As soon as Deacon has left, Rayna starts looking around the room. She feels like she's in a life-size version of Spot the Difference.
There are two guitars in the corner that aren't supposed to be there, but what draws her attention is the set of picture frames hanging on the wall in place of the usual paintings of the girls. She recognizes a few older photos of her and Deacon, one at the Bluebird, a couple in their first apartment. There's even one of them with Vince in a tour bus. There's a whole bunch of snaphots, though, she has never seen; them and the girls at the cabin, Deacon carrying Maddie on his shoulders at the beach, Deacon kissing baby Daphne's head while Rayna is holding her.
It's like someone had gotten into her head, had taken pics of the daydreams she sometimes allows herself to have – the ones she shouldn't have – and had printed them.
It's more than a little disturbing.
Something occurs to her then, and she runs to the walk-in closet. She grabs the step stool and climbs on it to reach the highest shelf. She pulls out a dark grey box, opens the lid, rummages through it, but... it's not there.
The paternity test.
As she puts the box back in its spot and climbs down the stool, she notices there's only denim and flannel on what is supposed to be Teddy's side of the closet.
What is happening?
Well, at this point she thinks she understands what is happening, so the true question is, how in the hell is it possible? It feels too real to be some sort of hallucination.
Whatever it is, though, she decides she won't find answers hiding in the bedroom.
She changes into a pair of jeans and a sweatshirt, and she pulls her hair into a side ponytail. Before walking out the door to head downstairs, she stops in front of the pictures and looks at them one more time.
Just to be sure.
—
She casts a glance inside some of the rooms as she crosses the hallway, and everything looks mostly the same, so... there's that.
When she gets to the first floor, there's a yellow lab waiting at the bottom of the staircase and staring up at her. That is new. And the dog doesn't seem to recognize her either as he starts to bark.
Deacon comes rushing from the kitchen. "Sue! What is going on with you?" At the sound of Deacon's voice, the dog sits and gets quiet but still keeps a wary eye on Rayna. "I think he needs to go outside." He? Sue is a... oh, of course he's a boy. This makes Rayna smile. She can guess who picked his name. "Hey, baby, are you feeling better?" Deacon asks her then.
"Yeah," Rayna lies.
"There are pancakes waiting for you if you want. I'm just going to get Sue outside real quick, and I'll back, okay?"
She nods, and he gives her a brief kiss. His lips taste of cinammon spiced coffee, and she has no idea what gets into her – except that she wants to – but before he has time to leave, she stops him. She pulls him to her and kisses him, a real kiss, a kiss that brings back a flood of sensations she'd forgotten about, and she feels submerged all of a sudden. She has to pull back or she's going to get dizzy.
Deacon, as for him, is grinning. "You are feeling better."
She has to disagree. If anything, she thinks she's getting worse; she's starting to give in to this hallucination or whatever this is.
Goodness gracious.
—
Maddie and Daphne are sitting at the counter, bickering, when Rayna enters the kitchen. "Hey, hey, hey," she intervenes. "What's going on here?"
"Daph says the Christmas pancakes taste different than the regular pancakes."
These girls who call Deacon Dad look like her daughters, talk like her daughters, act like her daughters. It's unsettling. For a second, Rayna almost forgets about the current situation.
"Actually, there is a secret ingredient," she lets it slip. She knows that because Deacon used to make tree-shaped pancakes every Christmas. It was their tradition.
Daphne gives Maddie a triumphant look, like it was a contest and she just won. "Told you."
"What's the secret ingredient?" Maddie asks.
"I don't know. Deacon—" Rayna starts, but she corrects herself, "Dad always refused to tell me."
"And he never will," Deacon chimes in as he comes back from outside, Sue on his heels. The dog is still eyeing Rayna like she's some kind of intruder, and the irony isn't lost on her that the only living being in this house who seems aware something is wrong is the one she can't talk with.
Deacon gives Maddie and Daphne a kiss on the head, then, before he walks around the counter to join her, and Rayna is sure she forgets to breathe for a good ten seconds.
It hadn't fully hit her earlier when she'd first seen him with the girls because she'd been too shocked and too focused on trying to understand what was happening, but now... She had tried to imagine what it would be like to raise Maddie up with him so many times. She had cried herself to sleep about that for a year she wanted it so bad. And now... now she gets to experience it. And it feels so... natural.
She listens to Deacon chat back and forth with the girls, before he tells them, "Since we don't have to be at Aunt Tandy and Uncle Bucky's until five, we've got the whole day ahead of us. Any idea what y'all want to do?"
Rayna is trying not to appear baffled at everything anymore, but... Aunt Tandy and Uncle Bucky?! When did that happen?
"Daph and I need to rehearse for the thing first," Maddie says.
"Which thing?" Deacon asks, obviously only pretending not to know.
"Dad," his daughter complains with an exaggerated sigh, "you know, the surprise thing."
"Oh, the surprise thing," he plays along, amused.
Maddie then hops down from her kitchen stool. She helps Daphne do the same, and she grabs her little sister's hand as the two of them scurry off upstairs.
When they're gone, Deacon turns to Rayna, and he makes her sit. "We still need to talk about earlier, baby. What happened? You scared the hell out of me."
She hesitates for the longest time, but she settles for an answer that isn't a complete lie. "I wasn't feeling entirely like myself."
"You've been working too much, Ray. Since we got back from the tour, you haven't had a minute for yourself, and you—"
They're interrupted by high-pitched screams coming from upstairs. Rayna doesn't even have to look at Deacon, they both take off running at the same time. They almost trip over each other in their hurry to get to Maddie's room.
When they arrive, though, the girls aren't in any kind of danger. They're standing in front of the window, staring outside.
Daphne turns to them. "It's snowing!" she squeals with a level of excitement that no amount of sugar will ever get her to. Rayna feels the tension drain out of her, and she hears Deacon breathe a sigh of relief.
He smiles. "I guess Noelle was right," he tells Rayna.
"Who?"
"Noelle, the woman we talked to last night when we were waiting for the car? You said you wished it would snow because it would make the girls so happy, and she said you never know, sometimes wishes do come true. Don't you remember?"
"I remember."
She remembers. She remembers.
Except it's not how it happened. She was alone. She was alone because she'd left Edgehill's party after a huge fight with Teddy. Deacon was at the party, and seeing him there doing so well, she'd mused that maybe it was time. Deacon had been sober eight years, maybe it was time to tell him about Maddie. Teddy had accused her of doing the same thing every year, getting all wistful because of the holidays and wanting to tell Deacon.
She was waiting outside, alone, when that woman had asked her what was wrong. Rayna had confessed she'd wished she'd made different choices, and the woman had said... you never know, sometimes wishes do come true.
It can't be a coincidence.
—
TBC