A few days later, just when the Dursley were settling down to watch TV after a delicious tea (gammon and eggs, made by Petunia who was quite a good cook but not a patch on Mrs. Weasley) there came a knock at the door.

"Who the blazes is this?" Vernon muttered.

He opened it to reveal a woman with blonde hair set in elaborate curls that contrasted oddly with her square jawed face. She was wearing jewelled spectacles. Her fingers ended in two-inch long nails painted crimson.

"You must be Mr. Dursley, Dudley's father?" she said, shouldering her way inside. "Rita Skeeter, Daily Prophet, Dudley told you I was coming?"

Dudley who was stood at the doorway shook his head. "I forgot," he admitted.

"Not to worry," Rita said. "I'm here to interview Dudley, you know, about his heroics last year?"

"Hang on, what's all this about heroics?"

Rita's eyes widened. "He didn't tell you? Dudley, Dudley—you've been holding out on people."

In truth, Dudley hadn't told his parents because he didn't want them to be worried or, even worse, take him out of school.

"Oh, yeah, a few students got attacked and I helped stop it," Dudley said.

"Attacked?" Vernon grunted.

"Yeah, it wasn't too bad, but Professor Lockhart said someone will want to interview me."

"Quite right, the wizarding world deserves a chance to get to know one of its heroes," Rita said sweetly.

Vernon looked like he was going to press for more details. "Heroes?"

"Quite right, your son saved the day. Now, I don't have that much time, so if you don't mind?"

Vernon gestured into the kitchen. As he closed the door behind him, Dudley heard him saying to Petunia, "Our Dud, quite the little star!"

"Now, Dudley," Rita Skeeter said, getting down to business. She pulled up a chair and opened a large, crocodile skin handbag out of which she withdrew an acid green quill and a bit of parchment.

"Gilderoy sent me an early draft of his book. It seems you two had quite the adventure."

"Yeah, we did," Dudley said, sitting opposite her.

Rita rifled through the pages of Lockhart's draft.

"Ignore the quill, Dudley," Rita said as the quill started to write on its own.

"Dudley Dursley aged 13 has a personality to match his large frame and his giant heart. Bigger than many boys his age, he cut an imposing figure when I sat down to interview him. It was clear that this was a boy who wouldn't back down ..."

"Now, how did you meet Gilderoy?"

And so, Dudley answered all of Rita's questions—how he met Lockhart, his school year, the attacks on the students.

"And what was the school like after the attacks?"

"Scared, I guess," Dudley shrugged. "People didn't know who was next."

The quill was writing "And atmosphere of fear descended on Hogwarts after second year Justin Finch-Fletchley became the second victim of Slytherin's monster."

"And did you all feel adequetely protected?"

"I dunno really,"

"This feeling of helplessness—the worry that Slytherin's monster could be lurking around any corner wasn't helped by the ineptitude of headmaster Albus Dumbledore, who seemed clueless how to respond to the attacks on students." wrote the quill.

Finally, Rita started questioning about the Chamber of Secrets itself.

"Gilderoy writes, and I quote, "Gripping my wand high, I stepped over my fallen comrade who had fallen while carrying the girl to safety. Knowing I only had a split second before the beast was upon me I cast "obliviate" an unorthodox spell to use in a situation like this but it was my only option. Of course I could have used any number of curses, but with Dudley and Luna in the way it was too much of a risk. My spell hit the serpent, stopping it in its tracks as all of its memories—who it was, where it was and what it was doing, went flooding out of it."

Dudley hesitated a second. That wasn't exactly how it had happened. In truth, Lockhart had fallen too. But, he remembered Lockhart saying he intended to embellish and flesh the story out to make it a bettter read.

"Yeah," Dudley said. "He stepped forward, cast obliviate and the snake kinda stopped."

The quill wrote. "The stoic Dudley Dursley's face turned pale as our talk turned to the encounter with Slytherin's serpent. 'Professor Lockhartsaved us' Dudley said, recounting how after he had fallen, Lockhart stepped forward to see off the beast."

"And here," Rita said, later on. "Gilderoy says after he led you and the others to safety, Professor Dumbledore and Professor Snape went to finish the snake off?"

"Yeah,"

"He says Snape used the killing curse on it?" Rita said.

"I dunno, I wasn't there, maybe Snape told Professor Lockhart later," Dudley shrugged. He didn't know what the killing curse was. He assumed, given its name, that it was a curse that killed.

Finally the interview was almost over. "Anything more to add?" Rita asked.

"yeah, erm, did Lockhart say who opened the Chamber?" Dudley asked.

"He says You-Know-Who was posessing Luna Lovegood," Rita replied.

"Yeah, but did he say how?"

"Yes, he says there was a diary containing all of You-Know-Who's secrets. He used that to brainwash Luna Lovegood in the hopes of her following his footsteps as a new dark lord."

Dudley hadn't heard that bit. "Wow," he said, under his breath. It seems Voldemort's plan was more devious than Dumbledore had let on.

"Did he say how the diary arrived in Hogwarts?"

Rita quickly checked the draft of Lockhart's book and shook her head. "No ... why? Do you know?" she said, sharply.

"It was Mr. Malfoy ... Lucius Malfoy. He slipped it in my books, hoping it would be me."

"Are you sure? Why would he do that?" Rita asked.

The quill was scribbling furiously.

"The scandal that erupted last year after Lucius Malfoy was accused of threatening and bribing school governors took a darker turn when Dudley Dursley directly accused Mr. Malfoy of planting the diary into the school." wrote the quill.

"Me and his son don't get along."

This attempt to sully the name of Dudley Dursley and attack muggleborns stemmed from a boyhood dispute between Mr. Malfoy's son, Draco and Dudley who are rivals at school. Quite why and how Lucius Malfoy came into posession of such a dark object which once belonged to You-Know-Who is unclear. What is clear is that Mr. Malfoy endangered the lives of hundreds of students, all for getting revenge on a chilldhood grudge. There is no doubt that the ministry are sure to investigate these claims. For more on Lucius Malfoy's links to Death Eaters see page 7 ..." wrote the quill.

"Excellent Dudley, excellent," Rita said, snapping her handbag closed. "It will make for a thrilling article. Plus that part about Lucius Malfoy adds a great deal of scandal!" Rita said brightly. "The press can make or break a man, remember that Dudley." she winked as she left.

A few days later, an owl arrived delivering a copy of the Daily Prophet. The interview had made the front page with the headline. "Lucius Malfoy Accused of Attacking Muggleborns"

Startling revelations were made by one Dudley Dursley, who gave an exclusive interview to Daily Prophet reporter Rita Skeeter. Mr. Dursley aged 13 accused Lucius Malfoy of being the one who planted the feared diary of You-Know-Who inside Hogwarts, leading to the release of Slytherin's monster which attacked a number of students. The serpent was only defeated thanks to the actions of Gilderoy Lockhart, the noted author, and a selection of second-year students including Dudley Dursley who personally rescued a first-year girl from the beast.

Dudley Dursley alleges that Lucius Malfoy planted the diary as a way to get revenge. Dudley and Lucius's son, Draco, have clashed a number of times during their time at Hogwarts. Mr. Malfoy faced trial of being a Death Eater and it has long being rumored that he maintains an interest in the dark arts. For the full interview with Mr. Dursley, turn to page 2, 3 and 4. For a preview of Gilderoy Lockhart's upcoming book entitled "Boarding with Basilisks" turn to pages 5 and 6. For a report on Lucius Malfoy's links to Death Eaters, see page 7."

A couple of hours later, more owls arrived. One, Dudley recognised as being Errol.

Dudley,

I just read your article in the Prophet. Letting the world know it was Lucius Malfoy! Brilliant! Dad is well chuffed. He is arranging a raid on Malfoy Manor as we speak. It's caused quite a scandal—Mr. Malfoy and Cornelius Fudge were close.

Can't wait to see Malfoy's face next term

Ron

The second was from Hermione.

Dudley,

Wow, I can't believe you were brave enough to accuse Mr. Malfoy directly. It could be dangerous—he's very influential and a former Death Eater. I'd be careful—you don't know what he will plan and he'll definitely want revenge. Still, it's good that people know the truth.

Regards

Hermione

The third letter was from Dean.

Hey, Dud

Wow! That was awesome. Way to stick it to Mr. Malfoy. Even if he doesn't end up in Azkaban, at least everyone knows what scumbags that family is. Can't wait to rub it in Malfoy's face.

Take care

Dean

Dean had also attached a bag of his mum's homemade cookies, which were very delicious.

Finally, Dudley opened the fourth letter.

To my friend, Dudley,

Dudley, Dudley Dudley—talk about making an impact. One of the main rules for an interview is to get the readers talking and you nailed it. Those accusations against Lucius Malfoy are the word on everyone's lips. Preorders for Boarding With Basilisk's are through the roof. It is going to be my best-ever selling book!

Now, a word of advice—stay out of the public's eye. There is a such thing as oversatuation, you know. I suffered from it myself early in my career. Knuckle down at school, keep your head down and then when my books is released, I'll arrange a book signing for us both—can't say fairer than that. I'm sure people would love to meet the secondary hero of Boarding With Basilisks. I see a great future in you, Dudley—like myself, you have an eye for the spotlight. Stick with me and it will beneficial to us both. The public are fascinated by the muggleborn who has defeated You-Know-Who twice now and you need a helping hand to guide you on your path—that's where I come in. So, take my advice—stay low, avoid oversatuating yourself.

Now, the next order of business—people like us tend to attract adventure, Dudley. You are 13 and have faced You-Know-Who twice. So, if you ever find yourself in a fix—don't hesitate to send an owl. I will be glad to offer my help and my advice to my yougn protege.

Regards

Your friend

Gilderoy Lockhart, (Order of Merline 3rd Class, Order of Merlin 2nd Class, Honorary Member of the Dark Force Defence League and Six-Time Winner of Witch Weekly's Most Charming Smile)