan paragon. To see you behaving... well like a horny teenager, I think it disturbs his equilibrium. I'm sure he'll get used to it eventually, but I think it will take some time for him to accept you as... well, a normal man."
Spock helped Uhura to her feet and then stood face to face with McCoy. "I have always been a normal man, Doctor."
"Spock, don't get your knickers in a knot. I didn't mean anything by it. Maybe I can't speak for Jim, but I think we both just see you, saw you, as being above all this basic human emotion. It's kinda disappointing seeing you brought down to our level, that's all."
"Brought down!" Uhura said, stepping in between the two men. "Now wait a minute, Doctor. Just what are you trying to say? That I am somehow bringing Spock down? Because I am not afraid or ashamed to love my husband, you think I'm bringing him down?" The look she gave McCoy curdled his stomach.
Uhura's angry stance reminded him of the Horta protecting her brood. He was lucky Uhura didn't have that creature's power to burn him to a crisp. "That is not what I said at all," he tried to backpedal too late. He looked at Spock for help and found his friend staring at him with cold, dark eyes. It was at that moment Dr. McCoy realized he had fucked up. He had stepped on a hornet's nest while trapped in a room with an overprotective Vulcan and his pregnant wife. He looked around the room at the very sharp looking weapons scattered about. What the hell were these two "playing" anyway?
Luckily, Spock turned away from him and addressed Uhura. "Aduna, I don't think that Bones meant to insult us, did you, Doctor?" Spock turned back to give McCoy a stone faced look but his eyes warned to tread carefully.
McCoy held up his hands in surrender. "I absolutely meant no disrespect to you or your lovely wife. If I have offended you in any way, I apologize for my rudeness."
"I take no offense, Doctor. However, I do not speak for my lovely wife."
Uhura looked ready to run McCoy through with the fighting pike. She took a look at Spock's face, which appeared as calm as ever, and something in her settled down. She could see the tension coiled in his muscles, ready to attack and defend her, but he waited. Right now, Uhura was in control of the situation. She finally understood the need for own self-control. If she were to be a good wife to Spock, she couldn't let her emotions cloud his. She took a deep, calming breath and relented. Her family was safe. That was all that mattered. She touched Spock's bare back with her hand and felt the tension drain from his body at the contact.
Spock offered his hand. Two fingers extended to her, and she grabbed it with her own. "I'm sorry, Adun," she apologized. "You know I've not been myself lately. I'm sorry for getting so upset."
"You have no cause for apologies. You were not at fault." They let their fingers linger in the touch for a few moments. McCoy could tell something intimate was passing between them, and he looked away. Shortly, Spock withdrew his hand and asked Uhura to wait for him outside.
When Uhura left, Spock calmly collected their weapons and put them away in the storage locker. Then he gathered their personal gear, such as towels and water bottles, and placed them in a gym bag. He neither looked at nor spoke to the doctor while he completed his task. Not until he had put the room in order and had his bag packed on his shoulder did he address McCoy. "Doctor," Spock nodded and turned to leave, but McCoy stopped him.
"Wait, Spock. You know I say a lot of dang fool things. I hope I haven't hurt you and Uhura? You know how I like to joke with you?"
"Doctor, in all the years I have known you, you have made jokes at my expense. I ignored them because though the words were offensive, I knew you did not intentionally mean to offend me."
"No! Wait a minute," Bones tried to say, but Spock continued.
"I have tolerated your failed attempts at HUMOR. Over a lifetime of such taunts, I have developed a thick skin. But if I were fully human or if you had made such remarks to the younger version of myself, I may have done something to you I would later regret. Thankfully, I am not the angry young man I used to be, and I am in full control of my emotions. However, I will never tolerate insult to she who is my wife. Is that clear?"
"Spock I am sorry. I never meant to offend you or hurt you in any way with my foolish words. And Uhura is the sweetest thing on this ship. I would never insult her. I apologize for my ill-advised words."
"Sometimes I let my mouth get far away from my brain, you know that. Or as we used to say down-home, I stuck my foot in it." He smiled ruefully. "Believe it or not, I only teased you back in the early days because I liked you and I wanted to get to know you better. But it seemed you only responded to my childish taunts. However, it was petty and juvenile and I am sorry," McCoy said in all sincerity.
Spock nodded once and turned to go but McCoy stopped him again, sensing all was still not settled. "But you have to understand, Spock. When I call you a pointy-eared bastard, it's only because I actually like your ears. It's like a term of affection." McCoy smiled, hoping Spock would understand and harbor no hard feelings between them.
"That is highly illogical, Doctor."
"That is highly human. Didn't Amanda ever call you anything other than Spock? Like a little stinker or a rugrat or something similar as an affectionate term?"
Spock conceded the point. "Perhaps. I have been called "that boy" or "the boy" for over thirty years now."
"See, there you go. Illogical human behavior," McCoy said, feeling as if everything was finally settled and forgiven.
"Very well Doctor. I thank you for your honesty. However, I think it best that I do not tell my wife about your attraction to me. She is, after all, human and has a tendency towards jealousy."
"Wait what!? Attracted to you? What the devil are you talking about now?"
Spock nodded sagely. "Yes, Bones I understand now. You said it yourself, you "LIKED" me, and I did not respond favorably to your advances. Human courtship rituals were baffling to me at the time, but I do understand such teasing is part of the mating process."
"I was not making advances towards you, you pointy-eared devil!" Bones fumed.
"Please Doctor," Spock held up a hand to halt McCoy's outraged rant. "As I had to explain to Nurse Chapel, I am extremely pleased with my wife and want no other. You may cease with your terms of endearment now."
McCoy was just about to protest to high heaven when he realized Spock wasn't serious. That pointy-eared bastard was fucking with him! He was so worried Spock would corrupt Uhura that it had never occurred to him that she might corrupt Spock.
"Get out of here Spock! Go take care of your wife," McCoy groused and shooed him away. "I would think such antics were beneath you."
"Apparently, I have been brought down to your level." Spock tipped his head to McCoy once more before he left the room.
McCoy shook his head. Spock's sharpest weapon had always been his rapier wit. "Touché," McCoy said, as he went back to his locker. "Touché."