Final chapter! We're finally at the anticipated meeting and its a little dramatic but I was in the mood to indulge.

He asks to meet her on the roof of the Red Dragon syndicate. He doesn't think she'd take kindly to being caged in his office and going to the Bebop is not an option. He doesn't want it to feel like an invasion, not when she doesn't know who he is yet. Shin wanted to come with him but Spike threatened to shoot him himself if Shin tried such a thing. Spike knows Faye and he knows things can get bad if she feels cornered and vulnerable at the same time. The last thing he wants is someone messing things up even further.

She's facing away from the door as he walks out, hands on her hips even as she's turned away and her gun at her waist that he's sure is locked and loaded. Her hair is longer than he remembers it. She hates it long, he knows that. She hasn't been cutting it lately. He wonders why even though he already knows. Faye takes a lot of pride in her appearance and her slacking off in maintaining herself is the biggest sign he can get that he's royally fucked up. She doesn't look at him even as she hears his footsteps approach her until there's just six feet between them.

He doesn't know what to say.

He's the one who invited her here but he doesn't know what to say.

All night he'd tossed and turned thinking of what he could tell her that would make up for what he's done. To make up for leaving her and never coming back. He had his reasons and he still stands by them but they sound stupid when he thinks of telling her what they are. He'd thought long and hard about what Shin said to him. Thought about the tears in her voice when she begged him not to go. He never thought she cared enough back then to avenge him. He had barely let himself hope she cared about him at all. There's been a stone of guilt crushing his chest since he's realized the truth, crushing the elation he should have felt at knowing how much she cares.

He doesn't want to see the hurt that will paint her face when she realizes where he's been. The grief when she finds out what he's put her through. The fury when she knows he's the ones who's hurt her all these long months. What can he say to make it better? He knows it's selfish to expect anything he says to make it better. It's not that easy. So he stays silent, hoping that the words eventually come. He's Spike Spiegel. Smooth words are what he's always been good at. She's Faye Valentine, with her it's even easier because she always plays along. But how can he play with her now when he's played with her heart the past ten months?

She puts him out of his misery of figuring out what to say first.

"It must be so easy to forget up here, isn't it? Looking at the little ants go by down there. Such insignificant, puny little things. So easy to crush underfoot. How easy it must be for you to forget those ants have lives, cares, people they give a shit about..." Her voice is chilling in a way he's never heard before. "Or at least people who gave a shit about them."

He says nothing. He doesn't know what to say. He gulps and he sees the way she clenches her hands, no longer at her waist. Her knuckles are white and she keeps twitching as if barely holding herself back from reaching for her gun.

"So what do you think you can offer me?" she asks, still looking away. There's sardonic humor in her tone and he realizes she's mocking him. "My nephew told you it's not money I'm after. The man who's responsible for this mess is already dead. So then what do you think you can give me that will make it right? Will you bring that son of a bitch back to life so I can kill him myself with that wicked blade of his? Feel his warm blood on my hands and see him writhe in pain as the life leaves his eyes?"

Her voice is so cruel, so cutting and all he can think of is it's his fault. He's done this to her. It hits him in the chest how deeply she cares about him, how furious she truly is and how much of a loss he really was to her. He didn't think she'd be so torn when he was leaving. Paradoxically, a part of him had hoped she wouldn't be just so she wouldn't suffer. He was wrong, and now he's the one suffering for it.

"No?" Faye hums when he says nothing, "You can't do that? How about what I lost then? Can you bring him back? Part of the only family I had left? The one person in this dreary world that made me think it's worth living even if I have nothing?"

Her voice is heavy with so many unnamed emotions and Spike can't stand it anymore. He lets out a strangled sound from the back of his throat.

"Faye," he chokes out. It's barely a whisper but she hears. She stiffens instantly, cold anger radiating off of her in waves.

"What kind of trick is this?" She hisses. Her voice is ice cold and hiding a tremble.

"It's not a tric-"

"LIAR!" She screams, finally whirling around to face him. She recoils like she's been shot in the gut upon seeing his face and her emerald eyes look up with greater fury as she raises her gun. "IT WASN'T ENOUGH TO KILL HIM? NOW YOU PULL THIS?"

Her voice is shaking but her hands are steady and Spike knows she will shoot. Her eyes are wild with grief and Spike hates himself for putting it there in her eyes as he raises his arms in surrender.

"Faye, I promise it's me. It's not a trick."

Her eyes are glistening now and her hands are beginning to shake. Now that she can see him, hear him, practically feel him, she knows it's not a trick.

"It's really me," he whispers.

He sees the minute her grief turns into anger. For a second he feels relief. An angry Faye is easier to deal with than a sad Faye. His heart drops into his stomach like a lead weight at her next words.

"Why shouldn't I kill you then?" she asks him, voice blank and devoid of all emotion. "You're dead aren't you? Have been for the past 10 months. You SELFISH JERK! Did you even think about anyone but yourself?" She's yelling now but what she says next hurts the most. "You wanted to be dead. Stay dead."

A single tear trails down her cheek and that paired with her scathing words tear into him like a bullet. For a second he wonders if she's shot her gun already but it's still there, gripped tightly in her shaking hands.

"Faye, I'm sorry," he begs. "I'm Sorry."

His voice cracks on the last syllable as the rest of her tears finally begin to drip down her cheeks. He shuffles forward and she doesn't move away, frozen in place. His warm hands easily wrestle open her ice-cold ones, letting her Glock fall to the ground as he tugs her closer.

"I didn't know," he whispers, swallowing a lump in his throat. He's struggling to keep himself together in the face of her agony and she sobs beating her hands against his chest as he holds her and lets her cry because he deserves it. It's all his fault. "I'm sorry, I didn't know."

"Were you ever planning on coming back?" He can barely understand her as her words come out in fits and starts on her hitched breath. She's crying with her whole chest, heavy and whole in a way that makes her shake from head to toe, and it isn't pretty and he's the one responsible so he doesn't say a thing. Because of course he wanted to come back. But how could he have?

"I should kill you," she says eventually once her crying is under control. She's trembling still.

"I'd deserve it," he agrees. He wants to cry too at this point, blinking rapidly so the tears gathering at the base of his real eye stay at bay.

"I hate you."

"You don't mean that."

"Yes I do," she sniffles, wiping her face with the back of her hand. It comes away black and she glares up at him. "You made my mascara run."

He wants to laugh now and he's so exasperated at this shrew of a woman with the mood swings who gives him mood swings too. His heart fills with fondness and he pulls her closer, needing her near after so long.

"This is why Jet keeps telling you to buy the waterproof one." He snickers after he says it. It was a whole thing on the Bebop the first time Faye had complained about ruined mascara after a bounty hunt in the rain. She'd whined day and night before Jet had snapped at her and after that Spike had been the one to rib into him for knowing the existence of such a thing.

"With what money, asshole?" she growls but she doesn't pull away much to his relief. "Even this one was fucking expensive. Do you know how much I wasted?"

He knows she's not just talking about today but he doesn't say anything. This distraction, this piece of normality is exactly what they need before they can tackle the emotions running high again.

"I'll buy you more," he says without thinking, his heart overrunning his brain which knows that's not usually how things go in their little games. He's supposed to taunt her so she can parry but he feels apologetic and the feelings in his chest are gathering rather than subsiding.

"Since when do you offer to buy me anything?" She scoffs, clearly picking up on his deviation too.

Spike knows he can deflect. Can buy them some more respite. But he knows it's not fair to her. Knows she wants answers and deserves them too.

"Since I'm the leader of a Martian syndicate. I guess I can afford it now."

She stiffens in his arms and the trembling grows more violent as he feels the exact moment she realizes who he is... What he is. And why they're here to begin with. She realizes the scope of his power, that he's the leader of the Dragons and he still didn't contact them despite being the most powerful man in Tharsis, probably all of Mars. She tries to pull away and he tries to hold on, not ready for the moment she rejects him for maiming her with such a deep wound.

He may have gotten the physical injury of Vicious' blade but Faye got the emotional consequence. And he only aggravated that wound deeper.

She wriggles away, violently wrenching herself out of his arms.

"What reason could you possibly have," she whispers, voice hard and clear as steel. "Give me ONE good reason not to go through with it!" She glances at the gun lying at their feet but doesn't move to pick it up. She's looking for answers, he realizes. She wants to know why and he hates that he's not sure if she'll believe anything he says. That's how deeply betrayed she looks. He opens his mouth to say something but the clench of her jaw makes him reevaluate.

He has many reasons for her, but he knows there is only one that matters. The only one he should tell her. The truth.

"Because I couldn't lose you. Not the way I lost her." Faye stares at him, long and hard and something ugly flashes through her eyes. Spike knows he has to continue before she misunderstands him. "We were born or thrust into this life. Vicious, Me, Julia. We had no choice. But I couldn't let it happen to you if I could stop it."

Faye says nothing. She's still guarded in the way she stands and now Spike can feel himself getting angry. Does she have to be so goddamn stubborn all the time? Why can't she just understand?

"Do you think it was easy for me to leave, Faye?" He growls. "Do you think I wasn't miserable every second of every fucking day here?"

"You could have left," she bites back with a bitter laugh. "You did the first time. Or was I not important enough to run away for?"

And it cuts him to the core to hear these words because she doesn't understand how important she is to him. Doesn't realize how much he'd actually give up for her.

"You were important enough for me to stay. They knew who you were, where you were. They would have come after you just to get to me. Even with Vicious gone, the method of operation is the same." He looks her in the eye, piercing and unwavering. He needs her to understand, needs to emphasize it. "That's why I stayed. You were important enough for me to stay."

Faye blinks as she processes his words. It takes a moment and it's clear she's touched but in a blink her face tightens again. "Do you think it was easier for me to know you were dead? You knew I was alive! That we were alive! We thought you were DEAD and you didn't even have the decency to LET US KNOW?"

"Would you have stayed away if you knew I was alive?" Spike's voice is getting louder too now.

"I-"

"Be honest, Faye! Would you? Would you have stayed away?"

"You didn't even give me a choice!" She yells but then stops. She looks tired and disappointed. "Do you think I would have come for you if you were in danger because of me? I just needed to know you were safe, Spike. I would have hated you for leaving… But I needed to know you were safe."

They're at a stalemate. There's nothing left to say. Spike knows he can apologize again, but it'll be hollow. He's said his piece. Faye looks distractedly at the ground, her hair whipping in the wind as she shivers. She tugs her jacket around her shoulders and she looks so small and so sad and Spike wants nothing more than to make things right. But he doesn't know how to do that, so instead he tries to ask how she's been.

"You found your family again." It's a statement but it holds curiosity to it. He wants to know how she ended up being tied to a syndicate family. She says nothing, still not meeting his eyes. He hates that she can't even look at him. "You know," he tries again with a wry grin, "It's the mark of a true crime leader, sending others to do the dirty work for you. Whatever would I have done if you refused to meet me here today?"

She knows he's referring to her nephew and she can't help the strangled laugh sob that makes its way from the back of her throat. She hates that he has that effect on her.

"I had a family. You broke it when you left."

Spike winces. She really isn't letting him off easy. He knows he deserves it. But he's tired of beating about the bush and he wants to go home. He just isn't sure he'd still be welcome.

"What if I came back? What if I want to come back?" He's almost pleading now but he's realized what he's always known. Going back after spending ten months dead wouldn't be as easy as walking back to welcoming arms.

Faye is silent. She wants him back. She wants him back so much. But she can't shake the feeling of betrayal in her chest remembering the extra meals Jet always made despite how purposeless he felt, the sadness on Ed's face when she came back to the Bebop to find Spike-person would never be coming back and the way Ein pattered around the ship sniffing corners clearly trying to seek their missing member out, always settling in front of Spike's room to fall asleep. She can't shake the way she herself spent countless nights in a limbo, unable to fall asleep, unable to stop crying, eyes rubbed raw and sobs muted by a pillow so Jet and Ed wouldn't worry. They were sad enough without her adding on to it.

Another quiet settles between them as Faye considers his words, the pain of the past ten months clearly visible on her face. It stretches long enough to make him antsy. He doesn't want to make her choose. Doesn't want to force her to forgive him if she can't find it in herself too. Faye has suffered enough in this life without having even more difficult decisions forced on her.

He reaches down to the ground where her gun had clattered when he'd pulled it out of her hands. He holds it out to her, hilt first and she looks confused.

"If you can't forgive me, take me out," and this time he really is begging. "I'd rather it be you."

It's the truth. He'd welcome death by Faye's hand than working for the syndicate for the rest of his life. He'd welcome death by her hand instead of wandering aimlessly for purpose again. He doesn't want to die. He wants to live, for her, with her. But if she can't take him back, there really is nothing left for him to live for anymore. His freedom means nothing if he can't be with his family.

She steps forward into his space, takes the gun from him with a shaking hand, tearing up again as she raises it to his temple. His heart skips a beat in fear of her next action and because of having her so close.

She looks up at him, eyes filled with resentment and something else, refusing to shy away this time.

"I should do it," she tells him. The words are quiet enough to only be heard by the two of them, the wind around them keeping them contained to their little bubble. "After everything you've put me through. I should put a bullet in your head and walk away."

"Then why haven't you?" he whispers back, itching to pull her closer, to close the distance between them. One kiss, and he can die happy.

"You know why, you idiot," and she kisses him.

His arms immediately wrap around her waist pulling her flush against him, his lips feverishly pressing back against hers. The kiss is hard and desperate and angry with all the pent-up grief and longing and frustration of the past year. They battle for dominance in the first minute before he slows down and lets her take control. Their hearts are beating lightning fast by the time she pulls back but this time he's the one who chases her, kissing her a second time for good measure, needing to feel her near still. It's a soft kiss but just as intense as the first, full of sorrow and apology and all the feelings he should have said that night before leaving but was too cowardly to say.

His forehead presses against hers when he finally needs to breathe and his arms are still holding her close. Her hands clutch the lapels of his jacket tightly and it's in that moment with hot breaths mingling in their little pocket of warmth surrounded by the cold air that they feel something in their souls finally mend instead of break.

"So... you won't kill me then?" Spike can't help but ask.

Faye pulls her head away from his but doesn't move to leave the sanctuary of his arms. "I haven't decided yet," she remarks dryly but her eyes are brighter than they were when she arrived and he feels relief knowing things are a little better again.

He knows there's a long road to forgiveness ahead. His actions won't be forgotten so easily and he'll have to work to regain Faye's trust which is so difficult to get but so easily shattered, not to mention the scolding awaiting him from Jet the moment the older man finds out he's alive. He's lucky Ed and Ein will likely only greet him with clinginess and cuddles. But Spike thinks it's worth it. Jet deserves to yell at him a little, just like Faye did. And he'd spend his whole life earning Faye's trust back if he had to.

She is the person who made him want to live again, the one who made him dread the death that had been waiting for him at the end of Vicious' sword. It's pure luck that he had more days to live, more air to breathe, that Shin had saved him when he did even it was for syndicate purposes. But Spike's held up his end of the deal, and now he gets to go home, and while he'll have to pay for those ten months of silence, it's a worthy price for all the years he'll have left with the mismatched people that make up his family and the hunk of scrap metal that makes up their home and the woman who'd somehow crossed time itself in order for fate to have them meet.

They're still broken. It won't be easy to fix the damage left in the wake of his past but they're off to a pretty good start. He'll be officially free of the syndicate in a few days and Faye is in his arms. She doesn't hate him. He gets to go home.

For the first time since he woke up alone in that hospital bed all those months ago, Spike breathes.

How was it? Do let me know if you enjoyed the story and this chapter in the comments! I do hope it wasn't OOC especially based on the scenario. Constructive criticism is appreciated!

Thank you all so much for reading and those who left comments on previous chapters! I appreciate your response so much.

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