Quidditch practice took place on that Saturday. Dudley on his Nimbus 2000 had tried out for beater again, but once more had been outflown by the Weasley twins.
"Hard luck, Dud," Ron had said afterwards. He had easily made the team as seeker, flying better than he had last year. He told Dudley and Dean afterwards that he had spent a lot of the summer practicing with the twins and Ginny.
Both Ginny and Dean had tried out for chasers but hadn't made the team—Angelina Johnson, Alicia Spinnett and Katie Bell were three of the school's top flyers. Dudley thought Ginny looked like a good player, but she was on Ron's old Shooting Star which he had given her since he was now using a Comet 260 of Charlies.
Defence Against the Dark Arts and Care of Magical Creatures soon became Dudley's best two subjects. In their next Care of Magical Creatures lesson, Hagrid introduced them to Abraxan Horses which were essentially horses with wings. Parvati and Lavender had "Ooohed" with delight at them and even Pansy Parkinson and Daphne Greengrass looked impressed.
"A friend o' mine breeds 'em. Very smart they are-but difficult ter train. Strong but stubborn." He had said.
Hagrid had them prepare a diet of mixed vegetables and then, while the horses feasted, he had them grooming their coats and cleaning their hooves. Dudley didn't think they were as interesting as the hippogriffs (a lack of fangs and talons) but they were cool animals.
While Hagrid was busy showing Pansy and Daphne how to hold the hoof pick, Dudley gave Neville a nudge.
"A chocolate frog if you throw some dung at Malfoy," he urged.
"No way," Neville said with a worried glance at Hagrid and then at Malfoy.
"Go on," Dudley urged. "Malfoy wouldn't dare do anything. And remember how he pushed you around in your first year?"
Neville still looked hesitant. He looked around quickly. Hermione was focused on writing notes about the horses in a nook and not paying attention.
"Ok, but quickly …" he scooped up handful of the grassy Abraxan horse dung and hurled it at Malfoy.
Dudley, Ron and Dean let out a bark of laughter as it hit the back of his head, shattering into pieces and showering Crabbe and Goyle with crumbled bits of grassy dung.
Malfoy glared in their direction. Dudley gave him the finger.
"Nice on," Ron said, approvingly.
Neville still looked uncertain, but gave a weak smile.
"Don't let him push you around anymore," Dudley said, handing over a chocolate frog.
"Not much chance of that," Dean said. "He doesn't push anyone around. The whole school hates him."
This wasn't entirely true. The Slytherins hadn't turned on him yet and tensions between Slytherins and the other houses were quickly escalating as they tried to defend Malfoy from being targeted. Flint of the Slytherin quidditch team had been given a detention for hexing Cormac McClaggen in retaliation for him attaching a "hex me" sign on Malfoy's back with a sticky charm.
Dudley was enjoying Professor Lupin's classes a lot too. His next few lessons were just as interesting as the first. After Boggarts, they studied Red Caps, nasty little goblin-like creatures that lurked wherever there had been bloodshed: in the dungeons of castles and the potholes of deserted battlefields, waiting to bludgeon those who had gotten lost. From Red Caps they moved on to Kappas, creepy. water-dwellers that looked like scaly monkeys, with webbed hands itching to strangle unwitting waders in their ponds.
While the students at Hogwarts had stopped asking Dudley, Ron and Dean about the adventures that they had had last year, they were still very much considered to be the cool kids. Even older students from other houses gave them a nod of recognition in the corridors and a few of the girls from their year tended to giggle when they passed the three.
Luna, of course, said a cheerful hello whenever they encountered each other. She still hung around with Ginny a lot and could still often be found in the Gryffindor common room studying with her friend. She had started giving Dudley a copy of The Quibbler each week.
Hermione had scoffed at the magazine, calling it "rubbish for idiots" but Dudley and Ron found some of the articles amusing. He had particularly liked one about how Lucius Malfoy was now living on the streets of Manchester disguised as a beggar named Bill and one about how Professor Snape's hair was so greasy because of an experimental hair-curling charm gone wrong.
On the downside, Potions was still a nightmare. Snape was in a particularly vindictive mood these days, and no one was in any doubt why. The story of the Boggart assuming Snape's shape, and the way that Neville had dressed it in his grandmother's clothes, had traveled through the school like wildfire. Snape didn't seem to find it funny. His eyes flashed menacingly at the very mention of Professor Lupin's name, and he was bullying Neville worse than ever.
Dudley was also growing to hate the hours he spent in Professor Trelawney's stifling tower room, deciphering lopsided shapes and symbols, trying to ignore the way Professor Trelawney's enormous eyes filled with tears every time she looked at him. He couldn't like Professor Trelawney, even though she was treated with respect bordering on reverence by some of the class. Parvati Patil and Lavender Brown had taken to haunting Professor Trelawney's tower room at lunch times, and always returned with annoyingly superior looks on their faces, as though they knew things the others didn't. They had also started using hushed voices whenever they spoke to Dudley, as though he were on his deathbed.
"It's all stuff and nonsense," Dudley said, to Hermione's agreement. Ron looked skeptical however but didn't argue the point.
Oliver Wood had started the team training three evenings a week. He had gone to watch on a few occasions, but usually stayed in the common room or library with Dean, Neville and Hermione—either doing their homework or playing games.
One evening, there came a stir when Percy the Prefect pinned up a notice on the wall.
"Cool, first Hogsmeade weekend," Dean announced. He had gotten up to read it while Dudley and Neville played wizard chest.
"Cool, I want to visit Honeydukes," Neville said, looking up.
Dudley took the opportunity to switch his knight and his pawn, so he could then take Neville's bishop. Hermione tutted and rolled her eyes at Dudley's cheating.
A few minutes later, Ron and the rest of the team came in.
"First Hogsmeade weekend," Dudley said, nodding towards the poster.
"Excellent," said Fred, who had followed Ron through the portrait hole. "I need to visit Zonko's. I'm nearly out of Stink Pellets."
"Do you think the dementors will be there?" Neville asked anxiously.
"Nah," George said. "The shopkeepers would go loopy. There'd be no quicker way to drive away business."
Dudley wouldn't admit it, but he felt relieved at that news. He didn't like Dementors at all. He gave a small shudder, remembering how they had made him start hearing and seeing the basilisk which had nearly killed them last year.
"Oh yeah, I better write and let Lockhart know," he said, suddenly remembering.
"You're still going to have lessons with that prat?"
"Ron, he's not a prat," Hermione said, scandalized. "Ok, he wasn't a great teacher—but he saved Dudley's life remember."
"And remember Mr. Malfoy?" Dean said.
Fred and George were looking curious.
"Oh, he erm, ticked Malfoy off last year—after he threatened Dudley," Dean said, improvising quickly. The twins weren't aware that Gilderoy Lockhart had cast a memory charm on Lucius Malfoy to stop him from remembering that Dudley had taken his wand from him and snapped it—an offence which would likely have gotten Dudley expelled from Hogwarts.
Despite Lockhart being a poor teacher and, in Ron's words, a bit of a prat, Dudley felt he would always be grateful to him.
Hermione opened her mouth to say more, but at that moment Crookshanks leapt lightly onto her lap. A large, dead spider was dangling from his mouth.
"Does he have to eat that in front of us?" said Ron, scowling.
"Clever Crookshanks, did you catch that all by yourself?" said Hermione.
Crookshanks; slowly chewed up the spider, his yellow eyes fixed insolently on Ron.
"Just keep him over there, that's all," said Ron irritably, turning back to his star chart. "I've got Scabbers asleep in my bag."
Dudley yawned. He really wanted to go to bed, but he still had his own star chart to complete. He pulled his bag toward him, took out parchment, ink, and quill, and started work.
"You can copy mine, if you like," said Ron, labeling his last star with a flourish and shoving the chart toward Dudley.
Hermione, who disapproved of copying, pursed her lips but didn't say anything. Crookshanks was still staring unblinkingly at Ron, flicking the end of his bushy tail. Then, without warning, he pounced.
"OY!" Ron roared, seizing his bag as Crookshanks sank four sets of claws deep inside it and began tearing ferociously. "GET OFF, YOU STUPID ANIMAL!"
Ron tried to pull the bag away from Crookshanks, but Crookshanks clung on, spitting and slashing.
"Ron, don't hurt him!" squealed Hermione; the whole common room was watching; Ron whirled the bag around, Crookshanks still clinging to it, and Scabbers came flying out of the top -
"CATCH THAT CAT!" Ron yelled as Crookshanks freed himself from the remnants of the bag, sprang over the table, and chased after the terrified Scabbers.
George Weasley made a lunge for Crookshanks but missed; Scabbers streaked through twenty pairs of legs and shot beneath an old chest of drawers. Crookshanks skidded to a halt, crouched low on his bandy legs, and started making furious swipes beneath it with his front paw.
Ron and Hermione hurried over; Hermione grabbed Crookshanks around the middle and heaved him away; Ron threw himself onto his stomach and, with great difficulty, pulled Scabbers out by the tail.
"Look at him!" he said furiously to Hermione, dangling Scabbers in front of her. "He's skin and bone! You keep that cat away from him!"
"Crookshanks doesn't understand it's wrong!" said Hermione, her voice shaking. "All cats chase rats, Ron!"
"There's something funny about that animal!" said Ron, who was trying to persuade a frantically wiggling Scabbers back into his pocket. "It heard me say that Scabbers was in my bag!"
"Oh, what rubbish," said Hermione impatiently. "Crookshanks could smell him, Ron, how else do you think -"
"That cat's got it in for Scabbers!" said Ron, ignoring the people around him, who were starting to giggle. "And Scabbers was here first, and he's ill!"
Ron marched through the common room and out of sight up the stairs to the boys' dormitories.