Chapter 3: Whisker to Whisper (Part 1)

The pride, with varying levels of eagerness, marched toward the dark walls of the College of Whispers, now visible over the hill they climbed. Khinashi's attempts at trying to convince the rest how exciting this is has been met with firm resistance in the form of complete and utter silence. Khinashi eventually gave up and kept the enthusiasm to herself.

J'shabi was in the lead, and stopped for a moment and looked around, before approaching a cluster of trees just before the descent from the hilltop.

"Alright, we're close enough, this seems like a good spot to-"

Ma'krin shakes off the luggage he was carrying and drops to the ground to rest against a tree.

"-set up camp...Right, Ma'krin."

Everyone followed Ma'krin's example and dropped their backpacks to the ground. The ones with thumbs began pitching tents, while the others unbundled the firewood and carved out a place for their cooking fire within the forest to avoid attracting undue attention. The process became systematic for everyone, a daily procedure as they made their way through Cyrodiil. Khinashi caught J'shabi looking to the sky in the east where dark clouds were forming, licking her finger to be able to tell the direction of the wind. Khinashi was about to say that was what whiskers were for, but decided against it.

"It looks like it'll reach here by midday." J'shabi said, sensing Khinashi's presence.

"Is that so important? The rain here has been but sprinkles compared to what we are used to in Torval."

"Not really, but it means Jizad and Jahirr will have to do their hunting earlier," J'shabi said.

She was right, Khinashi thought, Jahirr would not be able to track well in the rain, and the wildlife probably would not be out in the open with it pouring down anyway.

A thought occurred to Khinashi as a way of using this as another excuse to suggest staying at the college.

"You know, if this one were to ask, the mages at the College of Whispers could let us stay there while we help them – we would not have to do any hunting then. Even Jahirr and the twins might be allowed!"

J'shabi looked at Khinashi sternly, it was apparent she did not approve of Khinashi using J'shabi's sensibilities to persuade her of something she had already denied several times before.

"No, we can't risk that. We can't even let them know they're here, we don't know what they'd do if they knew two Senche and a Pahmar-raht were camped outside their walls."

"Probably nothing, J'shabi. Mages are often more open-minded, they get more than their fair share of discrimination already, remember."

"'Probably' isn't worth the risk if we're wrong. We aren't staying there very long anyway, just enough to talk to them and leave, once you find out what you wanted to know."

J'shabi started trekking down the hill. Khinashi looked back to the rest, who did not seem to protest at the idea of them leaving, and joined her.

"So you are coming to the college with Khinashi then? This one is surprised."

"I couldn't let you just walk into a place full of mages with spells that could incinerate you by yourself, could I?"

"That almost sounds like what you said when we went to the Dark Brotherhood for help."

"Which was just about as crazy, too."

Khinashi laughed, but it still stung that J'shabi held mages with such suspicion. She hoped J'shabi was wrong, that the others would be allowed in, that they would stay for longer, maybe allowing Khinashi a chance to learn some magic whilst they research the disappearance of the moons. Maybe it would be a chance to prove to J'shabi and the others that mages aren't inherently bad, either. Maybe.

Khinashi looked upon the dark stone walls of the college ahead of them. The college was shaped like a diamond, with thick corridors three-stories high between the diamond's four points, at which thicker spiral towers were placed. The center of the diamond was a large spiral roof, most likely above the lobby at which the largest meetings and lunch was held. It would be inside the lobby that another ruin of an Oblivion gate stands, and where whispers from denizens of Oblivion can be heard throughout the college at certain times - hence its name, the College of Whispers.

Khinashi had read that the college was formed by a group of ex-mage guild members when the guild was abolished after the Oblivion Crisis – they had come to research this particular Oblivion gate, for it was one of the few not shut down until the Oblivion crisis ended worldwide. They had managed to tap into residual energies the gate left behind, and used them to travel to various planes of Oblivion, where our knowledge of the planes were greatly expanded.

Trips to Oblivion provided many useful things, such as plants only found in certain planes of Oblivion that could cure various diseases that were otherwise difficult, or make interesting and powerful new potions. Materials from Oblivion proved useful to blacksmiths, architects and craftsman alike, and were certainly welcome in rebuilding from the destruction caused by the Oblivion crisis itself. Weaknesses to exploit against the Daedra and new ways to defend against them were also discovered, much to the delight of the recently crowned emperor at the time.

The mages grew in fame from their exploits and the college was built around the site of the Oblivion gate where most of their experiments were performed. Unfortunately, when they were officially sanctioned as a magical institution, and their experiments with Oblivion became more dangerous, politics invaded the college. Organizations such as the Vigilants of Stendarr, whom openly opposed the mage's use of the Oblivion gate, and the Synod – a rival magical institution rebuilt over the Arcane University in the Imperial City – convinced the Elder Council to restrict the College of Whispers from tampering with Oblivion, and so what made the College of Whispers so famous to begin with, became just another of the forbidden arts. Yet the whispers from Oblivion itself can still be heard to this day throughout the college.

And Khinashi cannot wait to hear them.

"So there it is, then." Smallpaws signed to Ma'ketra. He wasn't sure if he should be happy or sad to look upon the walls that killed his best friend. Regardless, he would endeavor to learn what happened to him, if he could at least remember that, it would be enough.

"Still so gloomy, Snorepaws? Ma'ketra would have thought you would be happier now that you can learn what happened to your friend."

"How can I be? Being here just brings back memories – or rather, the lack of them...Sorry – you're right, I should be happy. Thanks again for making this possible."

"You are beginning to make little sense again Snorepaws."

Smallpaws walked over to Jahirr, who was preparing for his hunt with Jizad. He mewed to grab his attention so he could sign to him.

"Jahirr, I've got to go check something out, could you write to Jizad explaining that I'm just exploring nearby in case he asks where I've gone?"

"This one is not your servant. If you have something to say to Jizad then write it to him yourself."

"Well, that's not going to happen. I just thought it'd be courteous to let someone know before I run off this time."

"Then you will be going nowhere, little one. This one will not let you leave without telling him."

"Oh? How are you going to do that if you're supposed to be hunting with him soon? Besides, he won't notice I'm gone, I'll probably be back before you are anyway...And if you think I'm going to tag along on that hunt of yours so you can stop me, I'll scare any animal you try to track away. No, I'll be leaving."

Jahirr growled angrily, but Smallpaws could tell Jahirr knew he was serious. He had done that a few days ago as a prank, which made them take an hour longer.

"Do not go far." Jahirr said, beaten.

Smallpaws rolled his eyes and trotted toward the hill slope. Ma'ketra growled and chased after him.

"Snorepaws, this one will come with you. It would not be wise for you to go alone, there are many predators who would see one of your size as easy pickings."

"I've traveled across Tamriel on my own, Ma'ketra, I'll be fine climbing down a hill and walking around a college by myself, thanks..."

"Fine, but let this one join you anyway. It would be much more fun than staying here at camp with Ma'krin."

"I'm just looking for something, it won't be any adventure this time, but you can come along if you really want to, I guess."

Ma'ketra walked alongside of Smallpaws, and as they left, he waited for the inevitable question. Smallpaws could have snuck out unseen, but Ma'ketra was too conspicuous.

"Where are you going?" Jizad asks, standing up from the fire he had finally created. Smallpaws was more than a little irritated that the walkers always felt the need to check up on them if they wanted to go explore, but if any of them leave without saying anything it's fine...

Even more irritating was when they asked questions they knew they wouldn't understand the answer to in their sign language.

"To Masser and Secunda of course, where else?" Smallpaws signed, for he knew whatever he signed would be irrelevant anyway. The dumb look on his face confirmed he didn't know what he said, and so Smallpaws turned around and continued walking.

"Do not sign it, just write out," Jizad said, collecting some material from one of their sacks of luggage and bring it over to him.

"It is not safe for Ma'ketra to be near the college if that is where you are going, it would be too easy for someone to see you." He pressed on. Smallpaws was angered by the suggestion and hissed at him, and then used telekinesis to lift one of the supplies of water they had onto the fire Jizad had only just finished creating.

Jizad sighed and gave up, while Jahirr gave Smallpaws a disappointed shake of his head.

Ma'ketra walked in front of Smallpaws as they continued their descent.

"That was rude of you, Snorepaws."

"If the walkers don't want to bother learning our sign language then I don't have to bother answering to them."

"What is it with you and your refusal to write anything? It needlessly complicates things, and is getting quite annoying, to be honest."

"Maybe it does, maybe it is, but there's a reason for it, and maybe I'll tell you. But not now, first I want to check the memorial around the college. I want to see if he's there."

Khinashi and J'shabi walked up to the metal door, almost several times their size. The carvings on it were intricate and illustrated the various schools of magic, as well as other symbols known to the magical world. Khinashi noticed Mysticism was not among them, which meant they must have remade the door sometime after the college's initial construction.

"What is it with people wanting to build these huge doors all the time? Why can't they just be simple, small doors about the size of the people intended to use them?" J'shabi asks.

"Maybe they were built this way in case a Senche-raht wanted to visit them." Khinashi responded sarcastically.

"How thoughtful of them, then." J'shabi responded with her own joking tone.

J'shabi did not respond, instead she pushed open the door with more effort than was necessary, and the doors swung open freely until they bounced off of the wall.

The sight before Khinashi's eyes brought her in awe of the place, it was the lobby – everything seemed to give off a blue tint, as if the walls themselves radiated magicka. Blue flame torches dotted the walls throughout the circular structure, with large, thin windows inbetween every other one of them. Large tables were set against the wall, beneath the windows – for the student's lunch, Khinashi guessed. Bookcases and displays and notices tacked onto walls filled the empty spaces inbetween. In the center the lobby descended into a large circular ring, and within the middle of that ring stood another layer of bricks circling the remnants of the Oblivion gate, much like the one she saw in Kvatch, except there was an indention for an orb to be placed.

Khinashi figured that might be the sigil stones that held together the pocket planes of Oblivion they came from. The fact it was not there could be for many a reason – one being that they aren't allowed to use the Oblivion gate for experiments anymore being the most likely.

Khinashi walked forward, to the inner ring, and noticed that the lobby extended above, along the northern wall there was a set of stairs that led to the upper floor, which seemed to be where more tables and furniture was placed, branching out into hallways much like the lobby below. Khinashi turned around and saw that the stair went up even further, all the way up to the spiral rooftop where the headmaster's room must be.

"So...where is everyone?" J'shabi asked at last, breaking Khinashi's observation.

She realized it was a good question though, throughout the entire lobby, Khinashi could not see or hear anyone, and the walls of the building indicated that if there were anyone to hear, her Khajiit ears would pick up echoes at the very least.

"Khinashi does not know...Hello? Is anyone here?" As expected, Khinashi's voice echoed through the lobby – through the halls, but she could not so much as hear footsteps in response.

"Maybe they're out somewhere? Or maybe it's not a time of year they study?"

Khinashi snorted at J'shabi's guesses. "This place looks as if it could house hundreds of people, J'shabi, there surely must be at least someone here regardless of the time of year – we heard they were doing research on the Moons in the first place, there would have to be people here to do that research, no?"

"I guess so, but...Where are they then?" J'shabi asked again, as if the answer could be any different.

Khinashi heard the sound of a door swinging open from the top of of the spiral staircase, and heard footsteps from at least two people, stumbling and running down.

"I know I heard someone, we need to get out of here now!" A young human, female voice said.

"You could try to be a little quieter, you know, and not make every step sound like an earthquake." This voice sounded more elven, and definitely male.

Khinashi grabbed J'shabi and ducked behind a plant as the two above kept running down the stairs. They met the top balcony and ran off down one of the hallways.

Khinashi considered what to do and after a couple seconds, darted out from the plant pot and to the stairs to reach the upper level. J'shabi ran after her.

"Khinashi, I don't think those people want to be found." She whispered.

"They are the only ones we have seen so far, we might as well ask them where everyone else is."

J'shabi must have realized the futility in debating and just tried to keep up with Khinashi.

When they reached the top of the stairs, Khinashi looked down the hall just in time to see them close a door behind them, on the side. She pressed on to follow them.

The hallway was rather boringly decorative compared to the lobby – the walls had maps and more notices, with the occasional plant, but otherwise was rather dull. The amount of doors branching off from each side suggested this was the personal rooms of the students. Khinashi was surprised that they had so many, and figured it must be very expensive to become a member of the college.

She reached the door that the two went through, and gave a signal to J'shabi to stay back a bit. Khinashi dropped to a crouch and snuck silently close to the door.

"So where are we going to put it?" The female voice spoke – Khinashi could tell the accent better now, and it seemed Nordish like Tolgun, except with a lot of Cyrodiil in it. A Nord raised in Cyrodiil, perhaps.

"I still don't see why you thought to stash it in my room, it was your idea after all, I don't want to be held responsible for this if it's found."

"Yours was closer, and besides, you're the one who'll be able to use the notes. I don't know anything about sigil stones, remember?"

"Whatever, just...stash it in bed for now, we'll figure out what to do with it later."

"We're going to be in trouble aren't we? I know I heard someone, it could have been the headmaster, if it was..."

"If we do manage to finish his research for him, he'll be thankful we did this. He might even reward us."

"I can't imagine Ceryeas being thankful for anything..."

"Quit your complaining and just act natural, we'll come back to work on it when we find out who you heard."

Khinashi leaped away from the door and then several steps backward near J'shabi before the door opened, pretending she had just been walking down the hall when it did.

The Dunmer walked out, followed by the Nord, who jumped from shock when she saw the two Khajiit.

The Nord was about to say something, but she was cut off by the Dunmer raising his hand to her and stepping forward. He quickly scanned over the two Khajiit, if he had any hint of surprise, fear or confusion upon seeing them, he hid it well.

"You're clearly not students here and you don't look old enough to join. You're wandering about the upper halls of the college and you haven't started running away upon being spotted. Curious. Do you actually have a reason for being in this highly suspicious situation or should I summon security to have you removed for trespassing?" The Dunmer spoke plainly, almost boringly.

"'Summon' security?" J'shabi said under her breath.

Khinashi responded without hesitation.

"We learned your college is looking into the cause for the disappearance of the moons – the Void Nights anomaly – and wish to help you, we have information about it that could prove useful."

"Ooh, the Void Nights? I've wanted to know about that too!" The Nord exclaimed.

"The college doesn't accept outside help, at least not from just any cat-child who wanders in here, I trust you understand. Now if you'll please turn around and leave, this will be easier for all of us." The Dunmer spoke over the Nord.

"Alright, sorry to have bothered you." J'shabi said, and turned around, waiting for Khinashi to follow.

Khinashi did not move, and crossed her arms. She did not like the Dunmer thinking of them as little children – the Dunmer looked to be only just entering adulthood, and the Nord could not be more than a year or two older than J'shabi. They wore robes not too unlike those of Khinashi's that her father gave her, except with less layers, and the length led down to their feet all around them. The designs were much different, too, but had an air of plainness about them. These were clearly robes for students, not teachers or higher ranking members of a magical institution.

The Dunmer boasted the dark red eyes and grey ashen skin their race is known for, with sleek, short black hair that was taller in the front. He had no facial hair to speak of, and had a gaunt face with a a long chin and nose, and an expression of disapproval that looked to be permanently etched into him, even if he were to smile.

The Nord looked tall, even for Nord standards, which was almost a head taller than the Dunmer despite him looking older, and which was about half the height taller than Khinashi and J'shabi. She had long brown hair which hung unrestrained around her, with her eyes of the same colour. Her nose seemed big for a human, and it had a bulging tip, while her face was more curved and round than she would have expected a Nord to normally be. Perhaps she was of mixed descent. It was hard for Khinashi to tell with humans.

"You are just a student here, yes?" Khinashi says, ending her observation. "Khajiit does not think it is your place to decide. Let us speak to the one leading that project, and see what they think."

The Dunmer's expression instantly turned angry.

"I am a third-year adept in the art of Conjuration. I can judge if it's worth my colleague's time to consider help from two trespassing children. Now begone."

"Hmm, who was it that was leading it? I forgot who won the vote for it...Was it Perien, or did Arivanya win again?" The Nord spoke aloud to herself.

The Dunmer lifted his hands, to reveal a floating purple orb in each, as he began channeling a conjuration spell.

"Okay, we're sorry - we'll leave! Let's go!" J'shabi tugged on Khinashi's shoulder to leave, but Khinashi still stood firm. J'shabi tugged harder, but she would not move.

"Very well, then Khajiit will be sure to inform another member of the college about why the headmaster's notes on sigil stones are missing. How does the College of Whispers deal with thieves amongst its numbers, this one wonders?"

The Dunmer's arms dropped to his side, and the Nord's mouth gaped open with fear.

"How do you know about..." The Dunmer said in a demanding tone. "Fine. I see where this is going, but it doesn't matter anyway. Yes, you heard correctly that the College of Whispers was researching the Void Nights Anomaly, but it is no longer a concern of ours. That project was canceled a few days ago."

"You gave up?" Khinashi asked.

"No, we did not 'give up', it simply became less of a priority. When the initial scare was over and life seemed to be going on as normal, the headmaster returned us to other avenues of a little more significance to us and the empire."

"So you gave up..." Khinashi said disappointedly, lowering her head. J'shabi stepped toward the Dunmer.

"Did you learn anything about it while you were researching it?" J'shabi asked, much to Khinashi's surprise.

The Dunmer sighed. "I wasn't assigned to that project so I wouldn't know, but I heard they didn't make any breakthroughs. It was mostly testing theories they came up with to see how it might be possible, but, judging by how absurd some of their theories were I...doubt their tests procured anything of use."

"Well, we'd like to learn what they found out anyway." J'shabi insisted. Khinashi wondered what J'shabi's reasons for pressing further were, when she was only moments ago wanting to leave.

"Very well, I suppose, it's not my time you'll be wasting. You'll no-doubt have noticed by now that there aren't many Mages present at the College of Whispers right now though, and we don't take kindly to visitors at any time unless they have better reasons to be here, so-"

"Where is everyone anyway?" Khinashi asked, interrupting him.

The Nord blurted out her response. "Most of the college is out investigating an Ayleid ruin that was recently uncovered beneath a rockslide! It's one of the few that haven't been raided by adventurer's, and we think we could learn a lot about Ayleid culture and history from within!"

"And their magic." The Dunmer added.

"And so the whole college is at the Ayleid ruin?" Khinashi asked incredulously.

"Well, not everyone was allowed to go..." The Nord said shamefully, and the Dunmer looked off to the side. "Since they'll be there for a couple weeks, most who weren't allowed to go decided to go home to spend the time with their families, and others made their own plans, since no classes will be held until they get back anyway. The Groundskeeper Wilxton is here, and the Conjuration professor Merellis stayed behind to look after those who stayed here, but he's...Weird. Oh, and the headmaster I guess. And us, and a few other students, but I don't know where they are."

"Probably off getting drunk in Skingrad knowing them." The Dunmer clarified. "They're so...lower class, it's a shame on the College's good name that they were even accepted."

"So who would we speak to to learn about the Void Nights?" J'shabi asked, bringing the conversation back to relevance.

"The only one still here that would know anything about the project would be Headmaster Ceryeas himself, and I honestly doubt he'll have the time nor the care to answer questions from wandering children. No doubt you'll disregard that logic and ask him anyway. Who knows, maybe he's in a good mood."

"This one does not think he will be very happy when he realizes his research is missing," Khinashi noted.

"Where can we find him?" J'shabi asks.

"He should be returning soon from his walk around the college grounds. It might make a better first impression if you weren't trespassing when meeting him...Actually, that reminds me – you're quite lucky you chose the time you did to wander in here, I had to banish the atronach patrols temporarily while we performed our little heist. You would have likely been ripped apart or incinerated without warning had it been any other time. I'll have to summon them again before Ceryeas returns, during which time you won't want to be inside."

"I'll go with them then while you do that, to help introduce them to Ceryeas and...not be here when you summon them, just in case?" The Nord spoke with a tremor of fear and paranoia.

"Your fears are predictably irrational and unwarranted, but expected and typical from a first-year. Very well."

'Jasper Frey

4E 78 – 4E 96

A kind-hearted Breton boy, full of energy and spirit, with an inborn ability to channel the essence of magicka limitlessly, which ultimately led to his death in the Incident of 4E 96.'

Smallpaws read and re-read the inscription on the memorial plaque. He sighed and turned around, to see Ma'ketra looking toward him from the distance, with a sorrow in her eyes.

"So he is there?" Ma'ketra signed.

"Yeah...I mean no, he's not buried here, he's probably somewhere in High Rock. I thought the memorial would have more than just a single line. Just one more name etched into the memorial now, with only a single line to describe him...Only a single line written to remember him by." Smallpaws sighed again and dropped to the ground from an overwhelming sense of exhaustion.

"This one is sorry for your loss."

Smallpaws didn't respond, and instead just tried to distract his thoughts. His stomach hurt from grief, and felt hollow inside, his eyelids weighed tons and wanted to close shut, but he kept them open – because in the darkness there is only thought - thoughts he wanted to keep away from. He tried to focus on different things to evade them, but his eyes could never stay in one place. Even when he was getting dizzy he refused to let the thoughts into his mind, until eventually his head hurt from the strain and was forced to close them.

Ma'ketra growled for his attention, and he remembered she was there. He didn't want to think about it anymore.

"Snorepaws? Is something wrong?"

"So what now? Maybe we could go back to camp and play a trick on your brother. That's always fun, right? Or maybe Jahirr, he's gotten off easy for too long, it's about time that changed."

"What?" Ma'ketra signed. She looked utterly confused. Smallpaws stood up and began walking away, only turning around after a few seconds to see that Ma'ketra hadn't moved.

"Come on, what are you waiting for? The others might be back, maybe they learned about the Void Nights, maybe we'll be going somewhere else now."

"But what about-" Was all that Smallpaws saw Ma'ketra sign, before he turned his head away and continued walking.

Ma'ketra ran around in front of him.

"What has gotten into you, Snorepaws? Why are you acting so strange?" Ma'ketra signed with annoyance now.

"Oh, thanks for reminding me, you can take us back." Smallpaws leaped on top of Ma'ketra and climbed to his usual resting spot. Ma'ketra clearly didn't approve of this and tried to shake him off. Smallpaws dug his claws into the cloth around her neck to hang on, which prompted her to roll on her back, forcing Smallpaws to jump off before being crushed by the Senche.

"Fine, I'll just walk then."

Before Smallpaws could make any distance, Ma'ketra lifted him up by a tug of her claw on his Portneu shawl, and pinned him to a branch on a nearby tree.

"Ma'ketra will not let you down until you explain what is going on with you. Why do you suddenly want to leave? Was this not what you wanted – to learn what happened to your friend?"

"Well yeah, it was at first. Now though, maybe it would be best I didn't know, that's not the best thing to remember someone by is it? How they died?"

Ma'ketra eyed him suspiciously.

"What made you change your mind?"

"Well, I just thought that, well, seeing his memorial, might remind me of something, and well, it didn't. It just made me realize something, and because of that I'd feel better if I was far away from here until I forget."

"And what is it that, then?"

Smallpaws tugged at the branch for a few seconds, seeing if he could get down himself and avoid explaining. After enough failed attempts, Ma'ketra lifted him up from the branch and back on the ground, but gave a look that said without signing, that if he tried to run he'd go right back up there.

"Alright, I'll tell you, it might be easier to start from the beginning though." Smallpaws signed. Ma'ketra didn't interrupt him, and so he continued.

"What do you know about Alfiq?"

"What about Alfiq? Aside from that you are one? That this one's parents were Alfiq, Jo'banja an Alfiq-raht? You are small and good with magic. What more is there to say? And what does this have to do with anything?"

"Is there anything else that sticks out about us as peculiar?"

Ma'ketra thought for a few moments, and then shrugged.

"Alfiq...Hmm, your kind tends not to be good at multi-tasking, and can be forgetful at times, or so this one has heard. Is there something else?"

"Have you ever seen an Alfiq mention they'll write something down in 'their book', or that 'this will be going in the book'?"

"Well, yes, this one's Alfiq father is a journalist, so he tends to write a lot of course for the newspaper. Hmm, then again, now that you mention it, Mother has mentioned writing before too, and Jo'banja always keeps a journal near her that she does not like others reading. You are the only Alfiq this one knows that does not like writing. Why is that?"

"I'm surprised you haven't figured it out. You've never heard of a krozijkajabo before? I guess it's not something Alfiq like to bring up around others, but it's sacred for every Alfiq."

"Krozijkajabo? Thought-book?"

"Yeah. Alfiq are more than just 'forgetful', we lose our memory over time. It's our brains – they're built differently, more compact, so that we can still think as fast as others, even though they're not as big, but what comes with that means we don't remember as much as others. Our memories fade away over time to be replaced with new ones, and when they're gone - they're gone. It's like...waking up, but not knowing you were asleep before."

Smallpaws stopped, thinking of how to explain the rest. Ma'ketra looked on with full attention, she seemed surprised, and Smallpaws was just as much so, he would have thought Ma'ketra would know all of this already.

"There's a saying, 'A Senche will remember the face of a stranger as well as their own reflection, but an Alfiq will forget their own Mother before the year is over.' It's an exaggeration, it's not that bad, but it varies from Alfiq to Alfiq. Or so I've read. To combat our fading memory, every Alfiq is given a Krozijkajabo at birth, a thought-book. It's like a journal, but it's the most important possession any Alfiq will ever have throughout their whole life. It's where they write everything that's most important to them – or anything they just want to remember. Names and descriptions of people, what they mean to them. Events, accomplishments, everything. In a few years when they read that book, they won't even remember writing the earlier sections. The Krozijkajabo is our sole means of remembering their past, our entire life's story. Upon death, a family member or friend will write the final page in their book and give it to the Clan Mother of their hometown – or whomever gave them it in the first place. The same is done for the first few pages of the book when they're born, until they learn to write themselves."

"This one feels ignorant, and terrible, for not knowing any of this-wait...then where is yours?"

"In the same place it has been since I was given it – about a year ago. Somewhere in the House of Cats in Torval. I've never touched it."

"But...What? What do you do to record your memories, then?"

"I don't."

"Then how do you remember your past?"

"I...don't. That's the point. I don't remember – not much, anyway. You have to realize, I wasn't born in Elsweyr, I never knew my parents, I never knew I was an Alfiq, a Khajiit, until much later. Or at least, I must not have, I can't even say that much for certain. I never knew about the Krozijkajabo until...Until it was too late."

"Too late?"

"You want to know why I hate writing? Why I refuse whenever I'm asked? If I failed to remember what was most important to me, then nothing is worth remembering. I never knew to write in a thought-book until it was too late, and so I won't write at all."

There was a long lapse of signing between them for the next several seconds. Smallpaws didn't feel any better for sharing that truth with someone. He remembers all of his time in Torval, and his exploration across Tamriel, and maybe a year back in Wayrest, but his memory of his old friend is fading, and can only remember the barest details, never any specifics. He knows that he taught him to read and write, and helped him discover that he was a Khajiit. He remembers what his friend told him about the past beyond that, but not from his own memory, and which isn't much. Not enough.

"Nothing is worth remembering?" Ma'ketra asked.

Smallpaws felt guilty then, that was one of the reasons he wanted to keep it a secret. There was no nice way to say it, but to him it was clear. It was all or nothing, and all wasn't an option. He realized it would be easiest just to ignore the question.

"I was hoping that maybe, coming here might...remind me of some things. Restore my memory, if just a little. It didn't, and it only made me regret it more."

"So you do not want to know what happened to your friend?"

"I do, but...I'm not sure if it's worth it. It'll just make me regret it more, it'll take longer for me to forget it entirely, when at least if I don't, then in a year or less, I'll have forgotten him entirely by then, and I won't be able to remember to regret it. If I stay and try to learn more, it will take a few more years, and I might not have learned anything. It's a risk."

"So in truth, you do not really want to remember at all, you just want to forget so you do not hurt as much."

"I never said that."

"It is clear that it is what you mean. It is not your memory you truly seek but a peace of mind, you only came here in hopes of remembering to ease your mind, but at the first sign of doubt, you want to run away and forget completely."

"You know, when you say it that way, it almost seems like you think I'm wrong in what I want."

"Ma'ketra says it as she sees it, and she sees a coward."

"That's funny, I'm pretty sure it was you who's jumped at their own shadow before."

"At least Ma'ketra only jumped, she did not run away with her tail between her legs like you!"

Smallpaws instinctively hissed and started circling around her, Ma'ketra roared back and did the same.

"Is someone there?" A voice called out. More importantly, a voice they did not recognize. Instantly Smallpaws and Ma'ketra forgot their quarrel and remembered that being spotted could prove fatal to them, especially so close to the college walls.

Smallpaws looked around for a place to hide – the voice was close, and so they didn't have much time. He'd be able to turn invisible, but he wasn't skilled enough to do so for Ma'ketra, and finding something big enough for her to hide behind would be difficult.

Ma'ketra tried ducking behind a gravestone but Smallpaws could see both sides of her from around it. He looked back and saw a shadow of someone walking toward the edge of the wall, soon to see them in seconds.

He turned back, and, to his surprise, saw Ma'ketra jumping up and pulling herself into an open window inside the college, but she wouldn't make it in time. He ran over to her and considered telekinesis for only a brief second, but it was clear it wouldn't be fast enough, if it would even work for this situation.

Instead, he withdrew his claws and plunged them into Ma'ketra's lower back. The two of them, with a yelp issued from Ma'ketra, flung into the college, and crashed into some manner of skeletal anatomy display, dispersing the hundreds of bones throughout the room.

"I know I heard something," the voice spoke again.

Smallpaws cast an invisibility spell and leapt up to the window sill while Ma'ketra crawled under a bed. He could see an elderly human, probably Breton, walking around in different directions with ice spells ready to be launched from his hands. He wore basic robes, but his age suggested he was probably a part of the faculty of the college, maybe a groundskeeper, and he wasn't going to stop until he found the source of the sound.

Smallpaws leapt down from the window sill inside the room and tucked himself out of his hood and shawl he always wore, and purposely dispelled his invisibility. Looking no different from an ordinary housecat now, he jumped back up and mewed innocently, licking his paws and drawing the mage's attention.

"Ah, it's just a cat." The Breton said with a chuckle. He lowered his spells and approached Smallpaws, and then lifted up his hand to pet him.

"Hey there little kitty, what are you doing up there?"

Before the hand could make contact, Smallpaws reached out and nipped his hand with his teeth, and then jumped down to the ground outside.

"Ow, hey!" the old man shouted after him.

Smallpaws ran behind a bush and turned back invisible. The groundskeeper looked behind it and then looked confused. He looked around more for where he went, but must have lost interest and gave up, and continued his patrol around the college.

Smallpaws ran back and jumped up back onto the window sill, with considerably more difficulty without a furry back to help climb up on most of the way. He dropped back into the room and saw Ma'ketra crawling out from under the bed.

"Did you really have to bite him?" Ma'ketra signed.

"Humans have no regard for the amount of time it takes to groom my fur just the way I like it. Petting it would just mess it all up."

Ma'ketra's response to this is to crawl out further and lick the top of Smallpaw's head, making the fur stick up and wildly.

"If you were anyone else, Ma'ketra, anyone else..." Smallpaws signs irritatingly.

Ma'ketra snorts a chuckle. "It looks nice on you. It makes you look more fierce."

"Oh, I'll show you fierce," Smallpaws playfully tackles Ma'ketra's legs, making Ma'ketra chuckle some more.

"Anyway, we should get out of here before someone finds us," Ma'ketra signed.

Smallpaws shook his head. "I think we'd be safer in here for awhile, that seemed like he was patrolling the College, so he'll probably be around for awhile. Besides, I think we'd learn more about what happened to Jasper in here than outside, don't you?"

Ma'ketra looked surprised at Smallpaw's change of heart once more, and smiled.

"Hmm, so your name is J'shabi, and you wear the garb of Elsweyr, and yet look elven in appearance-"

J'shabi's face turns into a sour frown.

"-so you must be an Ohmes Khajiit, right?" The Nord girl asks, circling around them as they walk through the college halls.

"Yeah, I am!" J'shabi says surprised, and the subtle annoyed look in her face faded away. Khinashi laughed at this.

"That is a good way to be on J'shabi's good side – by knowing her as a Khajiit, rather than a Bosmer. Even amongst our own, some have mistaken her before. That is impressive."

"I can see why, normally Ohmes paint their faces with patterns to look like more Khajiit right? Ohmes and Tojay are the only Khajiit 'furstocks' without fur."

"I didn't want any paint or tattoos. I don't like the look of it," J'shabi said.

"I can relate to that – other Nords sometimes like wearing warpaint all the time, but I think it looks silly."

"Nords often do not like magic, no?" Khinashi says.

"Not usually, I guess that's something we have in common then. Suthay are supposed to be the sneaky type, but judging by your robes, you're more interested in the arcane too, huh?"

Khinashi smiled again, and continued to be impressed with the Nord, and she could tell J'shabi was too.

"This is true. No one we have come across since we came to Cyrodiil have even mentioned our forms, nor seemed to know anything of our culture. Khinashi is curious, what else do you know of us?"

"I've read about how the phases of the moon choose how you look at birth, that you love Moon Sugar and sweets in general, and that you love keeping secrets. That's probably why most people don't know about you, and because only few of your forms ever venture outside of Elsweyr."

"It is complicated. You smooth-skins would not accept our four-legged brethren in your walls if they saw them. You would see them as animals and kill them, but they are as intelligent as anyone, they just cannot speak the spoken languages," Khinashi explained.

"Maybe you just need to introduce them better. We can't learn if you don't teach us, and if they never explore outside of Elsweyr, there's never going to be a chance for society to accept them," the Nord responded.

The Nord's words spoke exactly what Khinashi felt. She was tempted, so tempted, to tell her that might be possible, but J'shabi must have sensed Khinashi's intentions, for she gave a disapproving frown and shook her head.

"Sure, but you can't blame us if we don't want to risk our friend's or family's lives on the chance that they might be accepted, because if we tried that and we were wrong..." J'shabi said, leaving the rest unspoken.

"Hmm, yeah...you're right then, it is complicated," the Nord frowned.

There was a silence between them all for a few moments.

"Oh, I'm sorry, you told me both of yours, but I never told you my name. I'm Mulfendun, but most just call me 'Muffin' because they apparently fail at pronouncing Dovahzul. The Dunmer, my friend you met earlier, is Divyral."

"Dovahzul?" J'shabi asked. Khinashi did not know either.

"Yeah, it's a very old language, said to be used by the dragons themselves once, when there still were dragons anyway. Very few know it, but it's been a tradition for my father's side of the family to name their children in the language for as long as he can remember. Mine means 'Strong Will Grace'...I think the grace part was a mistake honestly."

"So you believe dragons existed then?" Khinashi asked.

"I think there's enough evidence to more than prove they have. I've never been to Skyrim myself, but there are supposedly burial mounds scattered throughout which contain the bones of ancient dragons. Some have been unearthed, and they certainly fit the picture."

"What do you think happened to them?"

"Who knows? Maybe they were all killed. Maybe they left. It's just one of the many mysteries of the world, like the disappearance of the Dwemer."

The group approached the front door to the college, and pushed open the large thing as the outside breeze coolly rushed in to greet them, which felt nice against Khinashi's fur. The clouds were settling in, but it would still be awhile until the rain arrived.

Khinashi looked over to the hills where their camp was settled, and desperately wanted to tell the Nord about them. If there were anyone in Cyrodiil who would accept them, she knew it would be her.

"So...You have never seen one of our four-legged forms before, then, 'Muffin'?" Khinashi inquired.

"No, not outside of books anyway, unless my pet cat back at home is an Alfiq, but I really doubt that. I'd love to if I ever had the chance. Maybe some day I'll travel to Elsweyr after I graduate. There's probably a lot they know about the world in ways that I would never have thought to ask."

"Perhaps you may not have to wait?" Khinashi subtly said.

"What do you mean?"

At this point J'shabi was repeatedly staring at Khinashi and tensing her face to silently tell her no, over and over. Muffin suddenly looked at J'shabi, who then stopped, and looked embarrassed.

"So when was the Headmaster supposed to get here again?" J'shabi asked, trying to change the subject.

"He shouldn't be much longer now, unless he went off and disappeared again."

"Disappeared?" J'shabi asked.

"Sometimes he just disappears for a few hours or more, I couldn't tell you where, he never says, not even to the instructors. He's a strange one at times."

"So we're just supposed to wait out here until then?" J'shabi asked.

This settled it for Khinashi.

"You seem trustworthy to this one. While we wait for your Headmaster to return, Khinashi feels you may like to meet some of our friends who have traveled here with us-"

"Khinashi, no, we can't-" J'shabi interjected.

"Yes we can J'shabi, and Muffin is right. If we do not make a point to introduce them, they will never be accepted outside of Elsweyr, and they will always have to hide."

"There are others with you?" Muffin asked.

"Yes. Come, this one will introduce you."