Chapter Eighteen

I sat in the backseat, tucked in between Kathryn and Casey, as we headed to our first stop at the Jasper Hills Cemetery. Two-Bit turned on to the road that weaved through the land that held so many people's loved ones. Casey excitedly spotted Darry in the back acreage, working on weeding around some older grave stones. Two-Bit drove towards him, honked and slowed the car to a stop. Darry looked up at us, slipped off his gardening gloves and walked towards us with an inquisitive look on his face. Everyone filed out of the car to stand in the warm sun.

"Everything okay?" Darry asked Two-Bit as he squinted in the morning sun.

"Yeah, just chauffeuring around the Tulsa Lady's club!" Two-Bit joked and gestured towards the four of us.

Kathryn walked over to her husband. The two exchanged a sweet kiss then she gestured towards me with a wide grin. "Scout's got something important to show you."

"Oh yeah?" My brother said as he walked over to stand in front of me. "Something good I hope."

Casey exclaimed excitedly, "not just good, great! I'd say super-duper!"

Darry laughed, hitched his thumbs into his front pockets and looked down at me. "Well, what is it?"

I pulled the letter from my pocket and handed it to him.

"What's this?" My brother asked.

"Read it, and you'll find out." I directed him. "Then let me know if you think it's 'super-duper'!"

My brother pulled the paper from the envelope and unfolded it. As his eye's read the words, a satisfied expression filled his face. "Sissy, this is super-duper! How and when did you get this?"

Kathryn sweetly shared the story. "Mrs. Dillard surprised us with it this morning. The lady was as excited to give it to us, as we were to receive it."

Darry handed the letter back to me and noticed my apprehension. "This is good news. You want to come home, don't you?"

"You know what I really want?" I asked nostalgically, then sighed, "I want to go back in time. I want to go to bed tonight in my old room next to mom and dad's room. I want to lay in my bed and watch you make a sandwich before you turn out the kitchen light and say 'night Sissy' and I say 'night Darry, sleep tight' and you tell me 'don't let the bed bugs bite'. I want to lay there in the dark, completely unafraid, listening to mom and dad giggling in their room and shushing each other so they wouldn't wake us. I want Dally to stroll in through the front door with Johnnycakes by his side. I'll pretend to be asleep when dad comes out of his room and gives them both the third degree about where they've been and what they were up to 'because there's no place for bad behavior in this neighborhood' even though dad knew better." I looked at Casey. "And don't tell me if I went back it'd all be different, cause if I could go back, I'd also make it so you moved in next door, and we would still become friends, and Owen and I could have still met in our history class, and Kathryn and Darry already knew each other. At least back then no one had as many worries as we all do now."

Darry smiled gently, "Scout, I know you were young when they died, so you think that's true, but mom and dad had hard times too. They just didn't let you see that. Believe me, there were just as many stress filled days as there were happy ones."

A rush of emotions raced through my mind as I thought of everyone who had died in the past year and a half. My eyes turned red with tears and Two-Bit took notice. "Whoa, whoa, whoa, you doing okay?"

I sniffled and wiped my eyes to make room for the next set of tears. "Truth is, I'm fine one minute, and then all of a sudden, for no particular reason, I am just not fine anymore. I feel broken and confused."

"Don't sweat it." Two-Bit tried to casually comfort me. "Like we've all said, you're a tough cookie, you're gonna be okay."

I shook my head and wiped my eyes again. "I know everybody wants me to be okay already, but I can't get past the feeling that I helped kill that boy."

"Which boy, you mean James?" Casey questioned me. "Cause honey, he aint no boy! He was a full grown, horrible adult and he knew better than to do what he did. None of that was your fault. I know you know that, so stop trying to change your own mind."

I unintentionally snapped back, "Well, it isn't always about him. I got Mrs. Jasper and Owen on my mind too. What am I supposed to do about all that mess?"

Darry tightly grabbed my shoulder and looked me in the eye. "Don't go getting yourself all worked up. Remember, nobody's saying you gotta let it all go today. We're all just saying you gotta move ahead each day, and you are doing that. In time, this is all going to work itself out, and you're gonna be fine."

Dorothy smiled at me. "And Scout, you don't have to move home if you don't want to. You are more than welcome to stay with us as long as you want to."

Two-Bit took exception to the suggestion. "She'll be fine at home. We're headed there next, you'll see, everything is taken care of, and she's going to be okay there."

As we headed towards my neighborhood, I felt my muscles tense and my heart rate begin to accelerate. I swallowed hard and squeezed my hands together in my lap to hide my fears. I thought again about the switchblade in my pocket and whether, or not I would ever have the nerve to use it.

Two-Bit took notice of my apprehension and started a conversation to help lighten the mood. "I sure hope Sheppard sees me driving around the neighborhood in this ride. He'll think I lost my mind and stole it!"

"He'll probably think you got a new job as a limo driver with those rich women in the back." Casey blurted out.

I cringed, but Kathryn and Dorothy laughed at my friend's comment.

Two-Bit laughed too. "It sure does drive nice. Makes you think about working harder to afford one. Know what I mean?"

I looked at Two-Bit and realized he was talking to me. I answered nervously. "I'm too young to have a job."

"Hell girl, I know that! I wasn't talking about you having to work harder. Besides, Jasper will probably just give you one from his collection." Two-Bit laughed then changed topics, "Here we are, Mrs. Ottavi! The Curtis family stomping ground…the other side of the tracks! You wanna to see the sights? You've got the right driver. I know everything there is to know about this neighborhood." Two-Bit turned down a road that headed towards the park. "Right up here on the corner you'll see the spot where we found them Socs beating Scout for walking home from the library. Soda, Steve and I just happened to be coming from the other direction. No telling what would have happened if we'd gone another way."

Dorothy leaned forward in her seat and asked, "those were the boys who apologized when we met them at the new house. Right?"

Two-Bit looked at me, "What is she talking about."

"One of the boys from that night lives next door to Darry's new house. We confronted them about what they did, but it turns out they barely remembered it all 'cause they were drunk when it happened." I told him.

"And they apologized to Scout and promised to look after her." Kathryn added her positive thought.

"Yeah right," Two-Bit muttered under his breath, but Kathryn heard him.

"The boys seemed genuinely remorseful. Don't you think so?" Dorothy asked me.

I let my cynical side show through. "Let's not put all our eggs in one basket just because of one apology."

Casey shot me a look that told me I had to tell her that story later.

Two-Bit continued his narrated tour. "Straight ahead, you'll see the park with the infamous fountain. I'm sure you know what happened there."

Mrs. Ottavi pleasantly avoided discussing the night of Bob Sheldon's killing by changing the subject. "Scout, did your parents ever bring you to the park?

"All the time." I said softly. "My dad came here with us almost every day after work. Mom liked it because it got us out of the house, so she could fix dinner in peace."

"This is where I first met you guys." Two-Bit reminded me. "I was young, maybe seven. I noticed your dad pushing all of you on the swings and I thought, hell I got to get in on that action! So, I ran over and jumped on a swing next to Soda and the rest is history."

"I was so young. I don't remember a time in my life when I didn't know you." I said with a smile.

"You and Pony were so little that you two were sharing a swing. That's how there was one leftover for me! Man, we spent a lot of time growing up in that park. Your dad taught us all how to play football in that park."

"Yeah, then the Sheppards came around causing trouble, so we decided to move the games to the lot to be closer to home." I reminded him.

Dorothy interjected. "Where is the lot?"

"Over by Johnny's house. Man… a lot of stuff has gone down in the lot, that's for sure." Two-Bit said then drove towards the empty plot of land. On the way he slowed to a stop in the middle of the street to let the ladies know where Dallas had been shot.

Kathryn leaned forward and asked me. "Is this where my father helped get you out of trouble with the police?"

"Yeah." I answered softly and rubbed my pounding temples.

"I don't think I ever told you that all that happened to you and your brothers that night broke his heart a little." Kathryn shared. "When he came home, he told me what happened, and he wished there was more he could do for all of you."

"I hope he knows that he has done way more for them than any other big time Soc would have done." Casey said.

"He sure saved my neck!" I added. "I could have ruined my life, and ended up in juvie if he hadn't been there to convince the cops to let me go."

Dorothy leaned over to tell me, "Sweatheart, you wouldn't have been placed in juvenile detention for hitting a police officer."

"I don't know about that. Judge Carlson was always waiting to find a way to punish me if he could."

Dorothy waved off my opinion. "He's just old fashioned and set in his ways. I'm sure he truly believed the decisions he was making for you were in your best interest."

"This is the lot." Two-Bit declared and pointed out the window. "This is where we hang out, rumble, drink, play football. That little shack down there is where Johnny lived. Oh look, that's his drunk mother in the front yard." Two-Bit turned the corner towards our house and laughed as he flipped off Johnny's mother, and she told him to screw himself. "And there it is, the Curtis estate! Best place in the neighborhood. If you were hungry, they'd feed you, if you needed a place to crash, you could stay on their couch. If you needed someone to care about you, it housed the best two parents you'd ever meet."

"Two-Bit, that is so sweet of you to say." Mrs. Ottavi smiled.

"It's the truth! Anyone who could hang at the Curtis home never wanted to leave. Hell, even the Sheppard boys would watch their mouths long enough to get in on that action. There were rules to follow, but rewards too. I miss their parents every day." Two-Bit said as he stopped the car out front.

"I am excited to go inside and see this special place." Mrs. Ottavi grabbed her handbag off the seat to get ready to get out of the car.

Casey chimed in. "I'd love to show you around, but it won't take long, it aint near as big as your place."

I looked at my house and worried about what might be waiting for us inside. My head throbbed and I sassed at everyone. "No one is getting out of this car! We should go! We shouldn't be here without all of my brothers."

Two-Bit turned around to look at me. "Nothin's gonna happen. I'm here to be sure of that. Name one time when something bad happened when I was around."

I felt a tinge of panic pulse through my nerves. "Seriously? What if someone's in there waiting for us?"

Two-Bit looked at me with his eye's wide, "Someone is inside!"

"What?" I asked with concern.

Two-Bit laughed at my reaction. "Relax Sissy, last night Sheppard sent some guys over to keep their eye on the place. It's safe. There's no one in there who wants to hurt you. Let's go show the lady around."

Dorothy spoke up in my defense. "I don't want to go in unless it is truly okay with Scout."

Two-Bit spoke gently. "No one's gonna hurt you. The only guy who planned to hurt you is dead on a slab in the county morgue."

I thought about how that was true, but we still weren't sure if anyone would avenge him. I felt for the blade in my pocket then sighed heavy because I knew Two-Bit wasn't going to take 'no' for an answer. "Fine. Let's go in."

I followed Two-Bit through our front door and saw Curly and Skibby playing cards at the dining room table.

Curly stood up and puffed out his slender chest as he studied who was coming into the house. He seemed relieved to a friend. "Two-Bit, how's it hanging?"

"Pretty damn good." Two-Bit replied as he walked the house to be sure each room was safe.

Curly noticed I was behind my friend. His eyes grew wide and he smiled in relief to see me. Uncharacteristically, he hugged me. "I am happy to hear that greaser didn't get to you, and I'm here for you if anyone else gives you any flack." Curly pulled his switchblade out of his pocket and released the blade to show me proof that he would be willing to do anything to protect me.

I worried about Dorothy and Kathryn seeing the gesture. I spoke in a low voice. "Thanks, Curly, but you should put that away. We've got company."

Curly looked up and noticed Mrs. Ottavi looking at him. He retracted the blade and put the weapon back into his pocket. He looked at the woman and told her with a sly grin, "you can never be too careful."

I quickly introduced Skibby and Curly to the women before they joined Casey in the bedroom to help her pack her things.

Curly turned back towards me, "I came by your Soc house yesterday to see that you were alright. That sure is one fine place you moved into!"

"Well, I am moving again." I told the boy.

"What? Where to?" Curly asked.

"Back home for a while and then over by the University. Darry's got a new house over there." I told him.

"Seriously? That's gotta be at least three neighborhoods away." Curly leaned on the dining room table. "When are you moving there?"

"Darry says the sooner the better, but he hasn't said when."

"Now that he's married, he probably can't wait to get away from here. I'm gonna miss seeing you around."

I smiled at the boy, "Seriously? You aint ever around here. You're in juvie more than you are here."

"Sissy, back door's all locked up." Two-Bit interrupted as he returned from checking the rooms at the back of the house. "You have any trouble last night?"

"Nope." Curly told him. "Not a peep. Them Northsiders know better than to come around here after what their boy did."

Curly turned towards me. "Don't you worry 'bout nothin' cause we all are gonna be watching over the house as long as you want us to." The boy smiled at me and suggested, "I'd even be willing to lay in bed with you and hold you if you'd feel safer."

I laughed at the offer. "I hate to disappoint you, but if I am allowed to let a boy sleep in my bed, you wouldn't be my first choice."

Skibby laughed, "Let it go man, you know she's got boyfriend."

Curly laughed with him. "Someday Curtis! Someday you'll realize what a catch I could really be."

"Sheppard, why you always hittin' on her, and never me?" Casey walked in to the room and flirted with Curly. "At least you'd stand a chance with me!"

"Oh yeah, Dobbins?" Curly took the bait. "Whatcha doin' tomorrow night?"

Casey struck a sexy pose and told him, "I'm movin' back to New Mexico to be with my momma."

"Seriously!" Curly laughed. "That's why I never asked you out. You're nothin' but a tease!"

"Curly Sheppard, you'd love a tease in your life." Casey joked with the boy as she gathered her items and headed back to the bedroom as everyone laughed.

I curled up on the couch. Two-Bit came over and flopped down next to me. He lightly petted my hair. The gesture helped to dull my raging headache. Casey walked back out to the dining room and announced, "I'm all packed up and ready to go to lunch!" She sat down on the couch and looked over at me. "Being back in the neighborhood aint as scary as you thought, is it?"

"I'm doing okay. Just keeping my guard up." I told her.

"You aint got nothing to worry about." Two-Bit reminded me.

I looked away and rolled my eyes in disagreement. I didn't share Two-Bit's confidence. I had no idea if I was safe, or if someone was just a moment away from finishing what James' had started.

Kathryn and her mom walked into the living room. Kathryn suggested we stop over to visit with Sodapop soon so we wouldn't be late to lunch. Mrs. Ottavi agreed and told Curly and Skibby it was nice to meet them. I stood up from the couch and was startled by a man with his face pressed against the living room window to peer inside the house. I screamed out in terror. Two-Bit and Curly leapt to their feet to protect me. Curly pulled his knife from his pocket. I shoved my hand into my pocket to grasp my own blade. The front door opened and Tim walked in followed by his friend Rex who was laughing at the fact that he had scared me. I let go of my blade and kept it concealed in my pocket.

Tim snapped at his brother, "idiot, put the knife away. Rex, apologize!"

"Sorry, I wanted to be sure the coast was clear, and these nimrods were still here. Didn't mean to scare ya." Rex told me and he sat down in my father's chair.

Two-Bit noticed all the color had drained from my face. He wrapped his arm around my shoulder and told the Sheppard gang, "it's okay, we were just leaving. Keep an eye on the place while were gone."

"Yup." Tim simply said.

Two-Bit told the ladies it was time to go and he led me out of the house. He had me sit in the front seat with him. Casey ran around to the passenger side to sit next to me and Dorothy and Kathryn didn't mind sitting in the backseat. Kathyrn asked if I was okay. As always, I told her I would be fine.

Two-Bit pulled the car up to the pumps at the DX station. As the car ran over the air tubes, we heard the bell ring inside the station. My brother appeared in the doorway and hurried out to the car. He looked through the window and hurriedly asked, "everything alright?"

"Everything is fine." Casey told him.

Soda opened the door so Casey and I could climb out of the car. Soda looked at me with concern, "Scout, you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm doing okay." I told him as I squinted in the bright sun.

"Scout, don't forget to tell Soda your good news." Kathryn reminded me as she climbed out the car.

"Whatcha got?" Soda asked.

I pulled the folded envelop from my pocket. "I got a letter from Judge Carlson saying Darry is officially my legal guardian again and I'm able to move home."

"Home?" Soda worriedly asked. "Are you sure you want to move home."

"Let her move home!" Two-Bit intervened. "Quit makin' her worry. Ain't nothing gonna happen to her in her own home."

Soda frowned, "I didn't say that, and I aint trying to make her worry, but staying away from here may be a better plan for a while."

"Aint no one in this neighborhood gonna let anything happen to her." Two-Bit said confidently. "I personally guarantee it!"

Sodapop quietly fumed a moment. He reached into his pocket and threw Two-Bit the key to the gas pump. "Two-Bit, fill'er up yourself. Scout, come on into the garage, I want to show you something."

I looked over at the other ladies to find Casey keeping them busy by sharing her story about the first night she had met Owen. Soda and I slipped away from the conversation into the service station. I walked into the garage looking around to see what Soda wanted to share with me. We walked to the back of the stall by the toolbox. Sodapop turned and looked at me. "Do you have it?" Soda asked.

Immediately, I knew what he was asking for. I pulled the knife out of my pocket. I released the blade to show it to my brother.

"Good. If you're moving home, you may need it." He told me. "I know I might be overreacting, but I'd rather you had it in case some hood comes 'round trying to teach you a lesson and Darry or me aint there to watch out for you. Know what I mean?"

I gripped the knife hard and shook my head in agreement. Somehow, I did feel a bit safer knowing the weapon was available if I felt I needed it.

"What the hell is going on here?" Two-Bit's voice called out as he glared at the blade and the two of us. I felt embarrassed for getting caught with the weapon.

Sodapop took the knife from me and closed it. "Just making sure Sissy has what she needs to protect herself."

"You knucklehead! Giving Scout a blade aint no different than giving one to Johnny, and we all know how that turned out." Two-Bit disciplined his friend.

Soda grew annoyed with Two-Bit's meddling into the family's business. "Well she aint your sister, so you don't need to be worrying about what we decide to do."

Two-Bit understood that Soda didn't really mean what he said, but that didn't keep the man from sharing his opinion again. "I don't care if she's not my sister. It aint a good plan for her to be carrying steel with her."

"She probably aint gonna use it, it's just to help her feel safe." Soda tried to reason with him. "Darry hopes it will help keep her head from going wacky and stuff."

"She aint got no need for it! We'll look after her, and she runs with the Socs now." Two-Bit argued.

"But she's gonna be back living in this neighborhood with the rest of us! No telling what's gonna happen. She needs to be prepared." Soda explained.

Two-Bit looked me straight in the eye. "Is that true? Are you prepared to stab someone if you need to?" The man waited for an answer that I didn't give him before he added with an intense glare, "'cause you better stab them good, or they'll grab that knife and use it back on you."

My mouth dropped open in dismay as my face began to show frustration. I didn't want to cause a problem between two friends, but I also wanted the protection of the knife.

"Knock it off Two-Bit, your upsetting her." Soda demanded and shoved his friend away with one hand. My brother looked to me. "Don't listen to him Scout, aint no one gonna bother you if you let them know who's boss."

"We're all ready to head over to the County Club for lunch! You're holding us up. Whatcha all talking about in here?" Casey asked as she walked into the garage to check on us.

Two-Bit answered in annoyance. "Scout here's been carrying a switchblade around all morning in case she needs to stab someone today."

Casey casually shrugged her shoulders, "Aint no harm in that. Considering everything, it's probably a good idea for her to have one."

Irritated that no one was seeing the situation from his side, Two-Bit snapped, "yeah, I'm sure it will come in real handy when she's cutting her steak at the Country Club!" Then the young man stormed out of the garage and called for us to hurry up 'cause he was hungry and had to get to work.