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A Blessing in Disguise
Ch 5- Now That I've Found You.
Tobias P.O.V.
The orange light that streams through the window wakes me from the deepest and most comfortable slumber I have had in years. Especially having Tris in my arms, I never thought in a million years I would have this, her. For the first time in a long time I had none of the nightmares that terrorize me. You would think, I would at least say four years, but we all know that wouldn't be true. Not when prior to those four years living on the streets I had spent it always half away, ready to be beaten or thrown into the closet for so much as breathing. I always felt like I had to sleep with one eye open, so to speak. It was always worse if I didn't see Marcus coming.
Even though it has been four years since I didn't have to fear his attacks at night, I still had to sleep with one eye open. Paranoia grew, never trusting those around me or those that maybe just passing through to leave me untouched. When Zeke and Uriah both told me about this place, I thought at first it was too good to be true. But that all changed the minute I realized the name on the door, and the petite blonde girl greeting my two, and only, friends. That moment when our gaze connected, it was like I was finally home. Somehow, some way we both found each other again.
Mr. Prior, Andrew, told me that he would help me reclaim my identity. Seeing that I am now considered to be an adult, he will help me with getting both my birth certificate and social security card. He also informed me that he is well committed in making sure Marcus Eaton will not be a problem for me in the future. If needed we can file a restraining order, and if I feel the need to pursue charges, he will be more than happy to represent me. Overall, he feels Marcus will not be a problem, seeing at his age jail won't seem too appealing to him. I admit I like the thought of seeing Marcus behind bars, where he should be.
Zeke and Uriah's case is more complicated, of course, because Zeke was eighteen years old when he took Uriah and ran away. Even though he did with the best intentions for his brother, in the eye of the law, he could be charged with kidnapping. But I have no doubt that Andrew will do everything and anything to keep Zeke from going to jail. Andrew has already started to work on some depositions, and even discoveries that there is some hopeful information that could help in Zeke's case. I was pleased to hear that our lives could be reclaimed again.
Last night after dinner, Tris asked me to walk her home. Of course it wasn't just to walk her home, but to stick around for awhile to catch up, and then maybe even watch a movie afterwards. I didn't hesitate to accept her offer, because the truth is, I can't seem to stay away from her now that we are here together again. How I longed for the moment to be with her, to touch her, kiss her, to have anything with her, just one last time. I'm hoping with Andrew's help, this will be the first of many nights to come that we spend together.
We talked mindlessly on the short walk together. She told me all about the center and how it came to be. I was moved when she told me that I inspired the opening. She explained to me that when I left, she did eventually cave in, and told her mother about me running away. Although she did swear to me that she never told her mother the reason I left. But it seemed Natalie had her suspicions about the cause. After that, they volunteered at many places in hopes of finding me. That statement alone left me totally speechless.
All this time, I thought the day I left home was the day that their love for me ended. It turns out I couldn't have been more wrong, it never stopped. Tris and her parents looked for me everywhere, and when that didn't work, they opened a center to help those in the same situation as me. Incredibly, they ended up helping countless number of them, but they never stopped looking for me while doing so.
Tris' place, although small, really blew me away. It amazes me how far she has come. I couldn't help but stare at all the pictures around her place. There were frames that were filled with her family, her new friends, and even me; it was such a pleasure to see. I think I was really worried that when we parted ways, that apart of her would shrivel up and die, like a part of me did that day. But instead her life has been fulfilled and meaningful since I left. She took my life experiences and turned them into a passion for herself. She explained that she would do anything if it meant keeping someone from going through what I did. Even if it meant Tris would spend hours comforting a family, or doing group sessions... She figured one suffering was one too many. I swear as Tris was telling me about herself and the past four years, I found it harder and harder not to kiss her, to have her in my arms, to admire the woman that she has become, the woman I knew she could be. Tris has always been such a selfless, caring person. It doesn't surprise me in the least that this is what she has done with her life.
"So I have to ask. 'Tris?' What happened to Beatrice?" I asked with a chuckle. I wasn't sure if she wanted me to start calling her Tris, or continue calling her Beatrice. I noticed even her parents have taken to calling her Tris.
"Yeah, it is all Thanks to my best friend, Christina," she began explaining. I hated the title best friend ― that she gave to someone else, someone who wasn't me. "She said that Beatrice didn't suit me, that it was too long and boring of a name to fit me..." Well the girl wasn't wrong about that. Although I loved her, the name Beatrice always did sound more like a librarian's name, and believe me, Tris is no librarian.
"So should I call you Tris, then, or am I the special one that gets to only call you Beatrice?" I asked. I didn't care either way, she would always be my Beatrice.
"Maybe Beatrice, only on special occasions like birthdays and holidays," she suggested. Suddenly I was filled with the hope of tomorrow. She said birthdays and holidays... plural.
"What about you, Four?" she asked, chuckling. I admit I laughed with her, I couldn't help it.
"Yeah, a nickname... I just had this habit of doing things in fours, it kinda stuck." I continued to explain how four was the maximum number of minutes I would shower, or the miles I would run, or the days we would stay in one place.
"So should I call you Four, then?" she asked, smiling. I had always loved her smile.
"No. I like hearing you say my name." It was the truth, hearing the nickname Four from her lips just didn't feel right. To her no matter what, I would always be Tobias. Her Tobias.
Tris did ask me what life was like on the streets these past four years. Although I didn't feel the need nor the desire to lie to Tris... I did decide to leave out some of the harsher details. She didn't need to know all the details of my time living on the streets, I'm sure she could imagine it, if she really wanted to. But she listened... I was very grateful but not surprised in the least that she made no judgments when I told her most of my story. That's one more thing I had always loved about this girl next to me: she never looked at me like I was a kicked puppy. Not when Marcus would beat me to a pulp, not when I was feeling down and tears fell down my face, and not now, when I had told her about my time on the streets. Especially when she heard all about the unbelievable things that I have done to get some food in my mouth, or the crazy places I would find to sleep.
It took me hours of talking and two episodes of the new profound show Tris has come to love before I managed to muster up the courage to ask her about her romantic life. I didn't want to hear that some guy had stepped up and taken my place in her life. Although yes, we were never technically together, I still felt jealousy at the thought of someone else getting to touch her, kiss her, and possibly having the chance to make love to her.
Suddenly, I wanted nothing more than for the earth to open up from underneath me, and swallow me whole. I hated the thought that someone took her virginity, that they were able to hopefully cherish, and love parts of her I never could. Here I sat at almost twenty one years of age, and still a virgin.
"I um... went on a couple of dates but... nothing serious every happened. I just figured that I wasn't meant for the dating world," she explained, looking down at her hands. Then she said the unexpected. "But I think it was mostly because they weren't you," she said. I could see the blush raising in her cheeks as she spoke those words.
In that moment there was nothing else left to say. I had always known I was hers, just like she had always known she was mine.
I reached out lifting her chin with my right hand, wanting her to look at me. When our heated gaze met, it felt as if we were magnets, being drawn to each other. A force that drew us closer to each other, although I didn't want to fight the force... I also knew I couldn't if I tried. Our lips meet in the middle, as I realized she too, leaned in towards me. She wanted this just as badly as I did. Our lips meet, grazing, and testing each other at first, and when we parted, our gaze only felt that much more intense. I couldn't resist any longer, as our lips seemed to have a mind of their own, crashing into each other. Suddenly she was no longer sitting next to me, but instead on my lap straddling me. My arms wrapped around her waist, caressing her back. It felt like hours had passed before we would let the other breathe. We couldn't get enough of each other, it was as we were making up for lost time. We finally fell asleep in each other's arms on the couch. Her lips were swollen from my attack, and mine were just as swollen from hers.
It has been less than twenty four hours and I already know I won't be able to let her go, not again. I will do everything I have to in order to be with her. I will face all my demons, as long as I have her by my side.
"Good morning." Tris says, stirring in my arms. I wish last night would never end, but I know we need to get going, more than likely to help out in the kitchen.
"Good morning." I smile at her grogginess. I could get used to having this everyday. Seeing her every morning, feeling her wake up in my arms. I can't help but tighten my arms around her.
"Mmm, you know a girl could get used to this," she says, I can hear the smile in her voice. She really means it.
"Me, too."
"I don't..." she begins, but she stops herself looking down at my shirt.
"You don't what?" I ask, suddenly worried that she regrets last night. Maybe I pushed too far. Maybe she really didn't want to kiss me.
"I don't want you to go back to the center," she finally says. My stomach instantly drops, she doesn't want me after all. "No, Tobias, that's not what I mean," she says. She places her hand flat on my chest, signaling me to let her explain. "I was trying to say that... I don't want you to go back to the center, I want... I want you to stay here," she says. I instantly begin to process her words. She doesn't want me at the center, because she wants me here with her. Is she asking me what I think she is asking me?
"Tris?" I begin to ask... but, stubborn as always, she needs to explain more of herself.
"Tobias, I want you, all of you. I know me asking you to move in is speeding things up... but I don't want to be apart from you, not again," she continues. If she would shut up for two seconds... Then I get an idea. I lift her chin, almost forcefully, as I crush my lips against hers, getting her to shut up and listen to me. I pour all my feelings into this kiss, the love, the passion, the sleepless nights, the pain of being separated from her. I let the passion take us over, as my lips answer her question. No matter what, she is my home.
The center is buzzing as the kitchen fills with residents. Natalie is finishing up the mashed potato casserole, as Susan is working on the sweet potato casserole. I am amazed at this organized chaos. Andrew is setting the table while asking Zeke and Uriah to start opening other tables and begin to dress them as well.
"Why are there additional tables? Isn't there enough space at the regular table?" I ask. I recall last night's dinner. There was enough room for all of us; in fact, no one was squished at all.
"It's Thanksgiving. People that don't have places to go are more than welcome to join us. Even those that used to live here, or some of Tris' friends have a tendency to drop in. We never turn anyone away. So in that case, we set up more places for them," Natalie explains. I nod, that makes sense.
"I brought pie!" I hear from the doorway of the kitchen. I look up to see a girl of average height with black hair, smiling at everyone in the room. I later find out her name is Christina, who happens to be Tris' best friend. Although it still stings to hear that Tris has a new best friend, I also am pleased that she has had someone looking out for her all these years when I wasn't here to do so. Christina surprised Tris with her boyfriend Will. They, just like the rest of us, started to chip in at whatever else needed to be done. I admit, although Christina does seem a little high maintenance, I can see why she and Tris have such a wonderful bond. Together they balance each other out. Christina brings out the side of Tris that she struggles with, while Tris also keeps Christina well grounded.
As dinner cooks in the oven, we all head out back to play a few rounds of football. We divide into two groups, boys versus girls. We all decide to place a little wager on the game: the sex that loses has to clean up the kitchen. For the next couple of hours, we all laugh and tease each other. Zeke grabs Shauna from behind, swinging her around with one arm, when she has the ball. I have fun blocking Tris, I can't help it... she is so short and small. She is so cute when she is frustrated.
We all go running when Natalie calls out that dinner is ready, the game suddenly forgotten. It feels like old times again, hearing her call out to us kids that dinner is ready. As we approach her, she demands that we all go get cleaned up before dinner. I lean in kissing her on her cheek. I didn't just miss Tris, I missed Natalie too. The one woman that was like a mother to me, when my own mother passed away.
I sit back, loving the feel of Tris' hand in mine. There is nothing but laughter and chatter that fill the air as platters of food get passed around the table. I look around at all the faces... some are new, while others are familiar. It's just funny where life can take you sometimes, the people who enter your life. How the people that should love you end up hurting you, and the people that are strangers to you can become like family. How a lost love can be found again and survive. One thing I know for sure... love, whether it's new or found again, is a true blessing in disguise.
A/n
I also would like to Thank everyone for following, supporting and reviewing not only this story but each and everyone that has and is still being written. I HOPE ALL THAT CELEBRATE THE HOLIDAY, HAS A VERY HAPPY THANKSGIVING FROM MY HOME TO YOURS.
I also would like to send out a special thanks to FDFobsessed, who is also there to allow me to pick her brains each and every night.
Along with Dimpls742 and divergentpanda46.. who is always willing to help my terrible grammar.
Happy Reading EVERYONE! Happy Thanksgiving!
Trini