16. Claire

Her day had been uneventful and enjoyable and Claire had wondered several times if she wasn't actually dreaming it all. Perhaps she'd soon wake up in her lonely white room like she had done so many times before and that was mainly the reason why she hadn't been able to lay down to sleep despite her exhaustion.

If this was another of her delusional dreams, perhaps she didn't want to wake up from it. This dream was simply perfect: her friends were there, her brother was there. She had to make sure it was real, and so she had stayed up writing on her new journal in her well-lit room. She had bought the notebook earlier in the market. Leon had helped her pick it and he had even bothered to leave her a random message on the first page.

She began by retelling her day, from the overeaten breakfast to her bickering lunch. She had been slightly annoyed at first. However, the anger passed, and after thinking about it with a calmer mind, she could see what both Chris and Leon had wanted to do by putting her under a protection program. She couldn't blame Chris. Claire was his only family, and he had spent eight months torturing himself for her death. Now that she was back and relatively sane, he just wanted to tuck her under his wing and fend off anything that tried to come too close to her. Hadn't Claire been a little like that when she'd crossed half the world looking for him when she was younger? She couldn't be mad at her brother for wanting to keep her safe.

With Leon, things weren't too different, either. She knew the man's intentions weren't different from her brother's, but she couldn't help but feel annoyed that the blonde agent had tricked her instead of telling her from the beginning she was his assignment; her anger had long passed, and now she could only laugh at her foolishness. After all, teasing her like that was something that was so Leon.

"Everyone is so protective of me now. It feels strange. I was on my own for so long and now it feels like no one wants to take their eyes off from me…"

Can you blame them?

Her younger doppelganger was sitting at the foot of the bed. Her arms and legs crossed, and the long ponytail falling over her shoulder.

Claire had told Leon she had hallucinations sometimes; but that she had been okay lately. She didn't say that there was a regular hallucination that never went away, no matter if she felt well or wrong.

"No, I certainly can't. If you lost something, and that something suddenly returned, you'll want to keep it safe. It's natural."

But the closer they get, the more in danger they'll be. From the demons, from them, and you.

Her doppelganger whispered. Her eyes were staring at the room's wall.

"From me, yes. .I can't trust myself anymore, can I?"

They're still there. Lurking and waiting for the chance to come out. What will you do?

"I don't know. How do I fight something I can't understand?"

What's there to understand? They're inside, and they want to come out. They're waiting for you to give up...let yourself fall, like the others did… the question is , will you?

"It's hard…"

No one said it'll be easy; but we have made it this far, haven't we?

Claire didn't answer. She stared at her hallucination with the pen held firmly in her hand as if staring at herself would somehow give her answers.

You told him.

"He wanted to know…"

But he might have thought you were crazy.

"I hoped he wouldn't."

Hope….how do you know he doesn't think it now?

"Am I crazy?"

I don't know. Are you?

"You're always so cryptic…"

So are you. I am you, too. Don't forget that.

Claire sighed. She had to be crazy if she was arguing with herself. She never had the chance to answer since a knock at the door made the illusion go away.

"Come in…"

The door opened, and to her surprise, Leon stepped into the room and looked around curiously.

"I thought you were talking with someone…"

"Just talking to myself…" Claire replied, knowing that Leon had no idea how literal the statement was, "It's late. What are you doing around? Shouldn't you be sleeping?"

"Shouldn't you…?"

"Too much adrenaline on me…" Claire said, shaking her head, "I can't sleep. Did you come to check on me, bodyguard?"

Leon smirked at the last statement. He shook his head and sat down on the man and put down the small package he'd been holding under his arm.

"Came to tell you about the assignment."

"We are discussing my security measures, then…" Claire frowned, "I think I know protocols, Leon. Don't breathe, don't eat, don't move….right?"

"Not quite…"Leon replied shaking his head with a smile " There are some...special aspects in this case."

"Special?"

"The higher-ups considered it better to keep your return secret."

"That makes sense…" Claire nodded, "So let me guess, I'll be going undercover…"

"You don't miss a thing, huh?"

"I've learned a thing or two."

"I'll be staying with you since I'm supposed to be your guard 24/7…"

"Yey, we are roomies…" Claire said sarcastically.

"Additional to that, there'll be another agent watching over you. Her name is Helena Harper. You'll meet her when we arrive in the USA."

"Great, now I have two shadows. Anything else I should know?

"This is your new identity…" he said, passing her a folder, "Hiwamura said she'll help you with the image arrangement."

"Please tell me I won't be blonde…"

"You're keeping your pretty red locks, Claire. Don't worry about that…"

Claire picked the folder and began eyeing it.

"Clara Driscoll. So I am Welsh now? " she said amused, and she added with a pretty accurate Welsh accent, "well, look at that. Fancy a cuppa with me, some time, my dear?"

"Surprisingly, your accent isn't that bad," Leon snorted.

Claire smirked and continued reading the file.

"Well, I am still a biologist. That's nice. Wait, it says I am married…"

"Yes, you are…"

"You know there's a problem there. To be married means I have a husband. As far as I know, I don't have one…."

Leon let out a chuckle.

"You do…"

"Huh? Who….? You?" Claire said, rolling her eyes.

"Way too smart…" Leon smirked, pulling her hand and slipping the wedding ring into her ring finger, "Mrs. Kennedy."

Claire choked. She stared at his hand and then at Leon in disbelief.

"What?"

"You're officially married to me, Claire...or should I say Clara?" he said, showing her his own ringed hand.

"You've got to be kidding me…" Claire said, covering her face with her hand.

She could sense Leon laughing silently. Of course, he would find it amusing. Married? To him, nevertheless. Was this any kind of sick joke planned by Saya?

Don't say you don't like it. You wanted to have more time with him, didn't you?

The comment felt unwelcomed. Claire took a deep breath and began pacing around the room, trying to put her thoughts in order.

"We'll be posing as newlyweds, and you'll be working under the DSO. No one in the organization knows you, so it'd be safer than putting you on BSAA or Terra Save. Of course, you'll still have access to your team and your lab, don't worry; but as far as you're concerned you're a DSO agent like me. I'm supposed to be on my honeymoon in Wales right now."

"Oh, god...whose twisted mind came with this idea?"

"Don't ask me…"

"Chris is going to be pissed. He's going to kill you. Wait, that was why you were so worried about being on Chris's list?"

"Not exactly, but Chris already knows, and surprisingly he was quite acceptant. Besides, if he wants to kill someone, he might as well kill his boss."

"You're telling me Chris agreed to my «marriage»?"

"Well, I had to stand 2hours of lecturing and threats while Jill and Barry were laughing themselves to death in the background, but yes."

Claire couldn't take it, and she just burst into a laugh. That was so Chris. He had done the same several times before. She still remembered the poor kid who had come for a study session when she was in eighth grade; Chris made a completely interrogatory about his family, criminal record, and intentions. She should have been furious, but she remembered that she had just found the situation completely hilarious. The kid was left so traumatized that he never came to her house again. She couldn't picture Christ putting Leon through all that.

"You seem amused. I assume this isn't the first time Chris does something like that." Leon said with a frown.

"Yup, he did it all the time. I just can't imagine him doing it to you, though. Tell me Jill recorded it…"

"You should ask her. I was too busy listening to your brother to notice…"

The two laughed. Somehow that made Claire feel much better. It wasn't a big deal. It wasn't a real marriage, and they were just acting. Why would she get so worked up about it?

"If Chris was fine with it, then you're safe." Claire giggled, "But I am worried about myself…"

"What for? It's not like he's going to do something…"

"Not Chris. Your fans…"

"My what…"

"Let's be realistic. I am 100% sure that all the young ladies at your office are head over heels for you. Now I show up being your wife? They're going to eat me alive."

"You'll barely be in there anyway, and besides...you sure can take them."

"Ah...you have no idea." Claire dropped herself back on the bed and looked at him, "So...Mrs. Kennedy. Oh, lord. That's sure going to take some used to…"

"You'll make it. Hiwamura will come tomorrow to help you with the change of looks."

"Oh, god...she's going to torture me, isn't she?"

"I don't think so...she said you never use makeup, so a little makeup, lenses, and hair extensions should work wonders."

"Yeah, she's going to torture me. I spent seven years running away from her fashion madness, and you guys just threw me into her hands. Forgive me if I feel betrayed, " Claire sighed, "Traitors."

"Seven years?"

"Long story."

Claire looked at her, now ringed, hand. The ring was pretty, made of silver and with a brilliant, diamond that looked almost real. It made her think back to her mother's ring.

"So, dear husband of mine. Who bought the ring…" Claire said teasingly.

"I guess it was Hunnigan?" Leon shrugged, "or Helena, who knows...why?"

"Oh, no. Nothing. I just thought it looked real. I'm not a fan of diamonds but this is pretty."

"There, I thought all women loved diamonds…"

"Most would. I just prefer emeralds."

"I'll keep in mind for our anniversary…" Leon snorted.

"Ha, ha...very funny," Claire said, throwing him a pillow, "It's getting late. You should go to bed, Leon."

"You, too. You must be tired, anyway. I'll see you in the morning."

Leon got back on his feet and walked out of the room, leaving her alone once more. Claire watched the closed door for a few minutes before looking back at the rings in her hand.

I am married. Wouldn't it be nice if it was real?

Claire took a deep breath, and ignoring the voice in her head, she laid on her back, trying to sleep.

Morning came accompanied by a light shower; Claire hadn't slept much; her dreams had been stalked by shadowy figures that she couldn't recognize, but feared nevertheless. She had waited until the sun was out before abandoning the safety her illuminated room provided. The corridors from BSAA base were empty, except for the few soldiers that had the early morning shifts that walked around holding mugs filled with either coffee or tea.

Claire made her way to the eating hall and paced around the coffee table, thinking of what she should drink when she felt someone pat her shoulder.

"No caffeine for you, honey," Saya said sternly.

"I wasn't going to…" Claire said, honestly, "I was wondering which tea I should pick today."

"Peppermint or wild berries are good," Saya suggested, "I hate to say it, Claire, but you look terrible."

"Geez, thank you…" Claire said, pouring the hot water into the cup and adding the small teabag, "Didn't have a good night…"

"Nightmares?"

"Psychosis…" Claire sighed.

"You know that's not an answer."

"I kept waking up every hour feeling that someone was with me, I could almost see the shadowy figures moving around me…" Claire replied, "I was half asleep, so no surprise in there, but...it made me restless."

"I see…" Saya said, thoughtful, "Biscuit?"

Claire grabbed the pastry and put it on her plate. Both women walked to a corner in the hall and sat on the table that faced a wide window.

"Why didn't you ask your husband to make your company?"

Claire choked with the tea. Some of the hot drops fell on her lap, and she quickly cleaned herself with a napkin.

"I could swear you were the one who suggested that plan, Saya."

"Hey, I'd love to take the credit, but no. I am not sure who was the genius who did that."

"Right, what's so genius about Leon and I faking a marriage."

"You two pair of lovebirds are too foolish to realize your feelings for each other. This opportunity should give it a push…"

"Excuse me…" Claire frowned, "Since when…? God, Saya. It was a crush! An old teenage crush…"

"Is it? Well, is it really like that, or you're in denial?"

"Denial of what?"

"Do you still have a thing for certain agents…?"

"Saya, I am smart enough not to go after Leon. That's doomed to fall into a heartbreak…"

"And you know this because…?"

"It's Leon. His heart and head are somewhere else…" Claire replied, sipping her tea.

"Of course he is, and that's, exactly, why he came every month after your disappearance to leave a bouquet of fresh orchids under your picture in the memorial wall…"

"He did…? Why? "

"You're asking me?"

"We are friends. It was a friendly gesture…"

"Every month, Claire...orchids. Not even your brother did that."

"Chris has a coping mechanism that either throws him into full work mode or full drinker mode. I don't see anything rare on that…"

"I'm just saying that maybe this is just a sign for you to give it a try…"

"Give it a try?"

"Just saying. By the way, we have a girls' date today…"

"Augh…" Claire sighed dramatically, "Yeah, Leon already told me about my makeover…"

"Oh, husband already told you?"

"Can you stop saying it like that?"

"Anyway, Jill is going to help, too. God knows we need all the female work for this."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"That you, honey can kiss your tomboyish look goodbye."

"You're brewing a recipe to disaster."

"Wouldn't be that sure… Jill, over here!"

Jill, who had just picked her cup of coffee and muffin, saw them and smiled. The blonde woman walked to them and sat by Claire's side cheerfully.

"You two are certainly early." she smiled " Ready for today's mission?"

"Claire here doesn't look too happy about it."

"It'd be fun, Claire. "

"What's fun about you using me like a doll?"

"We'll just make you prettier and have the whole world envy Leon for his new bride."

"Good lord, are you going to keep rubbing it on my face?"

Both Jill and Saya laughed.

"You are already wearing the ring, though," Jill observed, "It's pretty…"

"Well, it's not like I have a choice…" Claire replied, biting her cookie.

"And where are the gentlemen?"

"Chris was speaking to Leon. Hopefully, he's not giving him another lecture…" Jill laughed, "Don't worry. I left Barry with them, and I'm sure he can restrain Chris if necessary…"

"Poor Leon…" Claire said, rolling her eyes, "So, what's exactly the plan today?"

"Simple. Hair and makeup." Saya replied.

"I won't be dying my hair."

"Who said you had to?" Jill smiled, "Last time I checked Mrs. Kennedy was a ginger…"

"Not you, too, Jill.." Claire rolled her eyes once more, "You guys realize this all an act, right?"

"Yes, we know, but that doesn't mean we can't enjoy it." Jill answered, "And I am happy to get a break from the excess of testosterone that surrounds me, for a change."

"Poor thing…"

Claire sighed and kept eating her tea and humble breakfast; while paying no attention to the conversation taking place between Jill and Saya. She bit another cookie. Suddenly, it was as if the earth under her feet got pulled away, and her ears filled up by some kind of void. Everything around became a blur, and suddenly, she found herself sitting on a cold tiled floor at the center of an empty hall.

Claire looked around, confused at how she had arrived there; she had been having breakfast with Jill and Saya, and suddenly, she was in a completely different place. Looking around, she realized she was wearing a white gown that was splattered in red stains. Her hands, too, were covered in a thick red liquid and the ferric smell filled her nostrils, making her want to throw up. She began hearing murmurs; whispers that came from nowhere and then a loud voice: cold, demanding, and unknown; but the sound of it sent chills all over her body.

"So she made it...not bad. It seems we were right to get her. She might be ready for stage 2; make the proper preparations. Increase the dosage of psychotropics and put her back into isolation."

Stage 2. Why did that sound so familiar? She heard a soft click from a lock opening, and suddenly, a pair of tall figures hidden by the shadows walked in. She wanted to back up, but her legs were suddenly too weak to respond. One of the shapes stretched its hand and grabbed her shoulder; and then…

Claire snapped, accidentally knocking the cup of tea to the floor where it crashed and broke into several pieces. The two women sitting by her side stared at her, surprised. Claire's heart was beating fast and it took her a couple minutes to remember where she was and then, she realized that the hand on her shoulder was actually Chris's.

"Jesus, you almost gave her a heart attack, Chris…" Barry blurted out.

Claire looked around. The hall wasn't empty; it was full of soldiers eating and chatting cheerfully. She looked down at her hands, and, to her relief, they were clean.

Chris crouched in front of her, his face filled with worry, and that made her feel guilty.

"Claire?"

"S...sorry, I think I might have dozed off…" she laughed off, "You startled me…"

"You sure?"

"Yeah, I didn't sleep that well last night, so I guess I kind of fell asleep for a bit," Claire quickly nodded.

"Maybe you should take a nap, honey…" Saya suggested, "It's still quite early if you're tired…"

"Nah, I'm fine. Sorry, I scared you…"

"Okay, but if you feel like you need to sleep, do it, alright?"

"I will, Chris. Don't worry…" Claire looked around, and she realized that Leon wasn't around. "Weren't you with Leon?"

"Well. look at that…" Barry laughed, "less than 24h married, and she's already so concerned…"

Claire rolled her eyes while Chris began glaring daggers at the older man, but Barry was way too experienced to be intimidated by Chris, and he simply laughed.

"We were checking the blueprints of your new place this morning. We found some blind points, so he went to tell his friend to fix it up…"

At least he hadn't been lecturing the poor man.

"Oh, I see. So is my bunker cozy enough?" Claire asked.

"You'll be fine with it…" Chris shrugged, "You three are going out?"

"No, we'll be doing this in Jill's room. We already got the tools yesterday." Saya replied.

"What are you guys doing in the meantime?"

"We'll be reviewing possible locations. Leon is helping out so. We might be able to pinpoint something…"

"Try with psychiatric hospitals…" Claire said, and Chris looked at her, "or hospitals in general."

"Psychiatric ?"

"I think it was a psychiatric asylum, but I am not sure," Claire replied, pinching the bridge of her nose, "That's why I panicked the first time I woke up in the MedCenter. I thought I had returned. The place I was, I mean..."

"Anything else you remember?" Jill asked.

Claire tried to think, but it only gave her a headache.

"Sorry, I don't think it's enough to help. I just keep seeing white halls, and beds, and smelling sanitizer."

"That's fine," Chris said, "don't push yourself. We'll deal with that," Chirs smiled at her, "You three have fun, I suppose…"

"More like they will have fun at making me suffer…"

"Don't be silly, Claire. It'd be worthy…" Jill said "We'll take good care of her, Chris. Don't worry. When you see her later today, even you won't recognize her…"

"Right... "

Chris patted his sister's shoulder and Claire considered begging him to save her from whatever torture that two other women were preparing for her, but she bit her lower lip and sighed in resignation.

It couldn't be that bad, could it?