Jacob's POV
I startle awake when a loud knock echoes throughout my room and i sit and look around room quickly. My eyes land on my window, where i thought it came from. the curtains were open. I guess I forgot to close them. I hop out of my bed and go to the window yawning and scratching my neck. I look out the window but see nothingness. Trees in the distance somethings laying around on the ground. I was about to close my curtains when I see something moving from the corner of my eye.
Is that a... tail, yes An oddly colored tail at that. It took a minute for my brain to catch up with everything and when it did i pulled up the window so fast it nearly broke. I lean my upper body out and look around. When I look to the side of my house I was surprised to see hoshi and a blushing aidzuki. I want to say something but the shock of seeing him had my mouth hanging open unable to even think.
Aidzuki has never been emotional enough to run away from whatever was bothering him. But then again he's never been soooo... Wait why did he run away? Nothing happened that should of upset him to the point of running away instead of talking to me. That also surprised me, when I came home i expected him to be sitting on my bed ready to burst with emotion. Like he always does.
Which lead me to believe that it was about me or involved me. But he'd usually keep it to himself, if it were about me, untill he couldn't and tell me. But he'd run away so he must've not wanted me to figure out. Well that's to bad cause he sure as hell owes me an explanation. So i come to my senses and look at him, he's standing with one pale hand raised to knock again a blush coloring his whole face and neck. He WAS expecting me to notice him knocking right? Not that he is aware but my senses have been getting sharper. His beautiful bright blue eyes were wide and unsure, plump pink lips parted slightly in surprise over all he made an adorable sight. I would have laughed but I'm sure I look kind of the same. I mentally slap myself and push of my window frame and back away to make room for him to jump in.
He takes a while but is in my room a minute later. He doesn't meet my eyes instead he's looking down at his shoes one scuffing the floor and his hands clasped together.
"Why?" I ask to get things started.
"Why? Why what?" He replies playing dumb.
"Don't do that aidzuki. Please. I have been going crazy without knowing how or where you are. And since you left without saying anything, effectively scaring the shit out of me, I think I more then deserve an explanation for your sudden need to run off." I say pacing back and forth while making wild gestures with my hands.
He opens his mouth to explain but i turn to him sharply and fix a hard stare on him. "And don't lie to me aidzuki"
Aidzuki pov
I gulp and nod "I was upset, very upset, for reasons I'm not really ready to share with you. hell I've barely come to terms with it myself. But after I ran i uhm, konda ended up in the middle of the forest. After a couple of hours I was found by some nice people who gave me a place to stay. That's where I've been"
When there was nothing but silence after my very awkward and half assed rushed explanation I decide to chance a look at the suddenly quiet native and was not at all surprised to see a hard look on his face.
"That's it. So some people find you and you just go with them! What the hell man! Do you know what could've happened to you? Did you even know them? Who am I kidding, you'd rather jump off a cliff then talk to people!" he exclaims throwing his hands up.
"Next time tell me before you just leave so i know where you are and not having a heart attack searching for you like a mad man" he scoffed.
I glare at him, well at his feet more like."shut up Gesu yarō. And actually I did know them for your information. They were friends of mine from school. Why does it matter anyways? So What I can't go places without your consent? I'm not your pet jacob! I may have ears and a tail but I'm not your pet and you can't control me!" I know it's not what he was trying to say and he was just concerned. But all rational thoughts have left. I'm just so tired. "I don't know why I even thought I needed to explain myself to you. You're my friend not my father. Actually I bet if bella were here you would just pat me on my back and say 'yay you're back, there's food in the fridge' then just ignore me and talk to her, and hug her, and give all your attention to her and only her. It's like she's a piece of shiny gold and I'm just dirt you kick away to get to her."
"Aidzuki i-"
"No jacob don't. Why do you pretend to care! You-" I'm cut off by a sudden soft pair of lips against mine. My eyes widen as my brain catches up and I realize that I'm being kissed. By jacob.
Oh kami. 'this cant really be happening' I think as my wide eyes unwillingly glide shut as the sensation overtakes me. I shudder when my surprise turns into pleasure. I try not to lose myself in the sensation but It feels so amazing. Like electricity running through my body, the tingles from just simple touching seem to have intensified tenfold. It feels so good, and so surprisingly right that I have to fight back a moan from escaping my mouth.
He grabs my hips and pull me flat against his front slowly moving his hands to my back to keep me in place crushing me to his hard chest and stomach, i shiver violently again at the utter warmth. I could feel as the place between my thighs became hard. I slide my hands up his biceps to his strong shoulders and pull him closer as well as I start moving my lips against his.
He groans lowly and began moving in sync with me, a bit aggressively. And I squeak a little in surprise to feel an erection pressed against my stomach. All it did was throw me deeper into bliss as my pants became even tighter then before. I accidentally let a high pitched moan slip past my lips and press my growing erection against Jacob's leg and he tenses under my hands.
He pulls away with wide eyes and jerks his hands away from around my waist causing me to stumble forward a little. Then suddenly I'm looking at a well muscled olive brown back.
"Jake? Why-" I stop abruptly not knowing what I wanted to ask him exactly. Why did he kiss me? or why did he stop? I look at him to see his shoulders heaving. I reach out a hand to try and calm him but he jerks away from my touch and speaks before I could question it.
"Please leave" I take a step back at the lack of emotion in his voice.
"What!? Why?" He gets upset about my absence then I come back, for his wellbeing by the way, and he wants me to leave! Cause he got all emotional and kissed me. the absolute hell.
"Please just go. Out of my room I mean. I'm sorry I kissed you. I really didn't want or mean to" my heart sinks at those words. Did he not like it as much as I had. I mean I fucking loved it! Why would he do it in the first place if its not what he wanted. Maybe he found out I'm harbouring secret feelings for him and decided to test it out and see if it was true? It's not like I'm very good at hiding things from him. And maybe running away tipped him off.
But I was always able to hide the painfully deep feelings I had for him for the sake of our friendship. I know things here are different from my home. It was normal for mated pairs or lovers to consist of the same gender, but it's not really ideal for most here, so I could understand why jacob is silently freaking out. He was taught differently, what he grew up seeing was men marrying and falling in love with women so i dont blame him for how he's currently reacting.
I glimpse at his back one last time before I abide by his wishes and leave and go into my given room and laying down not knowing how to feel.
Happy that he kissed me, sad that I repulsed him cause I couldn't control myself, angry that he sent me away after I came back. Those are some very good options right? But I just feel numb and my head hurts. first I'm having fun with my best friend, then I'm running from said friend cause they're obsessed with another mutual friend, then I'm meeting vampires and nearly killing one with my weird puberty, next I'm back home scared of how jacob would react, then we argue, then he kisses me, then i dry hump his leg most likely confirming that I'm gay for him, then he kicks me out his room in a panic. Sigh, I'm done with today.
I yawn and snuggle down In my bed, which is not as comfy as the ones at the cullen mansion, and fall asleep.
Jacob's POV
After aidzuki leaves my room I sit on my bed with my head in my hands and my eyes shut tight as I sigh in frustration.
I'm such an idiot.
You just had to kiss him didn't you? Just couldn't ignore the urge huh? Only God knows i tried. But he was so upset and I just wanted to fix that but I'm pretty damn sure I just made it worse. Laying down on my bed I stare at the ceiling though I'm not seeing to distracted by my thoughts.
I wonder how this is making aidzuki feel. Is he angry with me or confused? Most likely both and I'd understand completely if he were it was my doing after all and I shouldn't have despite the fact I really wanted to. Now I might lose my best friend.
Or maybe he'd let it go cause he did kiss me back and didn't make an attempt to push me away. Which I won't read into much. Maybe he was caught up in the moment and didn't know what to do so he kissed me back. Or maybe he feels the same way I do...
Nah. Impossible. He would've told me. Right?
As I have said before he's not that good at hiding things from me so I would've known by now... right?
I know that lately my feelings for him have changed and I'm still trying to decide if that's a good thing or a bad thing. See, it used to be a very intense crush that I hoped to get over but now it's like at the very thought of him marrying someone or of someone even touching him in anyway makes me possesive of him. I snort, It's like I wanna keep him close and beet anyone's ass that even looks at him a certain way.
I feel blood rush to my cheeks as I think about the other things my body and mind have made me think and do. I have a huge desire to dominate him in you know... that way. I've often woken up in a cold sweat at night extremely hard cause of wet dreams I had involving the dark haired beauty known as aidzuki. In the dreams I would be feral growling and snarling and biting him thrustind fast and hard deep within him but he would just arch his back while mewling and whimpering my name in pleasure. Which would make me need to take care of my hard on or take a cold shower no longer sleepy afterwards.
I shift a little on my bed to find a comfortable spot. I wasn't sure if I could face him after that but then I decided that what he doesn't know won't hurt him. But then it did cause I fucking kiss him like the love sick puppy I am becoming.
I should see bella tomorrow, I really need someone to talk to and she might get my mind off of this mess I made. I could easily lose myself with bella when aidzuki wasn't around. She's the only one beside aidzuki that understands me. I'm pretty sure if cullen wasn't around then me and bella would be a thing and I wouldn't have to worry about being a black sheep on the rez. A gay black sheep. I'm aware that this makes me sound like a coward, but you couldn't really understand unless you were in my shoes. I have a do lot of things to consider shall I take on aidzuki instead of bella, though I doubt a taken girl is any better then a boy. I have to consider relationships between me and my father and friends. I could lose them if I pursue aidzuki. And well I could lose aidzuki then what would the point have been.
Thinking is making me tired. I'm gonna go to bed. With that i rest my head on my hand and close my eyes to sleep.
? ﾟﾍﾰ? ﾟﾍﾟTYMEY SKYPEY? ﾟﾍﾕ? ﾟﾍﾸ
(AFTER SCHOOL)
Jacob's POV still
I hum along to the radio as I drive to bella's house a while after I had gotten off of school in order to avoid aidzuki like I've been doing the whole day. The fact we go to separate schools is a big help. I know I'd have to face him eventually but I'll try hard not to for as long as I can.
I drive up to bella house and I could see that her car was there meaning that she was home. I smile at the thought of seeing her as I park and hop out of my car.
My smile disappears when I notice charlie pacing back and forth talking on the phone with someone. He looks extremely worried and kinda scared. I walk up to slowly waiting for him to notice and when he does I see some of the tension in him slip away.
"...yeah, ok. I uh gotta make some more calls. Mmhm... bye." He hangs up the phone and turns to me and searches around me with his eyes. What is he doing? I could see a conclusion being drawn in his eyes and the tension returns with a hint of disappointment.
"Hey there jacob. Have you uhm seen bella today by any chance." He says staring at me with anticipation. So that's it then. Bella's missing. Pffft probably with that cullen. Maybe she did something that displeased him, like sneeze at dinner with his family while eating a salad with a dessert fork or something fancy, and he showed his true murderous colors. Tch, i wouldn't be surprised.
"No sir. Actually I came here to see bella. Is she missing?" I answer.
"I don't know yet. All I know is that her truck is here and she isn't. If she went somewhere she would have told me." He says. I cross my arms over my chest.
"Did you call the cullens? Maybe she went with cullen somewhere and forgot to mention it to you"
"I did but no one's picking up the phone. Hell i even called your house but billy said you never came home either so i thought she'd be with you" you and me both charlie.
"Anyways I gotta make some calls. Billy's probably worried about you. I'm gonna get some help and look for bella. Billy and Henry are gathering some friends to help find her. I was gonna go get billy but since you're here do you mind."
"Not at all" I said heading towards my car.
( eh feuw houwas layteh) hehehe..
I was standing beside billy as he, charlie, and Henry look down at a map on the hood of Charlie's police car. The man who was now in uniform huff in annoyance and stands grabbing his phone.
"Imma call the cullens again" he mumbles distractedly. I see my dad look at charlie with furrowed eyebrows.
"The cullens town left town charlie" billy states.
"good riddens" Henry grumbles out to which he receives a look from charlie.
"Where'd they go?" Charlie ask anxiously as if he were going to find and question them. I wouldn't put it past him he loves bella alot and is willing to do anything for her.
Henry seeing this puts a comforting hand on Charlie's shoulder. "We'll find her charlie." He says reassuringly.
I turn to look around as charlie thanks Henry and i spot non other then sam fucking uley walking out the forest with an unconscious bella in his arms. Was he out there looking for her the whole time! What the hell!
Charlie gasp quietly and runs to his daughter.
"She's okay!" Sam's voice booms as charlie closes the distance between them.
When charlie reaches them he's already reaching to take bella out of sams arms "I got her. Thank you sam" he says more focused on bella then anything else.
I don't know why but just seeing the possible gang leader pisses me off and I start staring daggers at him without my knowledge. He nods towards Henry who nods back.
So Henry sent him out there then. I could've been out there looking to.
I've always known that sam had a connection with the elders well you know him being one and all, but it's different cause despite him running around with his lackys acting like they own the damn place, the other elders respect him greatly which is something that annoys me to no end especially cause my own father's one as well. It's like they're all blind to it.
When I feel eyes on me i come out of my thoughts to see the authoritive look of the same on me. For some reason I feel rhe need to hold his gaze and not look away, like I was proving something. Sam's look changes to one of impatient expectancy a look I'm very familiar with lately. Sam must've gotten what he was looking for cause in the next moment he's nodding at me and turning away.
I turn away as well and head towards dad to get him settled into my car. I wanted to stay and make sure bella is really okay, mentally. But charlie says thank you to those who helped searched for the girl and bid us goodnight. So billy and I are heading home in the next ten minutes and it's obvious billy is tired.
I can't find it in myself to be tired right now cause going home means facing him and that's something I wasn't really ready to do just yet. When I went to get billy I had seen him but since I was in a rush so there wasn't really any post kiss awkwardness, just immense worry. I sigh as I remember just what went down.
(^ _ ⊙)*** I busted through my front door and immediately started searching out my father. When I came across the living room I could see him in there watching TV growling about lost bets. I could see the tension in him since he has already been informed of bella's short but sudden disappearance. I run up to him gaining his attention instantly.
I stop in front of him and was gonna open my mouth to speak when I heard a tiny squeak. I gaze over to see a blushing aidzuki averting baby blue eyes that are now staring at his hands crossed in his lap. At the sight of him I flush in embarrassment and avert my eyes also.
In my panic I forgot he'd come back home... and that I'd kissed him. I heard someone clear their throat and I look at the expectant face of my dad. Oh yeah bella!
"Son may we go I wanna make sure billy is alright. As much as he could be in a situation like this." Billy says and aidzuki's head snaps over to look at billy the confusion clear on his face.
"bella's gone missing" I say hurriedly for aidzuki's benefit.
"What!?" He jumps up no longer bashful.
I nod "her truck was there but she wasn't. And Charlie has already called around and they either said no she wasn't with them or aren't picking up. Come on dad"
I push billy to the front door and aidzuki follows us ready to go. I'm not sure I want that though.
"...aidzuki...Maybe you should stay here. Just in case bella calls... or something" I say avoiding eye contact.
"No way! I wanna help find her to. She's my friend to." He exclaims slightly infuriated.
"I'm going!" He huffs determined.
"No! I really think you should stay here. I don't... I'm not...urgh, I just think it'd be better if you were here." I say looking sternly at him. I give him a pleading look when he just stands there stubbornly with his arms crossed.
He seems caught of gaurd by it but catches the hidden meaning. 'It'll be awkward and distracting if you're around. Just let it go. I'm not ready to be around you yet.' He gives a defeated sigh and nods his head.
"Fine" he says sadly.
That feeling I had last night returns when he frowns but instead of reacting to it I just ignore him and leave the house with billy and one final look at aidzuki. *** /(⊙°⊙)\
It was weird really. Having the need to gather him up in my arms and never let go, hold him close and whisper sweet nothings into his ear untill he felt better. And it would seem denying those feelings have annoying side effects.
The whole drive to charlie house I felt like turning around and giving into everything aidzuki wanted. And when I didn't do that I had a very weird buzzing sound in the back of my head that sounded alot like growling. I ignored it the best I could and eventually it faded away.
Dad kept asking what was wrong, Saying that I was making weird faces and sounds. I just told him that I was worried about bella to which he just nodes but didn't really look like he believed me.
I pull up to the house and see that some lights were still meaning aidzuki was still out and about inside. I exhale and work on getting dad inside so that he can go to bed. He's been yawning for the past five minutes but not actively saying he's tired.
Once we're inside I help him into his bed and he lays down falling asleep quickly. I walk out of his room and go to find the otherworldly hybrid and come across him in the living room on the couch close to the phone sleep.
I let a small smile come to my face at how adorable he look. His hair was draped over his face the only thing visible is his slightly agape mouth, little snores coming out. He was leaning against the arm of the couch probably having dosed off waiting on updates on bella.
The whole scene is cliche I know, but it couldn't really be helped. I turn off the tv and lamp before going over to aidzuki and picking him up and heading to his room.
I stand still when he shift and mumbles something incoherently when he snuggles into my neck I chuckle surprisingly ok with it. No one's around anyway mind as well. I continue on to his room and lay him down in his bed and look down at him as he sighs in content.
He's so adorable.
I find my eyes looking down at what I found out were pillow soft lips.
Should I.
No, no I shouldn't he could wake up and then I'd have to explain myself. But... what if I were careful? And just gave a little peck. Cause for someone with acute senses he sure does sleep heavy.
Man I really shouldn't, I think but I'm already leaning down toward him. As i get closer I couldn't help but admire his strange beauty. His soft features blanketed with creamy white skin that contrast beautifully with his pink lips and elegant blue eyes.
I lay my lips gently on his and close my eyes when fireworks explode in my vision. I slowly pull back and open my eyes glade to see he hadn't woken up. Oh how I wish it was easy to just make him mine.
I push those thoughts away after indulging in them for the first time. I find that I like indulging myself with thoughts of me and him together. I wish.
With one final look in his direction I walk to the door in need of some sleep myself.
"Goodnight aidzuki" I whisper.