Chapter 5: Beginnings

Welcome back! No excuses for why this is way late. My bad. Hope you enjoy! ^-^

When I first stepped inside the mansion, I felt sorely out of place. It was like something out of a novel. I felt the plush red carpet crunch under my feet. The walls were a chestnut brown with golden accents. The feeling of wealth was almost tangible. It was exactly as I remembered it being, and yet I still felt like a foreigner.

Xavier led me through the halls, greeting every student that ran down the stairs or through the hallways. He smiled and waved to the smaller children, who were probably still terrified of what they were. I noticed some of the children looking at me. I was already one of the oldest students at the school, and it didn't help that I was in the same jeans and jacket I had been wearing for three days. I tried to smile at a couple, but no one seemed overly excited to meet the new kid. I couldn't blame them.

Finally, we arrived at Xavier's office, down the main hall, and through doors that were cleverly disguised with the wall. He pushed them open and we both walked inside. There were a couple of students in the office, probably wanting to talk to him about schoolwork or their insecurities. He politely told them to come back in a few minutes. They all fled rather quickly, none of them wanted to disobey a word he said. All except for a girl with blonde hair and green eyes. She must've been my age. She whispered something to him and he nodded. I made eye contact with her before she walked out. I could tell she wasn't impressed.

"Sit," he said. I pulled a velvet chair out from the other end of the desk and he took his place in front of me. "Logan sent you?"

"Yes," I mumbled.

"I haven't seen Logan in months…" He said quietly. He looked, sad, almost. Logan didn't seem like he missed Xavier though. I still had a million questions about Logan, but it wasn't my place to ask now.

"I was here before, professor - " I started to say.

"Of course, I remember you. Louis Laurents, the chimera. I have seen a lot of mutants, but I have to admit, your mutation is rather perplexing,"

"I don't know where to begin," I chuckled. The air was awkward and I don't think either of us knew how to approach the other one. I knew that he already knew everything about me, including what I had done to my family, but he didn't bring it up. I wasn't sure whether that make me nervous or more comfortable.

"We can help you, Louis. Like anything else, you can learn to control your mutation,"

I scoffed. How could he say that to me? I don't think he would ever understand what I was going through. His mutation was invisible, something that no one could see. I bet his family never looked at him terrified. I bet he hasn't seen half of what I've seen.

"With all due respect professor, I'vehurt people. I almost killed my family. I bet you heard about that one. I'm a danger to myself and every student in this school, so I think it would be wise for you to let me go, to keep me as far away from this place as you can. If I stay here I'll only kill and kill until there's nothing left," my voice was cracking. I tried to be strong, but it felt like I was a child that didn't want to tell his parents that he needed help with something. I took a deep breath and put my hands on the table, desperately trying to stop them from shaking.

"With all due respect Louis," he said, obviously mocking me, "I think it would be wise of you to stay here. If you were fending for yourself, there's no telling how many more innocents you would hurt," he paused for a minute, just looking at me. "You aren't the first mutant who's walked into my school with blood on your hands, and you certainly won't be the last."

It became clear that the conversation was over. If I wanted to leave I could. He wouldn't have stopped me, but the way he said it. No telling how many more innocents you would hurt. That hit me like a pile of bricks. After that, time seemed to move at a snail's pace, with each second taking agonizingly long to pass.

"What about my parents?" I asked after an eternity of silence. "I want them to know I'm sorry,"

"And they shall, but - " he paused as if contemplating what to say next, "Not yet," I looked down to the floor. My heart sank to my stomach. I'm sure Xavier could read my mind and know exactly the pain I felt from it. I looked into his eyes and he immediately averted his gaze, raising his hand to his mouth as if trying to prevent himself from speaking more on the subject.

"Bobby Drake is waiting outside my office. I told him you were a new student, but I haven't said anything else. He will show you to your room. If you decide to stay, we'll start your training tomorrow." And with that he wheeled out the office, letting the doors shut behind him. I was alone for a few minutes. What should I do? I could stay here and risk everything. Or I could leave, maybe find Logan again. No. I needed to stay here. If only for a chance to feel like a normal teenager for a short time before my life inevitably falls apart again. I picked myself up and left the office, looking for Bobby on the way out.

…

"So, when did you discover your mutation?" Bobby asked. He was a year or two younger than I was. He had all the makings of the troublemaker. I wondered why Xavier would send a student like this to show me around. I tried not to judge him though, he seemed nice enough, and I could use a friend. "I found out when I was about twelve, and I've been living here ever since."

It instantly became clear that Bobby loved to talk. He went on about how his parents didn't know he was a mutant, and how they just thought he was at an institute for higher learning. He went on about all the other students I should get to know, and about his training with the X-Men. He continued on without receiving any words from me before stopping himself.

"You should tell me when to shut up," he said. "People tell me that sometimes I talk too much."

"It's alright," I said. "Logan picked me up and he didn't want to talk at all, so this is a nice change." That wasn't entirely the truth, but I felt like listening to someone else gave me a break from the thoughts that pounded inside my skull.

Bobby's expression changed when I mentioned Logan. He froze. I now knew that something had gone down between Logan and the rest of the students, I just didn't know what.

"What's wrong? What did Logan do?" I asked. Bobby looked like he had a thousand words on the tip of his tongue, but he kept them inside.

"It's nothing, just, we haven't talked to Logan in a few months. Something happened and he left. He told us he would be back, but he hasn't shown up since." For once, Bobby seemed like he didn't have anything else to say - or rather, anything else he was allowed to say.

The hallways of the mansion seemed endless, and each one seemed to have nicer carpet than the last, with drapes and decor to match. Coming from a middle-class home, this school seemed like a castle, and it was definitely amazing to behold. After what seemed like an eternity of winding hallways and endless dorms, we reached the room assigned to me. It was on the third floor. I noticed that most of the other rooms on this floor were classrooms or recreational spaces, but I couldn't have been happier. Xavier was wise to put me far away from the other dorms.

"Thanks," I said before opening the door.

"No problem," Bobby turned and began to walk away, but I heard his footsteps rapidly reapproaching a few seconds later. "And Louis, we're all playing pool tonight at eight. It's on the main floor a few rooms away from the office. If you want to come, you'd be welcome. I'm sure everyone else wants to me you," he offered a smile and turned down the hallway again.

I told him I'd think about it. I have to admit, it had been a long time since I had done anything that typical teenagers do, but I wasn't sure if I was ready to pretend everything was normal again. I needed a few hours to settle in, but spending some time with the other students didn't seem like such a bad idea at this point.

The dorm was simple enough. A painting of a harbor hung on the east wall, with a twin-sized bed and dresser on the West. A window overlooked the back of the school, and I could see several kids running around and playing basketball on the court below. It wasn't huge, but luckily I didn't have to share like most of the other students. I had a vague memory of sharing a dorm on my first visit, and it wasn't a pleasant experience.

I realized fairly quickly that I didn't have anything. No new clothes, no toiletries, I didn't even have a pair of shoes. Well, this sucks. I thought to myself. I walked over to the dresser and opened the top drawer, and smiled when I saw that it was packed with socks and underwear. The next had shirts and the bottom had pants and shorts. All of them were simple colors and had the school logo embroidered on the chest. Xavier must have known that I had nothing, and I was grateful to him for it. I grabbed a couple and ran my fingers over the soft cotton. I still had so many unknowns in my life, but it really did feel good to do something normal for a change.

I decided to take a shower to clear my head. I grabbed underwear, a clean shirt, and some sweatpants and headed into the joint bathroom. It was down the hall, and since my dorm was one of few on this floor, I had it mostly to myself. It was simple, but the drawers were stocked with toothpaste and a razor, and they'd left deodorant and lotion on the counter. I set aside a few products that I would take back to my room later.

I turned on the shower and stepped in, feeling the warm water. This was a million times better than the shower at the truck stop, and now I almost laughed thinking about it. I sat down on the ground and just let the water hit me, soaking into my hair and running down my chest. It felt good. The monotonous sounds of the water were relaxing, almost like one of those machines people use to help them fall asleep.

another twinge of pain surged through my body, and I clamped my side. A switch was coming. Maybe in a few minutes, maybe later tonight. I pressed my hands against my ears and breathed deeply, praying that it didn't come now.

It didn't. The pain subsided and I was still sitting on the floor of the shower.