A/N: A short story for your reading pleasure with a little holiday spirit thrown in. For those who celebrate the holiday, I hope everyone is having a nice Christmas and will have a wonderful new year. Let's pray it is better than this past one. I do like reviews/comments. NC
Disclaimer: I do not own any part of SPN, and this is my own creation. Any errors are my own.
The clock seemed to move at half speed as Sam looked at it again for the sixth time. He was in his last class of the day and wanted to get back to his apartment to finish his term papers and projects so he could turn them in before Christmas break. It still awed him that he had gotten a full scholarship to Stanford and was going to go into their law program, if accepted, once he finished his first four years.
His life was going the way he wanted and improved even more when a year ago he had been introduced to the woman of his dreams, Jessica Moore. She was everything he could have wanted in a woman: witty, beautiful, intelligent, loving, compassionate, and always could make him smile. They had been living together for nearly six months and he could not have asked for a better life than he was living right now.
His only regret was that his brother wasn't sharing in his happiness. It was only their father, John, his brother, Dean, and him since his mother was killed in his nursey when he was six months old. When he had told his father he was leaving to go to college, he exploded and cussed him, telling him he was deserting his family and if he walked out that door to not ever come back. Dean had not said a word during their fight, so Sam thought he must agree with their dad. That just about broke him and the first year of college was rough. He mainly kept to himself and didn't try to make friends. Sam was more concerned about his studies than partying like a lot of his fellow classmates.
Sam's mind drifted and he wondered what Dean was doing right now. Was he on a hunt? Or maybe at Bobby's resting up and helping him? He just hoped Dean was being careful on hunts and not being reckless. That would get you hurt quicker than anything. He had picked up his cell numerous times and pulled Dean's name up to call him, but never did. He didn't know if Dean would even answer his call anyway. The other students started getting up and brought Sam out of his thoughts. He gathered his things and stuffed them in a pack before heading out the door to go to his apartment.
The walk across campus was nice and let Sam clear his head. Jessica had invited him to spend the holiday break with her family so he could meet them. Not having any other plans, he had agreed to it. Sam unlocked the door and stepped into the living room of their small apartment, stopping when he saw Jessica across the room putting out decorations.
"Hi Sam," she greeted him as she put the finishing touches on a two-foot tree that sat on top of the bookcase.
"What's this?" Sam asked dropping his pack on the couch and walking to her. He put his arm around her waist and kissed the side of head.
"I wanted to get us in the mood for Christmas. Mom sent these to me, and I thought it would be nice to decorate our first place."
Sam looked around the room and saw lights outlining the doorway to the kitchen and stockings with their names hung on the bookcase. The tree twinkled as the lights went on and off, softly glowing. There were even some small gifts already under the tree.
"This is nice," he told her.
"It's not much, but it's a start. I'm making cookies we can decorate too. There goes my timer," said Jessica stepping from his embrace to hurry to the kitchen.
Sam drew in a long breath and could smell the enticing aroma of the cookies. He smiled to himself as he plopped onto the couch and pulled his pack toward him to get out his schoolwork. He was tired and wished he could take a nap, but if he was going to finish everything, he would be pulling an all nighter again. Sam had not had much sleep the past couple of weeks with all the extra work given to them, working parttime, and tutoring a couple of fellow students. He liked being kept busy but was working too hard right now.
Sam opened his laptop and his textbooks to finish a paper for one of his classes. He still needed to finish the research on another project and outline a term paper to be turned in and approved. Jessica would make him stop long enough to eat something or he wouldn't have eaten. She took care of him when he was in full college mode and tuned everything else out.
"Okay, try one and see what you think," Jessica interrupted him holding out a napkin with a cookie on it. "It was too hot still to decorate so you get a bare one."
"Thanks," Sam replied taking the treat and biting off a bite. It was delicious and melted in his mouth. "These are the best Babe. I don't care if it's not decorated," he praised her.
"I'm going to do a few for some of our friends and hand the out tomorrow."
"They'll love them. You're always thinking of others."
"I bet you say that to all your conquests," she giggled.
"You're my only conquest and the only one I want."
"I love you Sam Winchester," Jessica sighed before leaning over the couch to kiss him.
"I love you too."
"Let me get you something to drink. Are you going to get everything done in time?" she asked glancing at the books, papers, and laptop on the coffee table.
"I think so," Sam replied. He took the drink she handed to him and kissed her hand. "You're too good to me, what would I ever do without you?"
"Oh, probably crash and burn," she shrugged. "I shall be in the kitchen if you need me. And Sam, remember to take short breaks so you don't get so tired and burned out."
"I will," Sam mumbled as he went back to his work.
spn
It was after midnight and Sam had fallen asleep on the couch. He had sent Jessica on to bed and exhaustion overtook him as he was completing the last paper. He was too tired to get up and had let his head fall back against the couch and fell into a deep sleep.
The shadow crept along the fire escape and to the window in the kitchen. A knife was used to jimmy the lock open, and the window was carefully raised, trying to make the least amount of noise so not to wake the ones inside. A dark figure shuffled into the living room and froze when he saw the sleeping body on the couch. He held his breath for a moment before letting it out painfully.
Dean looked at his brother with sadness in his eyes. It broke his heart when Sam left that night after the huge fight with their father. He was paralyzed with shock and couldn't make himself say anything to stop him or at least wish him good luck. Dean had known Sam wasn't into hunting like he was and if he was honest with himself, he saw it coming. What hurt was Sam not telling him about the scholarship and that he was leaving. He might have tried to stop him, but more than likely would have drove him to Stanford instead of him taking the bus. All that was in the past now and couldn't be changed. He had hunted with John for a while until he up and left without a word about where he was going or why. After that, Dean hunted on his own or helped other hunters he trusted.
After Sam had been gone six months, Dean made up an excuse to leave John and went to Stanford to see if he could find Sam. He wanted to be sure he was doing okay. Unfortunately, there were too many students for him to find his brother and he left disinherited with not seeing him.
The next time he snuck away, Dean had a better plan, he staked out the library, thinking Sam would be using it often. He found a place that would allow him to watch the entrance but stay hidden from those coming in. He waited less than an hour and there he was, Sammy, coming through the automatic doors. He had a bookbag slung over his shoulder and was with several other students, talking and laughing. Dean watched from afar, as his chest tightened, and that dull ache returned. He felt like a part of him was lost that night when Sam left, and he would never get it back. Once Sam was out of sight, Dean got up and walked away, giving Sam the space and distance, he wanted. He looked like he was doing okay and that's all Dean wanted to see.
Dean went back one more time to see Sam and decided he was going to talk to him this time. He lucked out and caught him coming across campus from the library and started walking toward him. He heard someone call out his brother's name and faltered in his steps when a cute, blonde girl ran to Sam and hugged him. Sam smiled warmly at her and kissed her before they walked away with their arms around each other. Dean's shoulders slumped as he turned to leave since it seemed Sam had found another life for himself and didn't need him anymore. The hollow empty feeling inside of him just got bigger.
Dean reached into his jacket pocket and removed a worn, wrinkled envelope and sat it under the small tree. He had been putting money back for Sam for the past year and wanted him to have it for Christmas. He looked at the photos sitting on the bookcase and studied the cute, blonde girl Sam had his arms around. He was happy for him. It looked like he was getting everything he wanted in life.
With one final look at his little brother, Dean walked unsteadily back the way he had come, clutching his wounded arm to his chest. He had thought about waking Sam to have him doctor his injuries, but after seeing the life he had, he didn't want to bring his drama into it. Dean was going to find a motel somewhere near and tend to it himself. He grimaced as he worked on climbing out the window and pushing it closed before heading down the fire escape to the Impala.
spn
Sam woke and groaned painfully as he rubbed his neck that was sore from the position, he had slept in. He looked at the clock and saw he needed to get a shower and grab breakfast before heading to his classes.
"Did you sleep out here last night?" Jessica inquired as she came from their bedroom.
"Yeah, guess I did," Sam grunted getting up and stretching. "I'm going to get a shower and I have one small thing to do before heading to class and I will be done."
"Thank goodness. I have missed your sexy body next to mine in bed."
"Me too," he mumbled kissing her deeply before heading to the bathroom.
"I'll fix you some breakfast before I head out. I want to catch our friends to give them the cookies," Jessica called to him.
"Okay. I'll see you later today. Wish them all Merry Christmas for me."
"Alright." Jessica busied herself with getting the food ready and packing the little bags of cookies. She left Sam's food in the oven to stay warm and when to play Santa with her friends before heading to her own classes.
Sam came out of the bedroom dressed for the day. He ran his fingers through his hair as he walked into the kitchen to see a note propped on his coffee cup from Jessica. He smiled as he read it and poured a cup of coffee before taking his plate from the oven. He sat at the bar and ate his food when a strange feeling came over him for a moment and then was gone. He shrugged it off as being over tired and finished his breakfast. With a second cup of coffee, Sam headed into the living room and put the final changes on his project before saving everything. He gathered his books and papers together and stuffed everything in his bag. The last thing he did before he left was turn off the lights on the tree but didn't notice the envelope with his name on it tucked under the branches.
spn
Sam walked with a lighter step as he came out of his last class. Everything had been turned in and the start of Christmas break was beginning the next day. He breathed a sigh of relief, feeling a huge burden had been lifted off his shoulders. He was going to stop by one of the stores on his way home and pick up one of Jessica's presents. He got her a silver necklace with her initials engraved on it.
After picking up the gift, Sam headed for the apartment hoping to beat her there so he could slip the gift under the tree.
"Jess, you home?" Sam called as he entered the apartment. When she didn't answer, he dropped his bag in the corner and took the gift out of his pocket. He slipped it under the tree and knocked the envelope off onto the floor. He reached down and picked it up, turning it over to see his name written on the front in a familiar handwriting.
Sam frowned as he stared at the wrinkled envelope for a moment, not understanding how it got there. He turned it over and became more concerned when he saw a smeared bloody fingerprint. He opened it and pulled out six one-hundred-dollar bills and a small note that said, 'Merry Christmas, Sammy.'
The front door opened, and Jessica came in to find Sam standing at the tree staring at what was in his hands. She walked over to him when she saw the puzzled and unsure look on his face.
"Sam is something wrong?" she questioned laying a hand on his arm.
"I don't know," Sam mumbled looking at the blood smear again. He looked on the floor and saw what looked like droplets of blood heading for the kitchen. He followed it to the window and saw a bloody handprint when he pushed the curtain aside.
"What's that?" Jessica asked from behind him when she saw the bloody handprint.
"Did you put this under the tree?" Sam asked holding up the envelope.
"No, I've not seen it before. Who is it from?"
"I think my brother," Sam answered looking up at her. "I think he's in trouble."
"You mean Dean? But what makes you think that and how did he get in here?"
"I've had this odd feeling since I woke up this morning that something was off. I don't know how to explain it. Dean and I sort of have this connection."
"Siblings that are close have that. Are you saying that is your brother's blood on the window?"
"Yes, and I need to ask a huge favor of you," Sam stated turning to grab Jessica on the shoulders. "And please no questions."
"Of course, Sam, anything for you."
"I need you to drive me to some motels nearby to see if my brother's car is there," Sam explained. "If I find it, I need you to go ahead and go see your parents tomorrow."
"I don't understand, Sam. Are you not coming?" Jessica asked in a soft voice.
"If I find my brother and he's okay, I'll come up later, hopefully before Christmas, but it might be after. I'll call or text you to let you know my plans. I can take a bus north and you can pick me up. When I left for college…Well, it wasn't a happy time and there were some…Disagreements between my Dad and me. I'm not sure how Dean felt about everything since he didn't say anything."
"My parents are going to be disappointed, but I'll explain you had a family matter to take care of. I know you haven't talked a lot about your brother, but I know you love him and miss him. You do what you need to do Babe, just know I'm here for you and will be waiting for you."
"Thanks, Jess. I'm glad you understand," Sam praised her pulling her into his embrace and kissing her. "Where's the phone book?" he asked after the kiss.
"Should be in the drawer in the kitchen, why?"
"I need to see what motels are close by. I want to narrow down where to look." Sam hurried into the kitchen and found the phone book looking in the yellow pages for motels so he could quickly scan through them. "Okay, I've got a starting point. Are you ready?"
"Yes Babe, I want to help you find your brother."
They headed out to Jessica's car and Sam directed her to the first motel he wanted to check out. He knew if Dean was hurt, he would find a place to lay low for a day or so until he healed enough to travel. He ignored the big chain ones, knowing Dean would want something cheap, out of the way, and inconspicuous.
spn
"Are you sure your brother is still around?" Jessica asked as she pulled from the third motel Sam had her stop at.
"There's only a couple more in this area to check Jess. I know this may seem crazy to you, but I know my brother and how he thinks. The next one is only a couple miles down the street."
"Okay Sam," Jessica nodded looking both ways before pulling out onto the road and heading for the next motel. The ones Sam had her checking were within a ten-mile radius of the college and low scale. She drove slowly with the traffic until the motel came into view and she signaled her intend to turn into the parking lot.
"Drive around back," Sam told her as he craned his neck to see. He sucked in a breath when he saw a black Impala sitting at the back of the lot. "Pull over by the Impala," Sam instructed as he edged forward trying to determine if it was Dean's Baby. When Jessica stopped, Sam jumped out and went to the Impala, cupping his hand to look inside. He saw a box of eight track tapes sticking out from under the front seat and moved to the back fender to feel for a spare key. He smiled when he pulled it out and thought it was a treasure. "Jess, my brother is in one of these rooms and I need to check on him. You go on back to the apartment and I'll call you if I'm going to be able to go with you."
"Alright Babe, if you need me to come back and get you, you better call me. I'd like to meet your brother sometime, but only when you want me to."
"I will, I'll be okay," Sam assured her. He leaned over and gently kissed her, rubbing a thumb over her cheek before stepping back so she could drive away. He gave her a final wave and turned to look at the rooms in front of him. The Impala was parked in front of the corner room, but that didn't mean that was Dean's room. He couldn't go to the office since he didn't know what alias Dean might be using. Deciding the best thing to do was knock on the door, if it wasn't Dean, he'd apologize and try another room.
Sam went to the corner room and knocked and listened for movement inside. He didn't hear anything and tried again but still there was no answer. He stepped to the room below it and knocked but a stranger answered, and he apologized for disturbing him.
Sam stepped back and looked at the corner room again. An idea came to mind, and he went to the Impala to open the trunk to see if he could find something to pick the lock. He was surprised when he found a small pack that had things he had left behind when went to college. It looked like Dean had gathered them and kept them safe for him. Sam blinked the tears away and pulled out his lock pick kit.
After knocking one more time and still not getting an answer, Sam looked around to be sure no one was around before leaning over and picking the lock for the door. He carefully pushed it open and eased in being careful about walking unannounced into hunter's room. The room was dark with the curtains closed and once his eyes adjusted to the dimness of the lightening, Sam looked around and saw an empty bed. He let his gaze move on around the room and saw a body lying in the bathroom doorway.
"Dean," Sam cried softly as he rushed to his side. He found Dean on his stomach and couldn't tell if he was breathing or not. "Oh man Dean," he breathed out, reaching to feel for a pulse. His fingers were shaking as he pressed into Dean's neck and strained to find a beat but finally did. It was weak, but there. He saw the makeshift bandage on his arm and a haphazard one partly hanging on his shoulder.
Dean's face was flushed, and his cheeks were pinkish with fever. Sam moved him to his side to help with his breathing and felt his forehead feeling the heat coming off him. His T-shirt was soaked in sweat and his breathing was labored.
Dean's eyes fluttered open for a moment and Sam got in his line of sight.
"Wish…were…really here," Dean gasped in a strained voice and then fell into the abyss once again as he eyes rolled upward and shut.
"I am Dean, I'm here bro," Sam mumbled cupping his face for a moment. He looked to the bed and down at Dean's body trying to decide the best option. Sam went to the bed and threw the covers to the foot of it out of the way. He went into the bathroom, washed his hands and grabbed what towels were in there, wetting the washcloths to use.
The first thing he needed to do was put a towel on the bed before getting Dean's limp body on it. He was careful of his injuries as he grabbed Dean under the arms and slid him to the bed. He grunted as he maneuvered Dean's upper body onto the bed and bent to get his legs on the mattress. With that done, he moved him on his side so he could remove the dressing Dean had applied and check out his injuries. Sam grimaced in disgust when he pulled the one off his shoulder. He could tell it was infected and took the wet cloth to clean the dried blood from around the wounds. He didn't know what Dean had tangled with but knew some of their claws could easily cause infection or worse, if not cleaned properly.
Dean's body jerked and trembled under his hands, and he moaned in pain, as Sam tried to assess how bad the gashes were. He was going to remove the uneven, crude stitches Dean had put in his arm and clean it better. Sam fell back into the routine of patching his brother as he cleaned the blood away, opened the infected one to drain, cleaned the wounds, and got out sutures to sew the gashes. He pinched Dean's skin together and made small, neat, stitches closing the wounds. When he was done stitching Dean's injuries, Sam smeared antibiotic cream over the closed gashes and taped pads in place to protect them.
After cleaning up, Sam rummaged through Dean's bag to get out sleep pants and took off his boots and jeans to slip them up his legs and settle over his hips. He pulled the covers over Dean's body and covered him, tucking the blankets around him. He added the extra one from the closet hoping to keep him warm. He sat back in a chair that he pulled close to the bed and wiped a hand down his tired face. Dean still hadn't come around again and that worried him. He had lost a lot of blood and probably needed fluids.
Sam knew he needed to get some meds into Dean to help bring down his temperature and looked in his duffle for the extra strength Tylenol. After shaking three out, he found a knife and smashed them up before pouring the crushed pills into a glass and adding a little water. Sam stirred it until it was mostly dissolved and sat it on the nightstand so he could grab a hand towel from the bathroom.
"Hey bro, think you can wake up enough to take some meds?" Sam cooed to Dean as he slipped an arm under his shoulders to raise him up from the bed. "Dean, come on, come back to me," Sam begged, tapping his hot cheeks trying to get some response. "You need to swallow," Sam told him when Dean rolled his head slightly and wrinkled his face. Sam held the glass to his lips and carefully dribbled the water into his mouth. "Swallow Dean," Sam said again rubbing his throat. "That's it," Sam praised Dean as most of the doctored liquid was swallowed. He wiped away what dripped from the corner of his mouth and laid him back on the pillow.
As time passed, Sam kept cold compresses on Dean's forehead and wiped his face with a cold cloth. Dean mumbled and rolled his head but never came to. He thought he heard his name once and wondered what he was dreaming about. It didn't seem peaceful or happy from the expressions on his face. Sam smashed more pills and got Dean to swallow the liquid with little persuasion.
"Hey, it's okay, I'm here," Sam whispered to his brother as he wiped his face. "I've got you bro." He got up and stretched before going to the bathroom to wet the cloths again to use. He was tired but wouldn't let himself rest for fear Dean might need him. Sam wanted to take Dean to his apartment when he was sure Jessica had left for her parents. He knew Jessica would help him and help Dean if he'd let her.
Sam never really talked about Dean to Jessica. He had only told her he had a brother, and they were on the outs with each other because of his decision to go to college. Sam didn't want Jessica to see Dean like this and have to explain his injuries. He didn't want to lie to her and decided it would be better they didn't meet yet. He was going to text her around six, since she was heading out at seven, to let her know he wouldn't make it but hoped to see her after Christmas.
spn
Sam's eyes grew heavy as he tried to keep them open so he could keep an eye on his brother. He changed out the cloth on his forehead and wiped the sweat from his face and neck. Dean had opened his eyes a couple of times, but they were unfocused and glazed. He was sure he didn't see him or even know he was there. He thought the fever was making him delusional because Dean kept saying, 'S'mmy, I'm sorry,' but Sam wasn't sure what he meant.
The night seemed to drag out but finally Sam saw it was a little after six and sent Jessica a text that he wouldn't make it back to go with her. He told her to be careful on her drive home and he would text her if he could make it. He said how sorry he was, but his brother needed him. Sam waited for an answer and looked at his cell when it pinged, he had a message. He pulled it up and smiled when he read it. Jessica understood and hoped his brother would be okay. She said her parents would understand, that family came first, and she wanted Sam to call her later when he could. He sent a quick text back telling her how much he loved her for understanding.
After putting his cell away, Sam began packing Dean's things so they could leave soon. He would give Jessica a couple of hours to be sure she was gone. After checking on Dean once again, he went out to the vending machines and got some crackers and a couple of Gatorades since he hadn't had anything to eat since yesterday before noon when he grabbed a quick ham rollup on campus. He went back to the room and was going to see if Dean could drink some Gatorade.
Sam let himself back into the room and found Dean trying to stand by the side of the bed. He rushed to his side, dropping the items on the bed and catching Dean before he face planted on the floor. He made out a mumbled 'bathroom' from Dean and shuffled them that way, taking most of Dean's weight. He got him on the commode and gave him some privacy to do his business. When he was done, Sam wrestled him back to bed and got him tucked in.
"Think you can drink a little something Dean? You need the fluids," Sam spoke to his brother as he opened a Gatorade and held it to his lips. "That's it, nice and slow," Sam encouraged as Dean swallowed several times before coughing. "We'll try some more later, you need to rest." Sam sat the drink aside and felt Dean's forehead thinking it didn't feel quite as hot, but he still had a fever. He peeled back the pads to be sure the gash hadn't got infected again. He was pleased that it seemed to be healing. He leaned back and opened his crackers to munch on them and drink his Gatorade while he waited.
spn
Enough time had passed, and Sam packed the Impala and checked the room once more to be sure he had everything before going to the bed to get Dean up and into the car. He threw the covers back and looked at him for a moment, thinking this was not how he wanted their reunion to go.
"Hey, Dean, hey, I'm going to get you up so we can go to my place," Sam explained to him as he moved his body to sit on the side of the bed with him supporting it. "Dean, can you hear me?" he asked tapping his cheeks and getting a moan out of him. "We're going to move now." Sam grunted as he got his arm around Dean's body and hefted him to his wobbly feet. Dean wasn't helping him much as Sam drug him across the room to the door and shifted Dean so he could get it opened. He glanced around and didn't see anyone before moving them outside and to the Impala. He had the door unlocked on the passenger side and eased Dean into the seat, picking his feet up and placing them in the wheel well.
Sam walked around the car and dropped into the driver's seat, pausing as he let memories flood his mind. He ran a hand lovingly over the steering wheel and smiled softly.
"I've missed you Baby," Sam whispered before cranking her. He listened to the engine roar to life and settle in a deep rumble, almost purr as if it knew her charge was back. After letting it idle for a few minutes, Sam pulled from the parking lot and headed for his apartment. He looked over at Dean as his head rolled gently back and forth with the motion of the car.
The campus traffic was light since everyone had headed out for the Christmas break. He knew most of the residents in his apartment building were leaving so he wouldn't have to deal with curious looks or asked questions he couldn't answer. Sam parked as close to the side door of the apartment building and looked around seeing the lots were almost empty. He got out and decided to take Dean's bags upstairs first and open the door before getting Dean out. Sam rushed up the stairs to the second floor and hurried to his door, fumbling with the key for a moment before getting it unlocked.
He stepped into the living room and looked around to be sure Jessica was gone before heading to the bedroom to drop the bags off. Sam turned the bed down and headed back outside to get his brother. He got him out of the car and into the building, pausing at the stairs to look up them. Deciding the best way to get him up them since he was still out of it was carry him. Sam hefted Dean over his shoulder in a fireman's hold and started up them, being careful to not get unbalanced and fall. He thought Dean had lost weight since the last time he had seen him. When he got Dean into his apartment, he took him to the bedroom and placed him on the bed. He covered him when Dean started to shiver uncontrollably, adding an afghan for extra warmth. He checked the pads to be sure there was no blood and figured he'd let Dean settle before changing the dressing. He looked around for a moment deciding what to do first.
After getting some clean clothes, Sam headed into the bathroom for a quick shower. He was still exhausted and worried about Dean but at least he felt clean as he stepped from the bathroom. Sam dropped his dirty clothes into the hamper and went to check on Dean. He wiped his face with a cool cloth and straightened the covers that he had tossed off him.
"You're due more meds," Sam commented as he pressed his hand to Dean's forehead. He didn't like he was still running a fever but hoped it would break soon. "I'll be back in a minute." Sam walked into the kitchen to see a note from Jessica on the table. She figured Sam might bring Dean back to the apartment and had bought some extra food for them. He huffed in relief and glanced in the fridge to see the additional items there. "I love you so much," Sam mumbled to himself. He got the Tylenol bottle from his jacket and shook out more pills so he could crush them and put them in a glass with water for Dean. He headed back to the bedroom to give him the medicine. "Here we go, just like before bro, you need to swallow," Sam instructed him raising him up enough to drink the spiked water.
Dean frowned and grumbled as he tried to pull himself out of the darkness. He could hear someone talking to him that sounded familiar, but it kept escaping him. He knew when liquid was fed to him that had a bitter taste, but he swallowed it anyway. Something cold was wiped across his face helping to cool him slightly. His lips were chapped, and he felt parched, but couldn't relay his discomfort. Whatever he was lying on was comfortable and fresh smelling. Dean drifted off again before he could fully wake wanting to be cocooned in the warmth and safety that he felt there.
After Dean settled and seemed to be resting easier now, Sam took his duffle and dumped it out on the other side of the bed to try and see what was dirty. It was hard to tell, so he gathered all Dean's clothes into a basket and went to the laundry room to throw them in to wash. With that done, Sam headed back upstairs and pulled out a small salad to eat to curb his appetite. It didn't take him long to finish it and rinsed the bowl leaving it in the sink to wash later. He checked the cabinet to be sure there was some soup thinking when Dean woke, he could fix him some.
Sam turned on the lights to the small tree and watched them begin to blink on and off, casting off soft colored glows around it. Christmas Eve was tomorrow, and he hoped Dean's fever would break before Christmas. It would be nice to spend this Christmas with his brother. He headed back to the bedroom to sit with Dean and watch over him. Sam got him awake enough to go to the bathroom before settling him for the night. He got more fluids and a little broth into him and was hurt and sad when Dean still thought he was imaging Sam being there. He didn't think he was real.
spn
It was early Christmas Eve morning when Dean began to pull himself from the darkness. He pried his eyes open and tried to see but his vision was still blurry. He moved his left shoulder and grimaced as pain ran down his arm and across his back. He wiped his right hand across his eyes and blinked rapidly and wrinkled his face as the cloudiness finally went away. He let his eyes roam the room and knew this wasn't a motel room; it was too clean and homely looking.
When Dean looked toward the noise beside the bed, he saw the outline of someone he knew. There was no way it could be anyone else but his little brother. The lamp on the nightstand gave off just enough light for him to see Sam's sleeping face that was leaned forward with his chin resting on his chest. Dean rubbed his eyes and looked again to be sure he wasn't imaging Sam sleeping beside the bed.
"S'mmy," Dean rasped out, cleared his throat, and tried again. "S'mmy, wake up."
Sam snorted and groaned in pain, rubbing his neck that was stiff and aching. He smacked his lips and looked toward the bed to see weak green eyes looking at him.
"Dean," Sam whispered as he moved to sit on the bed to be nearer to him.
"So, you are real," Dean surmised in a shaky voice.
"Yeah, I am, boy am I glad you're finally awake," Sam rushed grabbing Dean's hand and squeezing it as he grinned at him. He wanted to grab him in a huge hug but thought better with his injuries and not sure yet how Dean felt about him.
"Where am I?" he asked looking around again.
"My apartment. I tracked you down after finding the envelope with the money in it. You were passed out on the bathroom floor in that motel room. I got you on the bed and redressed your injuries. One was infected and you had a high fever." Sam reached and felt Dean's forehead and cheeks, thankful that most of the heat was gone. He still felt a little warm but nothing like he did.
"Where's your girl?" Dean asked.
"She's gone to her parents for Christmas. Wait, how did you know about Jess?" Sam inquired with interest.
"I saw you with her a while back," Dean shrugged looking away not wanting to tell Sam he was spying on him.
Sam frowned and let that sink in for a moment before continuing.
"Before you give me the third degree, you think…How 'bout a little help to the bathroom?" Dean asked begrudgingly. He hated to look weak, especially in front of his brother.
"Sure, no problem. Let me help you up," Sam quickly replied as he gave Dean a hand to stand. When he seemed stable, Sam moved them to the bathroom and stepped out to give Dean some privacy. He waited outside the door, listening to be sure he didn't fall. After a bit, he heard the water running and waited for Dean to come out. "Okay, let's get you back in bed," said Sam slipping his arm around Dean's waist to help him back to the bedroom. He got him comfortable and fixed the pillows so Dean could sit up and they could talk.
"If you were here, why didn't you let me know? And why didn't you let me know you had been hurt the other night so I could have helped you?" Sam chastised him.
"You looked happy, and I didn't want to bring my drama on you. I figured you found what you wanted, a new life," Dean answered, looking away so Sam wouldn't see the sad, hurt look in his eyes.
"I never wanted a life without my brother," Sam whispered. "I was going to call you so many times but chickened out. I wasn't sure you would answer the call. I didn't know how you felt after…"
"Yeah, me too," Dean sighed. "I should have reached out and not let this silent treatment go on this long."
"I missed you so much," Sam cried softly before wrapping his arms around his brother, being careful of his shoulder and arm. "I'm glad you're here," Sam told him in a sincere voice.
Dean tensed at first when Sam wrapped his arms around him and melted when he heard his words. He hugged him back as good as he could and tried to hold back the tears that threatened to fall. A warm feeling bloomed in his chest and that hollowness seemed to fill. He felt whole again and let Sam continue to hug him, feeling his tears fall on his neck.
"I missed you too Sammy," Dean whispered in his ear. "More than you'll ever know."
Sam let go and wiped his face before handing Dean the remote for the small television that sat on the dresser. He was brimming with happiness to know Dean still cared about him. This Christmas, he got his wish to be with his brother. Sam settled beside his brother on the bed basking in the happiness that was flowing off him.
"I think Die Hard is on if you want to watch it," Sam told him.
"Hell yeah, can't forget about family tradition, now, can we?" Dean agreed, smiling at his brother's happy face. He handed him the remote so he could find the program before moving slightly to get comfortable and to press his body against Sam's wanting to be sure he was not dreaming, and this was real.
"Merry Christmas Dean," Sam said. He flipped through the channels until he found the movie just getting ready to start.
"Merry Christmas Sammy," Dean replied thinking it was a merry one after all. Partway through the movie, Dean drifted to sleep, leaning into his brother feeling happy, safe, and whole.
The End