Chapter 4: To Be a Black
"You're crazy… Nobody has a brother!"
Lexa held her ground as the young people around her tittered and laughed at her words, disbelief on each and every one of their faces. Her own expression didn't change, remaining aloof and unconcerned despite the internal confusion that her own words had caused.
I am Lexa Black…
Lexa Black.
The name felt right somehow. Like it had always been hers, and her mind spun with the possibilities it created. Was this the explanation for the strange memories and thoughts that had been assaulting her since she awoke to darkness? The reason for the clothes she wore, and the comfort and familiarity she felt even now with the forbidden technology around her? Was she truly still Leksa kom Trikru, Heda and Commander of the Coalition of the Twelve Clans, or had she been changed… Transfigured by her death into something, or someone, completely new?
…this is my brother, Aden.
This also felt true, but rather than the deep uneasiness and uncertainty that her new identity had caused, this affirmation of their close bond even in this life brought her a measure of comfort. She was accustomed to being alone, of course. After Costia's death, and before Clarke came into her life, she had learned to face the world's challenges on her own. Love was weakness. It was this belief which had allowed her to continue on even after having heard news of Anya's death. This truth which made her capable of carrying out Gustus' punishment for his crimes, despite knowing that he had done what he had done only out of love for her.
Then, everything changed when a girl dropped out of the sky and showed her that perhaps she deserved more than to just survive alone. Deserved more than to live a life without love. She had begun to believe, after finding Clarke again, after being forgiven by her, that she might be able to change that now. To begin to depend upon someone else for once. To form a true partnership with the woman she loved, so they might shoulder the burdens of leadership together and be stronger for it… But Clarke was not here now, and Lexa feared the possibility that she might never be found at all in this strange, other place. The thought terrified her. To be completely alone in the world again – to be without the woman she loved – now seemed a fate worse than the death she had apparently escaped.
But now there was Aden at her side, the Nightblood boy whom she had always cared too much for. Her brother, it seemed, in this life, and also her only current link to who she had been before. She didn't yet know why, or how, he was here with her, but she did know that he was quite possibly the only other person in the world who even knew of the existence of Clarke, the girl who had fallen from the sky and changed her life forever. She resolved in that moment to do whatever it took to keep the boy safe, a fierce protectiveness for him filling her, bandaging some of the cracks she felt in her heart over Clarke's absence. Until she could discover her true purpose here, she would make it her mission to see that Aden came to no harm.
"He is my brother," she stated again with conviction, addressing the boy who had laughed and shouted at her. "What reason would I have to lie?"
Silence greeted her at this, then a skinny, hawkish looking girl spoke up, tucking her long hair behind her ears nervously as she did so.
"I think she might be telling the truth. I heard that the kid isn't registered… I was there when they brought him in yesterday, and some of the guards were talking about him."
"Woah, man, that's awesome!" said another, this time a scrawny youth who sported a pair of goggles perched jauntily on top of his head. "You're like a total fugitive, little dude… What did they do, hide you under the floorboards when you were born?"
Lexa ignored the laughter and questions that followed, her mind working at a furious pace. She gave Aden a cautionary glance, telling him with a look to keep his mouth shut and follow her lead. He nodded once in reply, his eyes burningly intense, posture alert. Aden was clever and very skilled for his age, and she felt she could count on him not to do or say anything foolish.
"But what are you doing here? What's with the guard uniform?" someone asked, not without a little hostility.
They're all criminals, she remembered suddenly, recalling one of the few conversations she and Clarke had shared about the friends who had landed with her. Clarke might not be here now, but Finn Collins certainly was, and this was definitely the same ship she had seen before, though it was unmarked by the ravages of time spent on the ground. Perhaps the current circumstances were largely the same as when Clarke had descended in the dropship from the Ark, with only small details having changed? Perhaps Lexa's and Aden's very presence had changed things somehow, altered the way things were supposed to be? These assumptions all seemed plausible… Never mind that she had absolutely no idea how any of this was possible in the first place.
With the jacket I am wearing, they are all wondering right now if I am a member of the guard… They will never trust me if they think I am one of those who kept them imprisoned.
"I'm here for my brother," she told them, keeping her explanations simple for now, "I borrowed the uniform to get access to the ship… It was the only way."
"Borrowed? That's a laugh… Stolen is probably more like it."
"Hey, I guess that makes her one of us after all, huh?" someone else added, and the people around them laughed, some of the tension disappearing as quickly as it had formed.
"Okay, enough with the family drama already… Can we get the hell out of here, or what?" a sharp voice asked, and this time she was finally able to see the person whom she had heard speaking multiple times before. It took her several seconds to realize who he was, so greatly was he transformed from when she had seen him last.
The Skaikru prisoner… of course, she thought, surprised at the stab of guilt she felt in seeing him. She had not been the one to order his torture, but he had suffered greatly at the hands of a man whose actions she was ultimately responsible for. Was every sky person whom she had ever brought suffering upon now going to appear before her in this place? If that were the case, then shouldn't Clarke be here as well?
If I didn't know better, I might think the spirits are mocking me.
The attention of the crowd turned away from the two of them after that, everyone pressing closer to the exit and resuming their earlier arguments. As the people moved away, Lexa saw Finn again in the space that had been created. He was kneeling, a thoughtful expression on his face as he considered the body of a young man lying on the floor there, a small pool of blood forming around his crushed skull. She walked over to him, curious.
"What happened to him?"
Finn didn't answer right away, the seriousness on his face a sharp contrast to the earlier flirtation and good humor he had greeted her with when he found her trapped inside the wall.
"It was stupid," he said finally, glancing up at her. "I took off my seatbelt when we undocked and the gravity kicked off… Just wanted to have a little fun before dying, you know?" He paused. "I didn't tell him to follow me. If he'd stayed in his seat, he'd still be alive."
Lexa watched him carefully, interested in him despite herself. This was someone Clarke had cared for in another life, after all. She found that she wanted to know why.
"Responsibility for one's actions are always one's own, it's true," she told him, then added, "But so are we also responsible for the actions which we inspire in others… It's a painful lesson to learn, but one worth remembering."
He stared up at her at her words, something unreadable in his eyes. She didn't flinch under his gaze, but rather just regarded him steadily, her own eyes trying and failing to weigh the person before her. Who was Finn Collins? Was he merely a murderer waiting to emerge, or was there more to this person than his confident swagger and charming smiles? She supposed she would find out soon enough. In the meantime, she hoped no one else would die because of his mistakes.
"Was that supposed to be comforting?" he asked her.
"No. Just true."
"Well, then…" he sighed, climbing back up to his feet and smiling at her again. "I don't know about you, but I'm ready to get out of here. What do you say, gorgeous? Ready to see the ground at last?"
She frowned.
"Lexa."
"What?"
"My name. It's not 'gorgeous', it's Lexa," she told him, aggravated despite herself by his insolent, familiar tone.
"Ah, I see," he said with a smug smile. "You don't like being called gorgeous… Do you, gorgeous?"
Infuriating… idiotic... boy!
She turned away from him, not wanting him to see her annoyance, catching as she did so the small smile on Aden's face. He had been standing behind her and had no doubt caught every word of their conversation.
"Aden," she said, and his smile disappeared as he nearly came to attention at her tone. "Follow me."
Together, they crossed the lower deck of the dropship and elbowed their way to the hatch door. Once people realized who it was pushing through them, they quickly began to move out of her way on their own, though whether this was because of something about her specifically or merely a learned response to the guard's jacket she wore, she couldn't be sure.
"Come on, Murphy, screw them! Just do it already," someone shouted as they approached.
The Skaikru prisoner – whose name was Murphy, it seemed – was standing toe-to-toe with two other boys, their faces all an angry red from the heat of the confrontation. It seemed Murphy had tried to open the door once already, but the other two had stopped him. Their determination was clear on their faces, though it seemed most of the other assembled teens didn't agree with them and preferred to try their luck outside. Lexa strode up to the door's hatch controls, ignoring the dramatic scene that was unfolding right next to her. Not stopping to overthink how she knew what she was doing, she flipped open the latch cover and had already tore loose the safety wiring before anyone even had time to respond.
"Hey! What are you doing?" one of the boys arguing with Murphy said, stepping towards her threateningly.
Lexa raised an eyebrow, his childish bluster failing to intimidate her.
"I'm going home," she answered, and with a sharp pull and a twist, Lexa manually disengaged the electrical locks of the giant hydraulic door and watched as, with a mighty groan, it fell open before them. A stunned silence followed, the bright outside light pouring in on the gathered faces, a blast of fresh, pine-scented air accompanying it and instantly filling Lexa's lungs and soul.
She looked to Aden, who was now standing alone beside her, the others having fallen back in surprise when the door opened, and gave him the smallest of private smiles. He smiled back at her shyly, excitement glowing in his eyes. They were in this together now, whatever challenges might come, and together they would face whatever… or whoever might be waiting for them in this strange, and yet so achingly familiar place and time.
I don't know what's coming, or what destiny has led me to this place, but I am here, Clarke, and I swear that I will find you again… Wherever you might be…
…Whoever you are.
And with that oath made, Lexa and Aden Black stepped off of the dropship together and into the unknown of the world beyond.
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"We have a right to know!"
"I saw the ship launch myself… Are you calling me a liar? We deserve to know what's happening!"
Anya slowed in her approach to the Council chambers, the mingled shouts and cries of the angry crowd growing outside its doors reaching her as soon as she entered the hallway. There were perhaps two dozen people already there, their fists clenched and voices raised in combined anger. Two guards stood in front of the crowd barring their way, sweat and stress building on their faces as they tried to keep the assembled men and women under control.
A ship launch? Anya thought, her concern growing. Oh hell, what has Jaha done now?
"Out of my way," she ordered as she approached the crowd, her voice ringing with impatience. She didn't have time for dealing with this mob, though she did wonder at its reasons for being. The meeting just beyond those doors was to start in less than a couple minutes. Although Anya sometimes enjoyed arriving with no time to spare for one of Jaha's more routine meetings – it was an excellent way to simultaneously tweak the Chancellor's nose and assert Polaris station's special status and relative independence – she was also always careful to never actually be late, and today was not the time for those types of games.
A red-faced man turned to face her, his demeanor aggressive and confrontational.
"You! You're on the Council! Tell us what's going on… Is the ground livable again? Is that why the Council is sending people down there?!"
He pressed forward, nearly touching her, and Anya felt herself go both still and coldly furious at his audacity.
"I'll only say this one more time," she told him, her voice as sharp and cutting as broken glass, "Out. Of. My. Way… Now."
The man took another step, his arms stiffening at his sides, and Anya had a second to consider whether or not he might actually try to hurt her before he was suddenly down and gasping, a shockstick buzzing in the air next to him. The sound of the electric lash striking flesh made the crowd grow quiet, their eyes wide and alarmed.
"Unless each and every one of you would like to be tried and convicted for the unlawful obstruction of the Council in carrying out its appointed duties, which is a capital crime, for which the punishment is immediate execution by floating, then I suggest you disperse right… now."
The man's voice was firm and unyielding, and it cowed the gathering crowd better than a bucket full of ice water could have. First in ones, then twos and threes, the people began to shuffle away, their faces still quietly desperate, but knowledge of just how swift and total the Ark's system of justice was keeping them from disobeying.
"I did not ask for your help, Kane, nor did I need it."
"You should be thanking me, Councilwoman," Marcus Kane told her, a hard glint in his eye. "I saw the look in your eyes… You're fortunate it was me that took him down and not you. Unlike you, a guard cannot be charged with assault for striking an Ark citizen first."
"Truer words…" she replied in droll, mocking tones, knowing exactly how to goad him.
He frowned at this, which made her smile, which then made him flush in return as he finally caught her meaning.
"You know as well as I that the Ark Charter gives an officer of the guard the authority to…"
"Yes, yes, Marcus, the Ark Charter, I know," she interrupted him, "I would love to hear more, of course, but I'm afraid I must be going. Council meeting, you understand. I wouldn't want to be late."
Anya brushed past the Ark's Chief of Security, the man's expression darkening as his eyes watched her go… And he was watching her go, she knew, no doubt hating himself a little for noticing how attractive she looked walking away from him in her professional steel gray skirt, jacket and heels. Just as she also knew it had bothered him that she hadn't appreciated his assistance.
Men… she thought. Even the interesting ones are so predictable.
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Chancellor Thelonious Jaha stood in the center of the Council meeting chamber, his eyes scanning in a wide circle as he appraised each and every one of the gathered officers, knowing without counting them that he was going to come up short by one.
Damn that woman… and damn Polaris station, he thought to himself, struggling not to let his aggravation show.
As he had often done since taking office, Jaha cursed the first Chancellor of the Ark for his decision not to blow Polaris out of the sky when they initially refused to join. It was a nearly forgotten footnote in history for most, but as the current Chancellor, Jaha had access to all of the restricted records, so he knew the true story and not just the one told by children on Unity Day.
In the first couple years after the destruction of the planet, each of the thirteen surviving stations had existed separately and independent from one another. However, what remained of humanity soon realized that they must band together if they were ever going to survive long enough to see future generations return to Earth. A plan was devised and the Ark was born, all stations quickly agreeing to join. All… except for Polaris, that is. Polaris station – already unusual in that it was in fact a privately owned research station, whose prior purpose and function had never been fully explained even to this day – remained stubbornly apart, resisting all attempts to force it to join. The newly appointed Chancellor at the time had finally given the station an ultimatum: join, or be blown from the sky. Incredibly, the stubborn Polaris stationers had refused, calling the Chancellor's bluff.
Oh, Jaha didn't doubt that the man had truly thought he would go through with it. He had read the journals, seen the log entries. The decision had clearly tormented him for days. But in the end, the first Chancellor, who had witnessed the death of the planet only three years before, couldn't bring himself to be the cause of more senseless death and suffering. He hadn't gone through with it. Instead, a revision to the Ark Charter was offered up as a bargaining chip, and Polaris station finally agreed to become the 13th station of the Ark. The only station of the Ark which enjoyed a unique status under the Special Amendment to the Ark Charter.
The source of Jaha's frustration, Councilwoman and Senior Station Representative Anya Petrova, finally entered, and he couldn't help himself from glancing at his watch as she did so. She was exactly on time.
Of course.
If it were up to him, the woman wouldn't even be on his Council… But it wasn't up to him. As the elected Station Representative of Polaris, her position on his Council was automatic, as was dictated by the Special Amendment. Each of the other Council members were nominated by him first, and then approved by the current members of the Council, but not Anya Petrova. No, she was here because the first Chancellor of the Ark had been too weak to do what needed to be done all those years ago, and Polaris had been a constant destabilizing influence and thorn in the side of every Chancellor ever since.
If the first Chancellor had done his job and made an example out of Polaris like he should have done, the Sydney station incident would never have occurred, Jaha thought to himself. No station would have dared to rebel after seeing Polaris blown to pieces... That's exactly why being able to sacrifice is so important! Even if no one else is strong enough, I know I can't afford to be weak and make the same mistakes that the first Chancellor did.
Shaking himself free from his thoughts – and his annoyance with the thirteenth station and its current leader, as he suspected that frustrating him was exactly why she did half the things she did, and he didn't want to give her the satisfaction of seeing him squirm – Thelonious Jaha took his place at the round table in the center of the room and gestured for the Council members to join him.
"Welcome, everyone. Please, take your seats. I have something very important to tell you all."
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The figures of a slender, brown haired woman and a slim, blond haired boy slipped around the side of the dropship where it stood, upright and imposing like an ancient stone monolith in the trees. They stepped into the further darkness of the nearby forest, both looking more at home there than they had inside the impressive construction of steel and composite, and paused to listen to the whoops and hollers of the excited teens who were exploring the ground around them for the first time.
"They're worse than children… and just as clumsy in the woods," Aden sniffed disdainfully in Trigedasleng, and Lexa had to agree, though she didn't say so.
The Sky People had quickly rushed from the dropship after her and Aden had led the way, and now they were running through the woods in delirious happiness, excited by everything they saw, heard and smelled, no thought in their minds for possible dangers.
"From now on, as long as we are among them, we should use their language only. Even if we think we are alone," she told him, caution in her tone, and the boy nodded.
"What is this, Commander? How did we get here?" he asked, and she could see the uncertainty in him. These were the first words they had shared without being observed, and she could almost see him physically restraining himself from bombarding her with questions. His eyes on her were bright and trusting. She was Heda, and it was only right that he expected her to have all the answers.
How much do I tell him? she asked herself, thinking of the reaction he might have to learning of Titus' betrayal and her own death, wishing to spare him the pain of learning what the man had done to her. As Titus had been her teacher, so too was he Aden's, and it would no doubt be a terrible shock to the boy, as it had been to her.
Unless… she thought, suddenly chilled by a realization. I died, and somehow after dying was brought into this new life with all of my memories of the last still intact. There are others here, it's true, but Finn did not know me here, nor did Murphy, and surely one or both of them would not have been able to conceal it had they recognized my face… But why Aden, then? He is also here, and he also remembers… What if he died as well, and that is how we both came to be in this place together?
"Aden," she said, after taking a moment to check that they were still completely alone and out of anyone's hearing, her voice calm and measured to conceal the urgency she felt, "I need you to tell me everything you can remember about what happened in Polis just before you came here. Do you remember training with the other Natblidas in the evening, just before the storm came?"
"Yes, we finished training a little early in order to beat the storm back to the tower… I remember I helped pull the cart with the others," he replied, and she nodded for him to continue, glad that at least they seemed to be remembering the same day.
"Good, what else? What's the last thing you remember doing before you were here?"
Did something terrible happen to you, Aden? she wanted to ask, her heart like a stone in her chest. Did you die slowly, suffering and alone, murdered by the hands of someone you trusted?
Lexa swallowed, struggling to stifle the emotion she could feel rising from within her, unable to stop the thought which followed.
…Were you killed because, out of all the others, he knew I cared for you the most?
The boy's gaze went distant for a moment, then he shrugged, frowning a bit as he answered.
"Well, nothing happened, Heda… I went to the Sacred Chamber to wait for my training with the Fleimkepa, just as he asked me to, but he never arrived. He told me it might be a while, that he had some things to take care of first, so I waited for him there… And then, I opened my eyes, and I was sitting on a strange bed in a small, white room, and men were coming through the door. Skaikru, I think. They were wearing your jacket," he told her pointing at the coat she still wore, the symbol of the Sky People emblazoned upon its dark surface in muted colors of gray and brown.
"You were in the Sacred Chamber?" she asked, not masking the surprise in her voice.
"Yes, Heda," he said, and she noticed the pride in him, the way he stood slightly taller before her when he said next, "Titus told me that you wanted me to train with the Natgonas… and that I was to increase my training with him as well."
She had to smile a little at this, despite her worry, as she couldn't help but be amused by how anxious Aden was to please her, to prove himself. He was hardly a little boy anymore – rather, he was only a head shorter than she was now and growing larger every day – but he was still boy enough to yearn for her approval and encouragement. Titus would have told her she was being soft on him, that she needed to keep her distance and let him toughen up, but she found she no longer cared to consider Titus' past advice.
"It was Godan who saw your performance and deemed you worthy of the Natgonas, so you earned your place among them, Aden. I'm confident you would have done well."
Aden flushed at her praise. Then, his voice a little brighter and more confident, he continued his story, describing to her how the men had forced him to change into the clothes he now wore. That he had been marched with the others through a confusing labyrinth of narrow metal halls to the dropship. They had all been strapped into their seats, and a man in a white coat had gone up to each of them, fastening a painful metal band around their wrists.
"Show it to me," she demanded, and the boy rolled up his left sleeve, displaying the strange bracelet to her. She could just see where several small needles pierced his flesh, but otherwise it didn't appear to be doing any great harm. She let go of his arm and asked him to continue.
"There was a message… a video recording, I think," his voice hesitated over the strange words, and she looked up at him sharply, not certain it was something he had actually been taught in Gonasleng. "A man told us that we were being sent to the ground to discover if humans could survive there… There was something else about going to a mountain for supplies… I don't know. There was a lot going on. I was trying to figure out what was happening to me, Heda, where I was, but it was very confusing."
"It's alright, Aden, I think I mostly understand the rest," she reassured him, remembering her own earlier confusion.
"You said you just 'opened your eyes' and were in a different place… What were you doing in the Chamber? Did you fall asleep waiting for Titus?"
"No, Heda! Of course not," he said with a wounded tone, as though insulted by her suggestion. "I wasn't sure how long he would be, and I wanted to be ready. The Fleimkepa has told me I need more practice in calming my mind, so I decided to begin preparations without him… I wanted to be ready," he told her.
"You were meditating?" she asked.
"Sha, Heda."
Lexa didn't correct him on his use of their language, as her mind was now fully occupied by the new possibilities his story had created.
He was meditating… and in the Sacred Chamber, no less. That must be significant, I can feel it.
The more she learned, the more frustrated she became. There was simply no explanation that made sense for what had happened to them. She wondered again over her earlier suspicion that this was merely a very unusual, very difficult Trial of a type she had never before experienced, but again she had to dismiss the idea. Trials felt fundamentally different. This… whatever it was, felt as real and imperfect as anything she had ever experienced. A Trial would also not explain Aden's presence, as he was not the Commander, and therefore incapable of performing that duty yet.
Aden was watching her carefully, his face hopeful. He was still waiting for answers, she realized, though he was sadly going to be disappointed on that front, as she still had no real theories to give him.
"What about you, Heda?" he asked cautiously. "What was the last thing you remember?"
Glancing around one last time, seeing no one nearby, as the others were still lost in their rapture over their return to the ground, Lexa gave herself only a second to consider the wisdom of sharing everything with him, then decided to put her full trust in the boy. Taking a seat beside him on a moss covered log, she quickly told him in sparse, undescriptive words exactly what had happened to her, and how exactly, she had died.
"Heda…" he whispered, his eyes filling with tears. It saddened her to see the emotion in him at the news of her death, and Clarke's grieving face swam before her vision briefly, overlapping with his.
"What's done is done," she told him, ignoring the lump in her own throat, "Regrets over the past will not help us now in the present. We need to focus on making plans for how to proceed."
"But, Heda…" the boy persisted, his face still shocked, a note of fear in his voice. "If you have died, then Conclave…!" he trailed off, not finishing his thought.
But he didn't need to, she knew exactly what he was thinking.
"No, that's not what this is… Trust me Aden, this is not Conclave. You would remember the ceremony beginning, and my spirit would not be so confused as to not know it was time to choose the new Commander. The spirit world is quite different from this place, and a Conclave does not begin spontaneously upon my death, even if you were in the Sacred Chamber at the time… There are preparations that must be done first."
He calmed slightly at her words, but she didn't feel nearly as confident in her assertions as she had made it sound.
"So you still carry the Commander's Spirit, then?" he asked, more of a relieved statement of fact than anything else, but the question made her frown, a small knot of fear forming in her chest.
Lexa's right hand flew up to her neck, her fingers searching out the scar which must… must be there. Smooth skin met her touch, and a small part of her began to panic; the first real, true terror she had felt since her death rising along her spine, making her fingers shake and her stomach twist with sudden nausea.
It can't be…
She closed her eyes, calming her mind and reaching for that place within her, that warm, guiding flame that had always been there since the day of her Ascension… the familiar presence within.
Nothing. Just as there had been nothing since she awoke, she realized. Nothing but her own, strange voice speaking in words she didn't, shouldn't recognize, and faint new memories of a life among the stars.
"Aden," she said, and the boy's eyes widened at her tremulous tone. She swallowed harshly, turning her head away from him and showing him her neck.
"Aden, this is important. Look carefully… Is there a long, thin scar on the back of my neck, along the spine?" she asked. She felt him come closer, his hands helping to brush away some of the hair gathered there. She waited as he inspected the skin of her neck, hardly able to breathe through her growing fear.
"I don't think so…" he said, and her hands clenched on her thighs, fingers digging into flesh through the material of her pants.
"Wait, no, I do see a scar. It's… about a finger long?" he corrected himself a second later. "It's pretty faint, though, and thin… barely a scar at all. Hard to see, especially in this light."
Aden leaned away from her neck and Lexa let her hair fall back into place, her heart still racing in her chest as she tried to compose herself once more. She focused on taking deep breaths, somewhat reassured by Aden's confirmation that there was, indeed, still a scar in the proper place, though it was apparently much fainter and better healed than it had been before. It was impossible for her to feel completely put at ease by his discovery, however, because it still didn't explain the odd stillness she felt within her. The unusual lack of something which had been a part of her for so long now that she hardly remembered what it had been like before to live without it.
Why hadn't she noticed this sooner? There had been too much happening. She'd been distracted by her death, her confusion, and that other strange voice that seemed to be her own, whispering forbidden knowledge in her ear.
Lexa ignored Aden, though she knew he was watching her with concern. She centered herself, letting her body relax while at the same time, focusing her mind. She counted her breaths… In… Out… In… Out… Let herself fall inwards, searching… searching…
"Heda!" Aden's voice, raised in alarm, caused her eyes to fly open.
"Heda, you're bleeding!" he exclaimed, and she reached up, her hand coming away black with the blood that had been dripping from her nose. She stared at the dark blood for a moment, concerned, confused by her inability to connect with the spirit that lived within her…
… Then Lexa's head exploded in sharp pain, her eyes rolling backwards in her skull as she abruptly passed out.
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"You've done… what?" one of the Council member's asked, the shock clear in his voice.
"At zero seven hundred hours this morning, we launched a dropship with one hundred criminals on board to the surface of the planet," Jaha repeated, and in the silence that followed, Anya felt you could have heard a cockroach fart on the far side of the nuke-blasted planet below.
Goddamn it, Jaha, Anya thought. I should have known!
"Thelonious," Councilman Brenner said agreeably, "Surely you are joking… The planet won't be inhabitable for another four generations at least! You can't expect us to believe you would seriously send a hundred people down there, wasting a valuable dropship in the process?"
"I can, and I did," the Chancellor responded, and Anya's teeth clenched at his serene, unaffected tone. The man was becoming seriously more and more unhinged, she thought, her fists clenching unseen under the table.
"The Ark is dying, people," Jaha continued, "We all know this is true. We have only a few months of remaining oxygen, if we are lucky. If there was any chance the ground is safe for human life, we needed a way to find out, and removing a hundred people from the population now will at least buy us some more time."
"But, Chancellor… Its suicide! No one could possibly survive down there. Not with those levels of radiation."
"We can't know that," he replied sharply, "With the genetic modifications of the past three generations, it's possible the radiation levels will be tolerable. But we shall soon find out, one way or another. We will be monitoring them and their vital signs closely. If it is safe for human life down there, then the rest of us could be on the ground in a month!"
Silence fell over the room at these words, the faces of the men and women grave and concerned around her.
"Chancellor?" Anya began, being the first to break the silence, "You said you sent one hundred criminals… But what criminals do you speak of? The only prisoners on the Ark are minors under the age of eighteen."
Silence followed her words. All eyes in the room turned to Jaha.
"Yes," he agreed, "They are. And if they succeed in surviving on the ground, then they will be pardoned for their crimes when their cases are reviewed."
The room erupted into conversation at his words.
"You can't be serious! They're children, Jaha!"
"Many of them are good kids convicted of petty crimes, Chancellor. They would have been pardoned when they turned eighteen… You can't just send them down there to die!"
"Ladies and gentlemen, please!" Jaha interrupted, raising both his hands to quiet them. "It is already done. The dropship landed safely almost an hour ago. Those kids, as you call them, are convicted criminals, and they are already on the ground. Their sacrifice was necessary if the Ark was to survive. However," he continued, his tone softening, "I hope just as much as each and every one of you that they do not come to serious harm. I believe, and there is compelling evidence to support this, that the ground is livable right now. If I didn't, I would never have authorized this mission to go forward… Now. We must discuss how to handle the rumors that will no doubt be spreading, and make plans for how best to use the extra time the hundred have given us."
The rest of the meeting passed fairly quickly, the majority of the Council members easily intimidated by Chancellor Jaha and the incredibly high stakes of the current situation. There was no easier way to silence objections than to remind people that the only other option might be the extinction of the human race. Anya lingered as the others each stood and departed, though she yearned to rush from the room and confirm what her worst fears were telling her was true.
"One hundred souls," she said to Jaha once they were finally alone. "That's a great many. Enough to nearly empty all of the sky box prisons, I should think… Were you at least able to avoid sending the very young?"
He studied her for a moment before responding, and she feared she had given something away in asking the question.
"There were exactly one hundred seats on the dropship, so one hundred people had to go. It was difficult, but we managed to avoid sending anyone with any serious medical conditions. That was about the only consideration we were able to make, however."
Anya felt her chest tighten at his words though she forced herself not to visibly react, her heart telling her that what she feared had come to pass.
Aden was on that dropship, I'm sure of it.
Another thought occurred to her. "And your son, Wells?" she asked, not hiding her surprise.
Jaha didn't answer. He simply stared back at her, his brown eyes expressionless, and Anya knew. She wasn't sure if knowing that he had sent his own son down to the surface to die along with the others impressed or repulsed her, but she had to admire the strength of his convictions. Thelonious Jaha, she realized, was incapable of doing anything in half measures.
"Well, then… May God have mercy on your soul," she said, and walked from the room, leaving the Chancellor of the Ark alone behind her.